iCollects

Remembering His Sacrifice this Lenten Season

2012-04-03T00:17:00.000+08:00

From: http://catholicriddle.blogspot.com/2012/02/welcome-lent.html

I am very much thankful to youtube and the internet because I have all the convenience to look up a lot of things, learn from discussions, practically everything. We are now entering Holy Week and I really love this song I heard somewhere a long time ago and when I attended the Holy Mass last Sunday, it was played and it really made me shed a few drops of tears. Searched for it and downloaded and here's the youtube copy:

No Greater Love

You loved me,

When I was so unlovely,

You sought me

When I was lost;

You showed me

How much You really loved me,

When You bought me

At the highest cost

There’s no greater love than this,

That a man would give his life for a friend;

There’s no higher sacrifice

Than a man would give his life,

You have paid

A precious price for me

You chose me,

When I was so unworthy

You cleansed me

With Your own blood;

You clothed me

With righteousness and mercy,

And You crowned me

With Your steadfast love

There’s no greater love than this,

That a man would give his life for a friend;

There’s no higher sacrifice

Than a man would give his life,

You have paid

A precious price for me

You have paid

A precious price for me…

I was actually humming this tune when I stepped down from my so called Pandora this evening and realized that God is more than just awesome designing our lives with all His unpredictable gifts and trials and I felt ashamed of myself expecting and guessing a lot of things He wants for me when in fact He just wants me to trust fully His will and His providence. How amazing, I was walking on the busy streets of IT Park this evening pondering a lot of things, searching for a cab but still thinking, yes, there's no greater love than His love for us. No, I can't think of any reason why I had to leave, I can't think of any reason for choosing the status quo either because I can't just depend on my happiness but then, the bottom line: He knows where I'm heading and I may only have a little idea about it, or probably still clueless, it really doesn't matter, while I am the pilot or the captain, He takes charge of everything. Looking up high to the heavens . . . :)

Deactivating and Reactivating Facebook Account

2012-04-01T01:00:00.000+08:00

I have been addicted to the internet and social networking sites since I got started with my friendster way back high school years. Then came facebook, multiply, twitter, myspace, linkedin, GooglePlus whichever started first, and now the latest is Pinterest. and I have skype too! I am not totally active in all mentioned sites but I keep and account in each of them except linkedin, with which I am planning to create one just so I can update my whereabouts regarding my profession and other career-related stuff. Two months ago, I thought of imposing some sort of disciplinary measures and deactivated my facebook and pondered on these:

It was cool. I was able to divert my attention to other sites with more sense. haha. I was able to study more and focus on other more important things. I get to watch my favorite tv series online and other teen-flick and romantic comedies I have saved in my hard disk for a long time, and I have started blogging again.
Only a few remembered my birthday. Though I was not expecting much from people and even from close friends, it was still amazing reading text messages from friends and colleagues who actually remembered me that day. It was even more overwhelming answering calls from relatives greeting me that day. Without facebook to remind them, that was pretty awesome!
I got to seclude myself from annoying updates from people practically having topics with no sense at all. ha! But still, I have an open mind to stat expressing opinions, ideals, concept and the like. I don't know how I'm gonna describe the kind of stat I really really don't want to read, just three words - not my type :D
I am not claiming to have detractors but I just don't like people who uses facebook to gossip around so when I came back, removed some and blocked some too. I am not expecting for them to understand, they are entitled to their own reaction/opinion/annoyance as much as I do.
I have to reactivate it when one of my superior asked me: "Do you have a facebook account? just in case we'd prefer to communicate with you through fb?" And I was like, "Oh I had it deactivated, I can reactivate it anytime though". Real ouch. So he decided to have it on skype and I kept thinking I have to reactivate my facebook because yeah, it's a lot useful and convenient at times.
I'm the only one in the family without facebook then and so I could not relate with all their communication stuff since Papa is working overseas and then most of my relatives, cousins are hooked up in facebook, even my little pamangkins. haha
I miss my friends too, those people I usually connect with through facebook, I miss commenting and liking stuff and I miss posting stats and check ins!
My timeline got cut. tsk tsk. When I came back, there's a huge blank already, or like a vortex of two months.

Now that I am back, aside from unfriending people I don't want to just follow my daily tasks and whatnot on facebook, I have also hidden some stats and updates from individuals I am not really a fan of. Well, I still consider myself entitled to such privilege of removing anyone I simply don't like, not the person of course, but the attitude she/he has. *smiles*

25 is just a number

2012-04-01T00:28:00.002+08:00

Got it from http://uwstopia.nl/blog/2008/01/happy-birthday-to-me

through Google

In a few more days, I am turning 25, quarter-life many would say. Looking back, I can vividly see the past so worth cherishing, and these moments of the year, if I only have the luxury of time, I would have planned ahead to go on a long walk on the beach, alone in the long stretch of fine white sands with the waves gently hammering my bare feet as the sun slowly hides herself to slumber, while I contemplate on the kind of life I have today and for the past 25 years. That wouldn't do for now, I barely have the time to write this because I still have pending stuff to do just so I can fulfill the requirements for my subjects this semester. Nevertheless, I am celebrating my birthday the traditional way, planning to go to church to attend mass, thank the Lord for all the blessings He showered not only to me but to all the people I love so dearly, for all the answered prayers, for the trials and struggles, for everything that led me to where I am right now.

For my 25th birthday, I am recalling the most important lessons I have learned in my entire existence, with which I am very much thankful, for without them, my mistakes, errors and lapses would be really insignificant. Warning, these are all based on my experiences, thus my viewpoints does not necessarily reflect your own and I have no intention to mislead you in whatever perception of life you may have.

Life is a race. But it really does not matter who you are racing with or against, because the more you race with your own self, the more you are bound to get to your goal. Just like marathon, you run like no one is watching, that the other runners do not exist because you are focused on the song in your iPod, the ticktocks of your timer and the humdrum of your heartbeat. You don't have to base your success in whatever success your colleagues have nor your circle of friends are bragging because once you compare your success to them, you are bound to creating someone who is not you.
Your friends change and you are not supposed to go along with his or her changes just so you would remain friends. Allow changes to happen, accept your friends as they are and if you find their stuff just not right for you, do not, in anyway, comment against it, rather, keep yourself keen and aware that you should not do such things nor apply such concept in your own paradigm.
Believe in the power of prayers, so as the power of Catholic and religion-oriented schools. At a very young age, being a toddler then, I learned how to pray piously because not only I was taught by my parents but we always do it in school. I was enrolled in a fundamental baptist school, though most of its pupils were like me, a Roman Catholic, I was exposed to prayers and opening my heart to the Holy Spirit, to Jesus and surrendering to Him everything though I barely knew then what it actually meant but, mind you, it was my stepping stone to building a stronger bond with God. Ever since then, I would always pray before I go to sleep so God will save me from nightmares and as years go by, I eventually learned to say a prayer every morning when I wake up, basically thanking Him for my new life, pray for my families, relatives, friends and even strangers. I read the scriptures from time to time and always, I would learn a lot from it. So to follow the legacy bestowed upon me, I am hoping that someday, I, too would be sending my off-springs to Catholic schools, it matters a lot.
You can't hurry love, you just have to wait. LSS from an old song, You can't Hurry Love. If you are looking for the right man, be the right woman. Simple as that, no need to elaborate.
Do not regret. You were once happy making that decision. As always heard, you learn with your mistakes, with your choices no matter how silly and stupid it was.
Experience teaches us more than what we learn in school. Theories will always be just theories. You need to work in order to expand your knowledge, in order to apply what you have learned and in order to be more efficient in the real world.
Lastly, for now, always remember the basic moral values, those things we learned at home, we learned from our GMRC (Good Manners and Right Conduct) and from our other religious education subjects. Do not be misled by the modern world. Keep in mind that not all things accepted by the society is good. Not all that shines like gold are gold either. The virtues we learned when we were still kiddos should always be the virtues we have to live by, and live with. Be silly at times but never neglect the essence of being modest and moral at the same time.

I still have a very long way to go, God's will of course, and I am not even sure if I will be remembering all these stuff I am mentioning right now but with God's guidance, I am certain everything will be just fine.

As I have continued to write this one, my birthday passed already. Got caught up with other matters and I sort of left this blog for a while. I have been changing decisions like a switch turning it on and off almost everyday and I feel like the line bordering my dreams and my comfort is getting thicker. Ouch.

My birthday cake from Figaro by my sister dearest :)

Viell Turning One

2012-02-26T02:58:00.000+08:00

While I am waiting for the water dispenser to heat up for my milk, I am once again watching the video I created with Windows Movie Maker for one of my goddaughter who is turning one this Monday, February 27, 2012.

Viell was born to a mother just the same age as I am and while I was compiling the clips, I was thinking how wonderful it might really be, to have an offspring, a child who bears exactly the genes of their folks passed from generation to generation. Of course it's sort of too early to think about such things considering I am still on the verge of my career's take off and I am still starting my post grad studies which reminds me of the numerous stuff still pending, nevertheless, I know I have to deal with them sooner, but anyway, yes, a lot of my friends, colleagues of the same age bracket are now having their own families and enjoying the fruits of their early labors and watching their offsprings break their legs and learn. They look happy and they seem really happy, well then, maybe they are really happy and fulfilled with what they are doing, having to carry their babies with pride, feeding them, go shopping with them, sounds cool, but really can't imagine that with me.

Making this video for Viell, it felt like having watched her evolved from an innocent little darling to an amazing princess always loved, cared, nurtured, spoiled and comforted. Since I have resigned from the company where Viell's dad is currently working, I haven't seen Viell for quite sometime already, three months to be exact and seeing the pictures her dad sent and her mom requested to be included really amazed me, her achievements as a little princess, her progress and her wit and glamour taking into places with her growth. Every child is indeed an angel and Viell will never be an exception. It might be too early to tell but I can see a brilliant kid growing up, a smart and witty princess. Prayers, hopes and wishes goes to you my dear, may you find success in every endeavor you may want to pursue, and for me, only time can tell when and how will I ever enjoy the sweet victory of seeing a little me but definitely it will be later, when God knows I am ready, in all aspect involving it.

Sharing now the video I created, just a simple chronological presentation of Viell's growth, achievements and fun. I have included the music of a Happy Birthday Song by Nina since it's Viell's first birthday and her mom requested the song, the Hercules Theme Song, I Can Go the Distance, because I personally like the song, the courage and determination to reach your goals and ambitions being implied and The Greatest Love of All by Whitney Houston because I just love its lyrics emphasizing the significance of children and our growth and being independent as well as courage to face endeavors as we continue to walk on the path of life.

新年快乐！

2012-01-23T04:03:00.000+08:00

Image courtesy of 123Greetings

Kung Hei Fat Choi! I am not Chinese and as far as our family history is concerned, our bloodlines is not connected with Chinese. I am neither celebrating Chinese New Year nor will be indulging into Chinese traditions but I find myself wearing red shirt and white with pink prints pajama right now. hahaha. I am off to sleep in a while and I remember yahoo headlines for a few days now regarding 2012 Predictions. Read a few lines and pondered. I remembered having passed by a huge print of 2012 predictions in SM Cebu. Rabbit was said to be lucky this year and I can barely recall the details. Early of January, one of Bandila's segment featured the well-known Feng Shui expert Marites Allen and all I remember was that the Rabbits romance and love aspect in life is favorable this year. I also remember her mentioning about the favorable change of work in February or March which actually made me smile while watching because I was then planning to transfer to another structural firm. If I'd have to make it such a big deal, what I read in yahoo was a little bit different from the sources I have mentioned, and I just realized now that I have to ward off this feeling of somehow depending on luck and predictions. Credits to Feng Shui masters who never fail to remind people the importance of hard work, perseverance and choices. I believe there are no better way to reach your goals but by working hard for it, and of course praying and having a deeper faith to the Lord. Nevertheless, I will be wearing a combination of pink blouse and white pants on my first day of work next week. Not that I have read it from Yahoo's 2012 Predictions, but more so because I feel comfortable and well poised with it. haha. Anyway, I am saving 2012 Horoscope for the Rabbit but believe it or not, I haven't read it totally between the lines because I think this is way vague and absurd, besides, I still strongly believe that hard work really pays. Okay, I am bias, I know, because if I read something like I'd be lucky, I'd go for it and it would actually create a clever smile in me. hahaha. So for this, naaaah, (from astrology.com).

Overview

True, the Dragon's pace isn't as comfortable as that of the Rabbit. And yes, this year could be a bit more challenging for you than the last one. But come on, you're looking at seven favorable months! You'll have plenty of opportunities to do what you want and go where you like -- and be successful while you're at it. For now, it's all about timing. Pick your spots, plan celebrations, make big trips and start new projects during your favorable months. And when the unfavorable ones roll around, head for the comfort of your Rabbit hole, where you can avoid risk, spend time with the people you trust the most, and be comfortable with the old while waiting to start the new.

Career

Oh boy. The Dragon is always tempting everyone to make big changes and take huge leaps ... but this really isn't the time for you to follow in his footsteps. Things will shift and change a whole lot in 2012, so your job will be to find steady ground and hang on for dear life. Stay within your areas of expertise. Do what you're good at and what will generate the most money. Don't implement any big business ideas or career moves just yet; if you insist on doing so, wait until your lucky months to make changes. Persistent effort should pay off.

Relationships

Are you on edge about your love life? Indeed, Dragon years have that type of effect. For you, the Dragon's passion and impulsiveness are a little unnerving, as you prefer when people are calm and act rationally. Luckily, Water gives relationships a boost by helping with communication. The good news is the Dragon favors marriage and celebrations. Do you hear wedding bells? This could be your year to take the big leap into love. If you're single, 2012 could be a roller coaster of interesting dates and several different relationships. Be cautious about professing your love right away -- the Dragon loves passion, but it can be fleeting. Hang on tightly and try to enjoy the ride!

Health

It's possible your nervous tendencies could be heightened this year, so make sure you take care of yourself and your mental state. The Dragon's devil-may-care attitude probably makes you quiver; you can also expect others to act slightly crazy and unpredictable. Make time for quiet introspection and ensure your home is a place of refuge. If you have the energy, take up a high-intensity activity such as Bikram yoga or marathon-running. Channel nervous energy into healthy outlets, and keep an eye on your nutrition. After all, the Dragon tends to overdo it and indulge.

Wealth

You probably don't need any warnings about your finances -- after all, you certainly have a way with money. If you can remain savvy about your finances, you might even do well this year -- that is, if you're able to avoid the Dragon's influence for big risks and impulsive purchases. It could be tempting to make costly home upgrades or book an expensive vacation. Use your lucky months for any necessary big spending, but don't go crazy with it.

Happy Birthday to a Dear Friend

2012-01-23T02:22:00.000+08:00

For everything that we've been through,

For all the laughter and giggles we once shared,

Thank you!

Happy Happy Birthday Tines!

You've been so good you deserve nothing but the best among the bestest!

God bless you always, and may you continue to

be just the Tiny we know.

You're simplicity, kindness, wit and glamour is more than just an epitome!

mwaaahhh mwaaaahh

Sending lots of love and warm wishes from the Pearl of the Orient Seas

to the Land of the Rising Sun!

Image Courtesy of http://burburchan.wordpress.com/2011/04/10/happy-birthday-tiny/

A greeting sent through email to a very dear friend.

Composed it here so that I won't be having a hard time attaching the whole thing

in my email.

I don't own the pics and very much thankful to google.

Love

2012-01-19T00:50:00.000+08:00

I have always been a hopeless romantic. Ever since I knew what crushing means.haha. I remember I was still in my first grade then when my classmate told me she knew I had a crush on someone, and I was like, what does crush mean? From that day forward, the word has always been a part of my silly days. nyahaha. Was I crushing too early? LOL I grew up admiring people, not that I spent my whole quarter life looking for some good-looking prince charming or stalking but then it became a part of my silly side which spiced up my life a bit extreme I should say. I learned to read novels, romantic novels at an early age, then moved on to suspense-thriller but still with love involved when I reached high school. Even when I got used to reading and following the series of Harry Potter, I'd always wished Harry to find his perfect princess. I have always believed in fairy tales, happy endings, love stories to last a life time. I have always believed in love. I have had my fair share of pains and tears and dreams before someone swept off my feet in 2004. That was it. I never thought it would be love. Oh, the magic of the word itself. Was I that lucky? I was blessed, with a man who respects me in a way I never even dreamed of. As the Princess Diaries said, he saw me when I was invisible. Yes, he was there crushing on me and realizing my worth when everyone else were dreaming of their own happy endings. He just saw me as the way I would want a man to see me. Exactly. I believed in his sincerity, his undying love and his well-expressed emotions. In a generation where perfect men are nowhere to be found, I have found the perfection in him. Seven years was quite long but I would love to have it longer than a lifetime. So here's a classic song that always reminds me of how it feels to be enchanted with the magic of love when finally, someone swept off my feet on the 18th of December 2004.

New Year Tradition, the simple way

2012-01-10T01:01:00.000+08:00

13 fruits on the table

something long and sticky spaghetti and sweetened malagkit rice/biko
and lots of pork, no chicken :)

chocolates for the sweets

red wine as always, plus cranberry juice

fish for a healthy lifestyle, to balance the meat haha

planner to track down events and appointments

the email gift

Christmas

2012-01-10T00:20:00.001+08:00

At Christmas, all roads lead home.

-Marjorie Holmes

Flying home. From Cebu to Tacloban with love. full of love. <3

red red wine!

I arrived home around 7:00 in the evening already on the 24th. Five hours before our traditional Noche Buena. I was thankful enough that the plane was on time. We landed on Tacloban National Airport 3:30pm, and a close friend fetched me and dropped me off in Duptours Terminal. A long ride home, 2 hours land trip from Tacloban to Ormoc City. I had my luggage with me and I was really tired but the spirit of Christmas was still giving me hope to reach home. I was more than blessed that day, a safe and sound travel, I knew then I was being a taught a lesson. Whew.

A Christmas gift email.

For next year's another road to trail on.

Remembering Jesus' birthday, I thank Him for all the blessings,

and of course, my safe and thrilling arrival.

Still stuck here. :(

2011-12-24T06:59:00.001+08:00

It's almost Christmas and in a few hours we will be having our family Noche Buena at home and here I am still stuck in our pad in Cebu. I was supposed to go home yesterday, supercat at 4:40 pm but I was not able to catch up. Apparently, it left on time and it was my fault because I had my last-minute shopping for gifts and pasalubong plus the traffic which was very much expected this time of the year, and so when I arrived in Pier 4, the guard refused to let me in and declared the vessel was already for boarding. I had no choice but to go to the ticketing area hoping that I could still reschedule for today but obviously all trips today were fullybooked already few days ago. Weesam was also fullybooked as well as all other vessels including those destined for other towns in Leyte. I was desperate. I could not imagine spending my Christmas away from my family, and alone in my pad. No way. So I went to SM, left my luggage in Traveler's Lounge. I had to make sure, so I searched for a ticketing agency for planes. When I arrived in Skyliner, I was informed that the one and only flight for Tacloban today was fullybooked too. I was hopeless but I kept praying and waited for my priority number. Thankfully, before my number was called, I was informed again that there are still available tickets for Cebu Pacific Flight for Tacloban today at 3:10PM. Whew! Then I was thinking of the vhire afterwards, if there will still be trips from Tacloban to Ormoc upon my arrival. That would be around 4:00pm already. I have to endure around 2 hours or more to reach home. Oh God be with me. I really need to be home. Crossing fingers for now. :)

Quarter Life Crisis

2011-12-23T02:06:00.000+08:00

The holidays is fast approaching and here I am still unable to sleep and speechless of everything that has happened since the start of the year. Listening to a classic song, The Best of Me by David Foster, not that I can totally relate to the song, I am really pondering to the deepest sense I am capable of, nonetheless I cannot fathom God's plan for me and for the rest of the years to come.

Yesterday, I went to TTSP to claim my certificate of employment and some other important things when I realized upon reaching Balamban that indeed, I was not remorseful with my decision to leave my previous job. Every memory I thought I may have forgotten went back, how I weighed things up, how I viewed every possibility and it all ended to simply quitting my job because I need to further explore myself in relation to my chosen profession and passion as well. Though a lot of factors I have also considered during those times of dilemma, I guess those will remain undisclosed due to its sensitivity. When I reached the Industrial Park, I was somehow reminded why I held on to my job for almost a couple of years, and yes it mattered. It mattered so much that I know my stay there was irrevocably memorable. I don't find it hard to admit that I missed my friends, my cubicle, my jogging place, my former room, my environment around CIPDI, my previous paradigm, but I don't find it hard to admit either that back then when I handed my letter of resignation, I was extremely excited to get out and leave so that I can finally trail another road. Yesterday I realized that there are things I have to let go, no matter how painful it would be, that I have to cherish life today because these are just mere consequences of the decisions I have made before, that my friends that were part in molding my life before will still have a part in me today but a lot more different than that of the days I spent in Balamban. Change, always constant, I know. I just miss them. Our bond, our silly times, everything. It was a pack I will forever cherish. Three quarters of my 2011 were spent with them, and my birthday last March was one of the best! I have found real good friends in such an unusual pack.

I am not remorseful with my current job either. I am even happy and fulfilled I am finally pacing the road I wanted to walk on. I have been passionately exerting my best effort to learn and as well as enjoy what I have been doing. I can feel the sense of fulfillment in every project I'd finished and it's totally overwhelming to see my work in the computer monitor. My Master's Degree started with twists and turns with all the time constrictions and countless tasks in the office and in school. Just like those times in TTSP when I would ask myself if I am still doing the right thing, I would still ask myself the exact question now, but then my answer before totally differs from my answer now. All I know was that everything before was uncertain which is very much unlikely to my situation now wherein I would just relax and tell myself that whatever struggles I am undergoing now, will result to a better tomorrow, that someday, I know, I will have something to harvest worthy of my struggles now. Should I continue doing this? Of course. There is no point returning, only another left turn or right perhaps.

I am looking forward to another turn next year. Still uncertain for a lot of things but then I would simply look up to the heavens and lift up to Him everything. He gave this to me, I have no doubt about that. It will still be the same learning but a little further and I know I have to allow growth a lot faster now. I can't believe how this year created a maze in me. I am thankful to the Lord for everything. I have no idea how and why He has given all these to me now, and I don't even know if I will ever found out the answers to my countless questions, I just have to trust Him more fully. I have gone this far because of Him, and I don't think I can go a lot more farther without Him. Saving the best for next year, excited, crossing fingers, keeping my feet on the ground. Everything will be just fine.

Bitter much, spare me.

2011-12-17T00:45:00.001+08:00

From the overused idiomatic expression, I have been thinking if the recent turn out of events can be well considered as a perfect example of the subject. A supposedly healthy competition which I think resulted to a bitter one.

We all know that life is a race and from time to time, we encounter competitions from the small ones like parking spaces to a rather huge and delicate stuff. Job vacancies, for example. A friend of mine recently told me about a newly opened US-based firm here in our locality. As opportunity-driven and go-getter as I am, I immediately applied through e-mail, and apparently, got accepted.

But then the story was not as easy as it seemed. My two colleagues applied too. Unfortunately, one copied my resume format, with all the font type, font size, margins, arrangement of details and even the indention. I could have been furious. It was plagiarism. That resume was supposedly my trademark. I have had that format ever since I learned how to creatively advertise myself way back in my English class in college. But I thought may be I could let it pass, after all, he swore he would submit another entry with another format. He did actually.

We were all interviewed on the same day but with different time slot. The colleague who copied my resume was interviewed first, before my time slot, then the last one was our other colleague. I almost thought I wouldn't make it, I was almost late, and I did not prepare any answer to the possible questions. I admit I had a set of possible questions studied beforehand, given actually by the same colleague, but every time I'd think for a perfect answer, I could not come up with any, so I decided to go with the flow and just be myself. I think I have handled it well, apparently, my application was a success, I received an email about a possible position while my two other colleagues did not receive any. It was supposedly not a big deal, or so I thought.

Things went worse when I would hear bitter comments like, I got accepted because I'm a woman and the interviewees were men, stuff like those which involves how I dressed up, in other words, he noted a lame reason for my acceptance. I would not have made a big fuss out of such negative feedbacks, but then, he was too coward, and too bitter to have ranted it over to someone who maliciously spread those small stuff which eventually reach my ears. The worst thing is, he even made a lot more stories which are beyond what I expected from a professional like him.

I guess other details should remain undisclosed as I still prefer to leave a mark of moral values in his personality.

Yes, I got accepted, but no, I won't be explaining how and why I think I got the slot, that would be the sole job of the interviewees who, I guess, found a potential in me. I would not say I am smart, because I believe that the moment I consider myself brilliant, that would be the moment I'd have to be dull. All I want to emphasize is that, losing entails an act of humility. When you lose, you are supposed to acknowledge your weakness, and not point-out the flaws or even the strength of others which you think caused your defeat. It is all about you, no one else but you, not me and neither the judges. In a running race, for example, when you place second, you don't blame the first one to have defeated you because he runs faster, you have to blame yourself because you ran slower than he did. It's always a matter of perceptions and viewpoints.

I managed to let go of his plagiarism with my resume, even this, I know I ought to forgive. It's Christmas, and instead of counting all the bad experiences, I should remember all the blessings received and the coming ones. But trust will never be restored. I have finally uncovered his concealed identity. It's not always right to hate people, but I am making sure I am not hating him, I just don't care removing him from my so-called trusted friends.

My Honduran Curly Hair

2011-12-06T22:51:00.001+08:00

I have been fascinated with my Honduran Curly Hair (Brachypelma albopilosum) for more than a year now. It has been with me since October 18, 2011, it was still an inch big then. It was a gift actually and I never thought I'd be more than delighted having such mini pet. During my start, I had no idea how to really take care of this sensitive creature, but google's always ready to answer my countless q's. Today, my tee (as what I always prefer to call my little angel) is more than 4 inches big. It's kept inside a terrarium about 8 inches cube and provided with a mini pool for her hydration. By the way, she's a she and I'm glad about it because in their world, the females are always dominant than the males. The females are most of the time, larger and more vibrant in colors than the males. :)

Anyway, my tee is a terrestrial type, thus it's more than a crawler than a climber and needs a larger enclosure compared to other types. What I love most in her is her calmness and her ability to adapt with people. She seems friendly as she almost always allow people to hold her and even crawl on their arms. I have tried allowing her to crawl in my arms once but her huge physique was somehow not tolerable in my small arms. Based on what I have read from care sheets available in search engines, this specie has lower toxins and are less dangerous. I haven't heard anyone killed with its bites, and so far, with all my previous officemates so anxious to hold her, no one was bitten.

This was her in her enclosure, first few months

My tee is my first ever pet aside from our family dog. I consider her my diversion but not much of a passion. When I was still in TTSP, she was kept hidden inside a wooden compartment. I would provide her with feeders roaches a.k.a. lateralis, about half the size of her body, almost twice a day depending on the availability. I am always thrilled seeing her grab her food just like any other predator.

For more than a year, here's actually what I have learned about her:

She has the cutest defense mechanism. She has this manner of raising up either of her two hind legs to rub it on her butt and secrete a powdery stuff which I think I am very allergic of because I will be itching and scratching my neck and arms after that. This happens always when I would try to play with her by poking her back. hahaha.
She knows when she's free or not and she knows how to resist captivity when freed. Just like any other creature, she's brilliant enough to find an escape and in fact, she once got out from her enclosure and I was really having a hard time of putting her back in it. She was also freed once and was made to crawl on a broad paved area of our covered court in TTSP. When it was her time to go back to her enclosure, she would simply resist crawling into my friend's hand because she knew she would be again my captive.
I would know if she is about to molt because aside from her decreased appetite, she would dig up a burrow and hid herself there. After a few days, tsadah! her molted skins!
She's not the perfect climber. She's been trying to climb the glass walls in her enclosure and I would just giggle watching her slide every now and then. There was one time she got out of her old enclosure hidden in my drawer, she was awfully crawling on one of the my wooden table's stand. She was really trying hard to land safely and I was preparing myself for her fall just in case. Thankfully, she made it to the floor safe and into her enclosure. whew!
Her breed is for beginners but just like other tarantulas, it's always better to be very extra careful handling them because once they are dropped, and their abdomen is cracked, they are considered dead.

For now, my Honduran Curly Hair consumes 3 adult roaches per meal. She eats almost once a day or once in every two days with her pool of water always filled. Though many spider lings of her breed are available these days, I still look forward to mate her and see another sets of her breed someday. By the way, I had a Singapore Blue (Lampropelma violaceopes) once, but unfortunately, it died when it was still a month old, still very tiny I can't tell her gender yet.

It was supposed to look like this when it matures but then the happenings were so sudden, I guess it was due to lack of moisture or perhaps the room's too cold (air-conditioned), I had no idea. Anyway, I think I am not ready for more aggressive breeds yet, may be someday.

Moving on, one step forward

2011-11-12T17:20:00.001+08:00

I was crossing my fingers as I felt nostalgia upon entering the gates of my old alma mater. It was familiar still despite of the changes that took place in just a couple of years. The process was not as easy as I expected. But accomplishing all the requirements as I went back from work to school vice versa taught me one thing - in order to remain grounded, I have to experience difficulties; my struggles today reminded me that I am a normal being, that I do have to cross those mountains in order for me to feel the ground with every climb I make.

Today could be the start of another journey, the main reason why I left my former job, to pursue postgraduate studies. And the song embedded above deeply portrays the euphoric sensation I am in right now for finally having enrolled in three subjects under Master's of Engineering in Civil Engineering, specializing in Structural and Geotechnical Engineering. I know it will be a tough challenge.

So here's the lyrics which gave more meaning to my unexpected but well-thought out decision, with which I was able to finally cross over from my dreamland to reality:

He will paint the light and shades
The colours and the trees
He will climb the steepest hill
Believing what he sees
He will lay down on the ground
Beneath the old oak tree
He will sleep forever
If you try to set him free

Sail on the wings of a cloud
Where to, well nobody knows
And cry, cry if you want them to see
Die every day to be free
Be proud to wear the colours that you call your own
Be loud, speak out when you want the world to know
Be strong, hold the flame for everyone to see
Be weak, if you want to love.

He will paint the endless sea.
A mystery to me
He will reach out for the sun,
Not dreaming what he sees
He will fall down on his knees
Angel touching ground
Takes him to the other side
Sweet love is coming down.

The song rather depicts the great risk of learning to explore the world, to discover what is yet to be discovered and search for the most important piece in the puzzle of life. Of course it will take detours, and we have to stumble from time to time, understand that nothing is easy, and learn to accept the circumstances of our decisions.

For my recent cross over, these things has been noted:

Intuition plays an important role in decision making. We have to trust our instinct and believe that it's one of the most mysterious thing in our existence. When I decided to finally let go of my comfort zone in TTSP, I knew then it was the right time. Indeed, the transition was smooth.
God's providence never fails anyone. Just as long as the time is right and we feel that we deserve what we are asking, He will answer in an unexpected and bulk blessings. He guides our intuition all the time, and He will always be the sole reason why I would depend on my instinct in times of dire need.
I know who my real friends are and happy to note that they are actually gems worth keeping. I know the fakes and I know the competitors, the bitter and those with hidden agenda as well, in all sorts of factors. Nevertheless, I credit them for making a worthwhile environment.
Decisions should never be made when we are at the peak of our emotion. EVER. Many times, during one of our team meeting in the office, I was tempted to open up and just say I want to quit but then I held my thoughts to allow chances to myself and to the concerned individuals as well. As it turned out, the right time came few more months later.
and lastly, as always, there is no perfect place, no perfect job, no perfect group of people. It's a matter of choosing which would you allow to tear you into pieces that's most acceptable. There has to be something to give up and let go and accept new things, eventually learn to love them as they are. and of course, we have to do what we long to do and stay afloat in the sail of life.

I am way far from the real thing. I have yet to discover a lot of things for my half-filled cup. I have asked myself before, would these things matter in the many years to come? of course, that's why I am virtually pouring out all these, that in time, I will have to laugh reading these posts. :)

Keeping the memories alive

2011-11-07T00:50:00.001+08:00

From my batch, my friends, and a few who have been oh so dear to me. Super lucky to have them. The warm goodbyes were very overwhelming.

So to save the memories, I have here written, their messages from my uniform during my last day in TTSP.

The uniform I was using wednesday.

unwashed. :)

Aisa, Goodluck to your chosen path. We know that para na sa imong kaayuhan. Treasure the moments sa mga pinagsamahan. And Hopefully keep in touch gihapon namu. God bless you always.

-BEAU

Dear Isamarch,

Kini nga message akong gisuwat tungod kay naa ko pentelpen. ^_^. Good luck lang ah. TC always, God bless you.

"HAPAK"

"GRRRR"

"BWAHAHA"

Dili na mi kita ani sa email. ^_^

Your batchmate,

-MIKEZ

Aiz,

Kung saan ka masaya, te, suportaan ta ka.... Cge bye!!! Apas lang ko...

-CONDZ RADZ

Aiz!

Thanks sa tanan! Di nalang ko enumerate kay pangitaon! hehe, bitaw thanks! Thanks au sa friendship nga nisamot pag-abot nato :) God bless Aiz in your new adventure. We are so happy for you. I wish makamit nimu tanan desire sa imo heart. Yngatz always! See you sa city. Kuha gihapon ko obagi ha!! hehehe. I'm gonna miss you Aiz! Anad2x guro ni para sa future larga! :)

-TINY

Sayonara my manita.

-RENREN

Ais,

mamis nako imo sumbag ug hapak. hehe. bitaw take care always and God bless sa imung new career.

-RHENZ

Ais,

ala na mi kabatch na maldita...yehey!!! bitaw, ayo2x ug amping kanunay...

P.S. ayaw kalimot hatag sa SF.

-PAULA

Babes,

I never knew I could miss a person this much. But that's what I felt by just the thought of you leaving. =( But seeing you happy is more important. May the Lord fulfill the desires of your heart. Stay bubbly and Sexy and beautiful and . . . . =)

:You will always remain in here ---> <3

XOXO,

-BRAD CHECHE

Hi Ais!!!

Good luck and God bless sa imo new journey. May you find happiness and contentment in your career. Take care of yourself always. =)

-THEA

Aisa,

Treat your TTSP XP as a humble beginning (Bisag layo ra sa imo field) and your friendship with us a once in a lifetime and forever worth reminiscing memory...Good luck and God bless sa imo new found career. Stay healthy!

-JAC

Ais,

Thank you so much for everything, your life is a blessing to us. I will miss you ais. Love you. Sharing to you. Jer.29:22 God bless!

-ANN

Hello Ais...

Salamat sa friendship amping lang pirmi. God bless you...Sul-uba ni inig laag nimo sa SM.. Hehe

-ANDREW

Gaw =)

Happy sail-out! Enjoy life and God bless..

-ABZ

Hello Gamay,

Actions bound by our decision. Always have faith and enjoy the thrill of life. God bless...

Till we meet next time =)

-KUYA SONJ (with tarantula drawings aweeee)

Hello Aiz,

May you completely find the desires of your heart. God bless you always.

-ARCS

Aiz,

Bye... BIsan di na ta magkita, you will always remain in my huna2x... =)

God bless!

-MARC

Isamarch,

God bless sa new career. Thanks sa friendship, for all the chikas and kilig2x.. hehe.. we will miss you

-KIM

Sa bawat hakbang mo palayo sa lugar na to, iyong gunitain at sariwain and mga sandaling pinagsamahan ng ating pangkat. Samahan na pinagtibay ng kapatiran. Wag mong kalimutan itong munting kaibigan na pinalaki ang puso ng iyong presensya.

Ang iyong munting anghel,

-TATA SANTINO A.K.A. HARVEY

In life there are people that would pass us by, leave us and make us cry. But, keep this message close to your heart. We cry because we love the person that have embarked... See you soon!

Angel # 8,

-JAEL

Ais!!!

Since dili na man jud mapugngan, hala go!.. hehe.. Just want you to know that you've been a good friend to me. Wish you all the luck and God bless. Ü

-ANINAX

As I copied all these messages, my heart was filled with awe, with how blessed I am, surrounded with people like them. Yes, I am keeping in touch through fb, emails, yes, I still have your birthday gifts, and I will always cherish our bondings, our moments. Guys, thank you for everything! By the way, first time in history na siguro ni nga medyo taas2 ang message ni rodell contrary to what has always been his trademark of one-liner greetings. :)

I will be seeing you very soon! :)

For the benefit of my poor memory

2011-11-05T19:31:00.000+08:00

My farewell drama to the pack who taught me how to love a paradigm of diversified individuals, who challenged me to do better everyday and who opened up another dimension of possibilities, dreams and realities. With much love and sincerity, this article has been composed days before my farewell to them and eventually was done few hours before I made my final adieu.

My Journey, My Struggles, My Choices: No Holds Barred

The Starting Point

I entered the review center room with confidence that I will make it. Not the board exam but the preliminary examination for Tsuneishi Technical Services Philippines Inc. I answered all the questions with intense feeling of fulfillment. I was relaxed. That was August 2009. Who would have thought that I would seriously give myself a chance to work here? Nevertheless, I went miles as I undergo all the tedious procedures just to be chosen among the hundreds of candidates, mostly reviewees like me aiming for the best spot. I felt the star danced with me as I read the text message confirming my acceptance. I knew then, it was the start of my journey to the real world.

The Road Less Traveled

Thought sank in just a few days after my first day – the road I have chosen to explore was way different from what I have expected. I was crying almost every night because I was desperate to quit. But I was too weak to do it. Along with the daily undertakings I went through, I have managed to face the consequences of my choice calmly. I knew God was part of it. He gave me what I have asked and prayed for. I looked at every positive thing to consider and I stayed here. I gave myself a chance to get to know my work better and accepted the challenge of learning the Mould Lofting job. It was not an easy task. The terminologies were cracking up my nerves. The different orientations of numerous plans and drawings covering up my table were messing my entire cubicle the way it seemingly messed up my whole emotional balance. I would write in my journal pouring out all my frustrations in myself, my choices and my decisions. I would talk to my parents and enumerate all the experiences I had dealing with my work, the people around and the environment; and they would always encourage me to continue and cope up because I was born a fighter. I did. I managed to stay firm in this battlefield. For a year and almost 9 months, I knew I have enjoyed. My stay was a lot more worthwhile than anyone can credit.

The Dilemma and the Choice

Almost exactly a year ago, I wrote my Resignation Letter for a sole reason – I want to pursue post graduate studies. But I was not able to print it out because I was, again, too weak to quit. Struggling positively, I waited for the right time, always telling myself that I will never stay here for too long. Just a few weeks ago, I was on my normal daily routine when suddenly, after staring blankly into my monitor, I came to a realization – I am no longer happy dealing with NC pieces. I am longing for buildings, houses and other infrastructures. But still, I was faced with a dilemma – two roads diverged with an insurmountable boundary. One, to pursue my post graduate studies and practice structural/civil engineering and two, to continue what I have started here and increase my skill level by learning the different softwares globally used. I applied for several firms, all related with ship designs except for one – a structural firm owned by a former instructor. Fate was playful, because I was left to choose between another well-known Ship Design Firm in Cebu City and a Structural Firm. I decided – this is my chance to pursue what I have long been missing, so I grabbed the opportunity as I got accepted in the Structural Firm, turning down one of the best Ship Design Firm in Asia. That was September 10, 2011 – one of the most fulfilling days I had. I cancelled my filed undertime for Monday (September 12, 2011) because I was looking forward to finally printing my long-time saved Resignation Letter.

The Transition: My Thoughts to Actions

First thing’s first. Immediately after the bell rang, Monday (September 12, 2011), I printed out my official letter of farewell, and handed it to my Supervisor with a smile. Right then, when the words silently came out of my mouth, I knew he was not expecting it. He was smiling as well. We had a sort of formal interview and I honestly answered all his questions, mostly why’s. The news spread like magic just as the cliché goes, news has wings. I knew a lot were wondering, and perhaps assuming a lot of things. I, myself, was not expecting I would be resigning this soon. But I knew I have to. That feeling of excitement towards something you have been planning to do and yet it took you so many months to finally accomplish it. I saw my colleagues’ smiles along with their never-ending questions of why’s. Yes, it made me feel at ease when someone would just say, “You did the right thing!” because despite of the very fact that they don’t know what I am undergoing, they still managed to share some positive viewpoints which made me a lot more inspired to continue what I have just started.

Reasons Behind

Career and Studies – my priority as of the moment; oftentimes I am asked where would I go, will I join the famous newly established in Cebu but US based Fluor Daniel? Will I be in the very well known Keppel Singmarine? Will I go immediately to what they consider as the greener pasture Singapore? Neither. I am merely following my heart’s desire to finally enjoy and reap the fruits of my five-year hard-earned piece of parchment a.k.a. diploma and eventually, under God’s grace, learn more on how to further enhance His blessings. In fact, I won’t be enjoying a higher compensation but I will be indulging myself on a stressful paradigm which badly needs my time management more than I need it here. It is a great risk indeed. I will be getting out from my own comfort zone as I will have to race with a vast and widely established world outside, a lot different than what I have enjoyed here. I have fears and as far as my emotional health is concerned, I am still coping with such. I am simply hoping that with God’s help, everything will turn out just fine.

This is It!
I will be missing a lot of things here, a lot of people. My batch mates who eventually turned out to be my friends and confidante in all sorts of fun, giggles and sweet nothings, be it in the mail or during our bonding anywhere here. I will surely miss our kulitan, suntukan, hiyawan, kantsawan and every little thing we did. I will miss our dinner together in GY, Videoke, the breath-taking breeze in Toledo Baywalk which turned out to be one freaking experience with them, the batchoy moments during our first few months here, the birthday parties, the cakes and the surprises, the anniversary celebrations and most of all, the friendship I had with them. I will miss my teammates, my Onboard Mag family. I will miss writing articles. I will miss organizing dinners, get-togethers, valentine’s group dates, and outings. I will miss my room, my usual jogging. I will miss everything. My stay here taught me a lot of things. Life is an adventure, a race. I simply want to explore and find my happiness where I can race properly. I have no idea if I will make it to the finish line victorious, but one thing’s for sure, God is always there ready to embrace in whatever struggles I will be facing. With all the life’s principles and definitions, I would rather say that our existence matters not on what we have but how we feel. I am considering my TTSP experience, a detour, but a fruitful and adventurous one.

So long friends! God Bless! Ciao! XOXO

That was it. I think I was able to express my thoughts. Though my initial plan was to include some not-so-good observations but then, during the process of composing this, the angelic side of me prevailed. After sending my farewell speech to my selected colleagues, I received remarks such as:

1. Ais, di pa diay mi pwede muresign kay di pa mn mi kamao mubuhat ani.

2. Ais, quit engineering, pursue journalism. (toink, I know I'm not as gifted as Maria Ressa. hihi, oh well, we're engineers.. haha kidding, half meant :p)

heart-warming indeed and so, I can't just let time erase these mem'ries, and here I am blogging again for the very nth time.

I was actually searching for my old blogs when I realized that most of them I have already deactivated when I was on my job hunting mode way back a couple of years ago since I was planning not to leave a trace of my immature side in cyberspace in case my prospective employer would just google my name. I even tried googling my name then, I still do it now, to check if there are links that would lead my identity to any malicious and indecent cyber articles and the likes. But anyway, I still have my wordpress though and my old blogger which is filled with Daily Scriptures which is way back 2008, not so updated. I remember I made another blog a few months ago, I was still in TTSP that time and I wanted to pour out my observations but then I had to change my mind so instead of ranting, I only had a starter article and I think it was never followed with another post. I just couldn't remember the domain and even the add. tsk, an epic fail of me. But anyway, I only used it once, I might have deactivated it after all. I wanted to create another blog from my wordpress account but then something's always wrong. I might as well extend my patience and bear with my ojt experience blog and my blogthings collection in the mean time. Hopefully, this will be my constant abode here in the blogger world.

Recalling my TTSP days

2011-10-27T19:54:00.000+08:00

Why the title. the ice. and breaking it. Yes, I miss hearing the name. For almost a month now I haven't heard anyone calling me with such - icc, ice. I miss my former company, nevertheless, I am not remorseful with my choices. Today, I realized how blessed I am for having stayed in TTSP even for a short period of time. My former job showed me that no journey is easy. and choosing which burden you would rather joyfully carry matters a lot.

Recalling back, I can still imagine the Bravo Road. I have been used to arriving here every sunday night for my work every week. This has also been my running tracks for almost two years. I miss the place. I actually miss running here. I miss walking here alone after my overtime to buy my dinner outside. This road has also been a witness to my late night walks from gimiks, gatherings and baywalk leisure. And how can I forget the Tenshin Dormitory.

My comfort zone. The dorm is composed of 44 rooms with toilet and bath each, a small fridge where I store my bottle of red wine, fruits, yogurt, chocolates and milk and a 14' TV set with cable connection. Oh I must forgot, it is well ventilated and provided with an aircon. Basically, my daily routine was to wake up with my annoying alarm at 6:00am, hit the snooze a million times, and when the clock strikes 6:30, I have no choice, I have to get ready. It will take me almost 30 minutes to take a bath, 15minutes to change, and 15minutes to eat so that by 7:40, I am in my office cubicle doing some random preparation for the day. Most of the time, a few minutes is spent bonding with officemates.

Just like this. I so miss them.

The day would just pass simply spent on deliveries, repairs, owner's comments, sometimes, yard inspection-the so called Quality Patrol. That was my daily work routine. WAS. For several months I have been taught to strictly follow rules and regulations which are supposedly for the betterment of everyone, including the company itself.

I am supposed to write more but I need to continue what I am doing now.
So long! :)