The Stir By CafeMom: Toddler

Farrah Abraham’s Desperate Need for Fame Could Hurt Her Daughter

Thu, 23 May 2013 19:06:00 EDT

Post by Ericka Sóuter

I have to admit, the Teen Mom franchise has always been very hard for me to watch. Parenthood is tough enough when you are a mature adult with a job and a supportive spouse. It pains me to see these young girls go though the emotionally taxing process of raising a child when they haven't really had a chance to grow up themselves. So it's especially heartbreaking to watch Farrah Abraham make choices that won't just hurt her, but also possibly her beautiful baby girl Sophia.

Many of the stars seem desperate to extend their 15-minutes of fame. I can understand why. The show has changed their lives in ways they couldn't have imagined. They became bona fide stars. So with the end near, I expected them do as many public appearances and interviews as possible. But Farrah took this quest to a whole new level when she decided to make a sex tape. She is sticking the story that she had never intended for it to get out, but very few people are buying that. Who pays a porn star to be in a sex tape with you if you never intend for it to see the light of day?

When I heard about it, I immediately thought of her poor daughter. One day, she will know what her mom did and how will this make her feel? For her part, Farrah says she will be open with Sophia once she's a teenager and share her porn past. Who knows how that conversation will turn out. I can't imagine any child being proud of that. But even more worrisome is that Farrah continues to make decisions that don't seem to have her daughter's best interest in mind.

Coming off her sex tape success, she recently inked a deal for a new reality series and has been in New York City this week for meetings and interviews. In the past, she has said that Sophia will be apart of any show that she films. I have to wonder, though, is that really in Sophia's best interest? I know Farrah wants financial security -- that is top of mind for nearly every single mom. But is this the way to go about it? Even during the toddler years kids are very impressionable. What is best for them is stability and love, not a team of cameras following your every move or throngs of paparazzi and fans. That can be an overwhelming experience for a child, especially one who has already been through so much (her father died in a car accident before she was even born).

And the older Sophia gets, the more cognizant she will be of her mother's lifestyle and choices. I cringe to think of the first time some kid on the playground or at recess starts making fun of her because of her mother's porn tape. And as Farrah flits across the country for press tours or trying to get meetings with producers, there is the possibility that Sophia may get lost in the fray. What that child needs more than anything is a normal child with routines she can count on. My hope is that Farrah will one day give her that.

Do you think Farrah's choices will negatively impact her daughter?

Image via MTV

Dad Turns 4-Year-Old Girl Into a Total Geek and Couldn't Be Prouder (VIDEO)

Thu, 23 May 2013 13:24:00 EDT

Post by Julie Ryan Evans

Having a 9-year-old son, I have some knowledge of superheroes, but I'll go ahead and admit that the 4-year-old in this video, Mia Grace, knows more about comic books than me, my son, and most you put together.

Her dad asks her a series of questions, and from the name of Thor's brother to what makes up Captain America's shield, she nails them one after another. At first, it's like, okay, she memorized a few, but as they go on, you realize how deep her knowledge goes. And how much this tickles her father. I have no clue what she's talking about for a good chunk of it, but she's so adorable, it really doesn't matter.

See this video on The Stir by CafeMom.

I love how the dad is so excited and proud of her knowledge. Clearly he's a fan too and has passed his love of comics on to her. I imagine they have spent many hours reading and discussing them. When mom interrupts them at the end and tells dad they're going on four minutes, you can tell he could have gone on all day.

We all have passions and interests that we pass on to our children ... or at least try to do so. Whether it's music, sports, or other hobbies, it's so fun to share a passion with them and watch them embrace something we love. For me, books are a big one. When my son reads a book I devoured as a child and gets as excited as I did, it's incredible. We may not have a cute video recording it, but it's special nonetheless.

What passions do you share with your children?

Image via YouTube

Gorilla Rescues 3-Year-Old Who Fell Into Zoo Exhibit (VIDEO)

Thu, 23 May 2013 13:00:00 EDT

Post by Adriana Velez

Watching a toddler fall into a zoo exhibit has to be one of the scariest things for a parent to experience. We all remember what happened to that toddler who fell into a wild dog exhibit last fall. They're not called wild animals for nothing. But one 3-year-old got lucky. A gorilla rescued a toddler who fell into its exhibit, cradling the boy and protecting it from the other gorillas. It even carried the boy to the door to make it easier for paramedics to take the toddler away.

Some people are calling it a miracle, but is it, really? I think we need to give primates a little credit for being nurturing, even of other species. We are, after all, very closely related. Primates have been known to help hurt and lost animals of other species before.

Still, I think this toddler is lucky this protective gorilla (maybe also a mother?) got to him first. Things could have turned out differently otherwise. I won't even ask how that toddler fell into the enclosure in the first place. Most parents know they need to be careful with their kids, but it just takes a split second of your attention being diverted for something awful to happen. Imagine the horror you would feel, watching your child fall not just from a great height (looks like the fall knocked the kid out), but into a gorilla exhibit!

Thank goodness these were gentle giants and the boy is safe and sound now.

See this video on The Stir by CafeMom.

Are you surprised that a gorilla would be protective of a human child just like a human mother would be?

Police Accuse Dad of Kidnapping His Daughters Because They Don't Look Like Him

Thu, 23 May 2013 10:30:00 EDT

Post by Jacqueline Burt

Can you imagine how it would feel to have complete strangers question whether or not your children were, in fact, your children? I can. In fact, I don't have to imagine what it would feel like, because as the mother of two biracial children, I know. I know how it feels, for example, to have someone I've never met approach me in a grocery store and say of the daughter I gave birth to weeks before: "She's absolutely adorable! Where did you get her?" (Why, just down the street at the Cute Asian Baby Store, of course! They're even having a sale!)

Thankfully, the experiences I've had along these lines have been more annoying than anything else. Nothing like the terrifying episode Virginia parents Joseph and Keana (last names withheld) recently went through.

Joseph, who is white, and Keana, who is African-American, were out running errands one day with their three young daughters -- just your average family outing. Until they got home, that is, to find a police officer waiting for them.

At first the couple was confused. Then the cop explained why he was there: A security guard at Walmart, where they'd just been shopping, called the police to report a possible kidnapping. "I just need to make sure that the children that you have are your own," said the police officer.

Keana says she was "dumbfounded. I sat there for a minute and I thought, 'Did he just ask us if these were our kids knowing what we went through to have our children?'"

When Keana and Joseph called the Walmart demanding an explanation, they were told that a customer alerted the security guard because he was "alarmed" at the sight of Joseph with his daughters (a 4-year-old and 2-year-old twins). The customer "didn't think that they fit," apparently.

Keana wasn't about to let that one slide: "I said, ‘What do you mean by they don't fit?’ And I was trying to get her [the Walmart employee] to say it. And she says, ‘Well, they just don't match up.’”

This whole thing is beyond outrageous, but what's truly sad is that Joseph and Keana say they're "not surprised," and neither am I. Even in this day and age, narrow-mindedness runs rampant; combine that with our society's tendency to judge and condemn, and you have ... a big mess. It's just a shame that innocent families have to deal with it.

Are you surprised that this dad was accused of kidnapping his biracial daughters?

Image via Vox Efx/Flickr

Giveaway: Early Lingo DVD Series

Wed, 22 May 2013 17:00:00 EDT

Post by The Stir Bloggers

As a parent, it's natural to want your child to have the best of the best. The best of the best upbringing, the best of the best friends, and of course -- the best of the best education. That's why we love Early Lingo, an immersion method intended for children as young as 6 months that teaches little ones a foreign language in a fun, creative way.

With all of the many benefits to being bilingual, we're stoked to be giving one lucky Stir reader a six-part Early Lingo DVD series in the language of their choice -- English, French, Spanish, Italian, Mandarin, or German.

To enter to win, simply tell me:

What languages do you speak in your home? Do you think being bilingual is important?

Here are the rules for this giveaway here on The Stir:

The “Giveaway: Early Lingo DVD Series” starts on May 22, 2013 at 5:00 p.m. (ET) and ends at 11:59 p.m. (ET) on June 2, 2013 (the “Sweepstakes Period”).

Enter by replying to this post with an appropriate comment during the Sweepstakes Period. Limit one entry per day during the Sweepstakes Period. One (1) winner will be selected in a random drawing of all eligible entries on or around June 3, 2013 to receive an Early Lingo language six-part series in the language of their choice (total value $99).

*No Purchase Necessary. Open to US residents 18 years and older. Void where prohibited. Click here for the rest of the Official Rules.

2-Year-Old Going Through Puberty Is a Truly Frightening Thing for Her Parents

Tue, 21 May 2013 20:43:08 EDT

Post by Julie Ryan Evans

There are two stages in a child's life that strike fear in parents' hearts like none other -- toddlerhood and puberty. Both happening simultaneously sounds like a nightmare, but it's the heartbreaking reality for one family as their 2-year-old is reportedly going through early puberty.

According to People's Daily Online, a toddler in China, identified only as Dandan, is being treated for what's technically known as "precocious puberty." When she was 8 months old she began developing breasts, and shortly after her first birthday she began menstruating. It's difficult to imagine how baffled and frightened her parents must have been.

Of course, the question is why, and is this something that we're going to be seeing more of? It's reported that the girl had been fed formula exclusively, and with all of the problems China has had with its formula, you have to wonder if that didn't have something to do with it. Also, according to the publication, it may be caused by a cyst on her right ovary. If that's the case, hopefully it can be treated.

While this case is exceptionally young, in recent years we have heard more heartbreaking stories of girls going through puberty at younger and younger ages. Not only is it emotionally challenging but there are plenty of health risks that go along with precocious puberty as well. From an increased risk of breast cancer to a higher risk for things like eating disorders and depression, it's more than just embarrassing or a nuisance.

Two is startlingly young and hopefully an anomaly, but so was 7 or 8 until recent years. Hopefully, we can soon figure what is going on to make this happen -- in this case and in others -- and find ways to prevent it and save our girls from such a frightening fate.

Can you imagine having your toddler go through puberty?

Image via Robert/Flickr

TV Star’s Stance on Extended Breastfeeding May Shock Her Fans (VIDEO)

Tue, 21 May 2013 15:27:00 EDT

Post by Adriana Velez

Another celeb mom is talking about her attachment parenting practices. The Wonder Years star Danica McKellar is talking about extended breastfeeding her son. "I breastfed my son 'til he was 2 and a half years old," she told ABC News. "That was just, like, a few weeks ago that we stopped. Big transition."

But I think what's really interesting is what made her decide to wean at that point. A lot of moms who do extended breastfeeding do baby-led weaning. That means you allow the baby to continue breastfeeding until they just stop on their own. But that's not what Danica did. "I just sensed that it was time that he needed to be a little more independent," she says.

I think most moms who do extended breastfeeding actually do a combination of baby-led and mommy-led weaning. That was definitely the case with me, and I nursed my son until he was almost 3. But you definitely hear a lot more about baby-led, and for some of us, there's pressure to be all baby-led. So it's refreshing to hear someone say that she made the judgment herself -- and that she based that decision on noticing that her child needed to be more independent.

I think Danica putting it that way puts a new spin on attachment parenting. It gets a bad rap for producing needy, dependent kids, even though it can actually do the opposite -- produce secure, independent kids. Danica is pretty clear on the difference between closeness and spoiling:

Cuddling, being close, you know, sleeping in the same bed sometimes, wearing him in a sling, long-term breastfeeding, all have to have this closeness. On the other hand, doing everything your child wants you to do right when they want you to do it is another thing. Spoiling them is completely different.

Exactly! The difference is that you use physical closeness to help your child feel loved and secure. That just feels right for some moms. And hey, if that's not right for you, Danica isn't judging. But she does believe in setting boundaries, too. And that's a smart way to make it all work. Anyway, the reason why she's speaking out is to throw more support behind women who do extended breastfeeding, because it's still definitely not the norm for most families.

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How did you decide when to wean your baby?

Image via GMA

8 Totally Tasteless Toddler T-Shirts

Mon, 20 May 2013 19:39:00 EDT

Post by Adriana Velez

A dad was clothes shopping for his four-year-old daughter when he came across what he at first thought was a perfectly nice t-shirt. But then he saw what it read: "BARELY LEGAL" in pink camouflage lettering -- and "HUSTLER" in there, too, in case you didn't get the point. What the! He posted a photo of the shirt to Reddit, saying, "carried it around for about five minutes before I read the text and threw up in my mouth a little."

Ugh, what was that t-shirt company thinking? And who would buy such a t-shirt for a four-year-old girl? Shudder. But hey, there's more where that came from. The Internet is FULL of bad ideas for toddler t-shirts.

20 Confessions That Show the Dark Side of Motherhood

Mon, 20 May 2013 15:18:00 EDT

Post by Jill Smokler

Last night, as I often do when I should be doing something else, I got sucked into my Scary Mommy Confessional. It's been a while since I've shared confessions, so here are some of my favorite recent ones. Can you relate to any? I certainly can ...

1. My kids are getting on my nerves so badly that I wish I could open my closet and escape to Narnia.

2. Some days, the greatest sign of my love for my family is that I refrain from strangling them.

3. I bought my 9-month-old a pair of yoga pants. Apparently neither one of us plans on ever joining polite society again.

4. I eat ice cream out of coffee mugs so that the kids won't notice and I won't have to share.

5. Saw a loaf of bread sold at nearly $6 today, and I suddenly felt really really inspired to learn how to bake my own bread at home. And then I laughed and laughed and laughed like a crazy woman, right there in the bread aisle.

6. My 1-year-old was licking something sticky off the floor. Instead of stopping her, I let her continue because lunch wasn't quite finished and it was keeping her occupied.

7. Why, yes, I did just cuss at my 6-month-old, but he started it by getting up at 4 a.m. for the morning.

8. My son likes to show his toys to his penis. I think it's his best friend. I found myself thinking this morning, "I wish I had that kind of relationship with my vagina." I think I need a hobby.

9. I think I got carpal tunnel from Candy Crush.

10. I pretend to feel bad when my toddler prefers daddy. But secretly, I'm relieved. I like the break.

11. Currently covered in pee. About to give myself a baby wipe bath. Oh the joys of motherhood.

12. My kids all sleep in their underwear because no pajamas means that much less laundry for me to wash and fold.

13. I knew I needed a break when my 2-year-old son threw an empty 5-gallon water jug at me and I could so easily envision myself picking up the jug and chucking it back at him as hard as I could!

14. Inspector Gadget would be super impressed with how far my boobs stretch. If only I could use them to fight crime.

15. I mentally tell my 13-year-old to go fuck herself at least 20 times a day.

16. To hell with tea or coffee, I can't start the day without my vibrator.

17. I can ruin an entire week of exercising and eating well with one day of PMS and access to chocolate.

18. Nothing makes me happier than a $4 bottle of Pinot Grigio.

19. I sucked breast milk from my own nipple. Just wanted to see what all the fuss was about.

20. The dog pees to mark and claim his territory. I use Cajun spices and hot sauce to mark and claim mine.

Got a confession of your own?

Kids' Backseat Dancing Will Make You Want to Turn Up the Music (VIDEO)

Mon, 20 May 2013 11:23:00 EDT

Post by Julie Ryan Evans

There are few things cuter than watching young children dance, but watching young children car dance is one of them. Sometimes, you're cruising around, listening to tunes, and all of a sudden you catch a sweet glance in the rear-view mirror of them bogeying down right there in the back seat.

Not all of us are able to capture those hilarious moments when they happen, but the parents in the following video did. It's a compilation of some of the cutest, funkiest little car-seat dancing dudes and dudettes you've ever seen. Check them out for an instant smile and boost to your day.

See this video on The Stir by CafeMom.

How seriously cute are they? I love how the music just lights them up. It's hard to pick a favorite, because they're all talented in their own way, but I'm not sure I could ever get enough of that first little dude who is so excited by "Gangnam Style" and his sister's hysterical laugh. The rapper around 0:15 is also just all sorts of awesome. They all are really.

Driving with toddlers in the car isn't always easy, but it's amazing moments like this that make the rest worth it. Now what I really want to see is a video of parents getting down in their seats -- you know you do it too!

Which of these is your favorite? Do your kids car dance?

Image via YouTube

The 5 Worst People to Run Into When With Your Kids

Sun, 19 May 2013 10:00:00 EDT

Post by Michele Zipp

We all have days when being a mom is the most amazing and rewarding experience ever. With cherries on top and dancing bears that fart rainbows scented like cotton candy. Then there are days where we can't wait until it's bedtime so we can have a HUGE GLASS OF WINE. And then another. It's those challenging days that I want to personally pull the fingernails off of certain people because they help take my kids from level 5 annoying to level 11 out of 10.

Go on and say it's my fault because I'm an awful mom. I'm going to sip my wine and blame others. Here are the five worst people to run into when you are with your kids ... particularly on those challenging days.

The balloon man. Kids love balloons. Cranky kids love ballons. Cranky kids get balloons and are not cranky for five minutes and then balloon pops and not cranky kids become the CRANKIEST KIDS EVER. People with bubbles. My kids have a bubble problem. Perhaps it's because I deprive them of bubbles and so when they see bubbles they freak out. Bubbles make them seem like they are on a 387 pound sugar high. Blow bubbles! More bubbles! Give me bubbles! Pop bubbles! More! Again! Let me do it. Spill all over. I want more bubbles! Anyone who uses the word ice cream too freely. Consider this a public service announcement. If you are talking to a child who cannot spell yet, please only spell out the word "ice cream." Never say the word ice cream. Because if those two words are mumbled before dinner everything is ruined. People with dogs. I love dogs. My kids love dogs. This has nothing to do with dogs. I'm not anti-dog. I am anti running into anyone with a dog who either A. has an un-pettable pup that my kids really want to pet but can't and therefore they spend the next 5 hours talking about how they really wanted to pet that mean dog with foam coming out of his mouth or B. never want to leave the area where the sweet dog is. The sick friend who insists on kissing your kids. I'm not scared of germs. I'm fine with being around sick kids. I'm not a lollipop party kind of mom though. And so that also means if you are sick, don't plant a wet one on my kid's face.

Can you relate? Are there any others to add?

Image via gfpeck/Flickr

I Won't Put My Son on a Leash

Fri, 17 May 2013 20:07:00 EDT

Post by Bob Meadows

My son is running. He’s no Usain Bolt, but he’s pretty quick. Rumor has it, he will only get faster. So the question is: Will I use a restraint for him, one of those backpacks shaped like an animal that has a really long tail? The answer: No! I will not put a leash on my son.

His safety is my chief concern, so I don’t care that the harness might embarrass him or make him look like an ancient Mike Myer’s sketch on Saturday Night Live. (And I do allow concessions for children with medical issues that may make a restraint a requirement and for parents who have more than one child to keep an eye on). But if you have only one child, like me, you should be able to keep your little one out of harm’s way when walking down the street.

First step: Put down the cell phone. I see this all the time. Parents walking and celling at the same time. If you are walking with your child, there is nothing more important than your child. Texting while walking is a no-no. Talking on the phone while walking is a no-no. Facebooking while walking is a no-no. Wait until you get to the park or the library or Grandma’s house, some place with four walls, and then you can ignore your real family to play with your fake one.

When my son and I walk down the street, I’m looking at him with brief glances to scan our surroundings. If I need to look somewhere other than at him for an extended time, the first thing I do is hold his hand.

When we walk, I am on the street side, and he can amble without any restraint. If he wants to be on the street side, I am holding his hand (or wrist, when he tries to pull away from me). This isn’t negotiable.

So Daddy’s arm will be the restraint, along with stern looks and sterner warnings. But leashes? No way.

Do/did you use a harness? Why or why not?

Image via Angela Johnson Meadows

'The Baby Bachelor' Is Jimmy Kimmel's Most Adorable Kid Clip Yet (VIDEO)

Fri, 17 May 2013 12:29:00 EDT

Post by Linda Sharps

Some people give Jimmy Kimmel a hard time for routinely asking parents to pull mean pranks on their kids in the name of quality television entertainment. Personally, I can't get enough of those awesomely cruel videos of children weeping over their terrible Christmas presents or reacting to the upsetting news that their parents ate all their Halloween candy, but if you prefer your Kimmel Kid Programming to be a little more on the awwwww side, may I recommend The Baby Bachelor.

In the clip, Kimmel pokes fun at ABC's The Bachelor/The Bachelorette franchise with a little help from his adorable nephew Wesley. Wesley is single, lives with his parents, and he's looking for love ... while perched in a stroller and dressed in a pint-sized tux. This video is so freaking cute you just might forgive Kimmel for his kid-pranking ways (although in true Kimmel form, at least one child does a bang-up job of crying on cue for the camera).

Wesley must choose between a bevy of lovely young -- very young -- ladies, including 35-month-old Jesse, a "stay-at-home daughter" looking for "a sugar daddy." Ashley, the dental hygienist, looks like the winner when Wesley reveals that he'd "like to get the big girl." But surely it must be anybody's game at this point? I mean, Eva the fingerpainter has quite the alluring handshake, going for the surprise left hand approach and all.

Here's the video:

See this video on The Stir by CafeMom.

Poor Stella, the "handful" who appears at 0:45 and can't stop wailing. But how adorable is Wesley for trying to make her feel better?

Seriously, this whole thing is beyond awesome. Part two of The Baby Bachelor is apparently coming next week and I can't wait to see it. Will you please accept Wesley's rose dinosaur?

What did you think of The Baby Bachelor?

Image via YouTube

9 Simple Chores Your Preschooler Could Be Doing Right Now

Thu, 16 May 2013 17:07:00 EDT

Post by Adriana Velez

Got a lazy kid? Of course you don't! Kids are NEVER lazy. Har har. Everyone seems to have a different opinion about how much responsibility kids should have, and at what age. I remember being surprised to learn a friend of mine had already taught her 3-year-old how to make his bed. My next thought was, Why isn't my kid making his own bed?

Because! I hadn't shown him how to, yet. That's why. My 3-year-old was living off the fat of the land, with no responsibilities whatsoever. Well, that put me on notice. There are some household chores a preschooler is capable of taking on. These tasks teach them self-sufficiency and help them feel more a part of their family community. How many chores you assign is up to you and your child, but here's a few you might want to start with.

1. Make your bed. Your child may need help, but 3 or 4 is a good age to start teaching your child to make their own bed. Just don't pressure them to get it done perfectly.

2. Pick up your toys. This important habit should start early -- kids should always pick up any toys they play with as soon as they're done playing with them. You know the song: Clean up, clean up.

3. Clear dishes from the table. Start with just their own dishes, then move on to the family's dishes when they're a little older.

More from The Stir: 7 Things That Set Off Toddler Tantrums -- Who Knew?!

4. Put silverware away from dishwasher. This simple sorting activity is easy enough for more preschoolers. Careful with knives, though.

5. Put dirty clothes in laundry hamper. Another important daily habit.

6. Help load laundry in washer or dryer. Kids love helping in the laundry room, so take advantage of that and let them help move laundry from machine to machine. Always supervise carefully in the laundry room.

7. Wipe up spills. Don't scold! Just hand your child a washcloth whenever they spill and calmly ask them to clean up. This helps them to take personal responsibility for their messes -- and helps teach them to be careful not to spill in the first place.

8. Clean out bathroom sink. When your child is brushing their teeth, make sure they rinse away any toothpaste or left inside the sink.

9. Feed pets. This is another chore kids might need extra help with -- but it's a fun one, I think.

This downloadable chore chart for preschoolers by SimpleMom is a cute way to make chores more fun.

What chores do your children do around the house?

Image via WellspringCS/Flickr

Why Little Girls and Boys Should See Each Other Naked

Thu, 16 May 2013 13:00:00 EDT

Post by Adriana Velez

Quick, when was the last time your kid saw some other kid's privates? A kid of the opposite gender, I mean? When I was growing up, this was sort of a given. I'm the oldest of five children, so I saw all my sibs' diapers getting changed. And I saw my friends' mothers changing their babies' diapers. And I saw diapers getting changed at church. From an early age, I learned that little boys look different -- and it wasn't a big deal at all.

So it's just been weird to grow up and discover some people think children should be shielded from the horrifying knowledge that there are babies out there with DIFFERENT GENITALS! I mean, from there it's just a slippery slope of childhood corruption. Sayonara to your little darlings' shattered innocence. Now she knows there's such a thing as a penis -- OH MY GOD, you didn't tell her that's what it's called, did you?!?

Moms, most of you are totally over this, right? I mean, if you have a few of your own, or if you hang out with friends with kids, it's just unavoidable. Oh sure, you could lead your 3-year-old into a different room when you go to change or bathe her baby brother. But that's not practical. And anyway, what kind of a message is that going to send?

Kids have vivid imaginations. If you make a big deal of getting your older child out of the room every time the baby is nakey, she's going to come up with some sort of explanation. Like, from the waist down, Baby looks like the Kraken. Or he has highly toxic poo. Or you're sneaking him candy.

I think kids should see each other naked at a very young age. It's the best way to teach them about those differences in a healthy, un-sexualized way.

I think it's hard, sometimes, for grownups to see things from a kid's perspective. For a 3-year-old, having different genitals is utterly innocent. It's adults who layer on that sexual meaning. If you let your kids find out about all that while it's still innocent, I think they'll have a much healthier attitude about bodies. We don't have to start shaming our kids at such an early age -- society will do plenty of that when they're older.

Do you let your kids see other kids naked?

Image via tresross/Flickr

Mom's Failure to Call 911 When She Finds Her Toddlers Drowning Is Sad and Confusing

Wed, 15 May 2013 18:19:00 EDT

Post by Jacqueline Burt

As a mom, I can't imagine the horror of finding the limp bodies of your two beautiful babies floating in a swimming pool. Panic? Shock? One would think the first priority of any parent would be to call 911 immediately, which is what makes the reaction of Tassie Anne Behrens of La Mesa, California, so difficult to understand. The 26-year-old mom woke up Monday morning at the home of a friend where she'd been staying for several days and walked outside to find her 2-year-old son Jason Bradford and 16-month-old daughter Harley Bradford in the pool. The children were unresponsive when pulled out of the water, so Behrens and a "man who lived at the house" reportedly put the babies in a black truck "with the intention of taking them to the hospital" -- but they didn't take them to the hospital. Instead, they took the kids to La Mesa fire station. WHAT?!

From there, the children were transported by ambulance to the hospital -- but why the hell didn't their mom go straight there?? Or call 911?!

Harley passed away at 10:27 a.m. Monday morning. Jason followed his little sister at 11:25 p.m. Monday night.

Apparently Behrens told investigators that she "drove the children for help" instead of calling 911 because she didn't want a "friend who lives at the house to get in trouble for not having a gate around his pool." And that's more important than saving her children's lives?! According to the authorities, she initially lied about where the kids were found, claiming it was a pool at Lamplighter Mobile Home Park. What gives??

Later that day, 44-year-old Larry Dangelo, a resident of the La Mesa home, was taken into custody by members of the regional Narcotics Task Force and booked on several charges, including possession of marijuana for sale and running a hash oil extraction lab. (Police don't think Dangelo is the same man who helped drive the kids to the fire station.) So clearly the people at that house had something to hide, and it had nothing to do with a gate around the pool. I also have a feeling there was a lot more to hide than some pot and hash oil. But that still doesn't really explain why a mother would be more concerned with getting her friend in trouble than saving her kids. At least not to me.

Why do you think this mom chose not to call 911?

Image via Beatrice Murch/Flickr

Toxic Chemical Found in Kids' Clothes and Pajamas -- Yikes!

Wed, 15 May 2013 12:15:00 EDT

Post by Adriana Velez

Does your child's skin seem irritated? There could be truly freaky reason for that. A news station investigation uncovered formaldehyde in baby clothing. And now a senator is stepping in to ask the government to look into setting standards for chemicals in children's clothes.

Minneapolis Care 11 sent baby clothes to a lab for testing after a mother wrote in, complaining that her daughter's legs had broken out into a rash after wearing a new pair of leggings (she hadn't washed the leggings first). They sent different brands, and the results were disturbing.

Out of 18 articles of clothing, two pairs of leggings had levels of formaldehyde higher than the apparel industry's standards. That would be 20 parts per million. I kind of think maybe the standard should be something like ZERO levels of formaldehyde, but that's just me.

Trace amounts of formaldehyde were found in four other articles of clothing. Again -- really wish the chemical wasn't there at all.

I suppose we could be grateful that out of 18 articles of clothing, 12 were formaldehyde-free. Juice and crackers for everyone! Let's throw a happy baby clothes party! But that's not good enough for me.

Unlike other countries, the U.S. doesn't have standards for how much formaldehyde goes into children's clothing. BUT MAYBE WE SHOULD. It's usually used to keep clothing wrinkle-free, obviously a priority with BABY CLOTHING -- WTF?!? Who cares about wrinkles in their baby leggings? Unless companies are just buying pre-treated textiles and using the stuff to make clothes in all sizes. But still, even though I think it's worse to have chemicals in baby clothes, I don't want chemicals in my clothes, either.

And washing your clothes first (always a good idea anyway) won't break down all that formaldehyde completely. On the other hand, not everyone is allergic to the stuff. But it's also been linked to cancer, so ... ugh.

Anyway, Senator Amy Khlobuchar is going to try and get some kind of regulation for chemicals in kids' clothes. I wish her luck -- but I think what's really going to help is if more and more parents demand chem-free clothes for their babies.

But man, this makes you want to buy baby clothes that are specifically labeled as chemical-free, doesn't it?

Are you worried about chemicals in your kids' clothing?

Image via Kare11.com

7 Free Things People Give My Kids That I HATE (PHOTOS)

Tue, 14 May 2013 23:30:00 EDT

Post by Julie Ryan Evans

Does it seem like everywhere you go these days, people want to give your kids something? From the bank to the grocery store, it seems someone is handing my kids something every time I turn around.

Oh, I know it's all well-intended, and much better than them being rude to my kids or even banning them altogether, it's just that ... I HATE all of this crap. It winds up left in my minivan, washed through my washer, or piled up somewhere in their bedrooms long after those first fleeting seconds of joy it brought.

I don't mean to be ungrateful. And yes, I could just decline their kindness, but that's easier said than done when the offer is made right in front of a toddler. Here are seven of the frequent freebies we get and why they irritate me so.

What free things do people give your kids?

Image via Boudewijin Berends/Flickr

4-Year-Old Belts Out Bruno Mars' 'When I Was Your Man' (VIDEO)

Tue, 14 May 2013 09:00:00 EDT

Post by Michele Zipp

I love me some Bruno Mars. I know every word to "When I Was Your Man." Emo song about love lost. "I should have bought you flowers and held your hand. Should have gave you all my hours when I had the chance. Take you to every party 'cause all you wanted to do was dance. Now my baby is dancing, but she's dancing with another man." Oh, Bruno. You really know how to belt it out. And so does 4-year-old Kai Langer from Woodland, Texas.

Little Kai was on The Ellen DeGeneres Show last week and did his own rendition of Mars' song. It was his second visit to the show -- the first time he covered "Grenade." Watch Kai in a signature Bruno Mars fedora hat belt out "When I Was Your Man." Better prepare yourself though -- you might smile so hard, you'll hurt your face.

See this video on The Stir by CafeMom.

"I should have bought you fwowers ..."! Don't you just love the way little Kai sings? The hand expressions! The way his cute little face scrunches up! THAT FEDORA!! And then when he holds Ellen's hand to really emote the lyrics -- too much cute. I just love when kids know all the words to a song. My son knows most of the words to The Black Keys' El Camino album. I'm a proud mama.

Kai is a huge fan of Bruno's and even met him once on a plane. He told Ellen, "I was taking a nap and my mommy woke me up because she saw Bruno Mars -- she was walking to the bathroom. And Bruno said 'Hit it Kai.'" And the tot sang for his idol! Now if only I saw Dan Auerbach somewhere so my son could sing for him.

Great video, isn't it? Your face hurts from smiling, doesn't it? Best thing you've watched all day, right?

Parents Freak Out When Girls in Bikinis Sunbathe Next to Their Kids at Park

Mon, 13 May 2013 15:08:00 EDT

Post by Nicole Fabian-Weber

As parents, we sometimes forget that the world doesn't revolve around us. A dump truck bounds down the street, waking our sleeping baby, and we think: "Seriously?! Who gets trash in the middle of the day?!" Or a motorcycle zooms past us as we walk with our child, scaring the bejeezus out of them and making them cry. "Who could be so mean?!" we mutter. But the fact is, the world doesn't revolve around us. Never did, and never will.

A group of parents are currently up in arms because young women have decided to enjoy the warm weather at a local playground -- by sunbathing in their bikinis. Yes, there are scantily-clad college-aged girls at a park with kids -- and mamas no like.

Last week, tanners were kicked out of the park in the Stuy Town part of NYC after a soccer league complained; and The Stuyvesant Town Report blog is currently rife with complaints from parents. "This playground should NOT be used for sunbathing," the blog's anonymous author stated. "We’ve heard that complaints were made, and now it’s time for management to ... show some balls." And on the flip side, the bronzed co-eds, naturally, think the outrage is ridiculous. One tanner pointed out: "I pay just as much rent as they do. Just because I don’t have a child doesn’t mean I shouldn’t be able to be here"; while another said: "We pay outrageous money to live here. Let us sunbathe for a few hours."

Fact is, a park is a public place. And let me tell you, when you live in NYC, and it's nice out, you do what you can to be outside. If that means getting some sun at a park kids play at, so be it. It isn't like the girls are sunbathing in the nude. They're in their swimsuits. Would it be a little jarring to see a bikini-clad girl at the park you usually take your kid? I suppose. But causing a stink over it is absolutely ridiculous.

I really hope that the moms who are upset over the sunbathing women aren't the ones who think it's insane for anyone to get pissed that they would breastfeed sans nursing cover in public. Why should they be able to show their breasts, and these women not be able to show (part of) theirs? They're boobs! Everyone needs to get over it! I, personally, think moms should be able to whip out their boobs anywhere they damn please. But I also think girls and guys should be able to wear swimsuits and catch a few rays on a nice day.

Parents, we have to realize that the world doesn't stop and roll out the red carpet for us anywhere we go. Yes, our kids are the most important things in the world to us, and we're more cognizant of other parents, but there are other people on this earth, and sometimes, they just want a little sunshine, too. Deal with it.

Would you be mad if you saw a sunbather at your kid's park?

Image via Hamner_Fotos/Flickr

4-Year-Old Elected Mayor of Minnesota Town -- Ice Cream for Everyone! (VIDEO)

Mon, 13 May 2013 11:45:00 EDT

Post by Julie Ryan Evans

Robert Tufts is pretty much your average 4-year-old. Only in addition to coloring, dancing, and playing, he's also in charge of running Dorset, Minnesota, since being named its mayor. For real.

The town -- population 22 -- actually "elects" its mayor via a drawing at the "Taste of Dorset" festival each August. For a dollar anyone can enter the race, and last year Tufts was the winner. Since taking office, Mayor Bobbie has been wowing the community with his composure and charm.

There's no first lady ... yet. But Mayor Bobbie does have a girlfriend named Sophia. He likes her, and he likes to fish a lot. Watch this great interview in which he talks about both.

Adorable, right? While it doesn't seem that he has any real legislative powers, wouldn't it be interesting if he did? Can you imagine what would happen if a toddler was really running the town? Since I have a 4-year-old, I have a feeling it would look something like this:

Bedtimes would officially be banished.
Tricycles lanes would be added to city streets
Parking meters would dispense candy.
Christmas would come every day.
Zoning disputes would be settled with a rousing game of Red Rover.
A city ordinance would ban adults from saying "no".
Ribbon cutting ceremonies would turn into limbo contests.
The street lights would be twinkly.
City council meetings would take place in a bounce house.
Free ice cream for everyone would be in the budget.
Lawbreakers would be sent to time-out.
The city's water would be replaced with chocolate milk.

Sounds pretty good, no?

What kind of rules would your 4-year-old make if he or she was running a town?

Image via WCCO

10 Mother's Day Quotes From Some of Our Favorite Moms

Sun, 12 May 2013 08:00:00 EDT

Post by Jeanne Sager

It isn't always easy being a mother, is it? That's what Mother's Day is all about, taking one day and telling the 85.4 million of us that the nation has got our back. Heck, mothers have risen to some pretty high profile positions in this nation. Today quotes from some of the most high powered and famous moms in America are a good reminder that we're not just doing this alone.

Out there our voices are loud and proud and being heard by somebody -- if not by our kids. From one-time Secretary of State Hillary Clinton to First Lady Michelle Obama, there are mothers who are putting a maternal spin on making a difference.

Today we celebrate mothers of all kinds by looking at what these moms have to say about what it is we do day in and day out.

More From The Stir: 6 Mother's Day Quotes Straight From the Movies

Feel free to pin them to Pinterest or share them on Facebook ... and don't forget to give Mom a big hug!

Which quote is your favorite?

Image by Jeanne Sager

Dividing Childcare Evenly: How My Wife and I Manage It

Sat, 11 May 2013 20:39:00 EDT

Post by Bob Meadows

It’s 3 a.m. My son’s arms are wrapped around my neck. He's sick and I’m covered in a fine mist of everything he’s expelling from his nose and mouth. One word comes to mind: Lucky.

A lot of dads would disagree. They push babies and their care off on mom. But when it comes to rearing our son, my wife and I divide childcare right down the middle. He’s adopted, so I could never use breastfeeding as an excuse to avoid middle-of-the-night meals. In truth, I didn’t want to. I waited my whole life for him. Why miss a minute?

My son joined us when he was 4 days old. In our first few weeks with him, my wife and I jumped up together whenever he made a sound. Since I had changed one diaper in my life, and she hadn’t changed any since her teens, we tag-teamed that too, each of us holding a leg!

But after a month or so, we began alternating the wail watch, and from there evolved our routine. One of us dresses him for bed and puts him down at 7 p.m., and is on call until midnight. The other person takes over from midnight through the 7 a.m. morning ritual. You dress him, hand him his first bottle and make his breakfast an hour later. For the rest of the day, we share diapering, cleaning and feeding.

Not every task is evenly split, and it's probably not surprising that I do more of the playing with while my wife does almost all of the clothes and toy shopping. It works for us.

The overnight shift, naturally, can still be wearying even after he began sleeping through the night at four months. But it’s also a blessing. I sometimes hope our son will awaken just so I can be with him. I feel a connection with him then that is unlike the daylight hours. In the groggy silent night, when he is curled on my lap, another word comes to mind, the one he exclaims whenever I enter the room. Oh yes, Daddy.

Does your childcare division work for you?

Image via Angela Johnson Meadows

Dad Confession: My Son Is Afraid of His Grandfather!

Fri, 10 May 2013 16:01:00 EDT

Post by Bob Meadows

Let’s get this out of the way: My dad is a great guy. He doesn’t meet strangers. He has one of those laughs you can hear even in a roomful of laughing people.

Naturally, my 15-month-old son is terrified of him. On our last trip to visit my parents--unlike all the other times they'd met--my now15-month-old son shrieked every time Granddad drew near.

Admittedly, my little guy looked warily at everyone. He has only met them a few times in person. But he saved his loudest yelps for the 6’2” mustachioed man who I look a lot alike. Dad took it in stride, but I was at a loss. For the briefest moment I considered covering my father in my son's favorite food (strawberries) to see if that would break the ice.

But I’ve studied up and discovered that I’m not alone. Here are some things I’m going to try:

Video chat: My son looks at pictures of his faraway family all the time. But hopefully seeing and hearing Granddad regularly will help break the ice. Ease in, repeat: I’ll hug my father first, to show my son that he’s a friend. Then hand one of his favorite toys to Granddad as a lure. I’ll repeat this step as needed until my son is comfortable. Be prepared: My son smiles at strangers on the subway, so it never occurred to me he would have trouble warming up to my family. But next time, I’ll know better. Also, I’ll stop telling people that he smiles at strangers on the subway. Have hugs ready: When he’s scared, I’m his oasis. Nothing solves a problem like Daddy Hugs, right? And yes, we can leave the party for a while so you (and I!) can regroup. Chill: My son is 15 months old. It’s natural for toddlers to be leery, especially of those with deep, booming voices. This too shall pass.

Hopefully the next time we see my folks, my little guy will warm up to Granddad’s embrace. But I'll have some strawberries with me. Just in case.

What relative did your little one fear? How did you help him or her overcome it?

7 Things It's Okay to Steal From Your Kids (PHOTOS)

Thu, 09 May 2013 20:10:06 EDT

Post by Julie Ryan Evans

In a shocking new study, a dirty little secret of many parents is revealed -- they're thieves. According to CouponCodes4u, almost half of parents say they've taken money from their children's savings accounts. Even worse -- 51 percent say they don't feel guilty about it.

Now, I've been known to take a few dollars from my kids' piggy banks here and there in a crisis (hello, Tooth Fairy nights!), as I never have cash on hand, but I always pay them back ... at least when I remember. But going into an actual savings account and withdrawing their money to pay my bills or something, that I would never do.

There are, however, plenty of other things I do shamelessly steal from kids and make no apologies for. Here are seven of them.

What things do you steal from your kids?

Image via StockMonkeys.com/Flickr