tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-59887302026-02-22T23:07:26.921-05:00Hating all your favorite stuff in long form essays since 2004. Follow @ThadOchocinco on Twitter.Thad Ochocincohttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02733994739505530700noreply@blogger.comBlogger405125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5988730.post-32796223567172305172023-07-24T17:27:00.000-04:002026-02-22T22:16:43.276-05:00

 I haven’t seen Barbie yet, but I have listened to a bunch of dumb motherfuckers tell everybody what men are supposed to do all my life. And just so we’re clear, y’all are the problem.  The Barbie movie isn’t some Zionist plot to destroy manhood, because the truth is, manhood, as defined by the low IQ set, needs to be destroyed. If you listen to them, around every corner, someone’s

Thad Ochocincohttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02733994739505530700noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5988730.post-72084094355580533942021-06-08T10:51:00.000-04:002026-02-22T23:07:26.921-05:00

I get it when people apologize for things they said when they were teenagers. I don't necessarily agree, because if you think back to when you were a teenager, there's probably no end to the regrettable positions you took.  Taking regrettable positions is part of that idealistic and hormone-driven period of our lives, because we don't know shit, but because we're exposed to a larger

Thad Ochocincohttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02733994739505530700noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5988730.post-13655374247558533822021-01-08T22:34:00.000-05:002021-01-08T22:34:56.746-05:00

 Written Oct. 10, 2020 Maybe it’s because I’m old and bitter, but I find myself agreeing with a lot of what Alan Moore has to say this time. Maybe “agree” is too strong a word. But I find myself understanding where he’s coming from when it comes to superhero comics. I guess I’m finally in a place where I can receive what he’s saying without getting defensive. Because defensiveness

Thad Ochocincohttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02733994739505530700noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5988730.post-59273649211406987232021-01-08T22:28:00.000-05:002021-01-08T22:28:25.216-05:00

Written July 31, 2020 I'm not really one for violence, but that doesn't mean I can't appreciate when someone needs to get socked in the mouth. And I generally believe that society has lost something when such self-correcting mechanisms have been removed from the marketplace. I believe in the notion of free speech. I think that you should be able to say what you want without the looming

Thad Ochocincohttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02733994739505530700noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5988730.post-12370096690282580812017-09-04T01:22:00.000-04:002020-05-19T15:15:13.939-04:00

People still seem to be really invested in the idea that Conor McGregor get credit for standing in the ring with one of the greatest boxers of all time, but that's kind of stupid, considering these people aren't big on participation trophies the other 99% of the time.  CM Punk took up the challenge of stepping into the Octagon and they've been laughing at him ever since.  So I'm not

Thad Ochocincohttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02733994739505530700noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5988730.post-47611525711413350272017-05-20T10:51:00.001-04:002020-05-19T15:15:14.151-04:00

Nintendo, for all of it's greatness, stays shooting itself in the foot.  Yeah, they look like they're riding high with the early Switch sales, they keep a few billion in the bank as a general rule, and they always make some of the best games on the market.  They have brand loyalty unlike anything else in the video game industry.  But that's kind of the problem.  Because

Thad Ochocincohttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02733994739505530700noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5988730.post-69723479055479997442017-05-20T10:22:00.001-04:002020-05-19T15:15:14.333-04:00

Like most right thinking people, I decided months ago that I wasn't gonna watch that Charles Barkley race show. If I wanted a sports figure to upset me, I could just think back to the Super Bowl and feel my chest burn. I don't need to watch Charles Barkley stumble his way through some shit that actually matters. But I watched a few commercials and changed my mind.  Then I forgot,

Thad Ochocincohttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02733994739505530700noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5988730.post-86209188503243980572015-12-19T14:12:00.000-05:002020-05-19T15:15:14.458-04:00

Straight off the top:  Star Wars does not feel right without the 20th Century Fox fanfare at the top.  I wish Disney could buy them just for the purpose of making Star Wars feel whole again. Back in 2007, I tore apart Superman Returns, partially for holding the balls of Richard Donner's Superman movies as if it's trying to keep them warm and shielded, like Superman does for Metropolis

Thad Ochocincohttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02733994739505530700noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5988730.post-63576121182012954192015-12-14T13:35:00.001-05:002020-05-19T15:15:14.279-04:00

I don't think there's a person out there that likes off-screen deaths in movies. Not the kind where they're killed off-screen, but then, you learn later on in the movie what happened.  I mean the kind where you spend two or three hours (or more) investing emotionally in these characters, then when the new one comes out, you find out that they died, and no one cares.  That shit sucks.

Thad Ochocincohttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02733994739505530700noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5988730.post-75714811599977635512015-10-30T21:54:00.000-04:002020-05-19T15:15:14.380-04:00

I'm confused by these police out here. On the one hand, the police are supposed to be brave souls, the thin blue line that stands between decent society and chaos, the protectors of the vulnerable.  When everyone is running away from danger, they run towards it.  On the other hand, police are actually delicate flowers that need our love and support to adequately do their jobs.  

Thad Ochocincohttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02733994739505530700noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5988730.post-47898337366471100162015-07-24T12:15:00.003-04:002020-05-19T15:15:14.163-04:00

Hulk Hogan is one of the most well known people in the world. He's also, apparently, a racist, and WWE has disassociated itself from him. They have to do it, because they don't want anyone looking their way for more racism. And we all know if people start looking there, THEY WILL FIND IT. Hulk Hogan worked for WWE for more than 20 years, and has been closely tied to the company at the highest

Thad Ochocincohttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02733994739505530700noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5988730.post-37630535918450317832015-04-20T14:26:00.000-04:002020-05-19T15:15:14.089-04:00

Heads up: Here be spoilers. Bioshock: Infinite has a storyline filled some some of the most disgusting racists of all time.  It's a world where a bunch of racist elites leave mainland America to start their own floating colony called Columbia.  In the early 1900s.  It really is the kind of shit we all expect the rich to do, anyway, except in 2015, they'll call it "Elysium." &

Thad Ochocincohttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02733994739505530700noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5988730.post-75660300189229660132015-04-20T13:46:00.001-04:002020-05-19T15:15:14.374-04:00

Apparently, you have to have qualifications before you can criticize movie trailers now.  You can't just chalk it up to taste anymore.  You have to prove your impartiality before you can speak on movies now.  I don't know where this shit started, but it really needs to stop.  The Batman v. Superman trailer was leaked over the weekend, and naturally, some folks didn't like it,

Thad Ochocincohttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02733994739505530700noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5988730.post-58600704920121240542015-02-02T23:43:00.000-05:002020-05-19T15:15:14.226-04:00

Last week, Bryan Singer announced the recasting of Cyclops, Jean Grey, and Storm for X-Men: Apocalypse, and nobody really seemed to care, because who the fuck are these people?  They're like the cast of the new Fantastic Four flick, except for Michael B. Jordan. In fact, they're so anonymous that they might be the same people.   The Storm casting did get some buzz from Storm fans,

Thad Ochocincohttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02733994739505530700noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5988730.post-1604517930025526172015-01-26T18:39:00.001-05:002020-05-19T15:15:13.969-04:00

Please don't misunderstand, WWE.  People aren't canceling their WWE subscriptions because Roman Reigns won the Royal Rumble.  They're not canceling because Daniel Bryan lost, either.  That would be pretty stupid.  People are canceling their subscriptions because they're tired of your shit. Your show is trash, WWE.  Raw is trash.  Smackdown is trash.  NXT is

Thad Ochocincohttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02733994739505530700noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5988730.post-85000931253752079032015-01-24T15:05:00.001-05:002020-05-19T15:15:14.445-04:00

I get that some folks like college sports more because of this myth that college students play harder.  I don't know where it came from, but it had to have been started by someone who doesn't understand football. It's a really stupid argument that NFL players aren't playing hard all the time, because you will be killed if you play football at half-speed while everyone else isn't.  

Thad Ochocincohttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02733994739505530700noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5988730.post-41655984338198409422014-12-07T22:44:00.002-05:002020-05-19T15:15:14.106-04:00

Seems like everyone has had a few choice words for CM Punk this year, whether it was because he left, how he left, or because he explained his reasons for leaving. Everyone seems to think he's a bitch for walking out on Vince McMahon, like doing the right thing matters in that situation.  In 2011, he was cool for saying everything we had been saying about the company, but now, he's whining.

Thad Ochocincohttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02733994739505530700noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5988730.post-19576504705024319992014-11-08T11:22:00.001-05:002020-05-19T15:15:13.982-04:00

I swear, y'all get so touchy about the wrong shit. There's a story going around that Dion Waiters, shooting guard for the Cleveland Cavaliers, declared that he isn't standing for the National Anthem anymore, because of his religious beliefs.  He's a Muslim, and as we all know, Muslims hate America.  Well, we would all know that if we all did the right thing and watched Fox News. &nbsp

Thad Ochocincohttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02733994739505530700noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5988730.post-15939009573033970682014-07-24T14:06:00.000-04:002020-05-19T15:15:13.963-04:00

It took a lot of effort to write this and not make it about trashing feminists.  I just feel like I need to you let you know that up front. I don't need to tell anybody that the Eric Garner murder by the NYPD is all fucked up.  I think we all agree there.  And I'm not telling you that you have to go protest and hit up every rally that breaks out, because let's be totally honest:

Thad Ochocincohttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02733994739505530700noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5988730.post-79818480241155658872014-05-09T23:25:00.001-04:002020-05-19T15:15:14.399-04:00

Rob Van Dam once talked about how all these world class athletes all smoked weed.  Can't find the quote, but he said something to the effect of, "Why is it that all of the finely tuned athletes who know so much about their bodies are choosing to smoke weed?"  Maybe it was Joe Rogan.  Anyway, they're basically saying that if there was something really wrong with it, these people

Thad Ochocincohttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02733994739505530700noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5988730.post-58804284459873981912014-05-07T22:31:00.000-04:002020-05-19T15:15:14.232-04:00

So Mark Jackson got fired from the Warriors yesterday, despite being the best coach they've had since the first time Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles came out.  Remember those days?  You could still buy a black and white TV.  Michael Jackson being white was a new thing.  All the reports are saying that no one liked him and that's why he got fired.  Well, no one except the

Thad Ochocincohttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02733994739505530700noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5988730.post-1530923427604009622014-05-02T19:10:00.000-04:002020-05-19T15:15:13.956-04:00

We've reached that time when all manner of fringe elements have started declaring for the Presidential race.  Most of the people won't make it the distance because they don't have the resources to get onto the ballot (which is why we need electoral reform), or because they started running two years in advance and ran out of money.  And then, there are those who could have all the money

Thad Ochocincohttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02733994739505530700noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5988730.post-70973380111378378232014-04-29T20:21:00.000-04:002020-05-19T15:15:14.361-04:00

So I guess I'm supposed to be happy that Donald Sterling got a lifetime ban from the NBA.  Yeah, that's fantastic, considering that his days on this earth are probably in the single digits, anyway.  It's a lifetime ban for a person without much life left.  And he still owns the team, so all Adam Silver really did was tell him he can't come to the stadium.  When you buy

Thad Ochocincohttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02733994739505530700noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5988730.post-63548896100880084572014-04-04T10:31:00.001-04:002020-05-19T15:15:14.273-04:00

Some people wonder why you wasted all that time being upset about Kim Kardashian on the Vogue cover.  "She's just getting her money and not hurting anyone." Someone probably told you to stop hating, because they have no idea how to form a legitimate argument.  But I understand, Vogue readers.  That's right, Thad Ochocinco, sporadic blogger who knows nothing about anything outside

Thad Ochocincohttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02733994739505530700noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5988730.post-69274445085179792972014-02-13T15:27:00.000-05:002020-05-19T15:15:14.323-04:00

It's pretty common these days to say, "I just don't agree with his lifestyle," as if people are sitting around waiting for your fucking approval.  You usually hear this in conversations about gay people or gay marriage, but I don't see why people even waste time thinking about it.  Gay people haven't gotten the approval of lots of people in human history, and it hasn't curbed the

Thad Ochocincohttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02733994739505530700noreply@blogger.com0