I.C.U

How was your night?

2021-02-02T20:18:00.001+01:00

Innocuous question right?

Well, what if the response you got after cheerfully asking your female colleague this question early in the morning was, “F*** off! It’s none of your dam* business!”

What if she screamed this at you in a crowded elevator while you and other members of your team were on the way to the office? True story.

I recently saw a social media post of a young Nigerian lady cautioning her followers that it was rude to ask a woman how her night was. Seeing this post reminded me I had come across this same information before, while reading on cultural nuances in the country I now lived in since I emigrated from Nigeria. Further research led me to the blog post that captured the true story in the opening paragraph of this post.

The basic premise is this, and feel free to correct me if you have more accurate information- asking anyone how their night was seems to imply you’re trying to find out how the sex went last night.

Outrageous?

What the hell?!!

I hear your expletives. I hear you scream.

To be fair, I also hear another camp condescendingly ask, “Is that not obvious?

Euphemism:

The oxford dictionary defines this as: A mild or indirect word or expression substituted for one considered to be too harsh or blunt when referring to something unpleasant or embarrassing.

I faintly remember stumbling on this word as a keen eyed teenager when I decided I was going to read the whole dictionary. Pardon me; I think it must have been a mild head injury from a fall or something. Scratch that. Moderate head injury; because I remember also being keenly interested in the etymology of words at the time.

Anyway, I stumbled on the fact that one of the earliest synonyms for what we now know as toilet was ‘privy’, with its earliest citation in an Oxford English dictionary from 1225. Since then we’d had chamber pot, potty, little house, outhouse, head, john, cousin john, cuzjohn, jake, water closet, dunny, lavatory, bathroom, ladies room, cloakroom, restroom, women’s room, throne, powder room, honeypot, biffy, netty, loo…

Let me shock you- The above list is not comprehensive!

Basically, for as long as man has been able to ‘take a shit’, we have always been embarrassed by it, even though it is a basic physiological requirement. As a matter of fact, when the excretory system does not work as needed, it is a super uncomfortable feeling- Trust me, I’ve spent some time in general surgery. I have seen the agony from unpleasantly close proximities.

Roses and Shakespeare

Since I moved abroad, I’ve had to also shorten bits of my name to make it easier for communication at work seeing how some of my ‘oyinbo’ friends seem to lose the plot once a name is stretched beyond 2 syllables. Again, I’ve heard many arguments from fellow Nigerians in diaspora of how allowing this somehow meant I was ashamed of my culture or how they would learn to pronounce it if they had any respect for our people. I honestly appreciate and understand these concerns but to each his own. My reasoning is simple, paediatric even- you may say. I spend a bit of time on the phone taking and making referrals when on call and making phone calls at work generally and think it’s a bit of a ‘faff’ if I spend half that time teaching the person on the other end of the line the correct pronunciation of my full name. They’d probably mispronounce it anyway and sometimes it sounds really awkward to hear. The sheer irony is that by Nigerian standards, my name is pretty easy to enunciate!

I’m quite confident in my identity and all I stand for that I’m happy to ignore these cultural and identity battles and just carry on with work. In our spare time, I’ve told close ‘oyinbo’ friends my full name and tried, often with little success to teach them the correct pronunciation. When faces begin to turn red, I quickly quote the famous Williams Shakespeare: A rose by any other name would smell as sweet!

We laugh and move on.

Concluding Quips

Now that you have taken a peep into my mind, perhaps you might empathize with me on why I find it hard that a question as innocuous as ‘How was your night?’ would cause such anger and uproar. I understand and even support the need for a more sensitive and kinder society but I probably also get why some people are quick to quip with derision ‘Social justice warrior!’ when such a dissent comes up.

A 2011 paper by Aminoff et al is famous for stating that we spend about a third of our lives sleeping or trying to. It therefore feels to me that with a gun to my head, I’d guess you most likely spent last night sleeping, and not give a hoot what part your genitalia played during that period.

The Holy Bible in Proverbs 11 vs. 12 (NCV) says that “People without good sense find fault with their neighbours”.

With age, reading and understanding, I have increasingly come to ignore what is said or done. Rather I find myself peeling through layers and layers of context, cultural nuances, most likely intent, and available information before I decide whether or not to get upset about things.

Anyway, just to be sure, if I must employ a conversation starter with a colleague, I’d probably ask ‘Did you sleep well?’

Better that than get inundated with emails from HR about my use of language. When I get back home, back to the clarity and serenity I find in my thoughts, I can then laugh heartily at how crazy the world is.

Author

Oluwaseyi Adebola is the author of the collection of short stories, ‘A Cluster of Petals’ which was shortlisted for the 2019 Quramo Writers prize and the 2019 AFIRE Linda Ikeji prize for fiction. Purchase links and reviews available here: https://linktr.ee/aclusterofpetals

He is a medical doctor who works in the UK and also has a master’s degree in translational neuropathology from the University of Sheffield. Follow him on twitter @laylow1388

Bad Man by Oluwatweezy Dance Challenge

2021-01-29T19:03:00.007+01:00

How would you like to win 100 thousand Naira this February?

You can do it while dancing to great soulful music. Yipee!!!

It takes 3 simple steps really:

Step 1. Follow @oluwatweezyofficial on instagram

Step 2. Download his hot new tune, 'Bad Man' via the link on his bio. The song is also available for download beneath, on his Soundcloud page, Itunes, Spotify and several other blogs and music platforms.

Step 3. Record a dance video of yourself and partner or dance crew dancing to the song. An example is on the Youtube page beneath. Kindly limit the video to a maximum of 2 minutes. Feel free to play around with any concept you fancy. Upload the video on your Instagram page and use the hashtag #OluwatweezyBadMan

Get your followers to like, share and comment on your video!!!

The winning team would be chosen based on creativity, originality and social interactions generated (e.g likes, comments and shares)

Stay tuned on this blog and @oluwatweezyofficial for the official announcement of the winner on the 28th of February 2021 by 6pm Nigerian time.

Ciao!

Download Bad Man by Oluwatweezy

Click to watch dance video sample

Click to listen to other works by Oluwatweezy on Soundcloud

Click to watch Oluwatweezy's videos on Youtube

Song Review: "Ogara" by Misty Breezy

2015-02-14T18:16:00.001+01:00

Ogara is the top notch brand new single by Misty Breezy, born Ifeoluwa Awelewa. He is one of those rare breeds with an innate ability to entertain. Originally from Ekiti, Nigeria, he now lives in London, United Kingdom. He discovered his affinity for music during his university years and has since done lots of songs underground with a lot of artistes in Nigeria and United Kingdom. Like everything else he does, his immeasurable desire to succeed shines forth in his music syllable for syllable, snare for snare.

His style of music varies: slow, mid-tempo tunes infused with African flavor, rooted in the great and rapidly evolving Afro Pop genre.

Mr. Gorgeous, Mr. Jovial Misty Breezy is a born entertainer with a special 'thang' for dem ladies and party marshals. Ogara's incredibly superb beat was produced by Scope Nero before being blessed by the delivery of Misty Breezy.
Ladies and gentlemen, are you ready to be amazed?
Click away on the links below to download the song and follow the You tube link below to watch its spectacular video.
Not many valentine gifts come better packaged. Happy Vals!

DOWNLOAD OGARA

WATCH OGARA VIDEO

Artery 'n' Vein

2014-12-12T13:46:00.001+01:00

Tweezy has returned once again with another timeless piece of art. The song 'Artery and vein' is a beautiful song for romance, love and life. The lyrics are top notch, the delivery is superb and the beat is the work of a producer who knows his craft. As the biology geeks will tell us, just like an artery and vein run side by side on their course to sustain life, this song is a story of two souls who are destined to be together.The song was produced by @Doctor_Rex and it follows 'Lai-Lai' and 'As e dey go' as the singles off his debut EP titled ORPHEUS TALES; OF ROSES & SCARS, which is already out on Spinlet and should be available for download here in a few days.

Download the song on hulkshare via this link:

Artery 'n' Vein

Don't forget to support good music, you can get the other songs on Spinlet via this link:

Orpheus' Tales; Of Roses and Scars

Another Showstopper from the stables of Shockwaves Entertainment. Tell a friend to tell a friend. It is the return of good music. Ciao!

Acknowledgements:

Song art designed by @GraimmyTheSOH, photography by Ademola Adeniran, and special thanks to the beautiful model couple Aisha and Krash for sharing this picture with us

Darris god o!

2014-05-11T18:48:00.001+01:00

On the wake of the #BringBackOurGirls campaign, one young producer, Black Zaar has tried to lend his own little voice with the only way he knows to speak: Music.
And oh, by the way, he featured a very important personality on this brand new track who goes by the name...
Wait for it...

Wait for it...

Abeg leave tory for tortoise, just gbadun the track by downloading below:

Darris god o!

Song Review: "Lai Lai" by Tweezy {Tha Bohemian}

2014-04-21T00:13:00.000+01:00

“LAI LAI” music review

“…It could be hard to believe. Probably even harder to achieve; just open your mind and then you’d see there’s a miracle inside of you…”

Every once in a while, a master of the art of music comes upon an epiphany and is inspired with a new tune. Every once in a while heartfelt lyrics hit just the right chords and a new classic is birthed. Every now and then, a song like this brand new number, “Lai Lai” blesses our eardrums.

Fresh outta tha ovens of Shockwaves Entertainment, “Lai Lai” is the 3^rd official single of an artist that is gradually creeping into the minds of R n B impresarios in Naija as the next wonder kid: “Tweezy {Tha Bohemian}. He draws from his personal life experiences as he pours out his soul on this new joint which was produced by the musical chef himself, Doktor Rex. “Lai Lai” tells the story of broken dreams, a bulwark of frustration and the drive to keep on moving on nevertheless. The melody hits you first, the words sink in, and then the soulful delivery makes you want to jump out of your seat to do that one thing everybody has told you was impossible.

First was the love tune “More than Ever”, next came the especially enjoyable “As E dey Go”; Now “Lai Lai {ObaNoDeyGoTransfer}” confirms Tweezy’s chest of musicality as the gift that keeps on giving.

Kindly click on the link below to download the song, and as you share with friends be reminded that there’s no limit to what you can do. Cheers!

Lai Lai

ALBUM REVIEW: Jesse Jagz’ ROYAL NIGER COMPANY

2014-04-21T00:09:00.001+01:00

ALBUM REVIEW: Jesse Jagz’ ROYAL NIGER COMPANY

“…my full name be Jesse Garba Abaga/ feelin’ my vibe/ jukun my tribe/ hail from Taraba/my dada didn’t...”

Remember those lines, eh? That was the first time we all met Jesse Jagz and I bet you’d agree that since he first dropped those heart thumping rhymes on us, he has grown geometrically to become quite the bulwark in the Naija Hip hop scene. His newest album- Jagz Nation Vol.2: Royal Niger Company is his second project since he nebulously left Chocolate City. It’s an 11-song album lasting for about an hour, four minutes and features artists like Tesh Carter, Jumar, DUGOD, SDC, Tupac, Fela amongst others. Production credit goes to Jesse Jagz, Ezone, Shady Bizniz and a host of other top notch producers.

‘Louis’ is a good intro to the album. Complete with a cheering audience, church bells, easy kicks, soulful singing praying for “wisdom to see that freedom isn’t free” and “…to see the lion in a G”. Jesse flows incredibly on this song with “bars more evil than Lucifer’s kind” that stirs your sense of wonder, curiosity and anticipation for the rest of the album. Without speaking on a central theme he goes ahead to display King-size bars that only truly cerebral emcees can put together- “apostle of flow/ gospel for the poor/...when emcees are spreading the fake gospel of dough/ I come through to the door/ ….the rhymes to the bones and cartilage glow…” The song finishes with a sampled impassionate charge imploring you to be charged. Oh boy! That track was quite the appetizer.

The second song ‘Jargo’ features Tesh Carter & contains samples of the Chaka Khan & Rufus 1983 hit song ‘Ain’t Nobody’ it also contains a funny & befuddling sample from the 2008 Liberian movie ‘Johnny Mad Dog’ in the beginning. It’s an Ode to the ladies with Tesh Carter calling on ladies to “…drop ,wiggle your waist and stop…” and Jesse rapping “sweet loving but she didn’t want more/ shawty we at war/ this house is dafur/ …it’s no lie, its love & hate/ shrugs & aches…”

‘Oceans & Lakes’ is an easy love song. It features Sarah Mitaru & DUGOD (a producer on the project) and he delivers some ‘Thug mansion’ type bars not aligned with the love-inclined theme of the song. It’s spiced with guitars, electric bass and trumpets.

Any artist that samples properly is one that understands a certain level of musical history, and anyone that samples Fela (May his Soul R.I.P) is a brave artist. ‘Sunshine’ is a decent fusion of Hip Hop and Afrobeat. It makes it difficult to combine tapping your feet, bobbing your head with listening to Jesse’s impeccable rhyming, showing that he is indeed in “another league” spitting fire flows for the “verbally verified”. A massive hip hop song with impressive internal rhyming.

‘The Search (Radio)’ is a lovely song from start to finish. Beautiful from the live percussions, electric guitars, bass, drums to the sultry chorus by Jumar, who does really well again. DUGOD also drops a few nice bars on this. Classic tune!

‘Supply and Demand’ is OMG, Hip-Hop!!! Someone wake Tupac and Gangstarr up!! Reverbs, arresting kicks, samples (“uhn!!, muddaf***kers peep da game”) and of course heavy flows – “…his body is his spirit, his health/ & knowledge is the key to his riches, his wealth/….they wanna scare u with brands & big names/ the whole industry’s just trying to resist change /I spit games, uglier than Ving Rhames/… Respect for the art form, u niggas don’t show/y’all niggas shine but don’t glow…” I’ve just had to hold myself back from quoting the ENTIRE song. Jesse has enough “epistles... to heal cripples” and amaze healthy listeners. Just 8 bars into the joint and it was already my instant favorite.

‘High Life’ is arguably the best marriage of Hip hop and High life ever attempted. A Hip Hop head will love this one just as much as an Olisadebe or Victor Uwaifo lover would. It’s complete with the guitars, drums, horns, Rexx singing in an almost wailing voice and Jesse’s delicious flow. This song is the poster-child of the Nigerian disposition Jesse intends the album to embody. It starts off with a funny yet serious soliloquy in Igbo. This number is also one of my personal favorites of the album. Watching a live rendition of this song would give me exquisite pleasure.

‘Sunrise (shine on)’ has the feel of a late ‘90s action movie sound track. You’ll snap your fingers as you listen to Jesse spit “...still trying to get your ears, to listen with ur soul nigga/catch the flow quicker/….so Biggie, so Pac, and it’s so Jigga / … Shine on for the galaxy /we turnin’& we spinnin’ on wheel of Alchemy”. The song ends (as it started) with engaging Tony Montana (From the 1983 classic movie Scarface) sample that you would want to echo and give an approving nod to.

The mood on ‘The Case’ is laidback. The beat is so laidback it’s a boring listen. It takes nothing from the heaviness of the flow though- Topnotch. “SDC/ JagzNation??!! Mehn, what a pairing!”. Jesse features S.D.C, two of the finest emcees in the country, on this song but he still leads the pack. He was colossal on this reminding us that “he speaks the truth when u might believe in fables/ do u believe in angels/or fake names and labels” While singing “u running when no one is chasing you/...above me only God can judge me”. Ghost was angry on this song and Tec also dropped anvil bars too – “the ways of the sheep can never make sense to the lion…”

‘The Window’ made me look out my window. And no, not to wonder as Jesse asks on the song, but to look for the ‘mumu’ Rooster crowing in broad daylight--bizarre start to a nice song. Jumar’s singing laced with bongo drums, trumpets combines with Jesse’s rhymes to give the song an Amazon feel. Jesse also tried to maintain a particular rhyme (-air/-ere) all through but jettisoned it in the final verse (thank God, he was starting to get boring).

Another favorite, ‘How We Do’ is a befitting end to the entire album. Contains claps, kicks, flutes and a Tupac sample as powerful as a preacher’s sermon (brings Freestyle’s ‘Braggin’ Rights’ ft Blaise, back to mind). The hook is simple and encourages you to sing along. Jesse splatters amazing lyricism on this song, as usual- “and this how we learn to fly/...u’re d eagle, am d hawk with d raven’s eye/ …we taking off in the humid heat/ wing span’s about 300cubic feet/...what’s that thing coming down thru the stratosphere/ ...ur chest cavity & back just adapt just to air/ ...it’s so Retro/ Jagz wrote d memo/ whole albums can’t step to my Demo/…my flows tactical/ mathematical/ and practical too/ radical jew…” Phew!!!!!

His sophomore album, Jagz Nations Vol. 1: Thy Nation Come revealed Jesse’s depth as a Rapper but had too much ‘Selassie/reggae’ influence and hence divided opinions. Jagz Nation Vol.2: Royal Niger Company however is an exceptional expression of art and shows Jesse indeed as a prodigious musician who wants to make, and more importantly, share music from his heart without any restrain on his artistic direction. The album isn’t an appropriate soundtrack for our national life as Jesse hoped it would turn out. It doesn’t describe our collective challenges (corruption, greed, hypocrisy, Boko Haram etc) neither does it proffer solutions to them. It is however an excellent oeuvre and indeed “a testament to hard work and artistry”. I say it without any fear of contradiction-- this is one of the best Hip Hop albums out of Nigeria.

Considering all the “tungba-tungba” music currently rocking our airwaves, I can’t help but wonder- Will this obviously formidable work get the appeal it deserves? Is it marketable in Nigeria? Well, I’m afraid that once again only time will tell.
RATING 4.5 Stars!

Download some of the songs here:

http://www.hulkshare.com/notjustokweb/jesse-jagz-royal-niger-company-album

About the Author

The Writer, Cheyni (@itscheyniright) is a music enthusiast and writes from Abuja.

More Than Ever {video}

2014-02-21T16:01:00.002+01:00

Tweezy Tha Bohemian under the auspices of Shockwaves Entertainment presents to you the video of his hit single, "More Than Ever".
Watch out for this guy in 2014. he's coming with a fresh new sound to revolutionize the Naija music scene. #Gbam!
You can also view this song on Youtube here: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Sy_6YChyEQw

Download his hot new single, "If Only They Knew" on his CreativeNaija handle here: http://www.creativenaija.com/songs/if-only-they-knew
and download this video to your mobile phones here: http://www.creativenaija.com/project/more-ever-video

You can hook up with this talented artist on twitter @tha_tweezy

Wishing you a lovely weekend ahead!

We have moved!

2013-03-06T16:33:00.001+01:00

Hi!
Thanks for visiting. We ave finally moved to hour new ouse oh(He says in a heavy yoruba accent). Sheck hus hout at www.creativenaija.com

Creative. Original. Nigerian.

Roses and Arrows

2013-02-14T00:04:00.001+01:00

     Strangely enough, while the average person stereotypes the poet as someone who writes about love, I must confess that I have just a handful of those. Nonetheless, in commemoration of the season, I've exhumed one of such from the craters of my archives. I wrote this several years ago while listening to the 'Weekly top 40', a chart show hosted by the witty Rick Dees. That day, 'Lips of an Angel' by the American rock group, 'Hinder' was atop the chart. In Rick's usual fashion, he then proceeded to mention other songs over the years with references to the word 'angel' which had gone on to top US charts.
     What if I told you that you could win a thousand Naira recharge card of any network right now?! All you'd have to do is compile a list of these songs (one is hidden in each stanza of this piece), mention the artist that sang it, and the year it rocked the chart and send same to creativenaija@rocketmail.com
     Pretty cool huh? If not for the money, simply do it for the love! Cheers!

Roses and arrows

Eyes of an angel

smiling beautifully like diamonds

staring at me like I was under arrest

for refusing to fall in love.

How do I talk to this angel?

who has stolen all my senses

and tell her my love runs deeper than the distance

between heaven and hell.

Aren’t these the lips of an angel

like a true worthy messenger of cupid

spilling kisses on me

as quickly as bullets from a machine gun.

Undercover angel

sent to imprison my heart

in pure love

I love you, my angel

As you celebrate Valentine today, here is wishing you the strength to love not just on days like this, but everyday; not just in words but in deeds; not only when it's convenient but also when it hurts like hell; and not just to friends and family but also perfect strangers. Ciao!

Tha Watcha

Two Right Hands

2013-02-01T11:14:00.000+01:00

Two Right Hands

I wrote "Two right hands" sometime in February, 2005 under my nom de plume, Seyade Shobby. It is a novella where time proven wisdom is surreptitiously revealed through the experience of an 8 year old boy. This one begins with a dream. Or was it...

BANG!

Roy’s sprit, soul and body almost parted ways in fright. On

looking round the room though, he saw nothing. Or at least nothing

that was not there before. He then looked out through the window

and realized that all this while it had been raining. There were a lot

of thunders and lightening which explained the loud bangs.

Roy wiped the sweat off his forehead with his right hand. He

then tried to make himself more comfortable so he could continue

his sleep from where he left off. But he could not do so because no

sooner had he closed his eye before he heard two people arguing. It

was totally unlike his parents to argue aloud, and in any case, the

voices he heard certainly belonged to neither of them. He did not

expect Samson was talking to himself either and he was absolutely

convinced it was not the T.V because it was always switched off

before midnight.

Roy curved his left hands around his ear and turned it

towards the direction the noise seemed to have been coming from.

Something on his left hand brushed against his ear. It felt soft and

somewhat…alive. Roy raised his left hand to see it properly from

the little moonlight that was getting into his room. What he saw

nearly made him lose his mind. His left hand had eyes, ears and a

mouth of its own! Roy opened his mouth to scream but without his

control, his right hand swung up and completely covered his

mouth.

“Shut up! You are no longer a baby so what is scaring you

stiff?” Roy could not believe his eyes. His left hand had just

spoken to him in a very audible tone.

“Now back to where we stopped.” Roy’s right hand said. Roy

noticed that his right hand also had its own pair of eyes, nose ad a

tiny mouth in the center of its palm.

“By the way” His left hand started, “I’m Leslie”

“Leslie?” Roy asked utterly astonished. “Where on Earth did

you get the name?!!” He had no idea his hands had names of their

own.

“I gave myself the name of course! Or do you have a

problem with that lil’ boy?”

“No” Roy replied assertively. It was enough that every

member of his family saw him as a baby. It could only be worse if

his own hands had the same opinion.

“Good” Leslie said, “Now I won’t have to smack you silly”

Turning to face Roy, his right hand spoke “Oh, just call me Right”

“Right???!” Leslie interrupted before Roy could make a

statement.

“You see, that’s the problem I have with you. You always think

you are right. Somewhere in that little head of yours, you are the

perfect one, the flawless soul, the strongest…”

“And who says I am not. You?” Right asked.

“Yes. ME, Leslie. You are nothing but a pain in the ass and an

overenthusiastic laborer”

“What! How dare you?” Right said springing up from his

position beside Roy. He toppled onto Leslie and tried to smother

him. Roy was trying all he could but he really could not do much.

Both hands seemed to have gotten a life and will of their own and

he had little or no control over them.

“Will you two stop squabbling for one second and settle your

differences like civilized people?!” Roy shouted, startling both

hands that immediately let go of each other.

“Now, I want both of you to tell me what exactly the problem

is”

“It’s Right” Leslie was the first to speak. Turning suddenly to Roy,

he pointed his index finger at him and added, “And of course,

you.”

“Both of you have conspired to make me look inferior.”

“How” Roy asked.

“How? I’ll tell you how. While you give Right the dignified jobs to

do, you make me do all the dirty things like washing your smelling

butt when you finish using the toilet.”

“But…but” Roy stammered, “I really don’t see the difference

between what you do and what Right does.”

“What do you mean you don’t see the difference? Can you

compare cleaning your butt or picking up dirty things to getting a

warm handshake from Sandra?”

“Which Sandra?” Roy asked urgently

“How many Sandras seat beside you in class, Mr. Mama’s boy?”

“Oh, that Sandra. Anyway, she’s just a friend.”

“Whatever” Right interjected after a long silence. “I see you find

Caroline very pretty, Leslie” He said wriggling his wrist.

“It’s a pity you’ll never get to embrace lovely, lovely

Caroline,” He added, teasing Leslie.

“Hey, you guys are getting me confused here. I thought we were

talking about Sandra just now. Who the hell then is Caroline? I

sure don’t know any Caroline in my…

“Do we have to spell it out to you all the time, Captain

Dumb?” Of the two hands, Leslie obviously had the sharpest and

most insulting tongue.

“Caroline is Sandra’s right hand, ok?”

“Geez! You mean, you mean Sandra’s hands also have names of

their own?” Roy asked again. Leslie simply hissed then continued

his debate.

“Mind you, that’s not all. Right also gets to convey food into

your mouth, operate the remote control for the electronics, and

receive gifts from your father.”

“But all these are just due to tradition” Roy explained. “For

instance, it will be wrong to receive gifts from my dad with my left

hand, I mean you, Leslie.”

“Tradition my foot”

“Like you have one” Right cut in. “In any case, you are simply

jealous”

“Stop it. Don’t say such mean things.” Roy said

“As far as I am concerned, every single thing you get to do is more

of a responsibility than a privilege. After all, it might as well have

been the Leslie in your shoes and you in his. You were just lucky

to be the right hand.”

“Fancy you saying a thing like that” Leslie said, surprising

Roy that he appeared to be defending Right.

“Does the name Richard ring a bell to you?” Leslie asked

cunningly.

Roy thought for a second then realized what Leslie was trying to

say. It just occurred to him that this situation was an exact replica

of the scenario between him and Richard earlier in the day.

“Oh, I am so sorry. I promise to apologize to Richard first

thing in the morning.”

“Good” Right said with noncommittal.

“You guys seemed to have forgotten what we were taught at the

last Sunday school in church. We read from…em…”

“1 Corinthians 12:20 to the end.” Leslie said and before

anyone knew it, he started reciting the scripture verbatim.

“But now are there many members yet one body. And the eye

cannot say unto the hand, I have no need of thee, or the head to the

feet; I have no need of you. Nay much more those members of the

body which seem to be more feeble are necessary. And those

members of the body, which we think to be less honourable, upon

these we bestow more abundant honour and our uncomely

(unattractive) parts have more abundant comeliness. For our

comely parts have no need: but God hath tempered the body

together, having given more abundant honour to that part which

lacked. That there should be no Division in the body, but that

members should have the same care for another. And…”

“Alright” Roy interrupted to prevent Leslie from reciting the

whole chapter.

“Leslie, I never knew you had such a good memory. Maybe

you should be the one writing my tests for me.” He said.

“C’mon Roy, I too could have easily recited those verses

but…but” Right stuttered

“But what?” Leslie asked smiling.

“But for the fact that I had to flick through the Bible to locate the

chapter and also trace the words with my finger as the teacher read

it out”

“I expect you two to have learnt a lesson here. I myself never

really understood that sermon until today. This all goes to say hat

both of you are equally important to me and the different functions

you perform are equally necessary. For instance, if both you had to

feed me, then who would give me water to drink?”

When Roy noticed that they still did not seem totally

convinced, he added, “Right, can you remember the day dad’s

ceramic plate slipped from you?”

“Yes” Right answered soberly

If it weren’t for Leslie who caught it, it would have broken and

then I would be very cross with you.” Leslie’s face lit up when

Roy said this

So you see, there should be no more squabbling or

comparisons among you because as far as I am concerned, you are

both equal to me. Now hug yourselves to show me that you have

resolved your differences.” Leslie grabbed Right and gave him a

long, warm hug. Few minutes later, and they had all slept off.

Footnote: A hard copy of the full book can be ordered on www.lulu.com or you can search for it on google by searching for Two right hands by Seyade Shobby. If still unsuccessful, just send me a mail (laylow1388@yahoo.com) and I'd send the free e-book to you.

Don't forget, our official web portal (www.creativenaija.com) would be launching anytime soon. Y'all should watch out for that one. I do this 'cos I believe there's a giant on the insides of each and everyone of us. It's time to let yours out...

THE LAST LETTERS

2013-01-23T00:45:00.001+01:00

THE LAST LETTERS

To my son:

These things I write to you

Are the unspoken words which my father never said

But which I nevertheless heard

As clearly as the tinkle of a bell

In the dead of the night.

Whistle while you work

Love determinedly

Live by the book…

(The holy book…)

To my wife:

This picture I paint

Is abstract like the wind

Which we do not see

Yet feel,

The way I hope you felt

Every time I bought you a rose

Every time I went out of my way for you

Every time I got down on my knees to say how much I love you

Keep the home front when I’m gone

Continue to be loving kind and gracious

And know that though my heart now fails

My love for you never will…

To the world:

These notes I strum on my guitar

Are like a song which the robin cannot comprehend

But nonetheless bobs its head to

The way I hoped you did to my life.

I did not discover fire

But my heart burned with love for my dear ones.

I still haven’t been to the moon, and unfortunately never will

But do not infer that I did not live life to the fullest.

I dare say I did not change the world

All I tried to do was leave people better than I found them.

Isn’t it high time we stopped all these fighting and wars

Seeing that they’ve not helped things a bit?

Let us work together as one, as in the tower of Babel

Let us live in peace and unity

Long live humanity!

"Guy, how far? You want Pink Lips?"

2013-01-10T01:17:00.001+01:00

"Guy, how far? ...You want Pink Lips?"

Whoever said that it is the way you dress you would be addressed is a certified genius! And i got to find this out the hilarious way. It was about 12.45pm just yesterday when i happened to be walking down Awolowo way in Ikeja. I had on a striped Polo shirt, dark blue denim, sporty slips, really dark shades and my earphones on. In other words, I could easily pass for your everyday yuppy teenager with hip-hop in his ears and saw-dust in his head. Maybe that was why I didn't pass out in shock when this heavily built guy of about 6.1 with pierced ears, tight fitted tee and shorts walked up to me and asked me these very words:

"Guy, how far, you want pink lips?"

I immediately started to laugh hard. Like... real hard. I laughed so hard it seemed the world around me was whirling round and round in an insane bout of vertigo. Like seriously?! do guys really go all out to get pink lips and do people really pay for it?!

I was still bent over double in mirth when about 4 other guys in the vicinity rushed up to me, like i was some sort of finish line and asked me the same question. Suddenly the glee vanished. I realized there was nothing funny about this. These guys meant business! They wanted me to buy pink lips (or is fix the more appropriate word? Well, who knows these things). The first guy who accosted me suddenly added in two quick quips. "I dey also do tatoo and piercings"

I couldn't stop myself. I just had to know! "How much for pink lips?" To that, my good friend (who i later got to know goes by the name 'Wizzy') answered: "3K"

You know how you've heard of something, maybe even seen it with your own eyes, yet your mind doesn't register it to be true. Truth is that I've wondered with suspicion, when i watch some of these musical videos, what cataclysmic, chromosomal miscalculations of meiosis resulted in full grown black men having pink lips. But of course, I'd be the first to admit there is a whole lot i neither know nor understand. While in Camp Gidi (Lagos State NYSC camp), i was also somewhat piqued when i noticed how much energy guys these days were putting into looking good. I mean, i saw it all: permed hair, dyed side burns, tats, body piercings et cetera. Funy thing is i confess that Im one Christian with very liberal views on some issues. So im even all for a guy who does these things as part of his hustle. e.g a rapper, or someone in showbiz. For Pete's sake, Denrele definitely caught our attention with his high heeled shoes and eccentric dress sense, and now he's reeling in bucks. Yeah! more like it. If all these conscientious grooming was toward a measurable goal, I think it'd make a lot of sense. As a matter of fact, whenever people pose conundrums at me hinged on morality, I have a habit of telling them what Aristotle told people centuries ago:

"What ever makes you happy is good for you"

My hope however is usually that the introspective ones realise what the real questions are:

1. What really makes you happy.

2. Is this the sort of 'happy' that gives you moments of bliss and eons of misery?

Maybe we shouldn't delve too deeply into these philosophical musings. Let's keep off all that mental trouble to a more serious post. I after all intended this piece to be as happy-go-lucky as possible.

Personally ive also spoken jokingly to a couple of such guys hoping to get some insight into why they go all the way for that extra glitz. Believe me, if any of them had told me anything with the slightest shred of acumen, then maybe my fingers wouldn't be hurriedly moving over the keyboard of my 4 year old laptop this late in the night. I guess i'm hoping to get some form of education here on these issues.

I quickly collected 'Wizzy's no and promised to holler whenever i was in the neighbourhood. I get the feeling I would be seeing him soon for a more exclusive exposé. Maybe I'd even talk to some of the pink-lipped gentlemen in his studio and ask them what problem they had with God's own brand of make-up. As i turned to leave, Wizzy grabbed my hand and looked at me with desperation in his eyes. He told me to ask my friends something very important. I promised him i would. Almost swore to it even.

"Guy, how far? You want pink lips?"

Footnote: When Obama hear the thing sef, he wan laugh kill himself

Postscript: I had the intention to write this piece immediately i got back home as these words kept crawling around in my head like drunken scorpions from The Scorpion King, but was shattered with the news that the grim reaper had visited the household of a dear friend

And so I dedicate this post to the memory of Tomiwa Bojuwoye, and Anna- the daughter we never got to know. May their blessed souls rest in piece and may the good Lord grant my friend, Femi, the fortitude to bear this great loss. Amen.

The Beautiful Journey

2013-01-02T22:57:00.001+01:00

There is a painting whose possession Ive held for the past 4 years. I had it with me in my last three years in College, brought it down to Lagos when i started my internship in Lagos State University Teaching Hospital, and when i finished and needed to vacate my room there, it was one of the very few things i brought back home. Sometime in the distant future, when you sit down to try to reflect on what the heck i was trying to say in this paragraph, I'd love you to remember one thing only- That I truly love this particular canvas. So now that we've established that one fact, let me go on to describe another painting-

the one i did not buy.

Exactly... the actual painting i should have had all along! Perhaps, if i started from the beginning, you'd understand this random rumblings of mine. So that's where I'd begin. Where all good stories should begin anyway.

The Beginning.

After 3 years of Med school. I concluded I had had enough! Chill... I don't mean of wanting to be a doctor, but rather of living in the hostel. Seriously. I couldn't take it any longer. For goodness sake, i spent 6 years in F.G.C.L (Ijay) living in the hostel. with its insecurities, decrepit social amenities, and pseudo-jungle habitation. After that, i was bundled in one mushroom like room or another for another 3 years in Unilorin and had to live with other people- an assortment of personal idiosyncracies, everybody with their own unique brand of madness- from time to time. Truth is, till date, nostalgic feelings of shared experiences flood my mind from all the camaraderie Ive been blessed with in the course of these co-habitations, but sometime at the start of my Clinical Postings, I felt i needed my own space so i got a room of my own off campus. One of the very first fantasies i had to fulfill was a need to own an artwork i could put in my own space.

Enter Post Office, Ilorin, Kwara State.

The fact that town planners (Or whoever the hell it is that names streets) couldn't even spend time to give this place a name of its own, but rather just looked round and called the area by the name of the first structure they could see- gives you an impression that Post Office is not your every day posh neighborhood. By extension, i wasn't out to get a painting by Van Gogh. In any case, I couldn't exactly afford any of these over priced works. At least, not yet. So i worked up to the first stall where art works were sold. That was where it caught my eye.

It was a water color piece. About 2.5 feet tall and 3 feet wide. It was a landscape painting i almost swore had been drawn with the colors of the rainbows themselves! It depicted a sea side with birds, and trees, and tower houses and clear blue skies-each competing in cheerful colours, and depths of beauty as far as the eyes could see. It was like no matter how breathtaking the immediate scene was, each time i peered deeper into the landscape, i found out the scene that unfolded was even more awe- inspiring than what currently held my gaze. A sudden epiphany gripped my frontal lobes like a hungry baby, its mother's breasts. I realized that no matter how rosy things were, there was always the possibility that the future held even greater and brighter promises for me, and that i could never afford to be complacent in life but rather keep on forging ahead, gracefully, hopefully...
That was the day i wrote this. For me, life is definitely a beautiful journey...

The beautiful journey

A time not too far away

Is where I want to be

It is as beautiful as it is obscure

Yet my soul longs for it

Like an eagle for the skies.

Though I stand in pseudo-paradise

I clear my mind of lazy haze

Lest complacency becomes my lot

And I dwell in this place for ever.

I pick myself up forcefully

From my bed of beautiful

And trudge relentlessly

Towards a place that’s more beautiful

To a land that is pretty and fair

Where ravens of fortune shall bear me up

And springs of peace soothe my soul.

Someday when I get there

I’ll rest awhile

Before picking my mind up

Once again,

To begin a journey

Towards the land that’s yet prettier and clearer

Not too far away…

So the question beckons. Why didn't i pick up that painting, but rather chose the one next to it. Equally beautiful, just a notch less inspiring. This one was also a seaside painting, of a ship that had just left the shores. A Little bird looked on forlorn as this ship set sail. Like a close friend had just begun his own journey into life- something which one way or the other, you finally realize is a personal experience, no matter the size of your family...or your heart. There was a calm look of acceptance on its face as it dawned on it that it was time for it to begin its own beautiful journey... alone.

Still, the question begs for an answer. Why this canvas and not the other? Maybe it was because, in some cynical parts of my soul, i feared this was closer to home than the other. It was like this one looked more realistic. More pragmatic... but beautiful nonetheless. Some other parts wrestle with this, and argue that this is just one of those decisions you make but are never quite sure why. But this two dissenting voices in my head are clear on one thing- that the life we've been graciously given was made to be a beautiful one.

As you set sail into this new year, here is wishing that you don't fall short of the great expectations the good Lord had when he made you.

HAPPY NEW YEAR!

Christmas Eve

2012-12-25T00:23:00.003+01:00

I wrote this one on the 8th of Dec. 8 Christmases ago when i stumbled on a song by Celine Dion of the same title. In the spirit of the season, Ive dug it out of my archives and decided to share.

Merry Christmas to you!!!

Christmas Eve

It was the day before the angels celebrated

but it was not on the 24^th

It was that instance when I saw Jesus

the moment salvation I got

It was the hour before my second birth

when he wiped away my tears

it was the minute before he placed me over death

and rolled away my fears.

It was the month before all things seemed beautiful

but must I say it was not November?

It was the tick before the doctor came out

and joint me in shouting halleluyah

because the tests which yesterday revealed a tumour

from today I’ll see no more

hence that monster that always made me scream

has become just another bad dream.

It was the day before Christmas

yeah right, it damn wasn’t 24^th

it was that split second before I saw you

the moment your eye I caught

Just like Jesus Christ came to the world

your appeared to set me free

that’s why I refer to that day as Christmas Eve

the second before you were born to me.

Album review: Olamide – YBNL

2012-12-18T16:44:00.003+01:00

Album review: Olamide – YBNL (YAHOO BOY NO LAPTOP)

Interestingly, Olamide did not forget the exact route that led him to the current stardom he is enjoying, following the same concept as his debut; Rapsodi on his sophomore album YBNL. In the features he’s had earlier this year, he displayed a diverse energy on songs with the introduction of drastic aggressiveness in his delivery. Despite the fact that he seems to be concentrated on the amount of cash flow and number of shows call-up he is earning, YBNL is a subtle pointer to the fact that he’s not really paying attention to what ought to be revitalising at this point in his career: His lyrical prowess.

The album kicks-off on a nice note with a nicely synchronised Wale’ Ambition on Money giving a lucid explanation of his daily routine as a hustler on the street which some what sounds like a skit, nevertheless it was enough to provide an apposite transmission to the laid back brag-infused fucking with the devil where he rapped with a Reminisce alter-ego.

Olamide continued with his alter-ego sampling this time around with a lively delivery. The various imageries he tried portraying on the Buckwylla assisted lights in the air were all elementary as they virtually seemed too be grandiose compared to it’s intended meaning. Buckwylla on the other hand had an energetic verse and hook, handling both with utmost dexterity giving it a pleasant reggae feel.

While he continued to tell stories on street love, owotabua picture, and the anthemic jale, they are all a variations on a theme, besides some guest on the YBNL maintained a guest status all through, while some others acted like they were the host. The likes of Davido and Tiwa Savage were really not at their best, Kay Switch brought life to the tape when everything seems to be monotonous bringing a dance hall vigour to Remember.

He outwitted himself on ewo idi were he chose to sing and rap, while a little production error on Fuji House which had Dammy Krane doing the same thing he did on Overdose’ I Like Your Way ruined what would have turned a very nice party rocker, though the combination of strings and other elements were all okay, but the ineffective bass line destabilized the song.

Teaming with controversial rapper, Reminisce and Baseone on industreet has him dragged into the protracted Reminisce-Vector on-going beef. He brought out the beast in himself as well as in the other two, but not without stepping on the toes of Vector.

Perchance the only thing that changed in him aftermath Rapsodi is the aggressiveness and a little compromise in his lyrics. Avid listeners probably might have noticed those changes as it added cohesion into a basically attenuated style he started with, even though he didn’t completely exploit it to the optimum despite having a lethal track arrangement.

“they call me five star general/hustler I’m martian/emi oun form diva/ shey mojo Kim Kardashian/gogbo show ti mo ti lo I killed ‘em with passion/” – “it is well I got back up plan/galagala/in the name of the father, son and of the holy spirit/omo oro legbe church/I pray to God that I make it to heaven for going through hell/ let my success shame the devil” –Jesu O Kola

DOWNLOAD LIGHTS IN THE AIR

DOWNLOAD STREET LOVE

Thots (tha wordsmith)

Tha Watcha

"As E dey Go" by Tweezy (Tha Bohemian)

2012-12-07T19:54:00.000+01:00

"As E dey Go" by Tweezy (Tha Bohemian)

      Guess what Gospel (Producer of Davido's 'All of you') said to Tweezy after they worked on 'As E dey go'?
      He said "Hope you realise you've just recorded a hit?"
     After listening to the song about a hundred times back to back on receiving it, I'm under the astute impression that Gospel is a really sincere guy.
     From the stables of Shockwaves Entertainment, 'As e dey go' is Tweezy's second official single, sequel to 'More than ever' which blew up the blogosphere with mad and exciting reviews (Word has it that the video to that song is already in post production). 'As e dey go' is a harmonious merger between simple but tasteful lyrics by a singer who i daresay knows his craft, a quick-tempo, feel good beat, and the awesome production skills of one of the finest in the game. Ladies and gents; Please brace yourself...It is clear we've got another classic on our hands!

To read Tweezy's complete bio, please follow this link:

Introducing Tweezy (Tha Bohemian)

To download his new hit single, 'As e dey go', please follow this link:

'As E dey Go' by Tweezy

Thanks!

To drop comments below, click on 'Name/ Url' or 'anonymous' if you don't have any of the requested accounts but please place ur name in the body of your comment. Thanks.

FLOWERS FOR YOU by Segun 'Owcee' Israel

2012-12-03T21:04:00.002+01:00

Before we rummage into this piece proper and swing by its poetic tendrils as real literati should, i think it might interest you to know how i came about this poem, or more aptly, writer. It might surprise you to know that Segun was my bunkie some 10 - 12 years ago in Federal Government College Lagos. He sent me a Facebook message a couple of months back asking if i remember the poem i wrote for him while we were just some bloody Jajarians in check blue shirts and brown Nylon trousers. Paranoid homophobics, keep calm. God forbid that i should write a love poem for a 3 legged creature like myself. If i remember correctly, there was this chick he was trying to 'toast' and he felt a poem might just do the trick.
Naturally, i immediately asked him to send me some lines from the poem if he still had it. surprisingly, he did. When i read it i thought to myself: Hmm..Not bad, for 14 year old me. He quickly went on to add that he has done some closet writing over the years himself but wasnt even sure what to do with them. Naturally, the opportunist in me wouldn't let such info just ride on by into the sunset. After much mental arm-twisting, i finally got this one out of him. This one is strictly for the ladies... Muaah!

FLOWERS FOR YOU by Segun 'Owcee' Israel
once,
these roses stood alone
in faraway lands.
Lonelier than us who think we're alone,yet filled with pride.
Their beauty springs as day with no witnesses around.
I have come a long way,
back to the place i call home,
the place where you are.
I do not have much to give
but i have come with these flowers,
and with the crafts i have learnt in this long coming
i have woven a basket with the daffodils, hycinths and shamrocks of many lands.
I have bounded the roses with stripes of gold
and laid them in the little basket,
and in my weaker arm i stretch out the posy
as a fraction of my heart.
Please home if you're still coming home,
come now, come at once
Lest these flowers wither,
lest my body hungers further
for the warm embrace of ur breasts.

Shout-out to everyone else who's ever jotted down a creative line or two. Isn't it time someone other than your diary read your works? It just might surprise you how good it really is, and who knows where things would go from there. Please feel free to send same to laylow1388@yahoo.com to get published on this blog and showcased to the world.
I do this 'cos i believe there is a giant on the insides of each of us. It's high time you let yours out...

Album Review: D’Prince – Frenzy

2012-11-28T01:09:00.000+01:00

Album Review: D’Prince – Frenzy

In some recesses of D’Prince’s mind, I bet all praise and adoration goes to Don Jazzy as far as his musical career is concerned. Nonetheless, I maintain that their relationship is a symbiotic one as the hit single ‘Omoba’ didn’t hurt their financial coffers at all!

Don Baba J definitely brought his A-game to the table of Frenzy, the long over-due debut of this Mavin stalwart who we cannot help but remember to have started off as a rapper. Da Prince does a good enough job with his singing- perhaps, he’s not your typical vocalist, but truth be told, who listens to the high notes these days? All the people seem to want is to be entertained! Regardless of becoming famous for his sub par rhymes on songs like; wad up, Ooze, molowo and omoba, he had no qualms repeating those same calibre of lines on Frenzy on occasions where he tried rapping, but the fact that producers such as: Spellz, Baby Fresh and Josh Beats enlisted on this project helped to mask those shortcomings. The inspirational Journey of a Thousand Miles had Wande Coal delivering a very sonorous and memorable hook with Don Jazzy providing an adequate back up vocal to an already energetic song where listeners were encouraged to never give up on their dreams. Another good one was ‘Bad girls’

Undoubtedly the album started on a promising note with his focus on the afro pop genre. Getting the party started comes easily with Goody Bag while the Dr Sid assisted Amina maintains the tempo already earmarked by the former.

The comfort he showed while singing is glaring on tracks like: the standout Africa Zumba, believe, and call police which continue with the party trends already laid from the start. He was left at a crossroad which left him in a conundrum on whether to completely rap or sing somewhere along the line.

These contributed to his shortcomings on Real G which has him spitting trademarked dope rhymes that lack depth as well as being to be too soft to satiate the deep yearnings of the real hip hop heads. Although they are primarily not his target audience, the fact that MI was at his all time worse also tarnished the song. Painting the town red saw him doing the wrong thing at the right time as he delivered a lethargic hook. He tried to recover on his verses, but in the end it was Wizkid that brought the song to life. Makes you wonder if it was a wise choice doing that collabo in the first place as no one really loves to be out-shined.

A genuine mainstream album with much concentration on entertaining audiences, Frenzy did not fall flat on this with its efficient blend of contemporary African music with Pop. However, the fact that it made mockery of the rap genre on songs like: Overdose and Jonzing, Shower, and No more sleeping on ‘em and Wiz kid also not helping matters in what looks like an improvised delivery, might raise listeners eyebrows against Omoba’s song writing skills.

“Night would come, but day must break/ nobody above mistake/ see for this life na give and take/that’s why I’m grateful for every breathe I take/you don’t have to be told wetin you go do/you just got to decode wetin you go do/don’t be waiting to be told/ there’s a story to be told”.

Arguably, this 21 tracker is a bit too lengthy and some of the songs weren't worthy to make it there in the first place. If all you're after is mainstream entertainment, then you'd most likely love Frenzy, but if you're a sucker for artistic ingenuity and intellectual depth, i'm afraid you might not find that here. Better still, form your opinions by listening to some of the tracks. Please download below.
Ciao!

Download Goody Bag

Download Real G

As always, these are just our own humble views on the matter, let the world know what you feel by dropping comments below. Thanks!

MY OWN

2012-11-04T09:58:00.001+01:00

MY OWN

My pain is my own

I know it intimately

It is with me all day

like a member of my body.

The world smiles at me in desperate oblivion

I, too, a weak smile must now return

“Let sleeping dogs lie” I say

because at the end of the day

it is an unwritten agreement

that my pain after all, is my own

and I must know it intimately

My dreams are my own

that I struggle hard to achieve

I’m in my head all day

scheming, strategizing…

Everybody looks at me in scornful derision

“Me and my castles in the air”, they say

Well, when it’s all been said and done

like it applies to everyone

my dreams after all, are my own

that I struggle hard to achieve.

Withered Orchid

2012-10-30T22:53:00.000+01:00

It's funny i once won a writing competition back in College for writing a piece i titled 'When less is more' (http://thawatcha.blogspot.com/2012/01/when-less-is-more.html) but when i read this beautiful piece, dredged up from the frontal lobes of the enigmatic David 'Davinici Da Bohemian' Iruoje, i got even deeper insights into that school of thought. This is not the type you gloss over hurriedly. Let the words sink in, syllable by syllable. Each conjuring emotions so strong, so heartfelt, you sometimes need to close your eyes so it touches the right spot. Take this one like the physician's potions...dose by dose...

Withered Orchid

"...and then she died".

She always loved eye-shadows of different shades. I used to find them gaudy. She wore a different colour every other day.

"D, what do you think of my..." "...whatever", I would retort, "we are already late for the outing".

That was five years ago in Kaduna. I remember walking along Kano road, Kasua when an old man offered me an odd looking albeit beautiful plant. "They bring good luck, but they do not last long" he said to me in hausa. I ignored the man and his plant.

She took ill one day and began to fade. The moment I set my eyes on her, I knew. Intuitively, I knew. The doctors gave me a medical treatise on her illness. "she is responding, isn't she looking healthier today?". Empty tests and meds. Bottom line; her illness confounded them. A month at most, they deduced. But she endured three months.

She always wore those eyeshadows even then. She lost her power for speech, but I could see the pain emblazoned in her eyes. I was broken. I was with her one of those days, looking at her weak form when I noticed the eyeshadow. It was Jade-green. "beautiful", I thought aloud. There was a queer look in her eyes, and then she smiled weakly. She handed me an envelope from under her pillow. A small note. "hey D, I'm glad you like them, I have been 'dying' to hear you say they are beautiful. Love, Jessy". I smiled sadly, I think I laughed, laughed at the grim humour, and I wept because I understood...>

....And then she died.

That evening, it was a friday, April 7. I have always wondered how the dead manage to look so timeless in death, but she was better, you never saw a more beautiful corpse. The day she was buried, the heavens wept. I walked away from the graveside like a drugged idiot. Someone was speaking to me, "did you see, the corpse?, I've never seen eyeshadows more beautiful on the living".

I looked up at the grey sky and said "yes, they are indeed beautiful..."

Please drop comments below by clicking on the 'post a comment' button. Tell us your take on this piece, we'd seriously love to hear from you! If you don't have a gmail/google account, just scroll down and click on 'anonymous' or 'name/url' and input your name where requested.

Perhaps you're also something of an underground wordsmith yourself and feel like coming out of the closet, well, no better place to start than on this blog. just send in your write-ups to laylow1388@yahoo.com Connect with 'tha watcha' on Facebook by clicking on the 'like' button to the right of this post.

Thanks and God bless!

Tha Watcha.

Mix tape Review; Boogey – ART-ificial Intelligence

2012-10-25T22:43:00.002+01:00

Mix tape Review; Boogey – ART-ificial Intelligence

Unlike Rick Ross on a duet with Andre 3000 where both of them completely ran amok with viral individual opinions on why orthodox sixteen bars tradition wasn’t enough to completely let out their minds, and thus extended the song to an unusual duration of eight minutes! For Boogey, an eight-bars opportunity on Illegal Music II sufficed for him to capture the fans’ attention.

Perhaps the most pronounced up and coming rapper at the moment, Boogey was on other notable mix-tapes and singles including: Tha Rapman’s World Domination II, Mode Nine’s Occupy the Throne and AQ’s Machine Gun Flow. While these achievements might look like he has inadvertently raised the bar too high for himself, regardless he never failed to deliver when called upon. Very crisp and complex, the mix tape “Art-ificial Intelligence”, comprises of a frank aggressive rap coupled with humorous wordplays and nimble delivery along with an introspective storytelling.

Art-ificial Intelligence maintained the aggressive and fast pace delivery style of Boogey which elucidates the promptness of Mr. Brain to capture the industry with the a self-appraisal narrative on “The Fifth Horseman” to the gruffly titled “Arrogance” which lacks the cohesion intended on it. On the other hand “I Killed ‘em”, a rendition of Kendrick Lamar’s Rigor Mortis, being the supposed anti-thesis of the Ray X produced “Arrogance” illustrates the violence inciting rhymes of Boogey with lines such as:

“I’m Jason without the mask/I’m taking ‘em out, they’re trash/I’m dangerous to the people/my place is Alcatraz/I’m an alien saucer from space that’s about to crash/I’m stack of hay you set ablaze in a house of wax”.

He found his sense of humour on “Judge Me” with a novel and descriptive storytelling making unrestricted transitional flows with a Damilola complemented hook as well as the sarcastic “I’m Wack”. Somehow, he managed to manoeuvre away from unnecessary disorderly bars with a metaphorical flow and fused semi-conscious narration on “Listen”.

“major skills but majority will never (listen)/I’m bringing back the classic getting niggas reminiscent/the kids emulating what they see on television/and nobody missing reality even when it’s missing/the youth runaway from truth to convenience”.

The numerous biblical and movie references on Art-ificial Intelligence made it a multi-dimensional effort with samples from; Small Ville XV, and Matrix, and various bars referring to scenes of movies such as:

“I’m quicker than a mixture of quick draw Mcgraw and Sonic/I wish y’all would call it fronting/last warning/I’m transforming/dodging silver bullets”.

The skill with which he executed this project might help him build a long standing career, the fact that he is gradually becoming an omnipresent rapper with numerous appearances and pseudo-appearances on songs to his credit is a remarkable achievement for him such that Naija hip hop heads are already wondering:

‘Is he the next big thing to happen to hip hop in Nigeria?’

Well… for that, we’d have to wait for the famous tattler, Mr Time, ‘cos once more,

“Only time will tell’.

DOWNLOAD SONGS

Thots tha Wordsmith

Tha Watcha

Kiki's poem: "Nigeria"

2012-10-21T13:45:00.001+01:00

This piece was sent in by Kiki Ope Buraimoh, a 15 year old lad who is currently an SS1 student of Tender Touch Secondary School, Festac, Lagos. Thought-provoking and birthed from pent up anger, this is Nigeria in the eyes of one more angry teenager...

Nigeria

Nigeria the country of unease
Where people are suffering all around like cows and geese
I wonder when it would start to ponder
But I guess Gods voice is as strong as thunder
Everything involves politics nd embezzlement
When we should be focusing on d country's improvement
Nigeria my country blessed with resources
But even the hospitals have no nurses
High prostitution and much crime rates
That even armed robbers are now head of states
Nigeria my country the country with gold
I just called Jonathan and he kept me on hold
Nigeria my country blessed with resources
Boko haram every where even in the churches
Bad politicians and bad presidents
Pilling up big big monies in their own residents
When I grow up I wana be the one
To lead my country forward and see what we become
Bad electricity and even bore hole
God judge them for what they stole

Kiki-ope Buraimoh

Footnote: Hope you liked it. If you also have something you've written, sung, or any other creative work you'd like to showcase, please feel free to send same to laylow1388@yahoo.com to be published on this blog. To drop comments, if you don't have any of the requested accounts, scroll to the bottom of the drop down menu to post comment as either 'anonymous' or name/url and include your name in the post.

I do this cos' i believe there is a giant on the insides of each of us.....it's time to let yours out.

Mixtape Review; TeeKlef – NoBeatIsSafe (NOBIS)

2012-10-16T00:01:00.003+01:00

Mixtape Review; TeeKlef – NoBeatIsSafe (NOBIS)

For an upcoming artist, versatility would not only be a massive boost to his career, but night even be the springboard that sets him/her off to the stars. TeeKlef whose real name is Ebuka Unogu and signed to his own record label definitely doesn’t have this in short supply. In 2011, he burst into the airwaves when he came second finalist in the famed enigma competition organized for upcoming rappers by the then Mo hits boss, Don Jazzy where he brandished his singing and rapping ability.

His latest effort ‘NOBIS’ is a body of work that featured few posse-cuts, massive sound reproduction and concentrated versatility. He made the beats his own, capitalizing on these to satiate the numerous yearnings of listeners craving for Rnb and rap.

Perhaps the creative intentions on this work led to indecisiveness in some cases whereby he seemed somewhat torn between singing and rapping leading to the unnecessary prolongation of songs such as: “En route | For Me”.

“… they never see it/ they never see me see it/ but when it all come together/ that is when they start to see it.”

The “NoBis” has a quite self-explanatory concept, but Klef limited himself to it without any digression and continued the trend on a two-in-one “Wassup” where he sampled Lil’ Wayne’s mirror on the second, taking his lines majestically on the first with a high powered vocal performance on the second;

“for real niggas y’all messing with a real nigga, the real nigga recognize he’s a real nigga, am talking triple OG kinda trill nigga, so when we murder collabos they say we kill niggas”?

Just like every other rap mix tape and CDs, “NOBIS” didn’t seem to lose its brag code with numerous catchy personal appraisal lines on; “1000 grammys”, “The One”, “wassup | mirror’’ and the vastly relationship-inclined songs like; all over your body, don’t runaway, my art, and should’ve known better, all acknowledge his abilities in both singing and rapping which might presumably be hard for him to ferret out which one he does better.

The piece de resistance of this 17 tracked tape is the wit, versatility and dedication with which it was executed especially being an upcoming act. Irrespective of these, the fact that he stayed far too much on the safe side of “No Beat Is Safe” affected his adaptability as he failed to tour other genres taking too much care with a rakish tempo except on; “don’t run away” where he worked with a more Nigerian sound.

Download 'Enroute' by Teeklef

Remember though, that these are just our own views, we'd love to hear what you think. Feel free to drop comments below by clicking on 'post a comment'. If you don't have a gmail account (google account0 or any of the other requested profiles, just click on 'name/url' or 'anonymous' to comment as such but please remember to leave your name at the bottom of each comment. Kindly click on the facebook like button on the right sidebar of this site to connect with tha watcha on Fb and follow on twitter at twitter.com/laylow1388. You can also register on this blog via you facebook account by clicking on the 'Register' tab at the bottom of this site. Thanks. You totally rock!

FOR ALL IT'S WORTH!

2012-10-10T23:43:00.000+01:00

This was the entry that came first in the just concluded writing competition, 'Tha Watcha's Pen Principal' organised on this blog. Follow this link to get an overview of the winning entries:

All Hail the Winners!!!

This piece was sent in by Ashraff Abdulhakeem, a fresh medical graduate from the University of Ilorin. Witty and thought provoking, it is reflective of hope despite despair, joy despite desolation and optimism in the face of imminent gloom. It goes thus:

FOR ALL IT'S WORTH!

With lighted candles,
Arranged in circles,
And faces abound,
A wish they demanded.
Like a de javu, it came rushing to me.
"I have being here before."
As it were, I remembered.
Wishes I made,
Wishes I prayed and hoped for.
But wishes that never came to light.
Then my fallible soul indulged my conscience,
So it screamed,
"my head my mind,
Whichever is in charge,
I need my strenght,
To thread the mile.
My eyes my sight,
The gaze I see,
The journey I dare,
I hope to bare.
My legs my limbs,
Fatigued you may,
My plea I give,
Endure you should.
The fear I dread,
The yard I seek,
To quench my thirst,
For all it's worth."
And then my thoughts came aloud.
"AMEN!"
then my friends said
"happy birthday"
And I let out a smile,
For all its worth!.

Its been lots of fun going through the individual entries as they were each special in their own rights. But of course there could only have been three winnners. Nervertheless, over the next few weeks, I'd post some of the other entries which didn't make it to the top three.
I feel obliged to mention in passing my slight disappointment that despite the entreaties that whoever won the credit which i placed at the bottom of each of the winning entries posted should acknowledge it, no one did. That wasn't really cool. This is hoping that subsequent editions of this writing competition would be bigger with more attractive cash prizes especially when we launch our own domain name.

From the good folks of www.thawatcha.blogspot.com , thanks for following us on this journey, and oh; lest i forget: 4705334455164610
Please acknowledge receipt via the medium u got this link,
*sighs in despair*
Well, for all its worth...