Life of Debt

Coupons Finally!

2011-09-11T07:40:00.001-07:00

It has been WEEKS lately where my local Sunday paper has not had coupons, for the past 3 weeks nothing. But today finally coupons, Yeah. My coupon case has become very light so I'm looking forward to coupon cutting today.

Cooking the Debt Away

2011-09-08T16:30:00.001-07:00

Ok here I am once again trying to save money through the families food budget. So again no eating out, so far so good, but with getting used to the new school schedule it seems harder than before.

DH just called asking what to bring home for dinner, he knows we have cut out the eating out. Guess old habits are hard to break but I really need him to try a little harder or maybe I need to try harder to not be so frustrated with.

Dinner last night was flank steak so tonight is chicken with a tandoori sauce. Night before last was grilled jerked chicken. Trying to Kees the meals switched up so husband does not get board with having the same meat each night, hope I can keep the cooking juices flowing. Any ideals?

Debt Ups and Downs

2011-09-08T09:10:00.000-07:00

So far this week has been good for debt ups and down, lets see the goods:

DH has not charged anything this week (I'm impressed)
Both cars still running
DD decided she did not want to order team photos (really she forgot about it)
No ordering out
I did not give in to any labor day sales; this is usually when I get a few pieces to round out my work wardrobe for the year

Now for the bad:

Still purchasing school supplies, cost another $44.
DD who is learning how to drive, drove over glass with my brand new tires (today) but so far it looks ok.
Need to write checks totaling $145 for school (this is public schools)
Refrigerator still not working properly since Hurricane Irene and our extended warranty is up.

Guess you can only control what you can and work with the rest.

Debt so bad I'm lost

2011-09-03T10:03:00.000-07:00

My family's debt is so bad and I don't know what to do. Tried everything I could think of but we can't seem to make any headway. That is not totally true, we make headway but we loose it 3x faster then we make it. And I am pretty sure the main culprit is my dear husband, he is AWFUL with money. We both believed that if I took over the bill paying (after years of arguing) it would fix the problem. That was a big joke, instead of fixing the problems it seems to have just delayed the downfall and removed my husband from the reality of it and increased my stress so much that my some times tick has turned into an all the time tick. At the same time I am no angel, since my husband seems unable to curb his spending I have been spending a little more than I need. Getting super depressed again, will write more later....Happy savings

It's Been a long time

2011-09-02T10:00:00.000-07:00

But I'm back. It has been over a year and every time I thought we were making progress in a few months we were worse then before. I took over the bill paying a little over a year ago, for a while we did ok. Even started a savings account, we got up to nearly $3,000. Well all good things must come to an end over the past 3 months I have had to deep into the savings to cover the monthly bills and I can't tell why.

That is not totally the truth, one month we had to make some car repairs about $600. Over all it seems to be a lot of little things and I feel like I have lost an uphill battle that has finally rolled down hill and can't get up.

This is so depressing, I will write more later, I promise right now I need a hot cup of tea.

Update Debt Elimination - November 2009

2009-12-12T18:15:00.001-08:00

Hi everyone, Hope you are having a wonderful time getting ready for the holidays and staying out of debt! It has been a crazy few weeks for me at work and I have missed blogging. It feels good to be back at the keys, typing away.

This is my day of truth, where I call all the credit card companys and get the current balances. November was a crazy credit card month, one of the cards lowered our credit limit, even though we have never been late on a payment and have been paying the balance down, it was on a card that daycare charges automatically each month. When the credit card company lowered the balance the daycare payment bounced. Very embarrassing and more then a little depressing. Hopefully 2010 will be a better year economically, I have high hopes.

Credit Card Balance
Start point = $95,351
Last month = $89,518
Current = $86,222

Paying off $5800 of debt - Was it a fluke?

2009-11-22T10:34:00.000-08:00

Lat month (October) we paid off $5833 worth of debt, I have been wondering how much of that was a fluke or one time event.

We had big plans for October, all of which did not pan out. The biggest plan was I was taking over the bill paying. This darn near caused a war, my husband felt that I was blaming him and saying that he was not capable of managing a budget. I swear I never said that but I am pretty sure I was thinking it. We have been married well over a dozen years so I do have some ideal how he thinks and the last thing I want to do is make the situation any more tense or ugly. So I have been very careful not to lay blame and to place blame on myself. But still my husband felt the way he felt, personally I think it was /is his own gilt and I can say that here since he is not aware of this blog.

After determining that divorce is not what we want we have come to an unstable payment plan. My husband still pays the bills and I check credit card balances and the bank account on a regular bases (2x a month) to make sure we are on target. The good side of this plan is that he retains some of his manhood (I guess) and all the budget and bill pressure is not on me. The bad side of this plan is that we could pay the credit card debt off a lot faster if I did it but it would damage the relationship even more.

For last month we got paid back about $3000 on a loan we made to a family member, we gave it expecting to never be paid back so this was a great surprise. All of that went to paying off the remaining balance on the credit card we use on a regular basis. Now that card is paid in full and will be paid off each month. We also get points on the card so it is the only one we are using at this time. The other credit cards have been put up and others shredded. One was closed when the credit card company wanted to increase our interest rate not because we had done something but because the "economy was bad" From about 12% to over 20%, I declined and they closed the account. No problem , decided that credit rating hit I would take.

October was the first month that we did allowances, $150 each for the month. I would like to include more things in that allowance like hair cuts but marriage is give and take and the things that caused the major drain on the finances like eating out is included. We have bee cooking at home more, by we I mean me. This took some getting use to but is turning into a nice experience, cooking new things and trying different recipes.

We are also working on planning out our purchases. Still need a LOT of help in this area, but this is what checks and balances is for. I am hopeful at the very least if it doesn't work there will be lest debt to split up if we split up.

An interesting article

2009-11-16T08:04:00.000-08:00

Here is an interesting article on debt negotiation written by fellow blogger David Nikson:

Debt negotiation: A useful technique to come out of debt

Debt negotiation is one of the popular techniques to become debt free. The reason why it has become so popular is that it assures that you can pay a lower amount than what you actually owe. Debt negotiation is also known as debt settlement.

How professional debt negotiation helps you

When you contact a debt negotiation professional to assist you with settlement, you no longer make payments to your creditors; the company you deal with is expected to do it for you. You just have to make a single monthly payment to the debt settlement company and this money is deposited into a trust account. When a debt settlement is decided on, the settlement company collects the money from the trust account for paying off all your creditors.

Under debt settlement, you have to inform your creditors that you're directing your payments to the settlement company. The debt settlement professional talks to your creditors to accept an amount to close the account and term it as "settled". This suggests that the creditor does not receive any payment throughout the procedure. However, you must remember that debt settlement docks your credit score. If you have several creditors, it would be docked again and again. Debt settlement would spoil your credit score to such an extent that it might require 6-12 months to rebuild the score.

Why debt settlement is accepted by creditors

Creditors, particularly credit card companies would agree to debt settlement since they have already profited from you. If you have huge credit card balances and just have been paying the minimum for quite a number of years, or only some extra, then the credit card company probably recovered the whole amount borrowed along with interest. This indicates that the company is not truly suffering a loss when it enters into a debt settlement contract. But debt settlement permits the company to at least get some money, which they would not receive if you file bankruptcy.

Self-help debt negotiation

You can negotiate debt on your own. Nevertheless, it might take time and a lot of effort. You might have to bargain for more time. On certain occasions, you might succeed to get a viable repayment plan or an affordable interest rate from your credit card company.

Update Debt Elimination - October 2009

2009-11-08T15:07:00.000-08:00

My family and I started on the debt reduction journey about 6 weeks ago. Tonight I finally called the credit cards and got the current balances; I was suppose to do this at the start of each month but in the past it ALWAYS went bad.

1. Pull out spreadsheet of credit card balances, see last time it was updated, always a year to 14 months out of date. Verify with DH that we have been paying bills off for the past year.
2. Call the credit cards and update the spreadsheet.
3.See that the over all due balance is higher then the year before.
4. Get sick, mad and have a HUGE argument with spouse.
5. Put up the spreadsheet and be too scared and nervous to pull it out again for another year.

This time it was different.
1. Pulled out spreadsheet that was updated last month
2. Call the credit card companies
3. Yeah our overall balance is LOWER!!!

Credit Card Balance
Started September 2009 = $95,351
Current = $89,518

Cooking to save money

2009-10-26T19:26:00.000-07:00

At first it was hard getting use to cooking every day. It was not only the cooking but figuring out how to balance prep time, cooking time and still have time for everything else.

It took a couple of weeks but I think I have finally started to find a balance between finding new recipes of things my family will eat, using crock pot cooking and prepping meals before hand. Tonight I will prep for a meat loaf, it is one of my families favorites.

Medical Benefits and the Budget

2009-10-18T16:16:00.000-07:00

It is that time of year again, open enrollment for next years medical benefits. There use to be a time that I could just leave my choices from the current year and not worry about it since the only difference from one year to the next were the premiums. This has not been the case in the past few years. Each year there have been significant changes to the medical benefit options my employer offers, this year is no different actually I think it's more confusing then ever.

Medical Benefits changes - the ones that affect the money
1. cost of monthly premiums
2. Now there is a deductible
3. There is a healthy incentive premium credit

The issue is that my husband and I work for the same company and typically he covers himself and the children and I cover myself, this way we save about a dollar a month. Now we don't know what to do. If my husband covers every one we will be paying more in premiums then if i cover myself (factoring in the premium credits) but we will have a lot less in the deductible area that we are responsible for and a smaller stop loss.

I have been thinking about this for a week and I guess I will be thinking about it for a few more days before we decide what is best.
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Paying Credit Card Debt and Gaining Weight

2009-10-11T15:50:00.001-07:00

The first week of October was painful for the credit card debt paying journey. There was yelling, a lot of stress and number crunching, but I think we did it. We have a plan, allowances. My husband and I will each get an allowance for spending on our selves, and that's it if we run out of money then we are done for the month. This is our first major step to paying down our credit card debt.

We decided to do allowances after going over Septembers spending and discovered that a huge amount of money was being spent on restaurants and take out, almost $600 a month. Yes nearly $600 a month on eating food cooked outside the home. A $600 that could have been better used to pay off or at least keep credit card debt from growing.

I must admit I had not been cooking as much since the doctor told me I could stand to loose a few pounds. It's not that I don't want to cook but I get home so late, usually between 6 - 6:30pm that after going for a run there is no way I can cook something and have it on the table by 7:30pm for dinner.

To pay down the credit card debt I have started cooking every night and as I expected I have only been able to go for a run once in the past 2 weeks, not counting weekends. I feel terrible and now I am worrying about my long term health. My husband has been able to keep up his daily some times 2x a day workouts and I am trying not to be resentful.

I am hoping this week that I can make adjustments to my schedule so that I can start running again. Who would have thought that trying to pay down credit card debt could get in the way of weight loss?

Will we survive this credit card debt?

2009-09-30T18:32:00.000-07:00

Yesterday we argued again, I have been trying to keep track of our spending by using the online bank account to track discretionary spending. Both my husband and I work for the same company and we each get paid once a month on the same day. This has made tracking expenses, especially for spending extra hard.

Well it seems my husband feels I am nagging him about his spending, in reality I was trying to figure out what the ATM withdrawals he made and check card purchases were for. All I want to do is set a budget before pay day so we can determine how much we can afford to put towards paying down debt. This is the issue we had when I handled the finances in the beginning of our marriage. I figured we would each get an allowance and we would never need to have this conversation again; we just need to be able to determine what we need for what.

After a 20 minute conversation that got got every one upset and totally made me feel defeated and like giving up, my husband looks at me and says that he likes me doing the finances because it makes him think about every dollar before he spends it. Really??? How do you hate it and like it at the same time. I am so tired right now and it has only been a couple of weeks. I feel like throwing in the towel but I know that is giving up on my family's security and future.

Making Extra Cash to pay off Credit Card Debt?

2009-09-28T09:56:00.000-07:00

I have decided to try bringing in some extra money. Now I say trying because my current job is pretty demanding and the hours can vary. Along with travel time and kids it makes it a little hard to work a standard part time job.

Was talking to a friend who always works 1 or 2 part time jobs along with her main job. She mentioned that she got a second part time job for 10$ an hour. Nothing major just a few hours a week, but it provided her travel money.

I have been playing around with the ideal of writing for one of the internet sites that pay you for each article you write. The pay is only a few dollars per article but I figure 2-3 articles and I have $10 bucks to help pay down a bill. I am going to try it and see what happens.

Right now I am looking at Helium and Associated Content, think I will start with one of them. Any thoughts?

Weekend slip I mean trip...

2009-09-22T20:43:00.000-07:00

About 3 months ago my husband announced that he wanted the family to travel out of town for the weekend. He was running a race in another city and thought we could have a family weekend and see the sites.

At first I was like OK but once I found out how much we are in debt I was no longer interested in spending the money for a family weekend. At the same time I wanted to support my husband and did not want ANOTHER money argument. So we went on the weekend we did get a great rate on the hotel but had to pay for parking and eat.

I cringe at the amount of money that was spent, not because it was a lot(it wasn't) but I feel in our situation any amount of money is too much. I have decided to swallow this one and be quite, since the trip was planed under 'old management'.

I must say that as a family we have been doing better with our spending in the past week. It has been harder for my husband but we have decided to do allowances, hoping this helps. Will keep you posted.

Another Helpful article

2009-09-21T16:45:00.000-07:00

The New York Times has a really good article in its Your Money section. The article is called Hurry up and Credit My Money
by Ron Lieber. The article explains why banks can and do delay crediting our accounts for deposits but seem to instantly apply debits. The article is insightful and I especially like the comments.

$95,351.53 - Credit Card Debt Total

2009-09-20T18:25:00.001-07:00

With our credit card debt being so large I decided to concentrate on that debt alone. To be truthful by the time we pay off all the credit card debt everything else besides the mortgage will be paid off also.

I have verified all the credit card totals and the total is not $100,000 but $95,351.53. To be truthful with the numbers being so large there does not seem to be any real difference between $100,000 and $95,351 but It could have been $5,000 in the other direction so I will take if for what it is and be happy.

Another great article

2009-09-17T13:49:00.000-07:00

MSN Money has a great article called Get real: Downsize your money goals the article discusses how overly ambitions goals can discourage a person and keep them from trying to reach the goal. The article is by Liz Pullman Weston.

I think I am going to try setting mini goals and use them as steps leading up to the ultimate goal.

Moving Forward after Discovering Credit Card Debt

2009-09-16T00:17:00.000-07:00

OK we are attempting to formulate a plan for going forward and tackling the huge amount of debt we are in. $100,000 is forefront in my mind everyday ALL day. I feel like a failure and am embarrassed to discuss or tell friends or family. I can only discuss with my husband for a few minutes at a time or he becomes defensive. I feel so lost and alone, really hope keeping this blog helps to keep me sane.

We have attempted to do a budget and I say attempted because it turns out my husbands records are basically non existent. His process was to pay the bills and then shred them, there are no records of anything that was not a set bill, no record of the credit card charges or debit card use or bank withdrawals. Of course there are records of the charges or withdrawals themselves but no records saying what the charges and withdrawals are for.

So we have been able to say what are major bills are such as mortgage, utilities, anything with a monthly bill. But we are unable to determine anything else. At this point I am very frustrated but I do think we will be able to start to dig our selves out of this $100,000 hole...

Should I just walk away? Article on dealing with debt

2009-09-15T09:51:00.000-07:00

Here is an article by David Streitfeld it is in the New Your Times. The article is about walking away from debt and defaulting, not because you have to but because you can. I have not considered this option and don't think I want to. but I may change my mind once I get the full picture of the credit card debt damage. The article is called When Debtors Decide to Default. What do you think?

Helpful Article - Paying off Debt

2009-09-14T23:48:00.000-07:00

Here is one of the best articles I have seen for paying off debt. I will be trying some of the methods and tracking how they work in the blog. The article is called A debt payoff plan that works by Liz Pulliam Weston. The article is nicely written(always learn something from her articles) and is very simple to understand.

How the Credit Card Debt Happaned

2009-09-14T22:22:00.000-07:00

Lately my husband and I have been having problems. Typically he is very calm and even keel, but for the past few months he has been short tempered and a bit mean at times. After making the $100,000 debt discovery and talking it out with him, turns out he realized we were in trouble and did not know how to tell me or how to fix it.

Seems like dear husband was working on paying off the debt seriously (without telling me) for the past year. I thought we had been working on paying it off for years and were nearly done. A year ago our daycare bill went down substantially, freeing up a couple of hundred bucks which my husband started applying to paying off credit cards, and a couple of small ones did get paid off. One still has a $0 balance but the other is worse then ever with a $15,000 balance. Then the downturn in the economy hit us and we found our selves short $1000 a month. This is when the debt started growing instead of shrinking. We did adjust our spending, but not nearly enough. I assumed we were in a good spot financially and my husband did not want to tell me other wise. Seems he did not want to appear as a failure or change the family (or his) lifestyle.

I must accept my part in this HUGE mess. I should have insisted on seeing the bills, I was never kept from the bills but I knew that it would cause issues so I did not look. All I had to do was open the credit card statements and I would have see the problem before it became larger then a Boeing 747. Wish I had, I thought the worst that was going on were the debts being paid off slower then I would want. NEVER thought the debt was GROWING.

Here is how I think we got into this $100,000 debt mess, roughly. We moved to a new state a few years ago and got in about $30,000 debt then, from over spending, home repairs and moving expenses. Then we had a difficult pregnancy and after insurance there was a $20,000 bill which was placed on credit cards. The other 45 - 50,000 seems to have been racked up from the next two moves and living above our means. I just didn't realize it was above our means since I had buried my head in the sand about the debt.

Next...Moving Forward....

The $100,000 Credit Card Debt discovery

2009-09-13T17:11:00.000-07:00

3 days ago my life changed or better yet 3 days ago I discovered my real reality. My family is $100,000 in debt. That's credit card debt ONLY. Not including student loans, car notes, mortgage or home improvement debt; just credit card debt.

My husband and I both work full time. We have been married 15 years and have two children. On Thursday I was home on furlough and decided to check the balances on the credit cards, just too see what kind of shape we are in. I knew we had some credit card debt but thought we had worked out a plan. My plan was to make a couple of calls and feel good about the progress we were making on paying down the debt. Imagine my shock to discover we had nearly DOUBLE the amount of debt I was expecting.

As I checked the credit card balances and it began to dawn on me how much trouble we were in I went from shock to anger to fear. When we first got married I handled all the finances, while I had nearly no credit my husband had awful credit. But after a couple of years we had cleared up his credit, built up mine and we brought our first home.

With the purchase of a home, my new job of shift work and my husbands new Accounting degree we decided it would be better if he handled the finances. Really he decided and I agreed in order to keep the peace. My way of paying bills and saving had caused SOOOO many arguments and so much bad blood. My husband felt that he was being treated as a child, a poor child at that. I figured he had an accounting degree was very good at what he did so a household budget should be no problem.

Just writing about it is upsetting, I think I will stop for now and try again later.