Am I at the point of no improvement?
What of the death I still dwell in?
I try to excel, but I feel no movement.
Can I be free of this unreleasable sin?

[Chorus:]
Never underestimate my Jesus.
You’re telling me that there’s no hope.
I’m telling you you’re wrong.

Never underestimate my Jesus
When the world around you crumbles
He will be strong, He will be strong

I throw up my hands
“Oh, the impossibilities”
Frustrated and tired
Where do I go from here?
Now I’m searching for the confidence I’ve lost so willingly
Overcoming these obstacles is overcoming my fear

[Chorus]

I think I can’t, I think I can’t
But I think You can, I think You can
I think I can’t, I think I can’t
But I think You can, I think You can
Gather my insufficiencies and
place them in Your hands, place them in Your hands, place them in Your hands

Anyway, what tripped it tonight was two things.   Andrew Peterson & the violent death of a former high school classmate.

Every time I see or listen to AP I quickly regain my focus on what really matters in the grand scheme of things.    God, family, friends and then everything else (including my businesses and anything else that I might have my hands in at any given moment).  That’s a good thing except for the fact that I’m always eagerly (and impatiently) looking forward to the next chapter and potentially miss out on some memorable moments of the current one.

Then the violent death of someone I once knew just compounds that by making me see my own mortality through the example of their life.  Even though this wasn’t someone I knew real well, it was someone that I had spent hours working side-by-side with while we were interns one summer (not to mention being classmates for four years).  While I don’t know all of the details, the main detail is the one that concerns me the most.  Death.

I don’t care who you  are or what your relationship is to the person, if you have any sense at all that is going to get the wheels turning upstairs and you’ll begin to ponder “what if today is my last?” and all of the questions that follow that.  And frankly, I don’t want to have to answer that one right now…I’ve got a good forty plus years ahead of me, right?  As proven by this latest tragic event, that answer is clear.  No, not necessarily.

Anyway, I’ve not formulated many organized thoughts beyond that just yet.  But rest assured, God has my attention and I intend to savor every bit of this life he has blessed me with.

I caught Andrew Peterson in concert tonight for the first tour of The Resurrection Letters, his current work-in-progress Easter tour.  I’ve lost track of what AP concert this makes, but it’s probably safe to put that into double digits now.  (And I think this is the second time on a “Selection Sunday”… and honestly that’s a no brainer choice to make.)

This show brought a full band along, including usual sidekick Ben Shive and adding Gabe Scott (AP’s previous usual sidekick), Mandy & Kevin Mann (filling in for Andy & Jill), Jeff Irwin (a.k.a. the M&M guy) and Paul Eckberg.

Great show as always and my two older kids decided that they needed to be part of the show.  But hey, AP and the audience seemed to get a kick out of it…and that’s to be expected when you ask the kids to come down front (at least with my kids…consider yourself warned).

I’ve said it over and over in the past and I will continue to do so as long as there is breath left in my lungs…if Andrew Peterson comes anywhere close to you, GO!  And buy every album of his that you can get your hands on!

Here’s what I ended up getting:

Stargate – The Ark of Truth: I debated on getting a full season of Stargate SG-1 that I didn’t have, but this was newer and not on TV yet. Decent for what’s really a two-part episode, though for the cost I think I’d rather have a season of SG-1 or even Atlantis (which were on sale for a few dollars more).

Logitech PlayStation 2 Cordless Action Controller: I don’t have a lot of time to play video games these days, but when I do it is a must to not have cords on the floor with the kids running around. Plus my couch isn’t all that close to the TV. I’ve had one of these controllers for a few months and just love it and decided to add a second one to replace my old (too-small-for-my-big-fat-hands) controller. And as a bonus, these have great battery life and they come with real batteries (Duracell), not some no-name junk.

Tiger Woods PGA Tour 08: As I said, I don’t have a lot of time to play video games…I’ve got a house full of kids and am now running two businesses. So games that I play must be short and have a definitive end to them (I started a game of Ratchet & Clank probably four years ago and am not done…and probably never will be). For that reason, I like to stick to sports games (other than football). The only golf game I had was an old “Hot Shots” (which isn’t all that great), but I’ve played Tiger Woods 07 on my friend’s Wii and loved it so I decided to give the PS2 version a whirl. This one won’t get old any time soon.

So there you have it. And for those of you who gave me the gift cards, thanks!

It only happens once every four years.  Sometimes not even then.  If you’re lucky enough to make it to eighty, you’ll only see nineteen or twenty of these in your lifetime.  Go, enjoy your extra day.

I’m personally taking the day off to get out of the “office” and I am instituting Leap Day as an official holiday for Watershed Studio.  (Yet another nice thing about running your own business.)  And for those of you who’ve not been to the Watershed site lately, we’ve given the site a much needed face lift.  Take a look and let me know what you think.

Well, I was in the midst of something tonight and missed the total lunar eclipse, but at least I was able to snap a few photos of the partial lunar eclipse. We have to wait for 34 months to see another one of these, so hopefully it will be clear that night as well.

And I missed the space shuttle landing too. I’m just not on it today.

Anyway, they better release some video footage of them shooting the satellite out of the sky…that might make up for it a little.

Turning twenty hit me pretty hard, mainly because I loved nineteen, the age where you’re an adult and have some freedoms, but where you’re still young enough to where people don’t expect a whole lot of you yet and you don’t have any “real” bills. Nineteen was great, though not very fulfilling.

Fast forward a decade.

While I dreaded them at first, my twenties were great. They weren’t easy by any stretch of the imagination, but they were great and full of learning and personal growth/maturity.

In my twenties I graduated from college (AS from Purdue University), got an entry level job (in my degree field with Indiana University), got married (to my “high school sweetheart”), graduated from college again (BS from Purdue University), bought a house, got a promotion to a salary position, became a father, started my own consulting business (on the side at that point), got “laid off” from my “day job”, nurtured my business (with help from above, family & friends) into a “full time” job during my unemployment period, spent a ton of time with my kids during the days and most recently, started another business (I’ve not “officially” announced the details of that though).

So yes, my twenties were not always easy, but they were action packed and far beyond what I could comprehend could take place in a ten year span of time and I stand amazed at how much I’ve learned and grown. Those years will always bring back fond memories, but it’s time to press on and see what my thirties have in store for me.

I look to my thirties not in dread, but rather in anticipation. And maybe that’s just a part of being a little more mature. Yes, the road probably won’t be an easy one (remember, I said that I have kids…and they’re getting older along with dad…AND I’m a small business owner), but I know that it’ll be worth it in the long run and I wouldn’t trade it for the world. Stay tuned after these brief messages (for the next ten years)…

Here’s my hit list of thoughts about the game and season that I don’t have time to expand upon right now:

• For the past two seasons, the Patriots season has came to end with a loss to a Manning.
• With the Patriots losing, the season no longer seems a loss. After the Colts lost to San Diego in the second round of the playoffs (and the second time this season), I seriously didn’t care about the playoffs any more this season, and my only interest was in seeing the Patriots lose. And honestly, I’m a little shocked due to what I know of football history.
• As I said before the game, the “odds” makers were off their rockers. These two teams played a tight game in week 17 and the Giants have been playing better while the Patriots seemed to be slowing down towards the end (just look at Tom Brady’s touchdown numbers plus the win margins). A two touchdown win either way was highly unlikely.
• Only after losing in the Super Bowl, the mainstream media admitted that a win by the Patriots would have been covered with a”cloud” due to their being caught cheating. Ya think!? Now maybe you backpeddlers can stop trying to teach my children that cheating is okay, as is “winning” at any cost.
• Roger Goodell needs to get some kahones and some smarts…
  • Fines and the “loss” of the 31st draft pick as the only means of punishment for cheating is ridiculous. Please, take a page from the NCAA’s punishment book…
    • Fines (the NFL has figured that one out).
    • A deduction in a teams’ salary cap for a certain period of time (to equate to the loss of scholarships in college). I’d personally allow them to keep their draft picks since that is the future of the team, not the “now”, which is who should be punished.
    • No post season play at all for a certain period of time, regardless of regular season record (that one might have worked out well for the Patriots this year though, depending who was still on the team after the salary cap cuts).
    • But we know the later items will probably never happen due to money and there’s probably some clause somewhere that forbids such action. I’m no lawyer, but I can imagine they’ve covered just about every angle.
    • I have heard the excuse that, “every team is doing it”. If that were the case, dish out the punishment across the board and give yourself a bit of integrity.
  • The destruction of the evidence is mind boggling and throws up conspiracy theory flags. I’m interested to see what the Senate is able to pull from that, but regardless, that just seems like a foolish move to me if there was nothing to hide.
• While Peyton still got quite a bit of air time, Eli has finally stepped out of Peytons’ shadow, at least somewhat. Eli still has a way to go to being as good as Peyton, but he also has his ring now, and did it faster than Peyton.

That’s all for now…let the usual flaming from Patriots fans begin. In the meantime, I’m personally looking forward to the Combine here in Indy, the 2008 draft and then what will hopefully be another spectacular season (including what should be a good game up in Green Bay). Wouldn’t it be a nice story line to have a Manning vs. Manning Super Bowl?

In this context (local phone book ads) that response is a honest one, as almost anyone who has been in the tech consulting business on a “small shop” scale for a while will probably agree. The cost-benefit just isn’t there until your company is a certain size AND when/if you have a service that a lot of people locally need and/or want. And personally, I’m not all that interested in running a large company just yet. (I’d rather enjoy my time with my children, thus staying a “small business” is the easiest way to do that.)

When we first started out we ran ads in a few places around town to get our name out in front of thousands of people. After two years of that without a single nibble, we have ditched that almost entirely and have focused on what has consistently brought people “in the door”. Word of Mouth (WoM) referrals (referrals from clients, references on blogs and websites, etc.), our website (via search engines), our open source WordPress plugins and of course happy, repeat clients.

The business that we’re in, and our specialty in particular, is still a pretty niche market overall. Thus the vast majority of our clients are out-of-state or out-of-country, which makes perfect sense given that most of what we do is focused on the “online community” and not a geographic community.

So, yes, we honestly don’t need traditional advertising and any local traditional advertising that we may do will serve some other purpose as well. That way, at the very least it helps others’ in the community (like supporting the arts or childrens’ sports leagues).

While I know that I have already accomplished a lot, there is just something “there” that drives me further each day in the pursuit of whatever the bigger picture may be for my life. It’s a little hard to put that “fire” into words, but for anyone who has been following Indianapolis Colts head coach Tony Dungy’s football career, it’s sort of like that. (This is what I do…for now. If I can’t continue to do it well, I’d rather step aside and let someone else have a shot. This isn’t what I want to do forever, but as long as it is where God wants me to be, I’ll continue. And at the end of the day the two most important things to me are my God and my family.)

Now that I’ve set a somber tone for the day, throw open the curtains, bask in the sunlight, then at some point head outside into the brisk January air, close your eyes, arms wide open, head towards the sky, take a deep breath and just thank God for the opportunity to live and breath yet another day. You never know how many more you might have, so treat each day as it is your last and as the gift that it is.

• Jeff & I had a DJ gig which was fun and interesting at one point. It’s just a hobby and both of us are extremely busy, so don’t expect that to be a common activity for us. And for those of you wondering, I’m the DJ, he’s the rapper. (And if you don’t get the reference you’re either too young OR you’re too old.)
• I had dinner at Hard Rock Cafe for the first time since the sale and I have to say I like the old menu better and the prices seem even higher than before.
• I saw Trans-Siberian Orchestra down at the Fieldhouse. Great two hour and forty-five minute show. A little loud at the end (how old am I?) and probably not for everyone, but if you’re into “rock opera”, you’ve got to check it out.
• My wife and I celebrated our anniversary. (Christmas weddings are awesome by the way.) Man, do the years pass quickly and looking back at the photos, there’s no denying that I’m looking older.
• I saw Sweeney Todd (for my anniversary). If you’re not familiar with the story line I’ll just say that it’s NOT appropriate for children AND it is NOT appropriate for some adults. Johnny Deep did an excellent job and Tim Burton worked his usual magic. But it is a bit bloody and “dark”, so don’t see it solely on my “thumbs up”.
• I ate at the Rathskeller for the first time (and also for my anniversary). German food is excellent, though I’m not sure why it is a bit pricey (at least it has been at the German restaurants that I’ve been.)
• Christmas shopping, Christmas parties, Christmas get-togethers’ & family time.
• My wife and I had our annual viewing of How the Ghosts Stole Christmas, guest staring Lily Tomlin and Edward Asner, while we wrapped presents on Christmas Eve. Even if you’re not a fan of the X-Files, this is a must see episode and in my opinion the best of the bunch (and I’ve seen them all).
• For the second year running, I watched It’s a Wonderful Life by myself very late Christmas Eve while I was finishing up my own wrapping and Christmas projects (that’s what happens when you procrastinate). This year it occurred to me that this is more of a “guy movie” and why just about every female I know would prefer to watch White Christmas or Holiday Inn (both of which I don’t have to watch every year). But It’s a Wonderful Life resonates with me and I’d guess that’d be the case with just about every male who has a family to take care of. And the whole small business vs. big business conflict also draws me in.
• Also late Christmas Eve I put in the short old version of Miracle on 34th Street. Classic.
• I watched A Christmas Story with some friends. That movie never gets old. “My old man … worked in profanity the way other artists might work in oils or clay. It was his true medium; a master.”
• We watched The Polar Express while we put up the tree. Excellent family movie.
• We watched The Santa Clause 3: The Escape Clause. Nowhere near as good as the first two and I’d only suggest buying it to complete the trilogy.
• Jeff & I recorded a few Trolley Dodgers and Utter Oddcast episodes.
• The Future Karnies of America wrote, recorded, mixed and released Karnie Christmas 2007 (a.k.a. Karnie Christmas 3). A fun time was had by all. (#2 is still my favorite, though the recording of #3 is a step up.)
• I started some new blog ventures which should be a bit more “there” within a few months.
• Football, football and more football. Man I love December and January football.
• And of course the usual being a husband, father and small business owner.

So, that give a limited idea of what I’ve been up to. Normal posting should resume shortly.

Chief technology officer
Pay range: $128,017 to $212,100.

Project manager
Pay range: $77,265 to $112,615.

Help desk support
Pay range: $79,033 to $109,838.

Database manager
Pay range: $59,843 to $83,325.

Web developer
Pay range: $57,823 to $87,113.

These numbers had to be pulled out of the air or via a very bad source. There is no way that this is an average range here in Indianapolis.

Just last year I applied for a web developer job at the Indy Star and I am almost certain that their salary would have been nowhere near that salary range, even for someone who has done this sort of thing for over a decade. Most places in Indy might offer $40k if you’re lucky, and I actually had a few tell me that $30k was as high as they could go. AND these were companies that listed their jobs in Career Builder. How hard is it to check your figures when the data should be right in front of you?

Kids, don’t let these numbers fool you into selecting the IT field. Trust me, they are in no way average and outside of Indiana you need to consider the cost of living differences. There are plenty of jobs out there that make better money if that’s all you’re after.

And if you really want to go into the IT field, I suggest paying your dues for a few years to get a feel for the corporate world, and if you’re the entrepreneurial type, start a consulting business on the side that you can groom into a full-time job. I know that’s not for everyone, but I am extremely happy that I am doing what I’m doing. It is a little nerve-wracking at times, but at least you have some say over what you do and how much you make.

NFL & Big Ten, stop trying to charge the cable companies twice the price that they can get ESPN for. Sit down and do some simple math. No subscribers equals no money (for the Big Ten). And I can only speculate how many people have actually added the NFL Network since it was “free” last year and you only need it for a few weeks a year watch the Thursday night games. Being in every house, even at “half price”, is infinitely more revenue for the Big Ten and a nice chunk of change for the NFL Network.

(Sidenote: The NFL is showing games for free on their website, but it’s a little choppy even on a fast connection and there is way too much going on. Plus it’s small and you can resize it. It’s sort of like watching one of the major news channels with all kinds of other items going on around the video. And that’s not very watchable in my opinion. I am glad that they took to effort to do that though.)
Comcast, stop insisting on charging people $5 per month more for something that costs you sixty some cents per month (from the reports). Put it in the standard package and if you must ditch some channels to keep the price “down”, how about moving channels like Court TV and the Golf Channel to some special package add-on?

Anyway, I have no plans of switching to satellite for various reasons. And due to decisions by the politicians in the city years ago (which also got rid of “Public Access” TV), Comcast is my only option for “cable” until the phone service is upgraded in my area. Until then, I can only hope that these guys get it together or that affordable “a la carte cable” actually comes to fruition.

Depending upon who you talk to, it can mean a variety of things, but here’s a my list of blogs & blog posts that I’ll thrown in that category…

• Link posts. This can be something like “Check out so-and-so’s post/article about XYZ.” Or something with a pulled quote, a link and very quick commentary (i.e. just about any Utter Oddness post.). And also link “dailies”.
• Tidbit posts / blog grenades. This can be just a brief mention of something but offers little to no elaboration. While this is great to get the creative juices flowing, it does tend to irritate people who come looking for “meat”.
• Random posts. This can be random in the sense of the blog audience or random in the sense of the content within the actual post. It just seems out of place from the normal posts.
• Thoughtless posts. These posts are often the result of a person just sitting down at their keyboard and hacking away until something shows up on the screen and some smelly digital diarrhea is left behind for all to “enjoy”. (I apologize now for the imagery that statement may cause…but you get my point, right?)

Now there are other criteria you could use, but that list covers most “shotgun posts” you may stumble across in the blogosphere. And I must assert that if a blog is touted as a personal journal, this doesn’t matter quite as much as it does for blogs who have an intended audience besides people just interested in you. (I’m sure that people will argue some of my list…but it is my personal list, so take that with a grain of salt.)

Of the bunch, the only one that truly irks me are thoughtless posts. I can usually pick up a copy of the local newspaper if I want to read that sort of thing. Luckily I don’t run into that very often.

Blog grenades intrigue me a bit and random posts can be interesting from time-to-time. And I absolutely love link posts as they save me time by finding the content for me.

So, with that overview, I’d like to introduce you to my new sideblog/asides/mini-blog, Blue Shotgun.

There are often times that I really want to post links, tidbits, random thoughts, announcements, etc., but within the context of my personal blog, or any of my other blogs (even the ones which are technically shotgun blogs), it normally doesn’t seem appropriate, so I refrain (with a few exceptions here and there).

This is where Blue Shotgun comes into play.

While Blue Shotgun is going to serve as my sideblog/blog companion for Musings, I have opted to make this a fully functional standalone blog because normal sideblog setups are very limiting in what you AND your readers can do. With it setup this way, you, the reader, can:

1. Search the sideblog.
2. Comment on the sideblog entries.
3. Subscribe to RSS feeds.
4. See the recent entries via all Surge Bucket Media blogs. (If you didn’t catch it, or only read the RSS and haven’t visited any of the sites recently, there is now a recent SBM posts section at the bottom of all blogs.)

Content wise, I’m aiming for “anything goes” topic wise (within reason and decency of course), so I’m not sure what all will show up over there. And be prepared for the postings to come in fast spurts. While there may be days between postings at times, when I do pop in to post, they will often appear in quantity since these should all be pretty short.

Off the bat, I can tell you that general podcast announcements (i.e. “Trolley Dodgers #XX is now available”), ad scans, links and quips will be showing up. So if you want to keep seeing those updates, either bookmark Blue Shotgun or subscribe to the RSS feed.

Enjoy. (Or ignore.) Your choice.

The purchases this year were pretty simple, as I wasn’t after any “big ticket” items or even toys for that matter…

Office Max…I picked up a memory card, some CD-R’s, some pens and most importantly, Norton Internet Security 2008. Savings…well over $100. And they started the online sales on Thursday, which as a bonus.

Circuit City…DVD’s, DVD’s and more DVD’s. They had an amazing sale on DVD’s and all I can say is that maybe the huge discounts are related to the fact the HD-DVD and Blu-ray discs are starting to roll out pretty heavily. But DVD quality beats VHS by far and I don’t own a HDTV, so I’m a happy shopper. I am a little surprised that they offered so many online, but man was that much easier than hunting them down in the store. Savings…I can’t give a good estimate, but it was a lot.

Target…two DVD’s at $3.98 each. I actually had my brother-in-law pick these up. Savings…probably $18-20 or so based on retail prices.

So I’m happy how this worked out and will probably try to do my shopping online for what little shopping I have left to do. I did that one year and it is truly amazing and so much easier. Order, pay, check the mail, wrap, give away. But I still like to buy clothes in person as I can’t get a good grasp on what I’m buying online. Plus, doesn’t the feel of the fabric make a huge impact on the buy or don’t buy decision?

Salivate with me if you will…

Snacks & Appetizers

• Summer sausage, cheese (cheddar, swiss & mozzarella) & crackers (Keebler Club & Town House). And toss in a cheese ball for good measure.
• Deviled eggs. Is there a more tasty, more addictive food that’s not that good for you? I could eat deviled eggs.
• Ham roll ups. My mom has made these for years, usually on New Years Eve.
• Ham salad on tiny pumpernickel bread. Addicting for some reason.

The Main Course

• Turkey and dressing (and possibly stuffing if I’m in the mood). Good tender, juicy & moist turkey with that awesome aroma.
• Spiral sliced, glazed ham. Need I say more?
• Mashed potatoes. The real thing with plenty of butter. Topped with gravy or noodles or just plain, it’s all good.
• Rolls. Warm and soft also with plenty of butter.
• Cranberry Sauce. Yes, I like the stuff that comes out of a can. But if you want to whip your own up, knock me out.

Treats

• Pumpkin pie. I’m not sure what it is about pumpkin pie, but it just hits the spot. And that’s even after being in a pumpkin pie eating contest last year.
• Peanut butter fudge. Truly tasty.
• Bourbon balls. For some reason Jack Daniels laced chocolate treats hit the spot, even for non-drinkers. In the “liquor foods” category these have to be right up there with rum cake and bread pudding (with rum soaked raisins).
• Buckeyes. These aren’t something that are a common staple at functions that I attend, but when I find some you’ll know I’ll dig in.
• Cheap “holiday cookies”. You know what I’m talking about. The box or bag of colored sugar coated cookies that you can pick up for a buck at any grocery store. These aren’t the best thing in the world, but they bring back childhood memories, as my grandma always seemed to have these around. Eat them with a cup of coffee and they suddenly seem a bit more fancy.
• Mint M&M’s. I am so disappointed that these are a seasonal item, but rest assured, there’s an extremely good chance you’ll find a bag of these in my house well into the next fall. Last year I think I bought about a dozen bags and have just now broken into my last one since they’re on the shelves again. (Tip: store these in the refrigerator or freezer.)

So, what makes your personal favorites list? I left a lot of options off of the list, so please chime in.