Zeitgeist's Dust

El Libro De Los Espíritus

2012-01-23T19:54:00.000-08:00

What lies beyond those enigmatic brown eyes? I looked into yours, awoken from a moment of reverie. Disarmed by your gaze, I let your fingers play with the rusty spine of my life as it drew your blood. You sucked the oozing dew of red, a taste of the living iron blended with the stain of the dead. Unmindful of the foreboding preface, you turned the pages of my past. Words scribbled in the curves of innocence. You read the story that I'd written, the story that had written me. Names and places flipped by in hues of grey, black and aquamarine blue. Page by page, you unraveled my mystery. Finger prints of dirt, oil and blood. Dog ears and missing pages. Fragmented sentences and misaligned lines. Text scattered with missing commas, abrupt periods and mistakes. Words etched into the fibers of yellowed pages that smelt of summer showers and pressed flowers. Ink that refuses to run in the corrosive tears. You reached the end and shied away from my shadow of despair. Walk away knowing how it ends. Knowing how I end. Knowing this is the end.

The Boogeyman

2011-12-01T19:21:00.001-08:00

I looked into the blue orb, the light dazzling on the surface. Behemoths of the deep oceans, once free, circled around entrapped forever. Chasing shadows of the surreal light, their instincts muzzled and long forgotten, dull eyes staring at creatures from another realm. I heard him before I saw him, his feet racing towards the glass as he let out a slow "Whoooooah!" of amazement. His fingers touched the glass as his eyes followed a sea turtle that emerged from beneath and headed for the surface. I stared at his amazed face, his mouth agape, eyes glimmering with the sparkle of discovery. His nose was now pressed to the thick glass that altered reality. Untouched by the world, gleaming with an aura of unsullied innocence. We both see, yet see differently. I looked into his eyes, the blue of the sky melting into them. In my head, I gouged them out and once again I saw the world through his eyes as it once was - full of beauty and wonder.

Shit.

2011-11-26T14:06:00.001-08:00

You're shit. You're shit. You're shit. You're shit. You're shit. You're shit. You're shit. You're shit. You're shit. You're shit. You're shit. You're shit. You're shit. You're shit. You're shit. You're shit. You're shit. You're shit. You're shit. You're shit. You're shit. You're shit. You're shit. You're shit. I'm shit.

Immortality.

2011-03-22T13:48:00.000-07:00

I see you lying on the sidewalk wrapped in a banner promising a better life at a discount. Numb to the cold and the insults, you lie forgotten and abandoned. Footsteps of strangers lull you to sleep. Their words echo in your dream as you read their mind. I wonder if you hunger for pennies, food, love, a name, or death. I stare at your shriveled body, barely wrapped in rags. Your wrinkles hold the dirt of the street, your feet black as the night. Your hair knotted and a body covered in scabs. You stank of filth, penury, defeat, hatred, and death. I looked at my reflection in the storefront and looked back at you. 'Why do you live?' You looked up at me and smiled. A half-smile of the insane and the omniscient. You. You held the secret to life. The One secret that I was never to know.

What?

2010-12-18T15:13:00.000-08:00

What are you doing? WHat are you doing? WHAt are you doing? WHAT are you doing? WHAT Are you doing? WHAT ARe you doing? WHAT ARE you doing? WHAT ARE You doing? WHAT ARE YOu doing? WHAT ARE YOU doing? WHAT ARE YOU Doing? WHAT ARE YOU DOing? WHAT ARE YOU DOIng? WHAT ARE YOU DOINg? WHAT ARE YOU DOING? WHAT ARE YOU DOING? WHAT ARE YOU DOING? WHAT ARE YOU DOING? WHAT ARE YOU DOING? WHAT ARE YOU DOING? WHAT ARE YOU DOING? WHAT ARE YOU DOING? WHAT ARE YOU DOING? WHAT ARE YOU DOING? What should I do?

My Incubus

2010-11-13T19:37:00.000-08:00

I sit in the corner and wait for the darkness to flow in and merge into that shadow that I have come to know so well. My heart beats harder as I feel the chill of your arrival. I freeze as I feel your force slam me to the wall. Taste my blood as my senses bleed shades of red. Drag my body through shards leaving a trail of blood on the floor. I wince at the warm spray that burns my wounds. Your nail slices my scalp as you peel my skin, leave my flesh naked. I feel your fingers curl around my throat, feel my pulse in your hands, hear my breath as you stab into my gut and pull it slowly, twine my entrails around my neck and over the desecrated bough of the forlorn tree. Your foul breath envelops my scream that escaped through sewn lips. I feel myself rise, levitate slowly, my feet failing to find the distant ground. I look into your face in the fading light of life and recognize a face I have known all my life - mine.

Untitled

2010-11-07T17:26:00.000-08:00

It must be somewhere here. I flipped through the pages, watching the words blur. No, not here. Emptied the drawers and the closet. Looked under the bed and in the bed of strangers. Turned my world inside out and emptied it into a backpack and a pair of shoes. I won’t find it here. I faded in those abandoned eyes into a world where it lay hidden. Wake up and search, followed the road into a blind alley. It’s not here. Beyond the mountains in the land whose tongue is alien to my ears, I listen for it. It’s not here. Weary, hungry, and beaten my mind asks my restless heart - what do you seek? What was it that I had in the cradle and will only find in my grave? I no longer know.

San Francisco

2010-10-25T18:26:00.000-07:00

This will be our last moment. A moment that will encase all the other moments. Dwarfed by the skyscrapers, my insignificance sinking in, I feel your disdain at another departing lover. I know your streets, better than the lines of fate on my palms. Your secrets hidden in nooks are now mine to keep. Your many sounds, dulcet and loud. I am your lover, yet a stranger to your people. I look up at the sky searching for the stars that would someday guide me back to you. Stars that I could not see in clear skies, now cloaked in fog. I press the button and hear the metal scrape as the elevator rises behind the glass doors. Its open doors urging me to enter the nether world. I drag my bags in, things that I couldn’t let go while letting go of things that I did not want to let go. The doors close behind me. A promise of love, life, or death that will remain unfulfilled until the day I return, to never leave again. Goodbye San Francisco.

The Castro

2009-12-30T20:29:00.002-08:00

We walk in sync. You lead, and I wander across nameless streets. You talk, I listen and let you into my soul. You kiss, and I cave in, let you inside me. We talk, and we listen as you drift away from me. You sleep, and I still hear you breathe. Whisper truth in your dreams, that will foul like your breath in awakening. I hear your heart beat, tell tales of lovers. Your hand lies on my breast, skin that no longer feels like another. I taste like you, smell like you. Just as you do. Tonight we sleep as lovers, for tomorrow at the crossroads, you will leave me a stranger. Nameless, faceless, soulless. Like the one thousand lovers before me.

The Bridge

2009-12-27T14:04:00.002-08:00

I see you walk out the door as I glow amber and orange in the early morning sun. Come to me and I'll warm you in the cold. I see you wait for your ride, your eyes look the other way. Come to me and I'll give you the courage to see. I see you walk in and out, play hide and seek. Come to me and you'll no longer fear. The fog blinds me, yet I'm on your mind. Come to me and you'll find peace. I see you disappear in the dark. I sparkle like your constellation brighter than your star. Come to me, I'm your destiny. I hear you walk, feel you touch the spines of steel. Come to me and I'll drown you in bliss. I see you look down, the current is strong. Come to me and you will be free. Not yet. Not yet.

The Unanswered Question

2009-12-21T11:07:00.002-08:00

When Abel Tasman discovered this island in 1642, he called it Van Diemen's Land - Tasmania. In about 500 B.C., this philosopher was appointed minister of justice in the Chinese state of Lu - Confucius. The titles Kaiser & Czar were both derived from this earlier title - Caesar. Dating from the 16th century, goodbye is a contraction of these 4 words - God be with you. His 1742 "Aria with Thirty Variations" is usually called the "Goldberg Variations" - Bach. Coined by a 9-year-old circa 1940, it's a 1 followed by 100 zeros - Googol. Copper was named for this island where it was abundant - Cyprus. These chemicals secreted by some animals may signal alarm or attract a member of the opposite sex - Pheromones. This blue pigment was once made from crushed lapis lazuli - Ultramarine. While recovering from an illness, P.L. Travers wrote her first stories about this magical British nursemaid - Mary Poppins. This largest artery carries blood away from the heart - The Aorta. In English, this first name of Beethoven would be Lewis - Ludwig. Who are you?

Ankyloglossia

2009-11-02T07:30:00.004-08:00

I've never done this before. Neither have I. I think it's too early. I'm not sure if I'm ready. I'm scared. I feel funny. Is it supposed to be like this? I always thought it would be different. Not with you. Never with you. I can do without this. Oh, I don't need this either. What about tomorrow? Yeah, today won't be the same after this. We won't be the same after this. There's no turning back. It feels right though. I feel fine. Alright, I'll do it. I'll do it. I love you. I love you.

What if...?

2009-10-18T05:10:00.002-07:00

What if you came? What if you spoke? What if you let me in? What if you stayed? What if you loved? What if we lived? What if we hurt? What if you strayed? What if I left? What if we tried? What if we died? If only you came.

Refraction

2009-07-29T09:40:00.004-07:00

Play. Venus beckoned with her unrestrained breasts. Holding my hand as I watched the robbers seize my beloved Cossack. I headed towards him but, she held on. Tripping, I fell to the ground. I looked back at her dark eyes. Play. I headed towards him holding my wounded hand, leaving her standing. You were my cure. They stood in between us. Straighten it. I tried and recoiled in pain. I can't. Stripped, I bared my soul and all they could see was my skin. Hot oil and potions. Magic and prayers. Words and whips. Straighten it. I tried and forced it straight. Deviant laughter faded as they watched it curl in their face. Straighten it. I won't.

فردوس

2009-07-06T08:27:00.002-07:00

Latitude: 17°24'5.62"N

Longitude: 78°30'58.30"E

Together We Will Live Forever

2009-06-28T06:05:00.003-07:00

Stay. Don't die. Ever. I taste life on your lips as I steal your breath. An eternity living a lie or a moment of truth? Death, not love is my release.

Janus

2009-05-10T03:01:00.004-07:00

To you on the ledge, to you watching the waves break, to you on the bridge, to you with the gas running, to you with the slip knot, to you with the flaming match, to you with the blade at the wrist, to you with the gun at the temple, to you with the head in the bag, to you with the bitter pills, to you at the subway, to you with the detergent and acid... What are you thinking?

Life

2009-05-10T02:43:00.001-07:00

Monday. Tuesday. Wednesday. Thursday. Friday. Weekend. Life.

Welcome To My World

2009-04-03T00:18:00.004-07:00

Situated in the center of the city, yet far from the maddening crowd. Each apartment has ample access to natural light and comes with centralized air conditioning. Multilevel car parking and in home elevators make moving in and out a breeze. Biometric access with video door phone provide you the security that guarantees a blissful night of uninterrupted sleep. Every apartment is fully furnished with a king size bed, closets, sofas, and leather recliners with armrest remote to control every appliance. The kitchen is modular and has piped gas with an electric chimney to make cooking a joy. A six speaker home theater system with a 52 inch plasma television will keep you engaged in a variety of channels and motion sensitive games. You can also use the club house with two gyms and a pool. The two spacious bathrooms are equipped with the latest luxury bath accessories. Every apartment is certified by your preferred pseudoscientific design system. Welcome to my world. 100% concrete. 0% nature.

Fugly

2009-03-30T08:35:00.003-07:00

Is that yellow? The smile turned to a grimace. Bleach should fix that. You should get your teeth aligned while you're at it. That's one fat lip. You must have been a spotty teenager. You know, you should get the hair from the back of your neck to the front of your head. Is that a gray hair? Something's wrong with your jaw - You don't have one. Does your chin have a sibling? Love handles are so uncool. Wrinkles are yuck. Your elbows are too dark. You've got scrawny legs. Whoa! Is there a drought in your feet? Metamorphosis. You look beautiful. I love you. This is not me. You don't love me.

ASL?

2009-03-02T02:07:00.001-08:00

Beep. 1 New Message. Free? Yes. Whore. Ring. Last time was hot, wanna catch up? Yes. Slut. 3 Unread Emails. Couple looking to host. Yes. Bitch. Craig’s looking for NSA at hotel. 20 miles. Yes. Hustler. Alert. 2 new profile views. Coffee? Yes. Sport. Buzz. Got place? Yes. Bitch. Smell of strangers. Sore genitals. Rising libido. Impotent body. Awesome fucks don’t sate this desire, as making love to you does. Awesome, or not.

Reunion

2009-01-11T01:51:00.001-08:00

A year has passed by and I see your phantom beckon. I smile wryly and find myself underneath the Mistletoe. In the dark shadow, I see your face in the shallow grave. Black as your heart. My eyes falter to meet yours. A memory of the hurt and the hate. Beauty pales with time, so does love. Your gaping jaws speak the unspoken. Maggots crawl over you, writhing in slime. Your swollen fingers curled above the dirt, reaching out. Waiting for me to grasp them. To pull you out or to drag me in. The putrefying stench churns my guts. I step back, nauseated. I hear a shrill cry as I walk away. You were my life. Now you are more dead than death.

Déjà Vu

2009-01-09T09:14:00.001-08:00

It was a moonless night. Dark as my thoughts. The river was quiet, yet not serene. I lit a candle and set it afloat. The cold water running through my fingers. I stood at the bank watching the flame dancing in the dark, twirling, fading, disappearing. Standing by the shore, I could see the flame flicker in the sharp blade. The rays of the setting Sun, the rhythmic fall of waves. I shivered at the cold touch of metal. A flick, a cry and silence - not serenity. Darkness set in before the Sun set. A single drop of tear streamed down to the ocean from eyes that could see eternity. The waves colored by blood, a surreal tinge of orange and red. Life ends, not when the pulse dies. Life ends, when the dream dies. Everything in between, is Now.

Second Mother

2009-01-06T00:16:00.003-08:00

"Take care of these. I know you will." I looked at the pressed flowers and yellowed ticket stubs - my heirlooms. She pulled out a slip of paper from under the pillow and scribbled. Sifting through the carefully folded notes, she unfolded one. "What was his name?" I told her, for the fourth time since morning. "I don't want you to go anywhere, just stay here." I was going nowhere. "I get very restless when I leave the house. I haven't been out since summer." You need to get out Gran. "I forget things often, is there something wrong with me?" I do too, it's ok. "I feel like I'm losing my mind." She put the notes back under the pillow. Each note held a nugget of her life, a moment in time, a memory. I could see the darkness in her feeble stare - a galaxy of fading stars redrawing her zodiac with each dying star. "I don't sleep well. I'm afraid. Not that I will not wake up, but that I'll forget where I keep my notes."

Jumper

2008-07-13T07:37:00.001-07:00

The playground was deserted, hidden in the wilderness, forgotten by time. I wondered when was the last time an unscarred soul was lost here, unmindful of the foreboding darkness. I looked around, spying the phantoms of playmates from the past. The rusted swings still had a hint of blue. The ground below was depressed. I held the cold chain and recalled the restrained dreams. I stared at the setting sun, feet dangling, my mind resisting the melancholy. I wanted to fly again, reclaim my innocence, forget the lessons and be alive. I struggled to reach higher. Each thrust brought me closer to the sky, as I searched for the feeling of exhilaration that has eluded me for long. A stir in the stillness. A smile without a reason. Alone in the darkness, I finally had an answer. When do Swingers become Jumpers?