Nick ...

So... WHERE do you REALLY see yourself in 5 years???

2015-03-19T21:00:00.000-07:00

It was in Dec 2009, over 5 years ago, when there was this one question which used to haunt me and my 419 friends (of IMT) ...

It was a big question:

WHERE DO YOU SEE YOURSELF IN 5 YEARS??

Where did we hear it ... In Kapil Mohan, Hostel, Cafeteria, mock questions asked by friends, etc. etc. etc. ...

Thus we heard it ALMOST EVERYWHERE WE WENT...

Did we know the Answer to this question?

Well ... frankly, we didn't know.

And... Did we care??

HELL NO!!!

All that we cared about was to come up with an answer that would SOUND good enough and prevent any more questions. Coz we knew that it was a (I know I should mind my language) BULLSHIT Question that needed a good BULLSHIT Answer...

I remember what I said (somewhat) during my interviews:

In 5 years I see myself in an organization in a place where I am contributing to the organization's growth and learning as well as contributing to the learning process of others in the organizational structure. And I hope that its your organization.

(I remember I appeared in 17 interviews (WHAT!) for summer internship, 1 interview of pre-placement interview(eClerx) and 1 placement interview of HDFC-SL (thankfully/unthankfully I got through in my first interview), out which around 10(SI)+1(PPI)+1(P) asked this BS question and for all of these BS questions, I said this same load of crap...

I believe almost all of my friends had similar BS coming out of our pie-hole for this question as well as for the other question -

WHERE DO YOU SEE YOURSELF IN 10 YEARS...
I mean really ???
...
Do you REALLY expect me to know where I am in 10 years

(HELL I didn't even know whether I'll be having my dinner or not .. or where will I be having it ... at the mess or DLP or at sonia or balwaan da dhaba?)

Even your company or the whole country doesnt know where it will be 10 years from now...
I dont know If I will be even Alive that far into the future... Though I didn't say that)

I postgraduated from IMT on 20th March 2010.

So the question of the 5 year mark is applicable to me now (as to some of the readers too here)

On 20th Mar, 2010

What I had actually hoped to achieve by 2015, 20th Mar, was this, I think:

1) Loads and Loads of money - half way to retirement actually as I wanted to retire at 35 and go out on my own doing things I liked post that
2) A plan for my own venture and money for it - I wanted to make a mark on the world
3) A fun life style - Enjoying to the limits
4) A 1-2 months long foreign trip to my desired planned destinations
5) Other stuff about family happiness, etc. (though not of marriage and kids)

I did not care if eClerx or HDFC-SL or any other company benefitted from me or not, truth be told. They were just the means to an end.

Now I retrospect:

The past 5 years:

I have been in a private job, felt that I would have made insignificant difference to the world by the job and so quit my job for a dream (which just turned up to become a dream from out of nowhere but has grown over the years).

I remember a training exercise in HDFC-SL in which we had to act as insurance sellers (called as Financial Consultants to give them a semblance of respect) and prospective buyers. I did the exercise and acting as the customer, when I opened up about my dreams for the next 5-10 years, I realized one thing: I have big dreams but no plan to achieve them. And all the dreams were self beneficial (or, so to say, selfish) with no care for others. This made me rethink on my dreams. What I realized was that I wasn't doing enough in my life. If I wanted to achieve something bigger, I need to do bigger stuff.

The seed was sown. Then the final straw came in the sales stint, where I felt that I am simply wasting away my time here and wasn't adding much value. So, out of the blue, I sent a resignation mail to my boss - I didn't even discuss this with friends family or colleagues coz I knew their response: ARE YOU OUT OF YOUR BLOODY MIND. Actually I got this response the next day, when I told everyone..

This sudden resignation was followed by 6 months of joblessness and stay-at-home inertial state. (Details in another post of mine "NOSTALGIA ... INERTIA ...")

Then I joined BHEL as a 'temp job' before achieving my ultimate goal - "The UPSC"

I thought (and still think) that though better than private jobs, even this ain't enough... Its just a means to an end..

I planned on staying here for 1-2 years max. but then as they say, if you want to make God laugh, tell him all your plans... I have been here for 3years 363 days now (even I am amazed that I stayed this long) and it seems that I will be completing 5 years in it ... at least.

However this has also resulted in me putting a serious dampener on the plans and goal...

Anyways...

**What have I actually achieved in the past 5 years or so:**

1) I have not at all reached even the quarter mark in terms of the money planned ( :-( SAD really). I guess the plan to switch to PSU didn't help matters in this direction

2) I planned a venture of my own but put it on the back-burner in view of more urgent need of clearing IAS

3) I have NO Lifestyle now... forget fun ... I haven't been able to meet with (almost) any of my friends .. due to various reasons. Its something that I need to change but sadly this isn't happening anytime soon.

4) Forget 1-2 months vacations, I haven't had a week long vacation in India even in the past 5 years

Last (and only in past 5 years) domestic trip - Tirupati (5 days; June 2014)...
Last Foreign Trip: London/Norway (10 days; 2009)

5) On other stuff about family happiness, etc. Well we have faced trials and tribulations but this is one front on which I am happy.

ALL IN ALL...

Though I am certain to say that I have not achieved ANYTHING that I aimed 5 years ago ... I am not sad...

The fact is ...

Maybe I am not even the same guy who was there 5 years ago... And maybe that's okay ...

Anyways It has been a fun roller-coaster ride these past 5 years ...

And I certainly hope for 5 (and More) years of uninterrupted fun with achievement of all my goals and dreams...

But till then ...

Lets just Enjoy the Ride...

Oh...

And If any of you want to share where you saw yourself five years ago, where you are in your life right now and where do you see yourself five years from now (psst... you don't have to be an IMTian to respond)...

Feel free to comment ...

And till then ... Just Enjoy life ...

(Not to quote Coldplay or anything)

Viva la Vida!!!

HIStory - Just Another Wednesday ...

2014-10-14T00:23:00.002-07:00

Continuing with HIStory ...

{... A collection of stories that may/may not be related to each other ... please note that the stories are not in any exact chronological/situational order...They may not even be related ---
Hence the name ... Chapter 'W' - Just another Wednesday ... and not Chapter 2 or 3 ...
Lets see how the other chapters unfold ... Until then ... Enjoy ...}

**Chapter "W" -- Just Another Wednesday**

He was a man of routine; not a rut... just a routine.

Every weekday morning, his mobile's alarm would go off, set at 5:46am sharp "BADUP-BADUP-BADAA--BADADADADUP-BADAA--BADUP-BADUP-BADAA--BADADADADUP-DADAA--". At that very moment, he would hit the snooze button - so the mobile did not speak again to him for 6 mins.

Then at 5:52am again the mobile tried to talk with him-"BADUP-BADUP-BADAA--BADADADADUP-BADAA--BADUP-BADUP-BADAA--BADADADADUP--". Again, the snooze button. Again, no talking for 6 minutes.

Then at 5:58am again, the mobile would open its mouth-"BADUP-BADUP-BADAA--BADADADADUP-BADAA--BADUP-BADUP-BADAA--". Again, the snooze button. Again, no talking for 6 minutes.

Then at 6:04am again, the mobile would start blearing-"BADUP-BADUP-BADAA--BADADADADUP--". Again, the snooze button. Again, no talking for 6 minutes.

Then, he would wake up at 6.09.58am sharp, ready to disable the alarm as soon as it started. The Mobile would go off -"BADU"- but even before it'd complete the word, it would be dismissed. The mobile didn't like to be cutoff like that - Atleast listen to me - it'd think.

He'd take exactly 20 mins to complete his morning ablutions and activities, followed by 10 mins to make a breakfast of 1 glass of warm milk with 2 spoons of sugar, 1 spoon of chocolate powder, 4 breads and 5 almonds. He'd eat the food in 15 mins.

Then at 6.55am sharp he would start from his 2 bedroom apartment, take a walk to the bus stand, walking and counting steps - 842 steps to be exact, taking 10 mins.

He's wait for the 7.06am bus, originating 500m prior to his stop - which would come by around 7.09am, the govt. transport being well-known for its so-called 'timeliness'. He'd get on the bus, wish the now-familiar driver good morning, go to the conductor, take a Rs. 2 ticket to go with his monthly pass, then take the second seat behind the conductor's seat- preferring the window seat. He'd usually keep a book or a short story to accompany him in his journey that lasted around 1hr 15 mins.

The bus used to drop him at his stop at around 8.24am, give or take 5 mins.

From the stop it was a 10 mins walk to his office. Reaching near the gates of his office, he would go to the nearby coffee shop, exchange niceties with the shopkeeper, buy the regular - a cup of coffee and a muffin, eat the muffin, while reading the book that he would be carrying, if the time allowed it, or else, just munch down the muffin, and then move to the office door, so as to punch in at 8.50am sharp - 10 mins before the scheduled office time and 5 mins before her.

This had been so for the past 4 years, 9 months and 7 days. But now, it was all about to change.

It was just another dull Wednesday morning.

But doesn't everything extraordinary have its roots in the ordinary.

Free Will: Myth or reality - Just some half-cooked-half-raw thoughts ...

2014-04-06T03:29:00.002-07:00

Its said that God and Devil are playing a game with Human souls as wager ... that there are angels and demons amongst us ... Half borns ... All they do is just whisper into our ears ... the propensity to do great good and evil lies within us ... all that they do is just give us a nudge in one of the direction ...

(courtesy - Constantine movie)

Made me think... If this is so then there is a distorted free will scenario ... That we do everything by making CHOICES OF OUR OWN ... but the push for these choices is given by someone else... Then is that even fair ... That we suffer the consequences of these choices while these choices were actually made by someone else ... Agreed that we might be part to blame for this but but we get the Full burden of the effects.... that's not fair ...

This would make 'The law of Karma' flawed then ...

Now, off to another point -

Do we do everything because we want to ... or is it because we are meant to ... or because someone else wants us to do so ... And do we know that we want something because we want it.

And what is destiny ... they say that unless its destined not even a leaf can move on its own ... but some say that we make our own destiny .... Some say destiny is nothing ... its just coincidences - but what makes all the coincidences occur, exactly when they have to occur ...

Is there some grand design or is it the case of an absent creator ...

What to believe ... I m confused ...

Welcome to "THE GREAT INDIAN POLITICAL CIRCUS"

2012-10-24T12:06:00.002-07:00

Welcome Mr. Kejriwal ...

Welcome to the Great Indian Political Circus ...

The Biggest Circus in the Whole Damn World ...

Our Prime Attractions are:

Mute Lion (Dr. MMS)

Madame Ringmistress (Sonia G)

Baby's Day Out (Rahul G)

All Bark No Bites Dogs (Diggy, Sibbal, Manish Tiwari, Khurshid)

Elephantine Sculptress (Susri Mayawati)

Shouting Sister ( Momta Di)

Killer King-in-waiting (Modi)

Manoos Marauder (Thackareys, both Bal & Raj)

Fat Clown (Gadkari)

Goon Army Chief (Yadavs)

Royal Stagger(Have-we-made-it-large) (Beni Prasad)

Mr. All-Sense-Non-Sense (Too many come to the mind)

Hope You Have some Special Attraction prepared for yourself ...

Oh, you have !!!

You are the Magician that our circus needed...

Fantastic ...

Lets Take a small interview ... just to make sure that you are the right fit ...

Can You Pull out Rabbits of Incriminating Documents from your Hat at wish ... Yes???

Can You Shoot arrows of allegations through congress & BJP's ring of Fire ... Yes???

Do You know the Invisibility spell?
So you promise (mind you ... only promise) to make Corruption invisible ... Yes???

Oh Superb !!!

I think you are just what our Circus needs to make it more Entertaining ...

Our Spectators, the 24x7 TV News Channels (news soap-opera channels) will love it ...

they definitely need something more to see ...

B'coz Saifeena weddings, Sallu's fightings, where-is-the-stairway-to-heaven-that-ravan-found-out and Where-do-cows-go-to-die stories can't sustain them for so long ...

As far as the Poor Bloody Aam Aadmi (Raabert calls them Mango Ppl) are concerned ...

Let them be at the same place where they are ...

It doesn't matter that the prices are are soaring ... no ... just go forth and burn Electricity bills ...

It doesn't matter that there's no economic growth, or employment, neither that the poor are going meal-less for days ...

Its not of any weightage that there are increasing instances of crimes of all sorts and against all sort of people ...

Or for that matter, that the govt. plans, policies are being mismanged and funds are being misappropriated ...

You go forth and beat all around the bushes of Mr. Khurshid, Mr. Vadra, Mr. Pawar, Dr. Singh and Ms. Gandhi ...

You are the Wizard ... Spellbind them ...

Entice them ... Enchant them ...

That'll give us a fantastic Entertainer ...

And isn't that what we want ...

(though not the cure that we need) ...

I remember a quote from the past -

"A country only gets the Leader that it deserves"

I think it fits perfectly for us ...

HIStory ... The Oceanic Redemption

2012-04-25T08:50:00.001-07:00

Continuing with HIStory ...

{... A collection of stories that may/may not be related to each other ... please note that the stories are not in any exact chronological/situational order...They may not even be related ---
Hence the name ... Chapter 'Y' - The Oceanic Redemption ... and not Chapter 2 ...
Lets see how the other chapters unfold ... Until then ... Enjoy ...}

**Chapter "Y" -- THE OCEANIC REDEMPTION**

As the last rays of the sun glistened on the ocean in front of him, creating, for a brief moment, the beautiful illusion of two suns in front of his eyes, he could not help but notice that the ocean was too serene & calm.

The Ocean's Calmness captivated him ...

How contrasting was it to the turbulence going on inside of him...

He felt as if the ocean's unusual calmness was a result of its usual turbulence being absorbed by his mind. This was so different from the other times he had come to this oceanfront, to watch the turbulence in the heart of the ocean and mould it to create a sense of serenity inside of him.

Now it seemed that even his ever faithful disturbed friend had left his side. And when? At the moment when he needed it the most.

Now, even nature had betrayed him, or so he felt!

The beautiful scene lying ahead of him seemed to be questioning him. The two suns at the horizon, peering over the pink ocean looked like the two ends of the paths that lay ahead of him, both burning, searing his heart.

The choice that lay ahead of him troubled him.

One path, though with a bright and radiant end, crossed through a sea of fire; the other, which had a bright rosy path, seemed to end in a ball of hell-fire.

Inside of him, a war was raging. His heart was leading a mutiny against his brain. The oppressive brain, which had ruled till now with an iron fist, now seemed to be losing grip. He looked at the outside world - people walking around, kids playing, families sharing moments of love & compassion and friends sharing moments of camaraderie that they would remember for the rest of their days.

No one seemed to know of - or care for - the war that was going on right next to them. The battalions of his heart & brain were charging at each other with maddening pace, assaulting with weapons of mass destruction and slaughtering each other's soldiers like they never mattered.

To the outside world this was invisible; to his inside world, the carnage was unbearable to watch.

He wanted to stop it, but felt as if he had lost all control. All he could do was stand in the midst of this war-zone, battle scarred, and wait till one side loses.

Though he knew that it will be a Pyrrhic victory, as the victor may be any part of him,

but he will lose.

He felt his eyes welling up and a tear emerge from one of them. Normally, he would have stopped it, wiped it, swept it as if under a rug with a swipe of his hand. He had never allowed the outside world any peak into his inside. But today, he couldn't gain control, and so he let the tear roll down from his eye.

It flowed like a slow moving river - a salt water river - from the glacier of eye, sliding down the mountain of his nose, over to the plain of his cheek, and finally, after a brief stoppage at the delta of his chin, it fell freely through the air as if running to meet the ocean of sand that lay beneath him. The earth below absorbed it instantly.

His eyes looked around and were surprised. When others had tried to connect with him, know him, see him, touch him, feel him, he had never allowed them. But today, when he had finally opened up, allowed a piece of himself for the others, nobody cared.

There was no one by his side to wipe his tears, comfort him, advise him, for the only person that could have done that, was lost.

He closed his eyes for a brief moment. And in this moment, he felt detached, lost from the world. A sudden feeling of grief came over him and nothing else mattered now - not the outside world, the people, the ocean, the two suns, the two paths that lay ahead of him, not even his own self.

For he knew that the only thing that ever mattered, was gone.

He opened his eyes again. What lay in front of his misty eyes seemed like a distant dream.

A young couple was sitting in front of him, basking in the retreating radiance of the sun, while enjoying the warmth of each other's embrace. This was the power of young love. The radiance on their faces was greater than the gleam of the sun, as if the sun was shining by reflecting their light. Their feet were in the warm water of the ocean, which seemed to be silently caressing them with soft waves, in turn drawing water from their sea of love.

Their love seemed to be the life-force of the whole world - as if the very existence of the cosmos was derived from this power of love.

The cosmos was drinking from the nectar of love

As if it was preordained, the two suns merged with each other at that very moment at the horizon. The sun, the sky & the ocean were one now, with a rosy hue covering the world ahead of him. The war had ended.

There was serenity and calmness, both outside and inside now -

now that the path was found.

The sun went to rest in the heart of the ocean and the world started to grow darker, as if signalling to him about the path ahead. But he knew he had to wade through the darkest of nights to make the sun rise again.

And his newly victorious heart told him that the sun will rise again.

He calmly decided to return now, thankful to his ever faithful friend for showing the path. As he left, he saw the young couple still sitting there, enjoying their young love & their beloved's embrace while the darkness grew and the ocean started grumbling again, the tidal waves growing in size.

The moon lit the deserted beach again when he was gone. No one was there to adore its beauty, just wet sand - sand made wet by the salty ocean & the salt laden tears.

The moon - greeted by the lonely beach

HIStory ...

2011-04-23T09:37:00.000-07:00

CHAPTER ONE --- THE LAST ACT

...... And the Italian brought a false expression of remorse on his face and said,

"Mi dispiace amico! Wrong Answer... You're dead!"

And now, the guy was a perfect case of a hopelessly lost cause.
All that was left was a 'Click' and 'BANG' ...

HIS STORY would end in seconds...

Now, they say that the fastest way to die/kill someone is through cyanide, but a bullet through the brains is not too goddarn slow either...

A clear shot with a bullet piercing the brain can almost instantaneously end it for anyone. With the brain dead, nothing lasts for long, though it has been told by some medical scientists that the heart can continue for upto 4 hours - a probability of a miracle you'd say - some respite for this down-on-luck poor guy ...

But just think - what luck would he have in these gloomy, dark and dingy by-lanes of the northern coast of Palermo. Had he been lucky, he would never have been in this goddamn location in the first place. Instead, he'd be on a plane, on the way to Marseilles and with a million Euros worth of contract in his account.
Oh! how everything changes in a day.

As the sun was rising today, he was expecting to become a rich man and now, while the sun is setting, he's lying here on his knees, with his eyes staring down the barrel of a 0.38 caliber pistol.

Even nature had become a reflection of his life today - yes, so true -

The sun was really setting on him.

Now, it will be several minutes ... nay, hours, if not days, before anybody would even come across his, by then, already dead body.

But strangely enough, these weren't the thoughts in his minds. He wasn't thinking of his situation, death, escape, respite, mercy or even miracle. He wasn't even thinking of afterlife, its existence or possibility of him having an afterlife and what he'd be in his next life, something that he had thought earlier in his life.

No, strangely, it was a feeling of NOTHINGNESS.

He had just given it all up and was suddenly ready to face his fate. He had internalized it all and was just recollecting his life now. From, the moment he had heard the Italian's words, his whole life had come to him in a flash ...

(As they say in a cliché, hackneyed way ... your life flashes when you're about to die... And you see a long bright Tunnel... Well, we don't know much about the tunnel part here)

He felt like a distant observer watching his life buzz past him in an instant. It was like watching a movie in with scenes playing in front of him.

But what was strange was the fact that these scenes didn't evoke any emotion in his heart. He felt disattached and unaffected, as if none of these things mattered to him.

Suddenly he realised that inspite of whatever he had thought of his life - that his life was so great, with so many unforgettable and soul stirring stories and moments, he didn't feel anything ... no ... nothing at all.

Nothing evoked any emotion in him. Not his special childhood memories, not his school days, no - not even his college days. Not even his work, which he thought was his calling and his true love.

In that one moment, as his whole life passed by him, he was left wondering,

Have I even lived my life ...
Is this what I wanted from it ... not a single moment worth evoking ANY feeling ...

Now, he thought -

Maybe its good enough that I'm losing this life ...
'coz I've already wasted it ...

But the important question was ...
Had he Really???

NOSTALGIA ... INERTIA ...

2011-03-21T10:44:00.000-07:00

Nostalgia ...

The Feeling of Home Sickness, is derived from Greek words 'Nostos' - Home and 'Algos' - Pain i.e. Pain for Home ....

This feeling is usually experienced by people living far far away from their families and homes.

But Why Am I talking about it???

I live in NOIDA with my own family ... and for the past 6 months, I have become more & more (infact, almost completely) a home person with little outwardly exposure, if any ... My friends and family can testify it ...

So What Do I know about Nostalgia ... and What am I being nostalgic about ... My job has always kept me near my family and now even though I'll join a PSU after a sabbtical of 6 months, I'm still gonna be in NOIDA for the next 6 months ... atleast ...

Well This Nostalgia is not the pain for home ... Infact its the pain for leaving the state of worklessness and idleness that I'd fallen into for 6 months ... Now that I'll have to go Back to the wreck of a life of the so called Corporate ...

Well So, on second thoughts, let's not call my present state of mind as Nostalgia ... let's call it INERTIA ...

'Coz I wasn't pained at all when I thought I'd have to go to Bhubhneshwar, Damanjodi, Bokaro, Nagpur, Allahabad, and so on ... In fact I was ok with it ... if not happy ... So I wasn't paining for Home at all ....

Its my state of inertia which I m pained to leave ... this External force of BHEL is really changing my state of Rest (coz, there was no uniform motion ... no there was no motion at all ... in my lifestyle of the last 6 months) ...

Looking back at the past 6 months and 18 days -

4 sept - the day of saying Talaaq ... Talaaq ... Talaaq ... to HDFC SubStandard Life ...

Then days of going to places to find out the best avenues for next steps ...

And then wasting all my earnings on wrong decisions ...

Infact my total earnings at HDFCSL were really really BAD INVESTMENTS ...

Wherever I invested them ... Whenever I invested them ... They always found a way to the drain and always went down it ...
(Hopefully that luck changes with BHEL coz I really can't afford 4 more years of Bad investments)

Then Going to a regular curriculum of daily doing just 1 thing at a fixed time (not actually fixed but close to it ... and my whole day was planned in accordane to it) ...

And not to forget the countless Written tests, Interviews and train or flight journeys all across India to give them ...
and These 3 hours of Tortures reqd. 3 weeks of preps which I never did ...
Usually last day technique was my tactic and strategy ... and It worked too ...

Sometimes I felt like I was golden for Writtens ... especially those of MBA - marketing, operations, anything in the whole goddarn world... cleared them all... It was ecstatic ...

This all was a long drawn process: from I written in 22 Aug 2010 to last interview in 10 Mar 2011 (still many results awaiting ... and the BAAP of it all is still awaiting ... but am not gonna dwell on that right now)

Finally finished it and then went to a rut situation for 11 days where I have been doing nothing but sleeping, eating or on PC watching movies or playing games ...

BUT

Now I'll have to study Electronics, go to office learn power generation and so on...

Thus the Second law of motion is gonna hit me real hard now ...

DAMN YOU NEWTON !!!

Guzarish : A Magical Creation of a Genius

2011-01-05T10:50:00.000-08:00

Well, I just watched the Best movie of the year 2010 ...

And I must say its better than not just any Hindi movie, but also all the Hollywood movies of the year ....

This One deserves to go to the Oscars and Win it too ....

I m talking of Sanjay Leela Bhansali's Magical Creation:

GUZARISH

The movie is Magic .... Literally !!!

To all those who didn't like it ... Go get your hearts checked guys ... is it still in the right place ....

To all those who haven't watched it ... Watch it guys ... don't miss out on it ... It is certainly worth it ...

Now, I haven't seen Anand ... but seeing KHNH, I know know that these are movies that celebrate the spirit of life in the face of death ...

But Guzarish is different ..... It is: The celebration of Life by embracing Death ....

And there can be no better way to say it than through the vision of Sanjay Leela Bhansali, the director behind the visions of Khamoshi and Black .... In a way, its the completion of his Trilogy.

And through the character of Ethan Mascarenhas .... the soul of the movie .... the movie shows a character that is different than the present day characters that are made on the mould of Raj, Rahul phenomenon, started by Shah Rukh Khan and Yash Raj/Karan Johar.

This is a character who has a soul, a depth, a feel and a touch.

And yeah, Kudos to Hrithik Roshan for playing this character with near perfection .... Though at some places in the beginning he looks like Rohit of Koi Mil Gaya, until he raises his acting skills to a newer level at a later stage ....

The other actors are good too ... especially Aishwarya Rai(whose best acts have come under the tutelage of SLB), Shernaz Patel and even Aditya Roy Kapur (at some places).

The movie talks about a serious topic - Euthanasia - or as its called 'Project Ethanasia'. It also dwells into the problems faced by the quadriplegics. It also talks about the dignity of life and death ...

But most importantly it makes one realise the Gift of Life that we still have with us ... that Ethan Wants .... not a life with just breath coming in & out ... but the life that allows us to feel, touch, sense everything and do something with it .... The ability to take something and convert it to something far bigger and greater ...

The movie is not a brainless comedy or a remoulded love story with the same old story of boy meets girls falls in love etc. etc. or a action movie with people taking out hand pumps with hands or in that case, its neither a period drama or based on true story ....

Still it is more Real than most of these types of crassy and crappy movies ...

In fact its SURREAL ....

---

P.S. - The movie has been called by many of my friends as bore ... but it is not ... In fact at many place it is fun ... At all, but one or two places, there is no wasted reel for showing story that is unrelated to the movie or doesn't bring the story forward ... and those one-two sequences are none other than the song-dance sequence that could have been done away with.

To Hell and Back

2010-07-18T03:31:00.000-07:00

Everyone wants to run through the streets ...

shout out at the top of their lungs ...

have parties with friends ...

play games and watch movies with family ...

eat all the delicacies that they can lay their hands on ...

or even if one is lazy ...

they want to sleep with no tensions or troubles ...

BUT

How Does it feel to not be able eat ...
to even let a drop of water not go down your throat ....

How does it feel when you are not able to even speak ...
though you know that you haven't gone mute ...

How does it feel when one can't sleep easily ...
But can't even stay awake due to tiredness ...

How does it feel when one you can't do anything ....
I mean ANY thing at all

That how I was feeling for the past 10 days ...

It all started with a little bit of harmless kaccha aams one evening ...

1-2 days later, I have a little throat ache but hey, its okay ...

Its change of season ...

this sort of stuff usually happens at change of season ... will go away in 1-2 days ...

Now comes the great Indian Rains ...

at the wrong place ... to the wrong people ... at the wrong time ...

I get caught in the downpour ... and my tonsilitis gets caught up in itself ...

Next thing I know ... its evening and I've fever of 101F

NOW WHAT???

I start plummetting into the depths of abyss de tonsilitis ...

Q- What does it take to kill a person ...???

A - Direct Contact with too many doctors ...

(not funny ... wasn't meant to be)

Its takes 4 doctors, 2 hospitals, 8 injections (atleast) ... and millions of medicines (wat???) ...

to get someone from 101 to 107 F in a 10 day rollercoaster ....

In the meanwhile these 'doctors' act more like mechanics, trying to puncture me everywhere from throat to hands ... I feel like a specimen up for their experiments ... they say c'mon ... today its time for CBC .... that done ... its time for Throat swab or some other such thing ...

And then proudly prounounce their verdict ...

"I think its enlarged tonsilitis, but I'd like to conduct other tests. I havn't seen such enlarged tonsilitis in my whole life"

Well great ... ain't that ... so you'd want my mouth for your study ... take it ... better still ... why don't you take my tonsils and put them as mannequins on a doctor museum ... then kids will come and see...

2010- This is the great Indian Tonsilophilis monster. Slain by the great Dr. XYZ ... for this act of bravery he got a (ig)Nobel Prize...
(Oh...We forgot to mention...this was contributed by the generous Mr. Nikhar Shukla)

well ... now ...

Even the thought of a doctor is nauseating ...

P.S. :

I had just finished reading Eric Segal's 'Doctors' -

A fiction based novel centred around the lives of the

class of Harvard Medical School of 1962

... Cool Book ....

Finished the book on monday ... got sick on tuesday ...

NOW THAT IS IRONY

REAL LEADERSHIP

2010-05-29T10:56:00.000-07:00

'A Leader Should Know How to Manage Failure'

Question to APJ Abdul Kalam: Could you give an example, from your own experience, of how leaders should manage failure?

APJ Abdul Kalam:

Let me tell you about my experience. In 1973 I became the project director of India 's satellite launch vehicle program, commonly called the SLV-3. Our goal was to put India 's "Rohini" satellite into orbit by 1980. I was given funds and human resources -- but was told clearly that by 1980 we had to launch the satellite into space. Thousands of people worked together in scientific and technical teams towards that goal.

By 1979 -- I think the month was August -- we thought we were ready. As the project director, I went to the control center for the launch. At four minutes before the satellite launch, the computer began to go through the checklist of items that needed to be checked. One minute later, the computer program put the launch on hold; the display showed that some control components were not in order. My experts -- I had four or five of them with me -- told me not to worry; they had done their calculations and there was enough reserve fuel.

So I bypassed the computer, switched to manual mode, and launched the rocket. In the first stage, everything worked fine. In the second stage, a problem developed. Instead of the satellite going into orbit, the whole rocket system plunged into the Bay of Bengal . It was a big failure.

That day, the chairman of the Indian Space Research Organization, Prof. Satish Dhawan, had called a press conference. The launch was at 7:00 am, and the press conference -- where journalists from around the world were present -- was at 7:45 am at ISRO's satellite launch range in Sriharikota [in Andhra Pradesh in southern India ].

Prof. Dhawan, the leader of the organization, conducted the press conference himself. He took responsibility for the failure -- he said that the team had worked very hard, but that it needed more technological support. He assured the media that in another year, the team would definitely succeed.

Now, I was the project director, and it was my failure, but instead, he took responsibility for the failure as chairman of the organization.

The next year, in July 1980, we tried again to launch the satellite -- and this time we succeeded. The whole nation was jubilant. Again, there was a press conference. Prof. Dhawan called me aside and told me, "You conduct the press conference today."

I learned a very important lesson that day. When failure occurred, the leader of the organization owned that failure.

When success came, he gave it to his team. The best management lesson I have learned did not come to me from reading a book; it came from that experience.

------------------------------

Now That's Leadership ...

The Betrayal

2010-04-28T10:04:00.001-07:00

Sometimes ... it feels ...

Life's a movie playin' reel by reel...

Sometimes ... it feels ...

Life's a dream ... it is so surreal ...

But now I know ...

Life's a Burden I can't get off my Back ...

Oh how to show ...

I m afflicted, chained on this Rack...

You said ... that I am ...

Safe within your arms, Always ...

Then why ... do I feel ...

There's a thorn within my heart; I'm Betrayed.

KILLSON RACQUET

2009-11-28T03:55:00.000-08:00

Watch this Funny Tennis Racquet Commercial that we made:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=kQELLMYD-SU

And share how do you like (unlike it)

This I Swear

2009-07-13T00:36:00.000-07:00

Here's a short poem that I wrote:

Hope you like it

I Swear to you,

I never gonna leave you ...

Till forever comes.

I gotta reach to you,

Never will betray you ...

Till my time is done.

You'll always be there,

Even if you're not there ...

'Coz you're always in my breath.

Whatever I do ...

Wherever I go ...

No matter what ...

THIS I SWEAR

LONDON DREAMZ ...

2009-07-09T22:50:00.000-07:00

It was a very Interesting experience for me ...

I watched how people out there lived in such complete perfect order, no bending of rules.

I watched places which looked as if cut out straight from heaven.

I saw parliaments and prime minister of UK and also the royal family.

I saw how Indians can be found everywhere.

I got an idea of what Indian Food tasted (for the English and Norwegians).

I had experiences on land, in air and in the Sea.

I saw angelic eyes and Beautiful faces.

People so interesting, worth being remembered for a lifetime.

I saw what life was for them and what stark differences were there from our lives, yet how similar.

And yes,

A Royal Tribute to a King ... A King of Hearts ...

The King of Pop ...

A Deserving Farewell ...

The tribute performed by the Royal Guards and Royal Band at the Change of Guards ceremony at Buckingham Palace!!! Royal Guards playing Thriller, Dangerous, Bad, Jam, Invincible ... in front of a capacity crowd ...

WHAT A SIGHT !!!

I saw all kinds of people, places and things ...

A lifetime in a week ...

I got a feel of LIFE ...

And ...

DEATH

One of the biggest and most shocking experience of my Life ...

I watched a person on the verge of death ...

Brought back to life by a stroke of luck only.

It was something I won't ever forget... How you lose someone close, special in just a moment ...

How the world goes round ....

How it shows that everything you have can just slip away .... and there's nothing you can do but pray ... pray for help ... for Divine Intervention ... for Miracle ...

I WITNESSED A MIRACLE

Lazy Days ...

2009-05-17T00:53:00.000-07:00

People have sometimes asked me ... hows lyf in Mumbai ...

To tell you in short ...

I dont like the city that much ...

from the HUGE crowds in local trains ...

to the always hot temperature ...

to the local language of marathi (which I m trying to decipher by the way but still haven't been successful completely ... some words have been understood ...) ...

I got sick in the 1st month that I came here ... had to take a leave of 3 days ...

And then there is the work load ... COMPLETELY DIFFERENT FROM IMT ...

------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Wake up at 8 am at the latest ... just imagine it ... even for a 8:30 am class ... we wake up at 8:32 am ...

Then I have to get dressed... atleast theek thaak kapde pehno ... no going in lowers and slippers ... my fav attire of IMT ...

Finally Breakfast and then run to the railway stn. which thankfully is only 4 mins run away from where I stay ... so I get my regular 4 mins exercise for the day ... not 8 mins coz waapas aatey hue toh thaka hota hoon ... so exercise is out of question ....

local mein ghusnaa is a fight and talent in itself ... can write an essay on it ... but wont ... coz those who have travelled already know it ... and those who haven't need to travel to understand it ...

to just give you a picture ... imagine the nazi concentration camp ... that's the packing in a local train ...

then finally going to the office ... time of arrival : 10 -10:20 am ... from the hot exteriors of the city to the relieving interior of a centrally air cooled office ...

then a 10 hr work of the office ... CANT TALK ABOUT IT B'COZ OF CONFIDENTIALITY AGREEMENT ... just kidding ... can talk but wont ... coz I dont want to ... ;)

then by 8 pm I m drained ... and then I have to go back home ... another 1.5 hrs ... reacing there by 9:30 pm ... then dinner starts by 10:30 pm (the chefs there dont even start preparing the food before I come ... don't know why ... no matter what I tell them they continue this tradition) and ... finally after dinner finishes at 11:00 pm (sometimes later coz I m a slow eater) ... I watch a movie ... in dinon good movies are cuming at 11:00pm thanks to IPL ...

Finally ... go to sleep at 1:30pm ... have to coz another day is looming in my head ...

-------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

But then there is the dream of saturday and sunday ... the days I dream of ... no work ... only sleep ... on these days ... I go to sleep at 5:30 am.. dats in the morning... (if I want to) ... and wake up at 2pm-3pm on the afternoon .... then lunch ... then movies... games ... rest ... novels ... net ...

TIME FLIES ... and I am there again for the gruelling weekdays ...

-------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

P.S. : I got my reward for the efforts ... the 1st quarter of my stipend ...

My First Blog ...

2009-04-30T02:03:00.000-07:00

Hello Everyone ...

This is your old friend Nick here ...

If anyone is thinking that why have I started to blog then here is my answer ...

I used to hear that everyone is blogging ... Amitabh Bcchan, Aamir Khan, Shahrukh Khan, Imran Khan (the Actor ... Don't know 'bout the cricketer), Narain Kartikeyan ... even people like Raghu of Roadies fame. Then I saw that I had a few of my friends that had started blogging too ...

I saw this all and thought, "Well ... this is a good way to express yourself (I m not quoting Airtel). If you have something to say and feel anything ... why not keep it out in the open."

If anyone wants to say anything then why wait ... JUST SAY IT !!! ...

Well this is just the beginning ...

Watch out this space for anything from my side ...