'Cause I Said So

Lance Armstrong’s Hardest Conversation Wasn’t With Oprah

Ana Connery — Wed, 16 Jan 2013 17:37:41 +0000

Last week, my son called me a thief.

Spitting Image

Ana Connery — Tue, 15 Jan 2013 15:00:00 +0000

Check out these photos! On the left is me, at 3, with my pop, outside my childhood home in Miami, where my family still lives. My dad died when I was 16, so the bittersweetness of this image is something I cherish. On the right, it's Javier, my first-grader, and me outside our home earlier this year just before we built a porch on our house. The resemblance between the two images is pure coincidence, but it speaks volumes about history's penchant for repeating itself, don't ya think?

Don't Believe the Hyphen

Ana Connery — Fri, 07 Dec 2012 20:16:22 +0000

I’ve been thinking a lot about my name lately, probably because I’m waiting for my boyfriend, Mark, to ask me to marry him. (It’s OK to disclose this, he’s well aware.) When I first married my baby’s daddy, Ed, it took me years to change my name, which drove the traditionalist nuts. When our son, Javier, was born, I still hadn’t done it, and Ed almost blew his top when the hospital put my maiden name on the baby’s hospital bracelet. When I finally, finally got around to doing it, we separated shortly thereafter. (That’ll teach him.)

When Your Kid Asks About Divorce, Say This

Ana Connery — Wed, 28 Nov 2012 22:08:14 +0000

I recently hosted a playdate that had us outside in our courtyard doing crafts with the neighbors. My boyfriend, Mark, was my fabulous co-host. We’ve been dating a year and a half, and he’s becoming a bigger part of our family with each passing day.

While I made monsters with toilet paper tubes and googly eyes, he manned the hot dogs on the grill. As Mark gently served my son, Jav, a plate, his pal, Cullen, turned to him and asked, “Are you Javier’s dad?”

My Son is Obsessed with his Penis

Ana Connery — Fri, 12 Oct 2012 17:27:02 +0000

At first this may not sound like a big deal. Lots of boys (and men, dare I say) are perpetually entertained by this unpredictable and often entertaining body part. But in the post-Sandusky era we live in, a boy’s relationship to his penis has taken on new, even scary, importance.

Recently while at my son’s T-ball practice, another mom came up to me to say she witnessed Javier say this to the coach: “Hey, you touched my penis.”

And Another Thing I’d Rather You Not Do At T-Ball…

Ana Connery — Wed, 10 Oct 2012 20:24:05 +0000

To pee or not to pee (in public)—that is the question. At yet another T-ball practice last week, a young dad took his four-year-old to the nearest bush and dropped his pants so he could pee. His wife was also there, but she stayed back with the other parents watching her older son play ball.

Now, this may not sound like a big deal to you, but it was to me—because the bathroom was within eyesight, a mere 30 or so yards away. Would it have been that hard to walk the little guy to the restroom and let him tinkle privately?

Please Don’t Ever Do This at Your Kid’s T-ball Practice

Ana Connery — Wed, 12 Sep 2012 16:27:04 +0000

Yesterday was my son’s first T-ball practice. I don’t know who was more psyched, Javier or I. Jav is a great kid but an only child and very competitive, hence a team sport sounded like a great idea. I figured he could learn new skills and get some exercise while learning how to be part of a team and win and lose with grace (I hope). Adding to the fun last night was Lola Paloma, our new Doxie-Pin pup, who loved the idea of hanging out at the park on a breezy evening watching her new boy catch his first ground ball.

I loved my doula. Just keep her away from my baby.

Ana Connery — Thu, 30 Aug 2012 20:42:48 +0000

I am the last person you would expect to have a doula. I don’t exactly practice natural parenting. The only thing I consistently buy organic is milk, and when food accidentally drops to the floor, I firmly believe in the two-second rule (OK, five, maybe seven seconds, max). Perhaps even more telling, I have never felt a pain I wasn’t comfortable treating with medication. In short, the only natural thing about me is my hair color. Oh, wait. I recently started coloring that, too.

Why I’m a Total Phony

Ana Connery — Thu, 16 Aug 2012 21:56:43 +0000

I’m a fake, a phony, a Chinatown knock-off. Like a lot of working moms, the scope of my job requires attention well beyond 40 hours per week, but I regularly near-kill myself squeezing it in so I can sprint to karate, a play date, the grocery store, a drive-thru…you get the idea. On the surface, I have it all under control, so it’s no surprise that I’m often asked this question: “Just how do you do it all?” Here’s the answer you’ve all been waiting for, folks (drum-roll, please): I don’t. I really, really don’t. How’s this for a press release?

Boob Patrol

Ana Connery — Tue, 31 Jul 2012 22:34:01 +0000

I was on a flight this morning bound for a strategy meeting in our New York office and just as we were about to land, my fellow passengers and I were subjected to several minutes of intercom marketing. A flight attendant was explaining the benefits of owning said airline’s credit card, which allows for priority boarding, free in-flight wireless access and more. She went on and on for a few minutes, then walked down the aisles holding a brochure for those of us interested in learning more.