And since this place is already in contract, Redfin isn’t showing it anymore. Helloooooo, Trulia!

1650 Morton Ave
Los Altos, CA 94024
$1,388,000

4 bed / 3 full bath
2,588 sqft
Single-Family Home
Active Contingent
$6,215 / mo
25 days on Trulia
Built in 1955
Neighborhood: South Los Altos
MLS/Source ID: 81317816

1650 Morton Ave DIAMOND IN THE ROUGH-UPGRADE TO YOUR TASTE! This home was extensively remodeled and expanded in 2000. A guest room wing with two separate entrances was added and much of the original house was rebuilt. The finishes and details need attention, but the bones are good. If you have the vision to imagine your own finishes and colors in place, you could polish this into the gem of the neighborhood, and what a fine neighborhood it is. The kitchen features maple cabinets and a comfortable breakfast area. Granite slab counters would complete the kitchen makeover (and we have a bid of just under $10,000 to supply and install… these). The bathrooms are dated; in fact, the guest bath is so dated it is 1950′s retro! The house would benefit from interior paint, new windows, extending the wide plank hardwood floors from the living/dining areas or adding new carpet, and bathroom updating. Located on a spacious corner lot of over 10,000 feet, the parcel includes two majestic redwoods, three mature oaks, and three soap bark trees. The trees are near the property perimeter so you can develop the rest of the parcel as you choose. The landscape details and final design are up to you. Priced to allow the new owner the ability to integrate all the details and finishes you desire and still enjoy a valuable acquisition.

Now that is one chatty agent. This one went on for more than three picture’s worth of listing copy! Can you imagine having to get in the car and go on a house tour with that dude?  You’ll be glad you brought your earbuds!  Now let’s hear from LOL RBA.

Now wait… I have noticed a pattern in Los Altos. Every nice house gets listed for $1495, or $1498… Then sell then sells for $1750 – $1800. Every not so nice house gets listed for $1150 and sells for around $1300. What on earth is this terrifying listing? Rebuilt in 2000? Wha’?? What did they rebuild? And is this a nice house, destined to sell for $1750 (um…no) or a not so nice house that will sell for $1300, thereby getting no overbids? Regardless, the house will be in escrow within 7 days, like everything else in the RBA.

I love your blog. My favorite stop with my morning coffee. Your fan.  Sent from my iPad

You know you’re in the Real Bay Area when even the little old ladies correspond with an iPad. And LOL-RBA was correct about the 7 day escrow, or was it more like 7 minutes?

Hey, for a hundred year old house in the East Bay, this is a possible solution to cramped quarters.  Now imagine what this would look like if some la-di-da designer got ahold of this idea and tried staging it to attract some Twithead with more money than taste or sense.  It would probably look like today’s featured listing.

Thanks very much to Burbed reader Michael Boltonestater for this rip-roaring reboot.

55 Norfolk St #101
San Francisco, CA 94103
$599,000

HOA Dues: $400/mo.
1 Beds
1 Baths
— Sq. Ft.
Built: 1995
Lot Size: —
On Redfin: 17 days
Status: Active
HOA Dues: $400/month
Style: Modern/High Tech
County: San Francisco
Property Type: Live/Work Unit, Loft Condominium
Community: South of Market
MLS#: 408810

Think Big in this modern SoMa loft! Polished concrete floors, west-facing industrial windows, soaring ceilings make this live/work space special. Floor-to-ceiling glass windows w/ sliding door leads to private outdoor garden. Fire engine red spiral staircase leads mezzanine Master Suite w/ new carpeting, industrial railings, closet. Rare and unusual Winnebago nook creates a private, enclosed space. Kitchen w/ maple cabinetry, stainless steel backsplash, gas range, dishwasher, microwave. Full bathroom and storage area. Deeded parking and laundry in garage. Located at the western edge of SOMA, 55 Norfolk provides the best of SoMa nightlife, dining, shopping, tech companies. Access to shuttle buses, 101, and Bay Bridge makes commuting easy.

Hope you caught that: Access to shuttle buses. That means Google and Facebook, too!  Now, check out the rate and unusual Winnebago nook.

Not too many listing photos have to come with safety warnings, either.

You can tell from this view that unlike the Castro Valley house, this SF loft/condo had to cut things down. You’re only getting a quarter of a Winnebago. Maybe 3 other units also get the “rare and unusual” nook.

Note that the house with the entire RV went for above asking.

Study: How Using Homes as ATMs Fueled Foreclosures

By Nick Timiraos, The Wall Street Journal
May 28, 2013, 11:58 AM

The conventional wisdom of the housing crisis goes something like this: Too many people bought homes as the housing bubble inflated. Some were unlucky in their timing, while others overextended themselves by putting too little money down. All of these top-of-the-market purchases led to an explosion of foreclosures once home prices dropped sharply and the economy hit the skids.

Amid the current debate about whether a new bubble is forming in the housing market, it’s worth looking at a paper published in March that challenges conventional wisdom by showing that a significant share of foreclosures came from people who bought their homes before 2004.

So why did so many people who bought their homes before the housing bubble fully inflated end up losing their homes anyway?

The paper concludes that if only California had laws like Texas (which forbids borrowing more than 80% of home equity), not only would fewer FBs gotten F’ed, but homeowners (as opposed to homedebtors) would have had more money to spend because houses wouldn’t have cost so much.

Which is ridiculous, because why do you think these FBs borrowed all that equity in the first place? They sure as heck didn’t invest it in infrastructure.  Heck, no.  They spent it.  We’re cheered to see Larry Roberts (OC Housing News) agrees with us.

Then again, that study also says people defaulted because (among other reasons) they assumed their home prices would keep going down. This shows why the study was in Los Angeles instead of the Real Bay Area. Everyone knows in the RBA, prices only go up.

There’s also a very important reveal in the paper. Laufer’s model shows that home prices would be 14% lower if all that equity extraction hadn’t taken place. And as we know, the Real Estate industry will simply not allow that to happen.  They might as well throw away tax-deductibility of mortgage interest too.

Fortunately, in the Real Bay Area, people do not display amateur carvings of naked women mated to boat prows.  You’re far more likely to find a pinball machine or an open wire closet than hundreds of dollars of wood that would be better used as high-quality flooring.

Let us know what you find in this weekend’s open house visits, because this is your weekend’s Open Thread.  Feel free to open your shirt, lean back and stay a while.

Thanks very much to Christin’s Redfin Collections page Just Wow for featuring this… work of… bark.

Today’s entry will start your weekend off well.  While Game of Thrones just finished its third season on HBO, you can play the game on the Peninsula! Thanks very much to Burbed reader waiting_for_the_fall for this fantastic installment!

96 PARKVIEW Ave
Daly City, CA 94014
$489,000

3 Beds
2 Baths
1,150 Sq. Ft.
$425 / Sq. Ft.
Built: 1922
Lot Size: 3,300 Sq. Ft.
On Redfin: 40 days
Property Type: Detached Single Family
Community: ‘Original’ Daly City
MLS#: 81315124
Stories: 1
County: San Mateo

Complete fixer in great Daly City neighborhood. City approved remodel plans in place to create legal 3 bedroom 2 bath. Large corner lot close to transportation and shopping. Detached garage and private, low maintenance yard. Lots of sweat equity in this home ready for the handy buyer!

First let’s have a good look around, especially that low maintenance yard.

What does waiting_for_the_fall have to say about this charming cottage?

I got another one for you.  This one is a real stinker.

Check out the steps up to both toilets.  I’ve heard of toilets called thrones before, but this is taking it a bit too far.  The listing history is like a roller coster.  How can anyone think this crapshack (with toilet thrones!) is worth 489k?!?

If anyone buys this house at the listed price, they are mentally insane.

If everyone is high on bubbly, that’s not mental insanity. That’s a day in the Bay Area that ends with “-y”!  Y for Yes We Are!

Puh-leeze, people! Do you really expect those so-called experts to understand the difference between national averages and Real Estate Where It’s Special? Of course not! Those silly “experts” think this isn’t a bubble because prices haven’t hit their pre-crash peaks.  Except if you followed real estate in the Real Bay Area you’d know that they have and they do, every day.  So let’s look at yet another “point of light” illuminating the real estate bubble that we damned well know is blowing up a little bigger every day in the RBA, Where It’s Special.

And even where it isn’t. Because today we’re looking at overbidding in Oakland.  Thanks very much to Burbed reader Bob in Oakland for the find.

3239 MONTEREY Blvd
Oakland, CA 94602
$840,000

5 Beds
3.5 Baths
4,971 Sq. Ft.
$169 / Sq. Ft.
Built: 2002
Lot Size: 8,755 Sq. Ft.
On Redfin: 104 days
Status: Active
Property Type: Detached Single Family
Community: Alameda County
MLS#: 81306257
Stories: 2
County: Alameda

Large beautiful home with a fantastic view!

This home may be large and beautiful, but the agent thoughtfully kept things simple by not including any photos other than the one you see right here. Now if that isn’t proof of a real estate bubble, we don’t know what to tell you. This house is telling you, you want an almost 5,000 square foot house? Well you can bloody well submit your overbid and hope you get to see the inside, then!

Did we say overbid? More like over-overbid, because last week the price got cranked up from $550k to $840k despite There’s No Bubble Here.

And if you’re wondering how the heck there’s almost 5,000 sf of house in this modest façade, have a look at the satellite photo. Looks like the builder went deep. Real deep. Also there’s another floor under the driveway, which means you’d best check the drainage.

Bunus: That’s a freeway in the bottom right corner: Lucky number 13!

1113 REMINGTON Ct
Sunnyvale, CA 94087
$1,199,999

4 Beds
2.5 Baths
2,006 Sq. Ft.
$598 / Sq. Ft.
Built: 1975
Lot Size: 6,527 Sq. Ft.
On Redfin: 11 days
Status: Active
Property Type: Detached Single Family
Stories: 1
Community: Sunnyvale
MLS#: 81318908

Huge electrical tower in front of house. House has additional bedrooms and baths, half garage has been converted to a studio, all done professionally without permits

We feel cheated.  There’s a huge electrical tower in front of the house and the listing photo doesn’t even show it. Why mention such an important feature if you’re not going to show it off?

You’re welcome.

Bunus: Look what we found on Zillow.  All we were trying to do is figure out what they were asking for this place in 2012 when it went pending twice but never actually changed hands. 

We’re pretty confident this place will be selling shortly.

143 WISTERIA Dr
East Palo Alto, CA 94303
$375,000

3 Beds
1 Baths
1,060 Sq. Ft.
$354 / Sq. Ft.
Built: 1952
Lot Size: 5,000 Sq. Ft.
On Redfin: 6 days
Property Type: Detached Single Family
Stories: 1
Community: East of U.S. 101
MLS#: 81319639
Style: Traditional
View": Neighborhood
County: San Mateo

Attention all first time buyers!!! Diamond in the rough!! "The Gardens Home" Hardwood floors throughout, 3 bedrooms, 1 bath, 1060 square feet on a 5000 square foot lot. Minutes from highway 101, Dumbarton and IKEA. This is a great started home in a well maintained neighborhood!!!

Check it out!

Great started home indeed!  Plus, we got 3/4 of a Dude Hanging Out in that… um…guest house.  Which we are absolutely sure has all required permits.  Uh huh.

And you know that by “win” we still mean the exact opposite of “win.”

1764 NEWELL Ave
Walnut Creek, CA 94595
$734,900

3 Beds
2 Baths
1,977 Sq. Ft.
$372 / Sq. Ft.
Built: 1948
Lot Size: 9,504 Sq. Ft.
On Redfin: 172 days
Status: Pend-REO
Type: Detached
Stories: 1
County: Contra Costa
Style: Ranch
Community: Parkmead
MLS#: 40598733

This custom home has over 2000 sq ft of living space located in the heart of Parkmead. Home features an open floorplan, custom tile entry way, hardwood floors, sunroom (permits unknown) and updated master bath. The backyard has a in-ground pool. Call today for more information on this great home!!

Let’s have J check in on why another East Bay property when there are so many deserving listings much closer to Google:

How about a nomination for most trips down Pending Lane? And a few price reductions thrown in for good measure.

Theories? Is it the pool? The unknown sunroom permits? Can’t be the freeway noise since it’s at least a block away. The house is on a busy street but just doesn’t look so terrible. What am I missing?

Oh, sure, anyone can take a trip down Pending Lane if all you have to do is lounge around on the bank’s inventory.  And anyone can take multiple trips if the house isn’t in the Real Bay Area. RBA houses are in such demand that pushy buyers are known to force their way into bank VPs’ offices at gunpoint and demand they sell them the house at 10% over asking.

What, you think real bank robbers would hit a place like Cupertino?  And if they did, they sure as heck wouldn’t dare try Los Altos.

As to the house: 8 days too soon to call this an Old LIsting. Lot’s 496 feet too small to be “big.”  But, ah, the photos.  We’re talking win.

Thanks very much to Burbed reader Petsmart Groomer for sending in the second article.

Affordability is measured as a mortgage payment at 3.8%, 30 year fixed, on an 1800 sf home at median price per sf divided by local average monthly wage for a worker.

Not only that, Oakland and San Jose metros are the 1-2 punch of year over year housing price increases, greater than every other Top 100 metro that Trulia examined.  San Francisco is also showing frightening gains at 19.6%, right behind Orange County.

But remember, 8s are very, very lucky.  Tell us how you feel about so many California cities on the Least Affordable List?  Are you going to keep renting or are you determined to get out there and overbid?

The Wall Street Cheat Sheet piece conveniently left our old nemesis Manhattan and environs off its list by completely ignoring it. After all, if you can’t increase housing prices by double digits, what the heck are you doing calling yourself unaffordable?

Now, what are we going to do about Honolulu? We’d better get those median housing prices up past a million in at least 15 more cities by next week!