It's A Blog..

Sigh :(

noreply@blogger.com (Gary | JC) — Mon, 12 Mar 2012 16:48:00 +0000

Sigh... 1 word, sad ;(

Everytimes I look at you.

noreply@blogger.com (Gary | JC) — Sun, 11 Mar 2012 20:21:00 +0000

It's been awhile I didn't write here. Been busy some stuff and not feeling well for so long ! So tomorrow gonna go Ipoh for some work, hope it'll be great. So today is March 12 and guess what ? 4 more days gonna be xiaofang birthday :) I wish I could celebrate with her. I just prepared something for her just now, hope she'll like it. I'd been doing it for a long time and choose the best out of all. Just now I'm on Facebook and I saw she updated her picture. I feel happy and sad at the same time, haha. Everytime I look at your picture, I had this feeling all the time. It's coming out from my heart. The happy things is she rarely take a picture of herself so now she got a new picture, I could get to see her :) and the sad things is she's not belong to me :( hope she's fine and happy there. Hopefully I could wait her back to me :)

One more thing, you look beautiful and sweet in that picture :) <3

Rest in peace Whitney Houston.

noreply@blogger.com (Gary | JC) — Sun, 12 Feb 2012 21:25:00 +0000

My mom told me that Hollywood singer had passed away yesterday and is a negro. I thought is someone who are not really got fame there. But when I read the news, it's Whitney Houston. She's just 48 this year, she has the most incredible voice of all the female singer and also so called "Queen of Pop". The cause of the death still unknown, it's just like Michael Jackson. All the legend are getting decease one by one, what if they all gone ? Don't tell me to listen to those kids yelling around as Justin Bieber, Selina Gomez, Rebecca black, and others newbie. I rather listen to old song. It's a sad case for Whitney Houston with all the sudden. May you rest in peace. I will allllllllwayyyssss............. Love youuuuuuuuuuuu..............

XF,
If you're not happy or something happen, you can direct tell me, text me or call me. Suddenly you text me with the sad face, I know something you're feeling sad or hurt. But if you don't wanna say now, it's okay. When the time is right, you can tell me. I'm always here. :)

Hehe :)

noreply@blogger.com (Gary | JC) — Fri, 10 Feb 2012 18:15:00 +0000

I'm happy. :)

I should never let you go.

noreply@blogger.com (Gary | JC) — Thu, 09 Feb 2012 19:34:00 +0000

I'm sorry to you. I just hope for a second chance from you, I wanted to spend my entire life with you, love you, take care you, care about you, make you smile everyday. I take you as my wife. Hope you'll give me a chance.

I dont know what else to say.

noreply@blogger.com (Gary | JC) — Tue, 07 Feb 2012 16:56:00 +0000

I still love you xf, that'll never change,
Think about you every day, we just could never get it together.
Hey, wish there was a better way, for me to say it,
But I swear on everything, I'd do anything for you on any day.
There are just too many things, to explain, when it rains,
Guess it pours, yes it does, wish there wasn't any pain.
But I can't pretend there ain't, I ain't placin' any blame,
I ain't pointin' fingers, heaven knows i've never been a saint.
I know it just feels like we just pissed away our history,
But today, I looked at your picture, almost if to say,
I miss you self consciously, wish it didn't end this way.
But I just had to get away, don't know why,
I don't know what else to say, I guess I'm...

Valentine.

noreply@blogger.com (Gary | JC) — Sun, 05 Feb 2012 21:42:00 +0000

Valentine is about getting nearer. Another single lonely night for this year I guess. But I still wanna wish you happy valentine day. I don't know I should text you or not cause you like reply me awhile then stop le. If I spam, I'm afraid you'll fed up so I stop. :(

What can I do ?

noreply@blogger.com (Gary | JC) — Thu, 02 Feb 2012 19:15:00 +0000

I feel likes she don't wanna text with me :( she only reply me 5 times. Sigh. <\3 maybe she's tired or busy with her work. I really wanna have a talk with her. Hope she get in poly too. Now I don't know how, I thought she had iPhone d maybe we could have more time to chat but it looks like the same. :(

If ...

noreply@blogger.com (Gary | JC) — Wed, 01 Feb 2012 21:03:00 +0000

If I got you, I think I'd fulfill my dream, wishes, everything. The only things I need to do is earn money, come back home eat dinner, give you a better life, bring you travel around the world along, accompany you the rest of my life, and take care ours kids. The next girl I love will be our daughter. <3

Sharing.

noreply@blogger.com (Gary | JC) — Wed, 01 Feb 2012 19:28:00 +0000

This year a lot of people talks about sharing. Almost everyday we share about our life, love, sadness, money, happiness, friends and etc. Kinda happy after sharing my own problem to them, I feel like "so light" no more bundle on my shoulder. I think we should share your life with your friends cause without knowing, actually your friends are facing the same problem too. So they could give some advice for us. I do sharing with 2-3 friends only, never tried to do sharing with girls before. Most of my friends we knew since we were small and we're close so we could share all our secret together. I love to do sharing but hardly get a person to share my problem with. But I'm really happy to share with her if she finds me and talk to me. Even in phone, I'm happy enough. It's February month and valentine is near ! But she's with her boyfriend, so it's not good to buy things and mail to her. I'm afraid that later will cause her and her boyfriend had some complicated issue so I guess I just wish her. Hope she could be my valentine but I think only in my dream. Because she didn't talk to me. I don't know how to add her in line apps and whatsapp, I can't find her in that apps so all I can do is wait her add me. I'd told her to add me but he haven't add yet so I guess I just wait for her, give her some time. Maybe she's busy with work, family, or other things. Wish her luck here. Good luck. :)

Chinese New Year 2012

noreply@blogger.com (Gary | JC) — Mon, 30 Jan 2012 07:39:00 +0000

Happy Chinese New Year everyone, this year CNY still Okok la but at least our gathering around 30+ ppl everynight who always made something happening. This year I only got 5 Ang Pau, I didn't go to my relative house too. So everyday hang out with my friends, some of them from KL and Singapore so we can hardly get all together. Everytime we get along, the only things we do is laugh. I hope this year I can have her back so next year CNY I could bring her out along my friends :) I'm waiting her to add me, hope she'll talk back to me.

The first night gathering picture.

A guy express his love to the girl she love but is too late.

noreply@blogger.com (Gary | JC) — Fri, 20 Jan 2012 16:39:00 +0000

I read a story from somewhere, it's a guy who express his love on a tv show. He'd fell in love with a girl for 3 years but he did not tell the girl that he love her. He was afraid that the girl would keep away from him if he tell her that he love her. He did invite her out for dinner, she agreed but he didn't tell her that he love her. They just having their dinner and some chat. But no one will ever expect that she met an accident on the road and passed away last few weeks. No one knows what will happen tomorrow, he felt really regret that he didn't express his love to her. Whether she accept or reject, at least she know that there's someone who truthly love her wholehearted.I felt sorry for this guy and respect his braveness for sharing his story to everyone. He's telling the world appreciate your love one before it's too late. I do wanna tell her that but I don't have the guts to SMS and tell her since she's belong to someone else now. So I guess I'll just write here, I know we're far apart, I really do love you. If we could be back together, I'm willing to marry you as my beloved wife. I'm not looking for a girlfriend for about 2-3 months, I'm looking for a girl that I'm willing to spent my whole life with. You're the one who meant so much for me. I choose to write it here cause I'm afraid that she'll stay away from me, and I don't know what will happen to me tomorrow, next week, next month, etc. Cause I got to travel Alot. Hope she'll text me or talk to me if anything happen to her whether she's sad, frustrated, unhappy, etc.

Day 2

noreply@blogger.com (Gary | JC) — Thu, 19 Jan 2012 21:13:00 +0000

I'd waited the whole day for my friend to check the iPhone whether got stock or not so I could tell her. Finally my friend texted me at 1.53am so I SMS her about it. She told me that she's sick :( and still got to go for work tomorrow, I'm worry and don't feel good that she's suffering sick over there :( hope she'll get well tomorrow, god bless please. I'm very happy on the day she replied my text. Why ? Maybe I'll tell y'all next time :) I'm suffering serious headache these few days, really really bad. Let me just stop here today. And hope her sickness will get away from her later she wake up so she won't be suffer at work and the whole day. I'm willing to take her sickness away. :) remember to text me ! :/

Good day !

noreply@blogger.com (Gary | JC) — Wed, 18 Jan 2012 16:53:00 +0000

I guess today is a good day, I'm so happy that she SMS with me :) I just smile the whole day without any reason. Haha, insane fella. Okay, now should I SMS her everyday ? I don't know she'll reply me or not or thinks that I'm kinda annoying her. I really don't know how to start a conversation with her, I asked Alot of question to her today ! Maybe it's because for too long we didn't talk. I really wanna know more how are you going now, hope that you won't get mad at me for asking so much question. Actually still got Alot of things I wanna ask but I don't know how to ask, I'm afraid that you'll think that "this Gary ask so many things, argh !" hope tomorrow will be like today we could talk more. :) Good night (:

Reminiscing when we know each other.

noreply@blogger.com (Gary | JC) — Fri, 13 Jan 2012 19:43:00 +0000

It's 2.57am now, I'm lying on my bed now. Kinda tired and sleepy, suddenly I recall everything about you. Haha, about how we get to know each other, started to SMS, how we get started, and I still remember the date and what I'm doing when you SMS told me that :D after that, I received my first birthday present from you ! I'm so happy, haha. I remember I was sleepy at that time, my housemate take the parcel and come to my room, "Gary, wake up ! Your parcel from Singapore." I wake up and think who do I know in Singapore ? When I saw your name at the back, I jump on my bed ! I'm so happy and touch at that time, until now everytime I recall, I always smile :) I SMS say thank you and I love you, at that time I really really really wanna hug you until a lil bit tears come out from my eyes. I still keeping everything, the envelop, the box and the watch nicely. It's beside me now :) I wanna write it down here so maybe you'll see this post. I don't know whether you still read my blog or not but if you wanted to text me, just text me. I'll be waiting :) I still remember your voice that I first time called you, actually it's only 1 time. I remember everyword you said. I'm sorry to you that the promise I made to you 3 years ago, that I'll go Singapore get a job so we can be together everyday, I don't know you still remember or not. This year is the 3rd year, I really didn't mean to break this promise but I don't know you still want this promise to be fulfill or not. Nevermind, hope you got a good result in school so you could further your study. Good luck. G

Merry Xmas and Happy 2012 xf :)

noreply@blogger.com (Gary | JC) — Mon, 09 Jan 2012 21:17:00 +0000

Gonna make a short post here since I'd post some in my Tumblr. I didn't wish you Merry Christmas and Happy New Year last year cause I feels like it's better for you since you're taken. I don't know you're having a good happily life or not over there but all I could do is stalk a lil bit at your Tumblr, see how's your day and feeling. That's all I could do here. I feel bad if I kept like want you back from your bf, it's like snatching away from him plus I don't know whether you're happy or not having him so I guess I just keep silence here. Let it be, if you're down or need someone to talk, I'm here :) because I believe if the things is yours, no matter what happen, it'll come back to you. Thats what I believe. Just passing by to let you know that I still care about you. See ya :) Oh ya, Merry Christmas and Happy New Year to you. Wish you have a beautiful year. Sorry I'm late.

:')

noreply@blogger.com (Gary | JC) — Tue, 13 Sep 2011 04:45:00 +0000

I can see she's doing very well with her new Bf there. :) so I guess I'll just wish her from here. It's hard to get the feeling out but I guess alcohol could help me so I won't be that hard when I'm abit dizzy. Now all I could do is work hard for money, so I could fly to KL or sg to meet my buddy whenever I want. I don't feels like writing anymore. Anything, text me. K bye

Weird feeling like happy or unhappy.

noreply@blogger.com (Gary | JC) — Fri, 15 Apr 2011 18:41:00 +0000

I had a weird feeling since that day you talk to me. I really wanted to say something to you but I just don't know how to open my mouth. I wanted to ask you to give me a chance but it looks like not that good. It's like I'm asking you to break up an come with me. You know what I'm saying ? All I could do is accompany you whenever you need someone to accompany you. I'm here for you 24/7. If you're down, I'll be down with you and raise you up. Even if the whole world lie to you, I'll be with you with all the truth. Because I'd lost you once, if you really give me a chance to get you back. I'll never ever lost you again. I'll grab you tightly, I won't loosen you again. Now all I could do is wait here and let the time talk. I'm waiting and I love you.

I rather ride alone.

noreply@blogger.com (Gary | JC) — Fri, 08 Apr 2011 16:27:00 +0000

I'm done with this shit ! I'm not the eldest nor the youngest son here but I had to take all the shit responsibility on my own. They two good of nothing except making trouble then I had to settle it for them. I ain't own no nothing to this two motherfuckers ! I'd enough with all this bullshit ! I'm not gonna show any mercy to this two motherfuckers ! Me and my dad were trying hard out there to make money, asking people to help scholarship, plus everything for this family. Came back home, I can't even relax go look for my friends ? Plus you mom, not only helping to solve problem, you keep fuck me and dad for fucks ? You just sitting at home, go out chat, at home talk on phone. Don't think I don't know who you're talking to on the phone. Don't force me, everything I wanted to do you keep stopping me. Why ? I'm not killing people, rob a bank, rape people, take drug. Go meet friends drink tea and have a chit chat also can't ? Fuck you then ! I'm mad as fuck now ! You better keep your mouth shut and don't raise my heat up. I don't want to split vulgar and talk out loud with you. Compare to others family here, I'm consider Alot better than others that don't speak vulgar with family and be SO patient. Please understand that everyone have their limit. All these years, I never heard anything good from you except saying all the disappointed words. I'd used to it and I never request any shit. I know what to do next time. Just let the time flow by and watch me. Fuck the brothers I ride alone !

I'm thinking of you.

noreply@blogger.com (Gary | JC) — Sat, 02 Apr 2011 17:32:00 +0000

XF, actually I still miss you here. I would really like to hear from you everyday. How are you ? What you're doing ? Anything makes you unhappy or not ? Everything but, I don't know how to do it. Really don't know how because you got a Bf now and I know it's not very good to, you know what I mean ? I kept dream about you, but yesterday was the most happy one. I dream that we're getting married. I fetch you from your house, then we head to our wedding dinner, and I'm on stage with you and a lot more. I'm very very happy on that night. But I don't know if you will read this or not, I don't know you will think that I'm crazy or what. I'm fine here, I'll wait for you to give me 1 more chance. I know there's a lot of girls out there but you're the only one I'm loving because you are the realest. I hope you'll talk to me. I'll wait for you.

noreply@blogger.com (Gary | JC) — Thu, 06 Jan 2011 21:30:00 +0000

Sometimes I just feel like I'm so lifeless. Most of the things don't go the way I planned. Is there out of thing world got someone feeling like me ? Facing all this shit. Shit, never know what will happen in the future. Everyday just struggling but what can I do ? Something I feels like wanna have someone by my side. Only ciggs accompany me anywhere anytime. Because I don't want to see too clear in this world, because it's too much brats out there. Don't feels like blogging also. Take a break fella.

Love hurts.

noreply@blogger.com (Gary | JC) — Tue, 28 Dec 2010 19:53:00 +0000

Love hurts, how's the hurt feeling y'all felt before ? Is it the same as mine ? :(
I don't know how to describe. I just know it's bad. I can't focus on my meeting, can't smile, heart feel bad, etc. I saw something I shouldn't see, it makes me wonder whats happening out there. So should I still wait for just let it go ? I'm blur. I need someone here to be myside but no one here. Maybe because all friend of mine were boys which full of craps that's why don't talk about feeling shit. Talk about love with them ? I rather talk to my dog. Although my dog won't reply me but she'll keep quite and stay by me and accompany me. Seriously, no one know what I'm thinking because I don't share my shit with other people. Some may thinks it's stupid, some may think it's bored, some may just ignore it. So I prefer blog it eventhough no one read my blog, I'll take it as my dairy and a place to let me write my feeling. Well, everyday I saw girls are crying out there because of her boyfriend, love, this and that. Why those girl still love them ? Some said "I'm already single", not even a week, she's in relationship again, then not even a month. Single back. Is that fun ? I just a to be loved. Simple because I'm stress enough and I needed someone to talk and can make my day. I don't care if she's far from here because I plan to marry her so we got a long time future to be together. Is okay that we can barely met, but now it's too late I think ? All I can do is W.A.I.T ? Or what else I can do ? I hope she listen a song by Bruno Mars - Grenade which I would sing for ya, I'll catch a grenade for ya, throw my hand on a blade for ya, I'll jump infront of a train for ya, I'll do anything for ya.

Lonely Christmas.

noreply@blogger.com (Gary | JC) — Fri, 24 Dec 2010 18:58:00 +0000

I wanted to blog very long ago but due to the busyness and tiring, I got no time to blog. Sorry about that. Guess what ? It's Christmas today, I wish y'all Merry Christmas and have a nice night, especially to her. Although I don't know how is she over there but I'm still wishing her have a Merry Christmas and happy over there. I'll write about what I wanted to write pass few weeks ago. I wish she was here with me, I always dream about her that she were beside me always but I know it was just a dream. Will I get one more chance ? Will she willing give me another chance ? I don't know but hopefully that she will give la. I'm still wondering always how is she over there. Having life happily or what but I hope she had a nice day always. Pass few days ago, got a guy name Alviss Kong who became famous in facebook about commit suicide because her girlfriend dump him. Who I call it stupid fella, if he really love her, why must commit suicide because she don't want you ? Why don't wait for her or make her happy always ? Such a dumbass fella, if really must commit suicide, I think I'm dead since 2 years ago. But I'm still waiting for her. Anyway, wish you a Merry Christmas Xiaofang, hope you have a nice day. :D

Happy Birthday to Gary 28/11

noreply@blogger.com (Gary | JC) — Sun, 28 Nov 2010 20:38:00 +0000

Happy birthday to you Gary !
This is the first time I'd receive so much birthday wishes. I would like to thank you all from the bottom of my heart. I do appreciate it very much and feel touch. I didn't celebrate my birthday just as usual every year, not really care about my birthday because use to it already. And my only wish is I wish that she would come back to me, I know these wishes things won't happen because since everything I'd wish for, never came true. Hope this one will came true. I didn't receive her wish, I don't know weather she had forgotten or she don't want to wish me, I ain't mad at her. Because it's normal, where got such a person insane like me ? Almost 2 years+ never keep in touch, still remember everything. Hah, I really hope that she'll choose me back and I hope when the first time I celebrate my birthday, I could spend together with her. That's my the only wish in life. I don't know i should be happy or sad for the truth. Anyways, depends on fate and let it judge by god birthday boy.

Love

noreply@blogger.com (Gary | JC) — Tue, 23 Nov 2010 06:22:00 +0000

I asked her to stay but she wouldn't listen
She left before I had the chance to say
Oh
The words that would mend the things that were broken

But now it's far too late, she's gone away

Every night you cry yourself to sleep
Thinking: "Why does this happen to me?
Why does every moment have to be so hard?"
Hard to believe that

It's not over tonight
Just give me one more chance to make it right
I may not make it through the night
I won't go home without you

The taste of your breath, I'll never get over
The noises that she made kept me awake
Oh
The weight of things that remained unspoken
Built up so much it crushed us everyday

Every night you cry yourself to sleep
Thinking: "Why does this happen to me?
Why does every moment have to be so hard?"
Hard to believe that

It's not over tonight
Just give me one more chance to make it right
I may not make it through the night
I won't go home without you

It's not over tonight
Just give me one more chance to make it right
I may not make it through the night
I won't go home without you

Of all the things I felt but never really shown
Perhaps the worst is that I ever let you go
I should not ever let you go, oh oh oh

It's not over tonight
Just give me one more chance to make it right
I may not make it through the night
I won't go home without you

It's not over tonight
Just give me one more chance to make it right
I may not make it through the night
I won't go home without you
And I won't go home without you
And I won't go home without you
And I won't go home without you