Chalk Farm

Right Bank Babies….

Jennifer — Sat, 04 Feb 2012 00:45:48 +0000

Like most Mommies, I’m always looking for beautiful, adorable things for my little one to wear. When I started shopping for a few lines to carry, I did a lot of research. How could a company with the name Right Bank Babies, not catch my eye! Created by Los Angeles mommy Ellen Uzarowicz, Ellen started by making dresses for her own daughters. After constantly being stopped on the street and asked where she bought them, she launched her company which is run by a group of women in the LA area and of course, the Right Bank is a reference to Paris, where she met her husband while receiving her MBA. I’m in love with the colors and the unique patterns. Please note your size request on the order page in the “notes” section. I’m still trying to figure out my online store’s computer program!

Aren’t they just lovely?

Available in the BABY section in the Chalk Farm Home online store.

Have a wonderful week!

x Jennifer

Cancer is a lonely business…

Jennifer — Mon, 30 Jan 2012 08:36:55 +0000

It goes without saying that having cancer isn’t any fun. If you’re “lucky,” you get the kind of cancer where you get chemotherapy and radiation and then you get to be “done.”
You know, the kind of treatment where people get to pat you on the back and say “Hey! You made it! You did it! You got through it!”
And then, there’s stage 4 cancer.
Stage 4 cancer is the incurable kind. It’s the kind where they tell you you might not make it, but then if you do, it makes people confused.
“You’re still getting chemo? I thought you were done with that.”
The word remission is another word that is a contradiction. It technically means you’re all better, but really you’re not. Remission to a stage 4 patient often feels like a clock is tick tick ticking in your ear. Every day becomes something that should feel like gratitude, but often feels like nothing but a time bomb.
How long? How soon? When will it come back? Will it come back?
Being in remission is the kind of thing that should make you happy, but instead, it’s often the opposite. You’ve made it through the toughest part, and as they should, the people you know carry on…Business as usual. Even your family carries on, business as usual. My kids, like most, want to spend endless hours playing their video games, tweeting, and watching YouTube.
“Want to go to the beach? To lunch? To walk the dog?” “No, Mom.”
I guess to any other Mom this would feel normal, but in my case, it often turns into major anxiety. I raise my voice. I get agitated. I accuse everyone of being wrapped up in stupid electronics. They look at me like I’m crazy, so I head into the bedroom, shut the door, and cry. I resist the urge to shout at them. I want to tell them I may not be here soon. I want to say that it might be a good memory, to remember us walking the dog, or having lunch. I want bottle up the memories for them, because they are so oblivious to the fact that I may not be here in a year, or two, or three… But I don’t tell them that.
I run my house. I feed the cat. I do the laundry. I watch my baby Eliza as she tumbles in her gym class, as she laughs on the swings, as she pets puppies and watches Elmo. I try to enjoy these moments, but every minute I’m wondering, “Shouldn’t I be taking videos or pictures?” I wonder if she’ll remember how we watched Dumbo together. I think about her getting on the bus to kindergarten and wonder if someone will remember to fix her hair the way I like it. I wonder who will bake her cupcakes for her birthday and sing her lullabies at night.
My husband likes to joke that I am not an early riser, and that it’s super hard for me to wake up. What he doesn’t know is that I reluctantly come to bed each night, knowing that I will toss and turn for hours as little thoughts creep into my head about my children and how they will manage if I’m gone. I worry that my chemo isn’t working. I worry that my medications will cease being effective. I worry that I will join the ranks of the millions before me who have succumb. I google clinical trials in the middle of the night. I try to breathe. I try not to wake my husband with the soft hiccups that come from silent sobs. I drift off to sleep before the sun rises. And then I get up to start another day.
I get my tests. I get my scans. I get my shots. I take my pills. I become immune to the various nurses who take my blood pressure. I breathe deeply through the endless needle pricks. I look past the sick people in the chairs next to me. I wear nice clothes and do my hair. I look healthy. People call me heroine, survivor, miracle.
There never seems to be a moment to come up for air. Surviving is a daily business, so there’s no let-up. It feels like endlessly swimming upstream. The emotional drain can be exhausting. Yet, there is so much to be grateful for, so much to laugh about, and so much life to live. And don’t get me wrong; I do live. But it does feel a bit like treading water every day, bobbing in a constant sea of uncertainty. You get on with it quietly, hoping no one pays you too much attention. Yet sometimes, there’s that wistful ache, when you want to gently remind the ones you love not to ever forget.

How about a new kitchen?

Jennifer — Sat, 21 Jan 2012 23:36:30 +0000

5 months into our new life here in California, my husband and I both had a laugh when one evening over a glass of wine, we each reluctantly shared that we’re both feeling slightly disappointed with the location of our new house. Between all of Ian’s travel and my auditions and appointments, spending more time in the car than we are at our home was not what we envisioned. And although our neighborhood and home are beautiful, we city-folk are longing for a little more LA buzz. After breathing a mutual sigh of relief, we did what any crazy couple like us would do: we put the house on the market this week!

We’ve been looking in several different areas of LA and we have seen some lovely homes as well as some serious disasters. One house in particular has a very nice kitchen with brand new appliances. The cabinetry is dark though, and would I love to get my hands on it! I’ve been lying awake at night, dreaming about it. The broker overheard me talking “white” to my husband. She told me it would be a “crime” to change the cabinets. “People in California prefer dark wood!” Really? Well, um…okay. Not for me. Here’s the kitchen:

Now, I know some of you might like these cabinets. They actually are very nice. However, my heart flutters when I see kitchens that look like this:

It would be great to take out the big island and the kitchen table in the brown kitchen and make a huge island like this:

Nothing says California to me like an open, airy kitchen with clean white cabinetry and lots of sunlight flooding the room. It just makes me feel happy. And you can bet, that the dark cabinets in the top photos will look just like the rest of them by the time I’m finished. And hey, maybe we’ll even stay awhile this time. We don’t ever keep things simple around here, but we do have a lot of fun! Have a great week! xoxo Jennifer

And to all a goodnight….

Jennifer — Mon, 26 Dec 2011 04:56:23 +0000

What a year! The horrible winter, the big move, adjusting to life in a new place. We’ve finally settled in. The house is coming together. The stockings were hung, the tree was trimmed, the gifts were opened, the feast was divine. Time to relax until the New Year. I want to thank each and every one of you who have joined the blog. It’s been only 9 months, but I have over 1700 followers. I hope my stories continue to inspire you, make you laugh and touch your hearts. 2012 is sure to bring some exciting things. Many of you have been asking if I’m going to set up a retail store in LA. Well, the answer to that, (I answer wistfully) is no…I still have a toddler at home. I just couldn’t devote the time to a store right now. That being said, I will be launching the online store VERY soon, which I’m really excited about!

And January is right around the corner, so I’d better get busy.

I have loved all of your comments and all of your support, it has meant so much to me. I wasn’t sure how I was going to launch Chalk Farm Home “the blog”, but you’ve all embraced my life, my style and my thoughts and you’ve been a huge part of my year! So thank you from the bottom of my heart. And an extra special thanks to my incredible husband Ian for the new professional Nikon camera to make my photos even more beautiful. I’m a lucky girl. See you in 2012.

Love,

Jennifer

xoxo

Christmas time at the Agoura Antique Mart….

Jennifer — Wed, 30 Nov 2011 21:00:14 +0000

If you saw my latest post about my dining room, you’ll know that I have made lots of purchases from the Agoura Antique Mart. I found it on my first day visiting the area and it’s become one of my favorite places to drop by, sometimes a few times a week! The owner, Maria, is a lovely lady who always has time for a chat and a smile. The mart is 9,000 square ft. with over 40 different dealers. It’s a favorite by many locals as well as designers like Brooke Giannetti of Velvet & Linen, and Rachel Ashwell, who just listed Agoura Antique Mart as one of her favorite resources in her new book. Last week, they had their annual holiday open house and the displays were beautiful and the food was yummy. Be sure to stop by for a visit during the holidays!

Have a wonderful week! xoxo Jennifer

Vintageweave Interiors book signing…..

Jennifer — Wed, 23 Nov 2011 01:59:33 +0000

What a incredible evening! I finally had the chance to visit Kathleen Delgado’s beautiful shop Vintageweave Interiors while she was hosting a book signing for Brandyn Barbara Artis’ marvelous memoir Running Barefoot in Paris. Kathleen was a big-time commercial real estate gal in LA before leaving that world behind to pursue all things French. Vintageweave describes itself as a “French Farmhouse Lifestyle Boutique”, and what a boutique it is. This place is every Francophile’s dream come true. Such a treasure trove. Everywhere you turn, it takes your breath away. The displays are gorgeous. The merchandise is stunning. I wanted to buy everything! I don’t usually post so many photos, but there are so many beautiful images, I didn’t know how to choose! Enjoy….and Happy Thanksgiving everyone! Have a wonderful and restful holiday.

Jennifer

xoxo

The lovely Kathleen Delgado, proprietress of Vintageweave Interiors.

Hanging out with Kymberley, owner of A Beautiful Mes s.

The new dining room…..

Jennifer — Sun, 06 Nov 2011 21:39:41 +0000

Hello friends. The kids are out for the afternoon, so I finally have a moment to show you a few photos. Things are shaping up slowly in our new house and it’s so much fun discovering all of the wonderful shops here in Los Angeles. I sold nearly all of our belongings before our cross country move, and I mean everything. All of the furniture, pots, pans, silverware, art work, and most of my collections. I’ve had a few moments of regret, but mostly it’s been really fun starting over. It’s also been a great lesson in letting things go, and I am taking great care to only buy what I really love now. I love to collect, but the danger in such a passion is that it’s pretty easy to fill up your closets, garages and basements with treasures that you may or may not use. So I take my time now and I don’t impulse shop unless I know I have a place for something. Just as fun? Well, of course not, but it is more cost effective. Did I mention it makes my husband happier, too?

One of rooms is nearly “done” and that’s the dining room. I’m sure I’ll add a few more things here and there. I hope you enjoy the photos!

The table and chairs are from Restoration Hardware. I found the table at the outlet marked down 70%. What a score! The chairs are upholstered in white linen.

This old white cabinet was our first purchase for the house and so I designed the room around it. We found it at The Agoura Antique Mart.

I have always collected white pottery. Some of my new finds came from The Remnants of the Past show, Anthropologie, and one of my favorite shops, Tori Spelling’s boutique Inventori in Sherman Oaks.

This beautiful platter was a housewarming gift from my friend Nikki. It’s from my favorite pottery company in Paris, Astier de villatte.

This beautiful antique crystal chandelier is from The Agoura Antique Mart .

The large antique gold mirror is from Paris, and it’s one of the few things I moved across the country.

This 1920′s pair of iron trellis with old flower pots came out of a house in Santa Barbara.

I love this glass jar in a willow branch basket. I bought this as well as the iron trellis from a wonderful dealer in The Agoura Antique Mart. (Can you tell I love that place?)

The walls are painted Farrow and Ball’s Elephant’s Breath.

Thanks for stopping by. Have a wonderful week! xo Jennifer

Remnants of The Past show….

Jennifer — Tue, 11 Oct 2011 16:00:16 +0000

Remember Dorothy’s face in The Wizard of Oz, when she opens the door and sees the colorful, enchanting world of Oz? That was me Saturday morning as I passed thru the doorway into The Remnants of The Past Show. I’d been dying to come to this show ever since I heard about it last year, and it was everything I had hoped it would be, and then some! Is there something in the water here in California, because for being up so early, every vendor had a smile and was thrilled to be there. Unlike many antique shows where anyone can set up a booth, creator Judy Watkins hand-picks each vendor from a long list of submissions. One after another, the booths were gorgeous! I had to do a few laps before I could start shopping because I was so overwhelmed when I walked in. I took hundreds of photos, everything was so breathtaking. It was hard to choose which to post. But here are some of my favorites:

The displays were incredible!

I loved these clock faces

Are you speechless yet?

In addition to beautiful vintage finds, many of the vendors had gorgeous handmade items.

One booth had little packets of old letters tied with twine, which I loved.

This booth had gorgeous displays of French baskets, urns, bistro chairs and garden items.

Ian snapped this one of me.

Loved this HOLLYWOOD sign!

Antique baskets from France.

More beautiful antique garden planters

Kymberley Brown Fraser’s booth A Beautiful Mess was absolutely stunning.

Ian took this one of Kym and I.

This was your first view when you entered the show.

The outdoor vendors really played up their location by using lots of plants and flowers in their displays.

I snagged this painting from A Beautiful Mess the minute I walked into the show.

This table was wonderful. It’s an old apothecary cabinet.

I almost bought these chairs, even though I have no place for them!

These are old olive colanders from France.

Glass jars filled with tea-stained sheet music.

It was a truly wonderful day. And it was so lovely to see so many people I knew and to make some new friends along the way. After the show, My husband I did some wine tasting and had some wonderful meals. See you at the next show!

Jennifer

A new coast. A new life…

Jennifer — Mon, 03 Oct 2011 04:31:22 +0000

It’s been 6 weeks since we moved to California. It seems like a lifetime ago. The leaves are turning colors back east, and I miss my friends a lot. but will I ever tire of Southern California? I think not. My house is nestled in the Santa Monica mountains. I love the cool mornings, the blazing hot afternoons and the breezy, bug free evenings. I’m way too vain to show you the bare bones of the interior until things come together a bit more, but the exterior is too gorgeous not to show you! I have visions of vintage french garden furniture, antique bird baths, chippy white urns overflowing with flowers, but for now, I’ll just share with you the beauty of my new backyard.

I have no idea how on earth my husband and I pulled off this move. From a discussion in the dead of winter, to a day of looking at houses in April. It is amazing how all of the pieces came together. I got on a clinical trial at UCLA for a breast cancer study, Ian’s office supported his transfer to the west coast, our house sold in 6 days…I guess you could say some things are meant to be. The stars definitely aligned for us. After a pretty stressful couple of years, Ian and I have spent quite a few evenings in the garden unable to say much, just taking it all in, both of us feeling blessed, somewhat speechless and incredibly lucky. Life is a good thing. We all have the power to grab it by the tail and change directions. You’d be surprised what you can do when you make up your mind!

I’m finally launching my online shopping this week! I’m featuring some gorgeous hand woven linen runners from Tunisia. They are from one of my favorite companies. I only have 6 at the moment, but I will get more. They look gorgeous on a table, thrown over an armchair or even as a shawl. Have a great week and as always, thanks for reading.

Our beautiful saltwater pool.

I love the gorgeous bougenvilla that surrounds the whole pool area.

Our own waterfall!

We’ve been enjoying the hot tub almost every evening!

The garden has lots of beautiful stonework, including this staircase that leads up to the hot tub.

Another waterfall view.

A view from the back corner of the property.

There are roses everywhere!

Jake and I discovered this huge lime tree last week.

We’re enjoying nightly dinners in the garden prepared by our personal chef, Ian. (AKA, my husband.)

Here’s one of the gorgeous linen runners I am selling this week.

I love how gauzy and light the linen is, and the beautiful soft colors.

They would look beautiful draped over a chair or an antique basket.

The colors are soft and beautiful.

A perfect table with a gorgeous runner from Dreamy Whites….

These beautiful runners are $95. I don’t have many! I can get more in the next few weeks. You can purchase them thru Paypal using jraebeck@aol.com. please specify blue, olive, or fuschia.

Thanks for stopping by.

Jennifer

Move on….

Jennifer — Tue, 23 Aug 2011 02:59:29 +0000

Why is moving so hard?

I’m not talking about packing boxes and sorting your forks and spoons and getting the courage to part with that coat from 1986 you love so much. I’m talking about the memories you make. I’ve lived in many houses and apartments. Some I don’t remember, some I think of fondly, but 272 Midland Avenue is the one I think I’ll remember the most….

I moved out of NYC in 2006, into a gorgeous 1927 Georgian Colonial. 6 bedrooms, 6 bathrooms, lots of money to spare. The booming real estate market was crazy in NYC, and the profits enabled me to renovate the bathrooms, outfit a new kitchen and drive a Range Rover around town. But my beautiful home was just a band-aid for an ailing marriage. The pool, the rose garden, the cars…there was nothing I could do to save it, and soon I found myself in the role of single mom.

My new house was known around town as “The brown house.” And boy, was it brown. Light brown. With dark brown trim. The inside had brown walls and a brown fireplace, and dreary wallpaper that looked like maybe at one time it had been cheery, but now it was just…brown. The kitchen floor was covered in aging linoleum. The garden was full of weeds. The rooms throughout the house ached of age and neglect. Friends and family came and couldn’t hide their looks of despair. Yes, it was all a bit downhill. Even my children hated the place. My daughter dubbed it ”Home, Horrible Home.” They didn’t see what I saw. It was all mine.

The movers dumped boxes in my living room and in my backyard in the middle of a freezing cold January afternoon. Without help, it took me ages to unpack them. Some weeks there were boxes covered in snow outside my window. I unpacked and painted. I frequented flea markets. I tore clipping out of magazines. I ran my store. I planned and I schemed. We ate a lot of pizza. Some nights I danced around the house with a bottle of wine, giddy with my newfound freedom. Other nights I sobbed, as I wondered what on earth I had gotten into. Especially when I couldn’t fix a TV, a computer broke, or a toilet wouldn’t flush. Slowly, however, the house began to take shape.

Somewhere in the midst of all of the chaos, I found Ian. We daydreamed about having a baby, and eventually we were blessed with Eliza. The spare room became a nursery. As my pregnancy went on and I became more and more sick, I spent most afternoons in the den watching episodes of the Dr. Phil show. There were the nights my husband spent pacing the floors, wondering if I would ever return home as I lay in the ICU, suffering from acute liver failure after delivering our baby 2 months early. There was the morning I sat on the front porch when my doctor confirmed that there was indeed cancer raging within my liver. There were the days I couldn’t get out of bed, sick from chemotherapy. We finally brought home our 5-lb. baby girl after a month-long stay in the NICU. There were Christmas trees and Easter egg hunts here. There were birthday parties and trick-or-treaters. Eliza slept in the stroller while I planted flowers in the summer. The warm sunroom became a favorite spot while Maddie and I waited for her 7 am school bus during the bleak winters.

I get a lump in my throat as my eyes scan the rooms and I take an inventory of all of my days here. There’s the hydrangea I planted that never really blooms well. It gets too much shade and not enough sun.The floors creak on the second floor staircase and the air conditioner is too noisy on the third floor. But I love the smell of the garden in the morning. I love hearing the train when it starts running at 5:30 am. I love the rush of cars as parents drive their kids to school. I’ll miss the coffee at Bluestone Coffee Company in Watchung Plaza. I’ll miss the squirrel who broke into my bird feeder every summer. I’ll miss the buds that appear in April outside the kitchen window and turn from pink to green, and then to red, before they quietly flutter from their branches. I’ll miss my street with its shady oak trees, and the seasonal flowers that begin with tulips, then peonies, lilies, black-eyed Susans, and finally end with mums and pumpkins.

Change is a good thing. I really became who I am in this house. Being on my own was hard. But I did it. We did it. Ian’s arrival turned my house into a home. Eliza’s arrival made us all a family. People say to me “Wow…I wish I could move to California.” Well, what are you waiting for? Make a change. Be brave. You only get one chance, one life. Move on. Cry a little, pack your bags. And go.