Brian Laesch . com

This is My Old Blog

noreply@blogger.com (BrianLaesch.com) — Sun, 13 Dec 2009 05:24:00 +0000

The new blog can be found here: BrianLaesch.com.

Thanks,

Brian

I'm a Professional Alternate Juror

noreply@blogger.com (BrianLaesch.com) — Sat, 03 Mar 2007 08:53:00 +0000

In case any of you were wondering, I've finally found my calling: Professional Los Angeles Criminal Court Alternate Juror. I am so good. Nobody takes there temporary, one week-long job more serious than me. I take the best meaningless notes; I sit in the hallway while the real jury deliberates better than any unlucky person in Los Angeles; and I'm unbelievably talented when it comes to saying exactly the right things, to not only get screwed over by being selected to a jury, but to become an alternate juror, where I can't even vote on the case, but have to be there everyday. I take my job very seriously. It's my civil duty, or civic duty, or my Honda Civic, or some shit.

Inconceivable, man. Could I get any luckier? I've been out of work all week, after being selected to be an alternate juror on a trial in downtown Los Angeles. Being an "alternate juror" is really, really, really important. I get to be there all week, but do nothing! I get to "play" juror, but I'm not really "in" the jury. It's so sweet. I might as well be wearing Osh Kosh B'Gosh red corduroy overalls and playing with Ninja Turtles action figures while I'm in the jury box. When addressing me, they should call recess "nap time." I shouldn't be in the jury box. I should be sitting in a fucking sandbox right under the judge, building sand castles and bugging the court reporter. So ridiculous. When the jury went into deliberation today, I got to sit in the hallway, as if I had just gotten in trouble for snapping Sally Jenkenheimer's bra strap in 8th grade! (That never happened.) Awesome!

But the best part? I have to go back Monday morning! SuperMarioBrothers! I have to frickin' (and I type "frickin" with the highest verbosity possible, or something) be there at 8:30 a.m. and just to sit on a cold stone bench in a hallway that reminds me of the movie The Shining (I don't know why, but it does) until these idiots come up with the obvious verdict that should have taken 5 minutes today.

Oh well... I guess a week's worth of 6:00 p.m. depression, for no apparent reason, is good for the chicken soup. I can't take it much longer though, and I know one thing: next time I make it onto a panel of potential jurors, I'm going to lie my ass off, or say tell them that these blogs are my primary source of income and claim "financial hardship." Because, fuck this shit.

PRESS RELEASE

noreply@blogger.com (BrianLaesch.com) — Sun, 25 Feb 2007 02:24:00 +0000

Somebody once asked me, "Brian Laesch, how is it that you are so good at feeding your ego via Myspace? I wish I was as cool as you." Well Tila Tequilla...it's quite simple. I do stuff like this:
Here is a press release that is about to drop ya'll. It features me, in regards to a new site SMS.AC. Check it out. Here is my profile. And here is the press release:

FOR IMMEDIATE RELEASE

Aspiring Writer/Film Maker Gets More Than Just Exposure on SMS.ac

San Diego, CA- February 15, 2007 – Brian Laesch of Hollywood, California is not following the typical Hollywood process of gaining exposure for his short films. Instead, Laesch discovered a new and innovative process to earn money and gain exposure, simply by uploading his short films on SMS.ac. [http://www.sms.ac/profile/NewCustomProfile.aspx?u=brianlaesch1819].

His videos, titled "Webcam Murder Series", are being streamed online around the world using a pay-per-view system developed by SMS.ac and are available to their member base of 50 million film & video enthusiasts. By tapping into the international community of SMS.ac, Laesch is able to provide entertaining short films on the user's homepage for a small subscription fee billable to the user's mobile phone.

Laesch, an assistant in post production at New Line Cinema [http://www.newline.com/], originally moved to Hollywood from Bloomington, Illinois to pursue a career as an actor and writer. Realizing that he did not want to endure the Hollywood process for actors, he found his niche in writing and making films.

Webcam Murder Series was filmed when Laesch and his roommates where forced to stay indoors by a four day rainstorm. "I was living in a house with a few of my friends from college, basically a year after graduation. It kind of became the new 'frat house', so random stuff like filming a series ensued quite a bit," explains Laesch. His sense of humor and his films are "pretty sarcastic, goofy, and a bit random," says Laesch.

"SMS.AC has increased the number of people who have seen my stuff already, and it's just getting started. People from all over the world have commented on my videos thanks to SMS.ac."

For more information, contact Kathee Austin at 1-480-998-0246 or visit SMS.ac's website at http://www.sms.ac/.

About Laesch: Laesch's first novel, "The Verge of Psychosis" is being published in 2007 and is loosely based off of his experiences while trying to be discovered in Hollywood.
About SMS.ac: SMS.ac is the world's largest mobile community and marketplace, meshing together a growing, interactive society of 50 million members in 180+ countries with hundreds of mobile operators to create a global wireless communications network for the exchange of information, products and services.

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Check Out My Interview on Mr. Joe Blog's Blog

noreply@blogger.com (BrianLaesch.com) — Thu, 18 Jan 2007 06:02:00 +0000

I know that a lot of you are probably at work, right now, while reading this. Well stop. Stop work. This is way more important...

I was "interviewed" by the good folks at Mr. Joe Blog's Blog. Actually, the interview was supposed to be about YouTubeRoast.com, but I turned it into a personal promotion, because...well...do you see this honkee gettin' any younger? Shooooottttttt.

Check out the interview here.

Here is one of my favorites from the interview (Gosh...I'm such a genius. Everybody else is so dumb!):

What do people commonly say about your site?
They say it's "funny." They say it's "cool." They say it's,
"One of the best websites since former President Richard Nixon ran his own personal blog during the Watergate scandal." Most people don't know that "Deep Throat" started as a screename.

I've Decided to Outsource My Blog to India

noreply@blogger.com (BrianLaesch.com) — Tue, 09 Jan 2007 21:13:00 +0000

NOTE: Originally posted June 9, 2006 on DrunkBlogger.com.

A lot of you (3 people) have probably been wondering why I haven’t been writing as many blogs. (Especially when I’m trapped, working in a cage every night and have plenty of time to write.)

Well the truth (that I made up) is, I’ve outsourced my blogs to India and the turnaround is not very quick. I thought outsourcing my blogs to India would be more cost effective, but it turns out that wit doesn’t translate very well. Also, apparently they are confused because instead of e-mailing me the blogs when they are done, they print them up and send them snail mail style. (I’m going to start saying snail mail style. Not because it’s cool. Because it’s lame.) It takes the blogs 2 weeks to arrive, and by the time they do, the pop culture subjects I gave them to write about are yesterday’s news. Or actually, should I say, 2 weeks ago’s news. HAHA, LOL,ROTFL,LMAO,HEHE,TEHEHE,HAHA,LOL.

The other problem is, they don’t even attempt to write them when they are drunk and pissed off. Unbelievable.

Anyway, the point is, outsourcing sucks. Now, they are going to outsource Drive-Thru windows at some McDonald’s? This totally sucks. What am I going to do when I’m driving home from work at 3:00 AM PST and I want fast food? I mean, sure, I’ll still be able to buy it, but I won’t get the opportunity to look at somebody who has an even worse job than me and be reminded of how awesome…I mean, lucky I am.

So I think I’m going to stop outsourcing my blogs and start writing them again. Don’t get me wrong, Sanjay did his best and he was a hard-worker, but it’s tough to match my skill (ways of finding creative solutions for boredom at work). Thanks again Sanjay but sorry, I’m tired of reading blogs entitled:

“How Is It About K-Fed, You Hear? By Brian Larsche”

Brian Laesch once was told that he may be able to be a regular contributor to some kind of publication or something. The person was high though and didn’t remember saying it the next day.

The Night I Became Stone Cold Brian Laesch

noreply@blogger.com (BrianLaesch.com) — Tue, 09 Jan 2007 21:09:00 +0000

NOTE: Originally posted June 18, 2006 on DrunkBlogger.com.

I’m not talking about wrestlers either. With douchebags all up in my atmosphere I “partied” at the Standard on Sunset. Maybe I’m too old for this shit now but it was about as fun as trying to pick up girls on Myspace. A big part of my lack of enjoyment (wasn’t that an awesome, wordy expression?) came from the company I was keeping, dancing like Backstreet Boys and ruining all game by having none themselves. Not to mention, a business connection was almost lost due to bad jokes about midget porn almost drowning out the “real talk” I was giving to a girl who I overheard designs websites and knows some writers. Luckily, she saw through the bullshit. I know what Jay-Z means now when he says “real talk” as well. Because there isn’t much going on in Hollywood, especially where I was tonight.

So…what did I do? I did what I always do in these situations - drink by myself, leaning against the wall, thinking way too much (but I can’t control it), talk to a few girls who pass by (but don’t really try too hard or really care) and wait to leave. Then, as we were getting ready to go to an afterhours club with some girls who were actually attractive (but we would be paying for), I did the second thing I tend to do - walk off by myself, without telling anybody and start walking home. I’ve actually logged a lot of miles walking home drunk by myself in the past few years. It clears my head…kind of.

So that brings me to now…the pathetic ending to a day I spent drinking, all day. This is why I’m the drunk blogger. Somehow, I can still do this shit, even though I’ve been drinking literally all day. Shit, actually, over 24 hours since I went out last night too. So here is my night, tons of potential, I’m disinterested, knowing I’m not in the right place in my life, but also feeling good, knowing I’m working on getting there. I’m so over Hollywood, it’s not even funny. It makes me lose my mojo and as soon as I go out of town, I become myself again. I can talk to girls with interest and “follow through.” I can smile without trying really hard, naturally. I can breathe.
So this is my night. The night I became Stone Cold Brian Laesch - whatever that is. Feeling nothing because reality is hard to come by in this town. Which is another reason I know I will make it. Because the genuine ones usually do. And I’m one of them, even with this Stone Cold personna. My party days are over. My celebration days are coming. And everybody can kiss my ass.

Also, Cold Stone Creamery makes really good ice cream, but not as good as Laesch Dairy.

Brian Laesch A.K.A. Drunk Blogger is actually drunk during the writing of this blog. Also, he writes for the LA Times, Chicago Tribune, Miami Herald and New York Times.

You Might Be On The Flight From Hell If...

noreply@blogger.com (BrianLaesch.com) — Tue, 09 Jan 2007 21:03:00 +0000

NOTE: Originally posted on July 10, 2006 on DrunkBlogger.com.

For this blog, imagine that I’m doing a really bad Jeff Foxworthy impression (I’m not a Jeff Foxworthy fan. I mean, he’s alright, but come on - I’m too pimp for that shit.):
You might be on the flight from hell if….

1. You get 1 hour of sleep, arriving at the airport in Indianapolis at 7:00 AM
for your 8:00 AM flight.
2. You board your 8:00 AM flight, already feeling
pretty miserable at 7:45 AM.
3. You arrive at your seat to find that your
window seat request has not been granted and you are sitting bitch.
4. You
sit, very crowded in the middle seat, falling in and out of sleep, for an hour,
until the pilot makes an announcement.
5. The airplane did not undergo
maintenance the night before. There is a problem with the engine and it is
mysteriously leaking. Everybody please exit the plane and return to the gate for
further instructions.
6. After about an hour, falling in and out of sleep
again, and not knowing what’s going on, you find out that they have found the
part of the plane that they need to replace locally in Indianapolis and it
should be fixed and ready to go by 12:30 PM.
7. You get $25 flight vouchers,
$10 for food in the airport and finally board the same plane again at 12:30
PM. Besides the uneasy feeling of boarding the same plane that had engine
trouble - everything is now fine. The flight from Hell is over…or is
it?
8. You get seated in the same middle seat, even though you are
the biggest person in the row. But not only that…you get seated next to
the worst 3rd Grader who has ever lived (who was traveling by himself).

Alright, let’s drop this Jeff Foxworthy format for the rest of the story. (As if it was really working. As if you were really buying it and as if you had even thought about it past the first line of this blog.) Have you ever met a kid that is so bad, that you really want to fight, his parents (since you can’t beat up a little kid of course…even though it may have been the best remedy for this kid)?

This kid started with the usual annoying-kid-on-flight antics: talking a lot, playing Gameboy and asking the guy on my left questions about the game every 2 seconds and of course, asking every 5 minutes, “How long have we been in the air?”

That kind of stuff is granted. You can’t blame a kid for being a kid. But…after that, it pretty much turned to psychosis. This kid is a future criminal.

He started talking about how much he likes violence and how it was his middle name. He referred to video games and how much he likes killing people in them. Randomly througout the flight, he would talk about plane crashes and plane crashes in his flight simulation games and how much blood would be spilled from the passengers during the crashes. I’m not making this stuff up. This kid was insane. I don’t need to see the remake of “Omen.” It was sitting right next to me.

He continued to talk about other things he did in his video games…stuff that is so bad, I won’t even mention it in this blog in fear of getting tracked down by the government. Let’s just say, he mentioned “explosives,” (no seriously, I’m not using the “b” word and getting arrested by Homeland Security) Washington, D.C. and a certain leader of our country all in the same story about his video game and what he did with his bomber plane. The kid was nuts and only in 3rd grade. There is a lot more he said but it was a 4 hour flight. You get the point about Junior Manson. Had he been an adult saying this stuff on a plane, they would have landed, and he would be in jail.

He got crazier as the flight went on and I came to find out, via the flight attendant, that the kid was off his medication and was due for another dose. But when the flight attendant brought him water to take it, of course he didn’t, and just acted like he did. So I had to deal with the kid who went from annoying to criminally psychotic in a matter of hours. By this time he kept showing off his boxing and kickboxing moves, fighting the air, talking about how much he likes to fight at school and how he told his teacher to “fuck off” when she reached for the phone to call the principal…and how she supposedly listened to him because she didn’t want to mess with him.
To top it all off, as we landed, he chanted, “Crash! Crash! Crash!” and talked about how we weren’t really “that high up,” and that since he got 6 stitches around his eye and didn’t go blind, he was pretty sure that he could survive a plane crash.

Insane.

After all of this, I had to take an hour shuttle to where my car was parked.
What was supposed to be a 9:25 AM arrival in LA for me turned intoa 4:20 PM arrival…just in time to get ready for work.

So all in all, I think you can tell how shitty my travel experience was. Also, you might be a redneck if your family tree doesn’t fork. Somehow, I believe in my heart, that this whole blog and it’s Jeff Foxworthy theme ties in together and makes sense. And because of that fact…I’m going to hit the “publish” button…and I’m going to hit the “publish” button right…now.

Drunk Blogger, the nonsensical version of Brian Laesch that makes more sense than regular Brian Laesch.

"The Good Shepherd" Ruins My Christmas

noreply@blogger.com (BrianLaesch.com) — Thu, 28 Dec 2006 04:45:00 +0000

Gosh damn it did that suck!

After a great Christmas morning and afternoon in West Palm Beach, FL, my family and I realized that it had been a pretty quick Christmas, as far as Christmases go in our family, so we all decided to be like, unprecendeted and see an evening movie.

Our Top 3 choices (that none of us had seen)? The Good Shepherd, Rocky Balboa, Pursuit of Happyness.

The vote winner? The Good Shepherd.

The result? Horrible.

What a piece of shit that ended up being. "The Godfather of CIA movies"? WTF??? More like the "Stop Or My Mom Will Shoot of CIA movies." Actually...not even that good.

I'm pissed too because I was really, really excited about this movie. It takes a lot to get me excited about a movie, solely based off a trailer, and this one had accomplished it. Now, I see the trailer on TV and get pissed off that anybody could try to sell this movie the way they are and sleep at night. The only thing this film had to do with The Godfather is Robert De Niro and he was hardly in the film. He just directed it...unfortunately. (Sorry Bob, still a fan though.)

I'm not even going to get into the negative light this film paints the CIA in, or the fact that Matt Damon basically gets raped by Angelina Jolie in it, or the fact that the story isn't really even based on facts at all.

But I will give you a breakdown of the performances of all the BIG STARS in this film. They sell this thing as a star-studded blockbuster, yet half of the people they show in the trailer are barely in the film. And let's get this straight, nobody "stars" in this film. So without giving away the "plot" (I guess there is one.), here we go:

Robert De Niro: Directs the film and plays the role of some CIA dude in a wheelchair. He's barely in the film and doesn't seem to even fit the role. His role in "Meet The Parents" was way better.

Joe Pesci: Joe Pesci appears in this film for exactly 2 seconds and says the word "nigger," for no apparent reason, except to maybe feed off of some of the media buzz Michael Richards got. His character seemed like he could have been the most interesting in the film, yet I have no idea who he even is. Oh yeah, and he's Italian. It's a stretch.

Alec Baldwin: ??? Oh yeah...he was in the film. He plays an FBI guy who shows up every once in a while and acts like Alec Baldwin.

William Hurt: Pretty good performance, but he plays a criminal in the CIA basically. Hollywood portraying government officials as criminals? No way! That's revolutionary.

Angelina Jolie: I guess her performance is pretty good, but it doesn't help the film and she rapes Matt Damon and gets pregnant.

Matt Damon: The lead. I guess a pretty good performance as well, but not entertaining and for somebody in the CIA, he sure seems to be lead around by everybody in the world by one of those kid leashes. He also performs in a play, dressed in drag and singing like a girl. He immediately receives an offer to join the infamous "Skull & Bones" fraternity in his dressing room afterwards. It reminded me of Team America. Also, him dressing up like a girl and singing has nothing to do with his character, at all, for the rest of the film. He acts like a librarian the rest of the film.

So yeah. It sucked--and I don't use that word lightly. Also, the actor who plays Matt Damon's son is a really creepy pants pee-er and I think is actually older than Matt Damon. Trust me--it will all make sense when you don't see it.

Check Out My Acting Debut in "Driving to Zigzigland"

noreply@blogger.com (BrianLaesch.com) — Sun, 24 Dec 2006 05:18:00 +0000

First of all, sorry. I promise to get back to more real, Brian-Laesch-style blogs soon...but for now...here is another self-promotion.

Check out my performance in the new indie film, "Driving to Zigzigland," as the drunken soldier, Jake. It's by no means a leading role, but it is some good screen time and a pretty good performance on my part. (It was really hard to channel being drunk. I had to do a lot of research on how that works since I obviously had no idea.) I also consider it my first tangible acting gig that's worth anything. (I'm not playing the part of "scenery.") The funny thing is--we filmed this almost two years ago, and for all intensive purposes, I quit acting a year ago (besides the occasional commercial audition). But now, this film is about to hit the festival circuit and has even gotten some good press on Yahoo! News. Check it out.

So it's fun--which is all I ever wanted out of acting. I don't want an acting career, unless a writing career is attached to it. I'm not an actor...but I can act. So check it out. You can check it out on my IMDB profile as well and hopefully I'll get a clip of my scene up here soon. Happy Holidays everybody (and I promise I'll get back to writing some goofy, random, gangsta rap-influenced, mindless dribble soon).

Five Hours in Detroit...Not That Bad

noreply@blogger.com (BrianLaesch.com) — Thu, 30 Nov 2006 21:28:00 +0000

Well, what I thought was going to be the worst thing in the world, was actually not too bad. When I got to Detroit for my 5-hour layover, I was pleasantly surprised to find a brand new, totally re-modeled, Northwest Airlines terminal that seemed to be Detroit's airport's response to the "Mall of America," except in Japan.

Little did I know that Northwest's huge terminal in Detroit was home to a lot of inbound and outbound flights to Japan. Everything in the terminal was in English and Japanese and there were a ton of restaurants and shops all over, including...wait for it...wait for it...sushi!...which I didn't eat. Does that piss you off that I made you wait for it, but instead, I went to a Mexican restaurant where I ate chicken quesadillas and drank two Coronas? It would piss me off. But then again, that's why I'm Trott Felipe...I mean Brian Laesch.

So, to make a long story short, I was very entertained in the Northwest Airlines terminal in the Detroit Metro Airport. The 5-hour layover, really wasn't that bad. Actually, I pretty much did all the stuff that I would have done on a normal Sunday anyway, except it was a Monday.

So sorry, I wish I had some great, pissed-off story about how much it sucked and how...well...I guess I could talk about the flight home. That did suck. I had a window seat and a fat kid in the middle who kept getting all up in my personal space and shit. Damn it did that suck. I thought my left shoulder was going to be dislocated by the end of the flight. Yeah...I could talk about that...but everybody experiences that ish.

So yeah, my five hour stay in Detroit was pretty decent. I didn't get to take a tour of the Suzuki automobile plant though. Ja ja ja, get it? Because it's a Japanese automobile manufacturer, not an American one, but Detroit is like the home of American automobile manufacturers. Gosh, is anybody else seeing this? Seriously, I am so smart, it's not even funny. That was another joke, hoo-ah! Hey-yo! Shit.

Also, I didn't get to take part in an old Detroit tradition of murdering somebody. Oh well, maybe next time I'll visit 8 Mile road and get to take part in the festivities. Only in the name of tradition of course.

All in all, it was a great stay in Japan...I mean Detroit.

EDIT: P.S. Did I mention the tram?

Italian-Americans Still Reeling From World Cup Victory

noreply@blogger.com (BrianLaesch.com) — Fri, 10 Nov 2006 08:16:00 +0000

I’ve come to realize that most Italian-Americans (the two I’ve come into contact with lately) are still really excited about Italy’s World Cup victory this Summer…even though it’s November. They are American citizens, born and raised, yet they seem to be really excited and want to shove it in the USA’s face…but they live here. I guess I’ll never get it. I guess I’ll also never care about soccer or “futbol del mundo” either. You can taunt me as much as you want about America’s below-average showing in the World Cup, but it won’t affect me.

My question is: When the next World Cup rolls around in 2010, instead of rooting for the good ol’ U.S., should I be rooting half the time for Germany and half the time for England? And then, if Germany or England wins, be only half-excited and do a half-ass celebration? And then, should I shove it in “the American’s” faces, only half of the time that I feel like it? Even in November? And will I go around after the World Cup victory, of either England or Germany, and boast about how “America sucks,” and how I’m going to move to England/Germany for half the year because of it?

Uhhh…no. I like basketball.

Brian Laesch, the most cultured Midwesterner in the history of America, at least, by modern media standards.

Viral Brian

noreply@blogger.com (BrianLaesch.com) — Fri, 10 Nov 2006 08:12:00 +0000

I decided to post a few of my videos from YouTube. Here are two of them. One is one of my favorites and the other is the newest one. You’ll notice that most of my videos are just me, a true one-man-show. Why? Because all of my “collaborators” either don’t live in LA or are married now. Damn, I wish I had friends.

One of my favorites:

I made three of these during the 2006 NBA Playoffs. I guarantee that Steve Nash decided to shave his head after watching these videos. I’ll be making more soon. I won’t have to wear the wig anymore though.

My newest video:

I was “inspired” to make this video after renting The Aristocrats from Netflix and watching half of it. I made this video and then forced myself to watch the rest of the film. Surprisingly, it did get better. Luckily, I made this video before it did, because the first half of the film pissed me off.

Brian Laesch hopes to have friends in Los Angeles the next time he busts out the digital camcorder.

You know what sucks about the new 'Borat' moviefilm?

noreply@blogger.com (BrianLaesch.com) — Fri, 10 Nov 2006 08:09:00 +0000

The fact that now, nobody will believe me when I tell them that I dressed up as “Borat,” two years ago for Halloween, even if I show them the pictures. I’ve been an Ali G/Borat/Bruno and Sacha Baron Cohen fan for years, but now that he’s mainstream, and in a big way, dressing up as any of his characters is no longer a cool Halloween costume. Well, it’s probably stil pretty cool but just imagine how many people probably dressed up as Borat for Halloween yesterday. It’s definitely not original anymore. It kind of was when I did it two years ago though. Isn’t that awesome?

In your face, everybody who dressed up as Borat for Halloween ‘06.

Picture Note: Yes, this is me toasting myself dressed as "Borat" in 2004.

Brian Laesch is a writer who contributes to writing blogs that nobody really needs to read.

Welcome to Brian Laesch's Blog

noreply@blogger.com (BrianLaesch.com) — Fri, 10 Nov 2006 08:05:00 +0000

Hi, my name is Brian Laesch. You may know me from such hits as…well nothing yet, unless you are a fan of me from Myspace or some other, really random social networking site. Other than that, unless you are my parents or one of my friends, you probably don’t know much about me. (Actually, I take that back, you may be one of the few, miscellaneous fans of my old blog, drunkblogger.com. It wasn’t bad, but I didn’t like where it was headed so it was time to move on.)

Well here is some info about me: I grew up in Central Illinois, Bloomington to be exact. I went to Arizona State University where I basically partied for four years and didn’t do much else (except graduate on time…somehow). It was actually unfair to the rest of the country how much I partied there. I felt like somewhere, a kid at a small liberal arts college in Wisconsin was probably doing double the studying because of it. You know, like some kind of weird, academic karma…or not. Really though, it’s not that I was an alcoholic, but if I hadn’t known that “it was all just a college thing,” I would have been on the path to being one. Can’t complain about my time spent at ASU at all though, except for the part about learning stuff.

After graduating, I spent a meaningless summer in Tempe, followed by a 1 1/2 month move back to Indiana (where my parents had moved), then moved back to Arizona for an internship I was offered…pretty much the day I got back. I stayed there for 4 months, got what I needed out of the internship and moved on to LA, where I’ve been struggling somewhat and just figuring this whole city out, up to this point, 2 1/2 years later. While I’m not done, I’ve finally reached a point where it’s time to go get it. I’ve learned a lot since moving to LA. The cliche: a lot about myself. I’ve found myself. The reality: a lot about the entertainment industry, the bullshit in this town, and the fact that honestly, nobody knows anything. (I technically stole the “nobody knows anything” part from a successfull screenwriter, but it’s a pretty general statement, and it’s so on the dot that I can’t say it any better way. Besides, it’s not like he, uhh, like, used big words or something. He can’t sue me.)

So that’s where I am now, taking myself seriously, finally, and getting my life going. I’m very interested to find out where I’ll be a year from now, and I hope you are too. But if not, I understand. You just don’t know me...not yet at least.