BurntHam

Bee Vision

2012-01-26T12:42:00.000-08:00

Did you know that the same hexagonal pattern that exists in honeycomb that bees create is the same pattern that is found in a bees’ eye? So what ,right!? Well, from this powerful pattern in nature we learn a valuable lesson that vision directs our actions. What the bee sees, he creates. Likewise, what we see we tend to create. This is an important universal law.

So what is our vision for our lives?

Whether we believe it or not, our vision and what we see has a dramatic influence on what we do and who we become. If we are able to envision the accomplishment of our goals and dreams then we are much more likely to achieve them. On the other hand, if all we can see is what is currently right in front of us, we will be unlikely to ever achieve what we have the capacity to achieve.

A bee sees through hexagonal eyes before creating the hexagonal honeycomb. Like the bee, what we see is what we create. If we are not seeing what we want to become then we must look up and find within ourselves the capacity to see beyond our current limitations and failures. Those that are able to see beyond today and hold in their mind a positive vision or picture of the future will be much more likely to realize their goals.

If we see success than most likely success will become our reality however if we can’t see it, it will become much more difficult to achieve it. Our vision provides us with inspiration and motivation to work hard and if we can truly see it, it will guide our actions today. For what we see, we become.

Do you have bee vision?

Hopefully each of us has a vision for our future and hopefully that vision is so much on our mind that it is what we see. Holding the vision close and truly seeing it gives us the opportunity to create it. This is what I call bee vision.

It is Your Life--Own it!

2012-01-19T06:33:00.001-08:00

Recently I gave a talk on ownership at a leadership conference. How different would our families, our communities, our nation, our world be if each of us took ownership for our actions, attitudes, behaviors and results!

Ownership is at the heart of successful people. People who realize and believe that they can indeed control their actions, attitudes, behaviors, and outcomes in life have such a deeper, richer, and more satisfying life. Those who take ownership for their mistakes will look to improve and learn from those mistakes and be better.

Unfortunately we live in a society that seems to encourage us to shift blame and point the finger. Rather than take ownership we search for excuses of why we’ve come up short. Rather than take action and accountability we waste our time deceiving ourselves while trying to deceive others.

Ownership is much like the “window and the mirror” philosophy of great leaders found in the book Good to Great by Jim Collins. Great leaders look in the mirror when things are not going well and try to figure out what they can do better to produce better results. Likewise, when things are going well, they look out the mirror to give praise to others and good luck. Contrastingly, poor leaders look out the window when things are going bad and seek to blame something out side of themselves for the poor performance and when things go well, they look in the mirror praising themselves. Too many of us fall into this type of thinking however it would greatly benefit us to look in the mirror when things are not going as well as we’d like and out the window when life is better than expected. Regardless if it is always our fault when things go poorly, having this attitude and living this philosophy will be a great benefit to us.

Finally, it is sad to me when we allow others to “control” us. For example, if my boss treats me poorly and in turn I have a bad attitude all day at work and then continue with it at home, who can I blame? The truth is, my boss didn’t force me to have a bad attitude. I made that decision. Allowing people the ability to “control” what only we can truly control is insanity. If we have a bad attitude, or behave poorly, or don’t reach our goals, regardless of what others have done to us, we can only blame ourselves.

As we take ownership of our lives, we will be much happier and more successful. Get rid of the blame game and enjoy the peace and excitement that comes from living a life of ownership—a life that you control! The day we believe we are fully responsible for our outcomes in life is the day we become free and the day we can begin to improve our results. Enjoy the life that comes with ownership!

It's Your Ship

2012-01-12T04:03:00.000-08:00

It’s Your Ship is a leadership book written by Captain D. Michael Abrashoff and is based on his experiences in the navy with a focus on his leadership practices as the captain of the USS Benfold. Below are some of the main points of emphasis found in the book that I believe if applied, can help us all to be more effective leaders, and help us more successfully guide our ship.

#1 Simplicity

Captain Abrashoff mentions at many times that good leadership requires doing simple things well. He writes “the art of leadership lies in simple things.” Sometimes we believe that in order to be great leaders we have to do big things to motivate and inspire others but we are reminded time and time again in this book that simple things produce great results. For example, Captain Abrashoff allowed younger enlistees to tour the ship when visitors came aboard when it was common practice for the Captain or some other high ranking officer to provide these tours. This simple act had a profound impact on his crew. Thus as leaders, we too can focus on the little things that can have a big difference on the performance of our team.

#2 Empowerment

It is emphasized over and over again in this book how Captain Abrashoff empowered his team to make decisions. He writes “The most effective managers work hard at showing people how to find their own solutions and then get out of their way.” During his time as Captain, it seems he was never caught peering over his crew member’s shoulders but instead trusted them with great responsibilities. Captain Abrashoff confesses that in many cases he was nervous as he stood back and allowed his people to take responsibility but in the end, they always seemed to perform well and gain confidence. Likewise, when we truly empower our people we open the door to a much higher level of success. People want to feel trusted and they want to do a good job. Showing this trust as a leader and allowing our people flexibility and decision making authority will strengthen our team and end in better performance.

#3 Others Focus

Many high ranked leaders are focused on themselves but Captain Abrashoff strongly emphasizes that the best leaders are focused on others. Rather than seek for praise or recognition for one’s self, truly great leaders look for praise for their team and others. Captain Abrashoff writes, “A great leader puts other’s performance ahead of their ego. Never once do anything to promote yourself…”. By doing this, we gain the trust and respect of our team which is essential in our ability to lead them. When people feel and know you are looking out for them, they will go the extra mile for you. Having a focus on others rather than self significantly magnifies our ability to be successful leaders.

I believe these suggestions applied will greatly enhance our leadership ability. In the end, as the title suggests, ultimately it is ‘our ship’ and we can decide how effective we will become as leaders.

To see how I ranked this book click here

Start the Year Off with a BANG!

2012-01-05T04:28:00.000-08:00

“I am so thoroughly convinced that if we don’t set goals in our life and learn how to master the techniques of living to reach our goals, we can reach a ripe old age and look back on our life only to see that we reached but a small part of our full potential. When one learns to master the principles of setting a goal, he will then be able to make a great difference in the results he attains in this life.”
M. Russell Ballard

Ok, so this may come as no surprise to anyone but the best way to start off the New Year with a BANG is to set goals! Hopefully this is still a tradition for many of us and hopefully we believe we can accomplish our New Years’ goals. I believe goal setting and achieving is a critical habit that must be cultivated in order to reach our full potential. As we set new goals this time of year, below are some ideas that will help us achieve them.

#1 Love it

Do you love your goal? Are you fully committed to it? Many of us fail to achieve our goals because we struggle to love what we are trying to accomplish. And this is understandable as some of our goals require us to do things we do not care for or give up things we really like! But in order to really accomplish a goal we must love it! Though we may not actually love the action required to achieve the goal, hopefully we have faith that we will love what the end results will be as we work toward the goal. Learning to find a way to love our goal will help us obtain it.

#2 Work Hard

The best way to achieve a goal is to work hard to accomplish it. Too many of us set goals than refuse to put forth much effort or sacrifice to obtain it. When we set goals, we must realize that in most instances, if it is a stretch goal, it will require hard work, time and effort to achieve it. So as you set goals, decide if you are willing to work hard to realize it.

#3 Scale the Wall and Form a Habit

There should be some initial push back and build up along the goal accomplishment path. This is normal. Many of us start out “gun-ho” and then fade. Those who persist through the initial high then letdown phases will develop habits that will increase success. For example, if my goal is to run 25 minutes every day, I may be excited for the first week but then a letdown will come and I will begin to wonder if the goal is worth it, whether I have enough time, whether it is too cold outside, etc. When these ideas of self-doubt come, it is our clue that it is time to push through and form a habit. Many people are stopped from success because they refuse to scale the wall of letdown. Once you climb over it a few times however, a habit is formed and the goal becomes much easier and more likely to be obtained.

#4 Evaluate

Evaluating our time is important. Is what we are doing adding value to what we hope to accomplish? Many of us simply waste too much time and this interferes with our ability to accomplish our goals. If you seem stuck, or are not making progress toward your goal, stop and list the things you are doing and then determine if they are contributing to the accomplishment of your goals or not. Evaluating our time and using it wisely toward things that help us reach our goals will go a long way in helping us be successful.

#5 Track

Last but not least is tracking our progress. We must know at any given time how we are doing. Without a scoreboard, it becomes very difficult to achieve our goals. Thus find a way that works for you to track your progress as frequently as possible. Tracking progress will lead to success.

Start now to develop your ability to set and reach goals. Doing so will have a tremendously positive impact on your life. Here is to a prosperous and successful 2012—start it off with a BANG!

An Older Brother's Gift

2011-12-22T04:53:00.001-08:00

I thought this Christmas story was touching and appropriate for this special time of year. Enjoy and Merry Christmas!!

By Ada Foy
It was the Christmas season of 1994. Nine-year-old Jaron and his six-year-old brother, Parker, were excited. They had entered a reading contest sponsored by a grocery store in their hometown. The two students who read the most books would each win a brand-new bicycle. All they had to do was have their parents and teachers sign for each book they read. Two bikes were to be awarded, one for the first-to-third-grade levels, and one for the fourth-to-sixth-grade levels.

Parker was especially excited because this was a way for him to earn a bike. He really wanted one. He was tired of watching his older brother ride around on the new purple ten-speed bike he had earned by working at a yard sale. Parker thought that it would be great to earn a bike of his own by reading books. So he started to read books as fast as he could. He read Curious George, Green Eggs and Ham, and Brown Bear, Brown Bear. But no matter how many books he read, someone in his grade level had read more.

Meanwhile, Jaron had not been all that enthusiastic about the contest. When he went to the grocery store and checked the big chart with all the readers listed and how many books each had read, however, he could see that his younger brother had little chance of winning the contest.

Touched with the true meaning of Christmas, the joy of giving, he decided to do for Parker what he could not do for himself. So Jaron put away his own bike and, library card in hand, went to work. He read and read. He read when he wanted to ride his bike. He read as much as eight hours a day. The thrill of perhaps having such a wonderful gift to give kept him going.

The day came when the final lists were to be turned in. Jaron’s mother took him to the store, and he turned in his list, then admired the prize-winners bikes on display.

The store manager watched him admire the shiny red twenty-inch bike. “I suppose that if you win the contest,” the manager said, “you’ll want the larger bike, won’t you?”
Jaron looked up at the man’s smiling face and said very seriously, “Oh, no sir. I would like one exactly this size.”

“But isn’t this bike too small for you?”

“No sir—I want to win it for my little brother.”

The man was surprised. He turned to Jaron’s mother and said, “This is the best Christmas story I’ve heard all year!”

Jaron’s mother hadn’t known that he had worked so hard for his little brother. She looked at Jaron with great pride and joy as they went home to await the contest results.

Finally the phone call came! By reading 280 books, Jaron had won! With his parents’ help, he hid the bicycle in his grandma’s basement until Christmas Eve. He could hardly wait to give Parker his gift!

On Christmas Eve, the whole family gathered at Grandma’s home for a special family home evening. Mother told the story of Heavenly Father’s gift to the world of His Son Jesus Christ. Then she told the story of another older brother’s love. Although it wasn’t the great sacrifice the Savior has made for each of us, she said, it was a sacrifice, and it showed how much the older brother loved his younger brother. Parker and his family listened to the story of a brother who had read 280 books to win his little brother a bike.

“My big brother would do something like that for me,” Parker said.

At that, Jaron ran to the other room, where Grandma had moved the bike. The rest of the family proudly grinned while he wheeled out the two-wheeled treasure he had earned for his younger brother. Parker ran over to the bike, and the brothers hugged over the top of it.

To Be or Not to Be is a Very Good Question

2011-12-15T04:45:00.000-08:00

“What lies behind us and what lies before us are tiny matters compared to what lies within us.”
Unknown

Many of my blogs focus on action and on doing something. As important as action is, there is something even more significant than doing and that is being. We can do all the things in the world but if that does not lead us to “be” someone good, than none of it really matters. Our way of being is even more important than what we do.

A lot of what we become does depend on what we do. However often times we “do” with the wrong the attitude and wrong heart. For example, this Christmas I may decide to donate my pay check to the Salvation Army. This would be fantastic however if my motivate is simply to get a tax write off, be recognized in the local paper, and avoid Christmas shopping for others, than perhaps I am not being as generous as I may appear. And thus I will not receive the full benefits of my action. Our state of being is so critical to our success.

So simply doing good with strings attached is good but simply doing good for goodness sake is grand. At times it may behoove each of us to reflect on our actions and determine our motivation behind them. Are we serving others because we truly care about their well-being? Are we smiling to brighten others day? Are we giving of our time because we know how much it may help others? Assessing our motivates behind our actions can help us know if we are truly becoming who we want to be.

The sad truth is that many of us can do a lot of good things without becoming good people. We may profess to be generous, kind, thoughtful, etc. and play the part well in the public eye but when left alone we may behave just the opposite. What we do when we believe no one is watching is a big indicator of what we have become.

I believe most of us have a desire to become good people. Who we are is often determined by our sincere actions and desires. I hope during this time of year that we will strive to “be” rather than simply do, that we will focus on becoming who we want to be rather than achieving what we want to do. I believe doing this will lead to great happiness, success, and satisfaction in life.

The Power of Positive Thinking

2011-12-01T07:01:00.000-08:00

One day, not too long ago, I saw a stack of old books that had been donated to my place of work. One of the titles of the books caught my eye so I immediately picked it up and began reading it. The book was written in 1963 and is called “The Power of Positive Thinking” by Norman Peale. I found that the book was full of wonderful insights and great truths that if applied will help us be more successful leaders and more successful people. Below are three of the main themes found in the book.

#1 Thoughts are Power

Based on the title of the book it is pretty obvious that this is the main theme. Throughout the book the author explains that our thoughts determine who we are, our outcomes in life, our happiness, and our ability to be successful. Controlling our thoughts is such an important practice in our life and too many of us allow our thoughts to hold us back or even sometimes to destroy us. Thus we must become masters of our minds and control what we think about. The author states, “Our happiness or unhappiness depends to an important degree upon the habit of mind we cultivate.” Thus being happy, being successful, and being content starts in our mind. For how we think is what we are. For this reason there is true power in positive thinking.

#2 What we Believe, we Achieve

If you are a fan of the "The Secret", then you will be a fan of this book because the author stresses over and over again how what we picture in our mind becomes our reality. In essence, we create our own reality by the mental pictures we hold on to and by the desires we have. The author states, “When either failure or success is picturized it strongly tends to actualize” and “what the mind profoundly expects, it tends to receive.” The author also refers to this as “imagineering”—for what we imagine in our mind can ultimately become reality. Our vision, and our ability to believe leads to our ability to achieve.

#3 Make Relationships a Priority

We were not meant to come to this world and be alone. Personal achievement is great but helping others achieve greatness is even better. The author stresses that relationships are important and that good, healthy relationship is a desire each one of us has whether we admit to it or not. Learning to get along with others, serve others, and help others leads to success and happiness for us. The author noted that as we help others, others in-turn help us. It is nearly impossible to help someone else without helping ourselves. The author frankly encourages his readers to “Love others and forget yourself” and when we do, we will find the joy in life we are searching for.

I believe there is true power in positive thinking as the title of this book suggests and I believe some of the main points in this book can have a profound influence on each of us for good. By controlling our thoughts, picturing our desires, and caring for others we will find a recipe to realizing our goals and living our dreams.

To see how I ranked this book, click here.

Unleash the Power of Gratitude

2011-11-24T01:55:00.000-08:00

“The longer I live, the more I realize the impact of attitude on life.

Attitude is more important than facts. It is more important than the past, than education, than money, than circumstances, than failure, than success, than what other people think or say or do.

It is more important than appearance, giftedness or skill. It will make or break a company… a church… a home.

The remarkable thing is we have a choice everyday regarding the attitude we will embrace for that day. We cannot change our past…we cannot change the fact that people will act in a certain way. We cannot change the inevitable.

The only thing we can do is play on the one string we have, and that is our attitude.”

Chuck Swindoll

It’s Thanksgiving!! So let me tell you about the power of gratitude. It has been said that our attitude is everything and I believe it is true because in a lot of ways our attitude controls our thoughts that leads to our actions that determines our destiny. And our gratitude has a tremendous ability to improve our attitude.

This November I decided to put it to the test. On Novemeber 1st I began creating a gratitude list. I did this by waking up each morning and writing down five things I am grateful for. Each new day I’d add five new things to the list and watched it grow. Today I have 120 things I am grateful for written down. And it has been amazing how thinking about my blessings changes how I am feeling. I’ve learned from personal experience that gratitude has a significant impact on my attitude and that it greatly improves it without fail.

I believe all of us, no matter how appreciative and sincere we are, take things for granted. It is just our nature to overlook all the good in our lives and all the good that surrounds us and instead focus on the few things that are bad. When we change this though, by expressing true gratitude, our vision expands, our paradigm shifts and our world improves. It seems funny that simply expressing gratitude changes our world!!

If you don’t believe this can be possible give it a try. I challenge you to express more gratitude, reflect on the good that surrounds you, and be more appreciative toward others. This Thanksgiving Holiday, I dare you to take some time to share some true thankfulness just to see how it feels. And I hope that this will lead you to develop a pattern of gratitude that will help you be more successful and more satisfied in life. Unleash the power of gratitude! Happy Thanksgiving!!

It is What it is...Rather it Was What it Was

2011-11-17T04:19:00.000-08:00

“It is what is it…until I change it!”

Whether at work, or at home, or just about anywhere, a very common phrase that I often hear repeated is “It is what it is.” Though used for different reasons in different situations, saying this phrase demonstrates a lack mentality as well as an inability to shape our world. It can imply that there is nothing we can do or could have done about our circumstance or situation and therefore we must settle and learn to deal with “what it is.” I am here to write today that it may be currently “what it is” but that we do not have to accept it—because we have the power within us to change it.

The other day I used this phrase when the results came back from a certain project at work. Though not horrible, the results were less than I was hoping for. After saying this phrase I realized that so much more could have been done to prevent the less than stellar results. I also realized that I did not have to accept these result moving forward and that I could now learn from my mistakes to ensure future results for future projects were improved.

To illustrate another story, recently a friend of mine hoping to receive a promotion at work used this phrase when he failed to gain what he had hoped for. In a state of futility he said it with a look of defeat. I encouraged him not to give up, though at this point he seems to be content with settling with the fate that has been handed him. When we take this approach it may truly remain “what it is,” we need to realize though that it doesn’t have to.

In all honesty I am guilty of using this phrase too often. However, I am now adding to it when I say it. Instead of simply saying the phrase I always add “it is what it is for now but that doesn’t mean I can’t change it!” This builds in my mind the understanding that things can change and that I can shape my own results and outcomes in life. I do not have to settle or accept things I am not satisfied with in my life.

In my experience it often is what it is over a long period of time for two reasons. First, we lack the determination and patience it requires to change “what it is” and second, we lack the confidence that it can be done. One or both of these two things hold us back and truly make it “what it is” for us. But again, we do not have to allow “what it is” to be permanent. Though it may take time and effort to realize our dreams, with a steady focus and determination, knowing we have the ability to accomplish anything we put our mind to, we can eventually always change “what it is.”

One of the simple joys in life is moving this phrase from the present to the past. Through confidence, hard work and sometimes patience, we can change It is what it is to It was what it was until I changed it. The power is within us to achieve our goals and to not settle for anything less.

Time to Give

2011-11-03T04:39:00.000-07:00

“When we help someone climb a mountain, we are nearer to the top ourselves.”
Thomas Monson

One of the greatest secrets in life is the success and happiness that comes from helping others. Giving of our self unconditionally magically creates self-confidence, self-worth, and gratification. It also leads to greater success in life. Simply giving however is not the secret rather it is the way we give that matters.

Many of us give with the idea that we will get something in return. In fact, many give only because they expect something in return. Giving with “strings attached” can create ill feelings—feelings that are exactly opposite of what is normally produced when giving in the right way. Strings attached giving can lead to worry, fear, or anger. We may worry, what if I don’t get the return I expected or what if the clear benefit really doesn’t justify the amount I am giving. When we give with strings attached, we lose the chance to gain the wonderful blessing that come from giving. In fact giving with strings attached creates a lack mentality in our minds which usually leads to unnecessary stress.

On the other hand, when we give unconditionally we enjoy feelings of abundance. These feelings help us feel good about the world, they increase our belief in ourselves, and they make us want to give more. In fact, studies have proven that giving in the right way leads to greater success. I’ve found that giving unconditionally boosts confidence as well as a desire to succeed. It helps us to be optimistic, to feel satisfaction, and gives us a sense of making a “difference” in this world. Though somewhat counterintuitive giving of ourselves freely actually helps us have greater results. For when we give in the right way the good it produces in us always outweighs the sacrifice and effort it took to give.

So, are we giving and helping others? And if so is it with “strings attached” or unconditional? Learning to give in the right way will only help us in the end in achieving our goals and realizing the happiness we seek in life. That is why for us there should always be time to give. Because giving leads to success.

The 80/20 Rule

2011-10-27T04:45:00.000-07:00

Learning to use our time wisely can be one of the most critical habits we develop in order to obtain success and happiness in life. It has been said that 80% or our results in life are attributed to only 20% of what we do. In other words, 80% of our time is essentially wasted or not fully capitalized to achieve success. So what are we doing that is hindering us from producing greater results in life? What do we do with the 80% of our time that is not producing results? Finding this out and then changing what we do with it will help us achieve much greater results in life.

Time is an interesting commodity. Each of us has the same amount of it in a day regardless of our background, wealth, education level, social status, etc. Because of this, time can be a great equalizer. Time can be wasted or invested; it can be savored or squandered. Once time is spent, it can never be taken back or reused. How we spend our time determines our outcomes in life. Thus, it is a shame how many of us willfully waste it. Treating time as a precious gift—for that is exactly what it is—will lead us to greater success.

On the radio we hear songs that encourage us to “live like we were dying.” In other words, the singer of the song is prompting us to fully utilize our time as we don’t really know how much of it we have left. Would you spend your time differently if you only had one year to live? What about one month, or week, or day? With this knowledge, I bet just about each of us would spend our time differently than we do today. Thus, this is good advice. If each of us could spend our time with a sense of urgency, realizing at any moment that our time may be up, we would be much better off.

One simple yet important step to take in order to better use our time is to identify how we spend it. Many of us hardly realize how much time we commit to different
things. Literally keeping a log or writing down or tracking how we spend our time for even a few days can reveal some important clues as to how we can more effectively utilize this valuable gift. As we participate in this exercise, we may be surprised to learn what we are in actuality dedicating our time to is different than what we thought or assumed. Having this knowledge will then help us to change and focus on those things that will help us improve our performance and on those things that matter most.

As a simple side note, I’ve observed that more and more often many of us are distracted by the shimmer of today’s entertainment , media, and technology that we waste countless time on things that produce no results or provide any sense of accomplishment or satisfaction in life. Learning to cut out such distractions and eliminating wasted time, though difficult, will only result in better success in life.

Besides identifying the time we are wasting we also need to learn the “20%” that is accomplishing 80% of our results. What are the most effective ways we spend our time? Once we figure out this secret, which hopefully is fairly easy to recognize once we start paying attention, we must start spending more time doing those things. For those who learn to utilize their precious time effectively eventually will come out on top.

So how do you spend your time? Do you truly know? Is 20% of what you are doing really producing 80% of your results? Finding ways to more effectively use your time will produce greater success and satisfaction in life.

What do we Desire?

2011-10-20T17:37:00.000-07:00

“What we insistently desire, overtime, is what we will eventually become and receive.”
Dallin Oaks

A few months ago I listened to a talk about desire. Our desires in life are so important to our success because they motivate what we do and who we become. When we have appropriate desires, they can lead us to success and happiness in life. Likewise, when our greatest desires are not good things or are not inline with what is truly most important in our lives, they will lead us to failure and misery in life.

Desires determine our priorities in life which ultimately lead to our actions and how we spend our time. Our actions and how we spend our time eventually dictates who we become and what we achieve in life. Therefore, we must be careful in what we most strongly desire. Are the things that matter most to us in life at the top of our list of desires?

For example, I believe for many of us our families are very important. If that is the case, is one of our greatest desires in life to have a happy family? If so, what are we willing to give up or sacrifice to obtain it? If our family is truly important to us, our desire to strengthen our family relationships should be sufficiently intense to motivate us to free ourselves from any habit, attitude, or action that will impede our ability to obtain this desire. Indeed, our greatest desires in life will provoke us to sacrifice and give up other things in order to obtain them.

Perhaps we need to readjust our desires. Doing so is not easy but possible. True desires that will motivate us to change cannot be impulsive, temporary, or superficial but must burn deep in our hearts. Changing our desires requires true commitment, effort, and work. As the desires we are trying to put in the forefront of our lives lead us to action, they will begin to take place deeper in our hearts. Having the strength and discipline to forgo strong but lesser wanted desires will help us change and be better people.

So what do we desire? Are our greatest desires those things that are most important to us in our life? We must be mindful of our desires as they will lead us to our success or failure in life.

5 Steps to Resolving Any Problem

2011-10-13T06:39:00.001-07:00

Solving problems is an important part of everyday life. Those who develop an ability to solve problems quickly and effectively will enjoy more success and satisfaction in life. Below is a list of ideas to help us solve the most difficult problems we face.

#1—Believe Every Problem Has a Solution

In order for us to solve problems, we must believe a solution is possible and that we can overcome it no matter what the problem may be. Without this belief, our ability to effectively and consistently solve problems disappears. Thus, we must believe in a solution as well as in ourselves.

#2—Clear Our Mind and Remain Calm

Too many people can’t solve problems because they are stressed out. Stress decreases our ability to think clearly and effectively. Removing stress by remaining calm and clearing our mind will allow us the greatest opportunity to solve our problems successfully.

I’ve learned two effective ways to help me clear my mind and remain calm. First is writing things down. Writing down the problem on paper gets the problem out of my mind and on to paper. This simple act helps make my mind more clear. I then write down any and every possible solution. This has brought great clarity and calmness to me in difficult situations. Second, I’ve found for me that exercising helps me to think clearly and remain calm. When my body is working hard, my mind becomes free. Finding effective ways to clear your mind and remain calm will greatly enhance our ability to solve problems effectively.

#3—Remove Emotions

Many of our problems are “self-created.” When we remove our emotions from the problems we can more easily see them for what they are. Removing our emotions from the situation will allow us to review the facts impartially and sensibly and will help us best determine how to resolve them.

#4—Be Patient

Solutions don’t always come right away and problems don’t necessarily need to be resolved immediately. Being patient when dealing with a difficult problem often times can be a major key to success. In fact, some problems seem to simply fade away or become resolved with time. Though difficult, learning to be patient with our problems often leads to success.

#5—Seek Help

Sometimes we avoid seeking help for our problems but the truth is, someone who is impartial and can have a different perspective can be a tremendous help in resolving our problems. In fact, perhaps another person has faced a similar problem and can share their experiences of how they overcame it. We should never be afraid or hesitant in seeking help to solve our problems because an “outsiders” view many times can be exactly what we need to solve it.

Learning to effectively handle and resolve problems is so critical to success in life. We all face problems but believing every problem has a solution, clearing our minds and remaining clam, removing our emotions from the situation, being patient, and seeking help from others will help us effectively and consistently overcome them.

Eat the Frog First

2011-10-06T04:33:00.000-07:00

Have you ever been told to eat the frog first? Well that is what I am going to tell you today. Every day, we should live by the philosophy of eating the frog first.

The frog represents the hardest thing we have to do for that day. Whether it is run 5 miles to reach our exercise goal, call our boss to tell him a mistake we made at work, clean out the gutters at home, write a speech for an upcoming event, or apologize to a friend, we should always eat our frog first. Do not procrastinate it, do not delay!!

When we learn to do the most difficult thing for the day first, everything else becomes so much easier. Many people live with unnecessary worry or stress because they delay the inevitable and when they do, they voluntarily subject themselves to personal torture as they agonize over “eating the frog.” Nothing can be worse than eating a frog we have to eat except delaying and waiting and letting it ruin our whole day first before eating it! So much energy and enthusiasm for life is sucked away by us waiting to eat our frogs each day.

It is never fun to eat frogs but when we do, relief and liberation come instantly in to our life. And on some days we have many frogs to eat. On those days, we would be wise to eat the biggest and ugliest first. Once that one is out of the way, the others do not seem quite as bad. We should continue to go down the line until all the frogs are eaten. And once all the frogs are gone we can then go about our day feeling good that the hard things are over with. This will allow us to concentrate so much better and optimize the remainder of our day.

Thus we must rid ourselves of unnecessary worry and stress by eating our frog first every day. When we learn to do this, we can quickly overcome fears and perform at higher levels for the remainder of the day. Though eating frogs first is not easy, getting it out of the way for the day will help us to be better leaders and will help us more fully reach our potential. Buena petit!!

Where is Your Heart?

2011-09-29T08:29:00.000-07:00

“Our failure is not because of a lack of ability but most often because of a lack of conviction. Don’t be afraid to put your whole heart in to something you want to achieve.”

Have you ever wondered why you can’t seem to accomplish those things that you desire most in life? Many times we blame our failure at reaching our goals on our lack of ability. We think I am just not talented enough, or smart enough, or lucky enough to attain what I’d like to achieve in life. The truth is however that most often we do not lack the ability to accomplish our goals, rather we lack the conviction to realize them.

Faith in oneself is so critical to success in life. In fact half the battle in accomplishing our goals and dreams is simply believing that we can. Until we believe, and I mean truly believe, most likely it will never happen. Without a true belief in ourselves, it becomes difficult for us to throw our whole heart into what we are doing. And accomplishing something great nearly always requires our whole heart and energy.

Sometimes we fail to believe or to throw our whole heart in to something because of fear. We fear we might fail. By not putting our whole heart in to something we retain the ability to have excuses when we don’t attain our goal. It becomes so much easier for us to deal with failure by saying ‘oh it wasn’t really that big of a deal’, or ‘I didn’t really try’ or ‘I didn’t want it to interfere with other things in my life.’ Making these kinds of excuses and failing to put our whole heart in to whatever we are trying to accomplish however leaves us empty and unsatisfied. And in the worst cases, it can lead to depression. Thus we cannot afford not to put our whole heart in to what we are doing and even if we fail, we always feel much better about what we have done.

Most of us have goals and things we are trying to accomplish at home, at work, and elsewhere. Putting our whole heart and having true conviction for those things we are trying to accomplish in every aspect of our life makes things sweeter and more enjoyable. Like baking our favorite pie and then never eating it, working toward something without true conviction will leave us unfulfilled. Thus in everything we do, we owe it to ourselves and to others to put our whole heart in to it. And I’ve learned that when we work with conviction in one area of our life, it will help us have conviction and be more successful in other areas of our life. Give it a try.

Unfortunately it has been my experience in life that many people do not put their whole heart in to what they are involved in. And many make excuses as to why they do not but ultimately it is up to us to decide. Regardless of the excuses only we keep ourselves from applying our whole self in to what we are doing and denying ourselves of the satisfaction that comes with such effort. It has also been my experience that those who put their whole heart in to everything they do enjoy a much higher level of satisfaction and success in life.

Thus, we can’t blame our inability in accomplishing our goals on our lack of ability. Instead, we must measure our conviction when striving to achieve them. Do we truly want them? Is our heart in it? If not, than we need to evaluate what we are doing and either change courses so that we can work with conviction or stay the course with a determination to be committed to attaining our goals. I believe this simple truth can have a profound impact on our success in life.

Are you a Critic, Cheerleader, or Coach?

2011-09-15T04:35:00.000-07:00

In life, each of us has the opportunity to positively or negatively impact the people around us through our actions and our “ways of being” toward them. I’ve determined that typically we fall into three categories of how we influence and interact with others. I’ve also learned that we can be in different categories at different times toward the same person based on the given situation and that we may be typically in one category toward one person, such as our spouse, and typically in another category toward another person, such as a friend. No category is necessarily good or bad as all can potentially be both simply based on the situation and how we handle ourselves. Learning to know when to be each one in dealing with different situations and different people is the tricky part but doing so effectively can lead to great success in building relationships and motivating others. Below are the categories we typically fall in to when influencing others.

The Critic

First is the critic. The critic is constantly finding what is wrong. He points out faults, is careful not to make mistakes himself or show any weaknesses, and he judges and makes assumptions often. The critic is often someone that seems a little distant or closed minded. The critic is often harsh, deflating, and usually seems to be in an unpleasant mood. The critic seems oblivious to any good. As you can guess, many people do not like being around the critic but the critic can challenge us to view ourselves honestly and help us improve. There may be times when we all need critics to be our best. If not careful, being the critic often can potentially have a very negative impact on others.

The Cheerleader

Second is the cheerleader. The cheerleader is constantly cheering others on. Unlike the critic, the cheerleader points out only the good and ignores the bad. The cheerleader is nearly always positive and can inspire us to be better. The cheerleader has a way of being positive regardless if things are going good or bad. It may come as a surprise but the cheerleader can have both a positive and negative affect on others based on the situation and person because at times the cheerleader can create a false sense of reality and impede us from facing the brutal facts. Most of us like the cheerleader and want to be around them and many of us can use cheerleaders to help us through difficult times.

The Coach

Third is the coach. The coach is honest, open, and rational. The coach sees the bad and wants to help correct it but he also applauds the good frequently. The coach sacrifices for the good of others, sometimes risking short-term gains, friendships, and moments for long-term results. At times a coach can be annoying and challenging to work with but in the end, the coach is usually well liked and respected. The coach most often has a positive impact on others but not always. The coach can drive people to great results while helping them to feel good about their accomplishments.

Which way of being are we most often toward others? How about towards those we care about most in life? Analyzing these three categories can help us in our relationships and in our ability to be better leaders. At times people may need a critic, at times a cheerleader and at times a coach. Learning to know how and when to effectively be all three at different times and in different situations will greatly help us to be excellent relationship builders and outstanding leaders. Good luck!

Burntham Rewind: Wickedly Successful

2011-09-08T04:23:00.000-07:00

This blog was originally posted on Burntham.com March 24, 2010.

Recently while visiting New York I had the opportunity to attend the Broadway musical Wicked. The show was extremely entertaining and I loved it! One of the reasons I enjoyed it so much is because I feel there are a lot of important life lesson taught in the play. Today I would like to share four life lessons that can be learned from Wicked.

# 1 “Dancing Through Life”

One of the main characters in the show claims and encourages others to “dance through life.” Essentially what he means by this is that people should not worry about their actions or take anything in life seriously. In fact this character suggests that life is essentially pointless and believes the only way to live is to do whatever you feel like doing at any given moment. Unfortunately, I believe many in life retain this philosophy and fail to realize that living like this usually results in unhappiness and failure. Contrary to this characters belief, life has consequences. For this reason, we should be very conscious about our actions and decisions. Good decisions and actions lead to success and happiness where poor decisions and actions lead to failure and frustration. Further in the story, this character learns that what he once believed about life is not true, and he changes. He learns that life’s choices do have consequences and impact our results and happiness in life.

#2 “Accepting Limits”

At one point in the story the main character has an epiphany, and she realizes she had been limiting herself based on “societal boundaries” and what others told her she could and could not do. Many times we believe what society or others say about our abilities or possibilities as well, and thus we allow them to limit us—to prevent us from achieving greatness. Like this character, we must realize our future is “unlimited”, and we have the ability to achieve whatever we set our hearts to. Much like this character, we must come to believe in ourselves and realize we can “defy gravity” by accomplishing our dreams and goals. We can truly do amazing things when we overcome perceived limits or roadblocks that often only exist in our minds.

#3 “Be Careful What you Wish For”

Another character in the show receives presumably everything she ever wanted, yet she realizes there is still an emptiness inside or a lack of satisfaction. The reason is she selfishly went about obtaining the desires of her heart while disregarding all others. Thus, in the process of obtaining her number one objective, she sacrificed other things that were more important to her. Once she comes to this realization, she is very sorrowful and realizes perhaps her number one goal was not worth the cost. We can learn from her example by evaluating our goals to ensure they are inline with what is most important to us--so we don’t look back and regret what we sacrificed to obtain what we thought seemed important but really isn’t. We can also learn that although we can accomplish anything we set our heart to, it should never be at the expense of others. Finally, we can learn that to truly be successful and happy we must often put others first; and when we do, good things happen.

#4 “Things are Not as they Seem”

The overall lesson of this show is that things are not always as they seem. In the show, which is a spinoff from the Wizard of Oz, we learn that the supposed Wicked Witch of the West was not wicked at all, and that the “good” witch was not as good as perception would indicate. Thus, we can learn we must not be quick to assume or pass judgment; for often perception is not reality, and what we believe to be true may be just the opposite. Thus, we should learn that whenever possible we must be careful and strive to obtain facts before jumping to conclusions or passing harsh judgments on others unjustly. For often times, things are not as they seem.

Wicked is a great show with many great important life lessons that we can learn from. If we will strive to do more than simply dance through life, if we will believe our future is unlimited, if we will be careful of what we wish for, and if we will seek first to understand and not judge, our lives will be happier and we will be wickedly successful.

Burntham Rewind: Surviving and Thriving in Difficult Times

2011-09-01T04:09:00.000-07:00

This blog was originally posted on Burntham.com November 26,2008.

“When it is dark enough, you can see the stars.”
Ralph Emerson

With our economy in peril, unemployment rates rising, and war raging around the world, it is easy to understand why so many people find themselves in a state of shock, fear, and confusion. Feelings of despair and hopelessness can easily consume us and destroy us during difficult times if we allow them to. However, we do not need to be defeated during difficult times. In fact, we can choose to thrive! Really, the choice is ours.

During the most difficult and desperate times in our lives, rather than despair, we need to increase our hope by taking action and pressing forward. We must not allow despair and fear to cripple us to “in-action”, but instead we must take action! In fact, we can get excited during difficult times, because they present us with the greatest opportunities for personal growth and success. Having perseverance and hope during difficult times will help us to succeed even in the most perilous times of our lives.

Perseverance

The old adage of “press on” has never been more important to each of us. As leaders, we must keep our heads held high and move forward with quiet determination and perseverance in spite of what may be going on around us. Setting goals, nurturing our hope and confidence, and surrounding ourselves with a positive support group will help us to persevere. Those who are most persistent and have the will to take action time and time again despite difficult circumstances are those people who are most successful in life. Never giving up through perseverance is essential during times of difficulty.

Hope

There is reason to have hope as well. When times are tough it is time to grow. I recently read that in Chinese, the word “crisis” is written by using two characters that represent danger and opportunity. Difficult situations may be dangerous, but they present us with an opportunity to show our resolve and push ourselves to greater achievements. Just as “smooth seas do not make skillful sailors,” a life without challenges does not produce a great person. History is full of tough times and major setbacks, and it is also full of people who overcame extreme challenges to come out on top. Indeed, many people have made their mark on history by taking action during their most dire circumstances. Hope and action are critical to success during difficult times!

In the end, the personal problems we may be facing and the challenges of our country and our world are not a reason to fear and despair, but they are instead a call to action—a challenge to each of us to do better, to push ourselves, to try harder, work smarter, and be prepared. We must persevere and retain hope by taking action each day to better our situation. We must prove we’ve not given up or given in by our lack of action, but instead we must go and do! With hope, action, and perseverance, we will be able to ride out challenging times in our lives and come out better than ever before. The choice is ours!

Opportunity in Difficulty

2011-08-25T17:49:00.000-07:00

“What is the difference between an obstacle and an opportunity? Our attitude toward it. Every opportunity has a difficulty, and every difficulty has an opportunity.”
J. Sidlow Baxter

In life, each one of us is faced with challenges, trials, and hardships. None of us are immune. Thus, we have the opportunity to react to our troubles in one of two ways. We can become discouraged, upset, and resentful; or we can see them as an opportunity and strive to grow, learn, and become a stronger, better person. The choice is ours. Below are some thoughts on how we can best utilize our difficulties to our advantage.

Reflection

One way that I’ve learned to deal with challenges in my life is to always remember that no matter how bad it gets, there is always someone out there that has it harder than I do. When I think about that, it helps me to turn my attention to what I do have. This produces feelings of gratitude and thankfulness despite the hardship. Reflecting on what we do still have, even when we feel a difficulty has taken just about everything from us, will help us navigate troubled waters successfully.

Perspective

Having positive thoughts and viewing trials appropriately will go a long way in our ability to handle them successfully. Rather than asking “why me?” we should perhaps ask “why not me?” We can also say “I’m glad it is me and not my child, or spouse, or good friend.” Other positive thoughts that may help when dealing with difficulties in life are “this will make me stronger” and “what can I learn from this to make me a better person?” Having the right perspective and viewing trials as a necessary part of life will help us to overcome and come out on top.

Recollection

Trials are never new to us. The specific trial may be new, but trials themselves are not new. It can be helpful at times to think about all we’ve been able to overcome thus far in life. Remembering that we’ve made it through difficult times in the past will help us realize we do have the strength to proceed and carry on. Having faith in ourselves and recalling our success will better allow us to deal with present hardships.

Resolve

Determining in our mind before a difficulty ever hits that we will succeed no matter what, empowers us to more fully embrace and overcome hardships. When we have the resolve to come out victorious regardless of the troubles we face, it makes them a bit easier to endure. Please do not misunderstand though. Resolve does not mean that we won’t get discouraged, disappointed, or upset. What it does mean is that we will never give up. And determining we will never give up now before the trial comes prepares us for success. It is impossible for challenges to overtake us when we resolve to never give up.

Difficulties happen to each one of us. It simply is a fact of life and makes life extremely challenging. In fact our trials can either motivate us or crush us. Through reflection, perspective, recollection and resolve, we can conquer anything that comes our way. Learning to deal with difficulty and truly seeing it as an opportunity will help us to be successful in life.

Fighting Fatigue

2011-08-18T04:21:00.000-07:00

One of the most common threats to our ability to reach our potential is fatigue. Exhaustion is part of life but did you know that much of our tiredness is brought on by ourselves? Most of us believe that we our tired because we haven’t gotten enough sleep, or that we’ve worked too long or hard. The truth is however that much of our fatigue today is not caused by over-exertion or lack of sleep, but rather by stress.

Stress leads to exhaustion and fatigue, and fatigue can make life miserable. When we worry or are frustrated, our body wastes energy—energy that could be used toward better causes. If we are able to eliminate or minimize fatigue, we will be much more likely to perform at our highest level, allowing us to be more successful in life. Below are a few simple tips on how to eliminate fatigue.

#1 Mind our Thoughts

One of the best ways to fight against fatigue is to control our thoughts. Thoughts of worry, frustration, anger, or hopelessness cause us to stress and can ware us out! If we can learn to fill our minds with positive thoughts of courage, peace, strength, and hope, our energy levels will naturally increase.

#2 Eat Right/Exercise

Eating right by participating in three balanced meals a day will go a long way in reducing stress. Many of us snack on unhealthy foods all day which reduces our energy levels. But if we try to eat balanced, regular meals our fatigue will diminish. Water is also an important element needed to boost energy. Likewise, exercise helps us reduce stress and fatigue as it can increase our energy levels and confidence. If we are unable to dedicate an hour a day to exercise, even simply marching in place or jumping up and down for a few minutes throughout the day will boost energy and increase oxygen to our brain.

#3 Change Scenery

Sometimes fatigue sets in when we are simply caught up in the mundane tasks of life or the “daily grind.” When we’ve spent several hours on a particular project, or find ourselves following the same routine day after day, we need to change it up. Whether it’s going outside to get a fresh breath of air, or enjoying a conversation with a longtime friend, taking a break and changing things up a bit will help us lift our excitement levels and slow down fatigue. Recognizing that we are feeling tired is a good clue that we need a quick change of pace; even it is just for a few minutes.

#4 Count our Blessings/Forget our Troubles

Similar to #1, if we can focus on appreciation and turn our attention away from our troubles we will greatly enhance our energy level. When we focus on the good in life, we naturally have a greater desire to work hard and put forth our best effort. Being grateful boosts energy and enthusiasm while worrying about all of our troubles causes stress and fatigue. Thus showing gratitude and being thankful will help us to reach our potential.

#5 Enjoy it

Finding a way to do something we enjoy every day can minimize fatigue. Hopefully each of us can find joy in our work but if we can’t, we need to dedicate some time each day to doing something fun. Again, this does not have to mean several hours but simply even fifteen minutes of “fun” can reduce our stress and fatigue.

Learning to eliminate and effectively handle fatigue is important part of our ability to be successful in life. Through controlling our thoughts, exercise and eating right, changing our scenery, being grateful, and enjoying life we can gain an edge by minimizing fatigue. When we learn to effectively deal with fatigue and limit it, we will more fully be able to reach our potential.

Pumping Water

2011-08-11T04:43:00.000-07:00

“Hard work is not always fun, but it’s the price you must pay to be more successful.”
Rick Pitino

There once was a young girl who lived on a farm with her family and her chore each day was to milk the two cows on the farm. In order to do so, she had always been instructed by her good father to first pump water in to a basin for the cows to drink as she milked them. Though she loved drinking the creamy milk the cows produced, she absolutely hated pumping water!!

One day she protested to her father stating she didn’t understand why she had to pump water for the cows before milking them. Her father explained how in order to get the milk, she had to pump the water, otherwise the cows could become dehydrated and would stop producing milk. The father also explained how the water calmed the cows and helped them to be still so that she could more easily milk them. Though she did not like the idea, the young girl continued to pump the water before milking the cows.

Much like the young farm girl, we frequently in life want to get the milk without pumping the water. Somehow we believe that milk should flow to use with little effort. However I have learned in life that you have to pump the water to get the milk. The “pumping” or the preparation and hard work we put in to something produces the “milk” or results we desire. Without our pumping efforts, the milk will never come or will dry up quickly.

Sometimes milk may come without pumping water however when this happens, it is usually not as much as we’d like, or as creamy and sweet. I’ve learned that the best milk comes only after vigorously and consistently pumping the water.

In addition, though hard, annoying, and difficult at times, pumping water can and will bring great satisfaction in life when we have the right attitude. The ability to work is a blessing! Many people are not fortunate enough to have the ability or opportunity to work. Likewise, receiving milk without first working for it automatically diminishes its value—for those things we work most diligently for, are the things most dear to us.

Thus, much like the farm girl, we must pump the water to get the milk. When we do, we can be assured the milk will be so much more rewarding and satisfying.

All Things Become Possible

2011-08-04T04:07:00.000-07:00

“You are the only problem you will ever have and you are the only solution.”
Bob Proctor

Recently I’ve been a part of a new project at work and I am always amazed by how we all almost subconsciously limit ourselves. Like always, our goal for the project is to make it the best we possibly can however there are many obstacles and challenges that stand in our way. Because of this, it becomes so easy for us to assume we can’t accomplish our objectives. And the interesting thing I’ve observed is that each member of the team seems to have different reasons why our goal for this project cannot be done. The truth is, we all have make-believe beliefs that impact our ability to see clearly, that give us excuses why things cannot be done, and that shape our vision and attitudes.

In life, for some reason, we seem conditioned to limit ourselves and to self-create roadblocks. We seem to compulsively believe we cannot. Instead of faith there is doubt, instead of action there is fear, and instead of passion there is reservation. The truth is however that so much is possible.

One major reason why this happens is because we betray ourselves. This happens when we fail to see that we are really the problem. Instead we blame others, make excuses, and look for the easy way out. We believe our perception is reality when in actuality we are shaped by our experiences and beliefs. And too often these experiences and beliefs create boundaries that do not exist.

So, in my project at work, each of us sees different reasons why our goal for the project cannot be done yet stepping back and viewing it from the outside I realize each of the obstacles can be overcome. So, how are limiting ourselves in our lives? What barriers have we created that simply do not exist? As we begin to tear down these beliefs, focus on our objectives, and push through our challenges, all things become possible.

Bee Vision

2011-07-28T04:41:00.000-07:00

A couple months ago I read an article in an alumni magazine about a study on bees. It was discovered that a bee’s eyes were in the exact same shape of the honeycomb it produces. The author of the article pointed out that vision has a profound impact on actions.

With this in mind, what is our vision in life? What do we hope to accomplish, what do we want to do? Is our vision clear or murky? Do we believe we can do something great? Do we have the discipline to be truly committed to it? I’ve found in business and in life that those who have a clear vision are successful.

A vision is often a long-term goal of what we hope to become or accomplish. It is something that in the present seems a bit far-fetched or foolish but over time (maybe 10 years or maybe 50 years) with the right actions, can be achieved. It is the future we hope to create. And in my mind, anything is possible!

Like the bee, our vision will guide our actions. It will help direct us and lead us. A good vision will also inspire and motivate us. Our vision will shape us and make us become the type of people we want to become.

If we are committed to a vision in life, much like the bee, it will define our actions. Likewise, much like the bee and honeycomb, we must have a clear vision and when we do we can make it reality!

The Easy Life

2011-07-21T04:19:00.000-07:00

Recently I heard a speaker mention that many of us have trouble dealing with the curse of an easy life. As I’ve contemplated on this concept I’ve determined that one of the top reasons why some people do not reach their full potential in life is because we have to deal with this curse, the curse of an easy life. That’s right, having an easy life can be a serious curse. In comparison to others, most of us are blessed and don’t want for basic necessities such as food to eat, clean water to drink, a place to sleep, or clothes to wear. When our basic necessities are so easily met and are far surpassed our drive to be our best dwindles.

An easy life can do a lot to impede us from reaching our full potential. Many of us do not fully push ourselves or extend ourselves because we are comfortable or perhaps don’t see the point. We have “enough” so we figure why bother? However, failing to stretch ourselves and reach our greatest potential does result in unnecessary hardships and stress as well as a lack of fulfillment, enjoyment, and satisfaction we could enjoy in this life. Settling, rather than achieving, limits our capability to be happy.

The easy life causes us to be lazy. Rather than working hard to better our situation, develop and learn new talents, and achieve goals, we oftentimes sit around and complain that life is hard and not fair. Hard work is always a necessary stepping stone to success and satisfaction.

A feeling of entitlement often comes into our hearts as a result of an easy life. We start to believe that people, the government, our family, our employer, or someone owes us something. We blame our problems on others and don’t take full ownership for our results. These feelings of entitlement often produce other negative feelings such as feeling disrespected, unappreciated, and used. The truth is, no one owes us anything and it is up to us to achieve whatever it is we hope to accomplish.

Finally, the curse of an easy life often destroys our creativity and resourcefulness. It is much harder to be motivated to be creative or resourceful or hardworking when things are pretty easy. Thus, our desire and ability to push and extend ourselves is diminished.

Therefore, we must find ways to overcome the curse of an easy life, to produce in ourselves a sense of discomfort and dissatisfaction that will create a sense of urgency that will inspire us to be more creative, more resourceful, more willing to sacrifice the present for the future. When we learn to do this, our ability to be successful and happy in life will be greatly enhanced and we will learn to live to our full potential.

Forging Lifes Chains

2011-07-14T04:15:00.000-07:00

“We forge the chains we wear in life.”
Charles Dickens

I subscribe to a weekly email called the “Carnegie Success Connection Tip of the Week” and below is one I thoroughly enjoyed and felt I must share.

Embrace things in your life that drive you to achieve, and start letting go of those things that do not. It is difficult to distinguish the category in which any of your activities belong, but paying attention to your choices and their consequences will sponsor the awareness you'll need to make better life choices in the future. Although things that bring us happiness outside of work can be our greatest inspiration for professional success, often they are so simple, we cast them aside as inconsequential. Do not do this. Remember the small things that make you happy, and use them to battle things that loom much larger and stress you out. Consider these suggestions:
• Fill your mind with thoughts of peace, courage, hope, and health
• Never try to get even with your enemies
• Expect ingratitude
• Count your blessings, not your troubles
• Try not to imitate others
• Create happiness for others

This short “Carnegie Tip of the Week” is full of wonderful truths and wisdom that can bless our lives and help us be successful. First, our choices are so critical. We must pay attention to the consequences our choices bring and choose to do those things that bring us happiness. Second, small things matter. Even the little choices will positively or negatively impact our lives. Third, remember the victories, successes, and joys in life to get us through tough times. Focusing on the good rather than the bad will help us achieve. Lastly, the final thought of turning our focus outside of ourselves and seeking for opportunities to create happiness for others will greatly improve our satisfaction and success in life. I’m grateful for friendly reminders such as this insightful email provided to me the other day. Following its wisdom will lead us to success.