The other harder part was to always tell the truth. I did have a major setback in feeling confident about the experiment when, due to a combination of multiple factors, my marriage ended. While it hurt immensely, I eventually decided to resume work on the experiment. I hinted at the experiment in the weeks before it started and discussed it with a couple of my close friends before deciding that come hell or high water on Dec 21st, 2009 I would begin. My twitter account was now ground zero for a whole new type of experiment (years and years ago I lived as a homeless person in Portland, Oregon for 6 weeks because I wanted to see what the actual effects on my own personality would be).

A few people including Pete Grillo, Steven Mcdade and Thomas Brenneke came perilously close to making me ‘out’ the experiment throughout 2010. My one rule to maintain telling the truth while taking an extremist tack was the same as used by Project Alpha: If asked why I was required to tell the person asking. Thanks to a few of you for keeping it secret by the way!

Unsurprisingly the end of the year conclusions came out fairly staid:

• People under the age of 25 are vastly more likely to positively respond to reactionary statements.
• People identifying as monotheists are more likely to unfollow when their ideologies are questioned or insulted than polytheists or atheists.
• People who use their faces as avatars are less likely to deviate from a moderate tone in their tweet stream.
• The amount of unengaged accounts went up at approximately the same ratio as my daily number of tweets. While many of these accounts aren’t necessarily spam it does indicate that neophyte users frequently just follow anyone in the stream who says things that they relate to. Nothing out of the ordinary there really.
• The number of spam accounts did spike rather heavily (up 23% the first week no less) as I began using more hashtags and keyworded phrases.
• One fact I’m quite proud of is that my fellow Portlanders were the group least likely to unfollow me based on my statements. When I looked at the data closer the numbers of “loyal” followers were split fairly evenly between liberal and conservative users. Which led me to conclude that Portland is more about speaking up than it is about partisanship. Not everyone in Portland may agree but they won’t necessarily unfollow you for it.
• At the 6 month mark I ramped up to following a large number of adult performers, strippers and cam girls throughout the world, again surprisingly Portland accounts took offense at a much lower rate than other cities.
• At the 9 month mark I began cycling on a 48 hours rude and 24 hours polite rate which resulted in very little differences to the statistics over time but did cause some upheaval during the switch from one state to the other.

The few really interesting realizations occurred in the way many of my long term friends and some quiet acquaintances changed the way they saw me over that year. Especially interesting was the group of people who publicly said one thing but privately said another. It speaks volumes about how even though we’re told to tell the truth as children, between the age of being a child and being a fully fledged grownup we lose those abilities to always be honest.
Of my personal favorite responses and results were:

• An active social media using tech executive from California regularly sent me a DM whenever I took certain topics to task thanking me for “saying what he would get fired for”.
• A VP of Marketing from a NYC based company sent me an email that read in part “Some of what you say is obviously calculated to get a response but nicely doesn’t come off as blind trolling. It would be nice if honesty of the level you approach was something marketers could capitalize on”.
• A former student from my drumline teaching days called me to ask if I was really that angry at the world and if there was anything they could do to help.

After going through the data and realizing that a lot of what our parents taught us is true, that how you speak affects how well you’re listened to I realize that the greatest lesson wasn’t the specifics of the data. My experiment was never about collating the many into a grand unified theory of sociology, it was about how the circle of friends and acquaintances I have change and adapt over time. Everyday our personalities go through varying degrees of flux. It’s a natural part of being human, what we must all learn to do is be honest to ourselves and to everyone else without remorse. It’s not a real decision if you’re not invested in it.

While I’ve got much of the data aggregated now I’m not able to share the full report at this time. When you blindly involve people in an experiment you don’t have a right to arbitrarily decide how to use their public identity. I’ll try to figure out a way to sanitize it enough to not force many people to have their information shared as part of this. I should add that I also am under an NDA which prevents me from releasing anymore data at this time. I will say thanks to the very cool company that liked the idea and paid me for the researchas well as provided me excellent resources for getting the missing data restored as much as possible. Thanks guys!

I feel enriched and also deeply humbled by the gamut of emotional responses to my words, my deeds and especially the number of new friends I made during the experiment.
To those of you who helped voluntarily or as subjects I say thank you very much.

With a cooking time of just 65-70 minutes this is an easy bread to start right before you cook dinner so you can have a perfect dessert piping hot right when you’re ready for it!
yield makes 6 small loaves or 2 large loaves

Ingredients

• 1 teaspoon baking soda
• 1 teaspoon salt
• 1 teaspoon ground cinnamon
• 1 teaspoon vanilla
• 2 cups sugar
• 4 eggs, beaten
• 1 cup cooking oil
• 2 1/2 cups sliced strawberries
• 3 cups flour
• 1/4 cup buttermilk
• 2 tablespoons powdered sugar
• 1/4 teaspoon nutmeg

Directions
1. Preheat oven to 350F. coat inside of loaf pans with shortening or butter. Set aside.
2. Mix all ingredients except berries together in a mixer until well mixed (2-3 minutes).
3. Lightly toss strawberries in a mixture of flour (2-3 tablespoons), powdered sugar and cinnamon
4. Mix in berries with batter.
5. Place the batter in the prepared pans. Bake 35 to 45 minutes for small loaf pans or about 65 minutes for large loaf pans. Cool 10 to 15 minutes before removing from pan.

Let cool another 15-30 minutes before slicing. Serve with thinly sliced strawberries and butter.For an extra kick of tastiness serve with a scoop of vanilla ice cream.

If you like this recipe let me know!

Growing it out wasn’t too big of an issue until it hit that irritating in-between state where it literally couldn’t be anything than a mass of curly nonsense.

Prepping to get my hair cut.

Other things I’d forgotten about having long hair:

1. My hair is REALLY curly when long. This means tangles.
2. It’s REALLY big when long anytime it gets humid. I live in Portland, Oregon. It rains heavily here, which means “Poof!”
3. People treat you differently if you haven’t shaved on Saturday AND you have long hair.
4. The winter time is nice for keeping your neck warm.
5. I used much more shampoo and conditioner which got expensive.

The bag containing my hair ready to ship to Locks of Love

All in all while a few people gave me grief about it (including one recruiter who hounded me weekly until they saw a picture of me and said “charity shmarity, long hair is unprofessional”) I got many congratulations and compliments for daring to buck the short hair on men business trend.

Going to give it another try in a year or two and hopefully will convince 2-3 others to do it with me. Hell you even get a free haircut at the end if you have Great Clips cut your hair when you go to donate.

There is so much more that can be done but with the excellent Locks of Love organization you can literally just do your normal routine and then after it grows enough; you can help make a small difference in a child’s life!

Instant clean-cut, just simply remove hair

Granted many of you can’t grow your hair for a variety of reasons, there are literally hundreds of

different ways that you can make a difference in the life of someone. Donating blood, old clothes, your time, your expertise all are ways you can do good in your own community!

Happy birthday son! It’s been 3 years since I first got to hold you and all of those beautiful moments in between as you’ve grown, learned and developed into one of the most awesome people I know.

I’m so proud of you and of how big you’ve gotten. I’ll be coming up to see you next week and am so excited to give you your birthday gifts and take you shopping for cool stuff! I can’t wait to see you!

I’m sorry I’m not able to be there with you this birthday but I hope you enjoyed the cupcakes I sent you. You are a little champ and I miss seeing your face and experiencing that side scoot lap sneak attack you learned shortly after you first learned to walk. There are so many moments and incredibly cool things you do and I love all of them. You’re my son and I love you very much!

You’re 3 now and I love you and am always thinking about you and your brother too!

Love you son,

Daddy

Dear Senator Boehner,

You ran on a platform of “Where are the jobs” promising to make sure American’s get back to work. You had a plan to do so, you said. You won, and now we’re all still waiting to see your plan to get people working again, only you still haven’t shared it. You don’t seem to have one. It’s strange, I was raised to believe if you knew how to help people you did it freely and with joy because “it’s the Christian thing to do” or as many Americans are taught in Sunday school “sharing is caring”. I don’t know how you were raised but I was always taught and believe even today that people are more important than money. Somehow the Republican party seems to have forgotten that.

Please explain why with the Bush tax cuts in effect since 2003 we’re still losing jobs and have been for months. Please explain how cutting the size of government will increase employment, it seems to me that will in fact add more to the rolls of the unemployed. Please explain the mathematical formula you used to calculate that the democrats are at fault for a recession that started 3 years before they took back the senate and house. The blame game really doesn’t work anymore now that we’re in a world where things like wikileaks, anonymous and others dedicated to a free transparent open government expect. The historical record has a habit of not being kind to people who cheat and push responsibility elsewhere. Do you want that to be your footnote in the history books? Stand up for what’s right and be a beacon of hope instead of delivering more fear and blame.

I understand party affiliation, I understand fighting for what you believe in. But how can you say that giving the extremely wealthy a tax cut while millions of Americans can’t get a job is a good idea? If more Americans are out of work they stop buying retail goods, they stop paying utilities which in turn causes those companies to let employees go which compounds the problem. The evidence of that is in front of you yet for some reason your party sides with the wealthy every time. That’s your right as a free American to choose to side with the wealthy, but wouldn’t that also compel you to stop using the conservative base that straddle the poverty line to get elected? If you want to represent the wealthy don’t do it in government, do it in the private sector because in government you’re only hurting all Americans to enrich a very few.

Please if you care about this country and all it’s myriad people you’ll stop putting the wealthy before ALL Americans.

TSA

to the tune of the Village People’s YMCA

Young man, there’s no need to feel down.
I said, young man, pick yourself off the ground.
I said, young man, ’cause you’re flying to town
There’s no need to be unhappy.

Young man, there’s a place you can go.
I said, young man, when you’ need to feel aglow.
You can stand there, and I’m sure you will find
Many ways to have a good time.

It’s fun to get groped by the T-S-A.
It’s fun to get groped by the T-S-A.

They’ll grab everything that you need to enjoy,
You can hang out with all the TSA boys …

It’s fun to get groped by the T-S-A.
It’s fun to get groped by the T-S-A.

You can get yourself xrayed, you can have a good meal
You can do whatever if you just let them feel …

Young man, are you listening to me?
I said, young man, what do you want it to be?
I said, young man, you can make real your dreams.
But you’ve got to choose this TSA groping!

No man does it all by himself.
I said, young man, put your keys on the shelf,
And just go get groped by the T.S.A.
I’m sure they will grope you today.

It’s fun to get groped by the T-S-A.
It’s fun to get groped by the T-S-A..

They’ll grab everything that you need to enjoy,
You can groped by all the TSA boys …

It’s fun to get groped by the T-S-A.
It’s fun to get groped by the T-S-A.

You can get yourself xrayed, you can have a good meal,
Just so long as you let them feel …

Young man, I said take off your shoes.
I said, you look like you got the terrorist blues.
I felt him check if my bottom was tight.
I felt the whole world was so leaning right …

That’s when someone came up to me,
And said, young man, take a walk to your gate.
There’s a  place before there called the T.S.A.
Why not get hired since groping’s your way?

It’s fun to get groped by the T-S-A.
It’s fun to get groped by the T-S-A.

They have everything that you need to enjoy,
You can hang out with all the boys …

T-S-A

It’s fun to stay at the T-S-A
Young man, young man there’s no need to feel down
Young man, young man take yourself to the T.S.A. ground

T-S-A

then just go to the T-S-A
young man, young man I was once in your shoes
young man, young man I said, I was down and out with the flying blues.
T-S-A.”

You know, I like flying. I really do. What I don’t like though is a system that hearkens back to the first time I played Half Life 2. We’re a free country so why do I have to stand in a line to be sexually assaulted or get inundated with xrays that even airlines are telling pilots not to use? Yeah the people who fly our planes are told to get sexually assaulted rather than get xrayed. That should tell you something. Our government officials heading up the TSA think that sexual assault is not a big deal for travelers.

I am pleased to note that you’re bringing your Star Wars franchise to Blu-Ray, really I am. I just really think the whole “Han shot second” crap undermines the story (him coming back to help Luke loses all meaning if he’s not established as a douche).

Since you started on the prequels, you’ve forgotten the story and only added special effects (which, contrary to your opinions, don’t actually improve movies). I think I heard you say at least once “it’s the story stupid”, though that might have been your talented, good friend Steven Spielberg. Who, speaking of him, really should have had you beaten repeatedly for the abomination that was the last Indiana Jones movie.

What you’re doing to the Star Wars universe is worse than anything a Sith lord could ever do to it. Just stop screwing up beauty,and count your piles of cash or something. The fact that you’re incapable of figuring out that you’ve become an awful director (in spite of those previously mentioned piles of cash usable to hire competent people) worries me greatly since it’s been 4 years almost since you announced a Star Wars tv show. The fact that you’re helming it makes me think it’s quite possible that finally you’ll top the Christmas special and release something so terrible that it is quickly outlawed for being toxic and a crime against humanity (yes I in fact mean something worse than “Tremors” the tv show).

If you truly care about your characters and want Star Wars to continue to be a popular beloved franchise, stop mucking it up already! The South Park guys hit the nail on the head: you’re sick, you need help, and all you’re doing is slapping a coat of new, cheap paint over the original masterpiece.

Sincerely,

A lifelong Star Wars fan (in spite of what you’ve done to the series).

We had eight years of
Bush and Cheney, but now you get mad!
You didn’t get mad when
the Supreme Court stopped a legal recount and appointed a
President.

You didn’t get mad when Cheney allowed Energy company officials to dictate energy policy.You didn’t get mad when a covert CIA operative got ousted.

You didn’t get mad when
the Patriot Act got passed..

You didn’t get mad when
we illegally invaded a country that posed no threat to us.

You didn’t get mad when
we spent over 600 billion(and counting) on said illegal war.

You didn’t get mad when
over 10 billion dollars just disappeared in Iraq.

You didn’t get mad when
you found out we were torturing people.

You didn’t get mad when
the government was illegally wiretapping Americans.

You didn’t get mad when
we didn’t catch Bin Laden.

You didn’t get mad when
you saw the horrible conditions at Walter Reed.

You didn’t get mad when
we let a major US city drown.

You didn’t get mad when
we gave a 900 billion tax break to the rich.

You didn’t get mad when, using reconciliation; a trillion dollars of our tax dollars were redirected to insurance companies for Medicare Advantage which cost over 20 percent more for basically the same services that Medicare provides.

You didn’t get mad when
the deficit hit the trillion dollar mark, and our debt hit the thirteen trillion dollar mark.

You finally got mad
when the government decided that people in America deserved the right to see a doctor if they are sick. Yes, illegal wars, lies, corruption, torture, stealing your tax dollars to make the rich richer, are all okay with you, but helping other Americans… oh hell no.

AND NOW YOU’RE MAD?!

When you can actually act like grownups instead of screaming harpies that just protest without offering a balanced opinion then and only then will you be worthy of hearing out. Until then though you’re just more cacophony hindering progress towards a sustainable profitable tomorrow.

What’s really interesting is realizing more and more that in order for me to be truly happy I need to embrace the person I was from age 19-22 much, much more.  I lived life in many ways like a hippy or beatnik. I worked when I needed money, I slept if I needed to but above all I never compromised my own values or ethics while at the same time keeping to my promise to always be equally mutually beneficial to any interactions I had. I forgot that along the way and that imbalance contributed to a lot of hurt to a lot of people who didn’t deserve it including myself. The adage “be true to yourself” means accepting the flaws inherent to who you are too.

I’m by no means glossing over my own immaturities throughout my life but there is a certain raw natural instinct that guides us at that age before the outside world forces us to change to be a better fit in society. The real question then is how useful is society if it requires that we not be ourselves (obvious nonharmful to others qualifier). So much of our society is about making a better you with stuff and lesser so on excelling on being ourselves.Why can’t we instead work towards promoting a better species instead of just being a vast network of interdependent snake oil salesmen.

So who is this new me? Or rather what is the “me” that has returned? That’s really an observational thing so find me somewhere at any of my favorite Portland haunts and see for yourself :D

Mine are currently:

1. All Along the Watchtower by Jimi Hendrix: That song originally a tune by Bob Dylan is completely and totally owned by Hendrix (he plays almost every guitar part in the song). Great taken to the level of perfection. This coupled with the fact the lyrics always really resonated with me (and slightly reminds me of Stephen King’s Dark Tower somehow).

2. White Rabbit by Jefferson Airplane: A fantastic melodic & percussive rhythm perfectly crafted to hit you like a one, two punch of awesome in perfect compliment to Grace Slick’s perfect delivery and the impact her amazing voice has.

3. If I ever leave this world alive by Flogging Molly: This song didn’t make much sense to me personally until I fell in love and became a parent. So melancholy yet at the same time so hopeful and optimistic, the song has become even more something I find myself humming or singing in the shower or while puttering around handling errands.

4. Someone by Ascension: One of the best dance tracks ever recorded and brilliantly mixed by Paul Oakenfold this song has great music but above all the simple statements in the lyrics (very simple) have tremendous impact. When writing my marriage vows this song, this simple little song inspired me because it was one of “our” songs and the lyrics were and still to my heart are exactly true of how I feel about her.

5. Baker Street by Gerry Rafferty: One of the earliest songs I remember hearing and also responsible for the huge popularity of the saxophone throughout the early ’80s. The bittersweet quality of the lyrics always tend to really hit me the most right when I need them to.

So that’s my list and as always to participate all you need to do is comment. The let me know and I’ll post a link back to your blog the same way I did for the first experiment.