Career Chick Chat

How often do you need to socialize with work colleagues?

2013-02-14T10:56:00.000+11:00

How often with colleagues?

By Karen Adamedes

According to a recent poll on the Huffington Post article "Women and Alcohol: Does Mixing Drinking With Work Help or Hinder Your Career" over 80% of us think that drinking with colleagues is a good idea.

45% of respondents said that 2 drinks were the maximum, whilst another 38% agreed that you need to follow the cues of your office culture and if everyone else catches up for drinks you need to as well - to show you are a team player.

The question they didn't ask is how often do you need to catch up with work colleagues in a social situation?

We all know not to drink and drive. At .05 there is a marked decrease in fine motor skills and reaction times. Not a good combination when you are behind the wheel of something weighing over a tonne.

There's also general agreement that at this level (which could be as little as 2 drinks) judgement and inhibitions are also impacted.

An opinion offered that you'd normally keep to yourself, office gossip that you regret later or blabbing information that was meant to be confidential. Not crimes. But you might regret them in the morning?

Yet, the pressure to be 'part of the team' and engage can be huge. And the cost of not being part of the group can range from loosing the opportunity to get to know people better and building relationships to being 'out of the loop' and not knowing what's going on. It's quite often in more relaxed circumstances when you can hear about upcoming opportunities or the back story on an important project or customer issue.

Which is where the two drink max support is the winner...if you're still okay to drive your car then they trust their judgement to be in the drivers seat of their career.

This is what the respondents said on the Huffington Post:

It seems pretty overwhelming that most people think that socializing over a drink is important.

But, how often do you need to do the 'extra circular' social thing with work colleagues in order to be seen as a team player?

We are all busy. Careers, families, friends, exercise - there's a lot to fit in.

So, how much 'relationship building' in your own time is enough to stay in the loop?

Weekly, monthly, every now and then?

With so many competing priorities, this is something I have often debated with myself - so it will be interesting to see what you think!

Please share your thoughts on our poll:

How often do you need to socialize with work colleagues?

5 People You Need On Your Career Team

2013-01-23T08:30:00.000+11:00

Image courtesy of imagerymajestic at FreeDigitalPhotos.net

By Karen Adamedes

Nobody stands up at the Oscars, the Golden Globes or any other event where individuals are recognized and says in their acceptance speech, "Thanks, I did this all myself!".

Not only would this be seen as arrogant (to say the least) but the reality is, it's not true or even possible. No one can really "shine" without the expertise, coaching, knowledge or help of others.

When Morgan Freeman won the Oscar for Best Supporting Actor for Million Dollar Baby he said, "I want to thank everybody and anybody who ever had anything at all to do with the making of this picture." (That probably pretty well covered it!)

At the 76th Academy Awards where "Lord of the Rings: Return of the King" won all 11 categories it had been nominated for, host Billy Chrystal quipped "It's now official. There is no one left to thank in New Zealand".

Politicians who get elected (or not) thank the teams behind them, winning sports competitors, recipients of academic awards and Nobel prizes, top business people, in fact, any individual who achieves success, knows that they needed the support of others to achieve their individual accomplishments.

It makes sense that this theory applies to us mere mortals and the achievement of our goals....because they are just as important to us as internationally recognized accolades are to actors in Hollywood or players in Grand Slam tournaments.

You are probably part of many teams - the sports you play, the people you work with, project teams and many, many more.

What about your career development? Do you have a team behind you?

I don't mean the actual group of people you work with...but a team you have assembled to help you achieve your potential?

If you play a sport, you may (or may not), have a team that you compete with - depending on the activity of course...but there may be a team that enables your sporting prowess.

The coach (if you play on a team) or a personal trainer if you work out as an individual. The physio if you injure yourself. And perhaps a sports masseuse if you treat yourself to a post game/workout massage. A family member who supports you in your nutritional choices, your friends who are interested in how you are playing/progressing and even the team at the sports nutrition shop that are providing your vitamins (I suppose this example is a bit of a giveaway about the much larger than expected team I have put together to support me in my recent foray into working with a personal trainer!).

But you get the idea.

There's a lot of people needed behind the scenes required to pursue a goal.

A "career team" may never know they are part of your personally appointed entourage or hold a meeting - but they all can play a vitally important role to make sure that you can be your best.

Which raises the question, who do you need on your "career team"?

From my experience there are 5 types of people that are vital:

The Manager...sometimes in organizations you get the experience of working with an amazing manager who provides you with knowledge, develops your skills and supplies valuable insights. Other times, you get a shocker (I'm guessing no further explanation is needed - you know what I mean?).

Regardless, there is always something you can learn from a manager. In the case of a "bad" one you might learn what not to do. There is no gain in having a painful relationship with them and being adversarial...it will only make your life miserable. Even worse this person has a degree of organizational positioning over you and could block your development or opportunities in other ways. At the very least, you want a relationship where they are not going to stand in your way.

If you get a good manager - take full advantage and learn everything you can and develop a relationship where they can become a mentor, sponsor or trusted adviser.

The Mentor...your manager may fulfill the criteria of a mentor providing you with coaching, expertise and guidance...but you get them for free with your job. The opportunity is to broaden your team and add one or more people with specific skills, experience or knowledge that you have identified you want to develop. You may have one or several...it all depends on what you have worked out you need.

The Trusted Adviser...this is the person that you trust absolutely, knows you well and that you respect. Where a mentor might gently guide you - this is the person you can go to when things go wrong or you don't know where to turn. The person who will tell you like it is.

Often these relationships are built on mutual trust and respect so you might play the same role for them.

The Sponsor...now this person might not be front and center of your team. But they're there...talking you up, recommending you for projects, roles or promotions. They may not be in your immediate sphere and they may not telling you that they are recommending or speaking well of you. But if your career antenna is working - you'll get to hear who they are.

Even if you never know - they can make a tremendous contribution.

The way you develop sponsors?

Build a positive professional reputation by doing a great job and being true to your Operating Style (how you work).

The Fan...this may seem a bit self indulgent but having a fan (or more than one) can be good for your ego. Developing a career is a bit like a marathon and some stretches are harder than others and it's just really nice to know that someone thinks you are doing a great job and admires you.

A fan can also help you 'lift your game'. When you have someone looking up to you as a role model it can keep you motivated to do your best (or not slack off!)

So the next question is, do you have all these people on your team?

Can you actually put a name to them as you read through?

Who's missing?

Once you know who you need you can do something about it!

If you've got the roles all covered...excellent...Please share with us how they are helping you.

5 Truths about Performance Reviews. Are you ready for yours?

2013-01-11T14:20:00.002+11:00

By Karen Adamedes

Performance Reviews can mean more
(or less) money in your pocket

January. Whether this means snow, cold and long winter nights or sun, beach and bbq's (depending on your part of the world), for most people who work for organizations January means... the performance review!

Different countries and companies work a variety of financial years...but January is the most common time for either an annual appraisal or half yearly review.

A meeting request appears in your inbox for the meeting with your manager. Do you groan and say "Oh no, not again" or clap your hands and yell "Yippee! What a great opportunity?"

I'd be prepared to guess that the first reaction is probably the most common?

The truth about performance reviews is that they are important.

They are the chance to get your achievements, accomplishments and aspirations 'on-the-record'. This then becomes part of your official career history.

What is recorded is often what is remembered. By your manager when they consider your salary review or bonus. By their manager when team performance and talent are being discussed. By Human Resources when they are reviewing candidates for roles, projects or high potential programs. And it is also a great record for you to have to refer to for selecting your key achievements and keeping your resume updated.

Often the performance review is the only opportunity you get to make a claim or even have a discussion about your salary review. Many companies have a small budgeted amount that is distributed, relatively evenly, across all staff. Sometimes there is a little bit less for underperformers and a little bit more for high achievers. If you have made a strong contribution over the year you want to make sure that it is remembered and that you (at the very least) come out on the side of a little bit more.

Although, if you have made a really significant contribution - it's valid to state your case for a bonus or increase that is above the norm. What's the worst that can happen?

You get told no? Are you really any worse off?

Not if you have stated your case logically and supported it with business benefits and outcomes. Most importantly, that you have quantified what you have contributed (know your numbers!).

I was talking to a couple of people who worked in HR for a major consulting firm and they said to me "There's no point asking for a salary increase over and above the annual amount...the increase is locked in". I asked them if, working in HR they ever saw exceptions to this coming through. "Yes", they laughed, "all the time". Mmmm could you be an exception too?

Even if your company separates the review from the salary increase process or January is a half yearly assessment; you need to make sure that all of your contributions are noted, quantified and discussed.

You could approach that invitation for the review that your manager sent hoping that they remember everything you have delivered....OR you could make sure that you go into the meeting with solid documentation that lists and quantifies your achievements and contributions.

Are you ready for your performance review?

Another truth about performance reviews is that many managers are not good at conducting them. Sad, given their potential importance for your career, but true.

No matter how well intentioned your organization, how robust the process or the amount of time devoted to the activity - a lack of knowledge, focus or skill by a manager can turn this opportunity for career development into a tick-the-box exercise. Something that gets done for the sake of being reported that it's been done.

I have seen a significant disconnect in the perceived importance of reviews in companies. On one side are HR and senior management who value the process and want the activity to play a significant contribution in boosting productivity, developing talent and increasing employee engagement. On the opposing team are line managers who are often unskilled and inexperienced and may even be fearful of conducting the reviews.

Fearful? The managers. Yep.

They may be reluctant because they haven't had time to prepare properly or not know what you will have to say and unsure how they will handle the conversation. On the upper end of the terror scale is managers who have saved up negative feedback and have to raise a difficult issue.

The truth is that there should never be any surprises for anyone at a performance review.

Managers should be coaching their people constantly and addressing issues as they arise...not 6 months later! As @JustinFitter said on twitter in response to my question about performance reviews - goal setting, milestone reviews and performance support should be constant not scheduled.

Equally I don't think employees should be 'saving up' issues that they want to raise at these reviews. Reinforcing and quantifying achievements, setting future goals, agreeing on actions for your role and next steps for your development plan...these are the topics that should be the formalization of discussions that have been held before.

Raise issues with your manager on a regular basis. Just because they don't is no reason why you shouldn't!

The outcomes are likely to be much more positive when you give your manager a chance to think through a topic that has been raised, evaluate options or seek approval for the solutions they develop. Surprising a manager with some unexpected topic or issue at a performance review is unlikely to achieve a satisfactory result; especially in a fast time frame. And you are likely to derail the rest of the agenda.

Are there any issues you have been saving up for discussion at your review?

Can you schedule a conversation prior to your formal meeting to make sure the topic has been flagged beforehand?

You will have a much better chance of achieving an outcome and developing meaningful next steps when an issue is part of an ongoing discussion not a one-time subject.

The discussion may be a formal process that must be completed for it's own sake but the truth is that it's the 'so-what', the 'next steps' that are agreed as a result of a performance review that really matter.

Agreeing to unachievable targets for the next 6 or 12 months just to get the meeting over with is only setting yourself up for future failure.

Not quantifying or reinforcing the value of the achievements that you have contributed and having them noted is a lost opportunity for increasing your credibility and enhancing your professional reputation.

Failure to ask for the training, mentoring, coaching or whatever other assistance you need to improve your knowledge, skills and experience may cost you dearly in the future.

The next steps that are agreed at (or as a result of) your review are important to you and your career.

You have the most to gain from a review that produces tangible and actionable next steps.

Do you know what you want to achieve from your review?

The truth is that the your review has the greatest impact on you; not your manager, not HR, not your colleagues.

The truth is your review is your responsibility.

Are you ready?

What I learnt in 2012...AND what I'm going to do about it in 2013

2013-01-07T10:48:00.000+11:00

by Karen Adamedes

Just before Christmas I came across a quote by the late Randy Pausch, an American Professor and this kind of sums up my thoughts about 2012:

"Experience is what you get when you didn't get what you wanted"

Mmmmm.

Reflecting on the year that just was - what I did get was some learnings and reminders about what's important to me. To make, let's call it a tricky year, meaningful - I want to take these learnings and make sure I actually use them...take actions and develop plans not think "That's true" but then not do anything about it.

So before I dust off 2012 and put it in the 'done' draw I've been reflecting on what I have learnt AND how I am going to try and apply this in 2013.

Priorities Change

The phone rang many times in 2012 but three times were priority changing (to say the least). My mother, "I've found a lump", My sister, "The police are at Mum's to take her to the hospital. Her husband has been in a car accident", and my sister again (at one stage I was thinking of barring her calls) "I have a tumor on my pituitary gland".

I am grateful to report that Mum's breast cancer has been removed, radiotherapy is finished, she is, as one of my friends described her on a Facebook pic I posted on New Years Eve, looking foxy.

'Foxy' Mum and me

Her hubbie finally escaped from hospital after a long 12 weeks and is recovering with the addition of a titanium rod in his leg - which should make the next clearance through airport security interesting.

And as I write this my sister (minus the removed non cancerous tumor) is out shopping with her kids and preparing to celebrate my nephews birthday.

We have been lucky. Very lucky. And I am very grateful.

But gee it was tough going for a while there. Worried. Fearful. Feeling out of control.

And also feeling that nothing else much mattered. But it did. The issue was that with the ring of the phone, the ding of a text or even an email...priorities can change very quickly.

In 2013 ...

I'm going to (try) and make sure I focus on what is important and do that stuff first. Use my best energy, the best part of the day, my best me for what is important to me. Whatever it is at the time. If it's important to me then I'm not going to regret how I spend my time when priorities change. And I know that what is important to me can change in an instant.

(I'm thinking this may require the removal of a few distracting apps from my iPad - but I'll see how my willpower goes first!)

Learning new stuff is hard

After a minor shoulder injury that took too long to recover I decided that enough was enough and I needed to get actually learn how to use the machines in the gym I had been going to for the last four years and get healthy and fit (and to be perfectly honest lose some weight too).

With some reluctance I realized I needed expert help.

My previous theory was that I knew how to use the bike and treadmill and I know how to eat so if I just go to the gym more often and stick to the diet, I should be able to figure it out and achieve my goals. Turns out this theory was about as accurate as the one about the world being flat.

So I signed up with a personal trainer. When I found out the sessions were an hour long and that this did not include a workout and time for a coffee I realized that I had committed to something a little bit more than I bargained for.

The first few weeks were especially tough. I felt like an idiot. My trainer (who does not seem to register my fact based comments like "my legs hurt") would show me how to do simple exercises that used my core and I just could not get them! "I've never done anything like this before" I thought. "I have no point of reference, no past experience to draw on to figure this out. I started writing my next book so that I would be spending more time on an activity that I felt competent at.

I can leg press 120 lb / 55 kg now!

Over the coming weeks as I got a little fitter and had a bit of practice I realized I have actually being walking and leaning and standing my whole life so I did have some experience to draw from...but at the time, man, I felt like I was in a whole new world.(I'm quite sure the trainer has a few more tricks up his sleeve and I will feel that way again!)

Fourteen weeks on and I feel stronger, I've lost a little weight - and am pleased that I have stuck it out so far.

I probably will always remember my "Turkey moment" at Thanksgiving (we don't normally celebrate this holiday in Australia - but I love it!) when I called my husband to lift the heavy bird into the oven and realized I had been lifting heavier weights over my head for the last few weeks so I didn't need any help. I didn't actually power lift the turkey, stuffing and veg through the air...but they did make it into the oven with no problem!

Learning new stuff is hard but there is real joy when it starts to kick in. The turkey was pretty good too!

The turkey made it in and out of the oven!

In 2013 ...

Stick with training...I have more gains in 27 sessions with my trainer than the other 350 sessions at the gym I had done on my own over the last 4 years. I value the expertise that a coach brings to me. I still have a looong way to go on achieving my goals and a lot more to learn. But I know that I need the support that a coach provides. (Let's kill it in 2013 JP!)

Apply my insights into my own work as a business coach and mentor; I really understand that learning new stuff is hard! I want to work with my clients to achieve their 'turkey moments'. They keep you going when the going gets hard (again!)

Learn some more new things...if I can squat wearing a weight vest I am pretty sure I can tackle a few new challenges!

It's what you do that counts

This lesson came from my brother and his gorgeous wife and family. Not by anything they said but the fact that they flew across the world, and organised their whole year around being in Australia for my birthday celebration.

"I told you" he said "Tell us where you are going to be celebrating and we will be there".

Having been a little recalcitrant about celebrating this particular birthday, no plans were made until they announced they were turning up in my home town; regardless. And turn up they did.

It turned out to be a happy occasion and a high point of the year. Made possible because of the effort that many of my family and friends made to be in the one place at the the same time.

Some of my favorite people celebrated with me!

In 2013 ...

I'm not just going to talk about what I want to do. I am going to do it!

From the people I'd like to see, the trips I'd like to take and even the type of businesses I work with. Write my blogs not just read about writing blogs etc. etc.

2013 is about action not reaction!

Action can make good things happen (like the photo above!)

I love what I do

Work is not who I am. But it is what you do.

And that's important.

If you're going to spend your life doing something...I figure it's much more fun if you enjoy it. Writing, speaking, mentoring, data analysis, presentations, strategies and action plans...it's what I do and I am energized when I do these things (maybe sometimes not so much the data analysis...but it has its moments!).

Strategic assignments, speaking engagements, facilitating change and client mentoring - l have really enjoyed my work this year. The knowledge, skills and experience I have gained throughout my career (so far) give me the opportunity, the choice, to do what I love. That is a good thing!

Out and about at a book signing!

In 2013 ...

Build on what I do - publish a new book (maybe two?), new business ventures, more clients! Work with people who stimulate my thinking and creativity and who let me do the same for them.

Doesn't seem too much to ask does it?

2013 is full of possibilities

The trick is to take the actions that make possible what any of us want to achieve.

For me, applying just some of the learnings from last year - focusing on priorities, learning new things, taking action and pursuing the things that I love to do seems like a pretty good framework to approach the year with...

Would love to hear what your learnings were from 2012 and more importantly, what you are going to do about them in 2013?

Thanks for the chat!

Karen

PS to all those who matter (you know who you are!) and who were part of 2012 - thank you!

Are you being paid fairly? What to do when you're not

2012-12-06T14:26:00.001+11:00

The New York Times columnist, Maureen Franks wrote,

"The minute you settle for less that you deserve, you get even less than you settled for"

As someone who once experienced the 'joy' of finding out I was being paid less than my peers - I agree!

It not only impacted my pay packet but my perceived 'ranking' in the hierarchy, perceptions about my negotiating ability and once I was aware of the situation, my sense of being undervalued.

There are lots of reasons why we work. But unless you are independently wealthy or have significant 'expectations' - money is one of them!

It may not be your only motivation but it is one of them. Often we want to do something worthwhile, make a contribution, be challenged and be paid fairly.

It's when you find out that you are being underpaid compared to your peers who have the same role, skills and experience that resentment sets in.

The Capuchin monkey in this experiment literally showed his feelings quite plainly when he realized he was being ripped off and paid in cucumber rather than grapes like his friend next door. (This video was showcased by Frans de Waal during a TED presentation...view the whole video here)

Or just see the monkey's reaction...

Personally I am not a big fan of cucumber so if it was socially acceptable I would happily throw it across the room...however tempting I find it - social convention dictates this is not an option that I have. I can't see a waiter being all that thrilled with cucumber missiles ending up in their hair.

The same way that your manager may feel ambushed if you confront them about pay inequity.

They might not realize this is the case or they may not be be responsible for the situation. (In large companies that have restructures and reorganizations this may well be the case.)

They may not be empowered to deal with the situation immediately (larger organizations = multiple approvals, varying delegation levels and human resources teams).

Or the jungle drums that you have picked up on that lead you to believe you're being paid in cucumbers rather than grapes might not be accurate - or there might be more to the situation than you know.

Now this may seem to be being extremely empathetic to the managers position - and they may just be trying to get away with whatever they can - but this is often not so. So a measured approach would be my recommendation.

If you do find yourself in this situation here's some ideas I would consider:

1. Take a deep breath and work out your plan of action. Flying off the handle with an emotional reaction is unlikely to resolve the issue in your favor. Tempting may be but others will just become defensive.

2. Confirm your facts if you can without breaching anyone's privacy or upsetting them.

3. Meet with your manager to discuss the issue. Let them know in advance that you would like to discuss your salary/bonus (whatever the issue relates to) as the meeting may be much more effective if they are not caught by surprise.

4. Raise the issue - calmly and factually.

5. Listen to the response and take notes if that helps you stay focused.

6. Have the data available that supports the value that you are contributing. This might be the results of your last performance review, current sales numbers, productivity figures or cost savings you have made. Know your numbers. Ultimately the issue is if you are being paid what you are worth not what others are receiving.

7. Be prepared to negotiate as the issue may need to be rectified in line with the company salary review cycle or there may be performance achievements that you can tie to a commitment for a future salary increase.

8. Don't let it fester and build up resentment against your manager, colleagues or organization. The only person that will feel bad is you. As long as you approach the issue in a professional manner in line with your own operating style raising the issue will enhance not distract from your credibility.

If the situation can't be resolved and you need to appeal to a higher manager or hr this is something you will need to do on a case by case basis. Talk with a mentor or trusted adviser (not the person in the next cubicle) if you need to make decisions about taking the situation further or voting with your feet and leaving the organization. This can often help to provide unbiased and helpful input to your decision making.

Go for the grape - don't just throw the cucumber!

Karen Adamedes is a career strategist & mentor, author, speaker and experienced business executive. These tips are from Karen's forthcoming book "What to do when... ideas for everyday career dilemmas" (2013) For more articles and tips:

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5 great quotes about success at work

2012-12-05T17:05:00.001+11:00

“The more you lose yourself in something bigger than yourself, the more energy you will have.”

- Norman Vincent Peale

“The only place where success comes before work is in the dictionary.”

- Vidal Sassoon

“Success is liking yourself, liking what you do, and liking how you do it.”

- Maya Angelou

"I can not do everything, but I can do something. I must not fail to do the something that I can do."

- Helen Keller

"There are three rules of success. The first: Go on. The second: Go on. And the third: Go on."

- Frank Cane

Words worth pondering from Dale Carnegie...

2012-11-23T09:04:00.000+11:00

When you prioritize what's important...

2012-11-22T17:10:00.001+11:00

Prioritization means making choices about what's important.

It's not about what you have the capability to do - but the capacity.

There are just so many hours in a day!

It's unrealistic to think you can do everything.

Choose what you truly need and want to do.

This will give you the confidence that your time is being spent on what is most important.

And make sure that's what you do!

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To present with panache...know your audience...

2012-11-15T15:41:00.002+11:00

What do they want to know?

What problem are they trying to solve?

How can you help them?

Answer these questions, address them in your presentation and your audience will truly value your presentation!

Download here

A crucial career skill is to keep across what's going on...

2012-11-07T10:37:00.000+11:00

Times of change can bring opportunity.

Or have a significant impact on you.

Whether you want to take advantage of an opportunity or be prepared to enact your Career Plan B if things do not look favorable - it helps if you have some idea about what might be happening. So that you can have an impact on your future, not have it just happen to you.

Make sure your 'radar' is on so that you are aware and can see the signs of change.

Look for clues such as:

Organizational change
Restructures
Management changes
Major new customer contracts
Industry developments
Activity by your competitors
Bad tempers or behaviors by management (or a spring in their step)

If you actively keep across what is going on you'll learn to recognize times of change.

A good reason to ramp up your networking, make some calls and meet a few people for coffee (as if you need an excuse!)

I think this is an essential skill to be in control of your career!

- Karen

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What to do when...you're caught in an email war

2012-11-01T01:49:00.000+11:00

The opportunities for misunderstandings, misinterpretations and conflict over email are many. Without meaning too - it's not hard to end up in the middle of a conflict on email that you have to work your way out of - even if you're not sure how it started in the first place!

With most people receiving at least 100 emails a day at work - it's easy to understand how quick messages, sent when you're in a hurry, stressed or thinking about something else, may not be your (or someone else's) best literary effort.

But an email war does not do anybody any good.

For a start it's not an efficient way to resolve an issue or seek a resolution to a business problem. And nobody comes out of a written email conflict with an enhanced business reputation - especially if it's a public battle and there are lots of people copied or included on the email.

You could be caught in an email battle (or be caught in an ambush) in a variety of ways.

You've sent off a quick email and it's been misinterpreted and elicited an angry response. There are more than enough challenges ensuring that what you mean is what people actually understand you to mean when you are talking to them. And that's when you have the benefit of your body language, pitch and tone of voice to help convey what you mean. In writing it's even harder! Something you write sounding one way in your head can be taken quite another on email.

Alternatively someone is frustrated by a situation and fires off a message with half the world (well, it seems like it) included or cc'd on the message. Their reason may have been fine (these are all the people involved in the issue, they think) but what they actually do is create a messy situation that results in multiple emails and often confusion about who is doing what. (The saying about too many cooks in a kitchen applies to email as well!) Someone gets upset, a little bit terse and before you know it the emails are flying back and forth and a proverbial mountain has been made out of the molehill.

Or even worse (I think) is the person who sends emails and copies their manager or other 'important' people in order to get a response. I think this is a very heavy handed approach and akin to bullying. It certainly demonstrates that the person the email has been sent to isn't trusted to do what has been asked. (There's a lot to this topic of email cc'ing that I'll tackle in my next post!) Or that the person sending it is too lazy to negotiate!

What it often comes down to is that the person who has been copied often feels the need to weigh in on the issue, be directive or want explanations and you have more email havoc!

Whoever starts it or however you got involved (your fault or not) the trick is how to get out of the conflict, resolve the issue and ensure that relationships and reputations (particularly yours!) are not damaged.

Consider these options:

Get off email

The best way I've found to diffuse the situation is to take the issue off email and call or go to see the key person involved.

You'll have the advantage of being able to ask questions, get immediate answers and be able to respond appropriately in a very short time frame. You'll also be able to use body language and voice tones and intonations (both yours and theirs) to support the communication. This will help you understand where they are coming from and assist you reinforce or position what you are saying. A little bit of gentle humor can work wonders in a conversation. On email it often doesn't work at all.

An actual conversation can really help take the heat out of a situation that is about to implode on email.

Making contact offline also shows that you have prioritized the issue and are concerned about their position by taking the time, interest and energy to make a call. It is usually well worth the effort. And if a 5 minute phone call saves 5 emails back and forth in all probability it's going to be a lot faster!

Talk to the key person

The situation is going to dictate who is the best person for you to talk to about the issue. If an email is only between you and one other person - then they're the one you call!

But if there are multiple people involved - have a quick think what is the cleverest way to get to the best resolution. If it's your manager or senior stakeholder you will want to talk to them.

Depending on the situation it may be that another quick call to one of the others involved to find out the information you need or agree on the resolution is needed before you make the call to your manager.

If there are delays in getting a response or the answer you need I would make a call to the senior person and let them know why you're calling, what you are doing to resolve the issue and exactly when you will be back to them with more information.

If you do need to reply by email:

Be clear

There are some circumstances (time zones, availability etc.) where the issue has to stay on email.

Be really clear in what you write; don't say anything that can be subject to misinterpretation. Ask someone to proof read your response to make sure that your meaning is obvious.

Take the emotion out

Don't reply to an email when you are angry or emotional. Go for a walk, do something else and it at all possible, leave it until the next day before you respond. Angry exchanges back and forth will ignite, not resolve, a situation.

Remove the cc's

If you do need to respond by email it's better if you can do it without an audience. Whoever has been copied is likely to have opinions or want to become involved - which will just add complexity to the resolution of the issue.

Communicate with the other party involved directly. Once you have achieved the outcome you can then go back to the cc's and let them know the outcome. Most will be relieved that the problem is solved and that they haven't had to be subject to multiple emails.

Manage expectations

If there's going to be a time lag before there is a conclusion you might want to send just one email and let people know what is happening and that you will let them know the outcome. You'll be seen as professional, the emails will be reduced and most importantly everyone can get on with business.

A follow up note

Every time I suggest that calling or going to see the person involved might be an effective way of resolving an issue I get comments like "but I need an email trail" or "there won't be a record of who said what".

Which is true.

But I think it's often used as an excuse to stay behind the safety of a keyboard rather than have to have a tough conversation. And unfortunately some organizational cultures require that you cover your back by having proof of everything that happens (the business equivalent of a Kevlar vest?)

The way around this is to send a follow up email after any offline conversations or agreements. For example, "Just a quick note to confirm our agreement on .... to ...." or " A short note to thank you for helping to resolve..."

This provides another chance to confirm the outcome, reinforce your professionalism and gives you a record of what was discussed or agreed.

George Clemenceau once said, “It’s far easier to make war than peace”. When it comes to email I reckon, It’s far easier to take the time to resolve a conflict than deal with the consequences!

Thanks for the chat! - Karen

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When career opportunities emerge...

2012-10-25T13:18:00.000+11:00

Be prepared when career opportunities emerge.

Do some quick thinking.

Compare with your career plan.

Talk to your mentor or trusted advisers in your network.

If it's right for you...do something about it.

Formally apply. Tell someone who matters that you are interested.

You must be in it to have a chance!

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Networking: It's not meant to be like speed dating

2012-10-18T11:49:00.002+11:00

Well this is my first experiment with a video blog!

My hair had just been 'done', face made up and back in the office from a client meeting - so I thought I would give it a go (I must confess it took more than one take to get the video masterpiece you see before you <sarcasm alert>)!

In the video I talk about networking and the 5 reasons why I think it's an important investment of your time. And not at all like speed dating where the objective is to collect as many business cards as you can and then move on to someone better.

So, here goes...

The reasons I think networking is a worthwhile use of your time and not a discretionary activity is because you can:

Learn new information or knowledge from others

Get ideas and be energized by what other people are doing

Meet new people with whom you can build mutually beneficial business relationships

Educate yourself on 'who's who in the zoo' in your company or industry, who knows who and how they fit together

Let other people get to know you and about you; your knowledge, skills, experience and what you have to offer.

All good reasons to step away from your desk and go spend some time with people.

Let me know what you think!

- Karen

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What to do when...you're offered a coffee in a business meeting

2012-10-17T09:11:00.000+11:00

If you are a coffee aficionado or in any way fussy about your hot beverages - you might want to stop reading this now. Because I see the acceptance of an offered coffee in a business meeting as an opportunity. Not only an opportunity for the a nice hot cuppa but an opportunity to guide the tone and pace of the meeting.
And if that means sipping through the last cold dregs in the bottom of your cup to buy you a little extra time…that’s something I am prepared to do.

In an earlier post Why i drink cold coffee in business meetings I talked about how accepting a coffee can help with a meeting. The question I then got asked was "how does it all work when I get offered a coffee?

So here's some quick guidelines...When offered a coffee in a business meeting:

Say yes

It can help with the pace of the meeting as I’ve described. It’s also polite to say yes as the person making the offer is extending their hospitality and it sets a more relaxed tone for the discussion ahead. It could be that it’s just the other person’s first chance to have a coffee that they have been hanging out for. Don’t deny them the opportunity!

Request an alternative

If you are not a coffee drinker it’s perfectly okay to ask for a replacement. “Would a tea be okay?” or “I’ll take a water, thank you” are more than reasonable requests. ‘Coffee’ has become an euphemism for any type of drink on offer. So don’t feel compelled to accept something you just wouldn't

drink. There are only so many sacrifices you can make for your career!

Or decline politely

What? “I thought you said to say yes?” you are probably thinking about now? Well I did. But there are always exceptions and sometimes it just doesn’t feel right. You might pick up from the mood of the room or the body language of the other person that the offer has only been made out of politeness and that they really want to get straight down to business.

If you're not sure ask "Are you having one?" and if they're not I would decline. You don't want to slow a meeting down because everyone is waiting on you.

If the offer is made by a third party and the most senior person in the room looks impatient to get on with stuff, if that’s the case, thank them for the offer and say no (nicely!)

The thank you

Even though you have said thanks when the coffee is served and regardless of what has been achieved or not during the meeting make sure you include a “thanks for the coffee” acknowledgement in your meeting wrap up. It’s a nice acknowledgement, it’s respectful and it also widens the meeting wrap up from just purely business issues. (And your mother would probably be proud of you too!)

Thanks for your time..I'm going to grab a coffee!

- Karen

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Forget Julia Gillard, the speech and the double standards of politics. Sexism is not funny (or clever)

2012-10-14T14:54:00.001+11:00

Height ...career success? Really?

It is 2012? Right?

I'm confused because I just read an 'opinion' piece in an Australian newspaper that has me outraged and thinking that I have traveled in some sort of time machine backwards about 40 years. Or more.

You may have heard that Australia's Prime Minister, Julia Gillard, had her say in parliament this week and called out the leader of the Opposition for his sexist behavior, labeling him a misogynist. That this speech was made in the context of a messy political environment (that I don't think anyone in politics comes out from looking good) - has divided Australians on the speech. Internationally, however, without the political context, it has been met with a number of favorable comments.

But forget Julia Gillard, the speech and the double standards of politics.

It is the commentary on the issue of sexism that I find scary. And outrageous that things like this (that I read in this mornings paper) could be said,

"Playing the gender card is the pathetic last refuge of incompetents and everyone in the real world knows it. It offends the Australian notion of the fair go"

No one has the right to stand up for themselves because of gender or any other bias? You only do it when you are incompetent and have no other card to play? Really?

It's not okay to say something when you are being paid less than your male counterpart with equal experience or are excluded from discussions? The appropriate response to ribald jokes and sexist comments is to grit your teeth with a smile and keep working? Turn the other cheek?

The article then went on to to provide some discussion about whether men actually have an innate advantage when it comes to opportunities for powerful jobs,

"For instance, voice is important to demonstrate authority. Men with a booming baritone command attention.

Height is another issue. Men are usually taller than women, and height generally correlates with high office."

Really?

Apparently because I am only about 5 ft. 2 inches (1.58 m) I missed this measure of success. Angela Merkel, the Chancellor or Germany who is spearheading economic recovery efforts in Europe, didn't get the memo either given she is reported to be 5 ft 4 in. (1.65 m). Nor did Hilary Clinton at 5 ft 6 (1.73)! And these chicks don't hold powerful positions at all (yes that is sarcasm!)

But wait there's more,

"The dearth of women in high places is not because of sexism any more than it is because they lack talent."

Excuse me?

The empirical evidence is overwhelmingly that women perform equally well in business. And in fact Catalyst has published reports that companies with higher female representation on boards outperform on the measures of return on equity, return on sales and return on invested capital.

A Mckinsey study "Women Matter" found that of the 89 European companies with the highest level of gender diversity in their top management positions - they outperformed their sector on return on equity, operating result and stock price growth.

Lack talent? Bah humbug! I would continue but I want to get this off my chest and go back to enjoying my Sunday!

Look there has been a lot of balanced commentary, and the same newspaper that ran this piece also had an article "Evidence sexism is rife in Australian workplaces is the small number of female CEOs" which included a quote by Helen Conway, the director of the Equal Opportunity for Women in the Workplace Agency that "The focus should be on gender equality and making it normal for men and women." Hurrah!

I might not have a booming baritone - but I do have a voice. And I just want to say that I don't think anyone being sexist is funny (or clever).

It's ironic as just this morning (before my coffee and astonished newspaper reading) I was considering whether I should move my career blogging to a more 'gender-neutral' site. Because I am passionate that everyone who wants to pursue a career should have access to information to develop their skills to be able realize their potential. And it takes a brave guy to hang around a site called Career Chick Chat for information!

But this article changed my mind. Women need a voice. A place to learn the skills. I'm staying here and everyone is welcome to visit.

Really!

- Karen

P.S. You can read the article I refer to here...but spoiler alert...it might make you cross!

P.S. 2 - I am now getting off my soap box and back to my Sunday...

Why I drink cold coffee in business meetings

2012-10-12T13:11:00.000+11:00

I know coffee purists would be aghast but I must admit I quite enjoy the last few drops of the ice cold coffee that lie in wait at the bottom of a cup (that started out hot!) at the end of a business meeting.

They have an “I’m-ready-to-leave-and-be-on-my-way” taste about them. An acquired flavor for sure and one I discovered quite by accident.

My weekend coffee is another matter; piping hot, brewed perfectly and preferably grown on an ecologically sustainable plantation by fairly paid workers (have I missed anything?). But in a work setting my coffee standards are rather different.

The first time I accepted a hot drink (to be honest I can’t remember if it was tea or coffee) at a business meeting it was in response to “I’m having a coffee, would you like one too?” offer from the customer I was meeting about his office phones. “Great,” I thought, “a cuppa will be lovely”. And as the meeting progressed I realized that the mood was quite relaxed as we sipped away whilst discussing the relative merits of two different telephone systems.

This was the start of the “great coffee experiment” I conducted over the next few years of my sales career. Where I found that not only did accepting a refreshment make the meeting more relaxed it also gave some natural structure to it’s pace. Small talk (relationship building!) until the coffee arrived, a segue into the business discussion as the coffee is stirred and then down to business.

The great accidental discovery that I made (a bit like Penicillin but without the Nobel prize) was that I could influence how long I got to spend with a customer based on how slowly I drank. Most people are generally polite. Particularly those who offer you a coffee in the first place. And they don’t tend to kick you out if they know that you’re still drinking. (I’ve found that it does help to hold the cup in your hand if you don’t want there to be any doubt that you are still enjoying their hospitality).

This discovery gave me the opportunity to gain a few extra precious minutes of discussion that were so important to ensure that I built as much rapport as possible. And that I had the time at the end of the meeting that I like to confirm the participants understanding of where we had got to and to clarify next steps. Items that all so often get sacrificed as people are rushing off to their next back-to-back appointment.

In many years of field testing I can report that it works with all types of beverages but hot ones are best as you can work in the “wow, this coffee is taking a while to cool down” into the conversation. And it works in reverse. A meeting not going as well as expected can be hurried along (a little bit) by drinking up nice and quickly.

The cold coffee technique can also be applied in internal meetings, networking catch-ups and with most anyone. I’ve broadened my acceptance criteria from the ‘I’ll-have-one-if-you-have one’ response to a yes to any tea, coffee or water that is offered; and whether it’s offered by the person I’m actually meeting with or the assistant who is setting up the meeting.

This is not for the purpose of outstaying your welcome, being disrespectful of others time or wasting it. You need to use the extra time you buy for good (business discussion, asking questions, building rapport) and not evil (talking drivel, being repetitive, delving into detail that others don’t need to hear about).

It’s a bit like the law of gravity - once the apple leaves the tree there’s nothing stopping it headed downwards, once the coffee’s on the table it might go cold but I can control how fast it goes.

And that tastes good!

- Karen

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The key to a successful business presentation

2012-10-11T13:16:00.001+11:00

No matter how experienced you are as a presenter it is essential to plan, rehearse and prepare!

There is no substitute.

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5 Tips for managing your work and your career

2012-10-10T16:48:00.000+11:00

With the multitude of tasks that we fully expect to be able to juggle, the relentless requests for us to do more and the desire to always perform at our best (and this is just at work!) learning the skills of how to work and manage your career are more important than ever.

Here are 5 of my top tips to help you manage your work and your career:

1. Decide what's important to you.

To be your best you need to decide what is the most important use of your time and energy. It’s unrealistic to try to deal with every one of the multitude of demands that come at you, this approach comes at the cost of not being able to do anything well.

Prioritize the three most important areas of focus for your job. Be honest with yourself about what is essential to meet the key deliverables of your job, the time-frames available and for you. Use the old "what's important versus urgent" test to help you separate the multiple tasks you have on your plate.

If you find it hard to make this decision, ask your manager, something like, “If you had to prioritize the three most important things I need to deliver what would they be?” This should give you enough information to know about what to focus on.

2. Simplify your expectations

And work out how much you can realistically do. Bear in mind that you may not be able to do everything that you want. It is crucial to understand that just because you have the capability to do everything (you might have the skills to write a business plan, negotiate with suppliers, answer emails, train the new person, redo the company website and wash all the dishes left in the kitchen) the chances are that you don't have the capacity (as in enough hours in the day) to do it all. Learning to live with this reality is something that many people find difficult to reconcile. But you have to.

3. Don't multi-task

No matter how much you have to do, ignore stereotypes and expectations that you do everything at the same time. Women are often seen as the ultimate multi-taskers. Scientific studies now suggest that this may not be the most efficient way of working due to the downtime and significant effort that is required to swap between tasks. Superheroes belong in comic books and movies, not in real life. You may feel that you need extraordinary powers just to juggle everything that is expected of you on a daily basis. But you don’t. Concentrate on one task and do it well.

4. Look after yourself

So that you are able operate at your best! This is absolutely essential to achieve and maintain career success. No matter how busy you are, you need to prioritize the things that help you look after yourself. This could be anything from maintaining your appearance to enjoying things that you would usually feel guilty about. Like having a manicure, spa treatment, a massage or attending a yoga class. While some people are more likely to notice the overall effect than little details like a good hair-cut make, others certainly will. It sends a message that you are well-organized and in control, so consider time for yourself as an investment in your career.

5. Be good at what you do

This the foundation of your career and your potential success. One of the major differences between those who are good at what they do and those who really get ahead is that they don’t settle for less than their best and they are constantly looking for ways to improve.
It is more important that you put effort into fewer tasks but they are done well, very well. Being prepared to do a little more than others will give you an edge over your competitors, both in a business and a career sense. This will positively influence not only for your career reputation, but also your own confidence and sense of achievement.

And isn't that a great definition of career success? ☺

- Karen

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How should you start a relationship with a mentor?

2012-10-04T16:45:00.000+10:00

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5 reasons you SHOULD apply for a job or promotion

2012-09-27T16:13:00.002+10:00

There are good reasons to decide to apply

It's not that you're not ambitious. Or that you don't want a job.

But for many of us the decision to apply for a new role or promotion can leave us plagued with doubts.

"I don't have every single thing they have asked for in the advertisement" to "I'm not the front runner - there will be too many other people applying" to (even worse) "if they wanted me to apply they would have asked..."

Sound familiar? (Not from you, of course...other people...)

Not applying for a job or roles that you are capable of performing holds you back in your career. And it's not just because you miss out on the role - you're also missing out on the chance to tell and sell who you are and the value you would bring to a role.

"Job applications are an opportunity."

Here's 5 reasons why I think it's important to put up your hand and apply for the job you want:

1. You might actually get the job!

Changing jobs often provides a major leap forward for your career. It's the optimum time to increase the breadth of your accountabilities and to negotiate a higher salary.

Even if you are not the most obvious candidate (in your mind anyway) you may be the best fit and get the job. If you don't apply - you will never know!

2. The process to be recruited or promoted is an opportunity to quantify, reflect on and assess your career progress.

It takes preparation, time and effort to put a credible application together. The process of updating your resume, writing a cover letter and preparing for an interview is an ideal opportunity to think about what you have delivered, where you are in your career and where you want to go next.

You'll need to be prepared for the "Why do you want this role?" question that is sure to be asked at an interview. Preparing that answer will help provide clarity about where you are headed and how the role fits into your overall plan.

3. The opportunity for exposure

Not the hypothermia / need to go to hospital type exposure - I mean it's an opportunity to have dedicated time with more senior people in your company (or a different organization) talking about you!

Whether at a job interview or even through the process of having your resume evaluated - a job application is the ideal opportunity to tell who you are and outline (in quantifiable terms) exactly what you can do, have done and the value of what you have previously delivered.

You'll be highly visible to people who are in the position to make decisions about your career, either now or in the future.

4. Signal that you are ready to move on or up

You might not get the job you apply for (sad, but sometimes true) but managers often remember the people they have interviewed previously and consider them for future roles. I have seen many instances where someone has applied for a role and their manager has said. "I didn't know they wanted to move / ready for a change" etc. Many times this has actually resulted in the person being offered additional training, a mentor or other development opportunities. If your manager is any good at all - it should at least lead to a discussion about your future plans and aspirations.

5. Increases your credibility

An application for a role that is aligned with your career plan allows you to be a credible applicant. It can reinforce that you have a aspirations and a plan and these can be persuasive indicators that you are a professional.

If you think you have the credibility to apply for a role...there's lots of reasons why you should...it's up to you to decide to apply!

Thoughts?

- Karen

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Job Applications are an opportunity....

2012-09-26T12:41:00.001+10:00

Others won't know you're there or what you have done if you don't tell them!

Even if you're not the front-runner or don't have 200% of the requirements of a job, as long as you are credible - an application can be a great way to let people know who you are, what you've achieved and that you are interested in moving forward in your career.

You can download this tip here!

How I found my business network

2012-09-25T15:06:00.001+10:00

Networking can be as simple as a coffee catch up

Do you remember the scene in Shrek (the first movie) when Donkey was making an absolute pest of himself, jumping up and down behind all the fairy-tale creatures, repeatedly, until in the end he wore Shrek down and was picked to go on the quest to find Lord Farquaad?

Hilarious, but not so funny was that this was how I saw business networking for many years.

I was at a sales conference many years ago, the dinner was over, the speeches were done and we were meant to be ‘networking’.

I can still recall looking across the room and seeing a number of my colleagues gathered around the management team, and rather like Donkey, trying to be seen and impress how clever, witty or capable they thought they were.

I didn’t want to do that. I didn’t know how to do that (what on earth do you say, I wondered?) and frankly, I didn’t think that the end of a long day after a couple of red wines was the time for a best-impression.

So I chatted for a while and made my excuses.

Which I also did on many a Friday night when the sales team I worked in was headed down the pub to ‘network'’ with the support staff and technicians who looked after our customers.

I don’t know about you but by Friday night I’m done.

I had friends to catch up with, grocery shopping to do, dinner to cook or even some stolen moments in front of the TV to fit in. I’d worked long and hard enough by Friday night and I wanted to go home.

“You need to network” I was told when I declined yet another Friday night invitation and headed off to my life – now feeling guilty that somehow I wasn’t fitting in everything I needed to do. I also felt incredibly uncomfortable going to ‘networking’ events where I’d go home with a pile of business cards and no idea what to do with them.

Everyone tells you that it’s important to network.

And I truly believe it is.

When you develop deep business relationships, they are an unbelievable and generous source of information, ideas, contacts and even support when things don’t go your way. I thought I was missing out big time.

And then one-day I woke up (it wasn't just one-day, but you get the gist!) and discovered that I had an enormous network. I just hadn’t realised it.

I had worked at the one organisation for many years and worked with and for many great people.

I’d had coffee and lunches with them, worked on exciting and successful projects and on others that were stressful and hard work; laughed with them, helped them and been helped by them.

Along the way my connections with the ‘people I worked with’ and ‘people I met through work’ had developed into deep mutually beneficial business relationships (and some into friends – but that’s another story) – and hey, presto - I did have a network!

It took moving away from the day-to-day contact for me to realise that’s what they were. The clues about how to keep them in my network were in the past – a coffee here, a lunch there, an occasional email on topics of mutual interest and I was networking. It just took a bit more thought and organisation than when they were sitting in the same office.

The real surprise came when I moved to my next company and realised that it was expected that I would still be keeping up with past colleagues and the last industry I had worked in. Woo Hoo!

Networking was a legitimate activity I was meant to be doing as part of working in business. I didn’t have to sneak out at lunch time, make excuses or feel guilty!

My network has changed as I, and the ‘people-I-know’ have progressed in our careers, I’ve met new people and my network now extends to people in all sorts of jobs and organisations and many are scattered all over the world.

I do attend a couple of formal networking organisations now because I met some new great people that I share interests with - and it's fun.

It’s my network – why shouldn’t it be?

And not a donkey in sight!

- Karen

5 Fast Tips for when you don't get the recognition you deserve (at work, anyway...)

2012-09-20T08:23:00.000+10:00

Get the recognition you deserve

Recognition can be a formal award or reward or it can be as simple as a thank you.

We often don't do what we are doing because we want the recognition. We do it because it's our job, we want to, we get paid for it or a whole host of other reasons.

But sometimes when it's missing - it can be gut-wrenching.

Ever been looked over for a promotion? A salary increase or bonus? Or feel you deserved a "thanks, good job" that you didn't get?

It can make you feel like your contributions aren't valued? That you are taken for granted? Or that you must have accidentally slipped on Harry Potter's invisibility coat?

Repeated occurrences can be a symptom of a bigger issue like a bad manager or a toxic work environment. Or something very minor like bad timing or people having too much on their plate to notice.

It might be that your achievements and contributions weren't visible enough and you need to work on being seen to raise your visibility. Or it might be that there is something else going on that you don't know about.

Whatever the reason a disappointment can be used to assess where you are and what you should do next.

Here are 5 Fast Tips to consider:

1. Evaluate how important the issue is...if it's a one time miss or a repeated behavior this can have a significant bearing on whether you just want to 'let it go' or follow up and find out why and what you can do about it.

2. Consult with your mentor...or a trusted adviser and get their opinion on the situation. This can be a really good guide to whether your reaction is valid and if there is an issue that should be explored further.

3. Ask questions...to really dig into the issue. Talk with your manager and ask whether you were considered for the opportunity or for a little bit of background information on the issue. Sometimes there is a whole lot more going on behind the scenes that we don't know about - and if you ask you have a lot higher chance of finding out than if you don't!

This can be an opportunity to uncover if you're considered 'not ready' for whatever the opportunity was and opens the door for a training or coaching conversation. Or even just a chance to share your goals and aspirations;

"If you don't tell people what you want it significantly reduces your chance of them helping you get it!"

Or you might be on the way to deciding you're in the wrong job or working for the wrong manager (for you!)

Whatever the outcome ...whatever you find out...it means that you have an opportunity to do something about it...

4. Use the opportunity...and put a plan into action. It could range from a proactive campaign to increase your visibility, an opportunity to work on your objectives with your manager or the start of the realization that you need to make some changes (Career Plan B, anyone?). Whatever the opportunity you will be further ahead than before you followed up.

5. File away the disappointment...after you have asked for feedback, evaluated what you have learnt and (if necessary) put a plan into place...let it go and move on. Holding onto disappointment or resentment will only make you feel bad (for longer, anyway!)

Learn don't yearn! Any thoughts?

- Karen

Ever had what you said at work misinterpreted?

2012-09-18T14:05:00.000+10:00

It happens to us all!

So many words have different meanings and interpretations. Dictionary.com has 97 definitions of the little three letter word "run"...and that's just the verb!!

Increase the chances that what you mean is what is heard by thinking about the words that you choose. Sometimes the simple ones are the best!

You can download this tip here!

What to do when...you start writing a career guide

2012-09-17T15:47:00.000+10:00

You write a blog about it?

Sound like good creative avoidance to not get started?

Well, kind of...but not really.

(That's my story and I am sticking to it!)

Where I want to start is by asking you, the potential readers, to get involved and tell me what kind of everyday career dilemmas you experience?

So I can include them in the book (and on the blog too!).

Because there is a very real chance that if there are situations at work that you are not quite sure what your options are - or even just need a choice of alternatives to consider - there are others in exactly the same kind of predicaments!

The idea is for the book to be a reference guide with a range of different situations that you might encounter at work, or more generally in your career - and provide a range of options and ideas for you to consider. Think of it like a career version of Wikipedia!

The plan for the book so far ranges from what to do when you need to raise your career visibility, to when you work with someone you don't get on with, to when you get an email that makes you angry. And a whole lot of other topics in between.

I'd love it if you could help and let me know the situations at work where you would like some ideas and options to consider...or where this would have been of value in the past.

Please leave your ideas below, on facebook or twitter. Or email me directly (and confidentially) at karen@careerchickchat.com

I look forward to chatting with you!

Karen

PS Watch out for future updates and I'll let you know how I am going with the writing!