Reflections Under The Bodhi Tree

The Mom Song

noreply@blogger.com (Paula) — Thu, 12 Feb 2009 07:33:00 +0000

This is really good. It is a song and I could have written it. If you are a mum you will probably think so too! Read more and play the video...

These are the lyrics I’m sure we won’t have a problem
learning these!

Get up now
Get up now
Get up out of bed
Wash your face
Brush your teeth
Comb your sleepy head
Here’s your clothes
And your shoes
Hear the words I said
Get up now
Get up and make your bed
Are you hot?
Are you cold?
Are you wearing that?
Where’s your books and your lunch and your homework at?
Grab your coat and your gloves and your scarf and hat
Don’t forget you got to feed the cat
Eat your breakfast
The experts tell us it’s the most important meal of all
Take your vitamins so you will grow up one day to be big and tall
Please remember the orthodontist will be seeing you at three today?
Don’t forget your piano lesson is this afternoon
So you must play
Don’t shovel
Chew slowly
But hurry
The bus is here
Be careful
Come back here
Did you wash behind your ears?
Play outside
Don’t play rough
Would you just play fair?
Be polite
Make a friend
Don’t forget to share
Work it out
Wait your turn
Never take a dare
Get along
Don’t make me come down there
Clean your room
Fold your clothes
Put your stuff away
Make your bed
Do it now
Do we have all day?
Were you born in a barn?
Would you like some hay
Can you even hear a word I say?
Answer the phone
Get Off the phone
Don’t sit so close
Turn it down
No texting at the table
No more computer time tonight
Your iPod’s my iPod if you don’t listen up
Where you going and with whom and what time do you think you’re coming home?
Saying thank you, please, excuse me
Makes you welcome everywhere you roam
You’ll appreciate my wisdom
Someday when you’re older and you’re grown
Can’t wait ’til you have a couple little children of your own
You’ll thank me for the counsel I gave you so willingly
But right now
I thank you NOT to roll your eyes at me
Close your mouth when you chew
Would appreciate
Take a bite
Maybe two
Of the stuff you hate
Use your fork
Do not you burp
Or I’ll set you straight
Eat the food I put upon your plate
Get an egg A, Get the door
Don’t get smart with me
Get a Grip
Get in here I’ll count to 3
Get a job
Get a life
Get a PhD
Get a dose of reality
I don’t care who started it
You’re grounded until your 36
Get your story straight
And tell the truth for once for heaven’s sake
And if all your friends jumped off a cliff
Would you jump too?
If I’ve said it once, I’ve said at least a thousand times before that
You’re too old to act this way
It must be your father’s DNA
Look at me when I am talking
Stand up straight when you walk
A place for everything
And everything must be in place
Stop crying or I’ll give you something real to cry about
Oh!
Brush your teeth
Wash your face
Get your PJs on
Get in bed
Get a hug
Say a prayer with Mom
Don’t forget
I love you
**KISS**
And tomorrow we will do this all again because a mom’s work never ends
You don’t need the reason why
Because
Because
Because
Because
I said so
I said so
I said so
I said so
I’m the Mom
The mom
The mom
The mom
The mom
Ta-da

For more funny stuff go to
A Bit Of Fun!

The Error Of Your Ways

noreply@blogger.com (Paula) — Wed, 04 Feb 2009 05:27:00 +0000

Book Review: Your Erroneous Zones by Dr Wayne W. Dyer

There are many paths to personal freedom and during our journey we will encounter many opportunities. Some will resonate and some will not make sense to us until the right time approaches.

In the early eighties I came across one of those opportunities. It was in the form of a book by Dr Wayne W. Dyer titled “Your Erroneous Zones.” Clever title, I thought. It was originally published in 1977 and I read somewhere that it spent around 64 weeks on the best seller list so I was not the only one that resounded with it.

Some have called this book radical which makes me smile because it contains the simplest and most sensible messages of all. Dr Dyer’s aim is to teach us to take charge of ourselves and that we can indeed choose how we feel. He quotes Tolstoy’s Ivan Ilych as he awaits his own death, "What if my whole life has really been wrong?”.

Those impulses Ivan Ilych had ignored; could they have been real and the rest false? What a sad fate to come to the realization just days before your death that you have been living the wrong life professionally and socially and all the material possessions along with the social status you coveted are nothing but a lie.

The first thing Dr Dyer teaches us that you can choose how you feel because of the simple fact that every feeling is preceded buy a thought therefore changing your thoughts will change your feelings. That is to say that if you are feeling sad your “self talk” has a lot to do with the intensity of your despondency and Dr Dyer goes as far as to say that there are times when you can even choose health over illness.

There is a section in the book designated to putting to rest some common myths. One I like is the myth that the higher your IQ the smarter you are. Dr Dyer challenges this myth,” …mental hospitals are clogged with patients who have all the properly lettered credentials – as well as many who don’t. A truer barometer of intelligence is an effective, happy life lived each day and each present moment of every day”.

Present moment living is a thread right through the book, “The present moment that elusive time which is always with you, can be most beautifully experienced if you allow yourself to get lost in it. Drink in all of every moment and tune out the past which is over and the future which will arrive in time.”

What could be more freeing than living in the now and savouring those special moments? I have a tendency to regret the past and worry about the future and I know I would be shocked to know just how much time I wasted regretting things that can’t be changed and worrying about situations that have not occurred.

Guilt and worry are noted as useless emotions. Experiencing guilt over a past event that cannot be changed and worrying about a future one that has not yet happened is wasting your precious present moments. Both these emotions are immobilizing and futile. The difference between guilt and learning from past mistakes is vital as guilt alone will only result in stressing over what cannot be undone.

Dr Dyer claims that the first time you fall in love should be with yourself. Self hate is the most debilitating habit of all. He talks about self acceptance without complaint and developing a positive self image which begins with showing yourself a little kindness and nurturing your body with good health. He states, “Stop equating your performance in anything with your self worth. You may lose your job, or fail a given project. You may not like the way you performed this or that task, But that doesn’t mean you are without worth.”

The important thing to remember is that the essential “you” is not your big house, your fancy car or glamorous job. Sometimes too much emphasis is placed on these things which can cause loss of present moment fulfilment.

Dr Dyer denotes the significance of loving yourself in order to be able to freely love others. Along with treating yourself with love it is paramount to put a stop to the constant need of approval. It is vital to see how futile it can be to make another’s view more important than your own. If you care for and love yourself why allow someone else’s opinion to be more important than your own? We all enjoy endorsements from other people but if desiring approval has become a need then you may have work to do.

Along with letting go of outside opinions Dr Dyer devotes a chapter to breaking free from the past. He explains that too often we live with tags placed on us in the past and cannot fathom the fact that we may not need those labels today. If you are questioned as to why you regularly do the same thing over and over and your reply is, “Because I have always done it that way” it may be time to challenge the behaviour. When life is not all that we would want it to be, it is interesting to recall American advisor Anthony Robbins, “If you do what you have always done, you will get what you always gotten.” Time and things change and what was appropriate at one time of your life may not necessarily be the ideal for you now. I believe that each of us is reborn each and every day; so let go of the shackles of the past and live fully for today.

Another erroneous habit is what Dr Dyer calls “The justice trap.” A big cause for stress, anxiety and anger is the belief that the world should be fair. Dr Dyer goes as far as to say that justice does not exist. Life isn’t fair. Living with the expectation of fairness at all times is the biggest cause of angst among us. Too many people run their relationships with a tally sheet. There are a few examples of this in the book, “It’s not fair you get to do this or that, I never get to do anything…” It all comes down to the need to control which is a misleading notion. It is not possible to stay on top of everything at all times and if that is a need for you consider the fact that it not humanly possible and that, with letting go comes true freedom.

“In any relationship in which two people become one the end result is two half people.” This is the quote that introduces the chapter titled “Declaring Your Independence” which focuses on the dynamics of a relationship that allows each individual to be his or her self without any expectations or demands. There is a reference from Louis Anspacher about marriage in America, “Marriage is that relation between man and woman in which the independence is equal, the dependence mutual, and the obligation reciprocal.”

Dr Dyer talks about the importance for parents to balance attending to children’s needs while allowing them to grow independently. Mum and dad can always be there for their children to lean on while they are learning not to need the support. The premise that “you are treated the way you teach others to treat you” is prevalent in this section.

If you succumb to manipulation or put downs you are also responsible for the fact that you are allowing your partner to treat you that way. I remember years ago I was in the midst of crying after yet another break up while asking myself, “Why are men treating me this way?” The answer came to me; because you let them do it! Their bad behaviour was not my fault but the fact that I had been letting them treat me badly was my responsibility and the negative experiences would have continued had I not acknowledged that fact.

Putting an end to procrastination is another tool for fulfilment. Inertia and wishful thinking are not useful contributors to a happy life. Wishful thinking alone is not going to do it. Appropriate goals and action is what is required. When setting a goal it is important to strive for something that is achievable. To quote Dr Dyer, “It takes not one drop of sweat to put off anything.”

One section I particularly like in the book is the chapter titled “Breaking the barrier of convention” and the blind compliance to the “shoulds” of society, etiquette and rules and law. Clearly we all need law and order in society and I am not advocating breaking such rules but there are times and places where the so called regulations make no sense. Dr Dyer quotes the words of Herman Hesse in Damian. “Those who are too lazy and comfortable to think for themselves and be their own judges obey the laws. Others sense their own laws within them; things are forbidden to them that every honourable man will do any day in the year and other things are allowed to them that are generally despised. Each person must stand on their own feet.” He says “If you must comply with all the rules all the time, you are destined to a life of emotional servitude.” Radical as it sounds the message here is to teach us to think for ourselves while balancing that with the guidelines that keep order in society.

Throughout the book the word choice shows itself regularly because it is all about choosing how we perceive and feel. The second last chapter is about saying farewell to anger. Dr Dyer proposes postponing angry reactions is a good first step in eliminating them. The preceding advice about releasing expectations is summed up with this introduction,” The only antidote to anger is to eliminate the internal sentence, ‘If only you were more like me’.”

Present moment living will assist in eliminating fear of the unknown in our quest for fulfilment and Dr Dyer reminds us of Albert Einstein’s words from ” What I believe” (1930), “The most beautiful thing we can experience is the mysterious . It is the true source of all art and science.”

The book ends with a portrayal of an individual who has eliminated all erroneous zones from life. It contains a piece from the Reader’s Digest which starts with the
quotation, “Nothing on earth renders happiness less approachable than trying to find it.”

This book is radical, direct and life changing. It will show you that your existence is your own and if you desire to be the best that you can be, you need to let go of those debilitating habits that keep you trapped. It is time to break free and live the life you deserve.

For more articles like this one check
Spirituality and Self Development

Funny!

noreply@blogger.com (Paula) — Wed, 21 Jan 2009 12:49:00 +0000

Have you seen this commercial?

For more fun stuff check here A Bit Of Fun!

Witnessing Miracles

noreply@blogger.com (Paula) — Mon, 19 Jan 2009 07:45:00 +0000

"Miracle on the Hudson: 155 survive crash as jet hits river in New York. Pilot of US Airways plane avoids disaster and saves lives of 155 people after engine catches fire due to suspected bird strike”

“The pilot of a US Airways jet managed to avoid disaster and save the lives of all 155 people on board his stricken plane when he ditched into the icy waters of the Hudson river moments after taking off from New York's LaGuardia airport. The extraordinary escape was immediately dubbed the miracle on the Hudson…”
(Ed Pilkington in New York guardian.co.uk, Friday16 January 2009 02.14 GMT)

The pilot has been named a hero for his calm actions during a dire situation which could have resulted in the loss of many lives. The Governor of New York, David Paterson said, “We have had a miracle on 43rd street and now we have a miracle on The Hudson.” Many would agree that this incident is a clear example of a modern day miracle. What is a miracle?

According to the Online Encyclopaedia Britannica a miracle is "an extraordinary and astonishing happening that is attributed to the presence and action of an ultimate or divine power".

In the Bible every time the word miracle is mentioned it refers to Divine Intervention and reminds us that God is ever present.

I came across an account by Suzanne Lamarche on Global Psychics

She tells a story that started on the highway. She was driving home from a weekend away and encountered a young man driving a black Neon. She also drove a Neon and both had a little fun playing car tag for quite a while until he turned into a side road.

When the young man returned home and was unpacking his car he noticed Suzanne driving past and realized that she lived in a building nearby who happened to share the same parking garage as his. Taken by her he later took a chance and left a note on her car. Upon her return to her vehicle the next morning Suzanne found the note and consequently they met for a drink that evening.

The fact that they came together on the highway and happened to live close to each other was amazing enough but they soon learnt about other similarities.

They came from the same town and their parents still lived there. Both had large families and each had an adopted sibling, an older sister obtaining University Masters and a brother who was a chef.

After a year of dating Suzanne found another note on her car windshield. This one invited her to dinner. There he proposed and the rest is history.

This tale could have been included with my other examples in Destiny-Coincidence Or Fate? One may wonder whether fate, coincidences and miracles originate from a Divine Hand; the same Hand that guided Chesley Burnett “Sully” Sullenberger to heroically glide his plane on to the Hudson River off Midtown Manhattan.

On March 27, 2007 Laticia Gibson reported on Australia’s current affair show Today Tonight, “After a 17-year-old boy died, oil began seeping through his bedroom walls and ash appeared on the floor. Some now believe he was a messenger of God”

Crowds gathered outside a suburban home in Sydney all hoping to be touched by the hand of God through the mysterious oil seeping through 17-year-old Michael Tannous’ bedroom walls; he died in car crash five months prior.

Forty days after the boy’s death his parents George and Lina noticed a line of oil appear on his bedroom wall; this was followed by the strange smell of roses in the home. They believed the deliverer was their dead son Mike. The line of oil spread across the wall and coal coloured ash inexplicably began materialising from thin air
Mike’s parents were convinced that it was a sign their son was still alive.

According to Mr and Mrs Tannous, Mike’s initials and a cross appeared on a ceiling in the house along with an image of Jesus.

People seeking healing made pilgrimages to the small home and lined up for hours waiting to get inside. Twelve year old Elana Ibiahim claimed her crippling joint pain was healed by the sweet smelling oil emanating from the walls in Mike’s room. "I was sick, I had joint problems and they kept swelling up," Elana said." I couldn't kneel and sometimes I was unable to write because of them. I put it on the first day and since then - all my pain is gone”

At the time this was reported 3,500 people received the free gift of a cotton bud soaked in the holy oil as they entered the house.

Local Catholic priest, Father Michael Melhen said that although he could not speak on behalf of the Catholic Church he was amazed by what he witnessed in the Tannous household.

It is said that Mike may have predicted his own death with rough illustrations and poems describing the afterlife including a gate which bore an uncanny resemblance to the seeping oil.

The Tannous family apparently did not accept any payments from anyone visiting their home. They shared the conviction that God hand-picked Mike from birth.

There are many who believe this to be a true miracle from God as well as many who are dubious such as Peter Bowditch from Australian Skeptics. He said that for a miracle to be true, it has to have scientific evidence to back it up. ”To become excited about it, you have to be a true believer," Mr Bowditch said on Today Tonight, "That is, you have to be someone who is immersed totally in some form in faith.” I am of the opinion that the lack of scientific evidence is what makes an unexplained incident a miracle.

Reports of such occurrences have captivated us for centuries. Paranormal activity is sometimes called religious pareidolia. It ranges from visions to images of Jesus on tortillas! Here in Perth, Western Australia a statue of the Madonna allegedly bled tears of oil.

According to the Bible, miracles are God’s way to interact with earthly people. They have been known to teach or represent God’s presence. Through miracles Jesus declared His authority over mankind and authenticated His identity as the Son of God.

I have my own personal accounts of miracles, perhaps not as grand as oil dripping from walls but magical all the same.

My husband and I tried to conceive a baby for almost six years, attempted fertility treatments and exploratory surgeries all to no avail until one day late in 1999 I threw my hands up in the air and amongst my tears I prayed, “I have had enough, I cannot do this any longer. If a baby is not for me then so be it, but please God take the longing away, I just want to be happy.”

I focussed on my partner and my pets from that day onwards. We moved house and for the first time in years I felt a sense of peace. Exactly one month later a doctor’s visit revealed the unexpected; I was pregnant! The result, nine months later, was Kayla Michelle a beautiful blue eyed baby girl. Apologies to the sceptics but if that is not a miracle…what is?

There have been so many incidents in my life that I can call gifts from God, from the way I attained my beloved cats to the Divine Help we received when buying our first home at a time when we had absolutely no money. Many may call these mere coincidences, but that is my point; is there such a thing as a coincidence? Is the power of Faith and Prayer so great that miraculous events can enter our lives? I am wondering … perhaps that may be what life is all about.

A Timely Warning

noreply@blogger.com (Paula) — Wed, 14 Jan 2009 12:04:00 +0000

I read this the other day; useful advice. I thought I would share it.

Important Health Advisory for Women

Do you have feelings of inadequacy?
Do you suffer from shyness?
Do you sometimes wish you were more assertive?

If you answered yes to any of these questions, ask your doctor or pharmacist about White Wine.

White Wine is the safe, natural way to feel better and more confident about yourself and your actions. White Wine can help ease you out of your shyness and let you tell the world that you're ready and willing to do just about anything.

You will notice the benefits of White Wine almost immediately and with a regimen of regular doses you can overcome any obstacles that prevent you from living the life you want to live.

Shyness and awkwardness will be a thing of the past and you will discover many talents you never knew you had. Stop hiding and start living, with White Wine. White Wine may not be right for everyone. Women who are pregnant or nursing should not use White Wine. However, women who wouldn't mind nursing or becoming pregnant are encouraged to try it.

Side effects may include dizziness, nausea, vomiting, incarceration, erotic lustfulness, loss of motor control, loss of clothing, loss of money, loss of virginity, delusions of grandeur, table dancing, headache, dehydration, dry mouth, and a desire to sing Karaoke and play all-night rounds of Strip Poker, Truth Or Dare, and Naked Twister.

WARNING:
The consumption of White Wine may make you think you are whispering when you are not.

WARNING:
The consumption of White Wine is a major factor in dancing like an idiot.

WARNING:
The consumption of White Wine may cause you to tell your friends over and over again that you love them.

WARNING:
The consumption of White Wine may cause you to think you can sing.

WARNING:
The consumption of White Wine may lead you to believe that ex-lovers are really dying for you to telephone them at four in the morning.

WARNING:
The consumption of White Wine may make you think you can logically converse with members of the opposite sex without spitting.

WARNING:
The consumption of White Wine may create the illusion that you are tougher,
smarter, faster and better looking than most people

NOW JUST IMAGINE WHAT YOU COULD ACHIEVE WITH RED WINE!!!

MY LIVING WILL

Last night my sister and I were sitting in the den and I said to her, "I never want to live in a vegetative state, dependent on some machine and fluids from a bottle to keep me alive. That would be no quality of life at all, If that ever happens, just pull the plug."

So she got up, unplugged the computer, and threw out my wine.

She's such a bitch.

Reasons To Keep Your Distance From A "Momma's Boy"

noreply@blogger.com (Paula) — Thu, 08 Jan 2009 13:08:00 +0000

Allow me to tell you a story about the handsome young man and the desperate girl. It is a true story and I can convey to you every detail precisely as it occurred because this dismal tale is my adventure.

I have withheld his real name because at this stage of my life I do not need to hear from him, his lawyers or worse his mother! For the purpose if this account I will call him Tony.

I met Tony in an Australian pub on a Sunday afternoon. Shortly after my arrival there I spotted my friend; a young woman I will call Janice whom I had met at my new job. Being the demonstrative type she shrieked when she saw me and leaped towards me arms wide, smiling while blowing air kisses to me. Janice was ecstatic to see me apparently! She gestured toward the handsome young man and all I noticed was his eyes; very green, very hypnotic on a striking face. He was extremely good looking but I did not fall in love with him straight away. I don’t remember being introduced to him. I did not immediately recollect his face the next time I bumped into him but I recognized those eyes.

I had just returned from a backpacking trip overseas and because I had been away a long time I had lost touch with many of my old friends so when I met Janice I jumped at the idea of meeting new people and building some kind of social life.

I regularly met up with Janice and her boyfriend Gary who introduced me to his old school buddies; Tony was one of them. I spent many weekends with them and got to know Tony quite well although, at first, I did not feel a great deal of attraction toward him. Janice, Gary, his friends and I went out to clubs on a regular basis and I can honestly say we had a ball.

One night after a night of heavy partying the gang returned to my flat where I had been living alone. We drank, smoked weird stuff and played a strange game of charades when out of the blue Tony kissed me; just like that. I wanted to react and shout “What the hell do you think you are doing?” but that kiss was like no other. It had not been love at first sight for Tony and me until that moment. That kiss opened up my heart and he moved right in! When everybody went home I was left half drunk, bleary eyed and bewildered. What had just happened? It was one stupid kiss, which is all that took place between us that night. The one kiss that changed everything.

I didn’t seem him again until the following weekend and for the next few months we always went out as a group. He would kiss me passionately at the end of each night. No words, no communication. Nothing but a lingering goodnight kiss.

One night during one of our outings the guys in our circle got into an argument with some thugs which resulted in Tony’s car tyres getting slashed. We found ourselves stranded so we caught a taxi to Gary’s place and decided to spend the night there while he and Tony planned to return the next morning to change the tyres and collect the car from the club car park. I don’t know how it happened and I know I was not overly inebriated but Tony and I ended sharing Gary’s spare room and it was in that room that the most passionate, painful and draining love relationship began.

We were together for two years and in that time I was not ever included in any of his family events. In the beginning I spent a lot of time at his house while his parents were away on holiday in Greece where they originated from. We had a great time. For two months, I visited him often and while on vacation from work I spent an entire week with him.

We would talk, read, paint and listen to music together. We seemed to have so much in common. I was happy and I knew by then that for me it was love. I looked forward to each and everyday so I could see him until the phone call came that his parents were on their way back home.

His family returned and I was no longer welcome at the house because his mother wouldn’t have it. I knew she didn’t like me the very first time I met her. I had a strong feeling that I just didn’t measure up. She was a small Greek woman quite ignorant and void of any manners. She would just look at me with distaste and her eyes surveyed every inch of me starting from my feet to the top of my head. I was not Greek and I had been married before and in her culture that made me “a woman of ill repute”.

On the rare occasions that I would visit she ignored me and would talk to who ever was in the room about me as if I wasn’t there chatting about how wonderful it would be if Tony met a nice Greek girl. He did nothing about it; not one word to his mum about how she treated me. I ignored the warning bells.

I eventually got tired of her and suggested that he move in with me so we would be free of his mum and live like grown ups, but alas! There was only one grown up in this relationship along with an overprotective witch and a little boy.

On the day we had planned for him to move in he turned up and explained to me that he would have to wait as his mother collapsed upon hearing the news of our decision and a doctor had to be called only to confirm that she was indeed fine. Tony said we would have to wait otherwise she would cut off his allowance. By the way did I mention he did not have a job? He was studying, living with his parents and taking a weekly allowance from mummy dearest.

We continued to see each other at my place and whenever I suggested going away for a weekend together he would respond with, “Oh!Uhm! I don’t think Mum is going to like that!” “Are you serious?” was my reply, “You are 28 years old!” But he was serious; he was very serious and very inconsiderate towards me such as the time he invited me to his brother’s birthday party at the house and refused to come and pick me up because it would upset his mother. So I drove myself and you can imagine how comfortable I felt from the minute I rang the doorbell!

I would call him sometimes and she would answer the phone and inform me that “It was not a good idea for him to come and speak to me, because he had study to do and didn’t I talk to him yesterday?”

The handsome young man was just a little boy. A boy who could not let go of mama’s apron strings and when I finally gave him an ultimatum to choose between us he begged me not to leave him and suggested we get engaged immediately and he would stand up to his mother. We arranged to meet for lunch and choose a ring the very next day. I selected a beautiful white diamond solitaire and in my heart I thought I had won him; that feeling lasted until dinner time.

He arrived at my apartment shortly after 6.30 p.m. and as he held my hand in order to place the ring on my finger he pulled away and said,” I can’t do this to her, I just can’t” All I remember is yelling something like “Get out” before the flood of tears came and stayed with me for 3 days.

That was the last time I ever saw Tony.

I ran into him 10 years later in a restaurant. He was having lunch with his children. I looked around to see where his wife was as I saw a woman approach the table. Curiously I looked closer and I recognized her immediately. It was his mother. I breathed a sigh of relief. Yes I dodged a bullet alright!

How to Tell if You Are Dating a Momma's Boy

• Does he live with his parents?
• Is he financially independent?
• Does he often cancel plans due to his mother’s disapproval?
• Does he listen to her advice before asking you for yours?
• Are you excluded from his family events?
• If she calls him does he drop everything (including you) to attend to her
call?
• Does he stand up for you if she is being less than polite towards you?
• Does she answer his cell phone?

If you have answered yes to any of the above take a step back and examine the relationship very carefully.

Ghosts And Reincarnation: Making sense of the life/death cycle

noreply@blogger.com (Paula) — Sat, 03 Jan 2009 09:45:00 +0000

"Life is a journey.
Death is a return to earth.
The universe is like an inn.
The passing years are like dust.

Regard this phantom world
As a star at dawn, a bubble in a stream,
A flash of lightning in a summer cloud,
A flickering lamp - a phantom - and a dream."
The Buddha

A while ago I wrote an article titled Near Death Experiences-What Happens After We Die? In it I described the “for and against” if you like of what happens after we die. I described both sides of the argument and each one made perfect sense. I tried not to disclose my opinion on the subject in order to allow the reader to make his or her mind up.

I have often been asked what do I believe and I have always replied with certainty that, “of course there is life after death” and I would describe what I knew to be the answer; that we all may have lived several lives and may return to the Earth Plane again and again after we pass. I have argued with “non believers” and stood my ground on what I supposed was true and would not hear anything different other than my own view, that is until I began researching for “Near Death Experiences” (NDE) and the way opened up for another way of thinking. After talking with Dr John Happs president of "Western Australian Skeptics" I realised that his estimation made a lot of sense and I began to wonder, “What if he is right? What if there is nothing after you die?” That is a depressing suggestion to say the least, but it is incomprehensible to me that the essence of a person can just cease to exist.

Edgar Cayce (1877-1945) had the ability to leave his body and travel into the after life. He has astonished people from all over the globe with tales of his experiences. He had the ability to experience regular NDEs and developed the ability of being able to diagnose and treat sick individuals from a distance by astral travelling.

Christian beliefs are that once the body is no longer alive the soul faces judgement and is directed either into Heaven or to suffer forever in Hell.

Buddhists accept as true that whatever happens to the soul after the body dies is related to how the individual lived his or her life. Karma comes into play in regards to determining what life the spirit will be reborn into. They believe in the concept of reincarnation.

According to The Government Of Tibet In Exile His Holiness the Dalai Lama was born in 1935 and was acknowledged when he was around two years old to be the reincarnation of 13th Dalai Lama, his forerunner.

Reincarnation is the acquisition of a new body when the old one dies and therefore beginning a new life without any conscious recollection of the previous one. It has been quoted that the Buddha compared this process to the lighting of a new candle with the flame of the old one thus keeping the flame lit independent of the original source. This course of action is known as "transmigration.” The idea is to learn through each life and eventually achieve the wisdom of “Nirvana”, the state of freedom from the cycle of death and rebirth.

The basic assumption is the life is suffering and you will never achieve complete peace on earth based on material pleasure. The only road to complete peace is to follow Buddha and detach one’s self from all worldly attachments. Over time the ego will dwindle and eventually over time Nirvana will be reached.

There are spirits who have been through many lifetimes and have come to true understanding and do not physically reincarnate on the earth plane in order to help others are called "Bodhisattva". They exist in a Bodhisattva realm and are comparable to Christian Saints and people pray to them for assistance.

Buddhists believe that what we call soul or spirit, the “mindstream" lives on from one life to the next until Nirvana is reached. The cycle of rebirth is called “Samsara” and this is where Bodhisattva remains out of compassion for other’s quest for enlightenment.

So regardless of your convictions a lot of us are comfortable with the idea that we are all inherent spirits and we are much more than our physical bodies.
There are endless reports of ghost sightings and many theories in regards to this.

According to Wikipedia encyclopaedia, “A ghost is the apparition of a deceased person, frequently similar in appearance to that person, and usually encountered in places she or he frequented, the place of his or her death, or in association with the person's former belongings.”

It is often said that ghosts are spirits of people who have some kind of unfinished business on earth and refuse to leave our realm until the situation is resolved, which makes me wonder; wouldn’t the majority of us have unfinished business to take care of upon our demise? It is my view that unless you are in a situation where you had an inkling of the time of your death, such as terminal illness when you would have time to “prepare” for our final exit and tie up all loose ends you would have things that you still need to do even though your life may be over. There are numerous tales of ghosts residing in buildings here on Earth and refusing to cross over.

The McPike Mansion for example has been named as one of the most haunted houses in small town America. Built on Alby Street in the town of Alton in 1869 for Henry Guest McPike a wealthy and prominent citizen the mansion has been featured in numerous books and television shows because of supernatural activity and bizarre encounters.

The McPike family sold the home around 1936 to Paul Laichinger who resided there and put many of the rooms out for rent so many tenants came and went until 1945 when Mr Laichinger died. It is at this time that mysterious encounters began to be recorded. Apparently many of the documented occurrences may have been the ghost of Mr. Laichinger and his many tenants.

Unexplained phenomena includes the sound of children laughing and apparitions moving about the house; one of which has been named Sarah who was believed to have been a servant who resided in the mansion. She has been reported as a gentle wandering spirit who would leave living residents and visitors with a feeling of being hugged or touched. There have been reports of Paul Laichinger’s image peering through windows and has been seen doing chores around the place as he did when he was living and it is rumoured that the ghost of a lady who once drowned in one of the bathtubs in 1869 is quite active.

In 1999 Dr Rene Horath and a group of fellow researchers arrived at McPike to film paranormal activity in a basement using infrared equipment as there are no windows therefore no sunlight in the room. A thick mist which, according to Dr Horath felt like feathers brushing against her engulfed what was once the wine cellar. Renee claimed her body felt electric. The theory that the mist may have been caused by humidity was dismissed as there was no condensation on the camera lenses and could not be felt on the skin. The mist appeared to have a will of its own moving around and changing direction and eventually vanished as quickly as it materialized.

I wonder if we will ever have a plausible explanation that will answer the one question we all have in common, what happens after we die?

It makes a great deal of sense and rings true for me that when our body dies it is not the end and I have had the feeling on many occasions that I have been here before this life and I recalled that sentiment very strongly when I was a child although back then I had no real interest in spirituality or a particularly religious upbringing.

I like the notion that the Earth life is a journey. A journey of lessons in suffering and love and when this journey is over we will move on to another plane where we may reminisce about out past earthly experiences and decide from there what lessons we may need to repeat or how we will settle our own Karmic debt.

Is it as simple as that I wonder? I hope so.

Here is the link to a video called Ghosts On Tape; it includes The McPike Mansion mist incident. Fascinating stuff!
Ghosts On Tape

For those who are really curios about the Paranormal this is the link to Ghost Photographs where you will find a list of ghost pictures deemed fake and otherwise.

You can visit The McPike Mansion site for more information.

Merry Christmas From Paula, Andrew and Kayla!

noreply@blogger.com (Paula) — Tue, 23 Dec 2008 14:04:00 +0000

Play video! Wishing everybody health, love and peace...Merry Christmas to all!

Jingle The Drunken Bells

noreply@blogger.com (Paula) — Fri, 12 Dec 2008 10:32:00 +0000

Plans to party during the Festive Season?
Have you seen this video?

Do you always say "yes" when you really want to say "no"?

noreply@blogger.com (Paula) — Thu, 04 Dec 2008 04:54:00 +0000

The late Dr Harriet B. Braiker, Ph.D. wrote a fabulous book aptly titled, “The Disease to Please: Curing the People-Pleasing Syndrome.” Dr Braiker included a detailed description of the symptoms of this ailment along with a quiz for self diagnosis and the “21-Day Action Plan for Curing the Disease to Please.”

Dr Braiker was a frequent guest on Oprah’s show and that is where I first heard of this “condition” and the hidden anger and resentment that goes with it. Passive aggressive behaviour generally follows as the sufferer has an enormous fear of not being liked by others.

We all want to be liked, that is only natural and it is also relatively normal to want others to be happy in our company, but how do we know when the desire for esteem is excessive?

I found as I was growing up that I had to deal with serious self esteem issues; I did have an inherent fear of being unlovable and this often resulted in trying to be everything to everyone to the extent that I did not even know how I felt about anything because I would always adjust my thoughts and opinions as not to upset others or “rock the boat”.

We all know that “we cannot please them all” and as Dr Braiker says, “People pleasers are not just nice people who go overboard trying to make everyone happy. Those who suffer from the Disease to Please are people who say "Yes" when they really want to say "No" - but they can't. They feel the uncontrollable need for the elusive approval of others like an addictive pull. Their debilitating fears of anger and confrontation force them to use "niceness" and "people-pleasing" as self-defence camouflage.”

The “disease to please” is a debilitating condition that can hinder a person’s life and although you may not consider yourself a casualty, you may at times find yourself in situations when the need to say no is overshadowed by the longing to be liked.

I hate upsetting people and just a sad look from someone can break my little heart; some may say my compassion is a good quality but it has caused certain individuals to take advantage of my kind nature.

It was at a time of stress and over commitments that I realized something had to give; I had to learn how to say “No” and still like myself.

There are three ways of relating to one another 1) aggressively 2) passively 3) assertively.

For some the fine balance comes quite naturally but for some of us it has to be learned and belligerence can at first be mistaken for assertiveness. The reason for this is that when an individual has always reacted passively there doesn’t seem to be a middle ground in order to stand up for his or her self. The idea is to find that fine line between aggressive refusal and being a submissive door mat. It is a matter of self-confidence. If you truly believe your own worth it will be a lot easier to set appropriate boundaries.

Make up your mind what you are prepared to say yes to and stick to it. Writing down your goals can be helpful. Prepare a reason or a compromise beforehand if possible. Before you decide to say yes make sure you are totally aware of what your compliance will entail.

If your intention is refusal make sure you make your answer very clear, for example say, “No, I am sorry but I don’t have the time this week” instead of, “I’ll try to do it..."

The one thing to remember is that you have every right to say no whenever you do not want to do something and keep in mind that you can ask anything of any one as long as you don’t forget that they too have the right to refuse.

What about those times when saying no is not an option? There are occurrences when a refusal may hurt someone or your business or worse get you fired! Compromise if you can by asking the other party to meet you halfway or set conditions on your acceptance, such as a time limit, a return favour or simply request you not be put in a similar position next time. It is of course wise to use careful judgment in each instance; sometimes it is unavoidable and you may be obliged to do things you are just not in the mood for. The important thing to remember is not to get worked up about it. If you can negotiate a better solution do so, but if you discover that you just cannot get out of something the best way to handle it is to accept it and endeavour to plan better next time instead of becoming angry and resentful.

My motto is honesty and politeness. I found that making up false excuses has more often than not backfired on me and created problems I did not anticipate. Others may appreciate “I am too tired” or “I don’t feel like it” as a better alternative to a half baked white lie that will more than likely result in you becoming unstuck in the future and it is imperative to deal with people in a polite manner whenever possible. You don’t owe anyone explanations just a gracious “I can’t make it today” should suffice.

Guilt is the price we pay for assertion sometimes, especially when dealing with a master manipulator or a child. Most people do not want to hurt or be hurt, but boundaries need to be in place for relationships to be healthy. A good way not to feel as though you’ve been put on the spot is by telling the party involved that you will think over their request and get back to them. This way you will have time to decide what to do, how to handle it and whether your feelings of guilt are justified.

Remember that in your quest to be liked you will earn more respect by standing your ground when required in a fair and assertive manner, than always complying to other’s wishes, aggressively reacting, or worse of all, silently resenting while fuming with antagonism.

Be true to yourself. Earn respect and stand firm all the while leaving your heart open. Arduous as it may be, your fear of being disliked will eventually diminish and you will probably acquire higher regard from others than you thought possible.

This Is What Life Looks Like...

noreply@blogger.com (Paula) — Fri, 28 Nov 2008 03:32:00 +0000

Another fun slideshow!

My Time With Judy

noreply@blogger.com (Paula) — Thu, 27 Nov 2008 03:19:00 +0000

Some of us spend our lives looking for a mentor, someone who can teach us the most valuable lessons for our lives and then something happens and we realize that the teacher had been there all along. Everyday we encounter people and they generally come into our lives for a reason whether we understand that at the time or not.

Her name is Judy and her intelligence and wisdom sparkled in her eyes. She was a mother to six and a grandmother to thirteen. She led a normal life with ups and downs with her husband of around 50 years. Together they raised the large family she was so very proud of. She worked outside the home during a time and I am sure with such a big brood to take care of, things would have been pretty tough, but that glorious spirit never ever stopped shining.

Our dear close relative was diagnosed with cancer earlier in the year and when we saw her last, two months ago, she looked different, she was bedridden but her spirit was so strong; it was soaring as she lay in her bed and was organizing everyone around her to take care of things, to tie her loose ends, because, you see, her faith was solid and she had come to what was possibly the most peaceful time of her life. You see, she was practicing acceptance. She had come to terms with the inevitable and accepted it; she vowed to leave it all up to God now as she found herself in a situation neither she, nor anyone else could control. She did not want to reach the end of her time on earth fighting outcomes; instead she made the wise choice to enjoy every precious second she could muster with her loved ones as she sat up in her bed as best she could beaming with pride and she observed her husband, their children and grandchildren.

We live a long away from her and I was taken aback when I visited her, not by her appearance – I was prepared for the changes- but her attitude, her acquiescence.

The phone rang early in the morning and we knew that the beautiful light had gone out for sure. I looked at my husband, his eyes were red and he looked tired and old; he was neither of those things a few months ago and I know he will come back to his young self again; right now he is exhausted by his feelings. He has lost his mum. We found out that she had passed and that peaceful energy is gone, the smile, the blue determined eyes are closed. She is no longer breathing. We were unable to be there with her when her light went out and what a bright light it was!

This is about a life, a rich and full life. A life lived with integrity, pride and above all love. There are a lot of people touched by this tragedy and a lot of individuals grieving and reacting to the injustice of this disease.

Why? Why her? Why now? These are the questions that always comes to mind at times like these. I have been told it’s God’s will and everything happens for a reason and there is a basis for all of this, we as mere mortals are not expected to know what that is. I admit that I find that a little hard to acknowledge at present and for that I apologise.

The end can come for any of us at any time. It does not discriminate age, sex or gender. So is there no way of knowing if or when it is going to be our turn.

Judy was not a perfect person, nobody is, but her positivity was an all calming influence to anyone who knew her. You could not help but relax around her.

It is now that she had gone that I have come to realize what a precious teacher she was and I have regrets. Life is busy and we did not spend a great deal of time talking. Whenever we came together, which unfortunately was not often enough due to the distance between us, we would connect so well. We were dissimilar people but she truly was like a dear mother to me. I never told her any of this, even after her grim diagnosis. My reasons were based on denial on my part. I could not practice what she did so well, acceptance. Intellectually I knew what was happening to her, but I was paralysed by another part of me who would not come to terms with the situation and had me convinced that we would spend this Christmas with her, because such an essence could not possibly die; but it did, or at least has moved on and I so desperately need to trust that one day we will convene again and I will again experience her all soothing influence.

My time with Judy, while she was sick, taught me one of the most valuable life lessons, the only time you will ever a have is now. That’s it. Tomorrow will not be here until then and yesterday is nothing but a memory and that is exactly how she spent her last few weeks, revelling in the attention, enjoying being looked after. “I feel like a queen, sitting here in my bed, watching T.V. all day and look,” she said as she picked up a silver bell from the bedside table, “all I need to do is ring this and someone will come running to see what it is that I am needing, how lucky am I?"

Lucky… Judy considered herself lucky. It is not to say that it is fortunate to be bedbound and sick but it is the way we perceive situations in our lives that determine our happiness. It is about choosing how we see circumstances. Judy could have spent her last days miserably feeling sorry for herself and despising her condition and this would have prevented her from the beautiful precious time she had with her loved ones, memories made from love for all of us to treasure.

She became excited at the prospect of reuniting in the after life with a grandchild who died several years ago and she genuinely could not wait for the encounter. Judy’s faith was a precious gift.

Judy was an amazing person who worked hard at preparing her loved ones for a life without her. She gave away jewellery and clothing to whomever she chose so she could see the look on their face as they received the gift; she did not want family members to deal with all that, because she knew how much she was loved and how difficult it would be for her kin to go through all her things while in the depth of grief.

We caught a plane two days after she passed and upon our arrival to her house on the day of the funeral I was handed a box containing a few pieces of jewellery Judy had chosen for my daughter and I. She had everything so amazingly well thought out.

What can I do? What can I say? What should I be doing? The rug has been pulled out from under me and I am at a loss as to how to handle it. How do we put one foot in front of the other now?

This was a warm, courageous, wise and spiritual woman who will of course be dearly missed and who has left a significant legacy. I sincerely hope that by my life’s end I can put into practice even a small portion of her warmth, positivity and acceptance.

Thank you Judy, you have changed who I am,you have made me better and I love you.

R.I.P.

Barack Obama Elected 44th President And A New Puppy For Sasha And Malia

noreply@blogger.com (Paula) — Fri, 07 Nov 2008 01:28:00 +0000

“If there is anyone out there who still doubts that America is a place where all things are possible, who still wonders if the dream of our founders is alive in our time, who still questions the power of our democracy, tonight is your answer…

I was never the likeliest candidate for this office. We didn't start with much money or many endorsements. Our campaign was not hatched in the halls of Washington. It began in the backyards of Des Moines and the living rooms of Concord and the front porches of Charleston. It was built by working men and women who dug into what little savings they had to give $5 and $10 and $20 to the cause…..

And I would not be standing here tonight without the unyielding support of my best friend for the last 16 years the rock of our family, the love of my life, the nation's next first lady Michelle Obama.

Sasha and Malia I love you both more than you can imagine. And you have earned the new puppy that's coming with us to the new White House…”
From Barack Obama’s Victory Speech.

I hesitated before writing this because I have no political knowledge or interest for that matter, but how could I not comment on history? History was made on 4th November 2008. The first African American President of the United States has been voted in by the Public.

I am not American, but I know this will have a ripple effect all over the world. It is not about what President Obama has planned for his country, although even in my ignorance I agree that a change will be beneficial, but what this demonstrates to all of us is a huge step forward for humanity.

I was listening to the radio this morning here in Perth, Western Australia and one of our residents, an American lady named Karen phoned in to the radio station and said, “We have finally opened our eyes, we have been colour blind all these years…”

Oprah Wynfrey a staunch Obama supporter ended her joyful celebratory comment with “the Colour Purple rules”.

John McCain is more than likely a good guy but what chance did he really have?

I’m not starting a political discussion here, because as I said I am too uninformed to stand my ground on anything in regards to this and truthfully, I wouldn’t even know what I’m talking about. I am not a black person either and all I know is what I learned about the oppression black Africans endured and, yes the world has come a long way from 1619 when a Dutch slave trader exchanged his cargo of Africans for food in Jamestown Virginia, but until now, not far enough. The exchange made by the Dutch man was the beginning of a race-based slave system which was fully developed by 1680. This event shaped black people’s existence in America.

Established in 1866 and boasting 5 million members by 1925, a so called organization called The Ku Klux Klan‘s numbers were spreading. The resentment the whites had toward liberated Negro slaves was merciless. Some blacks were tarred, feathered and in some case beaten, lynched and had their homes burnt down.

There was segregation in public places such as restaurants, buses and schools where Negros were not allowed to mix with whites. The discrimination was not limited to the States; I was in Cape Town, South Africa some 37 years ago and I remember entering an all black’s café with my parents and to my surprise being asked to leave

I have been listening to the news and I heard all about the Presidential campaign, the jokes about George Bush, the defamation of Sarah Palin, the disparaging comparison made by John McCain’s team of Obama to Britney Spears and Paris Hilton and more. I shrugged and rejoiced in the fact that I don’t involve myself in politics. Even when I became aware of Obama’s victory at first I did not pay a great deal of attention and dismissed it as an event that would not make a great deal of difference to my day to day life until I heard snippets of Barack Obama’s victory speech and had the realization of what had truly happened.

According to Kansas City.com and Tony Pugh from McClatchy Newspapers John Hope Franklin, professor emeritus of history at Duke University said, “This is one of the most historic moments, if not the most historic moment in the history of this country"

Horace Huntley director of oral history at the Birmingham Civil Rights Institute stated, "I've taught for 35 years and I always tell my students, 'When race comes into play, logic has a way of exiting.' But I may have to revise that thinking after this, now it appears that logic may be overtaking the illogical. It appears there's a groundswell of sensibility."

Nell Painter is a history professor emeritus at Princeton University. "The idea that we can vote for a black person for president just really makes me feel good about the United States, given our history," Painter said. "It's like we're saying 'Look, we're not these bad old people any more. We're fair-minded.' It's a powerfully positive statement about the United States turning its back on its evil ways."

Racial issues may not be completely resolved, but what a giant step forward for America and the rest of the world!

The world can be so sad in places and unfortunately a lot of the time it is our own doing; racial discrimination is one of those instances where we forget who we truly are. We are all spokes from the same wheel and nothing is more heart-rending than the shunning of another human being as inferior.

Barack Obama’s victory is huge. It is the realization of Martin Luther King’s dream and its effects will be experienced by all people.

I used tell myself the world had evolved but had it really? Now I know we are all heading in the right direction.

Homer Simpson tries to vote for Obama

Click Here to see Barack Obama’s victory speech in full.

UFOs And Flying Saucers-What Do You Think?

noreply@blogger.com (Paula) — Thu, 30 Oct 2008 02:08:00 +0000

“UFO EXPERT WANTS TO CONNECT ROBBIE WILLIAMS TO BRAINWAVE MACHINE. Robbie Williams has spent two weeks at Trout Lake UFO camp, UFO expert Michael C. Luckman says Robbie wrote several new songs about aliens during his stay. Luckman has revealed that the singer plans to return to the camp very soon and has invited him to be connected to a special brainwave machine that will help train him for alien contact.” NOW PUBLIC WEBSITE posted by Vinny | October 1, 2008 at 01:44 pm

I have an open mind, I do and if someone is to start a conversation about, say angels or ghosts I’ll be in there with my psyche wide open. I love discussing stuff like that, the occult, the paranormal, you get the idea, I find it all fascinating.

When it comes to the subject of aliens and UFOS my ideas are a little more closed. I find it difficult to get my head around the fact that there are people out there who have witnessed or worse have been abducted by little green men with oversized eyes who jumped out of a flying saucer.

Don’t get me wrong, I am not poking fun at the “believers” as I never dismiss anything and the subject of unidentified flying objects and the like does interest me, I just have a hard time believing a lot of what I read and hear. The thought does occur to me though, that if I was to have had a genuine UFO encounter and I wanted to tell others about it, I would be very upset if I was met with disbelief or ridicule.

The most famous UFO/Alien encounter story is the one from Roswell, New Mexico, USA, on July 7, 1947. Since the eighties this incident has become subject to many rumours and speculations. UFO advocates claim that fragments recovered from the area are those of an alien craft; the US Military states that what was found is the debris of an experimental surveillance balloon connected with a classified program called “Mogul”. UFO enthusiasts not only maintain there is suspicion of a cover-up, they also claim that bodies were also recovered by the Military.

This is the notorious video titled “Roswell Alien Autopsy” on YouTube.

Many have seen this and many have labelled it a fake, but there are also numerous individuals who swear they believe it to be a true alien form lying on the autopsy table.

First Lt. Jack Trowbridge spoke, for what is presumed to be, the first time in regards to his experience with the Roswell incident. He tells the story of the night of the crash on Roswell Confessions.

Lt. Trowbridge was assigned to Roswell in April 1947 and was further assigned to Intelligence along with his commanding officer and Head of Intelligence Major Jesse Marcel. The night in question began with most of the members of the Intelligence Department gathering at Major Marcel’s home for a game of bridge. All were present except for Major Marcel who was out on his pick up gathering debris from a wreckage.

Upon the Major’s return, the bridge game was abandoned to inspect what Marcel brought back. It was a fragment of something aluminium in appearance that retained its shape after being squeezed much like a candy wrapper along with aircraft skins and girders with pictures of hieroglyphics. The next day the evidence was brought into the office and the staff was immediately told to keep quiet. According to Lt Trowbridge, Major Marcel was instructed to lie to the press and demonstrated in a press conference a weather balloon claiming this is what was found. The reason for the omission of the truth came about so “the public would not panic”. Lt Trowbridge said’ “I don’t think that would have happened, but the word came down from above and you do as you are told.”

Carlene Green daughter of Sgt Homer Rowlett also states that her father who had been assigned as part of the clean up crew in 1947 gave her a death bed confession in 1988.He told her that she should believe in a cover up and he had been instructed not to talk about it to anyone. She is backed up by her brother Larry Rowlett who also claims his father revealed to him in the late 80s the existence of graves and the threat from the Government should anyone speak of the incident and lives and family member’s lives would be endangered should the secret be revealed.

There are those who will attest that the so called cover up was in fact an alien spaceship which crashed in the high desert region of South Eastern New Mexico during a thunder and lightning storm near the small town of Corona.

Tom Carey and Don Schmitt are the authors of the book “Witness to Roswell.” On Roswell Investigator, they wrote, “A local sheep rancher found its strange debris – and something else – while riding his ranch the following day. On the advice of friends and neighbours who had urged him to seek a monetary reward, he drove seventy-five miles to the town of Roswell to show pieces of the debris to civilian and military authorities, as well as local media there. The Roswell Daily Record, in a front-page, headline article a few days later, stated that a “flying saucer” had been “captured” by the Army Air Force near Roswell – not Corona – and, as a result, we have referred to a “Roswell Incident”, instead of a “Corona Incident”, ever since”.

Skeptics have argued that the crash fragments were indeed that of a weather balloon. William "Mac" Brazel, foreman of the Foster Ranch found the evidence and because of its unusual appearance decided to report the find. “Skeptics” note that over the years several tests have been conduced in the area including weather balloons, nuclear explosions, detection balloon tests, airplane crashes and dumping of featureless dummies from airplanes and the discovery may have been made up of remnants of such tests.

There are differing opinions and both make sense. It is plausible to think that there may be other life forms in the Universe, in fact I believe it would be very arrogant of us to dismiss that perhaps other species not only exist, but that they may be a lot more intelligent and advanced than us.

There are numerous accounts of abductions and sightings such as the story of Betty and Barney Hill who on September 19, 1961 experienced what is probably the most renowned alien abduction story in the US. It became public knowledge in 1966 through a movie and a book.

Betty and Barney were driving South on the Highway just after 10 p.m. when they noticed a star which appeared to be following them. As it tagged behind them, it seemed to be getting brighter as it went along. Barney stopped the car and took a closer look. He decided it resembled a type of military aircraft. He made a comment, “How interesting, there is the military pilot, and he is looking at me!” He noticed other people staring at him through the windows. At this point Barney and Betty became quite frightened for their lives. They continued to drive at a much faster pace in order to get away from the strange craft. They heard a beeping sound coming from the trunk of the car and as they continued on their way they both started to feel lethargic.

They heard the beeping sound a second time and that is when the doziness stopped and they both felt wide awake again and to their surprise they learnt upon checking the time that it was 2 hours later!

The following day Betty discovered “a dozen or more shiny circles scattered on the surface of the trunk, each perfectly circular and about the size of a silver dollar” as she took her sister’s advice and checked the vehicle for radiation with a compass. There was no movement from the compass until placed on one of the shiny circles; it then began to spin violently and at this point the Hills decided to file a report with Pease Air Force Base in Portsmouth.

It was eventually revealed that according to report no 100 – 1 – 61 of the SAC 100TH Bomb Wing, Pease radar had the reading “unknown” at the precise time the Hills had their encounter.

A few months later the Hills began to feel repercussions from the event such as nightmares and high blood pressure and fatigue. Barney developed a strange circle of warts around his groin area. Husband and wife underwent a series of medical exams and were referred to Dr Benjamin Simon for hypnosis therapy which lasted around 6 months.

Under hypnosis Betty and Barney recalled sitting in their car which was surrounded by “humanoid looking men” wearing black uniforms. Betty described a long needle inserted in her stomach and Barney had a circular gadget painfully attached to his groin. They were apparently given a tour of the ship and finally, before being released they were told they would have no recollection of the events.

I guess seeing is believing. What do you think? Keep an open mind as it may well be that the “Truth is out there”.
Do you “believe?”

More about Roswell:

Roswell Alien UFO's 60 Years Later - VOA Story

I Am Back!

noreply@blogger.com (Paula) — Thu, 23 Oct 2008 14:41:00 +0000

I have not posted on my blog for a really long time. So much has happened and yet nothing has really changed. External factors such as illness, family issues and computer problems have prevented me from writing and, although my hassles are not over just yet I have been really missing my favourite pastime.

It all began with the news that a close relative’s gruelling chemotherapy sessions has failed and there is nothing else doctors can do, “It is up to God now,” they all said and for the first time in years I had to wonder why He wasn’t listening when I had been praying so hard.

I have been talking to God a lot lately asking for my loved one’s health to improve and for a sense of direction especially in regards to my writing and finding a way to increase our finances. My blog has been a lot of fun but unfortunately, it has not contributed towards the bills, so it has had to take a step back, which has not been helped by the fact that my desktop Pc is on its way to Pc Heaven; freezing programs and shutting down on me on a regular basis; it would usually happen while creating a new document which would not save with the uninvited shut down.

“I’ve got to keep writing!” I pleaded to my husband who reluctantly agreed to the purchase of a rather overpriced laptop. I was so excited; there wouldn’t be any reason for me not to come up with masterpieces now!

Well I am on to my third laptop in two weeks. The first one was a demo one, which we purchased with a couple of hundred dollars discount only to bring it home and discover scratches and dents all over it. We returned it, payed $250 extra and arrived home with a brand new model that had never been out of the box. I woke up the following day eager to share my thoughts and start typing.

Well, here I was, downloading, installing and organizing documents and all ready to begin my next piece of award winning literature when curiosity got the better of me and I pressed what I now know is called a media button, just to see where it would take me. It ended up being nowhere. “That’s strange,” I thought, “A button to no man’s land.” This led to the retrieval of the user’s guide which stated in plain English that the media button should definitely lead to an interesting DVD and CD entertainment program. Of course I would never experience the pleasure of “surround sound and clear sharp images” because I had no way of entering the program.

To cut a very long and stressful story short, 15 phone calls and 5 driver downloads later I had to do a system recovery on my computer which meant of course that everything would be deleted and I would have to basically start over again, It was time consuming but I was promised that my problem would be fixed and I would be off and running again. I stayed up until 12.45 in the morning re-installing all my data and just as I finished and was ready to go to bed; I wondered again how the button would go. I pressed it and, you guessed it, it didn’t work! So the next day I waited for some red tape document to be emailed to me so that I could obtain a new machine, which of course resulted in another system recovery! Aghh!! Hours of blood, sweat and lots of tears. The media button problem was eventually resolved only to be followed by backup issues and Internet blockages.

Bear in mind that I have been inconvenienced by another two computers in the past and I’m starting to believe that there really is such a thing as curse.

It is a lot more difficult to deal with life’s s annoyances when we are overtired, stressed and trying to cope with more than one crisis at a time.

I know that in the scheme of things my life is certainly not as tragic as some, although this particular time is a difficult one. We flew to the other side of the country to visit our sick relative who we may not see again. We returned home, my husband became unwell and had to take time off from a job he had been in for only a couple of weeks and, as I gingerly phoned his boss to inform him that his newest employee would not be coming in, I began to worry about our finances should my partner become unemployed, which of course fuelled my misery about not earning and providing for the household. I am so thankful that I have had time at home with my daughter where I could be present for every milestone but a big part of me misses the independence of earning my own money.

As things kept going amiss I became more and more depressed and began to feel more and more disillusioned about something I often write about and that is faith.

That is the problem right there, faith. It’s not that I do not believe; it’s that I began seeing God as someone who hates me. I would never dispute the fact there is a God, I know He exists all right; I’m just not so sure about how He feels about me, because all these situations in my life feel a lot like a slow torture, especially the computer nuisances, a bit like being pecked to death; you fix something and another thing goes wrong, you talk to a help desk in India somewhere and discuss your situation with someone who is very nice but you fail to understand each other’s accents and so it continues until you break and burst into uncontrollable sobbing tears much to the dismay of your family who are wondering, “Never knew she was a drama queen, heck, it’s only a computer, there are more serious things in life to get upset about..”

I am upset and distressed and it is not about the computer. It is about the fear of abandonment that comes when my prayers have not been answered for a long time, even when I change my requests. Where is God? Why is He doing this to me? Although I fear the uncertain future without our sick loved one I know that as a family we’ll pull together and we’ll get through this tragedy.

I find that at times when our plate is full with the big things it takes just one more problem even of a lesser nature like a broken PC to push us over the edge; it is not about lack of money or stress. It is about low self esteem and lack of faith.

The only thing to do, I think, is to put one foot in front of the other, always do my best, learn from mistakes, put them behind me and look for the good, because every situation will have some positive in it, although sometimes it is more difficult to see it.

I’m sure things will improve, they always do. In the meantime I have to work on rebuilding my relationship with the Universe so I can go on with the knowledge that I am not alone and everything that happens is for a reason.

I believe that, I really do.

Advice For Every Woman

noreply@blogger.com (Paula) — Fri, 19 Sep 2008 09:09:00 +0000

This was written by Pamela Redmond Satran. It was published May, 1997 by Glamour Magazine and although I believe that women (and men) should have and be whatever and whoever they want, I think this outstanding piece is a first class guide for ladies.

A WOMAN SHOULD HAVE…
enough money within her control to move out and rent a place of her own, even if she never wants to or needs to
A WOMAN SHOULD HAVE…
something perfect to wear if the employer, or date of her dreams wants to see her in an hour
A WOMAN SHOULD HAVE…
a youth she’s content to leave behind
A WOMAN SHOULD HAVE…
a past juicy enough that she’s looking forward to retelling it in her old age
A WOMAN SHOULD HAVE…
a set of screwdrivers, a cordless drill, and a black lace bra
A WOMAN SHOULD HAVE….
one friend who always makes her laugh… and one who lets her cry
A WOMAN SHOULD HAVE…
a good piece of furniture not previously owned by anyone else in her family
A WOMAN SHOULD HAVE…
eight matching plates, wine glasses with stems, and a recipe for a meal, that will make her guests feel honored
A WOMAN SHOULD HAVE…
a feeling of control over her destiny…
EVERY WOMAN SHOULD KNOW…
how to fall in love without losing herself
EVERY WOMAN SHOULD KNOW…
how to quit a job, break up with a lover, and confront a friend without ruining the friendship
EVERY WOMAN SHOULD KNOW…
when to try harder… and WHEN TO WALK AWAY
EVERY WOMAN SHOULD KNOW…
that she can’t change the length of her calves, the width of her hips, or the nature of her parents
EVERY WOMAN SHOULD KNOW…
that her childhood may not have been perfect…but it’s over
EVERY WOMAN SHOULD KNOW…
what she would and wouldn’t do for love or more
EVERY WOMAN SHOULD KNOW…
how to live alone… even if she doesn’t like it
EVERY WOMAN SHOULD KNOW…
whom she can trust, whom she can’t, and why she shouldn’t take it personally
EVERY WOMAN SHOULD KNOW…
where to go…be it to her best friend’s kitchen table…or a charming inn in the woods…when her soul needs soothing
EVERY WOMAN SHOULD KNOW…
what she can and can’t accomplish in a day…a month…and a year

The Last Lecture

noreply@blogger.com (Paula) — Fri, 19 Sep 2008 04:15:00 +0000

My family and I are flying to the other side of the country next week to visit a close relative that has been diagnosed with cancer. It is a nasty monster that has not relented and withdrawn its attack despite grueling chemotherapy sessions. Our loved one is very sick. All the family members, I’m sure, have been through the usual feelings associated with this kind of situation. The pain, the anger, “Why us?” and for some perhaps even denial.

Speaking for myself I have tried hard to imagine what state of mind I would be in if I had been given such a dismal diagnosis. If something like that doesn’t get you to reflect on your life, nothing will. I put my grief aside for a while as I pondered and, as the Universe would have it; I heard just what my spirit needed to learn; the news that Professor Randy Pausch lost his battle with pancreatic cancer on July 25th, 2008. I had seen Randy a while ago on Oprah delivering what is now famously known as “The Last Lecture”. He delivered “Really Achieving Your Childhood Dreams.” at Carnegie Mellon University to 400 people on September 18, 2007. He looked great, fit and healthy as he spoke to his audience about his condition complete with slides of his CT scans and a remarkable demonstration of one armed push ups.

I am certain that the majority of you out there have heard of Randy and more than likely viewed the 76 minute video of his last lecture. I have enclosed it on this post for those who have not seen or, like a lot of us, want to see it again. It has become an Internet sensation with millions of views along with his best-selling book which has been published in 35 languages.

There is nothing more to say, except what a legacy to leave for your children!
If you have not seen it and do not have time to watch it right now, add it to your favourites and watch it later and be inspired by a remarkable man who has left for us valuable lessons.

The last line of the video depicts the man.
R.I.P. Randy Pausch.

The Dalai Lama on Happiness

noreply@blogger.com (Paula) — Wed, 17 Sep 2008 04:50:00 +0000

“Happiness is not something ready made. It comes from your own actions." - Dalai Lama...

Happiness. We all strive for it. What will make us happy? I know speaking for myself I can come up with quite a few things with money being at the top of the list. Sometimes what causes us to be depressed is trying to achieve a goal when the odds seem to be stacked against us.

Dr Howard C. Cutler is the co-author of ‘The Art of Happiness-A Handbook For Living.’ This book is by Dr Cutler and His Holiness the Dalai Lama.

I bought the book on a particularly dreary day. Although I am a firm believer that each of us creates our world from the inside out, at this particular time there were some external things that no amount of meditation or positive self talk could remedy. I had lack, illness and hatred in my life and I felt powerless to amend my circumstances. I was in low spirits as I picked up the book and began to browse through it.

Opening it at random I came across a page in the chapter titled ‘Facing Suffering’. As the book consists of Eastern and Western philosophies on the art of happiness (Dr Cutler met with His Holiness during several private meetings) I was struck by the Dalai Lama’s practical response to the issue of dealing with affliction in life, “There’s really no avoiding the fact that suffering is part of life. And of course we have a natural tendency to dislike our sufferings and problems. But I think that ordinary people don’t view the very nature of our existence to be characterized by suffering…, he said and continued with a laugh, “I mean on your birthday people usually say ‘Happy Birthday!’ when actually the day of your birth was the birth of your suffering. But nobody says ‘Happy Birth-Of-Suffering day!”

"There you have it," I thought, "not even the Dalai Lama can avoid the torment and pain that comes with living. Pretty depressing realization if you ask me!" Of course when I eventually began to read the book I did learn all about the choices that we all have in regards to how we feel and our ability to change how we perceive things.

The Dalai Lama does not disagree that having enough money, friends etc .can be a source of pleasure although he believes that one can have very little money or be in poor health and still be happy. He often quotes the ‘mind factor’ and that we may not always experience intense bliss but we can still become a lot more content than we are right now. He deems having a calm state of mind a more valuable asset and contributor to long lasting happiness than feelings of ecstasy. So it is a matter of training the mind. There has been a lot written and talked about in regards to mind training and cognitive therapy and the like and I have often wondered how someone so spiritually evolved lives each and every day with all the ups and downs that come with life.

The first item in the book is titled ‘The Right To Happiness.’ Each one of us has a right to live joyfully and the Dalai Lama claims that anyone can coach his or her mind to achieve contentment. When asked what is the purpose of existence he replied, “Happiness.”

In the West we have perceived happiness as intangible and indefinable. Dr Cutler says that the word ‘happy’ is derived from the Icelandic word ‘happ’ which means luck or chance so to the majority of Westerners happiness is not something you can educate your psyche to achieve. Nevertheless the psyche is exactly what the Dalai Lama refers to, “When I say ‘training the mind’, in this context I’m not referring to ‘mind’ merely as one’s cognitive ability or intellect. Rather I’m using the term in the sense of the Tibetan word ‘Sem’, which has a broader meaning, closer to ‘psyche’ or ‘spirit’; it includes intellect and feeling , heart and mind. By bringing about a certain inner discipline, we can undergo a transformation of our attitude, our entire outlook and approach to living.”

This is one of my favourite quotes by His Holiness:
“If you want others to be happy, practice compassion. If you want to be happy, practice compassion."

The Dalai Lama says that one of the ways towards gratification is reaching out to others therefore practicing ‘Karuna’ “Karuna is when you do something good without expectations, even without knowing the other person.”

His Holiness says that when you feel angry, your mind is divided in two parts, one is the angry part and the other is the observer attempting to scrutinize. This means that anger cannot dominate the entire mind. Objective viewing may help to recognize a way of dealing with the rage. When you feel resentment toward another ask, “Who is this person? Is he a body, or is he a mind?” Because there is no answer, the anger will dissipate.

Human nature is such that the more we have the more we desire. A way to true riches is teaching ourselves to want less and by practicing gratitude and expressing thanks for what we do have instead of we may feel is lacking.

An important aspect of fulfillment is self knowledge. Knowing what it is that makes your heart sing and devise a plan to incorporate more of that in your life. Strength is required as you may risk feeling ‘different’ from other people. Remember you have the right to do whatever you like (within reason) as long as it doesn’t harm anyone else.

I think it is an advantage to mix with like minded and positive people. Sadness is contagious and so is happiness.

We must be gentle on ourselves, take care of our bodies and become our own best friend. Too often we can be extremely hard on ourselves. A little selfishness and saying ‘no’ more often doesn’t go astray and a good laugh every now and again is soul food.

What about Nirvana? Didn’t the Buddha sit under that famous tree until he attained it? The Dalai Lama claims that it is indeed possible to eliminate all negative emotions but let us focus on contentment for now.

Toward the end of the book His Holiness discussed meditating on nonconceptuality, “This is not a mere state of dullness, or a blanked-out state of mind. Rather what you should do is, first of all, generate the determination that ‘I will maintain a state without conceptual thoughts," he said. In other words meditation training will eventually be beneficial in ‘stilling the mind.’ He states that at first there will be what feels like a sense of ‘absence’ as we withdraw our focus from the external, but with constant meditative practice we will eventually acquire lucidity and radiance as we learn to recognize the value of the natural state of the mind without fleeting thoughts and as we become adept at this we can remain in this state longer and longer.

It is a journey worth taking. If we let go of outwardly concept and centre on the natural state of mind we can attain nirvana right here and now.

Fun Slideshow

noreply@blogger.com (Paula) — Wed, 10 Sep 2008 08:21:00 +0000

Ever wondered why women live longer than men?

Your Word Is Your Wand

noreply@blogger.com (Paula) — Fri, 05 Sep 2008 04:39:00 +0000

"Handle them carefully, for words have more power than atom bombs." Pearl Strachan Hurd

Words are easy to articulate but have you ever given any thought as to what can result from your words? We use a lot of them every day and usually not a great deal of deliberation precedes them.

The Buddha said, “Words have the power to both destroy and heal. When words are both true and kind, they can change our world.”

Positive words can heal when negative ones can literally kill. Insensitive, unkind words can destroy the human sprit. It does not have to be many words, sometimes only one can cause irrevocable hurt.

The taunt that we have often heard and repeated at school "Sticks and stones can break my bones, but words can never hurt me," is wrong. I believe that in some ways it is possibly easier to recover from physical damage than emotional harm.

Words have great power, both positive and negative. They can wound or heal. A child’s impressionable mind does not appreciate that Mum and Dad are just in a bad mood today, but will identify with derogatory put downs and this could result in long-lasting psychological damage.

The late Florence Scovel Shinn was an artist and metaphysician and has helped thousands of people through her healing work. She was the author of ‘The Game Of Life And How To Play it’ and its sequels ‘The Power Of The Spoken Word’ and ‘Your Word Is Your Wand’.

“A person knowing the power of the word, becomes very careful of his conversation. He has only to watch the reaction of his words to know that do ‘not return void’. Through his spoken word, man is continually making laws for himself," she wrote way back in 1925.

Florence’s message was that words have an enormous power and that God’s gift to man is “power and dominion over all created things; his mind, his body, and affairs… All unhappiness comes from lack of power…by your word you contact this power.”

You can create anything you want by aligning your thoughts and words with the perfect good within.

A lot of us a familiar with ‘The Secret’ and the ‘Law of Attraction’. Whatever is going on in your mind is what you are attracting and the words you speak are confirmation of this. Winston Churchill once said, "You create your own universe as you go along.” The belief here is that your life is the result of all your thoughts, words and actions.

Florence strongly believed in prayer and that once the thoughts and the words are aligned, whatever your request is will come to pass.

One example she used in her writings was of an incident she had while dining with a friend in a restaurant. The lady she was with spilled something on her dress and was sure it would stain. Ms Shin made the statement using the spoken word, “Evil is unreal and leaves no stain.” She then told her friend not to look and to leave the situation to Infinite Intelligence. They took a peek at the dress about an hour later and the stain was gone. She went as far as to claim that if one uses this statement for past misfortunes or mistakes the effects will disappear, leaving no stain.

Another anecdote from Ms Shinn’s book is the story of a man who accidentally misplaced a special Japanese pen called a Namike Pen. He immediately aligned his thoughts to deny the loss by stating, “There is no loss in Divine Mind, therefore I cannot lose the Namike Pen." It will be restored to me or its equivalent.” One day while travelling along Fifth Avenue in a bus, the man’s eye caught a notice in a shop which read ‘Oriental Craft Shop’. He had never been there but developed a strong hunch to go in ask for a Namike Pen and sure enough there was a nice assortment and all on sale! The gentleman in question was probably aware of another of Florence’s teachings in regards to listening and following your intuition. She believed that so many times people find it difficult to stop following the reasoning mind and go along with presentiments.

So we can see our choice of words should be carefully monitored. We can use words to affirm our desires and love or we can use words to hurt and humiliate.

Affirmations are statements, usually positive that are repeated often with a goal in mind such a reprogramming the subconscious belief system. The idea is to use words to affirm our goals and desires and by doing so convincing our subconscious self.

The important thing to remember is that the subconscious is not silly therefore it cannot be fooled. Affirming “I am earning $5000 a month from my blog” when so far you have only made five bucks will only result in the subconscious to respond with “Yeah sure, dream on!” A better affirmation would be, “I choose to earn $5000 a month from my blog” and then take appropriate action in order to achieve that goal, which is where listening carefully to the ‘Inner voice’ or intuition can be very supportive. Makes more sense doesn’t it? It is paramount that the belief system is aligned with the words. If you don’t fully ‘believe’ that you will receive your heart’s desire, the idea is to align your subconscious to have faith that you can at least work toward your objective and in time you can subliminally train your mind to consider the possibility that you will achieve your aspiration.

Florence Scovel Shinn equated words to a magic wand. She said, “Choose the affirmation which appeals to you the most and wave it over the situation which confronts you.”

I believe everything in life is a matter of balance. That is maintaining equilibrium between the conscious, the subconscious and the physical. A perfect of balance of all three areas is what is needed.

Expressing negative verbal statements to children will shape their belief system and this will result in him or her living the negativity.

Analyze the words that you speak every day. Are they disparaging? Are you expressing love when you feel it in your heart? Make a point from now on to be more selective about what you say.

Let love flow from your heart; speak only kind words and the world will be yours.

Affirmations from Florence Scovel Shinn’s ‘Your Word Is Your Wand’

“Nothing is too good to be true”

“Nothing is too wonderful to happen”

“Nothing is too good to last”

Recommended Reading:

•“The Wisdom Of Florence Scovel Shinn" (4 complete books in one volume - The game of life and how to play it - The Power Of The Spoken Word - Your Word Is Your Wand - The Secret Of Success) By Florence Scovel Shinn

•"What You Say is What You Get" by George R. Walthe

Law of Attraction Home Study Course Videos

I am so blessed!

noreply@blogger.com (Paula) — Wed, 03 Sep 2008 07:39:00 +0000

I was feeling unwell the other day and my little 6 year old girl made this for me:

That’s what makes my life worthwhile!
I just had to share.

JUST A MUM?

A woman, renewing her driver's licence,
was asked by the woman at Registry to state her occupation.

She hesitated, uncertain how to classify herself.

'What I mean is, ' explained the woman at Registry,
'do you have a job or are you just a ...?'

'Of course I have a job,' snapped the woman

'I'm a Mum.'

'We don't list 'Mum' as an occupation,
'housewife' covers it,'
Said the recorder emphatically.

I forgot all about her story until one day I found myself
in the same situation.
The Clerk was obviously a career woman, poised,
efficient, and possessed of a high sounding title like,
'Official Interrogator' or 'City Registrar.'

'What is your occupation?' she probed.

What made me say it? I do not know.
The words simply popped out.
'I'm a Research Associate in the field of
Child Development and Human Relations.'

The clerk paused, ball-point pen frozen in midair and
looked up as though she had not heard right.

I repeated the title slowly emphasizing the most significant words.
Then I stared with wonder as my pronouncement was written,
in bold, black ink on the official questionnaire.

'Might I ask,' said the clerk with new interest,
'just what you do in your field?'

Coolly, without any trace of fluster in my voice,
I heard myself reply,
'I have a continuing program of research,
(what mother doesn't)
In the laboratory and in the field,
(normally I would have said indoors and out).
I'm working for my Masters, (first the Lord and then the whole family)
and already have four credits (all daughters).
Of course, the job is one of the most demanding in the humanities,
(any mother care to disagree?)
and I often work 14 hours a day, (24 is more like it).
But the job is more challenging than most run-of-the-mill careers
and the rewards are more of a satisfaction rather than just money.'

There was an increasing note of respect in the clerk's voice as she
completed the form, stood up, and personally ushered me to the door.

As I drove into our driveway, buoyed up by my glamorous new career,
I was greeted by my lab assistants -- ages 13, 7, and 3.
Upstairs I could hear our new experimental model,
(a 6 month old baby) in the child development program,
testing out a new vocal pattern.
I felt I had scored a beat on bureaucracy!
And I had gone on the official records as someone more
distinguished and indispensable to mankind than 'just another Mum.'

Motherhood!

What a glorious career!
Especially when there's a title on the door.
Does this make grandmothers
'Senior Research associates in the field of Child Development and Human Relations'
and great grandmothers
'Executive Senior Research Associates?'
I think so!!!
I also think it makes Aunts '
Associate Research Assistants.'

May your troubles be less,

Your blessing be more,

And nothing but happiness come through your door!

Be kinder than necessary. Everyone you meet is fighting some kind of battle.
You never know when a moment and a few sincere words can have an impact on a life

Author unknown

Rise – An Inspiring Story

noreply@blogger.com (Paula) — Fri, 29 Aug 2008 05:02:00 +0000

I wrote an article a while back called Choice Your Ultimate Freedom The piece is about the control that each of us has over our thoughts and how we always have the choice to decide whether to be happy or not. Since then I came across the story of Ingrid Poulson who is a living case in point of how the spirit can choose to overcome the most tragic circumstances imaginable and go on.

This story is sad and I am sharing it, not to depress but to demonstrate the potency of the human spirit. This tale is about a young woman and a four minute incident that changed everything.

Her father Peter and her two children, four year old Marilyn (‘Malee’) and 23 month old Sebastian (‘Bas’) are her best memories, “My children were loving and beautifully naughty. I would cry with love for them as they slept. Dad was my inspiration. Their lives were so full, so happy. I remember the good. The bad thing that happened to them took only four minutes,” she told ‘The Australian Women’s Weekly’ in an interview published earlier this month. (If you live in Australia you may have read this interview. I have obtained Ingrid’s quotes from there.)

The ‘bad’ thing that Ingrid is referring to occurred on the 15th September 2003 in a suburb west of Sydney, Australia. Her husband Phithak Kongsom (a.ka. Neung) killed her father and her two children by stabbing them and eventually ended his own life after attempting to kill his wife.

Ingrid and Neung separated after she noticed the change from “sweet and mild mannered” to aggressive and controlling. He did not appreciate Ingrid’s independence; she was working and studying at University and he demanded for her to stay at home and take care of the domestic duties, although he spent money they did not have recklessly, such as borrowing $41,000 to buy two motorbikes plunging them into serious debt.

He was served an Apprehended Violence Order in August 2003 which forbade him to loom anywhere near Ingrid and the kids. Up until then Neung had been harassing her with threatening notes and phone calls. He held a knife against Malee’s throat outside her Kindy one day; a far cry from their initial meeting at the American University Alumni Language Center in Chang Mai where Ingrid was teaching English and Neung, a mature aged student in her class, pursued her and begged her to go out with him. “His courting was very romantic,” she says.

They married and moved to Australia where Neung, with his Education Degree had high hopes of obtaining a good job in finance, but did not succeed as his English was not up to the standard required. He took a job as a postman instead.

Their problems began to surface shortly after Bas, their younger child was born. Cultural differences and Neung’s growing anger fuelled their increasing arguments.

The night before the tragedy Neung had shown up at Ingrid’s house brandishing a 30 cm kitchen knife. After tying her to a bed and raping her, he screamed with rage and told her that if she did not return to him he would kill them both. To save her life Ingrid agreed and told him she would return to him providing he found a job, so he left.

The next morning Ingrid phoned the Police to report that Neung had broken the AVO and attacked and threatened her. The officer explained that evidence was required in order to investigate. The Police came to the house and accompanied her to the hospital as to substantiate evidence of the rape. Ingrid left the children with her father Peter.

She inadvertently left her mobile phone behind which caused her dad to answer it when Neung made yet another call. Peter harshly told him to go away and that his daughter had gone to the police. “That was the trigger…”said Ingrid.

When she arrived at the house she discovered her father’s body along with the children’s on the driveway. Her Dad slouched over a broom, the only weapon he could find to protect his grandchildren. Although bleeding from self inflicted wounds Neung lunged toward Ingrid in an attempt to kill her too. She fought him hard until gunfire ceased the struggle. The Police had arrived and were forced to shoot.

Ingrid was physically uninjured and has managed to hold on emotionally and succeed despite her horrible experience. Her mother Janice and sister Rebecca are always by her side whenever she needs them.

Initially she spent a lot of time trying to figure out what would make any human being so disturbed as to commit such horrific acts. Ingrid told the magazine, “…a wise policeman told me, 'Stop searching for an answer. To understand where Neung was, you have to put yourself in that terrible place and you don’t need to go there.’ I thought ‘Thank you.’ I don’t need to visit that place.”

She went through a heart breaking time of grief and guilt and she says the sense of loss was also physical in the early days. The only thing she will always live with is ‘survivor’s guilt' which she feels is a primal way for any parent to feel under similar circumstances.

It is not the first time she has had to endure enormous sorrow. Her brother Adrian committed suicide when she was 21 and at the time she did not cope well. She lost weight by not bothering to eat properly and would drink too much. She decided this time around that was not going to be the way.

Unless you have experienced such grief I guess you can only imagine the agony. What has struck me about this woman, aside from her awful ordeal, is her belief in her own survival. “Events happen despite you, you can’t choose what befalls you. You can control how you respond,” she says. Her favourite aphorism is Aristotle’s “You are what you repeatedly do.”

In due course the “not coping days” dwindled and she began by taking good physical care of her body as she believes that looking after your body helps heal the mind, and made goals for herself to aspire to. From there she decided to have a social life again, travel and allow her best self to shine through. She has resolved to avoid all negativity. All my life my nickname has been ‘Smiley’,” she told ‘The Weekly’, “and, after everything it still is. People smile at me and I don’t know why, until I realise that I’m smiling at them.”

She delights in everyday pleasures such as drinking a good cup of coffee, Coldplay CDs, flowers and giving to others. “Coffee is not something that I just gulp down,” she says, “I savour my daily ritual of sitting in a café and treating myself to a cup. I stockpile every moment and return to it in my mind when I need to. I believe in the extricable link between physical, emotional and mental wellbeing.”

She speaks to her father and his grandchildren everyday and early in the morning she often feels Malee laying beside her in her bed “I hear their laughter …My kids are with me, that’s the only way I can put it…It’s my job to find happiness. The sadness will always be there, I can’t do anything about that, but I have happiness, too, if I choose.” She has promised to honour their lives by living “the happiest and most fulfilling way she can.”

Ingrid Poulson has even found romance again and would not dismiss the idea of having another child. She runs her company called 'Steadfast Training.' The business provides assistance to people dealing with high stress jobs and has now authored a life changing book aptly titled ‘Rise’. She says that it is her story told in a way as to provide self help for people dealing with overwhelming circumstances and grief.

What a gift this woman, who has survived the unimaginable, has given us with her words! Her parents raised her to be a contented optimistic person and, as her mum put it, Ingrid has already had the very worst day of her life and things have to get better from now on.

There is so much we can learn from this tragic story of survival and resilience of the spirit. I will be sure to buy a copy of ‘Rise’. I don’t want the inspiration to end. I wish Ingrid and her family all the very best.

A Gift Of Poetry

I've been tagged!!

noreply@blogger.com (Paula) — Tue, 26 Aug 2008 06:31:00 +0000

I've officially been 'tagged' by Terry at Photography By Terri Harper

Here are the rules:
1. Link to the person who tagged you
2. Post the rules on your blog (this is what you are now reading)
3. Write 6 random things about yourself (see below)
4. Tag 6 people at the end of your post and link to them
5. Let each person know they have been tagged and leave a comment on their blog
6. Let the tagger know when your entry is up

1. I love to write
2. I love all animals especially cats
3. I love coffee
4. I love to read
5. My favourite colour is (you guessed it!) pink
6. I am a morning person

Here are the 6 people I am going to tag.

Elisa
Diary Of An Unlikely Housewife

Tracy
Gotta Roll With The Punches

Lilly
Lilly's Life

Pamela
Swirlbaby

Sandee
Meology

April
Hope For Moms

Is It Friday Yet?

noreply@blogger.com (Paula) — Mon, 25 Aug 2008 02:14:00 +0000

What love means to a 4- 8 year old. Take a look at this cute video:

Differences Between Men and Women. Are We Really From Different Planets?

noreply@blogger.com (Paula) — Fri, 22 Aug 2008 04:51:00 +0000

“Women love cats. Men say they love cats, but when women aren't looking, men kick cats.”

We’ve all heard of the Venus and Mars concept discovered by Dr John Gray about 15 years ago when he authored "Men Are from Mars, Women Are from Venus" which has been published in over 45 languages throughout the world. People sure can relate to his views. I did wonder for a while how could this be. We both have an intelligent brain why can’t he see what I see? The problem, I discovered much later is not that he can’t see; it is that we are just ‘wired’ very differently and instead of fighting our genetic distinctions we should embrace them or we will never get along together. Take a look at this scenario:

I am having a tough day and my computer isn’t working properly. I have just had another ‘freeze’ and lost half of my work. It is very frustrating. So I walk out of my office and go to the lounge where I find him sprawled on the couch watching the football. My eyes are stinging and I am sure I am going to cry.

Lots of thoughts are running through my mind, “Why is this happening to me? I have loads of work to do and the stupid machine is playing up… I haven’t earned any money yet this month … Oh, my, looks at this mess! Why does he not clean it up? I am so tired… Are those the lunch dishes?”

By the time I reach him I am quite emotional and it all comes blurting out, the PC hassles and his lack of domestic discipline. He looks up and says, “Calm down what is your problem?” So he gets another lengthy description of all my ‘problems’. Without a word he gets up and proceeds to clean up the disarray as he hands me a business card. “I know this guy; he should sort your computer out, OK?” He smiles, and once the chores are only half completed he resumes the loafing position in front of the TV. Problems solved right?

Wrong! I am still pretty annoyed and by this time I am crying. He gives me this look, “What the…?” He does not understand he really does not get it. Looking at the situation from his male perspective he has just resolved all my concerns, so why on earth aren’t I happy and let him watch the game in piece?

That is the number one difference between the sexes. I, the female, feeling overwhelmed wanting emotional support first, practical help second. He has no idea what emotional support is, but being a kind soul offers to help as he sees it. I ask again for sensitivity, “Tell me how to do it and I will do it”, he cries. “How can I tell you…GRRR!” I scream as I run out of the room leaving my partner scratching his head wondering how on earth he can make things right again and why he’ll never understand women.

The point is that we are inherently different and no one is good or bad, just not the same. We often forget that and therefore have expectations of each other that will never be met. Here is a list of differences between men and women. They are generalizations and there are of course exceptions to every rule:

• Why is it that if a man is cooking dinner and the phone rings he cannot do both things at the same time? Even if the phone does not ring there’s a chance that the whole meal will not be ready at the same time. It is the lack of the ‘multitasking gene’ in the male species. We can cook, talk on the phone, wipe Johnny’s nose and check our emails all at once. I know, girls, it is beyond us why the guys can’t do it, but trust me the boys just don’t have the same genetic material.

• This brings me to the ‘mechanical gene’. Yes guys rightly so. We girls do not generally posses the ability to put the vacuum cleaner back together again after we have taken it apart let alone differentiate components of an engine; nor do we want to.

• Men speak short sentences. Women speak monologues. In “The Female Mind” by Dr Luan Brizendine it says that women devote more brain cells to talking than men and that women talk almost three times as much as men. Ladies churn out around 20,000 words a day compared to men’s 13,000. According to Dr Brizendine’s book females speak a lot more quickly, like to hear the sound of their own voices and devote more brain cells to talking. The book goes as far to compare the rush women get when they are talking to that felt by a heroin addict.

• Women are just so much more emotional "Women have an eight-lane superhighway for processing emotion, while men have a small country road," says Dr Brizendine.

• “He does not listen!” Another finding by Dr Brizendine is that testosterone reduces the size of the section of the brain required for hearing resulting in the lack of attention women receive from men, This is also explains why men don’t enjoy a good chat like women do.

• When they are troubled women want a shoulder, nodding sympathy and a good whinge. Men offer practical solutions only.

• Women are just more 'interested'. My partner comes home and announces as a matter of fact, “Sam and Wendy are separating.” I say in alarmed surprise, "Oh no! What happened?” to which he replies, “Dunna know.” I say, "He’s your best friend did you not ask him? Is he ok?” To this he states, “Sure if he wasn’t he would say so.” Noticing my concern he decides to visit Sam and upon his arrival hands him a beer and sits next to him in front of the TV and not a word is spoken until one of them gets up, goes to the refrigerator, turns to the other and asks, “Want another one?” and that is it! No shoulder or sympathetic comforting. A woman on the other hand would have been talking it over on the phone for a good three hours even before the best friend arrived with chocolate, wine, tissues and lots of time.

• Women need to talk over problems. Men do not. Women expect men to be like their girlfriends and discuss issues at length. Women feel good talking about problems. Dr John Gray says, “If a guy started to talk about his concerns to a bunch of guys he would be shunned as the reaction would be, ‘Why would you want to talk about problems? That would bring everyone down!’ Guys seem to think that the way to bring a woman up is to go down with her”.

• Women can use sex as a weapon as it is what men want. We all know most females need to have emotions with sex, whereas most men can make do with just the physical.

• Women tend to think about consequences before taking unnecessary risks, men are generally more ‘act now, think later.’

• Girls start to outgrow toys as they approach their teens. Men do not.

• Unlike women men do not like to admit they have made a mistake or ask for directions.

• Men use the phone for short communications. Women love talking on the phone for hours even if they have just returned from that person’s house half an hour ago.

• To a woman a shed is an ugly looking makeshift building to store things in. To a man it is his sanctuary. (Go figure!)

• When a man decides to go out, he is ready. A woman needs at least an hour’s notice (minimum!)

• A woman’s shelf in the bathroom has 255 different shaped of bottles on it. A man has just 1 bottle of aftershave.

• A man can go away for a week and take only hand luggage on the plane. A woman requires a suitcase she had to sit on in order to zip up, plus an empty one to bring the shopping home and of course the hand luggage would be full.

• For most women there is no such thing as a one night stand but the start of 'something'.

• Men can sleep through vacuum cleaners, stereos and babies screaming. Women wake up just before the baby starts to cry.

• Men go to the bathroom alone and do not speak to other males while quickly doing the business. For women it is a social event and a chance to have a good gossip away from the guys.

• Women make a lot of decisions and have the skill to make a man think he is in charge at all times.

There. I feel better now that I have expressed how I feel; after all it is emotionally challenging to express these concerns… Guys! Guys are you paying attention? And YOU, yes YOU, why do you have your hands over your ears singing La…La... La… And YOU... I do wish you would let go of the remote while you are asleep.

This is an Italian short film called Men VS Women - The Differences check it out, it’s cute: