I think we can blame Facebook for this one, but it’s spawned well beyond the realms of that bubonic plague of a website.  The “tell me you like this” plea is everywhere, and I have no idea what I am supposed to do with it.  The words do not mean what they would otherwise seem to mean.  In the case of Stumbleupon, especially, a “like” will alter my future stumbling experience, it will also ensure that a site shows up on my “liked” list for anyone to see.  But whether I actually Liked it or not (as an emotional response, you understand) is only one tiny part of the equation.  What would Amy Vanderbilt do? *

So, can anyone answer me this question:

It’s late at night, you’ve had a few whiskeys, and you’re hitting Stumble.  As you do.  You find a site that’s so damned wrong that you want everyone else you know to know how wrong it is…do you say “I like it”, just so you can point it out to your friends/associates/random people you only sort of know, with the full realization that you’re saying you like something you actually hate?

Or how ’bout this one:

You find a website that makes you laugh, but you know that you are a bad, bad person for laughing.  Do you “like” that?

“Liking” things is a complicated process these days, much like “friending” someone used to be (I solved that by not friending anyone, anymore…it’s confusing enough to decide what “friends” are in real life, I can’t be bothered with Internet definitions).  What you “like” becomes associated with you forever, and there’s no way of setting parameters around how and why you “liked” something, or what that “I like it” actually meant.  We need more subtle definitions.

May I propose a few clarifying alternatives:

I don’t really like this, but I want other people to see it to see how much I don’t like it.

I feel guilty for laughing at this, so understand I know I’m an asshole.

Someone I like sent me this, so I’d feel bad if I didn’t at least acknowledge the friendship by saying “I like it”, too.

I actually like this a lot, but I feel cheesy for liking it, so understand I like it with irony attached.

I probably won’t like this tomorrow, but tonight I’m too drunk/tired/high on life to be discerning.

I’m only liking this so I can find it later (and I can’t be bothered organizing my fifty thousand bookmarks, so I’d never find it there).

In comparison to the last fifteen things I just saw on the internet, this suddenly seems pretty damned good.

All I’m saying is “thumbs up” / “thumbs down” is not the height of human expression.  Maybe we need a little more subtlety.

*Note: It may seem weird that I’m bringing A.V. into this.  If so, you were clearly not the kind of kid who realized at the cusp of puberty that you apparently did not get the “social nuances” of those around you and felt the need to consult an expert on how to get along in the world.  I read that book cover to cover three times.  I know what a shrimp fork looks like and where you put it on the table.   I still don’t know what to say at dinner, though.

copyright 2010 mogmismo, used with permission.

I just received a forwarded email (copied in the first comment) from a representative of Conservative America, offering terms of settlement for divorce.  As it came to me, I reckon I am a fit delegate to respond to the offer.  My response is as follows:

Dear American Conservatives, righties, social retardists, despots, fascists, and Palin supporters, et al:

I have to say I was relieved to receive your email.  As you say, we have stuck together for years for the children, but given the obvious fact that the children are growing up and are able to make their own life choices, it’s clearly time we ended the game.  I’m in complete agreement that it’s far past time we stopped pretending to be on the same side, and I’m glad that for once you appear to be willing to talk on the level and come to a reasonable agreement.

I appreciate the fact that you clearly understand me well enough to offer some terms you feel I can not only accept, but even be happy with.  However, if this split is truly to happen on equitable terms, I have to clarify a few points.  I’m sure you will find my requests not only reasonable, but every bit as understanding and acceptable as those you have offered me.

Clearly, the dividing of assets is a necessary, but uncomfortable, part of any separation.  When it comes to actual landmass I can see that the argument could devolve to pettiness, but I think we can both be mature enough to realize that in actual fact, we rarely want the same things.  So I’ll take California, Connecticut, Iowa, Massachusetts, New Hampshire, Vermont, Washington D.C., New York, Rhode Island, and Maryland…the states where same sex marriage is at least recognized (yes, I remember Proposition 8, but we both know it isn’t going to last (edit: told you).  I’ll also take Colorado, Minnesota, New Jersey, New Mexico, Oregon, and Pennsylvania, as along with California, Connecticut, Massachusetts, and Maryland, they are the top solar producers.  I’d also like Texas, Kansas, Nebraska, South Dakota, Montana, North Dakota, and Iowa, as they are the top wind power producers in the country.  It only seems fair, since you are generously gifting me the alternative energy and hoping that fossil fuels are going to work out for you.  That’s 23 states, and to even it out completely, I think I should have Washington state and Oregon, as everyone knows they like me more than you.  Oh, and I’m going to have to ask for western North Carolina, or at least Asheville, as I live there and everyone I know in town pretty much hates you.

I’m going to be honest, here, and admit that I know Texas will be a bit of a wrench for you.  But, considering the Gulf War (which I know you intend to continue) and all the oil you can siphon out of the area around the BP oil spill, I’m sure you can see that it’s really a fair split.

Once that’s settled (and I think you can hardly disagree with my logic, so that should be simple), we can move on to dividing up the rest of our assets.

I’m happy to keep the redistributive taxes, though I hardly think we’ll need them once you’re gone.  I do understand that you will be taking at least 80% of the wealth in the nation with you, but I don’t think we’ll miss it.  After all, once you’re gone we can cure cancer and other congenital diseases, as well as make major advances in alternative energy, space exploration, and other sciences, so taking a long range view I’m figuring we’ll do OK.  Just as a side note, I think I should get to keep The Internet.  I know it was your kids who started it, but you have to admit it’s been our baby for a long time, and if you really had any invested interest in it Wikipedia and Opensecrets.org wouldn’t exist.  After all, it’s just a bunch of perverts and conspiracy theorists, why would you want it, anyway?

I’m happy to take the liberal judges and the ACLU, you can have the KKK, the white supremacists, the Christian fundamentalists, and Wall Street.  You can have your guns and war, but you must also take every single person who has ever participated at a Tough Man contest, the professional wrestlers, and Nascar.  All of it.  You also can keep Newt Gingrich, Sarah Palin, and Mel Gibson.  Quite honestly, I have no idea how you’re going to afford their medical bills, as I anticipate that drugs will be rather expensive over there, but I guess that’s really your problem, isn’t it?

Happy for you to have the pharmaceutical companies and Wal-Mart, we’ll take the public universities, NPR, and alternative press.  By all means keep the Alaskan hockey moms and greedy CEO’s, and you can have the rednecks but the country folk are ours.  Actually, I think we can make this even simpler: we keep art, education, and research, and you can keep religion and the military industrial complex.  I know we’ve always disagreed about the importance of these things, so you take yours and I’ll take mine and let the best man win.

Happy to take peace with Iran and Palestine, and you go ahead and fight them until you’re blue in the face.  Not stepping in to save your economy, though, you’ll have to go a little more in hock to China for that.  Speaking of which, you take the debts.  It was your missile habit that got us there in the first place, I don’t think I should have to pay for it.

In exchange, I’ll take on the U.N. bill, but if I’m paying for it that means I get the seat on the Security Council.  You can take as many “Judeo-Christian values” as you can muster, but I get the ones who want to turn the other cheek.  I’ll take the rest of the religions, though, as well as those who don’t espouse one.  It’s that Freedom of Religion thing that I always wanted to try.  You remember the one.

By all means take the gas guzzlers.  But in exchange, I get Detroit.  You screwed the pooch on that one, and I hear some folks there have some pretty interesting ideas that I’d like to support.

As to music, you can have “The Battle Hymn of the Republic” and “The National Anthem” (it’s called “The Star Spangled Banner”, by the way, but no one can sing it, anyway).  We’ll take all The Beatles, as well as punk rock, the blues, most rock and roll, and The Dixie Chicks.  You can have pop.

You can have the part of our history which you directed.  The loyalists during the Revolutionary War, every avowedly conservative President, McCarthyism, Japanese Internment, racism, sexism, etc.  We’ll keep the progressive bits, and I’m sorry to tell you that will include the Founding Fathers.

As to the flag, I propose a compromise:
 
You can keep the stripes, and we’ll hang on to the stars.

Sincerely,

Celestina Adams

Profligate and Heretic

Fuckin' Boom. Photo by Mogmismo.

In the last few days, there has been a rash of reports commenting on the Republican Party’s apparent embrace of violent terminology. You can read about it lots of places, but in case you somehow missed it, here’s an example.

So there appears to be a trend, not necessarily amongst all Republicans (I still like to dream that there are a few fiscal conservatives cowering beneath the onslaught of Moral Imperatives Activists and Obama Is A Fascist lunatics), but certainly amongst some of their most prominent and loud-mouthed representatives. And the contingent of the blogosphere which likes to think of itself as Sensibly Liberal has made the predictable response: they’ve gone into mama-next-door mode and begun worrying about the future of the neighborhood. They’re concerned, and perhaps rightfully so, that one of these days some teabagger out there somewhere is going to stop throwing bricks through windows and pick up a gun.

That could happen. Certainly, there are enough fanatical lunatics out of our 308,956,488 or so people that one or more of them are statistically likely to tumble over the edge any minute. But what I find curious is that no one seems to be asking the obvious question: what does the GOP stand to gain by not condemning language which seems formulated to encourage violent responses?

Let’s assume that most high-level Republicans actually do not want to see President Obama or any Democratic political representative killed. This assumption has nothing to do with their moral character, their moral character is irrelevant. What is relevant is the likelihood that assassinating a high-level Democratic leader would backfire. The Democrats would, of course, be justifiably outraged. The Independents are likely to suddenly decide that maybe one party actually is more apeshit than the other. And don’t forget that quiet little segment of the Republicans, the one that’s wondering how the hell their party got hijacked by these fundamentalists and is just trying to hang in there until the Universe rights itself. They might just decide to get the hell out and start a party that actually represents their interests.

So if the GOP doesn’t actually want people killed, what are they doing?

They’re playing on basic psychology. For years, they have painted the Democrats as pussies. Little, bleeding heart liberals that want to give milk and cookies to the terrorists. Mama’s boys who want to take away their guns because they’re scared they might get hurt. The Republicans, on the other hand, are stalwart pioneers, holding fast to the values that made this country great, and not taking shit off anyone. Basically, they’re engaging primitive tribal impulses by saying “Stick with us, kid. We’re strong, we’re survivors. That other tribe is going to fall into cannibalism any day now, just you watch.”

Democrats have never been good at playing this game. They take umbrage and try to argue that they never said any such thing, that they just want to make the world a better place, blah blah blah. They don’t address the gut fears that the Republicans like to play upon, they just try to make reasonable arguments about why the fears are counterproductive. They apologize when they are insulted. It’s weird, but beyond that it plays right into the GOP’s tactics. Because nobody wants to be on the losing side.

Having lost in the last national election, the Republicans had to do something to shore up confidence in their tribe or risk losing members. So they brought out the tea party notion, completely misappropriated and bastardized, but it didn’t matter…the tribe had something to believe in. Note well…they didn’t have to think about it, they just had to believe. And that got them through that tricky first year after losing control of the government. But then, after a long, seemingly losing battle, the Democrats pulled out a so-called “victory” with health care “reform”. Whatever you may think of the bill, the Republicans had drawn a line in the sand and this was just not supposed to happen. So what to do? Ratchet up the rhetoric. Remind the constituents that they are the strong ones, they are the ones not afraid to “go out and fight”. Whatever may have happened, it’s still our strong tribe against those pussy Democrats, and you know we can always take them if we want to. Hell, those sons of bitches don’t even own guns, do they?

It’s a pity the Democrats were scared to say “you know, there’s really no reason you need to bring a gun to a political rally.” It’s too bad they couldn’t bring themselves to set up a “Fun With Waterboarding Day” on the White House lawn, so that anyone who wanted to could try it, and then indicate whether or not they thought the U.S. Government should be using it as a form of interrogation. It’s rather sad they couldn’t bring themselves to say “Seriously? You’re listening to that fucking idiot?” after Sarah Palin “informed” the nation that health care reform would mean “Death Panels” which would kill their grandparents. I suppose they’re not likely to respond to the current rash of death threats with “Only scaredy cats go around waving their gun in the air. Don’t you have a tea party to get to?” But it sure would be nice, just for a change of pace.

On the other hand, maybe the Dems are out-strategizing the GOP. If the Republicans don’t reign in their dogs soon, one of them really is likely to take a shot. When that happens, the Democrats can finally rest assured of another six years in office.

Children have no sense of wonder. As a culture, we like to pretend that they do, we like to paint portraits of them wide-eyed and awestruck…but the simple truth is that kids are rarely awestruck by anything, because they have not yet formed opinions about the operational parameters of the world they experience. Everything is normal, everything is beyond their comprehension, therefore nothing is particularly amazing (or arguably, everything is, though they don’t typically seem particularly amazed).

As adults, we crave a return to that sense that anything is possible, as over the years we slowly box ourselves in to more and more limited systems of belief, a process which we call “learning from experience”, though in fact real learning has very little to do with it. We experience facets of life, and attempt to generalize from these (usually in an attempt to avoid discomfort in the future). We call the generalizations “understanding”, but in actuality it is a slowly crystallizing structure of beliefs. And eventually our beliefs trap us. We are hemmed in by our own boundaries, and we long for the days when we could breathe freely, delighting in the possibility that literally anything could happen.

Those moments when we glimpse that nearly forgotten realm of possibility inspire what we adults call “wonder”.

After our first taste, wonder is an addictive sensation, though most people never realize what it is they are craving. They substitute the weaker experience of surprise, which while perfectly fine for what it is, will never begin to approach the complete, if momentary, freedom that is wonder. The open night sky, the bizarre implications of quantum physics, those moments when we witness something which perfectly embodies love, truth, or beauty…these things will always carry a deeper sense of satisfaction than the most surprising surprise party in the world.

Is it possible to reach a point where we completely regain our sense of boundlessness? Can we develop a permanent sense of wonder, within which we combine wisdom based on experience with the knowledge that our experience is a doorway rather than a boundary line?

Is that, perhaps, what growing up was always meant to be?

giant puppets are pretty wonderful

Dear MoveOn,

A year and a half ago, you asked me to choose which Presidential candidate MoveOn, as an organization representative of my beliefs, should support and promote. I chose Barack Obama, as did many other MoveOn members. So many, in fact, that he received your endorsement for the Presidency; support which undoubtedly had a significant influence on the election results of 2008. Barack Obama is now President, thanks to our hard work.

And the country has yet to see the Change and Hope upon which he based his platform.

This is all the more disturbing considering the Democratic majority in Congress. Now that they have a so-called “super majority“, one would think that meaningful reform would be ushered immediately and gracefully onto the floor. But this has not happened, and according to any intelligent reading of the reports from Congress, it’s not about to happen. Despite their ability to enact real change which would have a significant impact on the American people…Congress is not inclined. It’s easy to say compromise is important, but when you have offered extensive compromise and your opponent says “Not good enough!”, it is time to walk away and carve a path on your own. Democrats do not need to compromise to enact health care reform, alternative energy research, net neutrality, or any other goal they strive to achieve…all they have to do is vote for it. Their reluctance to do so speaks volumes about their loyalties and their fears.

It is understandable, given the results of the last Democratic attempt to implement health care reform(1), that they would be cautious now. Recent polls(2), however, make it clear that the majority of American people want universal health care. It is traditional to try to ease in change, rather than rush it forward before a majority of the people understand the necessity. Immediate and goal-oriented action, however, is required if the United States is not only to survive, but to prosper, during the coming energy crisis. A belief in the efficacy of “trickle down” economics(3) has driven most Americans into debt and dishonor(4), and the very idea that Internet providers have a right to choose the future of ideas based on ability to pay is a demonstration of where such backward thinking has brought us. Congress can change the future, any time they wish. They just choose not to.

I am writing to you, then, MoveOn, to ask you to do what you do best: tell people their hopes and dreams are on the line, and it is up to them to make sure their elected representatives actually represent. If we want universal health care, we are going to have to demand it, louder than all the corporate interests and “Socialism Sucks!” naysayers who are making them wonder about the longevity of their appointment. If they supported the bill which makes the difference between life and death for the children of hard working, low income American families…they will be reelected, with or without the help of the insurance and pharmaceutical industries. If we want clean energy and energy independence, we are going to have to write them, call them, show up at their offices with statements, arguments, and petitions until they realize that voting for funding which leads to less pollution, more financial security, and higher employment rates will get them reelected even without the support of fossil fuel dependent corporations which are desperately trying to cling to the pipe dreams of their youth. We can insist upon Net Neutrality, so that the Internet remains a place where every idea has a chance of being heard. For that matter, we can go further and ensure equal rights for homosexuals, abolish no-victim crimes, and end a few unnecessary military engagements. We can release some innocent men from Guantanamo, ditch the Patriot Act, and make sure that no President can ever, ever again take such unwarranted liberties with our Constitution as the last one did(5). Just this once, we don’t have to compromise. We can make change happen.

And we must, because time is disappearing beneath us. If the current administration, the current Congress, continue to do nothing for the next year, we will lose the power to enact the changes we so desperately need. The Democratic majority will be lost in the next mid-term election, the Presidency two years after that. While action may risk failure, inaction guarantees it.

So please, use your influence, your ability to pull people together, to remind us all that our work is not even half done. We have one good chance, right now, to change our lives for the better. Please don’t let it slip away.

Thank You,

Celestina Adams

Notes:
(1) Yes, I just referenced Wikipedia. Because it’s often accurate. And when it’s not, it is at least more amusing than Fox News.

(2) Just gotta mention this part While seventy three percent of Democrats favor a tax increase to fund coverage, only twenty-nine percent of Republicans back such a move. Seriously, guys, this makes you look like a bunch of assholes. I know you probably have your reasons…but you probably need someone saner than Glen Beck to try to vouch for you at this point.

(3) One of the weirdest things that has happened in my lifetime is the idolization of Reagan. I know this is likely to get me crucified, but seriously people…he was a pathetic actor, and his Presidential highlights were largely based around watching Nancy throw her voice to cover his increasingly slurred/sugar-high gibberings. He was never, ever a “great” President. Get over it.

(4) New Appalachian farewell blessing: “May the wind be always at your back, and the repo man always under your heel…”

(5) Want to argue that point? Be my guest…

photo by mogmismo

Once upon a time, The Husband and I sat on a grassy hill in summer, looking out over miles of forest and fields, holding hands and talking about…politics. We were specifically discussing the American plans (at that time they were only plans) to build a big ol’ fence to keep the Mexicans out. The concept, to both of us, was patently idiotic. Whatever your take on Hispanic immigrants in the ‘States, it is easily apparent that building a chain link fence isn’t going to do much but piss them off. So after a few moments’ rant, we began discussing other walls throughout history. The Great Wall of China, the Berlin Wall, Hadrian’s Wall…and how they were all failed attempts at protection and, ultimately, separation of people who weren’t really that different. We talked about all the many ways that people try to draw lines, create Others, and the animal instinct to seek security through being part of a pack. We talked about a lot of things, but somewhere in the discussion we came up with an Idea. The Husband is a photographer, and I have a certain fondness for writing. The Idea was that we could travel the world, visiting all these walls (both ancient and modern), researching their history and talking to the people who lived around them. The Husband could photograph these walls and these people, and I could write about their stories. At the end of it all, we would make a book, and who knows? Perhaps people would read the book and some of them would decide that walls weren’t the solution. Perhaps some of them would even start to look for other ways to approach the difficulties we all face.

Unfortunately, we were broke (as we usually are), and so the idea got put on the shelf along with many other dreams that would be nice, some day…

The other part of the frame for my story takes place a couple of years later, just a few months ago. I was sitting in a coffee shop, chatting online with some dear friends in Australia. The topic was what you would really do, if you could live your life any way you want. And they weren’t quite sure at the time, but I had some definite notions. I wanted to write and to travel. I wanted a lot of things, actually, but at the center of it all was that. And from that conversation came the idea that, if only we could all figure out what we really wanted, we could be allies in helping every one of us to get there.

And then, one day about a week ago, I came home to discover that while I was gone The Husband had signed up for a contest. It’s a photography contest, wherein a $50,000 prize will be given to one person to go do the photography shoot of their dreams. And the idea he entered was…The Idea. The problem was that, to even get to the final round of judging, you had to be in the top 20 “popular” votes, meaning roughly that you had to have a hell of a lot of people show up on the site and vote your project up. And so I emailed a few people, and we went up a few points…and the other top contenders climbed higher and higher. And so I went through my address book again, adding a few more. And again we went up a few more votes, while others climbed steadily higher. Finally I just started emailing everyone I could think of, spammed my Facebook friend’s list, started begging my Mom to send it on to all those people she sends forwards of cutesy animals with their heads in the toilet. And we’re still barely hanging on to 20th place…but I started to realize something. These people, some of whom I hadn’t even spoken to in a year, were turning out to do a little bit to help. Some of them were doing even more, sending our plea on to all their friends, writing articles, helping to film a promotional video for Youtube… and for about the millionth time in my life, I found myself thoroughly humbled.

See, a few minutes to show up on a website and vote doesn’t actually cost any one person a lot, but no one has to do it. And it’s easy not to. There have been many, many times where I got some sort of “please take just a minute to…” email in my inbox, and dismissed it without even really reading it. I’m sitting here now, though, realizing that for whatever reason, a truly amazing number of people looked at my email and decided to lend a hand. It was ten minutes (I said in my email it would be five, but one respondent corrected me) to them…and each one left me feeling truly grateful, just a little closer to something I so desperately wanted. And I thought back to my conversation with my friends in Australia, and I realized this doesn’t have to be a pact among just a few people. We can, each one of us, pick something we really, really want, and then all help each other try to get there.

Today I spoke with a friend online to whom I haven’t really talked in a while. He was having a bad day. Not the end of the world, but with some real problems and no idea how to fix them. As we talked, I realized that there was something I could do, something that would get him a little closer to what he Really Wants To Do. So I just said I would. It’s as simple as that. We can all do whatever is in front of us, whatever is in our power, every chance we get, and know that maybe we are all helping each other get somewhere. It doesn’t have to be every man for himself. It doesn’t have to be sink or swim. We can all of us give whatever we can in any moment to help everyone else we care about get just a little closer to the life they really want. We can all be allies, well before all those walls come down. All it takes is just a little more.

So what I really wanted to say is thanks. To every person who took five ten minutes and tried to help me get a little closer to what I Really Want To Do, thank you. Whether or not we win this contest, you, bit by bit, gave me something more. I hope that when you see your chance you will let me know how I can help. Because you reminded me about what is really important…and you somehow gave me something to write about.

And…ok, yeah. I’m not so altruistic as to not add a plea here for my own cause. If you want to help The Husband and I be able to write our book, please go to our site and follow the instructions to cast your vote. It means a lot to me, and every single vote and comment creates a wave of excitement in our house that I wish you could see.

Nevertheless, here is one more to consider. Recently, the Duchess of York went with a reporter to investigate orphanages in Turkey. The situation they found was appalling, beyond anything we can even imagine accepting in the United States. Kids tied, boxed, ignored. Adults who never get to leave and thus spend their lives tied to the furniture. Infants tearing off their own ears to escape the pain caused by neglectful practices. There’s a documentary about the trip coming out on Thursday, but more importantly Fergie is trying to raise money to help build better institutions in Turkey and elsewhere. No one would willingly choose to warehouse children in this manner, but a lack of funding enforces a standard of apathy.

If you can help, please do, whether it is through making donations or simply continuing to spread the world. No matter what country we claim as home, all the children of this world have to grow up together. The least we can do is work to give them a chance at a real life.

Thanks to Robin over at Vabolium.com for being the first to bring my attention to this issue.

Yesterday I found myself explaining a curious thing to my son. He was wondering why H.P. Lovecraft wasn’t the most famous horror-writer ever, and I explained that he was a little too “out there” to ever garner a larger readership, until recently (admittedly, I suspect his readership is still not huge, but it’s growing). My son asked me why more people were reading him now. And so I told the tale of How Geeks Took Over The World.

Long ago, I told my son, when I was growing up, Geeks were forced to desperately cling to the lowest rung of the social strata.  “Really?” my son asked, horror showing plainly on his face.   Yes my love, I told him, it was a very hard time to be a Geek.  And I reminded him of several nightmarish episodes from my youth.  I then proceeded to explain to him how we took over.  How, with the advent of the Internet and computer games, suddenly we were the ones holding the keys to the kingdom.  You see, I continued, no one but the Geeks had ever bothered to learn how to write computer programs or play with hardware.  And so they found themselves coming to Us.

After that, I went on, it wasn’t long before it was “cool” to be a Geek.  And then the ex-jocks and cheerleaders and prom queens and kings and all their minions traded in their jerseys for some plaid, button-up shirts and Chucks and started talking about sci-fi and roleplaying games and comic books and physics.  And some of them even started reading H.P. Lovecraft.

My little son’s faced glowed as he gazed adoringly upon the mother who had fought so hard to bring the world to what it is today (or at least, I like to remember it that way).  But then his little brow crinkled, and he asked in a worried voice,” But Mommy, how do we tell the Real Geeks from the Fake Geeks, now?”

Simple, I replied.  Real Geeks would never use Internet Explorer.

And that, my dear readers, is what I have come to you to say today.  Please, please, for the love of all that is holy, do not use Internet Explorer.  It’s not cool.  The Real Geeks laugh at you behind your back for using it, when they are not cursing you for making their day jobs as programmers ten thousand times more difficult.

If browsers were cars, IE would be a moped.  If browsers were wine, IE would be Night Train.  If browsers were hot dates, IE has herpes.  If browsers were…well, you get the idea.

So there’s the tip of the day from one who knows.  If you want to be one of the “in-crowd”, ditch that lousy-ass browser.  You’ll be glad you did, and so will we.

1) How come it’s crazy when Middle Eastern religions say women have to cover up, but it’s OK when we do it here? It’s because it’s different bits, isn’t it?
2) How come Western culture is so sexually promiscuous, and yet a nipple is still headlining news?
3) How come anyone still cares about Britney Spears? [Note: you must follow above pattern of searches to understand this question]
4)Why does a search for men in burkhas turn up mostly naked women?

Perhaps they are not deep questions, but I sort of think they are.