As I Am, Reborn: The Art Of Nyela

Disconnect (Letting Go is Flying)

2012-02-06T10:58:00.003-05:00

Disconnect (Letting Go is Flying)
©07/2011
12"x18"
mixed media on paper
This piece is available for purchase.

There is such a thing as too much self-awareness.

This piece came from a repetitive theme in some of my journal entries: a feeling of disconnect between my physical body and my emotions or between myself and other people. It wasn't even something I recognized as such until I heard the song Private Party by India.Arie.

"I'm gonna take off all my clothes
Look at myself in the mirror
We're gonna have a conversation
We're gonna heal the disconnection
I don't remember when it started
But this is where it's gonna end
My body is beautiful and sacred
And I'm gonna celebrate it"

In dreams, a very clear picture of myself emerged. I was light and airy, floating like a balloon, my disconnection from my physical self never more obvious. It was my way of separating the parts of myself that I believed were valuable and worthy from those parts that made me frustrated, angry, that I hurt and that hurt other people.

"All my life (all my life)
I've been looking for (I've been looking for)
Somebody else
To make me whole
But I had to learn the hard way
True love begins with me
This is not ego or vanity
I'm just celebrating me"

No matter where and how far I run, I will still be there...and that's okay.

Artist Statement (Or, Reading the Visual)

2012-01-19T09:55:00.000-05:00

In July, I completely rewrote my artist statement, partly in preparation for applying to graduate school and partly because sitting down and thinking about why I make what I do feels vital to continuing and growing within my chosen art form.

Of all the definitions of what an artist statement is or what it does, this description gave me pause: Your artist's statement can be a moving testament to your creativity and integrity. The expression of this commitment will vary, but the effectiveness of your artist's statement stems from the authority with which you write it. I was taken aback, mostly because I've never thought of myself as an authority on anything, especially not art making. In my mind, I simply did what I did, from a very specific point of view. I didn't realize it at the time, but in doing that, I had authority. With art, I have the power to influence or command thought, opinion, or behavior. All I needed to do is find it and broadcast it to the world.

But first, I had to find the words with which I could communicate that authority, that power. More importantly, I needed to believe that I had it and show it in my work as well as in the ways I write and speak of that work.

After lots of writing, using the questions on the above-linked site as a guide, I feel this statement is my way of beginning to claim that power, that authority:

My artistic practice stems from my history of trauma, of being cast aside, of not knowing, of being made to feel unsafe, unwanted, and without value because of gender, race, culture and sexual identity. I examine and deconstruct the relationships between feeling a sense of "otherness" and developing a perception of self that seeks connections and strives to find beauty in contrasts as well as the links between urban life, identity, memory, nature, personal mythology, and magical-spiritual belief. In trying to find my voice, I endeavor, as Frida Kahlo said, to “paint my own reality”. The female form is incorporated into many of my works, even as I question the idea of femininity. It is the body into which I was born; I use it as symbol, as metaphor, as a vessel that holds hundreds of thousands of years of stories in its ample bosom and the curves of waists, hips, thighs, and stomachs. My works are about changing identities, giving birth over and over again to new and varied definitions of self as we go through the changes of life. Urban imagery often overlaps that of the natural world, as do the ideas of privilege and disadvantage, hope and despair, roughness and healing.I use a variety of media. Each process--painting, printmaking, collage, and mixed media-- transforms both my materials and the way I think about them into something new and different, as we are changed when we share ourselves and our stories with others. Story is how I was first taught history; my art is deeply rooted in both.

A message from Ira Glass to all who do creative work

2011-10-11T16:27:00.002-04:00

It really is just that simple.

Regardless of the creative work you do, you just need to do it. I post this video for me as much as I post it for others, because there are periods of time--days, weeks, sometimes even months--where I am not doing the work of creating. I catch myself doing anything but creating, for a variety of reasons.

I think back to the work I did in college, most of which no longer exists. All of the ideas central to my current work were there. I still ask similar questions. If anything, I ask more questions. Asking questions is a good thing, a great thing...but making the work is the only way to share the questions so that we can all search for answers together.

Chimamanda Adichie: The danger of a single story

2011-08-23T14:03:00.001-04:00

"Stories matter. Many stories matter. Stories have been used to dispossess and to malign, but stories can also be used to empower and to humanize. Stories can break the dignity of a people, but stories can also repair that broken dignity."

My art and this blog are my stories and the stories of those who look and love and live in ways similar to me. These stories may or may not be in direct opposition to how black Americans are portrayed in popular culture, but that is but one story. As Adichie said in the video, "the consequence of the single story is this: it robs people of dignity. It makes our recognition of our equal humanity difficult. It emphasizes how we are different rather than how we are similar."

An important distinction to make is that although we as people are similar, we--as members of various ethnicities and genders and sexual orientations, with various levels of ability--are not all on equal terms in society. She speaks in the video about a global scale; my perspective, though speaking of black Americans specifically, seems to be the same, though her thoughts seem a bit overly simplistic.

"The single story creates stereotypes. And the problem with stereotypes is not that they are untrue, but that they are incomplete. They make one story become the only story."

Revisiting Collage

2011-07-11T16:47:00.000-04:00

Collage is a medium I gravitate to every now and again, mostly when I look at magazines and decorative papers and even bits of typography and see things I imagine could be used elsewhere, in a different story. Yesterday afternoon, I began looking, inspired by collages I saw on Black Art in America...and I found quite a bit.

A friend of mine asked me to explain the criteria I use to pick what I cut out, and the simple answer is that I choose shapes and colors that catch my eye. There are a lot of images that are common to my work, such trees, women and girls, and urban imagery. There is a bit of deep orange, a gilded picture frame, a few doors, some blue from a sky...and I have no idea how or when or even if it will all come together.

Let's see what happens, shall we?

6x6 Summer Blog Tour!

2011-07-05T07:00:00.058-04:00

When I first heard about 6x6, I was excited, in awe of two women that could put together such an amazing project...and of course, I wanted to learn more. I got a chance to ask Kesha Bruce, co-director of Baang and Burne Contemporary Art a few questions about the business of art in general and 6x6 specifically. A common theme was relationships between artists, their art, and audiences. Here's what she shared:

Nyela: You say selling art is about building relationships...but with whom? How?
Kesha: I always tell my consulting clients: “Stop hunting Unicorns!” By that I mean--understand that most “art collectors” don’t walk around calling themselves “art collectors”. It’s not a job title. Just think about the last 3 people who bought one of your artworks. Were they rich celebrity “art collectors” that sit on museum boards and give thousands of dollars each year to art foundations? If so, great! But most likely it was a person who really liked the work, and really liked you, and decided to buy your work. They are an art collector.

Artists need to make a habit of consistently staying in touch my e-mail and by snail mail with people that show interest in their work. Every artist should constantly be adding new people to their mailing list. These people are your collector base!

Nyela: How can artists work together to promote their work?
Kesha: Obviously, I think more artists should get together and produce their own exhibitions. It doesn’t have to be a big production or even a formal, tradition exhibition for that matter. It could be as simple as 3 artists getting together and each hanging 5 pieces of artwork in someone’s living room for an evening. These type of smaller intimate events are a great way to invite people to see your new work in a more laid back fun way.

I say this all the time: Other artists aren’t your competition. They’re your greatest allies. Always remember that.

Nyela: How did you pick the group of artists that would be exhibiting in 6x6? Do they have any particular thing in common in terms of style or theme?
Kesha: There’s a lot of truth to the saying “It’s all about who you know.” When Charlie Grosso and I formed Baang and Burne we picked a group of artists that not only made work we loved, but who we already knew and trusted. The artists I brought on, I had met when I was an Artist-in-Residence at the Vermont Studio Center. I had worked with them day in and day out over the course of a month so I knew their work well and I knew they would be easy to work with personality wise. In the end, I chose people I already had great relationships with. In the end it always comes back to relationships!

To read more about 6x6, read Kesha’s weekly articles on art, art marketing, and creativity and to download a free copy of her guide “The 5 Step Art Career Make-Over” visit her blog at www.keshabrucestudio.com.

"Flee", but from what? Where?

2011-06-29T09:07:00.000-04:00

Flee
9"x12"
acrylic on canvas

I am a restless person at times, often easily frustrated, and this painting is a product of that. I've long felt as if there were external forces holding me in place and I was powerless to change them; I am moving forward, but not nearly fast enough for me.

I can't flee from myself. In the end, I know I will be right where I'd expect, with all the faults and flaws I've always had.

Offering

2011-06-27T12:47:00.004-04:00

Offering

10"x15"

digital

Adventures in Printmaking

2011-06-24T12:22:00.001-04:00

I love linocuts. It is, above all else, a physically challenging medium, requiring patience, endurance, and attention to detail.

Over the years, I have had mixed successes with it, as I don't have access to a press and have instead had to rely on hand-pulling prints, a process that (to me, at least) is more physically arduous than cutting the linoleum. A baren (and/or a wooden or metal spoon) is used to apply pressure to the paper and force the transfer of ink from the linoleum to the paper. Sometimes I get good quality prints, with rich color and crisp whites, but not always.

Not often enough.

As you can see, this is a work still very much in progress. I plan on adding watercolor and/or collage elements to it...as soon as I can get a small edition of good quality prints.

I look at Linocult daily, and I keep trying.

After days, months, years of trying...

2011-06-21T08:43:00.001-04:00

...I am still trying to figure out what it means to live my life as an artist.

It has taken years to be able to define myself as such. When asked I used to always say I was an art student. Even when I wasn't, and I had students of my own. I never felt ready to tell others about my art; they found out about it by accident, when they saw me walking around with paint on my clothes and in my hair or even on my face, or when they saw me with a sketchbook in hand. Then, as now, my sketchbook is just as likely to have a random bit of writing or random doodles in it as it is to have anything potentially ready for display.

What does my life look like as an artist? How can I present myself as an artist to the world?

I wondered about the day to day, the moment to moment. How does the artist fill their hours and figure out where new works come from?

On Finding Ways to Help

2011-06-13T11:29:00.001-04:00

I recently ran into this site, for an organization called Barefoot Artists. This is a project of artist Lily Yeh, who also founded the Village for Arts and Humanities in North Philadelphia.

Immediately, my thoughts upon seeing this are "this is so cool!" and "how can I help?" To be quite honest, I wanted to know more as soon as I read Barefoot Artists mission. I didn't even have to read it in its entirety to feel that this organization has, at its core, goals similar to my own:

Barefoot Artists seeks to bear witness to the forgotten and the oppressed, and works to share their stories with the broader public to promote understanding and action.

By engaging the poorest communities around the world with "participatory and multifaceted projects that foster community empowerment, improve the physical environment, promote economic development, and preserve and promote indigenous art and culture", they are showing, not just telling how art can make individuals and communities better. I like that an organization like this seeks to learn from and develop projects with communities rather than someone coming from somewhere else telling a group of people that they are doing it wrong, whatever it may be.

From this and projects like it, I realize that I, too, can help...as soon as I figure out how.

Purify (Darkness to Light)

2011-06-09T10:30:00.000-04:00

My fascination with the human figure also extends to its underlying components--the skeleton, organs, organ systems, and musculature. I really like looking through anatomy textbooks; it is easy to see the beauty of all that lies under our skin. I then combine that with surrealistic elements--like changing the size of organs in relation to other organs or adding elements that would never exist inside one's body, such as flowers--to tell a story: in this case, of things that are wild, with a certain roughness to them, seeking light where there is none.


Purify (Darkness to Light) 9"x12" acrylic on canvas panel

Sketches from an Artist at Play

2011-06-07T17:30:00.017-04:00

Last Saturday, I did pencil sketches based on prompts given to me from my Twitter followers (and others). I didn't have a theme, but one soon made itself apparent: animals! It was a lot of fun. I just may do it again sometime, as it reminds me that art should be playful and it is okay to step back from super serious ideas and stories...if only for a little while.

There should always be a sense of play in art making, an exploration of both your materials and your capabilities.

On Self-Portraits and "I Am"

2011-06-07T17:20:00.001-04:00

A lot of what I create are self-portraits. I often use images of my face and body as metaphor, to tell a story of which I am only a small part. In the past, I've referred to myself simply as a vessel; I am to gather Story and bring it into the world.

Despite this, I have a hard time with the idea of my self-portrait. It feels a bit vain, a little self-indulgent to sit in front of a mirror (or looking at a photograph of myself) for the time it takes to draw or paint my own image, so that it is not just a reflection of what I see but an image that others would want to look at, not because it is me but because there is something there that makes them want to take a look at themselves.

A friend once told me that she sees a vulnerability to my work that mirrors that of my personality; maybe shying away from calling a work a self-portrait is another part of that?

"I Am"

11"x14"

acrylic on canvas

To the left of my face in "I Am" is an open, empty bird cage. Falling from it are rainbow colored feathers. I am what I am.

"Leaving A Mark" on Threadless?

2011-04-01T12:55:00.000-04:00

A long-standing creative goal of mine is to become a t-shirt designer for Threadless. Those amazing tees are all from user-submitted and -scored designs, and as an artist and a fan, I want in.

Maybe this is my chance?

The theme for this contest? "Acts of Green".

Over a billion people celebrate Earth Day every April 22nd, making it the largest civic holiday in the world. It's the one day when the environment gets the international attention it deserves. This year, Earth Day's mission is to convert heightened awareness into action through the world's largest environmental service and advocacy campaign. We call it A Billion Acts of Green™

Billion Acts of Green™ isn't about changing your entire life around. It's about inspiring every individual to make smart changes that, together, make an enormous difference. You can help us build the movement by sharing an awesome design based on this campaign.

My design, "Leaving A Mark", is up for voting now. For those who aren't familiar with Threadless, each submitted design is given a seven day period where users vote for designs they like best. The ones with the most votes get printed.

Go vote on my design! Share the link with your friends!

10 Easy Steps to Becoming a Better Artist

2011-03-14T13:15:00.001-04:00

A brilliant post and one that, to me, is absolutely essential, from artist Kesha Bruce:

1. Make some Art.

2. Make some more Art.

3. Make even more Art.

4. Make even more Art than that.

5. Make Art when you don't really feel like making Art.

6. Make Art when you REALLY feel like making Art.

7. Make Art when you have something to say.

8. Make Art when you got nothin' to say.

9. Make Art every day.

10. Keep making Art.

Inspired by the great wisdom of Brian Clark at copyblogger.

Kesha Bruce is an artist and the director of Baang and Burne Contemporary Art in New York. Her ideas on art marketing and creativity can be found on her blog at www.keshabrucestudio.com.

"Sheldon" on marketing and selling art

2011-03-14T07:58:00.001-04:00

I think I am learning this the hard way.

Trial and error can lead to something special

2011-03-11T16:40:00.000-05:00

I've read somewhere that creativity is about making mistakes, while art is about knowing which ones to keep...or something like that. I'm paraphrasing a quote someone tweeted. I think I got it right...it seems right, based on my experiences.

Back to the point of this post: trial and error.

I've wanted to experiment with using acrylic transfers for a while now. There are all sorts of ways to transfer a photocopy of an image to an acrylic painting using gel mediums, but the steps are basically the same: apply medium to photocopy and let dry, soak the copy in water, rub until paper begins to fall away, image should be embedded in acrylic and can be added to the painting using more of the medium.

Or something like that.

In my case, though, the gloss gel medium I have isn't quite as transparent as I'd like, so my results were...less than desirable. In the spirit of the ART FIX In-House Residency Challenge, I want to use what I have.

I'm sure I'll try again later.

I originally began this painting months ago. It was to be a companion piece to "I Fly (Return to A Dream)" but quickly went its own way...and then stopped. I'd work on it a bit here and there, never quite feeling that it was at a place where it could be considered 'complete'.

Now, it is.

I think I'll call it "Climb".


Climb 12" round acrylic on canvas

On Drawing and Sketching

2011-03-10T12:17:00.000-05:00

I rarely ever make sketches. I don't ever fill sketchbooks with drawings; a glance through my sketchbook may reveal a few ideas that are really worth developing, but by and large, its empty. I have taught drawing; it is easy to see the difference in the drawings those who draw regularly and those who don't.

I see the value of the sketchbook.

It makes me question my own dislike of drawing: Is it because I think I'm not good at it, or because I'd rather paint or do printmaking? Is my time better spent working on the final product, or visually developing the idea behind it? I know that the drawing can be a final product in and of itself, but those aren't usually done in my sketchbook...

I drew in my sketchbook today, something that I definitely plan on returning to. I also periodically reexamine my sketches, for ideas that could be developed further or something I could incorporate into whatever it is I am currently working on.

Sometimes I think that maybe I don't dislike drawing as much as I think I do. For me, it is a means to an end, catching ideas and images before they are forgotten and helping them grow...as they help me grow in my artistic ability.

The 2011 ART FIX In-House Residency Challenge

2011-03-07T16:34:00.003-05:00

I've been in such a non-creative state lately: unfocused, empty of ideas and energy, stressing about this and that and the other thing. Meanwhile, nothing much is happening, creative or otherwise. I've been reading blogs and Twitter, hoping for something that sparks...well, anything.

Somehow, I ran into artist Kesha Bruce on Twitter, and her ART FIX In-House Residency Challenge. The challenge is simple: use the art supplies you have on hand, finish incomplete projects, and post new art weekly. Seems pretty straightforward, right?

Let's see what I'm starting off with, shall we?

Three canvas panels, three stretched canvases, a three yard roll of unstretched canvas...

Three works-in-progress (two paintings, one relief print), four small stretched canvases, seven blank linoleum blocks of various sizes...

...and one watercolor block.

There might even be more watercolor paper floating around here somewhere! I have no idea, as I am the polar opposite of organized.

To be honest, I have very little idea what I'll do with any of it...where will I start?

In progress

2011-02-11T09:39:00.000-05:00

A sampling of what I'm working on now. As you can see, there are some mixed media, watercolor, and acrylic works in various stages of completion. Some are quite awkward and some I haven't even begun, as you can see...

"Sheldon" on overcoming artistic insecurities

2011-02-04T08:21:00.006-05:00

The Art of 2010 and 2011's Goals

2011-01-05T10:37:00.006-05:00

I hope everyone has had the happiest of holidays. Let's look at the art I've done in 2010, shall we?

The Secrets of Growing Things
Release (Freedom Belongs to Those Who Know the Beauty and Power of Their Voice)
One Thousand Swirling Wishes
I Fly (Return to a Dream)
Protect

I do wish I'd done more, but these seem to be the layered, multi-storied paintings I most want to create.

Still, there needs to be more.

What are my goals for 2011?

Complete one sketch a day for a calendar month
Finish and share at least one piece a month
Continue working on art goals: practice drawing facial expressions, clothing, feet, human figures, perspective, and incorporate found objects into artworks
Write a proposal for an art and social change project
Investigate Kickstarter as a funding source for an art project
Work with a friend to create a website for my art
Experiment at networking with other professionals who have talents I don't
Figure out how to track time spent on art and money (if any) made from it

I feel this is plenty ambitious, and I look forward to the challenge.

Protect

2010-12-06T13:14:00.000-05:00

Protect

9"x12"
acrylic on wood

This piece was inspired a lot by a friend of mine and began with a photo of her. In her, there is both someone who fiercely protects and someone who wants to be protected just as fiercely. She is holding on tightly to that flower, but (I hope) not too tightly, so it can continue to grow and flourish, as it has through concrete...or bare skin.

I Fly (Return to a Dream)

2010-11-25T09:18:00.000-05:00

I Fly (Return to A Dream)
36"x12"
acrylic on canvas

This piece came when I reread one of my favorite children's books, Tar Beach by Faith Ringgold. In it, I wanted to explore returning to a long forgotten dream. In this case, a dream of flying above all that you think you know about yourself and your surroundings. Only in dreams can you within and outside of yourself to look at all you know again, as if it was the very first time...