Chasing Empty Pavements

Something new...something I've never done before!

2012-02-02T12:17:00.000-06:00

I'm doing something I've never really done on this blog...talk specifics about my writing/novels. I've always felt like it was too intimate or maybe I thought I was pushing my luck talking about it. But among the many changes over the last two years, I've started to really put myself out there with my writing and what not. Anyways, the point of this post is that I would like to take a minute to introduce you to the main character in my new novel...but this isn't JUST a character...it's a character based on a real man...my grandfather :) I adore history and learning about family history and my grandfather just happens to have one of the most extraordinary life stories. We're an extremely tight knit family and what better way to honor his memory than to base a character off of him. I wanted to share just a few photos of him, especially the one's that have brought out so much inspiration for my novel. Enjoy :)

My grandfather was a twin...look at those outfits!

WWII Veteran...received a purple heart. He was an extremely brave and courageous man!

Grandpa looking all studly!

Grandpa and Grandma in the beginning

This was taken a few years before his death in 2010.

I always knew I wanted to honor my grandfather someday, but I knew I wouldn't be able to write the story until I was ready. But I'm ready now.

Here's to you Gramps!

The Fault in Our Stars by John Green Review

2012-01-30T14:11:00.002-06:00

It took me several days of really letting my feelings and emotions sink in after reading this book. I knew from the get-go that I was going to love this book because it's written by John Green and I adore him. I had no doubt that this was going to be a book that I raved about, however, I did not realize that it would quickly shoot to the top of my favorites pile. I didn't think it was possible to love any of John Green's books more than I loved Looking for Alaska, but this book was simply amazing.

**DISCLAIMER**The review I'm doing now will be similar to my other reviews in form however, this book required a bit more delving and analysis for me. So you should only read this review if A. you've already read the book and want to know how I felt about specific moments in the book B. If you don't plan on reading the book but are interested in what I have to say about it or C. You hated the book and want to know why someone loved it so much.

Again do not read any further if you don't want to read spoilers. This review has many of them!

The Fault in Our Stars by John Green Review

This is a very emotional and intimate review of this book. Not only am I pouring my heart into this review, but using my English Major skills to delve in-‐depth. I hope that by reading this, you understand that some of my opinions may not be your own, but I do not mean to offend. So without further ado:

This book was a plethora of feelings. When the characters were happy, so was I. When they cried, my cheeks were wet as well. This book was a rollercoaster of emotions and I intend to tell you why. I’m breaking this down mainly by page number so I can give you a play by play of my thoughts.

Pg. 10-‐ “Boys do not have a monopoly on the Staring Business after all.” Says by Hazel when she discovers the deliciously sexy Augustus staring at her. I love this line because 1. It shows right away that this book will have some great writing in it. I felt this overwhelming sense of calm after I read this line because I automatically knew I would not have to worry about the quality of writing.

Pg. 12-‐ Witty exchange about blindness between Issac and Gus is a great start to me, this shows that the characters have a maturity yet child-‐like way to look at their diseases. They are obviously hiding behind a level of sarcasm to mask the fear, but it’s also their way of detaching themselves from their cancer and not letting it get to them. It takes a lot of talent to be able to do this, to not be completely serious about the fact that you have a disease that could kill you at any moment.

Pg. 16-‐ The “Literal” exchange between Hazel and Gus. Not only is it funny because it’s something I would have thought/said but it’s cute, witty and shows intimately why they should like each other and how well they fit together. It’s this cynical, sarcastic voice in Green’s characters that make me come back for more. **I love that he calls her Hazel Grace even though at first she doesn’t want him too. I suspect it grows on her in the endearing sense, just like it grows on the readers.

Speaking of characters... There is so much I want to say on this topic. I have read literally hundreds of reviews, most raving but some not about John Green’s books and Fault in our stars in particular. A lot of people have mentioned their problems with his characters. My adoration with his characters is two-‐fold and happens to go

against the complaints people had about them. Firstly, one of the reasons I read John Green’s books are for his characters because they are so much like my friends and I. I do not mean to sound overly confident or prejudicial here, but his characters are intelligent, well spoken and often more mature than their other literary counterparts. Some people think that this makes them.... un-‐realistic or un-‐relatable. I disagree. My friends and I spoke very much like Miles, Alaska, Hazel and Gus. We did make quips like “literal” Jesus remarks and talk with vocabulary that was way above the norm for our age and grade. That’s because that’s just who we were. I, in particular, did not get along with the masses. I was reading Gone with the Wind in fourth grade, Stephen King novels when I was 11 or 12. I didn’t fit into the cliché crowds in elementary, middle school or even high school. By the time I could have gotten away with being in a “crowd” per se, I was already graduated early, working two jobs and taking college classes. I didn’t fit in later in life, because I didn’t want to. I had no desire too. This is one reason why Green’s characters speak to me. They remind me so much of myself, and I love THAT. Secondly, I believe there are two types of well-‐written-‐true-‐to-‐form Young Adult characters out there. The first type of character is one that is very much a realistic, walking, talking, and breathing caricature of a teenager. These are the types of characters that when I’m finished reading about, I will often praise the author for creating such a valid and realistic character. I respect and appreciate this type of character. The second type is the kind of character that 80% replicates a “normal” teenager but than there is something about them that sets them just a bit above the “norm” for a teenager. For example-‐ Katniss from Hunger Games. Strip away the plot, her talents, the game and the situation and you have a mostly normal teenager. Her personality though, BECAUSE of the plot, her talents etc, place her above that “norm” for a teenager. Same with Hazel and Gus in Fault in our Stars. For the most part, both of them are hormonal, technology driven, smart-‐ass teenagers. But their situations, their illness and their personalities catapult them just above what is “normal” for teenagers. For me, I LOVE reading about these types of characters. One, because as I pointed out earlier, some of their personality traits that differ from the “normal” teenage characters happen to relate to me, but mostly I love reading about these characters BECAUSE they are different than the “norm.” Honestly, if I want to read a book about a cliché mean girl, or a typical high school romance or a coming of age story featuring a stereotypical teenager, I don’t need to look far. I can look around in my own community and find those stories or I can just pick up one of the millions of famous YA books. But to find a story about a girl who is learning to accept her fate with cancer, fall in love cautiously and realize that it may or may not be all it’s cracked up to be is an entirely different ball game. Sometimes people (especially Young Adults) NEED to read books that have characters that possess personalities, talents, skills or situations that aren’t in the “norm,” or aren’t typical. It’s an escape, a learning experience, and a way to enlighten.

Pg. 16. “I mean, particularly given that, as you so deliciously pointed out, all of this will end in oblivion and everything.” Love this line from Augustus. This is the line that clues me into the fact that he’s intelligent and well spoken.

Pg. 17 “His every syllable flirted.” Wonderful way to show flirtation.

Pg. 19 What is a Hamartia? And I love that it’s a word I don’t know, but now I do, and I love it and I love that John Green put it in the book knowing that most people wouldn’t know what it meant and they’d have to look it up.

Pg. 20 “You put the killing thing right between your teeth, but you don’t give it the power to do it’s killing.”

I love this metaphor. It’s so simple and symbolic. This hits me hard, personally because it reminds me of what I tell myself when I struggle with my hodophobia. But really it can speak to anything that you fear. Because when you confront the thing that you are afraid of or that you believe can or is killing you and you literally and physically have control over it killing or scaring you, it’s the ultimate comfort. The ultimate sense of power. That you can control the thing that you are so frightened of, the thing you believe can kill you. I absolutely adore this. Now, I’ve read a few reviews that said that this metaphor was stupid and while that is their opinion, I disagree. I think it’s brilliant, but I’ve also read a couple reviews where they said in the case of Gus and the cigarettes, this metaphor is hypocritical. Because Gus is basically saying, “I’m going to buy these cigarettes and put them between my lips and they have the power to kill me, but because I don’t light them, or give them the power to kill me, they lose their power” yet he purchased the cigarettes nonetheless giving the cigarette companies the money they need to continue to sell them to people who WILL light the cigarettes to give them the power to kill. I don’t necessarily disagree with this logic, HOWEVER, I don’t believe EVERYTHING in a novel needs to be analyzed to mush and I think this is kind of overreaching. Sometimes a simple metaphor is a simple metaphor and you need to enjoy it for it is and not overreach and over analyze the shit out of something. If you do that with the entire novel, with all the lines, I doubt any book is going to be that enjoyable. Plus...it ruins it for the rest of us who were able to take what he’d written and enjoy it for the simple meaning we gleaned from it.

Pg. 29-‐ I love that we see Gus here in his teenage boy form. Even though Hazel has cancer and even though Gus has had cancer, he still has his male hormones.

Pg. 31-‐ I adore these lines from Hazel. Her reasoning is why Green’s romance between

characters feels so real. Because she names things, real things, things that REALLY do make you fall in love with someone. Not just the stereotypical things. Not to mention that I love the way Green wrote Hazel’s voice and the lines are just so beautifully, skillfully written. “I liked the way his story ended with someone else. I liked his voice. I liked that he took existentially fraught free throws. I liked that he was tenured professor in the Department of Slightly Crooked Smiles with a dual appointment in the Department of Having a Voice That Made My Skin Feel More Like Skin.” (Okay. Seriously. This. Line. Is. Brilliant. Instead of having Hazel vaguely speak about how he makes her feel “tingly” or the fact that he turns he on, this very specific line of Made My Skin Feel More Like Skin so so so beautiful and true)

Pg. 33 Hazel’s sentiments about her favorite books is spot on! These sentiments are EXACTLY how I feel about my favorite books. She completely nails is. Either you love the book so much, you just want to share it with the world and want everyone you know to read it and feel the same exact way or you love it so much, you don’t want to share because it’s YOURS. It’s so intimately and tangibly affected you in places it’s hard to explain and in a selfish way, you don’t want anyone else to have those feelings about it.

Pg. 34 “I am going to read this terrible book with the boring title that does not contain stormtroopers.” LOVE this line! Little one liners like these make me realize how adorable Augustus is and how much I wish he was a REAL boy I knew.

Pg. 40 “I take quite a lot of pride in not knowing what’s cool.” HA! I like this line because it’s totally true to me and something I would say.

Pg. 45. “I was just choosing among truths.” Great way to put this. We so often forget that sometimes there is more than one version of the “truth” and we often justify choosing which “truth” we tell people.

Pg. 51-‐52 It makes my heart swoon that Gus reads An Imperial Affliction for Hazel. It’s such a simple thing to do for someone, yet it yields such a huge reaction simply because he did it FOR her. And he ends up enjoying it and that brings them closer.

Pg. 63 “That’s the thing about pain,” Augustus said, and then glanced back at me. “It demands to be felt.” Ugh, I LOVE this sentiment because it’s so true. Love and Pain seem to be the strongest of emotions... at least for me personally and I totally understand this. There are just times when the pain of something is so incredibly intense...there is nothing else to do BUT feel it.

Pg. 66 “I have been wanting to call you on a nearly minutely basis, but I have been waiting until I could form a coherent thought in re An Imperial Affliction.” (He said “in re.” He really did. That boy.) First off, this is how I felt after reading THIS book. Secondly, I agree with Hazel’s adoration of his use of “in re” and I just all together freaking love this line. It’s perfect. I love that Augustus admits he’s been thinking about her, that he’s actually read the book, that the book actually gave him things to think about and that he wants to share those thoughts will Hazel all in a matter of a sentence. THIS is why I adore John Green.

Pg. 72 “Caroline is no longer suffering from personhood.” What a lovely way to say someone has died. Ha!

Pg. 73 “Maybe okay will be our always.” What a simplistic, wonderful thing. I love that Green plays this out throughout the ENTIRE novel. It isn’t just a sentiment that is said and then forgotten, it ripples through to the end and I loved that he did this.

Pg. 83 “They were aggressively orange” Beautiful! What a great way to describe a color!

Pg. 99 This exchange between Hazel and her mother shows a glimpse into what it’s like to be a teenager with cancer...sometimes both the parents AND the kid forget that once in a while it’s unavoidable that they will act angsty and “teenagery.” It’s actually a GOOD thing to see that once in a while. It reminds them of where they’re at in life and just how far they’ve come.

Pg. 103 “Really,” my dad said. “I wouldn’t bullshit you about this. If you were more trouble than you’re worth, we’d just toss you out on the streets.”

“We’re not sentimental people,” Mom added, deadpan. “We’d leave you at an orphanage with a note pinned to your pajamas.”

LOVE this. This is something my parents would say to me in this situation. Needed comic relief with a loving tone. Perfect.

Pg 123 “Lonely, Vaguely Pedophilic Swing Set Seeks the Butts of Children,” I said. He laughed. “That’s why.” “What?” “That’s why I like you. Do you realize how rare it is to come across a hot girl who creates an adjectival version of the word pedophile? You are so busy being you that you have no idea how utterly unprecedented you are.” I love this exchange but I particularly love the last line. It’s so telling of both Augustus and Hazel. Again, this is an aspect of falling in love that is so rarely shown in Young Adult fiction, and I adore Augustus for his reasons of falling in love with Hazel. In fact, it is what makes me, the reader, fall in love with her as well.

Pg. 125. My FAVORITE line in the entire book is so simplistically beautifully, such a wonderful way of describing love, a perfect metaphor. “As he read, I fell in love the way you fall asleep: slowly, and then all at once.”

Pg. 134-‐135. The exchange between Isaac and Hazel really resonates with me, because we so often pity the people with cancer, illness or disease and even though I do not condone someone leaving their significant other because of cancer, illness etc, I also think we forget to think about how THEY feel. How it affects THEM. Because cancer and illness do not just make life complete hell for the victim, but also for family, friends, significant others etc. I think Hazel speaks a very blunt truth when she says, “I’m not saying it’s your fault, I’m saying it’s not nice.”

The whole conversation about the eggs being “ghettoized” to a breakfast item. I know when I read some reviews, many people said this irritated them because it really was irrelevant to the book and it was unnecessary and completely a waste of a few pages. I happened to enjoy it very much. I liked that for a moment we got to see Hazel in her ponderous state, not talking about cancer or Augustus or anything pertaining to the book’s subject matter. I also happen to agree with her stance on eggs and it’s ghettotization.

Pg. 141 “It felt pretty amazing to walk unencumbered like that, stepping across the Rubicon, the machine’s silence acknowledging that I was, however briefly, a nonmetallicized creature.” This line isn’t just crafted perfectly, but it serves as a reminder to me not only as a reader, but as a person as to how much we take for granted. I recently just went through an airplane and proceeded to bitch and complain about security and the stupid machines. But you know what? I shouldn’t have complained because I got to go through the machine without the alarms going off because I don’t have any piece of metal keeping me together. I got to go through the machine without my lungs depriving me of oxygen. We forget how utterly amazing it may feel for someone to enjoy a moment that they usually never get to experience or may never experience in their life again.

Pg. 141 “My lungs felt like they were folding in upon themselves like flowers at dusk.” Beautifully heartbreaking.

Pg. 145 “Easy comfort isn’t comforting,” I said. OMG. This is brilliant and so true. We all THINK we want the easiest comfort, and we certainly expect people to say the easiest, most comforting thing...but if you really think about it...does it make you feel any better? It sure doesn’t for me. This is what she means. It’s a façade, a false comfort and we all know that falsity isn’t comforting at all.

Pg. 153. This is where I utterly fell in love with Augustus Waters. “I’m in love with you, and I’m not in the business of denying myself the simple pleasure of saying true things. I’m in love with you, and I know that love is just a shout into the void, and that oblivion is inevitable, and that we’re all doomed and that there will come a day when all our labor has been returned to dust, and I know the sun will swallow the only earth we’ll ever have, and I am in love with you.” I adore this admittance of love so very much. He is putting his heart on the line without being overly cheesy but being completely truthful. And he is absolutely right that love, and admitting your love doesn’t exactly do any much good because we’ll all die eventually but yet he feels it is dire that he tells Hazel how he feels. So amazing. I also love that Hazel does not return the sentiment at that exact moment. That would be too easy, too clichéd. Sometimes, it really does take one person a little bit longer to realize and verbalize their feelings. Another way that John Green’s characters feel so ALIVE to me.

Pg. 157. The cab driver has an uncannily true view of freedom and sin. I love it.

“Some tourists think Amsterdam is a cit of sin, but in truth it is a city of freedom. And in freedom, most people find sin.” Oh my god! Why did I not think of it like this before? When I think about it, it’s such a true statement.

Pg. 168-‐ Gus’s look at dying is something I, myself have thought about. I see where he is coming from with dying for a greater good, leaving behind a legacy that means something. I think a lot of people think about dying like this. I mean, who hasn’t thought about their own death and what kind of impression they’d leave behind. But I also see where Hazel is coming from when she is kind of offended by this thought

because really, not everyone IS going to die a great, heroic death and why should people glamourize the deaths of cancer patients? Doesn’t someone who accidently fell down the stairs to their death deserve just as much reverie for their deaths? People think that just because someone has cancer, they are automatically put upon this pedestal...not to say that they don’t deserve it...because a lot of the times they do...but I really, truly believe in the old adage “everyone you meet is fighting their own battle.” I don’t believe that one person’s death is more or less important than the next persons. We all are just skating through life trying to do the best we can...some are just given the opportunity to make it better than others. I think Augustus touches on this later in the book as well.

Pg. 171 “I hadn’t realized he’d thought about the book so much, that An Imperial Affliction mattered to Gus independently of me mattering to him.” This is such a self-‐epiphany moment. It’s something I’d like to think that I would come to realize someday. It’s true though. We get involved with someone we love and we inevitably share the things we love and hate with them, and then some of those “things” kind of morph into their “things” too and suddenly they’ve found something they love just as dearly, because of you, but also independently of you as well. Brilliant.

Pg. 173. Augustus nails it when he talks about his experiences with Caroline. It kind of goes back to my statement about cancer and dying. But when he says, “The thing about dead people,” he said and then stopped himself. “The thing is you sound like a bastard if you don’t romanticize them, but the truth is...complicated, I guess. Like, you are familiar with the trope of the stoic and determined cancer victim who heroically fights her cancer with inhuman strength and never complains or stops smiling even at the very end, etcetera?”

“But really, I mean aside from us obviously, cancer kids are not statistically more likely to be awesome or compassionate or perseverant or whatever. Caroline was always moody and miserable, but I liked it. She was...I mean, to be honest, she was a bitch. But you can’t say that, because she had this tumor, and also she’s, I mean, she’s dead. And she had plenty of reason to be unpleasant, you know?” This is some pretty heavy shit, if you know what I mean. And it’s incredibly observant and truthful for a teenage boy to have to have knowledge of, but God it’s true. From personal experience, and talking to people with personal experience, it’s so difficult to idolize someone with cancer when they are moody, mean and quite frankly, a nasty person. But society and other people look down on you if you say it out loud, like, you have no right to say that about them, because God forbid, they are fighting cancer. And I get it. I really do. It sucks, it’s shitty, and they do have right to be an ass, but at the same time...dude... If I’m by your side, taking care of you, watching you die, LOVING you while you die, I have a right to be unpleasant too. I have a right to say that your unpleasantness is unwarranted and uncool. I have always been off the mind set that just because something happens to you, or consumes you...it shouldn’t DEFINE you. I was a victim of abuse, and it’s always going to be a part of my life but it does NOT define who I am. I will not allow it too. Therefore, I really have no place to be a bitch to

someone and use the abuse I suffered as an excuse. It’s kind of the same way I feel about cancer.

Pg. 189-‐ “Some infinities are bigger than other infinities.” Hmm...a very though-‐ provoking line.

Pg. 202 “Our fearlessness shall be our secret weapon,” I said. Isn’t that the most powerful weapon someone can use? Being fearless in the face of danger is an utterly powerful weapon to have. You can almost defeat anyone with that alone.

By page 215 I was bawling like a baby and cried especially hard during this passage.

“And then he broke down, just for one moment, his sob roaring impotent like a clap of thunder unaccompanied by lightning, the terrible ferocity that amateurs in the field of suffering might mistake for weakness.” Ugh. I HATE seeing Men/Boys cry because it’s like they just have this tough outer shell and to see them cry makes me want to cry and I can just imagine this scene and it’s so unbelievably sad.

Pg. 217. This line really reinforces Gus’s way of thinking about death “Because there is no glory in illness. There is no meaning to it. There is no honor in dying of.” In a sense he is right. There is glory in dying FOR by usually not in dying OF.

Pg. 223 “I thought being an adult meant knowing what you believe, but that has not been my experience.” What an honest thing to say. I admire her dad for this. Adults, especially because dad’s are so prone to acting tough and having all the answers. But its extremely difficult to admit that you are just as clueless as an adult as you were when you were a teenager or child.

Pg.237 “Eventually we fell asleep like that, a quantum entanglement of tubes and bodies.” Beautifully written image.

The scene with Gus and his malfunctioning G-‐Tube is devastatingly sad. I can understand why he did it. He’s at that point where he just wants to be in control again. Wants to feel like there is one thing in his life that he can do without his cancer interfering. Sad.

Pg. 252 “his dad put an arm around me and kissed the side of my head and whispered, “ I thank God for you every day kid.” This gave me goosebumps. It’s such a sad and heartbreaking thing to say because his dad really knows how much their love has meant to Gus.

Issac’s eulogy that he gives to Gus and Hazel had me in complete tears. It was witty, sarcastic and totally loving. It made me miss Gus before he was even gone.

When Augustus died, so did a part of my heart. Hazel’s pain became my pain and I could feel how terrible it hurt the heart. I also understand why she was so upset with Van Houten came to Gus’s funeral spouting shit about the ending and how sorry he was.

Pg. 290 “I took out my cannula so I could smell better, breathing him in and breathing him out, the scent fading even as I lay there, my chest burning until I couldn’t distinguish among the pains.” What a heartbreaking image. I imagine at this point, it would be difficult to ascertain which pain was stronger...the physicality of her lungs or the loss of Gus.

Gus’s letter to Van Houten was a spectacular ending to the novel and made me cry the hardest. His letter is full of great insightful lines.

Pg. 311 “The marks humans leave are too often scars.”

“My thoughts are stars I can’t fathom into constellations.”

“Hazel is different. She walks lightly, old man.”

“Hazel knows the truth: We’re as likely to hurt the universe as we are to help it, and we’re not likely to do either.”

“A desert blessing, an ocean curse.”

“You don’t get to choose if you get hurt in this world, old man, but you do have some say in who hurts you. I like my choices. I hope she likes hers.”

The line of “I do, Augustus. I do” is a GREAT last line. Miles from Looking for Alaska would certainly love it. I love that this ending is both hopeful and sad. I like it. Mostly, I was sad the book was over. I wanted to keep being a voyeur in Hazel’s world. So with all my rambling and commenting page by page, I’d guess you say that I freaking LOVED this book. If you could tell how passionate I am about this novel, than you should probably go get the book and read it. Right now. Seriously. RIGHT NOW.

The End.

Oh yeah... and I give this book A freaking PLUS.

In My Mailbox (25)

2012-01-29T19:19:00.001-06:00

Bought:

None :)

Review:

Won:

Thanks Ron Nieto @ Stories of My Life!!

Library:

None :)

What did YOU get in your mailbox this week?

Blogging Vacation

2012-01-20T05:30:00.000-06:00

Hi lovely followers! I just wanted to let you all know that I will not be able to post anything for about a week as I am going here:

I am SOOO excited! I get an entire week to lay on the beach, rest my mind and body, read books, play in the water, soak up the sun and be with family and friends!!! After working full time and graduating this past semester, I feel it is MUCH deserved!

Coincidentally, I opened up my Kindle up to start a new book and I randomly chose a new book purely based on it's cover. ( I know...isn't that what we're NOT supposed to do?) Well it happened to be this one:

Just read the summary for it and you will know how ironic it is that I just happened to pick this book out of the HUNDREDS on my kindle:

From the author of How the Garcia Girls Lost Their Accents comes this tale of courage and sisterhood set in the Dominican Republic during the rise of the Trujillo dictatorship. A skillful blend of fact and fiction, In the Time of the Butterflies is inspired by the true story of the three Mirabal sisters who, in 1960, were murdered for their part in an underground plot to overthrow the government. Alvarez breathes life into these historical figures--known as "las mariposas," or "the butterflies," in the underground--as she imagines their teenage years, their gradual involvement with the revolution, and their terror as their dissentience is uncovered.

Alvarez's controlled writing perfectly captures the mounting tension as "the butterflies" near their horrific end. The novel begins with the recollections of Dede, the fourth and surviving sister, who fears abandoning her routines and her husband to join the movement. Alvarez also offers the perspectives of the other sisters: brave and outspoken Minerva, the family's political ringleader; pious Patria, who forsakes her faith to join her sisters after witnessing the atrocities of the tyranny; and the baby sister, sensitive Maria Teresa, who, in a series of diaries, chronicles her allegiance to Minerva and the physical and spiritual anguish of prison life.
In the Time of the Butterflies is an American Library Association Notable Book and a 1995 National Book Critics Circle Award nominee.

Crazy right?! I had no clue the book was about the Dominican Republic until I started reading it and the character mentioned one of the cities we will be in! I'm hoping that's a really good sign....

Hope you all have a wonderful week and I will see you back in February!!

Revealing Eden by Victoria Foyt Review

2012-01-19T10:17:00.001-06:00

Revealing Eden by Victoria Foyt was quite the adventure. I also have a new appreciation for jungle animals due to this book :) Goodreads Summary says:

Eden Newman must mate before her 18th birthday in six months or she'll be left outside to die in a burning world. But who will pick up her mate-option when she's cursed with white skin and a tragically low mate-rate of 15%? In a post-apocalyptic, totalitarian, underground world where class and beauty are defined by resistance to an overheated environment, Eden's coloring brands her as a member of the lowest class, a weak and ugly Pearl. If only she can mate with a dark-skinned Coal from the ruling class, she'll be safe. Just maybe one Coal sees the Real Eden and will be her salvation her co-worker Jamal has begun secretly dating her. But when Eden unwittingly compromises her father's secret biological experiment, she finds herself in the eye of a storm and thrown into the last area of rainforest, a strange and dangerous land. Eden must fight to save her father, who may be humanity's last hope, while standing up to a powerful beast-man she believes is her enemy, despite her overwhelming attraction. Eden must change to survive but only if she can redefine her ideas of beauty and of love, along with a little help from her "adopted aunt" Emily Dickinson.

The Good: I loved that Foyt flipped an old idea and turned into something new and fresh. Eden who is a "Pearl" (she is white) and everyone hates the Pearls. Her only chance at making it in this dystopian world of hers is if she mates with a "Coal" (someone who is black). This is the first time I've read a novel that switches that dynamic. Instead of the normal historical stories I read about oppressed black people, this book propels them as the most powerful people in this society. I think Foyt did this wonderfully! I liked that their were some realistic aspects to the story as well as the fantastical. It took me awhile, but Eden, the main character eventually grew on me. I thought the romance was done well and I can't wait for Part Two to come out!

The Bad: While Eden did grow on me, in the beginning she was a bit annoying and whiny. Some of her inner monologue got a bit lengthy and unnecessary. I also am still on the fence about Bramford...just not sure what I think about his whole one-minute-I'm-nice-then-the-next-I'm-not kind of attitude.

Overall: I enjoyed this novel and was impressed by Miss Foyt's ability to find a fresh and unique idea for Dysptopian novels in the ever-growing genre. If you like adventure and a bit of romance mixed in with Dystopia than this is the novel for you! I give it a B!

**I received this book free from the publisher in exchange for an honest review. All the opinions are my own and I was not obligated to write a favorable review.

In My Mailbox (24)

2012-01-15T05:30:00.000-06:00

Bought:

Review:

Thank you Sand Dollar Press!!

Kindle Steals N Deals:

*Lots of GREAT free books this past week! I can't believe how many were free!

Library:

What did YOU all get this week?!

In which I rant about an article that bashes YA writers

2012-01-12T15:13:00.001-06:00

While thoroughly procrastinating on my editing, I came across an article written by a Alexander Nazaryan. In this article which you can read here, talks specifically about Walter Dean Myers. The author of this article was apparently a teacher (after reading this article, I'm not sure I would ever want to be one of his students or ever have a child of mine be his student) and while he appreciates Myers for opening up his students to the idea of reading he says about Myers,

"While his own story is inspiring, his books are insipid. Myers’ books, are painfully mundane, with simple moral lessons built into predictable situations: the projects, prison, redemption."

He then says that books are not meant for entertainment...only to "elevate" the reader. His exact words are,

"Because I am an unashamed, unapologetic believer that the purpose of literature is to elevate. Not to entertain, to problematize or to instruct, but to take what Hamlet called our “unweeded garden” and revel in its thorns. Not to make the world pretty, but to make it true, and by making it true, make it beautiful. All real art is high art."

Okay, so then the rest of his article is basically explaining how students should be mandated to read more of the classics and less of the YA literature. My take? I understand what he is saying about students needing to read more classic literature. Sure, I can agree with that point. But in his clearly, arrogant way, he is saying that students should not just read more classic literature but forget the YA literature because it's not teaching them anything. It's not "elevating" them, it's simply "entertaining" them. Which I think is a bunch of horse shit. I have been reading everything from YA literature, classics, horror, literary fiction, foreign fiction and you know what? I've learned massive amounts of things from ALL of them. In fact, I've probably learned more and been "elevated" more with the genres other than the classics. It really pisses me off that people harp and bitch about kids not reading when I think the younger generation is doing a helluva job. Reading is making a huge comeback and a majority of that is owed to the YA writers.

So I just wanted to rant about how ridiculous I think this article is and I wanted all of the YA readers and writers out there to know that you ARE appreciated, you ARE doing something wonderful and there ARE millions of people everyday who are gaining something by reading YA. So thank you.

Excitement all around!

2012-01-10T08:18:00.001-06:00

So today is a pretty exciting day, because lots of little things are making me extremely happy.

First and foremost- The Fault in Our Stars by my favorite author John Green came out today!! Happy Release Day! It will be sitting on my doorstep when I get home today!

Secondly and Thirdly mixed together- I'm starting intensive editing on my MS that is so poorly titled right now BLIND ACCIDENTS. ( Btw...is anyone around here good at titles? I'm awful at them and I hate coming up with them.) But not only am I doing intensive edits... I'm doing it on my new Macbook Air which my wonderful fiance provided me. I'm in heaven with this computer. I seriously want to sit on it all day long and write. I just FEEL like a writer when I'm on it, not to mention that Scrivener works a lot better on a Mac than a windows computer. I'm both really excited and nervous about these edits. I so badly want it to be good enough to submit to agents and publishers. I could ramble on for hours about my insecurities but right now I'm on a happy high from good feelings that I will not do that.

Lastly, a vacation to the Dominican Republic is coming up and I'm so excited to be able to actually take a breather from things and RELAX. It's going to be glorious!!

Well that's my happy day post, I hope you all are having a fabulous day with your own happy day things!!

If I Tell by Janet Gurtler Review

2012-01-09T05:30:00.000-06:00

This book was one of those books where I enjoyed it half the time and hated it the other half. There were some parts that I thought were done so well and then there were some things that I thought were kind of off base. Goodreads Summary:

Jasmine Evans knows one thing for sure... people make mistakes. After all, she is one. Jaz is the result of a onenight stand between a black football player and a blonde princess. Having a young mother who didn't raise her, a father who wants nothing to do with her and living in a small-minded town where she's never fit in hasn't been easy. But she's been surviving. Until she sees her mom's new boyfriend making out with her own best friend. When do you forgive people for being human or give up on them forever?

The Good: I think Gurtler has a talent in nailing the language, thoughts and actions of older teenagers. I felt that the characters in this novel were so familiar, so easy to relate to and that is because they so closely resemble teenagers in real life. I always appreciate that authenticity in YA novels, especially contemporary novels. Also the fact that I've been reading a lot of YA Paranomral/Fantasy/Dystopian books lately made the change to contemporary really refreshing. I also thought the issues Gurtler tackles are some that are so important to YA audiences and some of the moral questions brought up were great for what I call "after-reading-thinking." The race issue was obviously one of the biggest issues Gurtler tackles in this novel but it's not always the most important. I thought it was interesting to see Jaz's transformation of her way of thinking and her self-esteem and trust were more interesting and important to focus on! I really thought the big issues that Jaz faces with the *secret* she keeps from her mother is fascinating. I can't help but wonder what I would do if I was in the same situation and I think that was Gurtler's goal....to get her readers thinking about the question themselves.

The Bad: While I did enjoy this book, Jaz really irritating me. It was like... every 5 minutes she was bitching and complaining about being a mixed race and how everyone else was judging her and making her feel like crap. There are a few instances where she has justified reactions but 90% of the time she is being ridiculous. It seemed to me that she was more concerned with her skin color than any of the other characters in the book and that was a huge turn-off for me because it's not exactly tackling a REAL issue it's more skimming the surface on a personal problem. Also, one thing that bugged me is that everyone in the book seemed to come from a broken background. Missing dad, abusive parents, drug-dealing pasts, cheating step fathers. It was like...does anything GOOD ever happen to someone?!

Overall, it's very hard for me to give this book a rating because there were parts that I really appreciated and liked and other parts where I wanted to throw the book across the room because I was so annoyed. So...I'll be generous and give the book a C-. If you are a fan of contemporary novels with issues of race than this might be something you'd enjoy.

**I received this book free from the publisher through www.netgalley.com. I was not required to write a positive review. The opinions I have expressed are my own.

In My Mailbox (23)

2012-01-07T20:42:00.000-06:00

Believe it or not... I have NOTHING in my mailbox this week. No purchased books, no review books, no gifted books, no library books and no free books. CRAZY!

But this is my TBR bookshelf...these are just physical books.... I have about 500 + on my Kindle that need to be read as well...

Yikes.

How to Eat a Cupcake by Meg Donohue Review

2012-01-06T05:30:00.000-06:00

As one of my last reads of 2011, this book was a pleasant surprise. The blurb made me think it was going to be nothing more than a superficial romance type of book. It was actually a lot deeper than that and I found myself thoroughly sad when the book came to an end. Goodreads Summary:

Funny, free-spirited Annie Quintana and sophisticated, ambitious Julia St. Clair come from two different worlds. Yet, as the daughter of the St. Clair’s housekeeper, Annie grew up in Julia’s San Francisco mansion and they forged a bond that only two little girls who know nothing of class differences and scholarships could—until a life-altering betrayal destroyed their friendship.

A decade later, Annie is now a talented, if underpaid, pastry chef who bakes to fill the void left in her heart by her mother’s death. Julia, a successful businesswoman, is tormented by a painful secret that could jeopardize her engagement to the man she loves. When a chance reunion prompts the unlikely duo to open a cupcakery, they must overcome past hurts and a mysterious saboteur or risk losing their fledgling business and any chance of healing their fractured friendship.

The Good: First off, I LOVE the cover. It makes me perfectly hungry for a great cupcake. Speaking of cupcakes...the descriptions of the cupcakes in this novel are mouth-watering. I'm not lying. Here's an example,

"For Ogden, I selected a Moroccan Vanilla Bean and Pumpkin Spice cupcake. I saw the exact moment in Ogden's eyes that the dash of heat- courtesy of a healthy pinch of cayenne-hit his tongue, and the moment a split-second later that the sugary vanilla swept away the heat, like salve on a wound."

Ummm? Gorgeous? Not only for the beautiful sentence structure but for the yummy taste it elicits. So now that I've raved about the cupcake descriptions, I have to admit that I fell in love with the characters. Almost all of them. Even snooty-patootie Julia. She is your typical rich-bitch type of character but the difference is that by the end of the book, she knows she has been one and she's willing to change. In fact, she's been willing to change the entire book she just wasn't given the chance to. Annie on the other hand is a kindred spirit that I adore. She is curvy, snarky and completely cynical. And why shouldn't she be after what she's gone through? The thing I really liked about this book is that the romance was the PERFECT amount. There were some subtle hints at romance here and there, just enough to get a taste and then when the romance between characters picked up it wasn't extreme or out of the ordinary. It was honestly, so perfect because it felt like real life situations. I thought Donohue did GREAT with that aspect. I also thought the conflict in the novel was done very well. There was the wedge between the two main characters Julia and Annie. There were conflicts with the "perfect" idea of a cupcakery and then there were a couple of side conflicts that fit into the novel well. I really thought this was an excellent, fun, contemporary adult read!

The Bad: As much as I adored the characters, they did get somewhat annoying at some points. I wanted to shake Annie and tell her to just let shit go. Honestly, must you dwell on the stupid things? Move on girl. Julia on the other hand, I would have just slapped in the face if it were real life. She was acting like a whiny baby who acted like she didn't do anything wrong. But that's just nitpicky really...

Overall, I was really surprised at how much I enjoyed this novel! It went by REALLY fast and believe it or not, I read the cupcake parts while doing the elliptical and I was so interested in the book that I went further than I had intended to when I was working out. *That never happens btw* I give this book a B+!!

**I received this book free from the publisher through www.netgalley.com. I was not required to write a positive review. The opinions I have expressed are my own.

Some changes and the best advice I've ever received

2012-01-05T10:43:00.001-06:00

Hello lovely followers! I have decided that Chasing Empty Pavements is in need of some changes. I've been doing a little research project on blogs, followers and content and realized that even though I've had nothing but good intentions with the memes I've participated in...perhaps my content is a little too meme-heavy. I have always prided myself on my reviews, so that will not change....but I'm thinking it's time to step back from participating so much in the memes. I would like to focus more on a couple of other things that I find most enjoyable to read about... the craft of writing, the journey of writing and up-to-date, daily book news. News about releases, covers, new authors being signed etc. So I've decided that maybe it's time to try that route instead of boring you all with memes that everyone and anyone can do. I want to apologize to all of my followers who have expected more out of me and instead I've been giving you some pretty boring material to pass over. That is no longer the case!!! Chasing Empty Pavements has been a love of labor, sweat, tears and blood. (Seriously, do you KNOW how many paper cuts I've had because of my review books?!?) So that is my big *blog changing* news. Nothing rather spectacular just a few evolving things!

Now on to the part you've all been waiting for.... the best advice I've ever received.

Go HERE.

Now. I mean, RIGHT now. If you are a writer....these 25 things will change your life. They aren't secrets to success and they aren't deep, philosophical words to uplift and inspire. Put simply...they are the TRUTH. Honest, snarky, TRUTHS. I printed each one out and taped it to my writing wall so that everyday, I can look at what those words mean to me and know above everything else in this world...

I am not alone.

I am a writer. Hear me ROAR.

The Future of Us by Jay Asher and Carolyn Macker Review

2012-01-05T05:30:00.000-06:00

This was a pretty quick and enjoyable read with a very interesting concept. I love that what we perceive as normal now (Facebook) would be totally weird back in the 90's. And what would you do if you logged onto an ancient computer (although its not ancient to Emma and Josh in the book) and saw this website that was full of your future? Crazy, right? Goodreads says:

It's 1996, and Josh and Emma have been neighbors their whole lives. They've been best friends almost as long - at least, up until last November, when Josh did something that changed everything. Things have been weird between them ever since, but when Josh's family gets a free AOL CD in the mail,his mom makes him bring it over so that Emma can install it on her new computer. When they sign on, they're automatically logged onto their Facebook pages. But Facebook hasn't been invented yet. And they're looking at themselves fifteen years in the future. By refreshing their pages, they learn that making different decisions now will affect the outcome of their lives later. And as they grapple with the ups and downs of what their futures hold, they're forced to confront what they're doing right - and wrong -in the present.

The Good: I thought for the development of the characters, Asher and Macker did a great job of nailing teenagers in the 90's. They are characteristically on track for what is *real* life teenagers. They are perfectly angsty, whiny, lustful, all full of expectations and dreams. I thought the character building was great. Like I said earlier, I also loved the plot and themes of this crazy technology showing us our future. Josh and Emma understandably want to both change and not change things about the future and that's just human nature! The writing was easy and quick to read and I enjoyed that the pov's changed between Josh and Emma. You could tell that it was two different authors writing two very different characters.

The Bad: While the writing was good (but not great), I did feel like it was a bit on the younger side. That kind of took away from the story a little bit. I was also disappointed in the relationships and apparent "love" between Josh and Emma. Even the secondary characters Tyson and Kellan (LOVE the name btw) were lacking....romance or chemistry. It all felt very blah for me when it came to the love/dating aspect. I also think things worked out a little too easily for Josh and Emma's conflict. Asher and Mackler started out with this really fantastical idea, but it was followed through all the way. There were so many more aspects to explore.

Overall though, this book was entertaining and enjoyable. Recommended for the younger set and maybe those who are nostalgic for the 90's and pop culture references. I give it a B!

It's Monday! What are you reading? (15)

2012-01-02T09:04:00.001-06:00

This is a great way to plan out your reading week and see what others are currently reading as well… you never know where that next “must read” book will come from!

Right now I'm reading:

Eden Newman must mate before her 18th birthday in six months or she'll be left outside to die in a burning world. But who will pick up her mate-option when she's cursed with white skin and a tragically low mate-rate of 15%? In a post-apocalyptic, totalitarian, underground world where class and beauty are defined by resistance to an overheated environment, Eden's coloring brands her as a member of the lowest class, a weak and ugly Pearl. If only she can mate with a dark-skinned Coal from the ruling class, she'll be safe. Just maybe one Coal sees the Real Eden and will be her salvation her co-worker Jamal has begun secretly dating her. But when Eden unwittingly compromises her father's secret biological experiment, she finds herself in the eye of a storm and thrown into the last area of a rainforest, a strange and dangerous land. Eden must fight to save her father, who may be humanity's last hope, while standing up to a powerful beast-man she believes is her enemy, despite her overwhelming attraction. Eden must change to survive but only if she can redefine her ideas of beauty and of love, along with a little help from her "adopted aunt" Emily Dickinson.

Okay, so this book is pleasantly surprising in the fact that it's actually pretty good so far!

What are YOU reading this fine Monday?

In My Mailbox (22) NEW YEAR'S DAY EDITION!!

2012-01-01T05:30:00.000-06:00

In My Mailbox (IMM) is a weekly meme by Kristi @ The Story Siren, IMM is where we get to share what books we received for review, bought, borrowed or were gifted in the past week. For more information on IMM, visit Kristi's page here.

HAPPY NEW YEARS EVERYONE!!! HOPE 2012 IS A WONDERFUL YEAR FOR YOU!

From My Bookworm Santa:

Bought:

Review:

Library:

Kindle Steals and Deals:

Best of 2011 Reads!!!

2011-12-31T08:00:00.000-06:00

It's that time of the year where we reflect on the past year, the accomplishments, highlights, obstacles and craziness that surrounded us. For me, this year has been crazy, mostly in a good way but there were a few hiccups along the way. I got engaged to my best friend in the entire world, I graduated college, I started a new and meaningful job and I got super involved with blogging and book reviewing. I put myself out there and decided to sign up for a writing conference in April, so I've been trying to get my WIP'S to a stage that they are somewhat good enough to be looked at by the agents/publishers there. Overall, this year has been a really good one for me. I look back and realize how incredibly lucky and blessed I am to have my family, friends and fiance. Anyways...I've been rambling for too long. Time to get to the good stuff... BOOKS! After compiling the list, I was surprised that there weren't more YA books in the top 10. I guess this was a year for more A than Y :) But in no particular order here are my favorite books of 2011!! All links attached to title go to my review of the book!

Hate List by Jennifer Brown.

Delirium by Lauren Oliver

Ashfall by Mike Mullin

*I had the pleasure of meeting Mike and having a nice dinner with him and some other writers this year. One of the BEST experiences ever!

Domestic Violets by Matthew Norman

Wanderlove by Kirsten Hubbard

The Passage by Justin Cronin

The Night Circus by Erin Morgenstern

This Girl is Different by JJ Johnson

Sing You Home by Jodi Picoult

The Homecoming of Samuel Lake by Jenny Wingfield

Those are my top 10 reads of 2011 but I feel like there are a few books that deserve an honorable mention as it was VERY difficult to pick just 10. So here are a few more that almost made the list!

I would LOVE links to YOUR favorite reads of 2011!! Here's to a fabulous 2012 everyone!

Pulp and Paper by Josh Rolnick Review

2011-12-30T05:30:00.000-06:00

This book of short stories was a pleasant surprise for me as it was published by University of Iowa Press and I really appreciate the exposure UI Press gives up and coming authors. Goodreads summary of this book of stories:

“I glanced out the window as my train pulled into the station and saw the girl who killed my son.” So begins Josh Rolnick’s powerful debut collection of eight stories, which utilizes a richly focused narrative style accenting the unavoidable tragedies of life while revealing the grace and dignity with which people learn to deal with them. The stories—four set in New Jersey and four in New York—span the wide geographic tapestry of the area and demonstrate the interconnectedness of both the neighboring states and the residents who inhabit them.

In “Funnyboy,” a grief-stricken Levi Stern struggles to come to terms with the banality of his son’s accidental death at the hands of Missy Jones, high school cheerleader. In “Pulp and Paper,” two neighbors, Gail Denny and Avery Mayberry, attempt to escape a toxic spill resulting from a train derailment when a moment of compassion alters both their futures forever. “Innkeeping” features a teenager’s simmering resentment toward the burgeoning relationship between his widowed mother and a long-term hotel guest. “The Herald” introduces us to Dale, a devoted reporter on a small-town newspaper, desperately striving to break a big-time story to salvage his career and his ego. A teenager deals with the inconceivable results of his innocent act before an ice hockey game in “Big Lake.” And in “The Carousel,” a Coney Island carousel operator confronts the fading memories of a world that once overflowed with grandeur and promise. Throughout, Rolnick’s characters search for a firm footing while wrestling with life’s hardships, finding hope and redemption in the simple yet uncommon willingness to act.

Pulp and Paper captures lightning in a bottle, excavating the smallest steps people take to move beyond grief, heartbreak, and failure—conjuring the subtle, fragile moments when people are not yet whole, but no longer quite as broken.

The Good: I think it takes a talented writer to write short stories that not only have tightly woven plots but characters with depth and a story to tell. I know short stories are a hard sell for me usually because I love to become invested in the story and the characters and obviously I don't get that as much with a short story. This collection of stories however are at times so well written, I am actually angry when I come to the end because I want more. Pulp and Paper is split into two sections... 4 stories in the New Jersey section and 4 stories in the New York section. I personally, thought the New Jersey stories were better. I found Rolnick's ability to make his characters resonate with the readers very impressive and I really enjoyed this collection of short stories!

The Bad: There were a couple of stories that hindered on being boring and this was one of the times I was glad I was reading a book of short stories because I knew that I had other stories to look forward to.

Overall this was a well written and interesting book of short stories and I would recommend it for a quick and brief look at the author, Josh Rolnick. I would definitely be willing to read anything this author puts out. I give this book a B+.

**I received this book free from the publisher through www.netgalley.com. I was not required to write a positive review. The opinions I have expressed are my own.

Hate List by Jennifer Brown Review

2011-12-29T05:30:00.001-06:00

I started this book on a whim because I’d seen it on other blogs before and I couldn’t decide among the INSANE amount of books I’ve gotten over the last couple months which book to read. So I randomly just scrolled through my kindle and put my finger on a book and lo and behold it was Hate List. I could not have made a more perfect decision though. This book surpassed my highest expectations. It shot straight to the top of my 2011 favorite reads. First I will let Goodreads give you a summary:

Five months ago, Valerie Leftman's boyfriend, Nick, opened fire on their school cafeteria. Shot trying to stop him, Valerie inadvertently saved the life of a classmate, but was implicated in the shootings because of the list she helped create. A list of people and things she and Nick hated. The list he used to pick his targets.

Now, after a summer of seclusion, Val is forced to confront her guilt as she returns to school to complete her senior year. Haunted by the memory of the boyfriend she still loves and navigating rocky relationships with her family, former friends and the girl whose life she saved, Val must come to grips with the tragedy that took place and her role in it, in order to make amends and move on with her life.

The Good: There are so many things going right with this book that my mind is scrambled right now. From the opening lines of the book, “The scene in the Garvin High School cafeteria, known as the Commons, is being described as “grim” by investigators who are working to identify the victims of a shooting spree that erupted Friday morning" to the very end, this book not only captured my attention, but it had me by the throat, demanding that each page be read with intense fury. I guess I should start with the writing. Hate List is not only well-written but it is extremely addictive writing. Brown seamlessly moves from past to present, character to character without blinking an eye and it all works so well. You don’t know you’re 200 pages in until you look at the clock and realize you’ve been reading for a couple hours. That’s how much this book consumes you. So great writing? Check. Let’s move on to some of the issues brought up in this book. School Shooting. Love. High School. Bullying. Parental divorce and fighting. Poverty. This book touches on all those topics but the thing is…it goes SO much deeper than that. Our main character, Valerie is the girlfriend of a school shooter. What’s even worse is that the people he chose to shoot are people he AND Valerie put on a “hate list.” This novel goes deeper than that surface topic though and delves into the fact that just because something awful and disturbing has been done by Valerie’s boyfriend…she still loves him. Love doesn’t just stop immediately after something like that. It takes time. But what do you think the rest of the world would want her to do? Hate him? Yes…they do want that. Society expects that of her. Even Valerie expects that of herself. But that is not life! It’s not love. This book explores that difficulty of navigating between what society/life/Valerie expects out of her and than the reality of the matter. Another deeper issue this book brings up is the expectations of parental love. I’ve been told my entire life that no matter what, my parents will love me. No matter what. But what if I were to be involved with someone that shot 16 people? Would they still love me unconditionally? This is the question Valerie grapples with. Really, she is innocent as far as the shooting goes, but both of her parents don’t see it that way. She may not have physically shot those people, but it was her words, her relationship and her involvement with Nick that implicate her in the shooting as well. This is an incredibly difficult thing to have to deal with. Valerie is not only trying to recover from the ordeal and deal with her own guilty conscious but than to have your parents knowingly act like it was your fault is an awful feeling. The best example I can give is when Valerie’s dad is talking to her,

“No,” he said, without facing me. “Maybe it makes me a bad parent, but I don’t know if I can forgive you. No matter what the police found, you were involved in that shooting, Valerie. You wrote those names on that list. You wrote my name on that list. You had a good life here. You may not have pulled the trigger, but you helped cause the tragedy.”

And on the flip side of things…how would it feel to be the parent? How COULD you look at your kid, knowing they were in love with someone who killed so many people? Would I be able to forgive my child for that? Would you?

Another great issue that was brought up is something that I think is so remnant of teenage relationships. It’s this whole attitude of being so wrapped up in love, lust and feelings that you sort of just agree with the things the other person says. Whether its because you want them to trust you, like you, respect you or just have a feeling of camaraderie, sometimes it’s the “pretending” that ends up getting you more in trouble. For example, Nick talked about death and revenge a lot and when he’d ask Valerie questions she would either nod in agreement or say something neutral that would lead Nick to believe she understood what he meant and agreed with him, even if that’s not what Valerie truly thought. Brown completely nails this whole phenomenon with a couple of lines that come from Valerie, “Who was I kidding? I never even really belonged with Nick. Because I totally betrayed him, made him think I believed what he believed, made him think I would be on his side no matter what, even if he killed people.” This is exactly the issue, teens are so vulnerable and impressionable at the high school age and especially during new and powerful relationships. They are so willing to give themselves entirely to someone and they end up losing themselves before it’s too late to realize what’s going on. These issues are exactly why reading this book turned out to be such a huge experience for me. Instead of focusing JUST on the topical issues, Brown goes deeper and pushes the envelope to make people REALLY think about these things, make them question even their own moral beliefs. I love that this book is realistic and the school and the popular kids aren’t all hunky-dory after the shooting happens, because that is not real life when that happens. Speaking from experience of witnessing a school tragedy, people do not change all that much. Most of them keep on acting bratty, selfish and downright mean. But that’s not to say that no one changes, because sometimes they do. The girl that Valerie chooses to save in this book is completely altered by the experience and she really does change, but it’s not like a 180 change and suddenly she’s sugar sweet, it’s a gradual, grown-up change and it’s done so well that by the end of the book, you can’t help but adore the girl who was once such a witch to Valerie. I also loved watching Valerie’s growth from the beginning of the novel to the end. She grows so much as she navigates all the emotions she’s feeling and I appreciate that Brown allows her to be both the victim and the perpetrator at certain points. I also appreciate that Brown makes Valerie stand up for herself at certain times because really, it’s not fair the way she is treated and it would have been really annoying and unrealistic if she let Valerie play the victim the whole way through and let her blame herself entirely. It would have felt like a sob story a little bit. But watching Valerie get angry, shout and stand up for herself was wonderful and refreshing. Really there are probably lots of other things I could talk about in relationship to this novel, but I think I’ve rambled on enough and you get the hint that I really freaking loved this book. I finished it and literally ten minutes later bought the book for my sister who started reading it Christmas morning and ended up finishing it that night with the same feelings I had about the book.

I would recommend this book to anyone of any age. It may be a book that is set centrally around a teenage/high school character but the themes, topics and issues that are discussed are certainly more than that. I think so many types of readers would enjoy this book and find something extremely important to take away from it. I give it an A+!!

Waiting on Wednesday (15)

2011-12-28T05:30:00.000-06:00

Waiting on Wednesday is a weekly meme hosted by Jill from Breaking the Spine. This allows people to showcase the books they cannot wait to get their hands on!

I'm waiting on:

This should really be no surprise to anyone seeing as how I absolutely adore Jodi Picoult. I really hope this novel is great because there for a little while, I was afraid she was losing some of her writing talent with some of her latest books. But she got her mojo back with Sing You Home and hopefully this one will be just as good!

Teaser Tuesdays (17)

2011-12-27T05:30:00.000-06:00

My teasers this week comes from:

"I wanted to know what kind of spill would look so glorious, so shiny. Spills are usually ugly and messy, not beautiful."

"Sometimes I'm so busy seeing you as the enemy who dismantled my family's life I forget to see that you were the one who stopped the shooting. You were the one who saved that girl's life. I've never thanked you for that, have I?"

Oh my goodness, this book is amazing. Absolutely amazing. I can't wait to do my review on this book because I have so much I want to say about it!

Show me your teasers!

It's Monday! What are you reading? (14)

2011-12-26T05:30:00.000-06:00

This is a great way to plan out your reading week and see what others are currently reading as well… you never know where that next “must read” book will come from!

I'm currently reading:

Goodreads Summary:

This.book.is.so.AMAZING. Wow. I'm loving this book right now!

In My Mailbox (21) CHRISTMAS EDITION!!!!

2011-12-25T05:30:00.000-06:00

Bought:

Review:

Library:

Kindle Steals and Deals:

GIFTED:

Merry Christmas?! What did Santa bring to YOUR mailbox?!

Saturday YA Vault (11) Christmas Eve Edition!

2011-12-24T05:30:00.000-06:00

This meme is hosted by Short and Sweet in an effort to showcase some YA novels that have been forgotten or glanced over. So many of us in the YA book blogging community concentrate on the newer releases but sometimes it's okay to go back to the older stuff too. Rules are simple:

1. The book MUST be a YA book (hence the name).

2. The book has to be at least one year older than the date you post it (meaning today's books have to be published earlier than December 2010)

What better way to showcase a Young Adult Book with a Christmas theme than:

Goodreads summary:

Sparkling white snowdrifts, beautiful presents wrapped in ribbons, and multicolored lights glittering in the night through the falling snow. A Christmas Eve snowstorm transforms one small town into a romantic haven, the kind you see only in movies. Well, kinda. After all, a cold and wet hike from a stranded train through the middle of nowhere would not normally end with a delicious kiss from a charming stranger. And no one would think that a trip to the Waffle House through four feet of snow would lead to love with an old friend. Or that the way back to true love begins with a painfully early morning shift at Starbucks. Thanks to three of today's bestselling teen authors—John Green, Maureen Johnson, and Lauren Myracle—the magic of the holidays shines on these hilarious and charming interconnected tales of love, romance, and breathtaking kisses.

If you want a quick Christmas-themed book written by several amazing YA writers...this is your book!

What are YOU bringing out of the vault on this snowless* Christmas Eve?! :)

*For the first time in a long time there is not a drop of snow on the ground. Since I've lived in the midwest my entire life, I can't say I'm too bad about this *green* Christmas!

Dearly, Departed by Lia Habel Review

2011-12-23T05:30:00.000-06:00

This book was a first for me in two ways. Steampunk and Zombies. I read a ton...I mean.. A TON... and yet I've managed to not come across either of those things. Well after reading Dearly, Departed I am pretty sure I'm no longer going to ignore those genres, because this book was AWESOME! Goodreads Summary:

Love conquers all, so they say. But can Cupid’s arrow pierce the hearts of the living and the dead—or rather, the undead? Can a proper young Victorian lady find true love in the arms of a dashing zombie?

The year is 2195. The place is New Victoria—a high-tech nation modeled on the manners, mores, and fashions of an antique era. A teenager in high society, Nora Dearly is far more interested in military history and her country’s political unrest than in tea parties and debutante balls. But after her beloved parents die, Nora is left at the mercy of her domineering aunt, a social-climbing spendthrift who has squandered the family fortune and now plans to marry her niece off for money. For Nora, no fate could be more horrible—until she’s nearly kidnapped by an army of walking corpses.

But fate is just getting started with Nora. Catapulted from her world of drawing-room civility, she’s suddenly gunning down ravenous zombies alongside mysterious black-clad commandos and confronting “The Laz,” a fatal virus that raises the dead—and hell along with them. Hardly ideal circumstances. Then Nora meets Bram Griswold, a young soldier who is brave, handsome, noble . . . and dead. But as is the case with the rest of his special undead unit, luck and modern science have enabled Bram to hold on to his mind, his manners, and his body parts. And when his bond of trust with Nora turns to tenderness, there’s no turning back. Eventually, they know, the disease will win, separating the star-crossed lovers forever. But until then, beating or not, their hearts will have what they desire.

In Dearly, Departed, romance meets walking-dead thriller, spawning a madly imaginative novel of rip-roaring adventure, spine-tingling suspense, and macabre comedy that forever redefines the concept of undying love.

The Good: Firstly, the setting was pretty ingenious. I loved that this is taking place in 2195 and it's a throwback to the Victorian age. At times, this was kind of confusing because the views and language stayed pretty true to the Victorian culture but then all this technology talk would start and it brings you back to the future. I actually kind of liked this mixture. The novel is not only well-written but the wittiness of the writing is fabulous. I loved the way the author made me laugh. The characters are all so well done and thought out, but my heart fell for Bram. At first, I was kinda grossed out by the fact that I was swooning over a Zombie but after a while, kind of like Nora, he had grown on me. I love the crazy cast of characters in this novel and I like the way the Zombie's were introduced in this sort of believable way. I also like that the Zombie's aren't grouped together as one lump species. Some of them become "undead" with the same personality they died with and some become "undead" and go nutso. Kind of like real life eh? There were a few little sub plot things that I caught that made me enjoy this story... there is an element of revenge in the novel that I don't think many people realize how much deeper this makes the story. It totally adds another element on to the plot as well as a part where humanity shows through. There is a point, at the end, where I think Habel did an extremely good job showing just how amazing some people can be despite the odds. Lastly, I happen to adore this cover but I've seen some other ones floating around that are NOT this lovely. I think that this cover represents Nora and I think it does a great job.

The Bad: While I enjoyed Pamela's character, I felt like that whole side story was just... out of place. I didn't exactly know why Habel spent so much time on her survival story or the bitchy blonde girl who hates both Pam and Nora and even Mr. Allister who is a douche bag. Really would have liked to see further explanation for why they were such a focus for the book and why we didn't see more of them at the end.

Overall, I really did enjoy this book and it supplied such a good vibe for Zombies/Steampunk novels. I'm definitely going to be on the lookout for other books like this one! I give this book an A-!!!

**I received this book free from the publisher through www.netgalley.com. I was not required to write a positive review. The opinions I have expressed are my own.

My Horizontal Life Review by Chelsea Handler

2011-12-22T05:30:00.000-06:00

I have been a fan of Chelsea Handler for a long time and I can't believe I didn't pick up any of her books until now. I actually started reading this on my iPod at the gym when I was bored of the treadmill and decided to get on the eliptical, but I needed some major distraction. This did the trick. This. Book. Is. Ridiculously. Funny. AHHH! Goodreads summary:

In this raucous collection of true-life stories, actress and comedian Chelsea Handler recounts her time spent in the social trenches with that wild, strange, irresistible, and often gratifying beast: the one-night stand.

You've either done it or know someone who has: the one-night stand, the familiar outcome of a night spent at a bar, sometimes the sole payoff for your friend's irritating wedding, or the only relief from a disastrous vacation. Often embarrassing and uncomfortable, occasionally outlandish, but most times just a necessary and irresistible evil, the one-night stand is a social rite as old as sex itself and as common as a bar stool.

Enter Chelsea Handler. Gorgeous, sharp, and anything but shy, Chelsea loves men and lots of them. My Horizontal Life chronicles her romp through the different bedrooms of a variety of suitors, a no-holds-barred account of what can happen between a man and a sometimes very intoxicated, outgoing woman during one night of passion. From her short fling with a Vegas stripper to her even shorter dalliance with a well-endowed little person, from her uncomfortable tryst with a cruise ship performer to her misguided rebound with a man who likes to play leather dress-up, Chelsea recalls the highs and lows of her one-night stands with hilarious honesty. Encouraged by her motley collection of friends (aka: her partners in crime) but challenged by her family members (who at times find themselves a surprise part of the encounter), Chelsea hits bottom and bounces back, unafraid to share the gritty details. My Horizontal Life is one guilty pleasure you won't be ashamed to talk about in the morning.

The Good: The one thing about Chelsea Handler is that she expects nothing and you know when you start this book that it's not going to be some great literary adventure and you're not going to walk away with any deep philosophical thoughts. This book's author prepares you for exactly what you're going to get... a crazy, sexilicious book of romps that is hilarious. I didn't expect anything more from this book and I found that I actually enjoyed reading a book that was for pure entertainment and laughter than anything else.

The Bad: Nothing bad about this book! The only thing I can say is that I wonder how much of it is actually true....

Overall, a GREAT, FUNNY read that you won't regret diving into. A!!!