“I need help with something,” he said.

“Shoot,” I said.

“Counting,” he said. “When you start counting something, do you start at zero?”

“No, of course not.”

“I didn’t think so. So why are we seeing so many end-of-the-decade stories? By basic math, this ‘decade’ is actually only nine years old. Don’t these people know how to count?”

“You’d think,” I said.

“Next,” he said. “Cats and dogs. You’re their masters, right?”

“Well, some people prefer the term animal companions.”

“But you own them, no?”

“In theory.”

“Well,” he said, “it seems the other way around to me. Take dogs, for example. You get up in the middle of the night to let them out, or you follow them around and pick up their, um ... digestive byproducts. So who’s the master of whom?”

“Good point.”

“And cats! They usually ignore you until they want food. Then they feel free to puke up partially digested balls of hair onto the bed covers. Again, who’s in charge here?”

“Us ...?”

"... in theory," he added helpfully.

I shrugged.

“Next question,” he said. "What's up with Pluto?"

"Pluto? The dog?"

"No, Pluto the planet. You demoted it to an 'extra-planetary object.' How do you think the Plutonoids feel?"

"Well, I wasn't personally involved in that decision."

"What do you think the Jupiterians think of Earth?"

"I shudder to think."

“We intercept your television signals" he continued, "and for the last few years we’ve seen advertisements for medicines that promise to cure all sorts of ailments.”

“Yeah, isn’t modern medicine great?”

“But then some guy comes on talking really fast about how this medicine might also cause your hair and teeth to fall out, lead you to break out in boils, bring about intense wobbling, and maybe even kill you. So what’s the point?”

“Well, at least you’ll be over the heartbreak of psoriasis.”

“Since we last met it seems some very silly people acted really foolishly with larges sums of money.”

“That would be a lot of us,” I said.

“So your leaders created this program to try to help everyone out. They called it ‘Cash for Clinkers.’ ”

“Cash for Clunkers,” I corrected. “The idea was to give cash incentives for people to get rid of their old cars and buy news ones.”

“The old ones would be the clunkers, right?”

“Yeah.”

“What happened to the clunkers after the people traded them in?”

“By law they had to be destroyed.”

“Destroyed!?” he asked, dismayed. “They still worked, right?”

“Sure, I suppose.”

“But didn’t you tell me before that your first car was a clunker?”

“Indeed. A ’67 VW Bug.”

“And you said used cars were an ideal way to help people save money on transportation and for young people to afford their first car.”

“Yeah.”

“So by destroying these clunkers, you’ve just taken away a source of inexpensive cars for these people.”

“I see your point.”

“And don’t the people who started this program claim to want to help poor people and the young? Or maybe it was to help only certain, politically connected people, like auto unions? You don’t think your leaders would do that, do you?”

“I can't even imagine it,” I said.

“Next question,” he said.

“Are you sure you want to go on?” I asked.

“I have a long list here.”

“Well, okay. But I haven’t been much help so far.”

“Oh, you’ve been immensely helpful,” he said. “Anyway, this Cash for Clunkers program was part of a larger effort to spend money to try to help a hurting economy. I believe they called it the stimulus.”

“Yeah, somewhere north of $800 billion.”

“Yes, that’s the one. On your Internet, it shows that hundreds of thousands of those dollars were given to schools to teach massage. Is that the best use of the taxpayers’ money?”

“You get the Internet? On Mars?”

“Yeah, Mars Online. You didn’t answer the question.”

“I can’t,” I confessed.

“It also shows that the number of jobs ‘saved or created’ divided by the money spent works out to something like $250,000 per job. (I’ll forget for the moment that it’s impossible to calculate a ‘saved’ job since you’re asked to prove something that didn’t happen.) Why didn’t they just write a check for, say, $50,000 for five unemployed people? It would have helped more people, and their spending would have pumped even more money into the economy.”

“Not as much opportunity for graft and political payoffs if they did it your way,” I said.

“Your leaders would do such things?” he asked, incredulous.

“Go figure.”

“I’ve also been following this whole discussion over ‘health-care reform’ or whatever they’re calling it this week,” he said.

“My head hurts already.”

“The people who are really eager to enact this reform—aren’t they the same ones who say the government should not come between a woman and her doctor over the decision to kill her unborn child?”

“For the most part, yes.”

“But you already have the government trying to come between a woman and her doctor when it comes to medical care that could possibly save her life. It seems that if their plan goes into effect, you’ll have even more of this kind of thing. I’m just not seeing the consistency here.”

“Now my brain hurts.”

“Okay, I’ll try not to cause you too much more pain. But you really must help me with this terrorist thing.”

“Thanks. Now I hurt all over.”

“You recently had a man smuggle a bomb onto a plane despite all the security precautions you’ve put into place.”

“Yeah, pretty scary. He failed only because of sheer incompetence on his part and some alert plane passengers.”

“But immediately afterward your authorities implemented a lot of rules to try to prevent another attack. Like you cannot use the plane’s restroom facilities during the last hour of flight.”

“Yeah.”

“So why wouldn’t the terrorist just detonate his bomb one hour and five minutes before landing? And no blankets on your lap during the last hour? And no personal items on your lap? No books? No computers?”

“Pretty drastic, huh?”

“So what are the passengers supposed to do during that last hour?”

“Sit there and appreciate how safe they feel?”

“I suspect that’s not what they’ll be feeling. Why do they punish you when it was someone else who tried to kill everyone?”

“Because they can.”

“I’ll have to be going soon,” he said. “But this latest session confirms our research, so I wanted to give you some good news and bad news before I leave. Which do you want first?”

“Let’s try the good news. I need it.”

“Okay, we’re going to vaporize Earth in 24 hours. Such an idiotic planet has no place in our solar system, soaking up perfectly good solar energy that would be put to better use warming our planet.”

“That’s the good news!? What’s the bad news?”

“I meant to call on you yesterday.”

One guy I know recounted an incident where a girl he knew heard of her Christian boyfriend's past indiscretions and completely walked away from the relationship. He argued this was wrong. My opinion: She needed to decide if she could deal with it or not. If not, walking away was the right thing to do. There's not a biblical mandate for how to respond in these situations. God gives us a choice.

I believe Christians should always err on the side of grace and forgiveness. However, one must also take into account how someone's past choices may affect a present relationship.

For the person who has not remained a virgin: Keep a loose hand with this issue. Don't let another's lack of acceptance define you. If you have repented, you are 100 percent forgiven. At the same time, don't expect another person to automatically accept your past. (If they are going to have a difficult time getting over it, you probably don't want to be with them anyway.) Realize that one of the natural consequences of your choices may be that some people will not be able to accept the road you have taken. When you find someone special, present your past in a humble way that acknowledges that you understand it may be a deal breaker. Then trust that God will work in both your hearts to bring His will for you about.

For the person who has remained a virgin: Flee from self-righteousness and recognize that God's grace has sustained you. Sure, you may have taken some difficult stands for purity, but you do not know another person's story and the factors that were at play. Realize that if you do not choose to adopt God's gracious heart for the trespasser (which, in truth, is all of us), you may very well miss out on something incredible He has for you. Many godly people in the Bible committed serious indiscretions (David, Noah, Hosea -- commanded by God). Consider the heart of the person now: Are they walking in integrity? Do they have proper accountability? Do they deal with their sin in a godly way? The answers to these questions are often much more important than the person's past.

In response to my blog, one reader wrote: "Let me put it this way. I have been a Christian for less than a year. As such, I'm not a virgin. Am I doomed for the rest of my days to be alone, now?" I would say absolutely not. However, you may experience some consequences of past decisions. And if you encounter a woman who is unwilling to accept your past, show her the grace, humility and honor you would like to be shown. As you align yourself with Christ's heart, you will attract the right kind of person.

Matt's post about Christmas carols reminded me of a favorite family tradition: singing carols. For the past few years, my dad, sisters and I have sung carols outside the church for the Christmas Eve service. Some years we've even dressed in Victorian garb and knocked on neighbors' doors. Watch the video to see us sing "Joy to the World" -- and enjoy the cameo of my nephew.

Other things we seem to always do as a family around Christmas:

• Eat
• Watch White Christmas
• Eat
• Play games
• Eat
• Record silly videos
• And, of course ... eat

What Christmas week traditions do you enjoy with your family? What are some of your best memories of Christmas?

My Christmas was different this year. We visited my husband's family for Christmas ... and started some new traditions of our own. But when I see my family this weekend, I'm sure we'll be up to our old tricks -- including a few robust verses of "Joy to the World."

It's not that I don't think God's forgiveness is complete or that once you screw up, you're damaged goods for life. I just simply would like to think "If I can do it; my future spouse can do it too." Face it. It's pretty disheartening to fight through temptations, beat up your flesh and go through all these precautions to preserve your virginity just to give it away to someone who didn't value you enough to do the same in their life.

This is an issue I have grappled with myself. I talked about it in "Vessel of Honor." I didn't so much maintain the expectation that my future husband be a virgin as I was, but I struggled with the deeper issue of why I was choosing to stay pure. I related to David's words in the Psalms: "Surely in vain have I kept my heart pure; in vain have I washed my hands in innocence," (Psalm 73:13). The Lord reminded me that I was fighting the battles of my flesh for Him alone. It was between us. And my purity was for His glory, not just my own benefit or as a gift for my future husband.

It reminds me of Jesus' response to Peter when he questioned what would happen to John: "Jesus answered, 'If I want him to remain alive until I return, what is that to you? You must follow me' " (John 21:22).

What is that to you? You must follow me. I can honestly say that waiting until marriage for sex was absolutely the best thing I could have done. Mostly it was awesome for my relationship with Christ, because I didn't have to overcome guilt and shame in that area. But as John points out, it's really not about the "benefits."

In essence, our sexual purity (which includes virginity and many other things) is a response to who God is, not who our future (or current) spouse is. I remain faithful to my wife not because she is perfect, but because God is.

So, yes, keep yourself pure, but do it first for the sake of Christ. And yes, desire that in your mate, for the sake of Christ (and they are out there, I promise). Then trust God to do for you more than you could ever ask or imagine. That is His promise to you.

Your future spouse may not be so blessed as to have succeeded at choosing the way of purity. Truly God's grace allows any of us to choose the right path. Fortunately, God can work incredible redemption through brokenness. But what is that to you? Jesus says, "You must follow me." And in doing so, your obedience will not be in vain.

Monday: Single Virgin Female ISO Single Virgin Male, by John Thomas: "Is it pointless to hold on to my dream of marrying a virgin?"

Tuesday: Credemption, by Jonathan Dodson: "Redemptive cultural engagement? It happens through either redirecting or redefining cultural patterns affected by the Fall."

Wednesday: 8 Spark Plugs to Start Your New Year, by Steve Shadrach: "Discover the secret meaning of 'cylinder.'"

Thursday: Clear Decks, by Steve Watters: "Clutter hinders action and opportunity."

Friday: Office Hours: Young Theophilus, Part 1, by J. Budziszewski: "Parts of this really happened. To someone. Draw your own conclusions."

Please accept my apology for the inconvenience this is causing you. Our IT department has been notified. As soon as they've fixed the problems, our Webzine will be back to normal.

In the meantime, you've got the entire week's worth of articles at a glance! I'd love to hear your thoughts on each one. Perhaps a blog team member will write about each one in a separate entry -- that'll make the discussion of each piece a whole lot more coherent.... :-)

It's "What Child Is This." Specifically, the lines:

Nails, spear shall pierce Him through,
The cross be borne for me, for you,
Hail, hail the Word made flesh,
The babe, the son of Mary!

What grabs me about this is the perspective. After all the verses about the infant Lord, similar to those of so many other Christmas hymns, we flash forward for a moment to His adulthood on Good Friday. Then, with that moment vividly in mind, we come right back to the marvel of the incarnation and the baby before us. It no longer feels quite so warm and sweet. But it feels much more significant as we get the big picture. I always hope the people who are in church only on Christmas are paying attention.

There's no one best Christmas carol, of course, any more than there's one best verse of Scripture. But if you had to pick one that has special meaning for you, which would it be? And (this is an essay question, not just fill-in-the-blank) why?

Hey Boundless!

That photo is of the Volcán Arenal, a very active volcano in the beautiful country of Costa Rica. I'm spending the fall semester studying Spanish here, for my junior year in college, and I've been able to visit many of the landmarks for weekend field trips. When I'm not on one of those, I live with a Costa Rican family in Costa Rica's capital, San José.
 
I had a hard time choosing pictures to send, because I've taken an easy thousand since arriving in August. Costa Rica touches both the Caribbean and the Pacific, so it's got some great beaches. However, it isn't an island, contrary to popular belief--it's the country just north of Panama and known as "the pearl of Central America."

While I haven't been able to listen to the podcasts since coming to Costa Rica, I keep up with the blog and occasionally post a comment. I've been really blessed by the different perspectives on being single and Christian; plus I enjoy the other, tangentially-related-to-singleness-if-at-all posts. :) Keep up with the great insights!

Sarah (RS)

PluggedIn.com's Bob Waliszewski and Cheryl Wilhelmi discuss new releases Avatar, Invinctus, and Up in the Air. They begin to discuss a movie featuring Rebecca St. James, but sadly, and inexplicably, our video cuts off. (BTW, Bob highly recommends it.)

What a great time for our publishing system to go berserk on us. But that's what's happened: Neither yesterday's article, "God Gave His Only," nor today's article, "Tonight in Bethlehem," have appeared on our homepage.

If you've got a few minutes, I cannot urge you strongly enough to start reading today's featured article. Author Elisabeth Adams spent some time studying in Israel, and draws heavily on her research into the nativity as she constructs the narrative.

"Tonight in Bethlehem" moved me to tears. I'd love to hear how it affected you.

Each year I struggle to find that balance between tasks (which can certainly take over if I don't watch it) and reflection. On Christmas Eve, I want to remember what this celebration is really about. The most precious gift — Jesus — and the most precious reality — a God who made the greatest sacrifice possible in order to have a relationship with me. This truth obscures all the seemingly insignificant motions I go through.

How can I settle into the truth? Consider three perspectives of joy recorded in Scripture.

Mary — Luke 1:46-50:

“My soul glorifies the Lord and my spirit rejoices in God my Savior, for he has been mindful of the humble state of his servant. From now on all generations will call me blessed, for the Mighty One has done great things for me— holy is his name. His mercy extends to those who fear him, from generation to generation."

Zechariah — Luke 1:68-72:

“Praise be to the Lord, the God of Israel, because he has come and has redeemed his people. He has raised up a horn of salvation for us in the house of his servant David (as he said through his holy prophets of long ago), salvation from our enemies and from the hand of all who hate us—to show mercy to our fathers and to remember his holy covenant."

Simeon — Luke 2:29-32:

“Sovereign Lord, as you have promised, you now dismiss your servant in peace. For my eyes have seen your salvation, which you have prepared in the sight of all people, a light for revelation to the Gentiles and for glory to your people Israel.”

Thinking about the joy of Mary, Zechariah and Simeon, revives my own passion. Imagine the excitement of living at the time when Salvation arrived on earth in the person of Jesus? Some 2000 years later, we still live in the joy and freedom His life, death and resurrection provided. That is a sweet truth this eve of Christmas.

I would say the one common theme from the feedback we got for our 100th episode is an appreciation for our message on intentionality. That and how much everyone loves Lisa. Which is understandable. I guess.

And there's so much more! Here are some of the highlights from part 2 of our 100th episode celebration:

Becky from Canada talks about how she uses Focus on the Family as a verb when she speaks into her friends' lives about relationships.

Elizabeth from Washington credits Boundless with her story of saying "Hi" to "I do" in a year. She also asks the team how the podcast has changed us. Good question.

Angelina from California requests that we do a Roundtable on how churches can better help missionaries assimilate back into community when they return from the field. Interesting topic.

Naomi from Georgia tells us how valuable our show is to keep her "in the know" as she mentors the next generation. Thanks Naomi.

And last but certainly not least, we give Candice Watters a call to get her thoughts on 100 Boundless podcasts. As usual, it's insightful.

So there's a lot of good reasons to tune into this week's show. If nothing else, check it out to hear Lisa singing words, Steve's Spanish-accented Coca-Cola comment, and for our favorite bumper music picks. Which are listed below in order of when they're played.

Jeff Caylor: "Almost Flew"
Reilly: "Beautiful You"
Journey Home: "Because"
Phil Joel: "Every Knee"
Museum: "Grace Alive"

Enjoy the show and have a Merry Christmas!

I'll start with a little feel-good tidbit, bursting with holiday cheer. The AP reports that a woman showed up to the Corpus Christi International Airport to meet her fiance — dressed in a wedding gown and accompanied by a justice of the peace. Talk about the opposite of a runaway bride! According to the article, wedding photos were taken near a Christmas tree at a security checkpoint. As my sister would say, "Bless."

On a more serious note, Joe Cassara delivers a thoughtful Christmas essay on the redemptive power of birth in "A Weary World Rejoices." After his wife's two miscarriages, Cassara describes himself as broken and unwilling to try again. Then:

Fast forward one year. Exactly one year. July 10th, 2009. My wife gave birth to twins. Natural twins. Not that I bought, but that we made, together. And so now I get it, I understand how a birth can be redemptive. How a birth from two broken people can heal pain, can turn many teary eyes toward God. I can be arrogant, but I'm not arrogant in this. What we wanted so badly, what we needed to heal us, came in the form of two babies. Hear me ... we didn’t need babies to heal us, we needed to know that our God was trustworthy. I wonder why God wrote the rules in a way that two people need to get together in order to pop out a baby. He could have just made it so people crawl out of ocean at 11 years old, self-sufficient, no relationship between parents and children. But He didn't...

And so on Christmas, the day we've chosen to celebrate the birth of Jesus, I understand this year for the first time why a birth can be celebrated; why the farmers and prophets and businessmen back when Jesus was born were brought to their knees on his birthday. They were broken, run down and in real need of redemption that had been promised for thousands of years. And so Jesus’ birth was much more than the start of something ... it was the end of a long line of waiting.

Wow. If you're broken, run down and in need of redemption this year ... rejoice! The Savior has come!

And, finally, something utterly fluffy ... if you like that sort of thing. (I do.) Merry Christmas!

We tend to neglect these older readings, partly because it's intimidating (those ancients don't talk like us) and partly because we simply never think about it. That's all the more reason I'd like to call attention to some of it.

Every once in a while I like to re-read On the Incarnationby St. Athanasius, one of the greatest figures in the history of the Christian church. It's not terribly long: My copy's 120 pages, counting an introduction by C.S. Lewis. And I find that if I'm willing to do the work of adapting to the writing style (it's not all thathard), I'm always rewarded. Here's a taste of how Athanasius talks about what he calls "the Divine Dilemma":

Man, who was created in God's image and in his possession of reason reflected the very Word Himself, was disappearing, and the work of God was being undone. The law of death, which followed from the Transgression, prevailed upon us, and from it there was no escape. The thing that was happening was in truth both monstrous and unfitting.

It would, of course, have been unthinkable that God should go back upon His word and that man, having transgressed, should not die; but it was equally monstrous that beings which once had shared the nature of the Word should perish and turn back again into non-existence through corruption. It was unworthy of the goodness of God that creatures made by Him should be brought to nothing through the deceit wrought upon man by the devil; and it was supremely unfitting that the work of God in mankind should disappear, either through their own negligence or through the deceit of evil spirits. ... what then was God, being Good, to do?

I don't know about you, but I find that dramatic and powerful: It really brings home the realities God faced and the immensity of the Divine Dilemma. It also sets the stage for God's solution .. when,

...pitying our race, moved with compassion for our limitation, unable to endure that death should have the mastery, rather than that His creatures should perish and the work of His Father for us men come to nought, He took to Himself a body, a human body even as our own. ...liable to the corruption of death.

There's much more where that came from and it's all worth reading. So if you're up to the challenge, think about giving yourself the gift of Athanasius.

Here endeth the plug. Have a blessed Christmas!

A lot of the coping mechanisms for singleness seem to fall to pieces during the holidays. We all know Thanksgiving and Christmas are about families sitting around tables and Christmas trees, exulting in the warmth of each other's love. Such images intensify one's longing for love and belonging. A few years ago, one single friend confided, "One of my goals is to have a boyfriend by Christmas."

Christmas has made me do some crazy things when it comes to the pursuit of love. Go on doomed-to-failure dates. Rekindle interest in long-ago buried crushes. Waste time texting and e-mailing guys who are impossibly wrong for me. Weak attempts to feel desired and wanted.

Ultimately, though, my self-manufactured romance is intensely unsatisfying. So much so, that I inevitably crash in utter misery and self-pity sometime between Christmas and New Years.

I've speculated before on why Christmas may be one of the most difficult times of the year for Christians. Basically, Advent is all about Jesus and pure, life-giving hope, but Satan is intent on deceiving us into forgetting all about that and thinking it's about us. Only when we shovel out from under our own, personal miseries, can we see that things are actually good. Very good.

Perhaps Christmas is a gift in this way. It offers a season when many of our self-sufficiencies are stripped away and we are forced to refocus on where our hope lies — our eternal salvation through Jesus and the joy and anticipation of what the Father will do for us, and more importantly in us, in this life. Longings for good things we do not yet possess, can push us closer to the Savior.

If you feel alone or abandoned this Christmas, I understand. Last year I was 30 and single. But God can change circumstances in a moment; it's no big thing for Him. This year, as I celebrate Christmas with my husband, I am deeply thankful for that. As much as I understand loneliness, Jesus understands it more.

This Christmas, spend time with people you love and reflect on the fact that Immanuel — God with us — sacrificed Himself so that you and I never have to be alone.

"He who did not spare his own Son, but gave him up for us all—how will he not also, along with him, graciously give us all things?" —Romans 8:32

A) Joy to the World (all happiness, all the time)
B) Silent Night (the less said to each other, the better)
C) Grandma Got Run Over By a Reindeer (it's not a holiday get-together without the annual drama)
D) The 12 Redneck Days of Christmas (who are these people and how was I born into this family?)

It reminded me of Matt's recent blog, where he asked the question: At Christmas, how do you represent Christ and His truth without encouraging conflict with nonbelievers in your family?

It's a good question -- and one that Russell Moore tackles very well. In "A Word About Family Tensions and the Holidays," Moore lists five things a follower of Christ ought to remember in, shall we say, trying yuletide circumstances:

• Peace.

  "Yes, Jesus tells us that His gospel brings a sword of division, and that sometimes this splits up families (Matt. 10:34-37). But there’s a difference between gospel division and carnal division (see 1 Cor. 1, e.g.). The Spirit brings peace (Gal. 5:22), and the sons of God are peacemakers (Matt. 5:9). Since that’s so, we ought to “strive for peace with everyone.” (Heb. 12:14)

  Often, the divisiveness that happens at extended family dinner tables is not because an unbelieving family member decides to persecute a Christian. It’s instead because a Christian decides to go ahead and sort the wheat from the weeds right now, rather than waiting for Judgment Day (Matt. 13:29-30)..."

• Honor.

  "The Scripture tells us to fear God, to obey the king, and to honor (notice this) everyone (1 Pet. 2:17). If your parents are high-priests in the Church of Satan, they are still your parents. If cousin Betty V. does Jello shots in her car, just to take the edge off the cocaine, well, she still bears the imprint of the God you adore..."

• Humility.

  "...Often Christians veer toward Satanism at holiday time because we, deep down, pride ourselves on knowing the truth of the gospel. The rage you feel when Uncle Happy says why “many roads lead to God” might be more about the fact that you want to be right than that you want him to be resurrected..."

• Maturity.

  "Some of the tensions Christians face at holiday time have nothing to do with outside oppression as much as internal immaturity on the part of the Christians themselves.

  I’ve had young men who tell me they feel treated like children when they go home to see their extended families...

  Sometimes that’s because the extended family is particularly obstinate. But sometimes the extended family treats the young man like a child because that’s how he acts the rest of the year.

  [What about us, gals? Do we wax poetic on the oh-too-commercialization of Christmas while our family exchanges knowing glances about our credit card balance?]

• Perspective.

  "At the Judgment Seat of the Lord Christ, you’ll be responsible for living out the gospel in every arena to which the Spirit has led you… including Aunt Flossie’s dining room table."

Read the whole thing. It's way better than the quotes I pulled.

And no matter which Christmas carol describes your family, Moore has given me, at least, some solid counsel for how to represent Christ.

Merry Christmas!

HT: Between Two Worlds