Victoria's Secrets

Love, Love, Love...

2012-02-07T02:26:00.001+07:00

via liveinternet

I just had a chat with an old friend who happens to remain a good friend to me for the last 6-7 years now. It confirmed that I would likely to end up marrying a friend, someone I'm feeling most comfortable with. I am just a fool in front of new people, especially those whose faces I like. I can be more like myself when I get to know people better, therefore they became a friend.

I do have a lot of guy friends, tho. But none of them are on my list for a future husband. Oh, I got one name, actually, but he refused me so it brought me back to zero on my list. Well, still no hope for love life for now so I'll just concentrate on other things... like giving consultation to my aunt.

So she's depressed now because of the divorce and the condition of her family, so I tried my best to be all ears and gave her some inputs in the end. Of all the things I've been thru, it happened that I've experienced much more heartbreaks and sufferings than she had, and all of the lessons were what I shared with her today.

We all do fall in and out of love. It is all human and it is all fair. God works in such an amazing yet mysterious way that we human can never keep up with His plan. But we can try to think Godly, in order to make our miserable lives feel at least bearable. When we think humanly, we are trapped in the box where everything else seems like dead-ends.

When we think Godly, we are forced to go out of the box and see things from the outside, analyzing each of our problems from the eyes of third party who has the best view of all. We use our logics more here, being objective on seeing the larger picture. Once we understand how God plan works on, we are for sure heading to a happier state of mind.

People comes and goes in our lives and keeping one who aren't meant to be with us is such a self-destruction thing to do. A quote I spotted today in twitter said that we "can not lose what you never had, can not keep what is not yours, can not hold on to something that does not want to stay"--which are true.

Sometimes our feeling overruled our brain, causing us so much trouble in 'feeling' that we own certain people and refusing ourselves to believe in the fact that they are actually never ours. We hold on too much on the feelings when they are not real and it is such a foolish thing to do.

But me as a Piscean and my aunt as a Cancer, we are the slaves of love. I can not blame my aunt for being so weak toward her feelings, but I myself had learned that it isn't the thing that can keep us going on. God, family, friends and job are the ones. Love comes and goes, broken all the same (to quote The Magic Number's song).

I had been a fool myself, but stuff happened and I survived and I am simply stronger now and not gonna come back to where I started. Things are going to be much harder and complicated for me now, for I don't fall in love way too easily like before, but I know God will keep me alive by granting me family and friends who love me so much. I will survive, and I know, love will, too ;)

Here is the song I've been listening to over and over again since last night. I hope you don't get bored with this..

	The Magic Numbers - Love's A Game .mp3

	Found at bee mp3 search engine

Out Of Body Experience

2012-02-06T02:58:00.001+07:00

via thenewwriters

No, I didn't really experienced it. I just dreamt about it but it felt just so real. Last night, I went to sleep at about 3.30 a.m. after Ryan and Tio dropped me home from Beer Garden Kemang (and super late supper at KFC). I dunno how but I dreamt about my own death. I can not be too specific nor chronologically since this was a dream. I try my best to retell it here.

So there was my gravestone made of beautiful dark marble that was carved exquisitely. I saw my sister visited it with her friend, but my soul was already going another way, together with my late father and my late uncle Gerald (Daddy's oldest brother.) I was feeling so serene, and things were very white and shiny at the moment.

I couldn't really recall what happened there, but I remember clearly how peaceful I was then. I could see another friend of my brother's was coming and encountered with me--which is weird since I was dead by the time. I can't remember anything else from the dream, because it went on to another scene with my latest ex in it.

I was wondering if I was thinking about my father earlier before I slept last night, but couldn't remember anything about it. About my ex, I guess it was because I met a cute guy at Beer Garden whose eyes reminded me of my ex's when he stared at me. I think it went on with my subconscious mind so my ex appeared in my dream instead.

Anyway, they said dream about death could mean a 'rebirth' to the person, some kind of 'new life' that is beginning, a sign that a phase of life is just passed thru and a new one is ready to be entered. This blog tells that dreams of death can mean transition, loss and change (but can also be related to some guilt). I guess it's kinda related with what I was told earlier.

Well, I really do hope it's a good thing that I was dead in my dream last night. I really do hope for some changes in my life, and I hope it will turn out for something good. I hope the things I'd been working on for the last 4-5 months will finally bring out some good results. I hope my dreams can really come true soon ;)

Oh I Could Die!

2012-02-06T00:53:00.002+07:00

Check these newcomers on my playlist!

1. Smoking Popes - Need You Around

2. Thom Yorke - Hearing Damage

3. Röyksopp - Remind Me

4. Rock Kills Kid - I Turn My Camera On

5. Snoop Dogg, Wiz Khalifa ft. Bruno Mars - Young Wild & Free

Love Is Just A Game

2012-02-05T23:47:00.002+07:00

The Magic Numbers

Oh, maybe I think maybe I don't
Maybe I will maybe I won't
Find my way this time
I hear you're calling me soon

One of these days
Some of these days, and somebody pays
It happens all the time
I'll be leaving, believing you wanted me to

And maybe I'm a fool for walking in line
And maybe I should've tried to leave this time
I'm an honest mistake that you made
Did you mean to?
Did you mean?
Oh, did you mean?

Love is just a game
Broken all the same
And I will get over you
Love is just a lie
Happens all the time
Swear I know this much is true

Oh, and they coloured you up
They coloured you down, they coloured you in
And I've been waiting so long
To take you home

And maybe I think, maybe I don't
Maybe I will, maybe I won't
Find my way tonight
But I hear you're calling me soon

And maybe I'm a fool for walking in line
And maybe I should have tried to leave this time
I'm an honest mistake that you made
Did you mean to?
Did you mean?
Oh, did you mean?

Love is just a game
Broken all the same
And I will get over you
Love is just a lie
Happens all the time
Swear I know this much is true

And maybe I'm a fool for walking in line
And maybe I should've tried to leave this time
I'm an honest mistake that you made
Did you mean to?
Did you mean?
Oh, did you mean?

Love is just a game
Broken all the same
And I will get over you
Love is just a lie
Happens all the time
Swear I know this much is true

Got the title and singer of this song last night from Ryan 'Iyank' and googled it. Love this!

My Week Update

2012-02-05T17:28:00.001+07:00

[Anggi, Tio, me, Ryan, Adhe, Cheryl, Tika, Agatha and Hanif]

I really am not an expert in making first connection with strangers. For the last couple of weeks in Jakarta, Cheryl and I had been in various new places with various new friends, but all I can do is talking with someone I already knew, or had been introduced earlier. I am very very poor in getting into a stranger, which is what I need the most in getting more guys on my friend list.

Last night we went to Beer Garden Kemang. Four girls were me, Cheryl, Agatha and Tika--and four guys of Ryan (my Binus schoolmate), Tio, Adhe and Hanif. Anggi, their friend, came after but only for a while. The eight of us were chatting and laughing but still, we need to find guys who aren't in our friend zone. There were some cute ones, but then again, I am so not an expert in talking with strangers. What a shame that I missed those guys just like that! LOL.

We went to Blowfish the night before by the way. I was with my aunt and cousin, while Cheryl was with Agatha and their friends. It was my first time there (I love the interior designs!) and met some new guys there (surely they are friends of my girls). Only, this time the guy is 8 years YOUNGER than me! God please just kill me! LOL.

Well there aren't too much to say these days. My life is kinda boring while waiting for the stuff I prepare for June/July. I am currently supervising the renovation of my aunt's house and gonna stay here in South Jakarta for a while until the project is done. South Jakarta is like the best area I love in Indonesia, in the 'city' category.

I am still in search of my prince charming on the white horse--which is near to impossible to get now, but I'm taking things easily, knowing that he'll come anyway. I think a person like me will likely to end up marrying a best friend, not some random people I barely know, because I feel comfortable most with those whom I knew for some time. Well, my friends told me to have fun so that's what I am doing lately. Having fun with my girls and friends.. :)

Garth + Meilina

2012-02-02T20:09:00.000+07:00

[garth + meilina wedding web]

Oh how forgetful I am! It is my schoolmate's wedding day today and I missed it. I was just totally forgot! However, Garth's master skill on web designing is truly shown here on the website. I love everything about this invitation (except that I was forgetting it) maybe I'll have this kind of invitation myself for my wedding one day. One day. LOL.

Happy Wedding to Garth + Meilina,

wish you guys a happy start of your brand new life!

Bros Before Hos

2012-01-31T00:17:00.000+07:00

[Judy, Cheryl and me at Beer Garden SCBD]

Mom had been complaining about this from a long time. My family said that I value friendship more than I'm supposed to. My brother said I always talk about my friends but never talk about myself. Well, after I think about that, I think it's true. I've been hiding behind my friends to hide myself.

Like last night when Judy and Cheryl asked me to come out late at about 10 p.m. After a small argue with Mom, I left home and speeding up to meet my girls, because I failed to meet them the night before. I went to Beer Garden SCBD, then moved to the 365 Eco Bar in Kemang for them and had some catching ups for Judy is living in Tasikmalaya and we had so much to talk about.

I guess it all came from when in junior high, there were moments when I got absolutely no friends at all. I appreciate and value every friendship offered highly ever since, being nice to every friend I have because I know how it is to have no friend. I think I need to concentrate more on me, not them.

For my last experience, Cheryl had been the angel who was sent at the lowest point of my relationship with my last boyfriend. She is now the best of my friends ever, who gradually teached me how to have fun and laugh again, who fixed me out without she ever notices. I am pulled back from the scattered pieces because of her, and that's why she stays in my heart.

I dunno what I would do without my friends, so I try to give as much for them in return, knowing that everybody needs a friend at some point of their lives. Cheryl never knew how her invitation to meet up that night on February 2012 had been her first help of my therapy and I just realized how her small hello can lasts long in my heart.

I would never know how I'd help someone by giving my friendship, so I'd just give it. That is why I always try my best to be a friend to everyone. I do not want anyone to feel rejected and so alone. Everyone in this world has to know, that they have angels taking care of them in form of a friend. ;)

Girls' Night Out

2012-01-28T15:51:00.001+07:00

[me, adi, cheryl, agatha and eko]

We were supposed to go to Judy's birthday feast last night, but it was cancelled due to the heavy traffic she was having all day on the way to Jakarta. The workers of many factories were having a demonstration all over the toll road (read it here). So she was super tired when she finally got to Jakarta and cancelled the plan. But I was still coming to get Agatha and Cheryl anyway at around 10 p.m.

[people went hilarious when they see me on stage. my girls never saw me being so crazy in the club. i thought i'd left that one far away behind but apparently it's still there and coming back to me. lol.]

So we dressed up and waited for Winnie, then headed to Barcode at La Codefin to meet with Mia, Melinda and Tasya. They are Agatha's friends. We were there for just half hour, then headed to Senayan City for the Domain. There, we met Rudi and his friends Michael 'Ekong', Adi, Dewa, Eko and others. Those whom I met in Sobbers last week.

[me and adi on the left. then dewa, me, agatha and michael]

I also asked Audie and Tyo--friends of Ryan 'Iyank' whom I met in Bandung when they visited last month--to come, so they came with Adhe, made our group merrier. So we stayed there till around 4.20 a.m. and went home tired, sleepy and smelled cigarette smoke. I hate that, but I love the fun I had all the night with the best girls in the world! Thank God for ever giving me them ;)

Chinese New Year

2012-01-24T00:07:00.000+07:00

So Ben, Mom and I went to Jakarta last night and stayed over at Cipete. Today we went to Joglo at midday and met the family for lunch. We were gathered there to have a family prayer, together with Oma Magda and Oma Martha's family, my grandma's sisters I rarely met. We actually never celebrate the Chinese new year, but in order to respect the elders, we were dressed in red. Well, most of us were.

At about 5 p.m. Bobby and Rachelle picked me up and we headed to PIM. We had dinner and some window shopping there, then moved to Sinou Kaffee Hausen at Panglima Polim to chill. It had been more than two months since I last met Rachelle, so it was really great to see her again and catch up with a lot of stuff. Thank God for granting me such great friends both in Bandung and Jakarta. I am so much blessed for that! :)

Oh, and Happy Lunar New Year to all who celebrate!
May we all have a prosperous year ahead! GBU all!!

Perfect Weekend

2012-01-23T00:41:00.000+07:00

Yesterday was a very busy day for us. Mom was the wedding organizer for Michell and Sisca's wedding so she got busy from the very morning. I went to Cathedral for the holy matrimony at midday and met the family of both sides. Michell's family is already a family to us, living as our neighbor and his mother is Mom's best friend.

I've been to many of their family parties so I know his cousins Angelo, Joshua, Chilla and other pretty well. While Sisca, being another senior at my junior high, is sister to Ben's classmate, Eric. So Eric and I had some conversation too after the mass.

I went to Riau Junction to meet Esther and her kids. We bartered stuff we meant to give to each other and stayed for a cup of coffee before I went home at 3 p.m. There were already two cars of guests waiting for me for I wasn't informed that they were coming at that hour. The guests are Michell's family from his mother's side. So I hosted them for the next two hours and spent the last one for dressing up.

I wore my green mint-chocolate brown kebaya and did very little to my hair, then went to Maria's house at 6.30 p.m. after the group of Michell's family went to the wedding reception. I wasn't going to that party because I was invited to another wedding of Chika and Luki at Bumi Sangkuriang. So after about 2 hours of helping Maria got ready, Sally came and we were ready to go--we the girls with Ucok and Chris.

We arrived at the reception at almost 9 p.m. but the parking was still full and there was still food left. We met a lot of old friends, from high school to neighbors I rarely meet, all were lovely people I loved to meet with. I met Luppi, Ryan, Aldy and wife, Nugi, Vanny, Reggy (Chika's cousin) and few of St. Aloysius fellows.

We all left the venue at about 11 p.m. and went to Maria's house to change dresses. Then Maria and I continued the night to Sobbers, where Rian, Pritty, Erwin and Fahmy were already there. Along the night, Agatha, Stanny, Winnie, Ajie, Nugi, Patrick, Osit and others joined us to party till about 4 a.m.

There were also Dipo and Odie, and also a group of the guys I met in Domain two weeks ago: Michael, Adi, Rizky, Dewa, Esa, etc. They were at Maya and Kiki's tables, also with Chika, Ucup and Yeye. These are all the names that I remember--there were so many more in the groups I met, not to include the Salute Bar group in another regular table...

By the way the night went on and I got home at around 4.45 a.m. after dropping Maria home. It was like the most perfect weekend I ever had for the last couple of months, perhaps because almost "everybody" was there in Sobbers and I met many others at Chika's wedding.. It just felt perfect!

Oh, maybe it's because finally my BFFs Maria and Cheryl finally met and know each other last night. Dunno. It was just feels so perfect to me... and I spent more than four hours of nap today to get reenergized. Thank God!

P.S. Pictures are to be uploaded soon.

Meet Old Friends

2012-01-19T01:11:00.002+07:00

I went to PVJ this afternoon to meet Tante Selly, an old schoolmate in the interior design school. She was with her colleague Zaki and our other schoolmate, Vincent. It had been years since I last met Tante Selly and Vincent (before meeting Vincent two months ago) so it was a very nice reunion we had.

We walked around the mall for a while, shopping jackets for both Tante Selly and Zaki, then after the guys went home, Tante Selly and I had dinner at Black Canyon again, but this time it was just the two of us.

On the way home, I visited Sapulidi, after abandoning the place for almost a month now. It's just weird that I went there almost everyday during late November to early December and never go there again now. So I said hi to the crews there and got home before midnight. I even sang three songs on stage with Kanggep's jazz band there. It was really fun!

Tumblr-ing

2012-01-18T16:17:00.000+07:00

I am re-activating my Tumblr account and gonna start quoting there instead of at my Quotes blog. You can still find my old quotes at the old blog, but find the new, fresh ones in Tumblr. It's the minimalist me there. Enjoy!

Mint Love

2012-01-17T23:02:00.000+07:00

My sister bought this mint nail polish and I'm loving it so much. It will so much match with my kebaya I'm gonna wear this weekend. So cute yet so fresh!

Submarine

2012-01-17T22:32:00.001+07:00

Another movie I got from my sister, this British movie is a worth-watching one. There's something about English flicks that made me loving it so much. It's just so much a refreshing after so many Hollywood's. Oh, and don't forget to listen to Alex Turner's sweet songs as its soundtrack!

Earliest 2012

2012-01-17T21:54:00.000+07:00

I'm so much into editing pictures, so here's my pictures with my family during our visit to Jakarta on the first weekend of 2012. We went to Foodism at Senayan City for dinner on the first Saturday of the year and tried Angel's new blue and yellow filters for camera lens. That was fun :)

Last Saturday Nite (TGIF)

2012-01-17T21:13:00.001+07:00

[theme song: Last Friday Night (TGIF) by Katy Perry]

Promised you to blog about this, so here's about last Saturday. I planned to stay home, but Maria and Agatha called me to go out, so at around 11 p.m. I drove to Erginn, found the place so full that I had to park on the main street cuz cars overwhelmed the parking space.

Agatha was already there with her schoolmate Anti (who happens to be my sister's schoolmate too--they went to the same elementary school) and Anti's friends. Maria came with Sally, her college friend who lives in Jakarta but was visiting for the wedding party she attended earlier.

We met Roro and Danis too somewhere in the crowd, but decided to accept the call from Rian to go to Sobbers. We parked the other cars at Agatha's house then went to Sobbers by my car. We then met Rian and El there, who were attending the occasion of their friend Fahmy's birthday. There was also Erwin their friend, and we met other friends there.

It was superfun to me, to be compared to my last party at Domain, Jakarta, where I got introduced to that "pathetic low guy" I blogged about before. Things got out of control a little bit and we ended up staying out till 5 a.m.--us four girls and the four guys we just met plus Ryan our friend--but I say this was a very fun night. I hope more like this are to come :)

Someday...

2012-01-17T20:59:00.001+07:00

Someday you'll gonna realizeOne day you'll see this through my eyesBut then i won't even be thereI'll be happy somewhereEven if i can't

I knowYou don't really see my worthYou think you're the last guy on earthWell I've got news for youI know I'm not that strongBut it won't take longWon't take long

Chorus

Coz someday, someone's gonna love meThe way, i wanted you to need meSomeday, someone's gonna take your placeOne day I'll forget about youYou'll see, i won't even miss youSomeday, someday

But nowI know you can't tellI'm down, and I'm not doing wellBut one day these tearsThey will all run dryI won't have to crySweet goodbye

Chorus

Coz someday, someone's gonna love meThe way, i wanted you to need meSomeday, someone's gonna take your place wo oh ohOne day I'll forget about youYou'll see, i won't even miss youSomeday,

I know someone's gonna be thereSomeday, someone's gonna love meThe way, i wanted you to need meSomeday, someone's gonna take your placeOne day I'll forget about youYou'll see, i won't even miss yousomeday, somedayoh yeah yeah

End Rape!

2012-01-17T19:08:00.000+07:00

via half-heartedly

Mom on Kebaya

2012-01-17T01:30:00.000+07:00

This is Mom and Tante Astrid, ready to go to a Javanese wedding party last Saturday. I didn't go with them, I just made sure Mom was doing great and took picture of them before they left. But hours later, I sneaked out and threw myself to a small party (that gone wild, I'll post about it next) with my girl friends at Erginn. Well, I think I'm gonna cherish these pictures cuz Mom looks really great on those!

Clarins Product

2012-01-16T15:37:00.000+07:00

I won some online contest from Clarins last month and got this package of one lipstick and one UV protection gel as the prize today. I had never tried this product, so it's good to have them for free. Maybe you can all try liking the fanpage and can get some free giveaway too! Who knows ;)

Some English Lesson

2012-01-14T13:59:00.001+07:00

via 9gag

My Movie List

2012-01-14T01:59:00.000+07:00

I got these titles mostly from my sister, and watched the last one on HBO today. I say they are all great touching movies and I like all of them. The quirkiness of the first three is fantastic, and except for no.2 and no.3, they were based on novels. I highly recommend you guys to watch these!

1. Up In The Air

The movie is about the life of a motivation speaker who does a lot of traveling without burdens. His life is spent mostly on the air and airports that he doesn't have a 'real life'.

2. The Kids Are All Right

Ever imagine how a life with gay moms? These two kids wondered about their biological father, whose sperm was the donor to each of their moms. In the end of the day, it's still a family thing.

3. The Art Of Getting By

A kid was aware about the emptiness of life, that everybody will eventually be dead, and that's when he found a girl who change his perspective and began to enjoy life.

4. One Day

I personally love this movie for its tragic drama. Love between best friends over 20 years, this epic story is packaged in an unusual way, telling the love on only one specific day of each years.

5. Sundays at Tiffany's

There ain't no such a perfect guy, except in fairy tales... and your own imagination. But what if this special imaginary friend comes alive? Would you choose your 'real' fiancé or the one from your mind?

Choosing Religion

2012-01-13T01:57:00.001+07:00

via facebook

Got this image from facebook, but forgot who posted it. This really shouldn't be the guideline for you to choose a religion, but it's pretty much a fun way to classified all those spiritual thingy these days. Don't get offended, this is just for fun!

Oh, by the way, I was directed straightly to the boring generic Christian. Well, I guess I am. Lol.

Hilarious Coincidence

2012-01-13T01:53:00.000+07:00

via lh4

This is one hilarious thing that keeps me and Maria laughing every time we remember it. So last week I went to Jakarta and got introduced to a guy, let's call him MK. So we danced at the club and he ended up driving me and Cheryl back to Winnie's place where we stayed over.

Last night, I told Maria about all of the story about this guy and showed her his picture I got from the BBM Contact List. Maria got all hysterically laughed when she saw him and there she went, blew up all of the story about him.

So this very same guy who was hitting on me last weekend was the same guy who tried to hook up with Maria but turned her down when they finally met. I mean, how on earth could a guy commenting on girl's acne and the salon she's having facial at? Is it really guy's business which salon she's going to? And what's with thin body and dark skin?

Really, should a girl get a whitening injection JUST for a guy who can not accept her the way she is?

I think this guy had hit the limit way too far and he sounds so ridiculous to me. If he doesn't want her, just leave. Bullshitting any girl with sweet words and woos on skype and commenting on physical matter when finally meet in flesh is certainly uncool.

Today, Maria twitted "I wonder wat u gonna do when u know tat a gal tat u were hitting on is my bff! Hahaha.. U r such a desperate player! Keep flirting around.." and he, whether it's incidentally or not (but we suspect it to be in purpose) twitted "I already knew, that's why I stop."

Okay, too much drama here now!

But then again, it's good that he knew. I could tolerate nothing more from that guy actually, after being too straightforward only a couple hours after we were being introduced to each other. I mean, come on, I wouldn't mind a kiss when there's a mutual feeling being shared. But stealing kisses from someone you just met who were drunk? Come on man, that's just low!

I am wondering if there are many guys like this one around. Makes the world a scarier place for girls like me and Maria--and many other single girls in this whole world, I believe. I just wish that this case would stop this MK guy from hitting on girls randomly, especially with that low kind of attitude he had shown to both me and Maria. Tho they were different actions, still it showed to us how pathetic he really is.

I am so glad he doesn't bothering me with any chat no more, being aware that he was not in a condition to do such things anymore, perhaps feeling stupid when he found out that Maria is my bestie. Well, I hope more boys are using their head and manners better, for this world is already lacking of men in number, leave alone gentlemen. Lol. I hope this guy gets the lesson well ;)

Some Useful Tips

2012-01-12T12:07:00.012+07:00

via 9gag