The Sharpened Spoon

Ten Things my Evangelical Pastors Didn’t Tell Me About the Bible

2019-06-13T18:30:00.000-07:00

I grew up fundy, I’ve had to face it. I’ve tried to put all kinds of spins on it, conservative, mainline traditional, but facts are facts, and although I didn’t see it,
and still don’t remember my parents or grandparents as cruel, or hateful in any way, that’s what it was.

From the time I was born until the age of fourteen, my dad was a Church of Christ preacher. I never experienced any kind of racism, or bigotry, toward

anyone who came into the congregations where he preached, or in our home. Everyone was welcome, no matter their heritage, status, “orientation”

or “lifestyle” ( I use these terms in quotes, because this is the language that was used to describe the “others”) they were always treated with love and

respect and we tried to help everyone we could.

That being said, there was a fair bit of proselytizing, which only makes sense in the circumstances, but never any condemnation from them toward

anyone that I witnessed,. Regardless of their beliefs. Maybe this is why I was able to hide from my own concerns for so long. There was never any

doubt that they believed whole-heartedly that without a meaningful conversion experience to Christ, everyone was lost and going to a literal, real hell.

I know what some of you are thinking, what kind of monsters were they? But, you likely have had some beliefs in your life that you were forced to

reconsider, and I fully believe, had they lived long enough, this would have been one for them. My dad admitted at the end of his life that I had

convinced him that hell definitely wasn’t what he’d thought. But, that’s a story for another time.

About the time I turned fourteen, my dad’s theology changed, but not necessarily for the better. We dived headlong out of the mega conservative,

no instrumental music in worship, COC, into the hotbed of the Charismatic Renewal in 1985. Rock bands, and tambourines, if you couldn’t speak

in tongues, you might not be saved, kind of places. The Sunday services would run for hours!

From there, I ran through the gamut of “non-denominational” churches, but everywhere I went, a certain arrogant ignorance pervaded the leadership.

Most of them had only a rudimentary knowledge of scripture. Which, for a COC kid was appalling, after all, we basically treated the Bible as a

defacto minister of God. It was inerrant, and perfect in every way, after all, it was just up to us to study it hard enough to suss out the answers.

There’s a certain level of death to intellectual curiosity that comes with accepting that the Bible, is, in your mind, inerrant. Although this is a relatively

new idea, in the scheme of things, it has been pervasive through most of American Evangelical Christianity for the past century or so. Even in

places where it wasn’t considered quite as literal and concrete as I’d been taught as a child (6 literal days of creation, and so on) those ideas

were almost never expressed from the pulpit. There was a tacit understanding that the book was the book, and whatever it said, and whoever

was in charge agreed to interpret is as meaning, stood.

So, what’s so wrong with that? Well, I don’t know all of the answers to this question, but here are ten things I picked up on later in life that led

to a whole bunch of questions that ended up with me thinking there is no hell, and gay people are okay with Jesus and maybe a lot of the other

rules we made for ourselves didn’t make a whole lot of sense, and the whole thing was really about being good to people in the first place.

Here they are, the ten things they never told me.

The best description of God in the Bible is a metaphor.

That’s right. We’ve fought wars over these poetic understandings, though. So, they must be able to be understood and taken literally, right? See, the idea is this, God is so big (and if there is a single intelligence behind the universe, it would have to be) that we simply cannot understand, and so, we have to resort to metaphorical language to compare God to things we can know. God is ineffable in essence. But, if this is true, why did I see so much anger for people who insisted on seeing the feminine in the divine, or had another name for God?

God is not a man.

At best, the divine is a blend of genders. It says so right in the first two chapters, but we overlook that and default to father, although he’s also described as animals, a woman, forces of nature, and even inanimate objects. As science begins to unfold what it means for humans to have gender, they are discovering that even on a measurable level, there is very little evidence for the strict binary definitions we’ve applied until very recently. To me, this binary understanding has been used primarily to hold half of the population in check. Yes, women, you’ve been robbed of your rightful place, because some guys decided that some other guys, who wrote all this stuff down, said guys were put in charge by the head guy himself, God, and it’s not true.

There’s very little history, outside of the Bible itself, to back up much of what is in it.

Sorry, whatever they told you at Bible college, might need to be reconfirmed, as awful as it sounds a whole lot of lies have been told to prop up doctrine. I don’t know a lot about this. It is true there is as much evidence for the existence of some of the personalities in the Bible as for other historical figures, but much of what is told within its pages cannot be confirmed through other historical records.

Almost NONE of the source texts come from “original” languages.

In many evangelical circles there is this belief that if you get to the "original" language of the Bible you can make more sense of it. In some cases this is true. It's been mistranslated and misinterpreted. In other places, additional words have simply been made up to make it make what the translator thought was good sense. So, what is the truth

The OT was rewritten into other languages, and then translated back into Hebrew. The Greek that the NT scrolls were written in was not the spoken language of the people who wrote it. Many of them spoke Aramaic, it's believed. Linguistically speaking it’s a stew, and that’s before you even get to the oral tradition being handed down for generations before many of the books were written, or the translation challenges of converting mostly dead languages into somewhat modern English equivalents.

There's more than one "canon" of the "Holy Bible

To say that the “canon” (group of books included in the Bible) of scripture is inspired (directly selected by the Holy Spirit) is a confusing, and misleading statement. There have been many. Hell, there are still many groups of books claiming the title of Bible. Right now there is the 66 book canon of the mainline protestant church, the 73 books of the Catholic Bible, which by the way, has the claim of being older than the protestant, just by history and logic. And the Eastern Orthodox canon contains 81 books, and is said to be the oldest canon in church history. So, which one was inspired? Even these canons are disputed.

Not all of the Biblical authors are necessarily who I was taught they were.

For example, Paul seems to have penned the lion’s share of the New Testament. But, some of what has his name on it, most scholars believe, may have been penned by one of his own disciples, using his name to gain authority. As to the ancient texts, some of them have never had an author attributed to them.

Not everything in the Bible is scientifically accurate.

You're probably saying, wow, no kidding? (sarcastically) It is obvious that there are gaps in the understanding of the writers, and some of their observations are plain illogical. But, and here's the thing, we had a 1954 set of World Book encyclopedias as a kid and I wouldn't want to use that as a text book in a modern science class either. So much of the understanding has changed. Honestly, this point only matters if you're expecting the Bible to be completely infallible.

Surprisingly, however, the same pattern claimed as the biological order of ascendance in evolution by Darwin, is the same order used in the Creation Myth in Genesis. I remember a serious debate in our house when my brother found out that whales are not fish and my father attempted to defend the idea that the whale Jonah was “literally” swallowed by, was both a whale and a great fish, as the Bible states. To me, most of these are simply errors in understanding from the author’s point of view. After all, most people still thought of the world as flat, although the Bible describes it as round. But, I don’t need the Bible to be scientifically accurate in every point. Most historical philosophical texts have similar inaccuracies.

The idea that the Bible is perfect is new

Yep, it started less than a hundred years ago, which is funny. You'd think the earliest followers of this book would have been turned onto the fact that it was perfect, unless, maybe, it's not.

I was never told this. I doubt my father ever knew it. Different schools of theological understanding tend to insulate themselves to preserve their way of thinking. You’ll find that two Biblical scholars, both trained to similar levels of education, may have completely different understandings of what the book means on many points and often have never even been confronted with opposing views. The other interesting thing is this, I’ve rarely met a Bible professor who found the Bible to be as black and white as it was nearly always presented from the pulpits I heard it taught from.

There are even problems with the doctrine of "Divine Inspiration"

The idea of the divine inspiration of the Biblical writers doesn’t gel with the idea of free will. Either God creates automatons, even temporarily, to act as mediums ( a practice strictly forbidden in scripture) to transcribe the history and thoughts of God, or men do it willingly. If the former, then what the hell? And was that same possession present when all translation, interpretation, and transcription was done? If not, how would you assume that all of these men (they’re always all considered men) get it all perfectly right, without inserting a single opinion. But, then, we’re given a glimpse into this by Paul, at least once when he tells us straight up this is my opinion, not God speaking.

The Bible’s inerrancy is not only unprovable, but it simply doesn’t matter.

Here’s why. After being in church, literally, since the third day of my life, I’ve come to this conclusion, it does not matter one bit if the Bible is perfect or not. Well, of course it does, some will say, otherwise, we might be living a lie. Well, here’s the thing, you might anyway, even if it’s perfect. Why? Imagine this.

There is an atomic bomb in your front yard. Unless you defuse it, at some point in the future, no one knows exactly when, it will take you and everyone you know out. Never fear! Instructions for defusing this bomb have been delivered. But, here’s the thing. They were written by someone who never saw this bomb. Two thousand years ago. With their untechnological minds. In a foreign language they didn’t speak. That’s not all. Then it was translated from these ancient texts, then transcribed many times, and finally, it was made into an “interpretation” of the original text. But, if you are not precise in every single detail of your defusal process, BOOM!

So, you call in the experts. They can help, right? They’ve devoted their entire lives to studying these instructions and teaching these instructions. They arrive and immediately begin to argue. Why? Because they all have a different idea of how the bomb should be defused and all of them show you in the instructions how their way is right. One says you open the bomb first, then pray, then defuse. Another says, no, pray only, God will defuse the bomb. Another says, dunk the bomb in water, pray, then defuse. And they all have followers who espouse their method. Because, if you don’t get this right, they’re all doomed.

Finally, they resort, not to the original texts, but to commentaries based on other’s understanding of the texts, to solve their disagreements, but this just leads to more disagreements. What do you do? The instructions are perfect, you know that. But, now you’ve got three different versions of them, and tons of peripheral information explaining them and the more you try to make it make sense, the less it does.

That’s why it simply does not matter if the Bible is perfect, infallible, or inerrant. Because, even if it were, we cannot come to a common understanding of what it means.

So, what is the Bible? To me, it’s simply a journal. It’s a journal of men and women who dedicated their entire existence to unravelling the God puzzle, understanding who the creator is, and what our relationship to the divine should be. It records their mistakes, their broken ideas, their imperfect observations, and some of the results. It encourages us to good things, and where it does, we should follow it. Then it has some horrible advice, which is proven wrong. Where this is true, we should learn from it.

But, how do you make peace with all of this? Simple. I’ve come to understand that the bomb (hell) does not exist. There is no lake of eternal fire. God doesn’t torture people eternally for deeds committed on a finite time line. In fact, the Bible doesn’t even say that. But, that’s a story for another time.

Two Degrees of Emancipation Between You and a Jail Cell

2016-02-25T20:48:00.001-08:00

Emancipation: the fact or process of being set free from legal, social, or political restrictions; liberation:

You, and every citizen in the “freest nation on earth” are two steps away from a jail cell.

No, I’m not engaging in hyperbole, you have two degrees of emancipation from the penal justice system. It’s true. It is an indisputable fact, and I can prove it.

You see, somehow we have gotten to the point that every….single….facet of American’s lives is regulated by one level of government, or more. Not only that, but transgressing any of their regulations can land you in cuffs.

You cannot even use a toilet in this country, without the toilet, the pipes, the water, the plumber, the floor it’s set on, the walls beside it, the roof over it, being regulated.

And God forbid you decide to go outside of an approved receptacle and get caught, you could end up on the sex offenders list, for life!

So, how does that equate to two degrees of emancipation? After all, they can’t throw you in jail for having an illegal toilet, or can they? This is where it gets interesting.

It has always been true, for most of my life that all facets of life were connected, however loosely, to the government’s approval of what I do.

So, what do I mean about being two steps away from a jail cell? Let me share a story. I was in a little town in Oklahoma about 10 pm a few years back. When I came into town, I hit their speed trap and got dinged for under 10 over.

So, I wrote a check and I put it in the mail, via their instructions on the back of the citation. And, I thought, reasonably, that it was over and forgot about it.

Fast forward eight months, Edmond Oklahoma at a stoplight. There was a bit of gravel on the street and as I stopped, my tires scratched, just the teeniest bit, causing my tire to roll just a bit into the crosswalk. Since I saw a cop catty corner from me, I checked my mirror and rolled back just a bit, thinking nothing.

A few seconds later, the same cop has circled back and pulled me over because he saw me roll over the stop line, and he’s only going to give me a warning. Takes my license. Five minutes later, he’s unsnapping his holster and asking me to put my hands on the car.

One speeding ticket on a clean record, Plus, One missed court date that I received no notice from the little town about, Plus, No criminal record, equals a trip to the city jail and additional fines totaling $850, including an impound of my car, although I was gone from it for less than an hour total.

So, what made it happen? A little bit of magic called “Contempt of court”.

An almost knee jerk reaction to my not knowing I was supposed to be there, and a “suspended license”, also automatic, also without notification. Had I not been able to pay my fines, and my warrant fee, they could have kept me. By the time I was extradited to the small town to see their judge it could have been days.

And this can happen for ANYTHING, literally. Parking tickets, dog tickets, an unpaid home inspection violation fine, a delayed payment for a fine for leaving your trashcan at the curb, the list goes on.

So, you say, these are nuisances, don’t engage in antisocial behavior and it won’t be a problem. Right?

Unless you live in Oklahoma and decide to:

· DO YOUR OWN HAIR WITHOUT A LICENSE

· ALLOW THREE OR MORE DOGS TO CONGREGATE ON PRIVATE PROPERTY WITHOUT WRITTEN PERMISSION FROM THE MAYOR

· HAVE ORAL SEX, EVEN IF MARRIED

· TAKE A BITE OUT OF ANOTHER PERSON’S HAMBURGER

· SPIT ON A SIDEWALK

· WEAR BOOTS TO BED

· HAVE SEX BEFORE MARRIED

· CARRY A FISH IN A FISHBOWL ON A PUBLIC BUS

· DON’T PAY PROPERTY TAXES ANNUALLY ON YOUR HOUSEHOLD FURNISHINGS

· MAKE UGLY FACES AT PEOPLE

· OR FORGET TO TIE UP YOUR CAR WHILE VISITING A PUBLIC BUILDING.

All of these are actual laws in the state of Oklahoma, which you can be directly jailed for, or fined, then jailed if you miss court.

The United States of America has the largest percentage of citizens behind bars of any nation on earth. Although we have less than 5% of the world’s population, we have 25% of the world’s prisoners.

Not only that but it has become an industry!

Prisons can be privately owned, and in some states, they can have contracts with the department of corrections that mandate a specific number of filled beds, or huge fines to be paid by the state for not finding enough prisoners to keep the beds filled.

Prisoners are often hired out for labor and paid a small fraction of the wages they should receive, far below minimum wage, meanwhile, their prison overlords reap the profits. Oh, boo hoo, you say? Too bad, don’t break the law?

Well, in case the list above is not enough to make you question if they all belong there, this might. Of all the convicted felons in prison in the US, over 95% of them never went to trial.

That’s right! over 9 out of 10 convicted felons were convicted on a plea bargain and never stood in front of a jury. Many times it was all determined by one man or woman, not even a judge.

Why does this matter?

It matters because our legal system is based on the age old principle of the presumption of innocence. The burden of proof lies with the state. It’s hard to prove in a court of law, that a person has committed a crime, beyond a reasonable doubt.

So, prosecutors, knowing this, quote the stats of how many convictions they have earned, versus exonerations. They scare prisoners by telling them, they are virtually assured to be convicted and sent to prison for the maximum sentence.

But, only those cases that are assured “slam dunks” are ever allowed to go to trial. They will offer immunity, if they believe the prisoner is innocent, or not a danger, they will offer a reduced sentence if they think they can get it.

So prisoners are agreeing to plead guilty based on a small number of easy to win cases!

When placed in front of a jury, the accused has the chance to tell their own story. The jury has a chance to determine if the police, the prosecutor and the system have done their job. There is a great deal of accountability in it.

By shortcutting this process in the vast majority of our criminal cases, we allow the “justice system” to essentially run unchecked. Juries are not just for determining guilt or innocence, they force the system to operate by the rules.

So, that’s why it matters that you are two steps away from a jail cell at nearly every moment of every day.

And, actually, it is worse than that. In most states, the arresting officer has, as their sole discretion, the determination of what constitutes “resisting arrest”. You can literally be charged with this crime for ANY reason they determine worthwhile.

So, what can we do about it? There’s a lot, actually. We can volunteer for jury duty. We can educate our fellow citizens to the problem. We can help change laws. We can wake people up.

Want to learn something cool? Research a concept called jury nullification!

Juries can vote not to convict when they believe a law is unjust, which in turn sets legal precedence and can work to fight unjust laws. So, there is a lot of good that comes out of the jury system that we are currently missing in our society.

Bringing a Dictionary to a Gunfight

2016-02-22T07:10:00.000-08:00

There’s been something bugging me for a bit. It seems these days that our world is more malleable than it used to be. This, in and of itself, is not necessarily bad. For instance, the gender roles that have been etched in stone since time began are not as useful as they once were. Notice, I say gender, not sex. I speak of the idea that a family where mom wins bread and dad keeps house is somehow upside down.

But, beyond that, there is an idea that all concepts are fluid and able to be redefined to meet the current situation. This makes me crazy. Yes, you can believe what you want to believe in each given situation. That’s your prerogative. I don’t like labels, so I tend to side with a variety of groups depending on the cause, I get that. But, when it comes to describing these actions, it seems that too many are ready to throw out the dictionary! Here’s what I mean.

I have had several conversations lately where a person wanted to peg me as belonging to one group or another, but when a perfectly accurate term is used to describe their own stated position, they balk. Turns out the term that describes them has baggage they don’t want to carry, so instead of either finding a new term, or changing their position to one that is more palatable to their sensitivity, they inform me that I can no longer apply the traditional definition of the word.

I'm Baaack! Some of You May Not Like It!

2016-02-20T13:11:00.000-08:00

I have been battling the urge to return to this blog regularly for a long time. I think it’s time. Not because I think anything I have to say is terribly unique, there are others out here that feel as I do and can probably even say it better, but the voice of liberty bears repeating. It needs to be repeated as many times, and as often and as loudly as possible, especially when it is resisted in the way it is right now!

So, I am going to be throwing my thoughts out here with a few simple goals in mind, so if you want to judge my work, use whatever standard suits you, but here is what I am trying to achieve.

1. Clarify my own thoughts and sometimes the best way for me to do that is to type them out and read them. May sound weird to you, but that’s how it works for me. I often don’t really know how I feel or think on an issue until I talk about it.

2. Fight the decline of freedom. We are in a period that history teaches us could be the prelude to a very dark period. We are swinging into a totalitarian mentality. For the past 240 years, America has still maintained some semblance of peace for most of its citizens, but that may not be true very soon.

3. To learn more, and please correct me when I’m wrong. Not, in that superior way that people with shallow knowledge do, but as one wisdom seeker to another, when you think you see a clearer path, share it with me.

4. To hopefully wake up more people. I have been in a sleep walking state myself most of my adult life, engaged in artistic endeavors and attempting to ignore the political and social realm, except to comment on them from the safety of a theatrical director’s chair.

5. To forward an agenda. What is my agenda? I am fighting for an open government. No, that is not the final solution, but transparency is what will bring about change. People have to be confronted with what is actually going on in ways they cannot deny before they start to get it.

To that end, I’m going to be sharing a ton of stuff in the near future. Yeah, you won’t agree with all of it. I don’t care, except in that you engage in the debate. You tell me what you think. Think I’m wrong as I can be? Great! Let’s talk about it, and when you prove to me that I was wrong, then I’ll write about that! The TRUTH is what matters to me, not anyone system, or team, or feelings. I want to live in a world with optimum government, whatever that ends up looking like, and I can see a few things that it doesn’t and I am going to attack those.

What you won’t see here is me pulling punches. Too much false “civility” being paraded in politics today. If I think someone is a coward, or a thief, or a liar, I’ll say it. I’ll say it, or to their face. I am not an idolater, so what you think of me when I speak the truth may hurt, but I’m not interested in protecting anyone’s public persona of they are dirty. Period.

As I continue with my political writing projects with other activists and grassroots groups, I am learning more and more every day and it’s just simply time for me to voice my own opinions. In short order you will either laugh every time my name is mentioned, or you’ll be angry. I’m not looking for middle ground. We have compromised and accepted less than the best for 240 years! Time for a Change!

Both Sides of Our Political Debate Could Use a Timeout

2016-01-06T13:09:00.000-08:00

Guns. Weapons, arms, whatever term I choose, most of you had a reaction to that first word. Some of you thought, “hell yeah!”, while some of you thought, “We need to do something about them.” So, what is the answer here? Most of us think we know. We are probably convinced that either, nothing needs to be done, in fact more people need to own them, while others believe there should be fewer owned under tighter restrictions.

Meanwhile, the debate over this issue caused gun company stocks to peak, even as Obama’s speech was broadcast to the nation. There is a divide between us. There are few that have a third opinion, but I would like to discuss this in a reasonable tone and share some thoughts I have had, so please, don’t take this post and turn it into a flame war. Be civil. Express ideas in clear, less than obscene English and let people decide. Whatever your view point, I hope you agree that all humans deserve the sanctity of their own thoughts and should not be judged based on thoughts, but deeds.

Amendment II

A well regulated militia, being necessary to the security of a free state, the right of the people to keep and bear arms, shall not be infringed.

This piece of legislation, known as the second amendment to the Constitution of the United States of America, has been hotly contested in recent years, and to a lesser extent, throughout our history, especially since the last half of the twentieth century. To many, it represents a clear edict preventing congress from interfering with their rights to own weaponry privately. Others view the context of militia service as essential and would rather not have private gun ownership.

Then, there’s the debate over what arms should be included. Most sane individuals would prefer their neighbors not be allowed to hold nuclear arms, for example, but might argue in favor of nearly everything up to a heavy tank. Others feel strongly that capacity, range, velocity, rate of fire and other factors should be clearly legislated and restricted.

Here is my own take on this

I’ll keep it brief. From my own reading of history, I find it incredible that we not understand that a part of what was intended by this amendment was the right to protect one’s self from enemies foreign and domestic, including, if need be, one’s own government. After all, these men had just witnessed a bloody war to set their fellow countrymen free from a tyrannical government, and restrictions on arms had played a part in it on several occasions.

I also happen to believe in the sanctity of all human life. This does not mean I believe that self-defense is never an adequate defense for the taking of life, I do. There are times when it is necessary, or at the least, expedient. In my own life, I will strive to find other means, whenever possible, to deal with situations, rather than resorting to physical force, or violence of any kind, whether involving guns or not. This is my choice and I believe reasonable people agree with me that the taking of human life should never be a first resort. I stand by the principle of non-aggression, to the best of my understanding of it.

I believe we were intended to have the right to own personal armaments

I think the right to self-defense is an inherent human right, that ought not be abridged. I believe that the American Constitution speaks to this and prohibits congress from passing laws to prevent the keeping of arms and that the states have a responsibility to ensure this right is protected as well.

That being said, there are things that I do not agree with

1. Many, primarily on the political right, seem to take this as a right that should be paraded and taken for granted. I do not think that it should be taken lightly, or made a joke. I think the ability to take human life represented by gun ownership should be taken seriously. I think it is a heavy responsibility that requires thought and careful consideration for each person.

2. Many, primarily on the political left, seem to think that a gun, in and of itself, represents the worst kind of evil to be found in human society. They act as if the mere presence of the weapon puts them at great personal risk. They have an unhealthy fear that mirrors the lack of respect often shown from the right, in opposite terms.

3. There is a context expressed in the constitution, and even during the revolution, weapons for militia use were often restricted and kept in an armory. It was common for towns to have rules regarding the use and carrying of guns. Several western towns, Dodge City Kansas, most notably, were famous for “check your guns at the door” laws that prevented the open carrying of firearms to reduce public friction. To pretend that everyone was willy nilly in favor of personal arsenals being toted through the grocery store in times gone by is incorrect.

4. I personally do not trust the federal government to make decisions about who should and should not be armed. I think they very likely have ulterior motives for restricting the purchase, ownership and use of arms. They have proven, on regular occasions to not have the best interest of their citizens at heart, and to not be good judges of character, or even men and women of high moral character themselves.

5. Violence begets violence and approaching this as something to be shoved in anyone’s face on either side is a less than thoughtful approach which is likely to end poorly for all of us. Gun owners should be the first to admit that a firearm is a weighty responsibility and that there is a lot of inherent risk in the handling of them. That being said, gun control supporters should probably take the time to become more familiar with the thing they claim to fight against. They can be handled responsibly and when used correctly are a tremendous deterrent to violence, or the escalation of violence.

6. Any time one side of argument (the fed and our local and state police forces) wants to increase its own armament, while reducing the armament of those that they might be called to use their armament against, it should give us pause. In recent years, we have started a very public debate about police violence, which appears to be escalating. While I would hate to see it escalated further, at the time when a potential enemy is arming themselves, is not the time to reduce your own defenses.

7. We cannot continue to ignore the fact that the constitution’s power has been eroded. Now, I am not one who thinks that this document provides a magic barrier to protect all liberties. It does not. It is simply an agreement, signed by men who are long dead and gone. It has served us well in many ways and failed us in others. It is not perfect. But, it is the foundation of our legal and political systems. It has stood as the final arbiter of disputes between government and people for over 200 years and as such, it needs to be respected and used properly. If we want our society to look different than it does, or has, that can be done, and done legitimately, but it needs to be done calmly, by cool heads. Simply piling unconstitutional laws and precedents on top of things, until the truth is obfuscated is not the answer, for either side.

I do not know the answer

I, like all of you, want myself, my family and my friends to live safely in a world where violence is rare. I would love to never open my browser to find that the world has been tipped on its axis by someone with guns again, especially when children are involved.

If I believed that ridding the world of guns could achieve this, I would be the first to support it. I am no fan of violence and I abhor much of what my government does in my name, for my supposed safety. If I thought we could rid the world of all weapons tomorrow that would be glorious. I don’t.

Even if it were possible to remove all of the guns from the world, I don’t think legislation could ever make it happen.

We have a serious lack of understanding regarding the nature of laws

Laws are not barriers to behavior, at all. They can serve to deter those inclined to heed them. They are better than allowing despots total control with no standard. They provide some basis of understanding between people of reason that want to live in peace. In our country, they are also supposed to provide some barriers between government regulation and the liberty of the people. As my Grandfather once told me, “Locks just keep honest people honest.” In other words, those inclined to harm, or defraud others will do so, regardless of the law.

No law provides a shield from harm. It can provide for security measures, one of which is self-defense through use of arms. It can provide a system for determining guilt or innocence and a framework for punishing those that choose to transgress them. But a law can never prevent an act, or make the repercussions of that act disappear, and they only have the force we give them by our adherence to them.

As we move into a more and more regulated society, we move away from the liberty provided to original Americans. As each piece of our personal freedom is eroded, it is added to the growing power of a state that becomes more and more distant from its people. In this setting, when so many laws are present, all of our laws lose efficacy by the simple fact that they cannot all be enforced equally all of the time.

We should be careful of reducing each other’s freedoms

With every restriction we place on another human life, we restrict ourselves in that same measure and give just a bit more of autonomy to the state. Even when we seek to do something good, such as slowing or ending violence (something I think everyone agrees is a good thing) we can have unintended consequences.

Even something as simple as jailing even one single person places a restriction on at least one other, who must now spend their time enforcing that incarceration and is not available to contribute in our community in the same way they might have if the law were never transgressed. As we make choices about what restrictions we are willing to accept and which are too onerous, we should be careful in our responses to each other.

With every instance of anger over taking our better selves and producing rage, we reinforce habits that all of us can recognize as harmful, until our nature changes to one of hate and distrust for those we disagree with. This can happen even when our motives are pure. By escalating every conversation to the point of conflict, we create a culture of distrust and hatred, of intolerance and cruelty that leads us to not just disagree, but to genuinely not care about anyone else’s point of view.

We are at a tipping point in our history

It is up to us what happens next. None of what we have done is irreconcilable, but that may not always be the case. If you read accounts of what led up to the revolution, or the civil war, it is easy to draw parallels to the years prior to military violence erupting and today. Tensions are high. History shows that one conflict can lead to the unleashing of emotions that cannot be “put back in the bottle” so to speak.

As for me, I can be just an inflammatory as the next guy. I try to aim it at people who primarily agree with me, to show them when they are not taking another’s point of view seriously. But, I am just as guilty of adding fuel to the fire as anyone. In recent days, I have begun to rethink that. I am trying to find ways to challenge lack of understanding while promoting peaceful exchange.

In most cases, we are not that far apart from each other in our understanding of what we ultimately want. We want a world where success is possible, where personal freedom is protected, where life is valued and selfish, abusive excess is rare. This can never happen as long as we see ourselves as two sides of a coin, as diametrically opposed to each other.

We need to look at desired outcomes

Rather than fighting and debating tactics, perhaps if we really started telling the story of the world we want to see, we might be surprised by how much we agree on. Right now, we operate in a very narrow window of possibilities, where oppositional thinking pits us against each other. (if you don’t agree with me, you must agree with them) But, in reality, the ways forward are limitless.

Imagine the world the way you want it to be and try letting go of the way to get there. It’s tough. We all think we know what should happen. But, if we can strive to create the circumstances we want to live in, while allowing others to create theirs, maybe we can find a new way of settling our disagreements. By sharing our dream of the world we want, and finding those common threads, maybe we can all find some ways to work together.

Let’s agree to do this

Let’s try to be kind. Everyone has a hard life. Let’s strive not to escalate conflict, whenever possible. Let’s fight for what we believe in with well-reasoned arguments and proposals of real solutions, instead of political diatribes and platitudes. Let’s think for ourselves and speak from the heart about how we can make the world a better place and let’s agree to listen and really hear someone out, then decide whether we agree or not, rather than bring all of our preconceptions into every single argument. You can always get angry later, but once you have lost your cool, it is often too late to go back.

This Conversation Just Happened with Two Cops About the Twelve Year Old Shot Dead for Carrying a BB Gun.

2014-11-30T14:25:00.001-08:00

This conversation just took place on FB between myself, my brother in Dallas, three individuals I do not know but two who revealed themselves as cops. They appear to be with the Oklahoma City Police Department. Please read it, share it, comment on it and spread it. This is no aberration. This is how the majority of officers think these days. This is the problem, the face of the problem and the reason that I cannot blame the looters in Ferguson. Their actions made no sense, but these two right here are the people who show up at your house to harass you when you have a problem.

If I face any backlash in the form of extra police attention from this, I wanted to make sure that the entire conversation was recorded. Please put it out so that it cannot be destroyed or edited. I am sending it to their department.

Mark Morris

November 26 at 3:01pm ·

Watch the last 60 seconds. He was 12, if you watch the beginning, he is just a kid in a park, goofing off. Yes, that is a BB gun in his hand. This officer intended to shoot him before he even left the vehicle. Why? The dispatch officer was told twice it was a kid and the gun probably was not real. Never relayed to this rookie. http://www.cleveland.com/…/cleveland_police_officer_shot_1.…

Cleveland police officer shot Tamir Rice immediately after leaving moving patrol car

Cleveland police showed the video of the Tamir Rice shooting Wednesday during a press briefing.

cleveland.com

Like Like · · Share

Tim Morris likes this.
2 shares
Tim Morris This deserves some protesting for sure.

16 hrs · Like
Tim Morris What kind of idiot felt like this would be a proper follow up to the original story? http://www.cleveland.com/.../tamir_rices_father_has...

Tamir Rice's father has history of domestic violence

Leonard Warner has three domestic violence...

cleveland.com

16 hrs · Like · Remove Preview
Tabitha Davis Oh well since his dad is a scumbag that makes it justifiable to kill a 12 yr old! What is wrong with people?!

2 hrs · Like
Tyler Duncan It doesn't matter if it was "probably fake". That is an observation of a passerby. This is a justified shooting. You people are idiots for thinking the officer just wanted to murder a kid. Quit Monday morning arm chair quarter backing these split second decisions you will never have to make. Leave law enforcement to professionals
There is a reason you are not police officers.

2 hrs · Like · 6
Tyler Duncan Why was the orange tip taken off of the gun? I have seen many armed robberies conducted with fake guns, the fact of it being fake doesn't make the robbery disappear.

2 hrs · Like · 3
Steve Morris Tyler you're a fucking idiot. If you think this was justified, you probably need to be locked up for the safety of everyone around you.
Leaving it to the professionals is how we got to this point. Fuck you. Seriously, fuck you.

1 hr · Like · 1
BJ Williams Marsh Ditto what Steve said

1 hr · Like
Jim Lind · Friends with BJ Williams Marsh
What I don't get is steve you have a viable argument that you muttled with the whole fuck you thing I suppose this will warrant a fuck you to me as well but it is what it is.

1 hr · Like · 1
Kip McEntire · Friends with Steve Morris and 1 other
I'm starting to think we need a non-lethally-armed police force for (almost) all patrolling and initial calls. Only after they have confirmed that an armed officer is needed can they call for one.

1 hr · Like · 1
Tabitha Davis Tyler your right I don't understand having to make a split second decision that's life or death. I'm sure that's very stressful but it doesn't justify this kind of outcome. These situations are becoming more common. That's not ok. Do I believe this officer just wanted to take a kids life? No probably not but that doesn't change the fact that he pulled up and immediately fired. When I first heard this story I thought hey the gun looked real. Perhaps this was an unfortunate misunderstanding. After all if the officer said put your hands up and the kid reached for a gun what was the officer supposed to do.... ? but watching this video that's not at all what happened. Unless the audio to this video could prove something I'm just not thinking of this was not justified. You could say the officer made a mistake but I can't agree that it was justified. He was a kid acting stupid like kids often do. That does not justify him being shot.

1 hr · Edited · Like
Kip McEntire · Friends with Steve Morris and 1 other
Mark Morris: Sorry for posting here if I shouldn't be. This just showed up in my timeline since Steve is a friend.

Jim: To be (kind of) fair, I don't think Steve was making an argument, so much as he was condemning Tyler for making a stupid argument.

Tabitha: Are these situations more common, or are we just learning about them more now?

1 hr · Like · 1
Tyler Duncan Ha. Not carry guns to calls. Right when I think you people can't get any more idiotic. Let's take away police rights to protect themselves. I'm going home after my shift. You nut jobs can go join your friends in Ferguson.

1 hr · Like · 4
Tyler Duncan I am a police officer. I have more training then you could imagine. I have been in shootings before. So yes I think I know more than you guys that are spoon fed by the media.

1 hr · Like · 5
Jacob Cole How about we blame the dumb shit parents of this kid who didn't teach him not to point guns, even fake ones, at cops.

1 hr · Like · 8
Bryan David A stupid argument? You mean an educated point of view? This is the most intense thing you tools probably do in your whole life. You've never had someone shoot at you in a split second. I hope you never do because you're not going to make it and neither are those around you. You're a bunch of imbeciles lacking the balls to face criminals in the real world. This isn't the movies you fools. Multiple calls were made where this kid was pointing the gun at people and they thought it was real. The officer has no legal duty to be shot at first or allow others to die before engaging a threat. The stupidity here asserts children aren't capable of shooting others. How many teenagers and even younger kids have been involved in school shootings? This isn't just a "BB gun." It is a replica of a real gun and side by side looks the same. They have real hello kitty pattern firearms. Keep drinking the koolaid dick weasels. Lord knows you don't have the balls or intelligence to handle half a shift in an officer's shoes. Cowards

1 hr · Like · 6
Tyler Duncan But I'm the real idiot for debating a stay at home mom and a tiny store owner about law enforcement. Something they believe should be like the Andy Griffith show

1 hr · Like · 2
Tyler Duncan Finally some intelligent beings have joined the conversation

1 hr · Like · 3
Bryan David Yeah kip, that's brilliant. We have that capability and always know when someone has a gun, knife, bat etc. SMH the stupidity of some people seriously makes me doubt there isn't a hospital dropping babies on their heads. Kip, check the back of yours.

1 hr · Like · 1
Bryan David Again Steve, enjoy the safety of being behind a computer. It's the most dangerous thing you do.

1 hr · Like · 2
Steve Morris I grew up in neighborhoods where little kids carried real guns in their wastebands. I've been standing a few feet away when a store owner chased a shoplifter out of his store by firing a 45 pistol toward him multiple times. I've hit the ground more than once when automatic fire broke out on my block. None of that could possibly justify the cowardly actions of this cop. The fact that you think it takes balls to drive up and shoot a child makes me sad. You're both pathetic.

You want a real argument?
A) It's not illegal to remove the orange tip from an airsoft or other toy gun.
B) The cop placed himself directly in danger with no options. That was sheer incompetence.
C) The kid has the same rights as the officer under the constitution, and any cop who feels they have or need extra rights should not be a cop because they're a coward.
D) They should have talked to him first. They could have done that from the safety of their car at a distance.
E) They should have evaluated to see if they could use non-lethal force before rolling up and shooting him.

1 hr · Edited · Unlike · 2
Tyler Duncan Steve morris I wish I could arrest you for larceny of air. Its amazing how brain dead people like you waste good air.

1 hr · Like · 3
Bryan David No Steve it is not illegal. Taking that fake firearm without the orange top and shooting someone even if it is a BB gun is still considered assault and battery with a dangerous weapon.

You're so full of crap Steve. Having the balls to roll up with an active shooter or someone which could potentially be one takes courage. Again, stop being ignorant and ignoring the fact children are shooting/murdering people in our current world. Your ignorance astounds me!!!!

By your suggestions and implications, you hitting the ground was cowardly. We go into those situations voluntarily. We aren't the Girl Scouts laying on the ground when crap hits the fan. Cowards like you are on the ground crying like the little bi@$&es they are.

1 hr · Like · 2
Jacob Cole If you don't like the cops call a Crack head

1 hr · Like · 1
Bryan David For Steve and his counterparts

59 mins · Like · 1
Steve Morris Stop ignoring the fact that cops are shooting and murdering people.

59 mins · Like · 1
Steve Morris Bryan, did the kid shoot someone?

58 mins · Like · 1
Bryan David Steve, show me where the constitution states you have the right to point firearms at individuals. Also, it is an officer's job to go I to that situation and place himself in harms way/eliminate the threat if necessary.....especially after receiving 911 calls someone is pointing a firearm at people in the park

57 mins · Like · 2
Bryan David Also, thank you for demonstrating your ignorance on cars as cover Steve. The vast majority of parts of police cars do not stop pistol ammunition.

56 mins · Like · 3
BJ Williams Marsh I'm afraid of Americans....

56 mins · Like
Tyler Duncan Steve have you considered that a cop is shot and killed almost every day in america.

55 mins · Like · 3
Bryan David Also, it is impossible to differentiate fake guns with real guns like that, especially imitation BB guns you buffoon.

55 mins · Like · 1
Tyler Duncan No because it doesn't fit your agenda. I think you should move to mexico. Their police are not as on top of things. I bet its really safe

54 mins · Like · 3
Hillary Moesinger Harris Obviously without being there or hearing any audio it's hard to say exactly what took place those few seconds, but in defense of the cop, the boy was walking towards their car... the article also says that the cops weren't told the "it's probably a fake" comment that the caller made.

54 mins · Like · 3
Bryan David Steve, defense is not murder. You're freaking ignorant. If I took a gun into a mall and started pointing it at people, that does not mean I'm not a threat immediately justifiable to be eliminated if I haven't shot someone. Seriously, how stupid are you!!!!?

53 mins · Like · 2
Steve Morris You're asserting that cops have rights that ordinary citizens don't have to protect themselves.

I didn't mean to imply the car was completely safe, just far safer than 3 feet from the suspect.

You're abysmally ignorant of how dangerous it actually is to do your job. 27 cops out of nearly a million were killed last year.

52 mins · Like · 1
Steve Morris Waving a gun in a crowded mall is not nearly the same as waving a BB gun in a park, even if the BB gun looks real.

48 mins · Like · 1
Bryan David Bahahahaha Steve just said only 27 cops were killed last year!!! Over 43 have been killed by gunfire alone this year not including federal agents!!!!

Where did I say cops have rights citizens don't? Are you ignorant!!? Or do you just lack any and all forms of reading comprehension/understanding of the law?

A conceal carry holder could legally shoot someone in self defense the second that someone pointed a gun at them in this situation.

48 mins · Like · 3
Bryan David Fake or real!!!!

47 mins · Like · 1
Mark Morris Tyler Duncan you, sir, are full of shit. Here are the stats, and this is including officers who died from every single cause in the line of duty. Line of Duty Deaths: 105
9/11 related illness: 1
Aircraft accident: 1
Automobile accident: 25
Boating accident: 1
Bomb: 1
Drowned: 2
Duty related illness: 1
Electrocuted: 1
Fall: 4
Fire: 1
Gunfire: 30
Gunfire (Accidental): 2
Heart attack: 10
Motorcycle accident: 4
Stabbed: 2
Struck by vehicle: 8
Training accident: 2
Vehicle pursuit: 4
Vehicular assault: 5

47 mins · Like
Steve Morris That 27 is an FBI statistic, moron. From 2013. The claim that a cop is shot and killed nearly every day is blatantly false.

46 mins · Unlike · 1
Tyler Duncan I'm done with this one. Valid proof that you can't fix stupid. But as long as tim stays behind his computer defending the world against in justice on issues he has no clue about.we will all be safe.

46 mins · Like · 3
Mark Morris Meanwhile, by various stats, which are not kept officially, the citizen toll for cop gun deaths in 2013 was between 460 (the police say) and nearly 600 according to media sources.

46 mins · Like
Bryan David OMG what part of imitation BB guns are the same do you not get? It is labeled a deadly weapon in that sense. Even if it's not shot and is just strictly imitational, it is the same damn thing! They had multiple 911 calls he was pointing it at people you tool!

45 mins · Like
Steve Morris I agree that this conversation may be proof that you can't fix stupid. Unfortunately stupid people are drawn to police work likes flies on shit.

45 mins · Like · 1
Mark Morris Tyler Duncan this site is a police honor roll, care to dispute it? Line of Duty Deaths: 105
9/11 related illness: 1
Aircraft accident: 1
Automobile accident: 25
Boating accident: 1
Bomb: 1
Drowned: 2
Duty related illness: 1
Electrocuted: 1
Fall: 4
Fire: 1
Gunfire: 30
Gunfire (Accidental): 2
Heart attack: 10
Motorcycle accident: 4
Stabbed: 2
Struck by vehicle: 8
Training accident: 2
Vehicle pursuit: 4
Vehicular assault: 5

45 mins · Like · 1
Mark Morris Line of Duty Deaths: 1059/11 related illness: 1Aircraft accident: 1Automobile accident: 25Boating accident: 1Bomb: 1Drowned: 2Duty related illness: 1Electrocuted: 1Fall: 4Fire: 1Gunfire: 30Gunfire (Accidental): 2Heart attack: 10Motorcycle accident: 4Stabbed: 2Struck by vehicle: 8Training accident: 2Vehicle pursuit: 4Vehicular assault: 5

45 mins · Like · 1
Bryan David No you dumbass!!! It is from the officer down page for the current fiscal year....DUMBASS

44 mins · Like
Hillary Moesinger Harris Steve I think we'd be in a more dangerous place if the offenders have to fire first before the cops or everyday citizens are allowed to defend themselves... You best believe if I ever get attacked in a parking lot at night I won't be asking any questions... just saying.

43 mins · Like · 2
Mark Morris Tyler Duncan that comes from a list with names, and causes, here: http://www.odmp.org/search/year?year=2013 which is way more than they are willing to do for the citizens they execute without even charging them with a crime, forget trial. Meanwhile, the actual deaths by court mandated execution are under 50 per year.

2014

So far this year, 105 law enforcement officers have died in the line of duty.

odmp.org

42 mins · Like · 1 · Remove Preview
Bryan David Yeah Mark, the cops in those instances should have allowed themselves to be shot instead. You're so stupid!!!! An officer has no legal duty to allow himself to be fired upon first. Stick to watching movies and giving each other hand jobs mark and Steve.

By the way, Officer Duncan had someone fire at him when he exited his car and tried to talk to them. Your suggestions have been proved ignorant!!!

42 mins · Like · 2
Steve Morris Hillary, I never said they need to wait for the suspect to fire first.

41 mins · Like · 1
Bryan David Yeah, shooting someone after they pull a gun on you is so wrong and murder. Thank God you idiots work in grocery stores or whatever you do. You would be dead otherwise.

40 mins · Like · 1
Mark Morris Bryan David I was responding to the idiotic statement that one cop per day gets shot and killed. More like less than one very 10 days, meanwhile, more than one citizen per day continues to lose their lives. Am I arguing that all of these were innocently minding their own business when they were shot down in cold blood, hell no. I hear of cases all the time where cops shoot someone justly. This video, in my opinion, does depict that at all.

40 mins · Like · 1
Bryan David Yes you did Steve!!! This has been your argument the entire time. They should try to talk someone down who is armed with a gun first. They have no legal right to shoot etc.

39 mins · Like · 2
Mark Morris Okay, wow, great use of language there Bryan David. Where is your statistical information, or at least one fricking intelligent statement, instead of this BS cops are always in the right crap.

38 mins · Like · 1
Steve Morris Never said they have no legal right. They absolutely should assess and try to talk the person down. The only time they should come in with guns blazing is when the suspect is already shooting.

38 mins · Unlike · 2
Mark Morris BTW, even one cop shot dead while legitimately doing their duty is one too many. But, you have to look at both sides of the equation to find a solution.

38 mins · Like · 1
Mark Morris There was no one else in that park. If you want to get right down to it, the cops puts themselves "in harm's way", except, it was a freaking toy!

36 mins · Like · 1
Bryan David Mark, wtf are you talking about dumb ass!?!!! My whole argument has been intelligent. Yours is based on not an officer does from gunfire daily. This is due to training you imbecile!!!! Officers are fired on all the time. Just because they don't die etc doesn't mean it doesn't happen.

36 mins · Like · 1
Bryan David BB guns and BB guns designed as imitationals are not just toys. There is a reason a convicted felon can't legally own imitationals or BB guns. If you shot someone with a BB gun, you would be charged ADW felony

32 mins · Like · 1
Hillary Moesinger Harris I get what Mark is saying about the cops probably should have pulled up farther away, then maybe they could have said something to the kid, but considering the kid had been pointing the bb gun at people previously, he might very well have pointed it at them anyways, you can't see his hands when the cops pull up... I think the parents should really be blamed here, they obviously haven't taught their child gun safety...

13 mins · Edited · Like · 3
Bryan David http://m.wave3.com/wave/pm_/contentdetail.htm?contentguid=

BB guns are just toys. Let's forget the imitational argument. They can't kill people....See More

WAVE

m.wave3.com

31 mins · Like · Remove Preview
Bryan David http://m.nydailynews.com/.../calif-woman-killed-boyfriend...

Calif. woman killed by boyfriend in bizarre BB gun accident

A California mom-of-two was shot dead by her own...

nydailynews.com

30 mins · Like · Remove Preview
Bryan David http://www.cbs46.com/.../1-year-old-child-shot-with-bb...

1-year-old child shot with BB gun dies, father charged

An 18-month-old toddler was killed after being shot in...

cbs46.com|By Mandi Milligan, Terrance Kelly

30 mins · Like · Remove Preview
Will Higgins This whole argument is horseshit. If the kid wasn't waiving a realistic looking toy gun in public in the first place, then this wouldn't have happened. Where were this kids parents, why was he allowed to have a BB gun or anything else for that matter without supervision? Why was he waiving it in public? If the gun were bright green then this would have been wrong, but it wasn't, it was black.

29 mins · Like · 5
Bryan David http://m.wmctv.com/wmctv/pm_/contentdetail.htm...

Do I need to continue posting examples

WMCTV

WMCTV

m.wmctv.com

29 mins · Like · Remove Preview
Tyler Duncan Just give up Bryan. They will be grateful one day when they have to call police to bail them out of a situation. When their cowardice kicks in they will understand. Until then we should let them jump on the popular bandwagon and act oppressed like they live in Nazi Germany.

28 mins · Like · 4
Mark Morris CARRYING A BB GUN IS NOT CAUSE FOR THE DEATH PENALTY TO BE ENFORCED AND IDIOTS WHO CAN SHRUG THIS SHIT OFF AS PERFECTLY REASONABLE ARE WHAT IS WRONG WITH THIS DAMN COUNTRY. Tyler, I pray to God a mouth breather like yourself will never stand between me and the threat of a twelve year old boy with a bb gun. You are a prime example of the problem. You believe you would be justified in killing this child. May God have mercy on your sick, sick, soul. We are oppressed, by jack booted thugs like yourself, which you have proven to be, because your concern is definitely not with the citizenry you swore an oath to protect, or the constitution you swore an oath to defend. I am afraid, that in the end, the likes of you will turn out to be right, not because you are, but because the rest of us will refuse to think as if it is okay to slaughter you at our own discretion. You keep doing what they tell you, like a good little lap dog, and you will find yourself policing in a state that makes Nazi Germany look like a Summer camp, but come to think of,it, that seems to be okay with you. Why don't you occasionally pick up a history book and realize that you cannot have a police state with free citizens in it. The two are mutually exclusive.

19 mins · Edited · Like · 1
Will Higgins Mark, I guess you are a authority on Nazism. Because last time I checked we weren't sending people to death camps. If you think that you are living in a police state, then by all means move to somewhere that you believe is free.
This isn't about nazi's, authoritarianism, or even race. It's about ignorance, and that's it.

12 mins · Like · 3
Bryan David ^^^^i thought I smelled shit, it was just Mark continuing to lie and go on and on with his psycho babble BS. Thank God he hides behind the safety of a computer and never faces anything in real life. What a coward!!! Mark, if you ever defend your family after someone points an imitation gun at them or a BB gun, which legally is considered a deadly weapon, I hope I'm on your jury. I also hope if someone "fake attacks" someone and you step in, you're charged with every charge there is. You're an inexperienced imbecile with no life experience. You give humans a bad name.

Mark, you've inspired me to do a study on regressive evolution. After reading your posts I'm convinced we as humans are regressing.

12 mins · Like · 2
Bryan David Nahhhhh how could his concern be with the citizenry after he would drive up into a situation where someone is pointing what looks like a 9,.40, .45 handgun without thinking about his own safety. I mean, he should do what you do and call 911 then hide!

11 mins · Like · 2
Bryan David Mark's brain does indeed hang from his chin

10 mins · Like · 1
Bryan David Hey I have an idea, take a screen shot of Mark's business and spread the word it is ran by a man with an anti police agenda!

Just now · Like
Tyler Duncan Apparently mark is a blogger, he is posting this on his site and editing stuff out saying that we are examples of aggressive cops.

Just now · Like

Things We Need to Do About Killer Cops

2014-11-25T06:23:00.001-08:00

Today is a tense day in America. The grand jury in Ferguson Missouri found that Officer Wilson was justified in shooting his victim to death, and riots have been raging over night. There are some things that I think need to be said to our children to turn this situation around. Even if Darren Wilson was completely within the confines of the law, and his duty as an officer, a citizen's death should mean more than it does.

We Should be Keeping Track

Everywhere that you look for statistics on police shootings, you find the same opening phrase: It is difficult to determine how many die in officer involved shootings, because no official records are kept regarding these statistics. What? How is that even possible? With all of the things we can track, down to how many gallons of “fossil fuels” were dispensed by state, county or city! How is it that human life has become so cheap.

The law must protect everyone, even “thugs” deserve not to be shot down in the street unless it is necessary.
There is no excuse for there not to be a national database on this statistic. It isn't hard, it gets recorded, but no nation record? Come on, this should be a no brainer!
A national move to correct this problem should all ready be under way. I fear that this may be a ploy to show local policing as inadequate to pave the way for a federal program. I don't know why else we haven't done something before now.

Teach Your Children Conflict Resolution

It is important that someone begins to teach kids to de-escalate potentially violent situations. In too many cases, however, these shootings show no engagement between the officers and the victim, just arrival, and shots fired without any questions being asked.

Teach your kids that a casket is a lot harder to get out of than a jail cell, and that they need to comply, quietly, without questioning. I hate this, because everything in me wants to teach my kids to resist the intrusion, but cops will shoot you. They will!
If your kid wants to be a cop, you better make damn sure they learn to keep calm. Put them through whatever you have to, to get them trained! Cops are far too often the ones to introduce a hostile attitude, which gets a perfectly normal response. I sincerely doubt Darren Wilson was polite when he asked Brown to stop in the street.
Do not initiate contact with an officer unless absolutely necessary. Even if you don't get shot in the face, like Brown did, it can go wrong in so many ways. Just don't do it.

Change the Law

The City of Houston has had 88 officer involved shooting deaths since 2006, and not one indictment of an officer. The quote this morning was that Wilson, “Followed the law, and followed his training”. It seems that the general attitude in the vast, and overwhelming majority of these cases is that the officers did exactly what they were trained to do, and that it was within the law.

If this is the training, then something needs to be changed, 600+ per year (someone's best guess, since no stats are compiled) is too many bodies, to give some perspective, you have a better chance of being shot by a cop, than being struck by lightning, three times more likely!
There are countries where police violence is unheard of and we have the worst record of any first world country. ( I say this, because, who really knows what's happening in some places, resources are not spent on statistics) This should not be the case. We are not an outlaw wasteland.
Officers traditionally have not been held accountable for their violence on citizens and frankly, that is disgusting and inexcusable. They should be held to a higher standard. Police should not investigate their own shootings. There are enough police agencies to at least have another department or agency conduct that review.

Stop Thinking You Know What Happened

If you are not a part of the problem, or the solution, it probably is not your business. We all have opinions about this case, I have mine, but that is not what this post is about! I think the problem is common enough it deserves a solution. But, I don't know what happened here. I trust that the Grand Jury answered with their conscience, based on the evidence that was presented to them.

Focus on solutions, not the problem. Focusing on the problem, leads to burning down gas stations. Focusing on the problem leads to anger and violence.
Focusing on the solution leads to reasoned conversation, writing books that present alternatives, studies of the problem that help find specific issues.
We need something positive to say. We are not going to do away with police officers, but we need to support them, while still holding them accountable and asking them to remember that they are citizens too.

I am sure that if I were an officer, dealing primarily with the problem people in my community, it would be easy to start seeing targets instead of faces. I know that. It does not, however, change the fact that the police should be here to reduce violence, not incite it. I know from my own limited interactions with police, fueled by what, from my wife's description I would describe as “Serial Killer Resting Face” that I have experience officers that were much more hostile than the situation warranted. This needs to change. Whatever it is that is putting this pressure on them, has not always been there. This is a fairly new occurrence and we all know it.

Is Today's Church a Counterfeit? I Think So, Here's Why.

2014-11-24T06:40:00.001-08:00

I took today's post straight from a Facebook conversation with a friend of mine. He had posted a link to an article with this quote in his post Looking for a perfect church? "If you find a perfect church and join it, be assured that it won't be perfect anymore."--David Platt

To which I replied: But what if what we call church is a counterfeit, all the way around?

He asked me to elaborate. I did. Here is my elaboration. Moral of the story? Don't ask me to respond on FB unless you are really ready for it. LOL

I am sure he was.

I start from this premise: Jesus said he came to establish a kingdom not built with hands. He describes a living, organic, organism with not visible earthly head. His very life modeled a dependency on God that would eschew budgets, or permanent homes for this congregation. The men who were most deeply effected by His teaching, set out to build something that did not own real estate, except possibly when the lived in communal circumstances and sold their possessions and had everything in common. Now having been questioned by the Pharisees as to when the kingdom of God was coming, He answered them and said, "The kingdom of God is not coming with signs to be observed; 21nor will they say, 'Look, here it is!' or, 'There it is!' For behold, the kingdom of God is in your midst."

He was indicating that this kingdom could not be located. Unless we are to believe that somehow, the kingdom, and the "congregation" ( I am beginning to hate the word 'church') are two completely separate entity, then I say that there is no way that what we have built and called church is in no way related to the teachings of Jesus.

Couple this with the fact that so many "christians" are blood thirsty and greedy and idolatrous, not just in the secrecy of their own hearts, but they openly support political ideals that build these things into the very fabric of our society, and there is one clear test. …16"You will know them by their fruits. Grapes are not gathered from thorn bushes nor figs from thistles, are they? 17"So every good tree bears good fruit, but the bad tree bears bad fruit. 18…A good tree cannot produce bad fruit, nor can a bad tree produce good fruit. 19"Every tree that does not bear good fruit is cut down and thrown into the fire.…

If this is true of the individual life, it must needs be true of the communal life, or institution as well. Look at the fruit of the teachings that have made up the "church". They are not concerned with justice, mercy, or humility, which are the three keys required to please God. They do not live a life of faith in the creator that shuns dependence on man-made structures and institutions, and they have not been a preserving salt, or a mercifully exposing light in society."You are the salt of the earth. But if the salt loses its saltiness, how can it be made salty again? It is no longer good for anything, except to be thrown out and trampled underfoot.

At what point do we cut down the tree and toss out the salt and start over? I think we passed it several generations ago, maybe not even in recent history. Once that "organism" became more concerned with its own preservation than it was with the preservation of its own members, or sacrificially loving the society around it, it ceased to resemble those believers who were first called christians by outsiders because of their extreme sacrificial love for each other. Imagine that. A group of Jesus' followers, who so exemplified the life of Christ that it caused the world around them to give them a name that was not a derogatory one.

What Ever is Going on in Your Life, You are Attracting it

2014-11-21T08:46:00.001-08:00

The law of attraction has been stated in many different ways. The most well known probably comes from the teachings of Jesus, you reap what you sow. It is the idea that you get out of life what you put into it. Most people stop there, they think of their overt, public actions towards others, and assume that if they do okay on that part, they are in good shape.

There is More Than What You See

There is a lot more to it. In fact, the law of attraction is at work in your life, right this instant, as you read this blog post. As you sort these words and ideas into little piles to keep, not keep, think about later, or even ignore, you are setting up a pattern of events that will ripple out through your day, your week, your month, and the rest of your life in tiny little echoes.

We get what we think on, always, every time
The universe does not distinguish negatives from positives, this is why focusing on what you do want is so important, because focus is focus, and you get what you think on
Right now, you are thinking, and those thoughts will bear fruit, good, bad or indifferent

Every single word you say, every thought you have, every action you take, shapes this bag of seeds that you sow. If you are currently reaping something that you don't like the fault, I assure you, can be tracked back to something you focused on. It may have been something you feared, it may be something you hated, but you focused on it, long and hard, with a lot of emotion, and it attracted like thoughts, which turned into events that manifested in your universe. All of it.

You Don't Like it, But it's True

I know this is hard to accept, particularly if it is the first time anyone has ever said this highly offensive thing to you, that you are responsible, on some level, for even the shittiest thing that ever happened to you. But, it is true. What the universe cannot do is control how you respond to it. You will dwell on this, and you will either push it away, or you will accept it. Here's what you do.

Watch. Look for the next few days at your life, notice events and how you feel about them.
Writer them down, keep track, but don't judge anything for at least a week
Track everything, down to the small details, everything that happens

Once you have some data, look at it. Write down what you thought about each of these incidents, before they became a part of your reality. You thought about them, didn't you? On some level, you either loved it, feared it, hated it, studied it, questioned it, the interactions have endless possibilities, but, you focused on, and attracted, every bit of it.

Here is the fun part of this experiment. Change the way you think. I mean it. Make a conscious decision to think differently about the negative, or uncomfortable experiences. Don't ignore them, but find a way to either focus on the positive aspects, or replace the thought with something positive, but change it. Now, set your mind on the things you want. Not what you don't want. When it comes to stuff you don't like, but can't get around, try this.

Think of the best possible outcome
Say thankyou for that outcome, yes, even though it hasn't happened yet
Be specific about what you want, say it out loud if that makes it more real, or write it down, but make sure you remember it.

Now, watch this again. Look at your life and track it, keeping that positive frame of mind for one week. Write down all of the events of your life as you did before, just keeping track, not judging. When you have a week's worth of data, compare that week to the week before. You will be surprised at the difference. You will begin to be the architect of your own life. You will not experience everything you want to, some things will still happen that you do not like, but you will notice a change for the better.

The more you practice, the better you will become. You may never, in this life, be able to attract everything you want. It does not always work that way. There may always be things that fear, or doubt, will make impossible for you. The more you succeed at getting the life you want, the more you will want to succeed, and the fewer doubts and crippling fears will creep in to rob you of your desires.

I Think Thanksgiving Might Just be the Most Important American Holiday Ever

2014-11-20T09:35:00.000-08:00

Halloween costumes come down, Christmas lights go up, with the obligatory Pilgrim sandwiched in between for good measure. The one holiday of the year, that should mean the most to us in this particular place in time, when the vast majority of us in this country have more than we need for mere survival, gets about as much attention as Olympic Badminton.

Welcome back I know some of you just now Googled Olympic Badminton to make sure I wasn't making things up, and just like that little holiday between Halloween and Christmas, commonly referred to as Turkey Day (don't say it, I believe I have reached a stage of enlightenment that will allow me to throat punch, straight through the internets) it surely does exist.

This day, first placed on the national calendar by none other than the right honorable Abraham Lincoln in 1863, by placing it on the fourth Thursday of every November, a day to give thanks, particularly to the creator, for the blessings we have like turkey, pumpkin pie,football, cranberry sauce, eggnog, mashed potatoes, stuffing.....( I jest, but that is a primary focus, unfortunately)

Since then, there has been a near cataclysmic slide into consumerism from Halloween, until Christmas, and lest you think that this is a fairly modern thing, it stayed that way until one fateful day in 1939 when good old Franklin D. Roosevelt (you know the father of all that is socialist in America) in an uncharacteristically capitalist move, changed it to the third Thursday, to give greedy Americans more time to consume before the Christmas holiday. Congress forced the change back again in 1941, just in time for WW2!

So, there you have it, this particular holiday, without any specific religious observance of note to hang its hat on, had to wait nearly a century into the nation's childhood to be born, and has been nearly shoved aside on more than one occasion, by its nemesis, the American Consumer Market. Fast forward to 2015. There is some precedence for this Biblically speaking, and it comes from an odd place. Check out Deut chapter 12, bet you never heard this tithe sermon before, did you?

5 But you are to seek the place the Lord your God will choose from among all your tribes to put his Name there for his dwelling. To that place you must go; 6 there bring your burnt offerings and sacrifices, your tithes and special gifts, what you have vowed to give and your freewill offerings, and the firstborn of your herds and flocks. 7 There, in the presence of the Lord your God, you and your families shall eat and shall rejoice in everything you have put your hand to, because the Lord your God has blessed you.

So, although I personally think that a day of fasting would be more appropriate for a thanksgiving holiday, there is good evidence that God intended just this sort of thing, in fact it was done every third year and the whole tithe was spent on consumable party supplies!

As we approach what I believe to be one of the most sacred days in the year, a day, when, although not compelled by historical celebrations, we stop to give thanks, it is clear that this day is under attack. I think, rather than the thankfulness, and awareness of our amazing lives that ought to accompany us every day, we barely pause for a breath, when we ought to be stopping everything cold in its tracks for this momentous occasion.

All throughout scripture, we are constantly reminded that we ought to be thankful for what we do have, at least as thankful, as we are miffed about what we don't have. If there is any true magic in the world, Rhonda Byrne has uncovered it in her book, The Magic, which I totally and wholeheartedly recommend to anyone, without reservation, every human on this planet needs to read this and apply it. “It only takes a few minutes in the morning to use gratitude to Have A Magical Day by giving thanks for the events in your day ahead of time, but this one practice alone will change the way your entire day unfolds.”
― Rhonda Byrne, The Magic

The Magic is all about gratitude, and what it does in a life where it is practiced. Being thankful is such powerful magic, that you really cannot overestimate the changes that occur around you in every day, and in every thing, when you practice saying thank you!

So, I encourage you to stop. No shopping on Thanksgiving. So many of us complain about companies that are mean, and “force” employees to work through this Holiday. Bullshit, it's a free country. Quit, but don't say you were forced. Coerced, perhaps, but forced is another thing. But, if you believe that isn't okay, put your checkbook and your credit cards away, remember when stores were not open 24/7 and no computer could bring the things of life to your front door through almost no effort on your part, and take that time instead to literally count, every single thing in your life that is good. If you cannot get to at least five hundred, message me, I bet I can help your ungrateful ass get it right!

Why I am Still Afraid to Leave Church and Follow God

2014-11-15T15:28:00.002-08:00

I am afraid to leave Church. I look and look and cannot find almost any correlation between what exists and the community that Jesus describes, I have tried, believe me. But, even though I have come to the point where I am only attending worship a couple of times a month, there is something in me that makes me want it. Like a drug, that I know is not really good for me, isn't even giving me the high it used to, but I still have a need for it.

I tell myself that it is about wanting a community, that I would miss the fellowship, but to tell the truth, much of the “church fellowship” I have experienced in the last ten years has been anything but beneficial and much of it has ended poorly. I would like to say through no fault of my own, but I am prone to insist on certain Biblical standards, and when people are abused by an administration under one set of verses, while completely ignoring another set that they are violating, I have a tendency to speak up.

That is really not what I am trying to talk about with this post, however, so, let me see if I can get this started properly. While today's modern church, with its larger than life real-estate portfolio and 501c3 non-profit status, is not found in scripture, many of us were raised to believe that it was the Kingdom of God. That is a problem.

A friend shared an article last night that spoke of a group of believers who are fully committed to Jesus, but are leaving the church because it is not giving the opportunity they desire to minister to lost and hurting souls in the ways they feel called to minister. The article was aimed at telling pastors how to re-engage these people before they are lost forever. But, I don't think they need to re-engage, I think they need to get away and explore God! If this is you, don't let them lure you back in!

They are sick of authoritarian leadership built on seminary degrees, or right of succession, “plugging people in” where they think is best, while reserving major decisions about direction, funds and other resources to themselves. And I, for one, agree, but, even if it is only once a month, I can't seem to shake the habit,and (Again, for me) I have noticed there is a good bit of fear involved in that hesitancy. So, what are we afraid of?

We are Afraid of Abandoning our Faith

If you ask any American, mainstream, evangelical Christian, what makes you a Christian? Their answer is sure to include a few words about their “personal” relationship with Jesus. But, although we have an understanding that our door to conversation and relationship with God is an individual one, that we must walk through alone, we still feel that we need to the Church to help us maintain it.

Here are some teachings that I have been going through to sort out good from bad, that pertain to this.

I need to be under “authority”, although 1^st Samuel ch 8 kinda puts a big dent in this
We should not foresake the assembly, although, I think that meant something different then
I need a frame of reference for my “wroldview”

These things, although I believe much of what I was taught was false, are still lingering in my psyche.

We are Afraid of Being Judged

This is a huge one for many of us. It is something I have dealt with my whole life, the idea that I should live to avoid the “disapproval” particularly of my elders, and church leadership. But the truth is that:

Each man makes account for his own life (yeah, I know that one verse says they make account for us, but there's much more in there about personal responsibility)
I am accountable only to God for how I spend my time
I believe that there is no condemnation for me, as I am in Christ

This one probably less now than in the past for me personally.

We are Afraid of Being Shunned, or Worse Yet, “Evangelized”

We have all seen it, the person who “refuses to repent” and continues to “live in their sin” is turned away from, quoting a verse from Paul that no one really understands about handing them over to the Devil. Or, they put you on the “back-slidden” list and bug the crap out of you to come back, after all, the only reason to leave is because you're a prodigal, right?

The worst part of modern shunning is it is silent. There is no agreement between parties, they don't tell you you're out, they just stop calling, and fill in any place you took with someone else. This is probably the hardest part for many of us.

Can I still be right with God, and not in “fellowship” with a local congregation of believers?
Is it really worth losing all of my friends? (were they friends anyway, if you can lose them?)
Will I be able to relate to people outside of the Church setting?

I believe all three of these are clearly answered with a yes. It may take time but you will find you have extra time to do things you have always wanted, and as you think back, how much of what you spend time on in church settings is really about God anyway?

We are Afraid to Trust Our Own Heart to Hear God!

Scripture teaches that the Holy Spirit indwells each believer, and that He is our teacher. We know that God has talked to His followers down through the ages, in the still small voice of the heart, and Jesus told us we know His voice, and yet.....

We have been raised to believe that, although it was stated otherwise, we need professional guidance to find, interpret, and follow the will of God.

We worry that it is our own pride, or laziness, or whatever, and not God calling us
We worry that we will fall into sin if walk out the door
We worry that we will miss some blessing which can only be received in a “corporate” setting

These may all be legitimate concerns for some, but for most, these are deceptions too. This is the drug talking, telling you that you need it to live!

It's Scary Hearing God for Yourself

Now it's time for us to grow up and do something we should have been doing all along, actually hear God for our own lives! He will speak, He does speak, He is speaking and He will continue to Speak, whenever we listen, we hear it.

It will take some practice but you probably already noticed that church leaders have been making up crap as they went along for a long time now anyway, so don't sweat it.

God's promise is to never leave or forsake us
We can begin to truly see the Kingdom, maybe for the first time
We are free to act on what God is prompting, without waiting for human guidance, or permission.

Of course you should have relationships with others that you share this life with. Of course, you should ask God to be clear, and even wait for specific leading. That only makes sense, but you don't need anyone else to tell you that, or do it for you!

As with so many of my posts, I find that I am speaking to myself as much as I am to anyone else. Here is my encouragement, if you feel God calling you out, go! Go joyfully and freely, and do what He is showing you. Don't be afraid of associating with churches, or church members, they love Jesus too, but don't feel compelled, unless God is compelling you. Be at liberty to serve when, where, who, how and in what way He shows you with no apologies to anyone else, regardless of job title or number of followers.

Why Our Parents Made us go to Church

2014-11-14T06:44:00.002-08:00

I was thinking about something today, and I think we may have left something important behind when we updated worship a couple of decades back. I think I have finally realized why my Mother made sure we were in church at least three times a week, and it wasn't just because she was a Church of Christ minister's wife. No, as the mother of five boys and two girls, she needed it. She needed to have six hours a week where she knew, beyond a shadow of a doubt that we would exhibit our very best behavior!

Think of it, any of you who grew up in the pre-emergent Church, did you ever hear this threat? “You had better behave yourself, because this is God's house!” muttered quietly, with a threatening tone, through a clinched-teeth smile, as your mother's grip on your upper arm momentarily took on the quality of a giant bird of prey's talons, pinching down on that one single nerve that had the ability to momentarily paralyze your entire body, connecting directly to the fear center of the brain and imprinting a very powerful image of that same arm becoming the “Arm of God” to wreak havoc on your hind quarters if you dared to ignore the warning.

Some of you, who attend conservative, traditional churches may say, remember? My mother still does that, but now it's weird, because I'm thirty! Anyway, Moms, think of it, one day of the week (in my case twice on Sundays and midweek on Wed evenings, too) when you know for a fact they will be clean, dressed to your specifications, quiet, respectful and all in one place. It was a mother's dream. So, I wonder, did we gain anything in the exchange?

I get that it would be better to live in a world where threats were unnecessary, no child ever needed to be corrected and parents were eternally patient, but, we don't live there yet. I am not suggesting that the methods of the past were the best way of doing things, either, but I wonder if we have lost site of the real goal of that methodology?

I recently saw a buzzfeed article, shared by George Takei, that shared pictures of people's kids screaming and throwing themselves down on the ground. The title insisted that this behavior was hilarious. Do we really believe that? I have eight kids, and I have never, once thought that. Not that a baby's anger cannot occasionally be funny, but at four, five, six, or seven years of age, it loses something in the way of charm, and by the time they are thirty and throwing a fit when their non-fat, half-calf, high foam latte isn't hot enough, it has become a disturbing trend.

With my own children, we have tried to install this once concept in them to curtail this type of behavior. Other people matter. A lot. It really is not about creating tiny little robots, who never lose their cool. Trust me, my kids still get upset and tell me what they think about me on occasion. Mostly when their own behavior has earned them some restriction, that they were duly warned of, which they do not find (in their infinite twelve year old wisdom) “fair”.

At these times I am sorely tempted to recount the punishments of my own angst ridden teen years, when I was grounded once for the entire month of August for telling my mother to shut up, to prove to them how magnanimous I am as a parent, that their five minute tirade only earned them a week long restriction from television. Sometimes I do, but I digress.

Other people are important. They are precious, and when we allow our behavior to interrupt, disturb, insult, injure, or otherwise interfere with them, unnecessarily by making their environment inhospitable, we are wrong. That's right. It is not okay to throw fits in public. At any age. Not even when I occasionally use my superior verbal skills to shame a “sandwich artist” or sales clerk into correcting their horrendous behavior, it is not okay!

So, what do you do about it? I think, rather than debate what type of punishment is best, it is important for parents to understand that you have an obligation to raise, not children, but decent, caring, conscientious adults, that are productive members of the human race. ( I do not say society, because, currently, society could use more “appropriate” interruptions) It's your job. It's expected. It is the bare minimum requirement. Not keeping them out of jail, or off drugs, or not failing school. If you are shooting for this bar, you are too low, and it may be too late for yours. But it is still your job.

Yes, I am old school. Yea, I think this is a big deal, and I'll tell you why. Because, if you do not believe this, your kid is the sandwich artist, or sales clerk I referred to. They will bring havoc with them wherever they go, creating little hurricanes of self-centered, narcissistic, chaos. They will be bosses, who think that employees are there solely to make them rich. They will become office holders, who think it okay to make ordinances and laws, based on their own opinions, regardless of the effect on their constituents. Most importantly, they will become parents, who raise, indecent, inconsiderate and intolerable human beings, and so the cycle continues.

This is not meant to be an accusation of bad parenting. It really isn't. I have made plenty of mistakes as a dad. So did my parents. But, I think we are so ready to just find the easiest way these days. There are no shortcuts. Your kids not only need to know that you love them, but that you respect people around you, and you expect them to do the same. If this is a problem for you, trust me, your unrestricted child will find a world that is ready to restrict them in a million ways.

When I Talk to Myself, Here's What I say!

2014-11-13T06:38:00.000-08:00

I talk to myself, a lot. Yeah, I know that is suppose to be a bad thing, but I know myself better than anyone else does, and recently, I have found a way of doing this that actually seems to be helpful. The idea came to me from reading "The Artist's Way" (a book I highly recommend, by the way) the author said she asks herself questions in her journaling, and then thinks through her own response, putting herself at a distance, away from the chaos of circumstances, and writes out her answer.

This appealed to me for a couple of reasons; first, I have tried to start mentoring relationships in the past to ask these questions and have found that they typically do not end well. Then I feel abandoned, and fine myself further off track than before, but I still need advice. With my Mother gone from this life, my Dad in the Philippines, and most of the older generation of my family either gone on before, or scattered across the country, it is hard for me to find people further down the road who have a vested interest in my success.

Second, I give great advice. No, really, I can count at least a dozen people who have sough other careers, gone to school, started a business, found the love of their lives, and have said to me, "It was that thing you said." that made them move forward. But, I still feel stuck! So, I decided to try it, and I am not sure why I decided to share it here, but.....

Here is a little of what I have said to myself lately, mostly regarding work. I left a few names out, because my questions were personal, but I think you still get the gist. Turns out I give pretty good advice,

Hey, Mark, what do I need to ask xxxx about, or for, in this meeting today?

Start with telling him why you think he can help, tell him about the venues, and ask him to tell you what questions you should be asking. Let him steer the conversation. Don't do your usual, try to impress thing. This guy is the real deal. He could make or break this idea if he is interested in it. Do not expect anything. Remove getting a solution from your mind. There is no solution, there are only ideas.

How can I build up a resume' writing clientelle, Mark?

Build your website, write things about writing. Look for the opportunities, there are bigger things than resume's don't get stuck on that. Offer it, sure, it pays good, but you are not excited about resume's write what excites you in writing, and entrepreneurial stuff and law of attraction stuff. Keep it exciting for you, and just have fun. Don't post anything to make an impression and DO NOT DO ANY KEYWORD RESEARCH. That is the road to whoredom, the way to ruin writing for yourself. Keep it going, write every single day, at least once, whether you have anything to say, or not.

What should I do about the carpentry stuff, Mark?

Take what comes. Don't go looking for more right now. There are other opportunities right around the corner, this is where we make our successful break for our real destiny! Let your work speak for you. If you get referrals, handle them like the absolute pro you would be if you slowed down and focused solely on the work, not the money!

What do I need to do to make my destiny come faster?

You know the answer to this, I am not sure why you are asking. You stick to the program. You kick off that social media campaign you wrote, for every page you want to succeed, and you keep doing it, you don't stop. If you put up enough good stuff, without worrying about keywords, or trying to fit some audience, real, genuine stuff, it will happen! You will attract attention, you cannot fail. Good, rich content, shared regularly will get you there. Focus on making each piece you write the best it can be.

What do I do with the spiritual side of me?

You know this! Stop thinking of it as a “side” combine your life, do not compartmentalize. Decompartmentalization is the only way to be a whole human being!

Hey, Mark, I need to write another industry application for xxxxxxxx. What should I say about self publishing and digital publishing?

Tell them how excited you are by the opportunity.

I need to make $500 today. What should I do?

You should stop changing plans, just because the need is urgent, wisdom dictates that prudent action is prudent action, regardless of the circumstances. Your moment is secure. Now, go secure your future and stop playing at this shit!

If you try this yourself, make sure you do it in private. One of my kids saw me doing it the other day, and apparently, I was using gestures and expressions, even though I was not vocalizing, as I typed. Let me know how that goes!

So, What are You Accepting as "Liberty" These Days?

2014-11-07T07:21:00.000-08:00

I have been challenged to think and study on the topic of Liberty recently and I am discovering some very powerful things about myself. When I started, I was operating under the assumption that this was a “fixable” problem with society, government and community, but the more I think about it, it is like joy and happiness, I can only truly be happy within myself. I can experience happiness communally with a group, only if I am already happy personally. I think the same is true for liberty. For me, at least, this is a problem of “me”. I must first set myself free, and give myself permission to be “at liberty”.

There is a lot of talk about waking people up these days, and I think this metaphor is appropriate in more ways than one. As a society we are a sleeping giant, or maybe it's better to say, “sleepwalking”. In order for that to change, each one has to awaken to liberty in their own lives. They must become free inside, in their minds, hearts and spirits, they must accept that this is the natural order of things, that this is their birthright.

As this begins to happen, it spreads, like so many things, through casual contact. The idea of liberty is so attractive to the human imagination, that when we perceive it in others, it almost immediately stirs up feelings in each of us. For some, it brings a longing. Those people are so close to waking up that it will take only a nudge to get them thinking and acting as liberty minded.

For some, it brings fear. If that is you, you must begin to unwind the layers of lies that encase your mind. You are rightfully equal to every other person on this planet, start there. For some, the “system” is so engrained in them that it sets off alarm bells, they feel threatened by the idea of personal liberty and can only conceive of a freedom that is granted to them by someone else.

The way to awakening, is to begin to reclaim all of those threads connecting things in your life, to yourself, to your work, your family, your worship, your government. De-compartmentalization is the key to enlightenment. Compartmentalizing is what has driven us to just "do our jobs" and separate so many parts of our life. You do not have a "social life" and a "work life" and a "family life" you have one life. They are all overlapping and interconnected in a million ways and thinking of them as separate is damaging. You cannot make choices about who you want to be, and what you want your life to be if everything is disconnected.

We have allowed a segmenting of our society, which begins at a very early age. We have believed myths about age that simply are not true in some cases, or bear much less weight than we have believed, in others. In school, we are divided by strict age guidelines, and are taught that association with one's “peers” is the right and sane thing. The idea that people one or two years from my own age are the best people for me to seek out to get the most out of life, seems absurd. It leads to a host of problems, but the segregation does not stop there.

We are divided by race, by class, by occupation, by political affiliation, geographic location, and leisure time activities. The categories become so narrow, that many of us could count on one hand the number of people we talk to on a regular basis that are unlike us in any appreciable way. We hang with people who dress like us, talk like us, listen to the same music, watch the same movies, and read the same books. Meanwhile, we are living on smaller and smaller islands created by all of these artificial divisions and walls.

Here is what I suggest. Make some new friends. Purposely go looking for people that are different from you. Yes, at first, you may think you have nothing to talk about, nothing “in common”, but you are 99.4% identical to every other single solitary human being on this planet! That's right, there is less than a one percent difference between you and Hitler! Or Ghandi! Or Abraham Lincoln, or Ghenghis Khan!

But you don't have to have anything in common to get along, or converse. In fact, all you need is one quality that all humans possess from birth: curiosity. That's right, the curiosity to know, what makes you feel, think and act like you do. Understanding. Getting to know someone who quite possibly disagrees with you on nearly everything you focus on every day takes nothing more than asking them a few questions. Here is what you will find, that .6% is exactly as small as it sounds. They have brothers and sisters, mothers, fathers, uncles, aunts, grandparents, favorite teachers, the list goes on.

Get out and reconnect yourself to your world. Don't let them segregate us anymore. It may feel that they are trying to force us into one big group, but before they do that, they want to break us apart as much as possible, because, if we trust each other, we may communicate, and if we communicate, ideas start to happen. When ideas really get going, things change, and real change is not something the system can handle.

Imagine: what if everyone just decided to stop believing in money? It is an illusion, there is no such thing as money. Think about it. Where is it? What is it? Not the paper that represents it, but the real money? There is none. Only 4% of the wealth that gets traded in our economy even exists as paper money, it's all just numbers in a big computer system. It all holds the value we give it. So, what if we stopped giving that value?

What if? At first it would be highly difficult, we have been used to this means of exchange for centuries, but think about it, what is money? Have you ever watched an apocalyptic movie, or even one set in the real world following a devastating war. What happens when someone finds a pile of cash? They laugh maniacally, or use it to light fires, but the understanding is, it is worthless. That is because it has been reduced to its true value.

So, if we stopped believing in it, would we still go to work at the same jobs? Would we still make the same choices? What if, instead, our wealth was based on what we actually contribute? (yes, I know, this is a huge fantasy with no basis in actual reality...yet) but what if? What would change for you? Whatever weight you just felt lifted from your shoulders by that thought, that is your chain. As Marley so aptly describes it to Scrooge in A Christmas Carol, the chain we forge in life. WE FORGE!

I know this post is getting long, and I may even be getting a bit lost here, but the system is only as strong as our belief in it. Truly. When we wake up to the whole world, and allow ourselves to see how all of the things we do, think, say and experience are connected, it begins to awaken in us a desire to improve that situation, and here is my point: I believe that longing is the proof, that somewhere, latent in the modern man in “civilized” society, is the knowledge, the belief, the certainty, that we were made to forge our own destiny, and that we can.

Get Out of My Selfie, You'll Ruin the Picture!

2014-11-04T12:20:00.003-08:00

I have spent a large part of my life in the public eye. No, that is not a comment on how successful I have been at it, but I have a talent for attracting attention, and things like being an actor, running your own business, and writing blog posts that piss people off will do that for you. Still, it sometimes comes as a shock to remember that I am not operating in a vacuum, that people around me really are seeing what I do, hearing what I say, and sometimes it is even impacting them.

This afternoon for example, a sweet friend of mine messaged me privately to ask about one of my last blog posts where I told of my adventures in a Guthrie McDonald's on a chilly Saturday Fall morning. Seems she was trying to find the meaning in it, and I wasn't really sure I had put any into it, or nothing specific, anyway. I said as much to her and tossed a comment about one thing that had occurred to me about it, which seemed to help, she replied with a message that kind of stopped me in my tracks, “Thanks, you are a role model to a lot of people, including me.”

I wanted to scream “NOOOO!” “Don't do it!” I am so messed up at times, that I don't know which way is up, and I sure as hell do not want to be responsible for somebody else's demise in following my example.

That was the second such incident today, the housekeeper at the home I am working on at the moment began to ask me questions about my faith, and I answered openly and honestly, telling her about my misgivings with institutional church and sharing some things from scripture about some things she said. Then she asked me what I thought of a particular church, which I won't mention here, but I spent quite a bit of time there, and my experience was not all good. She asked why, and I was very careful to temper my response. Not because I had anything to hide, but as Paul said, don't eat the meat if it's going to bother your unbelieving friend.

We don't live in a vacuum and this goes two ways, not only should we be aware, not afraid, but aware of how our words and actions effect those around us for good, or bad, but we should be watching out for their welfare as well.

As I sat in another McDonald's for lunch today, one of the managers on break read a story about a woman throwing her own six year old child off a bridge. I nearly wept thinking of what must have happened in this woman's life to lead to this. Of course a part of me wants to toss her over too, but I think, who was in her life that should have seen this coming and helped?

In our society today, we tend to see ourselves in isolation, it is the era of the selfie, we are so self reflective, most of us would not notice if the world really were burning down around us, unless it effected us directly. While I abhor government interference into situations such as the woman on the bridge, there has to be a solution. Where are we when the crap hits the fan in others' lives? Are we really too busy to help, or is it something else?

Is it this idea that if we offer to help, we become responsible somehow, they may look up to us. Like feeding a stray cat leads to owning a cat. Too many times I think we hesitate to do good out of a fear that it will cost us something more than a bag of groceries or an hour of our time. After all, I have my own agenda, and slowing down to help you might interfere with that.

But, as I said, and a lot of other people agree, I don't want my government getting involved in the messy details of private lives. So, that leaves me and people like me. If we really want a less governed world, we are going to need to govern ourselves. This means being aware of our influence on others, it also means being willing, available, and aware enough to step up when someone needs us. We have to become at once more self reliant, and more involved in the lives of others, another of those beautiful paradoxes that the kingdom of God seems filled with.

So, what do you think? Are we, or are we not our brother's keeper? Where does responsibility for self end, and reliance on others begin?

In Which I defend "homos" in a Public Debate

2014-11-03T06:55:00.002-08:00

I was in Guthrie for a day. My wife, who sells sex toys for a living, because it helps save marriages and what not, was at a craft and vendors fair at a church there. (wait for it, wait for it, that should be good for at least a comment or two) So, I had planned to spend the day visiting some good friends, at the Hancock Creative Shop and cruising around this great little Victorian town soaking up the vibe.

My friends the Hancocks are real, live artists, living in the wild, and they run this cool shop, which I know will not be open at 8 on a Saturday, so I go to the local Mickey D's to have my annual cup of coffee (I really am not a huge fan) and write for a while. I take some time choosing my seat, not sure why, but I just didn't feel “it” anywhere but up by the front window at a high table.

I write merrily along on this little writer's guide I was working on, which hopefully will be up on Amazon in the next day or so, and I spent probably a half hour in peace, sipping my overly hot black coffee. ( I know, but when I DO drink it, I like it black and bitter)

These two old timers sit down to share breakfast at a table beside mine and the conversation winds through politics and the world series until it gets stuck on the idea that any church that is not openly opposing the “gay agenda” from the pulpit is destined to send their members straight into a fiery afterlife.

I pretty much ignore it, but as the conversation continues one of the two begins to talk louder about “queers” and “gays” and “homos”. He comes to a point where he begins to describe a book to his companion, which has in it, every instance in which a law has been passed in these United States, regarding abortion, gay marriage, the list goes on.... Supposedly the book claims that with every stroke of the pen, God's wrath reigns down, and can be tracked, within 48 hours, a terrible tragedy will strike.

He links everything from the SanFrancisco earthquake to Katrina, to the Moore tornadoes into this web of his. “You can read it fer yerself. Right there, in black and white, them liberals pass a law, and God smites the land.” he ends with this grand proclamation. “Why do they think the Bible says No Homa-sexual, will enter in?” he seems very pleased, his friend quietly nods, and I lose my shit!

I walk over, and sit down. I look the man in the eye. “What else is on that list? You know, the one that says that no homosexual will enter into the kingdom of heaven.” he sits in stunned silence. “Well?”

This is the passage to which the gentleman is referring

On the contrary, you yourselves wrong and defraud. You do this even to your brethren. 9Or do you not know that the unrighteous will not inherit the kingdom of God? Do not be deceived; neither fornicators, nor idolaters, nor adulterers, nor effeminate, nor homosexuals, 10nor thieves, nor the covetous, nor drunkards, nor revilers, nor swindlers, will inherit the kingdom of God.

“You know that anyone who is ever had sex outside of marriage is on that list too? It also mentions the unrighteous, which scripture teaches us we all are, did you know that?” I ask, as politely as I can. “have you ever broken any of the laws of God? Jesus said if you break one, you are guilty of them all.”

“Well, that ain't the same, I repented. They can't just keep on living in their homo lifestyle, just going on screwing the next guy. Don't you know what God did down there in the Old Testament?”

“I know a little, what are you referring to?” I ask. He is warming to his topic.

“When that profit, that guy went to preach to the wicked city, to tell them to repent and then they asked for the men to be sent out so they could have their way with 'em. So, God sent his people to march around it seven times, and it was destroyed because o' homa-sexuals, it's right there in the book!” He smiles, “You must not believe in the Old Testament, are you defending homa-sexuality?”

“Sir, I am not defending anything. I would ask, though, if you intend to speak for the same Jesus I know that you would consider being a bit more loving in your approach. By the way, the profit you refer to, was Jonah, he went to Ninevah, they did repent, the men that asked to have the travelers for sex, were in Sodom, they did not repent, and as for Jericho, that was Joshua who led the people around the city, and homosexuality is not even mentioned in that story. You are confusing three completely separate incidents. That is a sign of ignorance. You, sir, are an ignorant bigot, could you please keep that to yourself?”

He called me names, said I was a gay lover, that I must be queer, that he bet I was a Methodist pastor who conducted gay weddings and then insinuated that I did not know anything about the Bible, probably never even picked it up.

“Well, no matter what I think about homosexuality, I cannot find any place in the Bible that tells me to do anything but love them.” I replied.

To which he laughed, lasciviously, “Oh, I bet you do plenty of that, don't you?” he looks to his friend for support.

“He's right. I don't like the way he came on about it, but he's right.” the friend said, got up and walked away.

“My brother's a homo, I don't need you telling me how to handle it. If he don't repent, he'll get what he deserves in the fires of hell. You're gonna be surprised when you find out who the Lord is!” the man says, as he adjusts his feed cap, spits in his coffee cup, folds his newspaper and storms out.

So, that's how I spent my Saturday morning. How about you?

Why Do I Ask God to Teach Me, Then Complain When Things Change?

2014-11-03T06:17:00.002-08:00

I asked God recently, to help me work on three areas that I felt like he was pointing out were holding me back. I asked to be more courageous, more honest (especially with myself, in a good way instead of bashing myself) and to have more humility. These are dangerous requests. See, God only has one mode of teaching and that is through our experiences. He is not merely going to sit you down and say, here read this great book and then you'll have it.

Instead, he takes life and turns it inside out to give us opportunities to expand in those areas, then waits patiently for us to learn the lesson. Wash, rinse, repeat. So, two weeks ago (about, I did not write down the moment, ironically, I write everything else) I started making this my daily prayer, God teach me to live the truth boldly and with humility.

The first thing that happened was in my work. I am a home repair and remodel carpenter, and freelance writer. Things are pretty cyclical in the self employment business and nothing sucks worse than an election year. Everybody is nervous, they know what they want, and are willing to pay for it, until they suddenly are not, and that has been happening a lot this past Summer. Consequently, we find ourselves a bit behind. This is not because I am self employed, I actually make more that way than through any of the jobs I have been offered, (if you know of one that pays really well, has a flexible schedule and doesn't mind hiring neurotic artists, let me know) but it may have something to do with the eight kids and the monstrous old Victorian house that eats energy. At any rate, the big jobs started drying up. I have had a couple, but I had to fight tooth and claw to get them, and then a few have done the, yes, as soon as possible, but we have to wait for money, thing.

There is no shortage, however, of lesser work, the kind I think of myself as having outgrown about fifteen years back in my twenty-five year carpentry career. Welcome to humility training one o one. So, I take what I can get, and do it to the best of my ability, working as if for the Lord, and not for men, right? Wrong, I get depressed, and barely drag myself out of bed. Instead of seeing His hand, I curse “the enemy” and push the lesson away. But, it keeps coming back, and I am going to have to deal with my pride, either this way, or the hard way when things get really tough.

Next up is courage, and for me, this is not about being timid, or fearful in the traditional sense. I have not written anything on this blog that I would not say in front of a thousand people, and that's saying a lot, because I don't hold back much, except the really personal stuff, like this. So, he begins to challenge me with all of the ideas and projects that I started to do with Him in mind. Things that represent, to my way of thinking, huge personal risk of humiliation when no one pays attention. Yes, I am the guy who rarely gives all, so I can say to myself (if it falls short) well, at least you tried, and if you had given everything, it surely would have been a rousing success!

So, my list of personal improvement projects gets shifted from one place to the next, I'll start this one today, sort of thing. But it's time to set a schedule, quit running things by the seat of my pants. I am getting too old for that. What's sad is I can see that this kind of thing works. I see it all around me! I know that when I wrote an actual business plan for my theater, and committed to it, it happened, without my even needing to organize the effort, it flowed! Time to get it down on paper, it really is like magic what happens when we take our daydreams and commit them to the real world. That, in and of itself, I believe, is the first step of manifestation in a lot of cases.

Last but not least is the truth. I have always given a lot of lip service to loving the truth.

Funny how sometimes you write a sentence, it impacts you, and then nothing else seems to follow it up quite right, so I will just let that one set there on its own for all to see. In my life, the truth really is important and I want to be someone who seeks it out, no matter what it does to my beliefs, or my carefully crafted delusions. I want my beliefs, and the ideas that I live by to contain as much truth as I can find. I really do. I am willing to discard any belief that in my experience proves out to be untrue.

This one is something really hard for me, and that is to truly believe in the skills and talents that God has given me. I did, once upon a time, I really did. I followed them to the ends of the earth, believing that some day, it would all work out, and I would be able to share them with the world, and still eat and have electricity. When that dream died and we had to close our theater, a huge piece of me went with it, and it's time for me to get it back.

The truth is, I am a gifted actor and story teller. I am a highly skilled theatrical director, scene designer and acting coach. I have over a thousand former students, dozens of whom are pursuing professional careers even as I write this. But, when I look at it most days, all I see is the fact that I had to close the doors because not enough people shared that belief with me. That hurts. It turns what others see so obviously, and remind me of, into stinging arrows. I didn't make it that time. Or the time before that.

So, as I write this, I am struggling with God on some dreams he is reawakening. I am dreaming again, but for me, they all hold an element of the nightmare for the moment. I don't know what it is about the artistic temperament, maybe it is how long we live with our work before it is born into the world, but I, for one, take this failure very personally. Even though I know that the art was not the reason it failed. It was a business, and businesses do that from time to time, often outside of our control.

So, right now, I am a big ball of emotion and spiritual awakening and my moments are sometimes painful realizations of what it will mean to become these things. And some days, it almost overshadows the glory of an image I am beginning to see, of who I will be at the end of this. Almost. But I refuse to give up. I have come too far. I have lost too much and suffered some really deep things, but I survived, and I didn't survive to just go on surviving. There has to be more, there will be more, there is going to be much more. Now, if I can just stay out of the way, and keep my mind in the right place long enough for Him to finish this next phase of me!

Do You Really Believe What You Believe? Why?

2014-10-24T06:00:00.000-07:00

As I have been writing posts the last few days, a thought keeps poking up through the rant in my head, about why people believe things, and I think this is something that most people probably don't consider a whole lot. Of course, I am so sheltered, having grown up in a totally conservative environment, where everyone's beliefs are handed down from generation to generation, with no need to question them until recently, because, the majority of people, while not necessarily subscribing to them, agreed that they were probably true, at least on some level.

This makes me one of the worst judges of what normal people do, or talk, or think about. But, in my experience, a lot of people that I have known, seem to give more thought to their choice of a favorite major league sports franchise, than they do to their philosophy on life. That, or they spend about six months during college, when they are taking philosophy, or comparative religion, or psychology to gel their belief system, and then they never revisit it, you know, set it and forget it, like the showtime rotisserie.

So, I thought about it and I came to a few conclusions, which are probably completely wrong, but I am sure you kind people will be good enough to correct my misconceptions. So, here they are.

WHY?

There are a few major reasons that people believe the things they believe, most of them are, in one way or another, inherited. Here they are in no particular order.

Because my parents told me so
Because I learned it in school
Because that is what everyone else I know believes
The Bible says so
And last but not least, there are a few individuals who think it through, listen to input, read, study and come to well reasoned conclusions.

So, there they are. Now, let's take them apart and look at them a little.

BECAUSE MY PARENTS SAID SO

For most of us, this one tends to wear off a bit by the time we are fourteen. However, it comes back around as the default when we reach adulthood, unless we find other beliefs to take up space in our heads, but for the record, this is probably the single worst reason to believe anything!

My dad, the preacher, used to use this sermon illustration: A woman is preparing her first big Holiday meal in her own home,and her mother sits at the kitchen table, helping with odd things here and there. The woman pulls a large roast out of the refrigerator, where it has been marinating, and promptly cuts off both ends of it, putting the smaller, center section of the roast into a broiler pan with the herbs and spices, and pops it in the oven.

Her mother looks at her questioningly and the daughter asks why, the mother asks why she has cut the roast that way, and the daughter says, because you taught me to. The mother laughs. Turns out the mother had been cutting the roast off at both ends because the pan she had when the daughter lived at home, was too small for a larger roast. In turn, this pan was the one inherited from her mother, who also cut the roast ends to accommodate the smaller pan.

It is a fact that our parents do have deeply held beliefs, and that we tend to pick up on them. Some are overtly shared, and expected to be carried on. Some are unintentionally passed along through habits and traditions. In some cases, we may not even know the difference, like the woman cutting the roast, there are probably things in most lives that we do thinking they are important, or sacred on some level, when all the while it is just what has always been done. This roast cutting ritual could have been passed down to another generation, and so on, if the mother had never asked.

These beliefs may be useful, and some of them may prove to be true, but accepting beliefs, especially beliefs that dictate your relationships, religious observances, or political affiliations, without really knowing if you really believe in them or not, seems like a recipe for an unfulfilled life.

So, how do you explore these family heirlooms without being disrespectful? First, there is absolutely no reason to say anything to anyone who will be offended, until you have truly decided. You are an adult, and you can choose your own beliefs. Where your parents are right, follow them and teach your children to do the same, where they are wrong, drop it like its hot. When it doesn't matter, just think it through, if the belief adds to your life, keep it, if not, do what you want, if it detracts, throw it out.

MY TEACHER TOLD ME SO!

Teachers are great, and if you listen to the news, they are the unsung heroes of our era, but keep looking and you will also see that some of them are not and should never be left alone with minors. In general, the truth lies somewhere in the middle, and most teachers are hard working, well meaning people who took their jobs to help young people get a head start on life.

Teachers are fairly well educated, and as such are looked to as dispensers of accurate information. However, many of them also start straight into their teaching profession, with little work, or other adult experience, outside academia. Sometimes this creates a very narrow window of information and they share mostly what was taught to them and from approved sources that other teachers use as well.

In general, this is not a problem when it comes to basic facts, but almost all of what we consider to be beliefs are not factual information, but opinion based ideals that we use as a framework for making life decisions. A person with limited outside experience, who works inside a government structure, with others who have a similarly limited experience, may not be the best ones to get your world view from.

Everyone has biases, the trick is to expose yourself to enough different points of view to minimize the impact your biases have on your general belief system. So, same as with the parents, when it comes to beliefs you learned in school, expose them to the light of day, if they still stand up, keep them, if not, meh...

EVERYONE KNOWS THAT!

Everyone, as it turns out, is a highly unreliable source of information. After all, everyone, passed around a story that had youngsters and women sneaking peaks into their back seats in fear of a gangster wannabe with a hatchet, ready to take their hand back to their leaders in some form of gang initiation. Turns out, this never happened, or was never recorded at least, not one single time! But everyone was convinced that it was true.

Recently everyone has been up in arms about a lot of things that are going to destroy the American dream, take your pick

Illegal aliens
Ebola
Obama
The NSA
ISIS

The names change from time to time, but there is nothing new in that. Before we were so afraid of Islamic terrorists, it was Russians. When the iron curtain finally came down, what did we find out? Were they our equal, but opposite nemesis? NO, they were a broke, disorganized mess that could not even keep track of their own nuclear arsenal. Everyone knew they were going to get us, to the point that school children were subjected to ridiculously pointless drills, in the firm belief that their eventual attack could be survived by ducking and covering under a school desk. But it never happened.

It is my opinion, that none of these things will be our ultimate undoing, we will destroy ourselves, running from one fear to the next, with everyone cheering us on to our demise.

There are some simple way to combat everyone's beliefs. First, do a little fact checking before you decide to believe what they say. Find out for yourself, especially if your health, safety, finances, or family are at risk if they are wrong. In this day and age, information on almost anything is available at your fingertips. When everyone was saying that thousands were being beheaded by ISIS a simple search would reveal that the source was one single interview which got repeated so many times that it became fact over night, although credible evidence was nowhere to be found, and even many conservative watchdog sites caught on and debunked some of the photos claiming to show this atrocity.

Think about it, if there were thousands of christians being beheaded, wouldn't you be able to find pictures? I mean, Rene Zellweger gets a little eyelid tuck and there are literally hundreds of stories chock full of comparison photos,and you seriously think that the same govt that used this story as a justification to bomb another middle eastern country straight to hell scrubbed the internet of photos related to it? Turns out, there were never even tens of thousands of this people group to begin with.

Same practice applies, if it isn't true, or doesn't make sense, why bother with it? In most cases, a simple, am I minding my own business? Test will make it unnecessary for you to have an opinion at all. It goes like this: Does this have a direct bearing on my life? No, scrap it. Yes, continue. Is there anything I can do to change it? No, stop worrying so much, Yes, do it! If it really does not effect you in any way, stop talking about it, it's gossip, it's none of your business and you are becoming a part of the problem.

THE BIBLE TELLS ME SO!

This one is tricky for me, because I happen to believe in the Bible as a source of truth. But, I have heard more outrageous beliefs justified by supposed Biblical support, or mandate, than just about anything else. So, let's get started, shall we?

The first stop on this little jaunt is, does it really? Does it really say whatever is being claimed? In many cases, the answer will be yes, and you may have to do a little digging to get to the truth. In addition to a literal interpretation of a single verse,or small passage, an understanding of context will often clear up many misunderstandings. For instance, there are some verses, if quoted on their own, or only in part, seem to say one thing. For example the Bible says “We keep on sinning so that God can show us more and more of his wonderful grace” but in reality that verse says: “Well then, should we keep on sinning so that God can show us more and more of his wonderful grace?” And the following verse adds to this understanding by adding: “Of course not! Since we have died to sin, how can we continue to live in it?”

This is, of course, not something that I have ever heard anyone claim, or teach, but you get the idea. So, ask, where is that verse, then go and read the passage, the chapter, or two chapters surrounding it. Find out , who is talking? Who are they talking to? Why are they saying what they are saying? Does it really seem to mean what you heard it meant? Does that line up with the rest of scripture, and what you know about the Bible and christianity? If not, keep looking until you find the answer!

There are other more subtle nuances to this as well, for instance, do you know the difference between a translation and a version? Is the version being quoted generally seen as reliable to the original text? Are the passages still relevant today? Not everything that is in scripture is generally considered applicable to modern believers. Is the language in the passage, other than what was quoted figurative, or literal?

Asking all of these questions will get you through many crises of Biblical understanding, and just knowing these tips will put you way ahead of many people who even teach the Bible themselves!

Before I leave this topic, I want to hit on the doctrine of Biblical inerrancy. Basically, the tenets of most evangelical, mainstream protestant denominations state that the Bible is perfect. That it was protected by God so that it would be perfectly translated, that the documents that are a part of it are perfect, and inspired directly by God and that it is the complete revealed message of God.

This is something I used to ascribe to, vehemently. Then one day I realized, it does not matter. No, I don't mean it isn't important whether it is true, or accurate. What I mean is this, we cannot claim to perfectly understand all parts of scripture. If you think you do, there will be an equal number of equally educated experts lined up on the other side to argue against your interpretation, so, ergo, whether it is perfect or not, does not matter. This does not mean we should not strive to understand it better and better as we live our lives.

Here is one question to ask yourself regarding the inerrancy of scripture, why does it matter to you? I know for myself it was a matter of self justification. In other words, if I have this perfect book, and I use it as a filter to judge everything in life, then I can know that what I believe is true, all of the time. Another part of why it mattered was this, I could also “rightly judge” the actions of others to know who was and was not in the club!

I will argue the other side for one moment. This document, however flawed, is the only tangible thing we Christians have to base our faith on. It is the only single point of conversion we can all point to and work from in understanding how we should interact with each other, and it is the most complete record of the life of Christ and His teachings.

So, is “because the Bible tells me so” a good reason to believe something? In many cases, the answer may be yes. But not everything that it says is as it appears, especially out of context, and not everything someone claims it says is true. Want to be one of the best educated Christians in the world? Read it, from front to back, you will be more informed than almost every other believer. Very few ever do that.

THINK FOR YOURSELF!

Above all else, you have been given a mind, and a conscience. If you are a Christian, Jesus said the spirit of God would reside within you. You have all of the mental, spiritual and physical capacities to make good decisions, form good beliefs and judge what you want to add, and what you want to discard. Ultimately, you will be accountable for your own life, take this from Paul, the Apostle

If one of the unbelievers invites you and you want to go, eat anything that is set before you without asking questions for conscience' sake. But if anyone says to you, "This is meat sacrificed to idols," do not eat it, for the sake of the one who informed you, and for conscience' sake; I mean not your own conscience, but the other man's; for why is my freedom judged by another's conscience?…

I love this last bit, why is my freedom judged by another's conscience. No, it should not be. You and you alone will give an account for the life you lead. Please, think about your beliefs, get rid of those that don't fit. Accept new and better ones when you find them and live by all of your beliefs in such a way that you love all men, at all times, in all places.

What I Believe About Sex, Drugs and Pornography, What Do You Believe?

2014-10-23T06:00:00.000-07:00

When I finished my rant the other day, I realized there were a few categories I had left out entirely, so, not wanting to offend only a small part of my audience, I decided to write a follow up. I cannot tell you how much better it feels to not be holding back anymore. It is exhilarating to finally be free to say whatever I really think. Now, as a writer, do not get me wrong, there are filters in place, and I have no desire to share any intimate details of my romantic life, or anything like that, but just to stop avoiding things because of people's opinions. It feels great!

So, in no particular order, here are a few more things I think most people should think about again, since their opinions seem to be half baked, and indefensible. Here we go.

SEX

Might as well start with God's greatest invention. That's right, sex was God's idea and not the Devil's, and being the father of eight, married to my high school sweetheart, I have a lot of things to say on the subject. First, I believe that God's best is for loving adults to be in a lifelong committed monogamous relationship. Part of the reason for that is that sex, like fire, is awesome, but can be potentially harmful in a lot of ways.

That being said, premarital sex is hardly the worst thing you could ever do. I mean, murder, rape, and a few others would definitely top the list. If my kids are reading this, it is the second worst, next to murder, which is what your mother is going to do when she finds out. So, keep your clothes on!

So, why is it Christians get so freaked out whenever sex gets mentioned, after all, there is an entire book of the Bible devoted to how, when and why you should be doing it! Solomon had some pretty kinky euphemisms as well, but I digress.

Here is the truth, married people, statistically speaking, have more sex than non married people, and report enjoying it more! It's true, we are also more adventurous, having more varied sex than our single counterparts! That's right! http://www.huffingtonpost.com/2012/04/13/marriage-sex_n_1422644.html

So, what about the young among us? Should we teach them abstinence only? In a perfect world, I believe that everyone would wait for the right person. This is not that world. While it sucks that people other than their parents are frequently the ones to share the details of reproduction with kids, there is one way to handle that. Inform your kids early! Give them as much clinical detail as they can sit still for, as soon as they ask! Do not hide it from them! (not suggesting putting the video of your wild weekend on the big screen) there is a HUGE difference between "private" and "secret".

When we hide things from our kids, we have no one to blame but ourselves for their mishandling of the subject. Once they are old enough to engage in sexual activity, they should know, the good and the bad. Educate your children about stds and birth control as well. While I agree, I don't want my kids giving up before marriage, I don't want grand kids until they have a family to be part of.

So, I think you should talk to them about the beauty of it, admit that it's the most fun you can possibly have inside a human body, and tell them about the dangers of it too. Don't worry that exposure will encourage them to experiment. If you tell it to them in context and share your hope that they will wait for a mate, most kids will want to meet that expectation. Under NO circumstances do I EVER agree with parents shaming, or threatening children regarding sex. True, that while they are minors, they are your responsibility and their actions can effect you, so let them know that. This is not a thing where all of the repercussions always stay between to the two people involved. (watch Jane the Virgin for a hilarious take on how that works)

Your job is to love people, not judge them, including your kids. If you restrict them unnecessarily in this regard, you will regret it. They are going to make their own choices, so grow up and realize that you cannot program, and even if you could, you have made plenty of mistakes, and would not be a good cloning model for the human race any more than anyone else!

Yes, encourage your kids, provide them with a good example, but recognize that they ARE already autonomous, you don't get to grant that to them, they have ALWAYS had the power to make their own choices, just because you managed to make them believe this was not true, it was. They are born with the ability to rebel. It is choice that makes obedience powerful, not coercion.

If your child hurts someone with sexual behavior, as in the case of rape, or child abuse, you must allow the courts to do their job. Do not ever consider covering up for someone you love, as their next target may already be picked out.

DRUGS

I myself, am not a fan. I drink, a very little, something I started at the grand old age of 38, and I have never had more than five beers in a twenty-four hour period, and that was on an adult's only vaca week to Vegas where I had no responsibilities for my kids, or the need to drive. I don't like the way I feel when I take cold medicine, or benadryl and would not be lined up to take advantage of recreational marijuana were it ever made legal here. ( I live in Oklahoma which had prohibition until 1959) I don't like feeling out of control, don't like the burn of alcohol, the feeling of light headedness, or the realization that I am talking way too loud.

So, there you have it, I don't like it they should continue to ban it and jail those who publicly disagree. It will make the world a better place, right? Not exactly. I am a libertarian, and I really need to change my voter registration, so the poor RNC can stop calling me! I believe that drugs should be legal. I think that we have laws protecting people from rape, murder, pedophilia, reckless driving, destruction of private property, larceny, burglary, breaking and entering, trespassing, lude behavior, assault, battery, bank robbery, armed robbery, stalking, harassment, and public indecency. So many laws that protect people from the behaviors most commonly associated with the use of illegal substances, so WHY do we need to criminalize the act of ingesting the substance?

If you want the real answer, follow the money. Start with private prisons being a multi-billion dollar industry, with guaranteed occupancy of 80-90% in many cases. (yep, it's true bit.ly/thesharpenedspoondotcom )

Then look into how much money police and other govt agencies get from seizures of private property http://www.drugwarfacts.org/cms/Forfeiture

Then move on to the fact that this is a primary motivator for the militarization of police forces, and other government expansions, and one could make a very good case that the war on drugs has been good, mainly for one person, Uncle Sam.

I am for decriminalization of most drugs. As I said, there are already laws against all of the seediness and public danger they create. (if they do in fact create danger, we have not had a free society for so long, our perspective on this issue may be a bit skewed) It would empty out our prisons, stop man dangerous no-knock raids that are killing innocents and put a black market out of existence. Tax it, I suppose, although I think all govts on all levels waste more than enough now, and do not deserve any more.

PORN

This one is going to be a bit tricky. But I think there are some things that need to be said. Let me start by saying, that the sex trade is a complete abomination, and in every case where people are subjected to ANY sexual behavior, or performance, through coercion, or threat of violence, or monetary blackmail, or whatever. If a person is not engaging willingly, knowing and believing that they have a choice, the ones "forcing" this behavior should be sent away for a very long time.

I do not believe that there is anything AT ALL dirty, inherently sexual, or obscene about human nudity. Period. It is not the images in these materials that make it what it is, it is our depraved thinking. In the beginning, God created us to commune with him and each other in a perfectly innocent and completely unclothed state. We have the puritans to thank for much of what we believe about human sexuality, and they believed that even during married sex God left the building. Literally, if you died during intercourse, you were eternally "screwed".

I also do not believe that all depictions of the naked human form are pornographic by nature. I have appreciated the beauty in paintings, sculpture and photography without lusting, many times. But just as a glossy car spread can cause the seeds of envy, jealousy and covetousness to grow, so too, these images can be misused. Pornography, to me, is that form that depicts graphically, sexual activity and the human body posed and exposed in ways that are designed to elicit feelings of erotic desire. Not all things erotic are pornographic, either though. This is all my opinion, let's move on.

The purchase of pornographic materials, at least on some level, must be seen as a support to these types of activities, and for that reason, is really not a good thing. That being said, I personally do not agree with much of the teaching that has been prevalent on this subject in the past few decades, on several levels.

First, I do agree that lust is a sin, just as gossip, lying and cheating on your taxes are also sins. It bears the same penalty, Biblically speaking, as do all sins. Pornography leads to lust. It can damage relationships, create unrealistic expectations, and encourages extramarital behaviors.

Now, for the part where I disagree. I do not believe that a single usage of pornography is tantamount to adultery, and I do not agree that it should be grounds for divorce. I think in many, many, cases, some that I am personally aware of, that the use of standard pornographic materials on a casual, or regular, but not compulsive and disruptive level has been seen by many as the same as having an affair. I understand the pain the spouse must feel, betrayal, and the rest. I do. However, in many cases, the party engaged (typically men) has never even contemplated actually approaching another living breathing human being to engage in even a conversation about sex, let alone engaged in the activity.

Yes, I realize that Jesus said that if you look on a woman to lust after her you have committed adultery with her, already in your heart. I did not say it was a good thing. It does occur to me, however, that to hold someone to so high a standard in this one regard, while the wife is watching Real Housewives, engaging in all types of slanderous gossip, overeating and otherwise living in destructive ways, puts way too much emphasis on this subject.

This does not excuse men from their duty to lead a pure life. When you see that over 90% of respondents to almost any poll on the topic admit to having used some type of pornography, it would stand to reason that this is a fairly normal thing. Again, not right, but human, and in most cases forgivable.

I, know what I have said so far will be seen by many as excusing horrific behavior, I hope you hear me when I say, it is not my intent. In a perfect world, all men would marry a woman they truly cherished and thought of as the most beautiful in the world. I have made it my habit to adjust my thinking so that my wife has truly become the object of my desires, and the woman that I measure physical beauty by, but not everyone is going to do that. It does not mean that he is not a good husband, a fantastic provider and faithful to his family.

There are some expectations that the modern world, church in particular, has put on marriage and romance that have little to do with the Biblical picture. Our modern day ideals about romantic love and choices and feelings would be as foreign to someone from the first century as air travel. It is not that they did not experience these things, but they seem to have been more of a bonus than the expected, daily norm.

Beyond the "normal", consensual adult behaviors depicted in pornography, there are other categories, which present the abuse of humans, the inclusion of children and animals. This is not at all what I am talking about, and anyone who habitually seeks out these things should seriously get some counseling, as you present a danger to people around you. This is never okay. Again, it is sin, just like any other, and forgivable, but it should be dealt with before rape, murder, incest, bestiality and other things become a part of it in more than just the fantasies of that individual.

In addition while I think it optimal that all men eliminate pornography from their lives, for those of you who are financially burdening your families, or find your compulsion is interfering with your duties as a provider, husband or father, due to the time, energy and money you are devoting to this habit, stop hiding and find someone to help you. Shame and condemnation should not be a part of this, it is not useful, but regret and repentance are both Godly.

MEDIA

On to something a bit lighter. I believe that all human expression is useful. Some of it shows us what we should be, some of it shows us what to avoid. Art and creative endeavors are a tricky subject to navigate. When it comes to movies, books, music and digital media, I am a pretty open person about what I watch. I watch the things I enjoy. If I find that something disturbs me, or makes it hard for me to be the person I know God is calling me to be, I don't watch it anymore.

There is a concept that I have lived by most of my life. I refuse to use some list of behaviors to avoid and things I cannot do. (well except for murder, adultery, etc, LOL)

Paul said it like this in Corinthians:

If one of the unbelievers invites you and you want to go, eat anything that is set before you without asking questions for conscience' sake. But if anyone says to you, "This is meat sacrificed to idols," do not eat it, for the sake of the one who informed you, and for conscience' sake; I mean not your own conscience, but the other man's; for why is my freedom judged by another's conscience?…

Why indeed? SO, I watch what I want, I read what I want, and I discuss it, like an adult. If I find that I have violated my conscience, I repent and a I do not go back to it. But, I don't need some general consensus of the believers around me, to buy a movie ticket. This is something that many modern believers will all but ignore. Our consciences have all but died from atrophy. You need to exercise it to keep it sharp, or when you need it,and you can't call for backup, it will not be there to protect you.
John tells us we don't need a teacher, Jesus promised to give the Holy Spirit to guide us, God promised OT to write his law on our hearts, and yet, we still think that human consensus is the best way to make individual moral decisions, go figure.

I know there is more, but I think I've said enough for one day. Thanks for reading, I hope it encourages you to think about what you believe.

Toxic Person in Recovery Right Here. This one Will Make You Feel Good About Yourself!

2014-10-22T06:00:00.000-07:00

I figure my main job as a parent, is to ensure that my kids do not grow up to be assholes.

I have had this sentence rattling around in my head for years, and this is the very first time I have ever put it down on paper, without editing that last word with asterisks. Good grief. Here I am a man of forty-three years old, with eight kids, and a wife of 22 years, and I just now have the courage to put swearing into print. Sheesh.

For some of you, that last part lost you, you don't find it courageous, you find it reprehensible,and yet, I am dead certain sure, that if you have kids, you appreciate the sentiment. For me, it is especially challenging, since I have allowed myself to become one and am now in recovery, assaholics anonymous, as I heard it put on a sitcom the other night.

Believe me when I say that anyone who had been through the stupid crap I have been through, been kicked between the uprights emotionally speaking, as many times as I have would probably feel justified in just drifting off into crotchetiness, but I happen to think there are still things for me to accomplish in this life that are being hindered by my attitude.

It really all came crashing in on me the other night while perusing my junk mail, which is pretty much all the email I get. There was one article there about how successful people deal with toxic people,and, for whatever reason, I was drawn to this piece of flotsam in my inbox. So, I read it. Do you know what I realized? I have never given a damn about how to deal with toxic people and have pretty much written off every bit of advice that I have ever seen in that vein for one simple reason, which I did not realize until the moment I read that title, I am a toxic person.

If you have ever had a similar realization about yourself, you will understand, why after forty-three years of life, this came as a surprise to me. The rest of you will probably not get it, but I am going to write about it anyway, because this is what I need to do right now,and if you don't think this applies to you there are about a half billion blogs out there all written for similarly perfect people go read one of them. Anyway, as I was saying, it hit me right between the uprights, with a sinking certainty, that I never needed to know how to deal, cope, work around these difficult people, because I understood them as only a native could, I was their king.

It had always escaped me, the reason that I was frequently socially swept aside, not so much rejected, as marginalized. Included, but not in every way. Part of it was my reticence to be a joiner, I have never been a true blue fan of anything much, but part of it was that I have been making people uncomfortable for a very long time, and it needs to stop. That was my realization and it took me completely off guard. My wife, if she were reading this would be shaking her head by now, because she has been telling me this for over a decade, but of course, I can't see through her eyes. I am one of those people who need to learn everything for myself.

One of the weirdest parts of this realization was this: not only was I being a jerk, but a big part of the reason, and this is going to sound weird, was because I was trying to be nice. Truly. Let me see if I can explain this. For one thing, I am a know-it-all. Really, I am. I remember the oddest things and rarely forget, plus my work history has led me into so many different fields, and I read nearly anything I can get my hands on, so I genuinely know a little about a lot of things, and feel pretty comfortable sharing it.. especially when someone seems to be having trouble with something I think I know. For another, while I am a fairly forthright individual, I am also very sensitive, and so, I frequently avoid saying things that I think are incendiary. But, the problem is, those things also, frequently happen to be true, and repressing them does not make it better, but it sure makes for some beautiful fireworks when the repressed stuff I should have dealt with comes out later at some awkward, inopportune moment.

In addition to all of this, I am in love with being right. So much so that I will frequently find some way in which I am right even in the most obvious of “you're wrong and you know it” kind of moments. It comes off as pure arrogance, even when the intention is to save face myself, it feels, to the other person, that I am trying to make them look bad, forcing them to accept the thing I am trying to avoid myself.

Then, there's the fact that I never, ever, not one time in my whole life, have ever backed down from an argument. So, wrap that package up and what do you have? TADA toxic person in a box! Throw in a smidge of impulse control and a whole lotta smart ass, with a bit of a temper (not given to physical, but verbal violence) and you have a lot of fun at parties, am I right?

So, all of this comes rolling at me through one little email, and amazingly, the take away for me, was this: I need to be more honest with people about how I feel. Although I have always thought myself to be overbearing, I need to have the courage to speak up when something truly bothers me, instead of waiting until it pisses me off. I need to stop cramming myself into uncomfortable situations, to try and help. I need to learn to mind my own damn business. I need to detox occasionally, in private, to reduce the risk of infecting others.

So, what does this have to do with my first sentence? Apparently nothing, but, my challenge to myself right now is to write what's real, and this realization is real for me right now. I don't really know much about parenting anyway. Everything I do know was self taught, trial and error and somehow my kids are turning out okay, despite me, which I hope gives everyone who reads this hope!

You may be thinking, sheesh this guy is a mess, makes me feel better about myself, and I can honestly say, congratulations! Glad you don't have my issues to deal with, but I bet you have your own, we'll get to those later. For now, I am feeling just a little bit better, learning how to live in truth, courage and humility. Maybe I'll get back to that not raising assholes thing in another post.

This is What I Believe and If You Don't Agree, Then Great!

2014-10-21T11:04:00.001-07:00

I am done worrying about what will happen if I just come out and say what I think about stuff. It's meaningless bullshit to not be able to just put the words on the page because you are so bound up in what somebody will feel about what you wrote. So, here is the deal, for years, I worried about what God thought, then He and I made peace with me being completely bass ackwards wrong some times, okay, most of the time, but that didn't stop me from locking myself down, see, there was still this part of me, this sick little, grew up in an environment that was conservative but not nearly as oppressive as I probably thought, little kid, who wanted people to feel all nice and cuddly and want to kiss puppies when they were done reading whatever it was, so, I would look for those kinds of things to share, and even once that stopped being the case, I just didn't really feel that I was free to share whatever I wanted to. I would lock down my vocabulary, or pull a punch to save face, or share things tied to some specific verse, or idea, or try to figure out what the hell people wanted to read anyway, or write to try and change someone's mind, or get them to agree, and you know what? I am just done to death with that, so here I am and I am going to say a lot of crap today, so hang on have fun, leave a comment, start an argument, go crazy, I don't care anymore, because this is what I have needed to do for a long time. So here goes!

Politics!

Most of you have never even really thought about what you want the world to be, what you wish it was if it could be just the way it should be, which I think is where it starts in having any kind of opinion about it. Furthermore, just about everyone I know is parroting someone else, as if they didn't have a single thought in their own head that was worth bringing to the front of their faces and pushing out with their lips the teeth and the tip of the tongue. (actors, you may get that, the rest, won't but I do!)

Both parties are hell bent on destroying what is left of America's liberty because they both believe that somehow freedom can come from giving the right person control. LOOK IT UP! Freedom is what happens when no one has control! Liberty is the state in which a person is free to do the right thing, or not, of course there should be consequences for things such as murder, rape, thievery, destruction of property, personal injury, fraud and the list goes on, but damn it, the more you restrict others, the bigger that monster government grows, and it just looking for one thing, POWER, and where does it go to find it? YOUR LIBERTY! So wise the heck up and start thinking it through. The limits you put on others are creating new governmental powers, which will be used wholesale to restrict anything that gets in their way!

Gay Marriage!

Yep, I said it, and I do not mean, just “marriage” why? Because this is a fairly new concept to most of us. Here is what I think: don't care. That is right, I do not care. Because I do not think that government is a good source for choices on the issue of right and wrong. Ever. Ever, under any circumstance, nope, not then either! When you legislate morality, you give them the power to arbitrate the truth. This, in most people's minds, will change perception of what is true, based on what is legal, or not legal.

For myself, I have always believed that the truth is homosexuality is a sin, but in recent years, I have come to believe that it is not my job to eradicate anybody's sin but my own! So, do I still believe it's wrong? I don't know, and I am actually okay with that. Does the Bible speak against it? Yep, sure seems to, in its current state, in a couple of passages, along with some other things like “lying”, but we don't kick them out of the church or try to subjugate them into changing their minds, unless their lies effect us, so, here is what I am saying, love people, and mind your own business. Now, if your gay neighbor wants to parade his sex life in front of your kids, that is a different issue, but public decency and private adult choices that don't concern you are two separate issues.

I know there are people who will take issue with this, but here is what I say to that, bring it on! I am not stating that my opinion is the end all be all, what I am saying is that my former attitude towards homosexuality was keeping me from loving people the way Christ taught me to, so I choose to shift my focus. If anyone was considering this, and felt that they had a choice, I would advise them against it, because I think it is a very hard life to live, mostly, sad to say, due to judgmental people who mostly don't even think about their belief, or their opinion, but accept it wholesale, stamped, sealed and approved from a pulpit every Sunday, I'll get to that next!

Church!

As to the modern day, mainline, interdenominational, non-denominational, presbaptimethocatholinessofchrist? Shut the doors! That's right. Jesus said that every tree that does not bear good fruit should be cut down and thrown into the fire. If your church's primary reason to exist is to eradicate sin, you missed it, if it's there to be a social club for positive living, great! Call it that, and shuck the tax free status, if it's all about politics and winning things for Jesus in a way that he never endorsed, shut the doors! There are two groups of people that I think should never have lifetime careers, one is pastors and one is politicians, for the same reason!

God moves, he doesn't stand still. He focuses on something until he deems the time has come to move on to the next thing, and he does it. Listening to the same people spout the same ideas every week for ten, twenty, thirty, or even fifty years, does not generally lend itself to staying in tune with that! Want some examples? Look at who God raised up to be leaders in Israel, did any of them go about it in the same way? No. They had differing styles, differing focuses, differing methods, and we seem to think that if we can just pigeon hole the right way to be righteous, and narrow it down, and refine it, we can really make God happy! Look around you at the world we live in, his first commandment to men, before the church even opened its doors, included taking care of the planet and being responsible for the people on it, and the earth itself! So, pat yourself on the back for your weekend retreat, and all the introspection you can muster, but we have a lot of work to do and it needs to start today, and as long as we all sit behind the various facades we think of as churches, it is never going to happen!

YOU!

You are made in the image of almighty God! You are the crowning achievement of His creation, the one that he chose to personally commune with. You are awesome! Stop it! Stop accepting this nonsense that you are so full of evil that nothing that comes out of you is right! Those verses, if you look at the context, are all aimed at times when wicked men were overrunning the righteous! That is not about you! You love your family, you love your coworkers, you try hard to be decent to people around you, but you got some explaining to do also.

See, while some things are fringe items on the Biblical agenda, like homosexuality, for example, some things are very clear and get mentioned again, and again, and again! So, here we go!

MONEY!

For the love of money is a root of all sorts of evil, and some by longing for it have wandered away from the faith and pierced themselves with many griefs.

READ IT AGAIN! This verse is one of the most ignored verses of the last thirty years of mainstream church history! You are not to love money. Jesus had a lot to say about it. Most of it bad. I know, Dave Ramsey is reallllly popular, but guess what? He has made a huge fortune telling you what you wanted to hear, which is that you can pursue God and Money! However, that is not what scripture teaches at all! Jesus said this "The eye is the lamp of the body; so then if your eye is clear, your whole body will be full of light. "But if your eye is bad, your whole body will be full of darkness. If then the light that is in you is darkness, how great is the darkness! "No one can serve two masters; for either he will hate the one and love the other, or he will be devoted to one and despise the other. You cannot serve God and wealth.

Do I think this means that you cannot have money and serve God? No, but this is the eye of the needle Jesus was referring to when he talked about how difficult it would be for someone already having wealth to enter the kingdom! He refers in that passage to the light in you being darkness. In other places we are told that Satan masquerades as an angel of light. Perhaps this refers to a false belief about money? I don't have enough energy to flesh this out right now, but here is my challenge, THINK!

Think about your attitude towards money. Why do you spend the bulk of your day trying to get more of it, many of you doing things you would never do if it were not for the money? Why do feel the way you do about spending it, giving it, saving it? Look for yourself. Study it for yourself, don't take the word of some pastor or teacher with a vested interest. If nothing else, just read the words of Jesus and see what you come away with if you don't add anybody else's interpretation into the mix.

Briefly, I think he said this, wealth, or abundance, which is a much better word, comes when we seek the kingdom first, but surprisingly, the more you do, the less it matters to you how much you have, or what anybody else does with theirs. If you have to struggle to hear God when it comes to giving, I suggest you have an issue in this regard. I suggest that if you are easily, readily, and regularly engaging in judging others for their abundance, or lack, or using it for a measure of any kind, you might have an issue.

PASTORS AND OTHER “PROFESSIONAL” CHRISTIANS

I already said a few things, but here is what we know: the word pastor is mentioned one time in the NT. Yet, we virtually center our entire religious observance around the opinions, ideas and thoughts of a single man in each congregation of believers. Meanwhile, there may be hundreds, thousands, or even tens of thousands following him. How many of them have to fall before we understand this? They are men, there is only one mediator between God and man, the man Jesus Christ.

So many in our day are making bank on the superstitions and half beliefs of entire groups of people that it makes me sick to think about it. The Christian bookstores are filled to overflowing with the crap they spew about every topic under the sun, ninety-nine point nine percent of which can only be called Biblical under the loosest, most lacking in context understandings possible. We were told that we did not need a teacher

As for you, the anointing you received from him remains in you, and you do not need anyone to teach you. But as his anointing teaches you about all things and as that anointing is real, not counterfeit--just as it has taught you, remain in him.

This is believed to be from the Apostle John, the same John whose gospel we find at the front of our NT. He was expressing something here, that if you know the spirit inside, that deposit that is said to be there to tell of things to come, you cannot be led astray. So, believers, we should be more reliant on what the spirit inside tells us, and not so quick to jump on something because someone can outline a “scriptural” case for it, remember, he is likely trying to sell a book, which he hopes will become a lesson series, which will them spring into a video series, a series of lectures, and if he's really lucky, an entire series of conferences, with tens of thousands repeating his ideas, and paying lots and lots of money to do so.

So, do I think there are still trustworthy men in professional ministry, yes, absolutely, but even they should be held accountable, and their teachings questioned in light of what you read, and what you hear from that inner still small voice!

JESUS!

Last, but certainly not least, I want to share what I personally believe about Jesus of Nazareth. Much of this is still because of my upbringing, but nothing in my experience has contradicted it, so this is still my belief.

I believe that Jesus was born of a virgin, lived a pure and sinless life (not a life without mistakes, by the way, he learned to be a carpenter, after all) Taught a new kingdom not built with hands, which he left to his disciples to carry on. He subjected himself to the Romans who crucified Him, through the will of the Jewish high court, died, was buried and was raised again. I believe he has ascended to the Father, and will return bodily once again at the end of the age to establish his Kingdom with those who believe.

I also believe that He is one of the most misquoted, misunderstood, and misinterpreted teachers and prophets in the history of the world. I think that reading His word, unfiltered, uninterpreted, without commentary, will change your life. It will disturb your beliefs, especially your “christian” beliefs in some cases, and make you long for the world he describes when he says, the Kingdom of God is like.....

HELL AND HEAVEN

I don't know. Really, I just don't know anymore how I feel about all of this, and before you start throwing stones at me, please, think! Why are you so invested in the idea of eternal, for always, forever and ever torment and punishment of another human being? What is it that makes some people almost downright giddy at the aspect that some, not them of course, but some, and in many cases MOST of the humans throughout all of history will be deposited into a great lake of fire?

Yes, the Bible does mention it, but there is precious little in the way of a treatise on this. The passages that mention are few,and far between in comparison to some things, like LOVE for example. Also, the concepts, between OT and NT are not cohesive. The belief that most mainstream Christians ascent to is a third concept that does not really fit with either of these, and that is just in the reading.

As for heaven? The concept I was taught as a child does not seem nearly big enough for an afterlife upgrade designed by the creator of all of this magnificent stuff we see before us on the earthly plane.

I do believe in the afterlife and that rewards and consequences will be awarded. But, I am not at all sure that they are as absolute, or as permanent, in our way of thinking, as they have been described. Look around you, the creation we currently inhabit is constantly in flux. It is always revealing new things, can you really believe in a static world beyond this that NEVER CHANGES, in the way we hear those words?

At any rate, it does nothing to dampen my appetite for sharing Jesus and His Teachings, I am not a universalist, because any God who saves people who don't want saving makes no sense to me either. So, I am open to discussing and learning more about this, and ultimately, it changes nothing. It changes nothing because God still calls me to love Him with all of my brains, brawn, my eternal being, and to love my neighbor to the point that I think of them as at least as important as I am.

Oh man, that was exhausting. Please, argue with me, comments are welcome, shout, agree, disagree, share your point of view, whatever, but don't hold back. Learn to explore what you think, what you feel what you know, what you believe. You may find out things are not at all as they seem in your world. You might even change your mind on some things. But mostly, you will KNOW where what you are saying comes from. Yes, keep your Bible close, but keep the God that promised to make his home inside of you even closer.

What I Think Church Should Be

2014-10-11T23:44:00.001-07:00

Tonight I met a man who really made me think about what I am doing with my life, and why. His name is Paul, and he left Pennsylvania to relocate to New Mexico, on a recumbent bicycle, with a tiny trailer. http://www.signsoflifeonearth.com/
In the course of our conversation, I questioned myself a lot, as to why I do what I do, and what I really want to do. Some of you know that up until five years ago, I passionately chased a dream to own and direct my own theatre company. The reality of eight kids and our daily expenses made it impossible to keep going, so I had to reluctantly let it go, and have been somewhat adrift ever since.
For nearly twenty years, I have been self-employed in some form or other, often multiple forms at a time, and I do enjoy the freedom of it, but of late, the idea that there is something bigger I should be spending my life at is almost inescapable.I know, if you go back through this blog, you will find this as a theme.
I have also written about the fact that I have believed since youth, that God is calling me to full time ministry, but there are several dilemmas in that that I am wrestling with, even as I write this. So, at the risk of oversharing, here it is in a nutshell:

First, on more than one occasion in my life, it has been said to me that there is a call on my life to lead people in serving God. I have never disagreed with this, and actively pursued it up until my early thirties, when I all but gave up due to many, many disappointing and hurtful experiences with "christians".
I have all but given up on the institutional church and am not at all sure what Christ intended, but I am pretty sure that none of what I have personally experienced, in my highly varied church experience is it. I have seen shadows of it, in bits and pieces, but most of what I see that matches up with his His "invisible kingdom" is the fringe stuff that happens unintentionally in church communities from time to time,and generally gets shut down once it is recognized.
The church I see when I read the gospel is an ethereal thing. It does not look the same in all places, and does not serve in the same way each time it appears. It is a patchwork quilt of personalities and ideas that seem to flow into one another almost randomly, not a codified, systematic belief system that can be explained and memorized and charted by anyone willing to sit in a lecture hall long enough to hear all of the explanations surrounding it.
To begin with, all of the recorded words of its founder could fit between the pages of a single modern novel, yet the books that explain it fill libraries. It is, at it's core, the simplest philosophy that has ever been recorded, Love God with everything you are and share that love with everyone you meet. But, we are inclined to more complicated belief systems, and so we add definitions and explanations. We explain the whole thing to death and insist on our way of understanding it as the only way, while millions of others insist the same thing.
We say we believe in a salvation of Faith, through Grace, and that works cannot save, but then we build lists of Thou Shalts,and Shalt Nots that put the Levetical law to shame for its brevity. In truth, even if taken at its most literal, there are very few things that scripture dictates against, and many of those never even enter into the conversation when it comes to modern "righteousness".
So, I am going to be inviting anyone who wants to come, to meet with me on a regular basis to study and discuss what church should be, and what seeking the kingdom first is really all about, with no preconceived notion of what that "looks like", or what will become of it. Here are ten things I think the church should do, based on my reading of the teachings of Jesus.

The church should welcome anyone who comes to them, whether they openly claim to seek God, believe in a specific doctrine, or don't do either of those, period.
The church should give without thinking to gain in return, and this includes gaining by seeing their gift used wisely, there should be no gift in one hand, list of rules for finding a deserving receiver in the other.
The church should understand that their best explanations of who and what God is are all based on metaphors and figurative language, and should be willing to hear others experiences with an open heart and an ear to the spirit of discernment.
The church should spend at least as much time on promoting righteousness, and being decent citizens of the planet as it should spend on "combating evil" and "hating sin" Our example of love should be our main attraction
The church should be a place of refuge for the weary, regardless of their past, present, or future. We should not love until we believe we have exhausted all avenues of convincing someone to "accept Jesus" we should be about 70x7 for the same offense in a single day
The church should be about peace on a personal, community, national and global level, period. We should not glorify, or condone violence for violence, since our savior taught us that this is no longer the way
The church should not seek political solutions to spiritual problems. PS, every problem on this planet, according the book you claim to believe in, is spiritual at its root. We should be salt and light, we should strive to preserve, and enlighten in all times, in all places.
The church should not make decisions based on numbers, or money, since Jesus taught that we cannot serve both God and the world's wealth. The church should work to support its members,and not always the other way around, as the example was given in the first century.
The church should be led by its members, not dependent on "professional christians" to carry out its work. The word "pastor" is mentioned in the NT once in a list of other leaders that included apostles, prophets, teachers, and preachers. A plurality of interdependent leadership, accountable to the body is what is indicated in scripture, not one man who speaks for God. That system died at the cross, there is now one intermediary, and he is not among us in the flesh.
The church should strive to be revelational, not relevant. We are to be the ones who show people what life is really all about, and that does not mean just singing songs and reading our favorite verses, it means working to complete the great commission, which is an extension of the commands given to the first Adam, to fill the earth and have dominion over it. THIS DOES NOT MEAN TO HAVE CONTROL THROUGH A POLITICAL OR RELIGIOUS INSTITUTION it means we are responsible to God for the condition of this planet and its people, and we are directly responsible to love on the lives we come into contact with in any way possible. Love is contagious, and we should be about the business of infecting as many as possible.

Uhauls and used cars, or How I Got Started in Writing!

2014-09-04T13:38:00.000-07:00

After moving through six states before the age of thirteen, is it any wonder that I picture myself some sort of story teller? HA, it is no wonder that two of my first three novels feature moving vans and old beater cars, a staple of my growing up years as a church of christ preacher's kid.

My first novel was started on a Royal manual typewriter in the summer of 1985. I earned the money from cutting grass, which I hated, so I decided to turn it into something that I loved, books! Unfortunately for the world, that particular literary masterwork was never to appear in print, since a technical glitch in the form of a broken ribbon, stopped me cold on page 48. I have since lost the pages, but from what I remember it was pretty epic.

I kept writing. My next venue was a Wednesday night youth group, where we wrote comedy and drama sketches as a team. It was one heck of team, with guys like Christopher Jennings, Dave Lewis, Marty Taylor, Ryan Hackworth, Jennifer Haggard, Derek Graves and too many others to count. It was a great learning experience. You found out what worked and what didn't right away.

Then there was a musical called Boxcar Limousine that never quite saw the light of day, about the prodigal son, set in the old west. It was inspired by a piece Wesley Brainard and Mark Taylor cooked up for a Metro Church day at Frontier City. It was probably better than I would give it credit for, but since I never got the music past humming the tunes and writing the lyrics, we'll never know, will we?

Then there was a long dry spell, during which I directed about thirty stage plays and musicals and didn't have time to write. When it ended, I was walking home from my theater one night, and I told God, either give me the money for the rights to the piece I wanted to produce, or let me write my own. So, he did. It took me all of ten minutes to outline the plot of what was to become “What Goes Up” a play I produced at Family Theatre Warehouse with my friends Chad Anderson, Tim Morris, Dawn I cannot remember her last name, but she was funny, Michelle Howe, Tim Burgess, Michael Morris and some others. From there, I just kept going, “Advice From a Busboy” was next with Tom Sawyer, Peggy Hoshal, Sarah Nilson, Roger Redden, and I am sure a few others. We had a blast.

But, unfortunately, theatre is a very expensive way to share stories, and we couldn't keep it going.

Fast forward through two years of online writing for a content mill, which taught me a lot about writing fundamentals, a year and a half in social media marketing, which made me a mad skilled blogger, and down to today!

So, towards the end of Family Theatre Warehouse, I wrote this little novella, or so I thought. Turns out it was actually long enough to be a novel. I first published it on Lulu.com to see it in print, I was so excited! I think Stephen Anderson, and Jenny Dunning were the only ones to read it at the time! HA!

Now, I have decided, no one who has ever read my work said anything like, “needs a lot of work”, or that they even did not like it. Even my friend, Rene Gutteridge, author extraordinaire, who allowed me to crew on her awesome screen translation of the novel Skid, which she wrote, told me it was time to find an agent.

Well, I don't think I'm up for it, and after reading as much as I have about indie authors, I have decided to become one. I hope all of you will be patient with me, as I will unabashedly promote my stuff, without being obnoxious, I hope, until it sells, A LOT! So, if you want me to shut up, help me get it started! Lol. Anyway, here is the plan, Wishmonger got a facelift and is up for download, http://www.amazon.com/dp/B00M5MU37Q next up is The Sons of Thunder, a story about a pastor who drops out of traditional church in favor of following the teaching of Jesus, yeah, it's a comedy. Anyway, here's a snippet from it. Hope you like!

Let me set this up, Tru, our hero, has just found out that he is losing the pastorate of a church he started. He goes on a morning news show to do an interview with his ex-associate pastor along for the ride, this is part of what happens.

The anchor was sweating bullets, this was good TV and he knew it, but he felt like he was walking a tight rope, “Pastor Jensen, was this vote a ploy to get the votes against Pastor Proffitt's wishes?”

Bill Jensen looked directly into the camera,“Community of Christ cares deeply for the homeless and the destitute of this city. That's why we are building this coffee shop. Not only will it raise much needed funding for homeless programming, but every Monday evening, from 5 to 6 PM, the cafe will be open to those very people for a Bible study, directly geared to them and designed to help them in their daily struggle. We also care about our former pastor in his time of grief. What my friend here is failing to mention is that the profits from the coffee shop and the book store would be put right back into our relief missions. In fact, we project it will more than double..”

The combination of sleep deprivation, hanging with strippers, a sleepless night at the hospital, and his general disdain for Bill Jensen boiled over in an instant. Even as he spoke, Tru felt a sense of dread. This could not end well,“When? When will that happen, Bill? At least two years and you're borrowing money from a fund that should be helping people right now..”

“Tru, I know you're upset, but this is not helping, you know that we are busy helping the poor and the disenfranchised. We serve breakfast twice a month at the rescue shelter and we sponsored six families last Christmas which is a lot for a congregation of our size...” Bill Jenses seemed to be enjoying this.

“Look around Bill. It's not enough, whatever we're doing is not enough. You think people need a Bible study in your damn coffee shop? You can walk four blocks in any direction from this studio and find people who could've used that money today, last night, last week, not two years from now!” Tru stood up from the sofa and walked over to the street side windows a camera man following close behind.

Bill turned toward the camera on his right, away from Tru and smiled smugly into the camera“You know you're crazy, right?”

“So, what? That's supposed to disqualify me?" Tru headed back toward Bill Jensen, somewhere alarms were going off in his head loud enough to keep him from launching himself on top of the man,"All of the Biblical prophets were a little nuts. John the Baptist lived in the wilderness wearing camels hair and eating bugs, Balaam talked to a donkey, Jonah was swallowed by a whale, Elijah called bears out of a forest to consume children who made fun of his hair and Ezekiel communicated with extra terrestrials. You think just because we haven't seen a real prophet for a couple of generations that they're gone? They'll be back and when they do come back it's going to be the kind of carnival sideshow that only happens once in a millennium.”

Tru walked off the set and down the hall toward the dressing room where his jacket was. He was done. The intern in the jeans and Tshirt followed him with his clipboard, “Sir, we need you to come back for the next segment, they told me they have some follow up questions.”

“No,” Tru stopped and turned to him,”Tell them I apologize, but I will not sit out there and pretend not to be outraged by what this man has done to the Church that I loved and my wife's memory. Here is your microphone, good day.” He carefully pulled the microphone from his pocket and handed it to him, un-stringing the cord from his shirt.

The book takes place in Oklahoma City, which should be fun for a lot of my friends, and it is funny, if I do say so. I am planning to launch it on Sept 19^th, so stay tuned!

Three Things We Did to Raise Awesome Kids!

2014-08-14T07:36:00.001-07:00

Two of my eight kids have made it, to college, that is. Two home schooled students, accepted to major universities, and receiving scholarships. If this doesn't do it for you, they both choose worship experiences, quiet times with friends and service projects when they are free to make their own choices. SO, how did we raise such awesome kids?

I would like to say there was some grand plan, but to be perfectly honest, we have mostly taken a one day at a time, allow the child to find their way approach, while offering lots of guidance, clear cut guidelines for behavior in our family, and as many opportunities to do the things they were passionate about as we could afford.

I know that's not very specific, so here at three things we did that I think all parents should do to get great kids.

Know them. This may sound flippant, but it's not. In this day and age, most parents spend maybe an hour or two per day in the presence of their younger children, and almost none by the time they reach high school. We not only home schooled our kids up to high school, and my oldest son until graduation by his own choice, but we are also self employed, a choice that allows us to know our kids. We are there for them, one hundred percent. We attend every concert, every game, every play. We know those who pour into their lives and we know their friends.
Build fences judiciously, and make them clearly marked. We set up a lot of rules in the beginning, too many. So, over time we boiled it down to love God, love others, and built our household rules around that. For instance, if you ever treat your best friends better than you treat your siblings, the best friendship will be long distance, or not at all. We tried not to change the rules, unless it was necessary, we tried to make consequences fair, and we kept conflict to a minimum by not making rules we did not need to make. I learned this from my own parents. We have restrictions, but they are fair, consistent, and few.
Share your faith and ideas, don't indoctrinate. There is no way to force children into your belief system. It doesn't work. There is no way to restrict them into righteous behavior, or make them quote enough scripture to engrave it on their DNA. Share with your kids, often, tell them what you believe and why you believe it. Tell them what you expect, and what kind of consequences life will dish out for bad choices. Ask them what they believe, and use that as a springboard to converse more deeply. Point out logical flaws, and work to fill gaps in understanding, but you have no choice at all when it comes to what your children ultimately believe to be the truth.

There is so much more, that I am sure we have done, some intentionally, some intuitively, but I hope this saves somebody some frustration. Ultimately, it has been my goal, and we seem to be batting 1000 on this so far, to raise children who do not turn out to be a**holes. That's my advice, good luck, and relax, it isn't as hard as it looks. The hard stuff is up to God anyway.

What Are You Afraid Of?

2014-08-13T06:53:00.000-07:00

What would I do today if I did not care what anyone thought? Would I be awesome, take chances, make something happen? Or would I continue working only hard enough to remain comfortable, fearing the great risks of life.

For most people who have met me, fearful would probably not be a word they would use to describe me. Brash, outspoken, a bit of a radical thinker, perhaps, but not fearful. But, that doesn't make it any less true. I am afraid. I may even be addicted to safety.

I started out in life, like so many, with a lot of promise. I have several obvious talents, scholarship being among them, I rose to the top of every classroom. I started acting at a fairly young age, and got a lot of praise for my efforts. I started my first businesses as a kid, and was fairly successful. I can speak in front of any crowd, on almost any topic without embarrassing myself, but yet, I am stuck.

It seems that potential and gifts are simply what we make of them. As a wise man once said, If you think you can, or you can't, you are probably right! And so, I start another day in the life.

Right now, I am an itinerant carpenter (sounds familiar) trying to keep enough work to pay the bills, without falling off the edge in to workaholism. It isn't easy, with eight kids, two headed off to college.

I think one reason I have never ventured further is that I have romanticized my life. Surviving in the tough and gritty world, just slightly counter cultural, not caring too much about anything, critiquing it all, as if I am somehow outside the “system”. But, I'm not.

I am just as much as anyone else, caught up in the unfolding of history, and going kicking and screaming into whatever future lays in store will do little to curtail it.

I have tried, from time to time, to get in touch with who I really was meant to be. I thought I had it all mapped out for 25 years. In the end, it has always come back to how people would perceive me, and whether my mask was skillfully crafted enough to let me get by. I have mostly felt like an outsider my whole life, either feeling that I didn't understand enough to fully engage, or that I understood too much to participate, since it was meaningless anyway.

So, what to do about it? I am letting the mask slip a little today. I'm lonely. Not alone, and not unloved. I have a wonderful wife and children who make up the closest thing to a perfect family I could dream of. Not friendless, I have several very good friends that I count on whenever, although not often enough. I want community. Something larger than family, but smaller than social media. Ha!

Well, while I am at it, let's go a little deeper. I am scared. Not afraid that my life means nothing, I will probably have a greater influence than most, just by sheer numbers of offspring. Not afraid to meet God, although I know I can do better, He and I are at peace for the most part. But, I am afraid that I will miss it! What? You may ask, are you going to miss? I am afraid that in the busyness of my life, I will miss my opportunity, or that I have already had it and blown it. I am afraid that I will never be everything that I could be, or want to be. And so, I sit, afraid, like the servant with the talent buried in the ground, afraid that I will try, but no one will pay attention, afraid that I will succeed, and forget who I am in the process, afraid that I don't even know where to begin to try, and so, day after day, I drive screws and cut lumber, all the while dreaming of something more, but afraid to take the first steps.

Let me tell you who I want to be. I want to be a storyteller, and I got to do that on a small scale for a lot of years, but I want more. I want to change the way people, not everyone, but some people, how they view the world!

I have always been a writer, even did it for a living for a couple of years, and as you can see, spent quite a bit of time in the past on this blog. But what I have in mind is bigger. I want to be seen. I want people to read me. I want to make my books into movies, and even have an idea to create an entirely new form of entertainment using today's broadcast channels.

So, what am I going to do about it? I am going to begin to think as if it were already a reality! So, when you see me posting my new stories, go take a look. Tell me what you think, even if you don't agree with it! Tell me how it makes you think, does it effect the way you see things? I hope so, even if you never agree with me. I want to wake people up. I want to inspire.

This is mostly brought on by changes happening in my own life, but, Robin Williams is a personal hero of mine, in the stories he chose to tell. Not all of them, but many, were very worth telling and he did it with a passion that has only been equaled by a very few. So, what about you? What would you do today if you really did not care what anybody else thought?