tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-22301585995388770192011-12-09T22:26:45.796-08:00Asa Williamshttp://www.blogger.com/profile/01154787965917567610noreply@blogger.comBlogger114125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2230158599538877019.post-63931692401945232912011-08-03T18:55:00.000-07:002011-08-03T18:57:39.374-07:002011-08-03T18:57:39.374-07:00<a onblur="try {parent.deselectBloggerImageGracefully();} catch(e) {}" href="http://dreaminthelife.com/wp-content/uploads/2010/02/depression.jpg"><img style="display:block; margin:0px auto 10px; text-align:center;cursor:pointer; cursor:hand;width: 500px; height: 336px;" src="http://dreaminthelife.com/wp-content/uploads/2010/02/depression.jpg" border="0" alt="" /></a><br />Who am I?<br /><br />Seems a question i should have long since answered <br />but the complexities of its nature plague the mind like cancer... <br /><br />prolonging the inevitable choices by peppering my logic with flights of fancy... <br /><br />dreams I breathe fade into existence like clouds that bleed... <br /><br />obscuring the obstacles, the marauders... <br /> I dance... look can you see?... <br /><br />Distorted realities attack my wilted rose and the petals that fall <br />will ripple through my dark waters to distort the reflections cast down by my bleeding clouds... <br /><br />pitter pattering droplets pound softly as my dreams drum their life away <br />and succumb to dark watered tombs and ripple outward<br /> <br />until lost and marooned... <br />on an isle under my brightest moon... <br /><br />a secret place... <br /><br />where desires are encouraged to taste the waters of a forgotten fate <br />where even darkness roams free and safe from all of your "UNDERstanding" <br /><br />the ships that you're sailing to carry away my fallen petals <br />will disappear forever beyond the veil of my limitations to become immortalized within my convictions... <br /><br />wouldn't it have been easier just to pay attention? <br /><br />Or can you not afford the price paid in truth? <br />A self sacrificing altar with the body of virgin youth... <br /><br />peddling away our innocence for the morsels <br />dropped by the denizens of the human heart <br /><br />we invision a lust that can sustain us remake us remove the pain of self inflicted shame cuz... <br /><br />we are ultimately affraid of... a reflection... <br />of not having any direction of dying without having survived lifes lessons... <br /><br />I'm afraid... <br /><br />and not ashamed to admit it... i've left dreams in the darkness unrequited <br /><br />but who am I? <br /><br />I used to be indifferent... <br /><br />a casual observer in the maelstrom of my evolving imagination <br />a divination of the reflection of my dimming soul... <br /><br />but now... who have I become but a martyr? <br /><br />a shit starter... <br /><br />screaming at the injustice of a world spiraling down the storm drain of malcontent <br />with every single last breath spent... <br /><br />and wasted... <br /><br />just to repent to the devils shadow and indulge on the tasteless droppings of human waste <br />as more bullshit fills the shoes and sheets of suit wearing sheep... <br /><br />haven't we all inadvertently left stains on the white carpets of faith? <br />aren't we all liars, flip flopping, self serving egotists? <br /><br />Sadists and Masochists enlisting the fallen excuses of the fallen useless? <br />Don't they say that truth is... in the eye of the beholder? <br /><br />aren't we all the molders of reality? <br /><br />and with truth in our eyes... we are blinded... <br />constantly searching to rewind our faults to a time when... <br /><br />we were perfect? <br />HaHa such a notion is worthless... <br /><br />yet we continue to chase those feathers into the wind storms of our own creation <br />and then cry when the wrath of a true God takes our toys away... <br /><br />but please stay... at least for awhile until I clear my throat from this bile... <br />become a little more docile with the homicidal... <br /><br />as the dust settles on blood scratched parchment <br />I see that I need no pattern no rhyme that rations <br /><br />my thoughts... <br /><br />and I don't need a metaphor... <br />I can paint murder and make it an art form with dry bristles... <br /><br />because really all the semantics mean little <br />and everything I have to teach is in the clear steady tones of the proverbial whistle <br /><br />and the casting of chicken bones along the uneven stones of my path <br />with unequivocal, unambiguous wrath I take chances on ambitious plans <br /><br />and reach high... <br /><br />living up to my full potential and I try... <br /><br />to reach higher than the devils shadow... and I scream...<br />while trapped beneath the waves of my dark waters... drowning with a dream...<div class="blogger-post-footer"><img width='1' height='1' src='https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/tracker/2230158599538877019-6393169240194523291?l=chaoticvirgo.blogspot.com' alt='' /></div><img src="http://feeds.feedburner.com/~r/chaoticvirgo/~4/7P8sOdd47ug" height="1" width="1"/>Asa Williamshttp://www.blogger.com/profile/01154787965917567610noreply@blogger.com0http://chaoticvirgo.blogspot.com/2011/08/who-am-i-drowning-with-dream.htmltag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2230158599538877019.post-59433593716802774422011-03-09T08:48:00.001-08:002011-03-09T08:48:37.532-08:002011-03-09T08:48:37.532-08:00I write today inspired by your lies...<br /><br />Deception runs evident... <br /><br />In rivulets decent from ocular madness <br />I deciphered the patterns from your water falling caverns<br /><br /> trickling its last drop into pools along our feet <br />salt burning the cuts from our rat race ragged pursuit of bitterness's sweet <br />symphonic sodomy punishing along the inside of all of me... <br /><br />Why chase feathers decorated with shards of 'forever after' <br />when the scars left behind breezed along with the echoed laughter of my devoured countenance... <br />Wintered expressions wither further with deceptions... <br /><br />As my smile hibernates along the edges of due north... <br />Truth bitch... Can you seek it? NO... "of course not" <br /><br />shy away from reality as the ego cannot be fought <br />just deprived of all thought or has all cognitive reasoning been tossed up and forgot? <br /><br />Smoke some marijuana or has all of "loves seasoning" been lost amongst the rot? <br />Call it what you wanna but I'm still dreaming of a moment long since forgotten... <br /><br />Slipping along the revelry of my brainwaves behaving as children at play <br />teeter tottering on a merry go round ...<br /><br />...As a thousand voices screaming being my only back drop of sound... <br /><br />So cry those tears... <br /><br />Even as your mask plots an attack <br />the cold logic facts wont push back the traps you lay for your reasoning... <br /><br />Because sometimes even seeing doesn’t equate to believing... <br /><br />And you lost your faith in me...<div class="blogger-post-footer"><img width='1' height='1' src='https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/tracker/2230158599538877019-5943359371680277442?l=chaoticvirgo.blogspot.com' alt='' /></div><img src="http://feeds.feedburner.com/~r/chaoticvirgo/~4/jvwO0upS-dg" height="1" width="1"/>Asa Williamshttp://www.blogger.com/profile/01154787965917567610noreply@blogger.com0http://chaoticvirgo.blogspot.com/2011/03/deception.htmltag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2230158599538877019.post-58051034638078645292011-03-09T08:47:00.002-08:002011-03-09T08:48:08.762-08:002011-03-09T08:48:08.762-08:00I like to pretend... <br /><br />That there is no tomorrow with out there being an "US" <br /><br />like I would die in my sleep <br />as the warmth cooled from your imprint <br />and left me stranded in disbelief <br />as the world stood still for me... <br /><br />For without the light that gave birth to our connection <br />the world would grow dark and turn the opposite direction...<br /><br />...All of existence would sit stop and look <br />as the daylight flipped like a new page in an old book.<br /><br />I like to pretend... <br /><br />That there is no ending without our beginning... <br />Like Armageddon's fire merely lit the candle light on our night stand ... <br /><br />Like tasting each others heavenly desires <br />before we unleash hell by the glow of hearth fires... <br /><br />...Burning alongside our sin and devotion <br />like the world burning along the edge of its oceans and I pretend... <br /><br />...And I dream... <br /><br />I envision a love without end or freeze <br />a love that carries through the strife like wings to a breeze <br />with a passion that transcends all time and disease <br />an ever last bastion over shadowing dark watered seas <br /><br />In similar fashion to your gazes reaction...<br />A welcome distraction from the cold in my soul...<br /><br />... As my heart melts away with me...<br /><br />And I pretend... And sometimes I forget... <br /><br />...That I'm gifted... <br /><br />Not talented or special but spiritually lifted... <br /><br />I guess the lord knew I would need a flame in the night, a ghost in the dark, <br />a spark to carry through the gloom when my heart would fall apart. <br /><br />But I remember times... So many times... <br /><br />I sat trapped inside my head...<br />...a prisoner wrapped within the confines of his own personal dread...<br /><br />But you were there for me... <br /><br />...Or so I pretend.<div class="blogger-post-footer"><img width='1' height='1' src='https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/tracker/2230158599538877019-5805103463807864529?l=chaoticvirgo.blogspot.com' alt='' /></div><img src="http://feeds.feedburner.com/~r/chaoticvirgo/~4/iqruKTRgyXA" height="1" width="1"/>Asa Williamshttp://www.blogger.com/profile/01154787965917567610noreply@blogger.com0http://chaoticvirgo.blogspot.com/2011/03/i-like-to-pretend.htmltag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2230158599538877019.post-29301813100099556122011-03-09T08:47:00.001-08:002011-03-09T08:47:44.917-08:002011-03-09T08:47:44.917-08:00Filthy animal 'I am'... I stole the gift of over-grand-standing from Intelligent Designs my crimes range from those of the inhumane to those of the insane as every thought is a wish upon the universe... <br /><br />You see 'I am' master of this game... The riddler, the one-verse, the new verse, the pale horse and the stretch hearse. The pen with a sickle starts to trickle a little life on life made simple... <br /><br />Then more complex as I flex and digest the unrest of a billion souls laid to rest and yes... I will test that intellect into "X's" and "Checks" with balances not met yet, all for a promise to never scribe my best yet.<br /><br />Because 'I am' a beastly creature mentally scared like horror features for thought processes... The eastern star teacher... My nightmare reaching deep for the keeper of secrets... 'I am' the seeker of deep seeded dreams... <br /><br />'I am' Realities rip torn at the seams as I set fire to the emerald curtain and scream into the faces of false prophets spittin' vomit peppered to taste like wanton lust with the smell of dust as He breathed life into all of us... <br /><br />But everyone just trust... And sleep sound... No one will rape you when the laws not around... No one will leave him dead on the ground... Just trust... The only being that cares is 'us' <br /><br />That’s why 'I am' the manifestation of religious blood lust come full circle to bite the tails of tales in the bud-ding blossoms of a good mans wails :UH: <br /><br />'I am' the sad clown turned wicked, the juggler of jugulars and I ripped it from the throats of poets in 16 bars don’t quote it yet because I'm not finished stacking cold dishes on the proverbial plate of my revenge, bitches...<br /><br />'I am' the darkness twisted the chaotic heart beats demented to the rhythms of always smiling women, eyes wide open in intimate moments for fear of love stroking the life outta me <br /><br />So Fly with me... Vibe with me... Ride with me on the waves of free speaking seas and breath life with me... For 'I am' you... And you are me... Combined with darkness... To form the... Essence of humanities Egoic Trinity...<div class="blogger-post-footer"><img width='1' height='1' src='https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/tracker/2230158599538877019-2930181310009955612?l=chaoticvirgo.blogspot.com' alt='' /></div><img src="http://feeds.feedburner.com/~r/chaoticvirgo/~4/dEku-5xMYLM" height="1" width="1"/>Asa Williamshttp://www.blogger.com/profile/01154787965917567610noreply@blogger.com0http://chaoticvirgo.blogspot.com/2011/03/egoic-trinity-i-am.htmltag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2230158599538877019.post-56282616386730811952011-03-09T08:46:00.000-08:002011-03-09T08:47:21.136-08:002011-03-09T08:47:21.136-08:00MMM let me taste those illicit dark demonesstic lips... <br />Quick to whip bad girls into fits of twisted bliss <br />dark leather strips across red marked hips... That’s a start little bitch... <br /><br />Now follow my nightmare into your wet dream... <br />we'll both scream as you cream your delights across my demonic sight <br />in a rush of excitement and fright as you realize my intentions to go all night... <br /><br />Before I chloroform your form for a daylight rest <br />Right before more nocturnal tests of pain tolerance... Yes... <br />You ain't goin no where whore... <br /><br />Just a brief reprieve from wet nightmare dreams before you awake begging for more... <br />So what's the "O" score? Crimson roman numerals etched along your flesh board... <br />Otherwise known as your back... <br /><br />and what's that? Don't talk back or you're bound to get that ass slapped "CRACK" <br />I guess I better put that gag back... For your own protection... <br />How can you open your mouth and still learn my dark lesson? <br /><br />You see... I am master... And you are slave... <br />pain erasing the morality with the pleasure that I gave...<br /><br />evidence displayed with wetness as I press this blade into the entrance of hells cage and I confess this I mix my desire with rage then relish the sight of you and the changes that I made...<br /><br />From closet freak to my meat on sheets... <br />Here's a little treat mama cita...<br /><br />a little release from intimate tease as I beat the good girl out of ya... Ya that’s sweet. <br /><br />Just the tip as I flick those hemp bound tits and twist your close lined clit into grips of dripping bliss... <br /><br />Here... Sit on this little miss as I kiss those dark trembling lips and embark on another journey into black heart misery ready for the start of cathartic intimacy so make ready... <br /><br />For my fantasy... <br /><br />My lust is a dark passenger in a 57' Chevy with no answers... And you're in the trunk... <br />Drugged up and tied up like a good little slut waiting to be plugged the fuck up... <br /><br />But don’t worry about getting knocked up cunt... Good girls like you could never make a man cum... <br /><br />But don't worry sweetness... I'll let you try... ;)<br /><br /><br />~Chaotic Virgo<div class="blogger-post-footer"><img width='1' height='1' src='https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/tracker/2230158599538877019-5628261638673081195?l=chaoticvirgo.blogspot.com' alt='' /></div><img src="http://feeds.feedburner.com/~r/chaoticvirgo/~4/VxV7i_mqo0g" height="1" width="1"/>Asa Williamshttp://www.blogger.com/profile/01154787965917567610noreply@blogger.com0http://chaoticvirgo.blogspot.com/2011/03/my-dark-twisted-fantasy.htmltag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2230158599538877019.post-3228103434336449022011-03-09T08:45:00.000-08:002011-03-09T08:46:47.155-08:002011-03-09T08:46:47.155-08:00How does one ever begin to convey the feelings of loss of destruction today... <br /><br />I've leapt I've dived I've ripped my heart out and died <br />for the feeling of dismissal the indifferent missile like deaths razor sharp sickle <br />I don’t understand all the needless reprimand <br />or how you can stand to walk off with a man <br /><br />knowing I'm held back holding out son as a ward against attack... <br />It’s the truth... A cold honest fact... <br />That between me and you I've got it good I've got it bad... <br />Jealous beyond the boundaries of demands... <br /><br />No ring on your finger... No truth to my promise... <br />I just thought after it all you'd be honest <br />but I cannot expect, demand, or regard <br />The flawed nature of your being walking the side of the boulevard. <br /><br />Because really? What the fuck did I do?... <br />Other than swallow the jagged pill stand up and stay true... <br />What did I do beside give my life to you? <br /><br />This is all just a dream a fucking nightmare... <br />The image of you and of her... I need to repair... <br />I'm lost on my own... And you control my spirit <br />wake me when my good deeds suddenly have merit... <br />Cant stand but to share it I tried not to scare it... <br />Just stood, gritted my teeth and bared it... <br />I'd like to let it all loose... But I choose to despair it... <br />After the facts too late don’t know if I can mirror it... <br /><br />I fear all of it but sit back and quit <br />the rise of the tide inside my minds jealous side.... <br />Because I don’t have the right no engagement in sight... <br />I'm a fucking donor... The creator of life but in life there are 23 chromosomes pushed to the side... <br /><br />This ride goes on too long for me to just hide... <br />Set me on a path of unforgiving mass... I traveled down at last after your time came to pass... <br /><br />And don’t hear me... <br /><br />Oh no whatever you do don’t hear me... <br /><br />Let me be the whispers that gnaw at your pride <br />let me be the reason you stood up and lied <br />let me be the tears that fell when you cried <br />and let me be the knife for a life of suicide...<div class="blogger-post-footer"><img width='1' height='1' src='https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/tracker/2230158599538877019-322810343433644902?l=chaoticvirgo.blogspot.com' alt='' /></div><img src="http://feeds.feedburner.com/~r/chaoticvirgo/~4/P50p2bWWEAc" height="1" width="1"/>Asa Williamshttp://www.blogger.com/profile/01154787965917567610noreply@blogger.com0http://chaoticvirgo.blogspot.com/2011/03/what-did-i-do.htmltag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2230158599538877019.post-89301455392106131622011-03-09T08:44:00.000-08:002011-03-09T08:45:39.139-08:002011-03-09T08:45:39.139-08:00Love knows no boundaries, no heights, and no reason... <br /><br />I kill for love, speak ill of love... I eat mother fucking pills for love... <br />But I gotta have it... <br /><br />Because I got a habit for the manic, the hopeless romantic... <br /><br />I Find the beauty in the unseeing eyes of tragic fanatics killed by heart string love tactics <br /><br />I gotta know if its enough to reach up and snatch it...<br /><br />from the hands of the divine and melt two minds in mine... <br />I gotta know what its like to intertwine <br />be one with thy <br />one sun in one sky <br />come on now lets fly... Give a little psycho fellowship a try...<br /><br />because I... <br />Am only creating a vibe... <br />Still hot breath on thighs... <br />Wrapped with cold dead flesh... SURPRISE! <br /><br />Let me get you wet... <br />Then shock your cerebellum into a symphony of forget... <br />At the very least you can hate me... But still feel the beast... <br />ALL YOU ZOOPHILIACS rape me like prom dates in Cadillac's <br />as I sharpen my shank to cut bullshit and take stabs at facts <br /><br />because when I write its shit in my grin or blood on my pen <br />its pain or fun, emotions that run, or dead poets and a smoking gun <br /><br />as shadows laugh <br />at epitaphs <br />skin graphs <br />from road rash <br />as I pass <br />the path <br />of good intentions... <br /><br />and wear darkness like Prada <br />cross dressing evil like I gotta make the devil smaller... <br /><br />So... <br />Haha... <br />I love... <br /><br />...At All Times... <br /><br />But may seem numb from daily grinds <br />and saddened by reflected crimes... <br /><br />But I love... <br /><br />...At All Times... <br /><br />At all costs and without reason <br />I love for the sake of feeling <br />without a heart there is no meaning <br />just breathing, shitting, eating, sleeping... <br />A darkness with no room for dreaming... <br /><br />So... <br />Haha... <br />I live... <br /><br />...Sometimes... <br /><br />Sometimes the life is quenched inside <br />by syphoning off your projected pride... <br />Feeding off the residual emotion <br />the aftermath of pain and devotion <br />where resentment can run as deep as oceans <br />and hatred puts her plan into motion. <br /><br />...Drip...Drip...Drip...Drip... <br /><br />Insanity slips like my realities grip <br />until I'm falling... Laughing along the way recalling...<br /><br />A Stereogram Metaphor That I Once Heard Before... <br /><br />...HAHAHA...<br /><br />...think about that insanity... <br /><br /><br />...HAHAHA...<div class="blogger-post-footer"><img width='1' height='1' src='https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/tracker/2230158599538877019-8930145539210613162?l=chaoticvirgo.blogspot.com' alt='' /></div><img src="http://feeds.feedburner.com/~r/chaoticvirgo/~4/MqE9rKuYT3Y" height="1" width="1"/>Asa Williamshttp://www.blogger.com/profile/01154787965917567610noreply@blogger.com0http://chaoticvirgo.blogspot.com/2011/03/beautiful-insanity.htmltag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2230158599538877019.post-74657102986450440742010-11-19T13:41:00.000-08:002010-11-19T13:43:49.744-08:002010-11-19T13:43:49.744-08:00<a onblur="try {parent.deselectBloggerImageGracefully();} catch(e) {}" href="http://farm4.static.flickr.com/3065/3638557126_7b7f01fffe.jpg"><img style="float:left; margin:0 10px 10px 0;cursor:pointer; cursor:hand;width: 348px; height: 500px;" src="http://farm4.static.flickr.com/3065/3638557126_7b7f01fffe.jpg" border="0" alt="" /></a><br /><br /><br />Can you see it? Fly with me... <br /><br />Another dream to see free speaking breeze along your intentions... <br />The invention of interventions failed to listen when slit wrists like lips failed to mention <br />a bad habit in contention with the semantics of emotional contradiction <br />With this comes a simple reality derived from fiction <br /><br />READ YO BOOK LIKE YA LEARN SOMFIN ... <br />Or blow up an orphanage because a dead guy spoke SOMFIN <br />words in red like he actually wrote SOMFIN <br /><br />why should he die because the same guy gave him amnesty <br />can you not fathom the tragedy of this reality? <br /><br />Get up stand up Bob Marley the fuck up and trust... <br />There is no reason that we must make this much fuss <br />over tabernacles layered in rust and historical leaders with religious blood lust <br />just shut the fuck up and fly with us... Or die with us <br />neither one of us inclined to end war time crimes "In God We Trust" <br /><br />Allowing these thoughts to spin into chaos <br />twisting the loss into a storm cloud of rot <br />for all of the spinning the progress stopped <br /><br />and laid stagnant the eye of the storm funneling madness <br />right into the sweet spot of my joy like magnets <br />sticking to my soul like deaths sweet kisses <br />the deafening screams but no one seemed to listen... <br /><br />as the light got pulled from my sight tonight <br />my brother laid dead in the street tonight... <br /><br />...But you didn't think about that... <br /><br />Before you smiled and spat before the scab healed over my graveyard tat <br />you sat back and laughed and grabbed at heart string facts <br /><br />but don’t know what to call 'em... <br />Justice is this... Click... Clock... I Got 'em... <br />all of these tears but lord I don't want 'em... <br />so I let my heart ink from thoughts of rock bottom. <br /><br />I let you think I scribed then forgot 'em <br />I write sheets to breeze along my senses <br />I write to keep myself from going senseless <br />I write to hear when my heart won't listen <br />I write to let go... move on... be forgiven...<div class="blogger-post-footer"><img width='1' height='1' src='https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/tracker/2230158599538877019-7465710298645044074?l=chaoticvirgo.blogspot.com' alt='' /></div><img src="http://feeds.feedburner.com/~r/chaoticvirgo/~4/I6Hlzw-vzZ0" height="1" width="1"/>Asa Williamshttp://www.blogger.com/profile/01154787965917567610noreply@blogger.com0http://chaoticvirgo.blogspot.com/2010/11/i-write-with-thoughts-from-rock-bottom.htmltag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2230158599538877019.post-85163360944857680622010-11-11T11:39:00.000-08:002010-11-11T11:40:57.731-08:002010-11-11T11:40:57.731-08:00<a onblur="try {parent.deselectBloggerImageGracefully();} catch(e) {}" href="http://farm4.static.flickr.com/3409/3563779010_4c0df664cb_o.jpg"><img style="float:left; margin:0 10px 10px 0;cursor:pointer; cursor:hand;width: 637px; height: 1000px;" src="http://farm4.static.flickr.com/3409/3563779010_4c0df664cb_o.jpg" border="0" alt="" /></a><br /><br /><br />Alright pops... I know you can't speak with me... Well... at least not on this frequency... But let me speak about me and how your absence left me... Walking through life aimlessly... <br /><br /><br />Yeah... I've lied... I've fought...<br /><br />I've left all my good thoughts to rot in the compost pile of forgotten smiles and still I stand... <br /><br />Breathing deep the aroma for awhile as I contemplate my current situation <br />on the proverbial plate of my current station... <br /><br />I laugh at the tears as they drip from the waste <br />and I taste the fears as they leak from her face <br />and I feel the burn of a long winded race <br />as I chase feathers into the recess of fate... <br /><br />Chase but never catch, <br />create but never last, <br />the past will last as long as <br />the shame of past mishaps <br /><br />sing a song for the infamy <br />rising up inside of me <br />destroying me entirely <br />and yes I miss him direly... <br /><br />But what can you do? <br />God saw fit to take his breath from you...<br /> <br />now all that’s left is the dew drops on scattered ashes <br />the salty wetness on sheets and mattresses <br />a picture of you is a reflection of madness <br /><br />and the night time screaming dreaming haunts replaying memories once burned and forgot...<br /><br />And yeah... I've lived... I've cried...<br /> <br />So now I leave all my good thoughts to die in the compost pile of forgotten smiles and still I stand...<br /><br />Waiting for someone to help me understand <br />is there really no justice? no holy reprimand? <br /><br />by painting loosely framed pictures from "truth" derived from scripture <br />when there's a living beast inside of me feeding quicker <br />I need to breathe so I chose the lesser of two evils... <br />Egotistical... or the flesh and blood of His stolen steeple...<br /><br />c'mon people lets welcome the reaper <br />and stand fast with hearts at half mast <br />take all of the blind faithless to task <br />and remember what we came for... <br /><br />Seek a little truth through metaphor and inspire, <br />climb high and aspire to new heights and retire <br />when our hearts of fire grow heavy with time and make ready... <br /><br />For unchartered waters through deep seas of blind imagining and let your soul sing...<br /><br />So yeah... I've sinned... And I breathe...<br /><br />As I leave all my thoughts to grieve in a compost pile of deep imagining and still I stand... Still I sing...<div class="blogger-post-footer"><img width='1' height='1' src='https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/tracker/2230158599538877019-8516336094485768062?l=chaoticvirgo.blogspot.com' alt='' /></div><img src="http://feeds.feedburner.com/~r/chaoticvirgo/~4/zkfJN9ojzhU" height="1" width="1"/>Asa Williamshttp://www.blogger.com/profile/01154787965917567610noreply@blogger.com0http://chaoticvirgo.blogspot.com/2010/11/beauty-in-death.htmltag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2230158599538877019.post-53145723004364740652010-11-11T10:44:00.000-08:002010-11-11T10:46:05.895-08:002010-11-11T10:46:05.895-08:00<a onblur="try {parent.deselectBloggerImageGracefully();} catch(e) {}" href="http://farm1.static.flickr.com/17/92586178_c11f18aa48_z.jpg?zz=1"><img style="display:block; margin:0px auto 10px; text-align:center;cursor:pointer; cursor:hand;width: 640px; height: 564px;" src="http://farm1.static.flickr.com/17/92586178_c11f18aa48_z.jpg?zz=1" border="0" alt="" /></a><br /><br /><br />How does one ever begin to convey the feelings of loss of destruction today... <br /><br />I've leapt I've dived I've ripped my heart out and died <br />for the feeling of dismissal the indifferent missile like deaths razor sharp sickle <br />I don’t understand all the needless reprimand <br />or how you can stand to walk off with a man <br /><br />knowing I'm held back holding out son as a ward against attack... <br />It’s the truth... A cold honest fact... <br />That between me and you I've got it good I've got it bad... <br />Jealous beyond the boundaries of demands... <br /><br />No ring on your finger... No truth to my promise... <br />I just thought after it all you'd be honest <br />but I cannot expect, demand, or regard <br />The flawed nature of your being walking the side of the boulevard. <br /><br />Because really? What the fuck did I do?... <br />Other than swallow the jagged pill stand up and stay true... <br />What did I do beside give my life to you? <br /><br />This is all just a dream a fucking nightmare... <br />The image of you and of her... I need to repair... <br />I'm lost on my own... And you control my spirit <br />wake me when my good deeds suddenly have merit... <br />Cant stand but to share it I tried not to scare it... <br />Just stood, gritted my teeth and bared it... <br />I'd like to let it all loose... But I choose to despair it... <br />After the facts too late don’t know if I can mirror it... <br /><br />I fear all of it but sit back and quit <br />the rise of the tide inside my minds jealous side.... <br />Because I don’t have the right no engagement in sight... <br />I'm a fucking donor... The creator of life but in life there are 23 chromosomes pushed to the side... <br /><br />This ride goes on too long for me to just hide... <br />Set me on a path of unforgiving mass... I traveled down at last after your time came to pass... <br /><br />And don’t hear me... <br /><br />Oh no whatever you do don’t hear me... <br /><br />Let me be the whispers that gnaw at your pride <br />let me be the reason you stood up and lied <br />let me be the tears that fell when you cried <br />and let me be the knife for a life of suicide...<div class="blogger-post-footer"><img width='1' height='1' src='https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/tracker/2230158599538877019-5314572300436474065?l=chaoticvirgo.blogspot.com' alt='' /></div><img src="http://feeds.feedburner.com/~r/chaoticvirgo/~4/vGG1vnt7Kv8" height="1" width="1"/>Asa Williamshttp://www.blogger.com/profile/01154787965917567610noreply@blogger.com0http://chaoticvirgo.blogspot.com/2010/11/what-did-i-do.htmltag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2230158599538877019.post-40502754442411069112010-10-08T13:14:00.000-07:002010-10-08T13:18:15.552-07:002010-10-08T13:18:15.552-07:00<a onblur="try {parent.deselectBloggerImageGracefully();} catch(e) {}" href="http://www.thewallpapers.org/photo/24802/nightmare-on-elm-street-020.jpg"><img style="display:block; margin:0px auto 10px; text-align:center;cursor:pointer; cursor:hand;width: 1920px; height: 1200px;" src="http://www.thewallpapers.org/photo/24802/nightmare-on-elm-street-020.jpg" border="0" alt="" /></a><br /><br />Some times I feel taken for granted <br />which I guess is the cost of being a hopeless romantic <br />I get frantic at the thought of us creating static <br />or making a bad habit out of the emotionally tragic <br /><br />its sad to last this long and go down with out a fight <br />years of loving you... All destroyed in one night... <br />Two souls in a hurricane stumbling forward just to get blown back <br />and it’s a fact that the passion we had could last all night <br />just to wake in the morning and it go out like a light. <br />In my mind we are two halves of the same dime <br />tight rope walking along the edges of both lines <br />coin flipping to mirror the image of same sides… <br />indifferent whispers of "yes love… its fine" <br /><br />I can't take this stress... this cold heartedness... <br />the push back of black indifference has me vexed <br />beyond imagining white flags and black gag's keep the soul from singing <br />wake me demon I'm sure my love is dreaming <br />comatose romance silently screaming <br />out to you echoing along the edges of NOT-A-DAMN THING <br />but me heavily breathing... <br /><br />The resentment is evident displaying a prevalence of silent nights like Christmas <br />how long before one of us says we're not with it? Walk away now forget this... lets end this quick <br />before its too late to accept this... <br /><br />Its not fair. Its not right. To keep these kids awake all night... <br />wishing for a band aid for the heart… <br />so they can repair the damage before it all falls apart… <br />isn't it funny… how a in the mind of a child… <br />the thoughts are powerful and yet so wild <br />a band aid fixes everything… <br />peroxide and gauze <br />a quick kiss to move on with just cause... <br />or maybe we could all walk it off… eat a little ice cream. That'll fix everything... <br /><br />right daddy?... Right daddy? right... daddy….?... <br /><br />Wild minds slip off to bleak dream rocked to sleep by broken glass, love lost, and screaming...<div class="blogger-post-footer"><img width='1' height='1' src='https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/tracker/2230158599538877019-4050275444241106911?l=chaoticvirgo.blogspot.com' alt='' /></div><img src="http://feeds.feedburner.com/~r/chaoticvirgo/~4/sdKF6-iQ7vE" height="1" width="1"/>Asa Williamshttp://www.blogger.com/profile/01154787965917567610noreply@blogger.com0http://chaoticvirgo.blogspot.com/2010/10/band-aids-for-heart.htmltag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2230158599538877019.post-48450508841024153532010-09-20T10:30:00.000-07:002010-09-20T10:32:25.064-07:002010-09-20T10:32:25.064-07:00<a onblur="try {parent.deselectBloggerImageGracefully();} catch(e) {}" href="http://www.deviantart.com/download/139530741/Coffee_and_Blood_Stains_by_SpookyChan.jpg"><img style="display:block; margin:0px auto 10px; text-align:center;cursor:pointer; cursor:hand;width: 333px; height: 511px;" src="http://www.deviantart.com/download/139530741/Coffee_and_Blood_Stains_by_SpookyChan.jpg" border="0" alt="" /></a><br /><br /><br /><br /><br />Another day to make shame fade before day… <br /><br />the light shines a little brighter but is it enough to ease the suffering from past mishaps and shitty circumstance? <br /><br />Time my only friend now... letting the embers die and the passion cool... the memories fade as new news, new drama, and busy bee blunders of the human race continue to ebb away at my own misfortune... <br /><br />My eye lids close to the still dark shadows of my thoughts as they tumble across my heart like crowns of thorns... blowing breezily across the icy remains of my good intentions. Sinful living grinding like gravel across any vision I had of simple living...<br /><br />Blinding me to the reality of my own personal tragedy... a book I write myself... a mental diatribe I'm living by right now... <br /><br />how utterly ironic how an intelligent chaotic destroys himself with the neurotic impulses of an insecure heart… <br /><br />...didn't I listen? Haven't I studied?...<br /><br />...Should I not understand the suffering I place myself in... <br /><br />remove the mask of the executioner only to discover the task was dealt by my hands gazing at the mirror of past I see the missteps I chose to take off the path… <br /><br />why do I understand but tap out to the pain, the anger, the shifting rage of my turned over page… is it not the same as the teachings that god gave... <br /><br />...I'm a hypocrite... <br /><br />...self sacrifice on the alter of ego I hurt... <br /><br />...But... Destroy... Only... Me... <br /><br />tearing out my own heart I place it on top of old photos, dusty memories, and forgotten storm clouds the haze of the profound obscures my hindsight like ear plugs for sound. <br /><br />Cold empty nothing in the pit of my stomach... something lingers in the chilly night time... wanting to tear my sanity away from me... <br /><br />Mistakes to make a martyr of good intentions for the sake of fate I won't try and relate to suicidal bait but I just can't shake it... <br /><br />These feelings of regret, of remorse, of recourse for another morsel of smiles faked and forced... My Pen Drippings Dipped In Blood beating its last course as I write the words dressed in red... <br /><br />...And I'm Sorry... <br /><br />...I'm Sorry... <br /><br />...I'm Sorry...<div class="blogger-post-footer"><img width='1' height='1' src='https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/tracker/2230158599538877019-4845050884102415353?l=chaoticvirgo.blogspot.com' alt='' /></div><img src="http://feeds.feedburner.com/~r/chaoticvirgo/~4/RW87XlfLH98" height="1" width="1"/>Asa Williamshttp://www.blogger.com/profile/01154787965917567610noreply@blogger.com0http://chaoticvirgo.blogspot.com/2010/09/my-pen-drippings-im-sorry.htmltag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2230158599538877019.post-28779060334573114472010-09-03T12:13:00.000-07:002010-09-03T12:14:20.335-07:002010-09-03T12:14:20.335-07:00I'm unapproachable, mentally poached, get coached or get run over by my metaphorical roller coaster<br /><br /> like burnt toast I'm as dry as Arizona coast, while Quenching the Thirst of Life like rope around a throat and no I won’t choke I go for broke by picking a fight with the written language exacerbating my Problems in Pronunciation <br /><br />bitch this wasn't a misprint!<br /><br />just A Whole Bag of Swagg for an entire nation... This is my proclamation... I'm makin'... like a remote control... I'm changin' stations… turn up the volume just to hear you hatin'... I'm on Top Of Reality Mountain... you bitches free basin'... <br /><br />and I don't know what you may have heard about me... but I'm Swinging on an Empty Vine within' the bowels of my insanity <br /><br />by Singing with the Wind to the beat of my personal history... By allowing my purpose to be a Burmuda Try-Angle design that I can never see <br /><br />because I'm like A Heart without Blood a beat with no future my lines remain a testament to nature over nurture<br /><br />I maintain my hatred of all Saints of Sin... profit from the living while still expectin' heaven… just Another Sexual Perspective... a perversion of the eclectic... I can't believe they let them... get away with their moletestin... leaving me second guessin these holy water blessin's... leaving me to question these red lettered lessons...<br /><br />...This is the part where my thoughts break down... left to rot in silence when no one else is around... let me fill the void of your soul like circus clowns… when they are Up To No Good…<br /><br />Don’t fuck with me I'm psycho... performing drive by's on unicycles while drinking Nyquil... that’s just how I roll... and when I lose control... Chinese calculus couldn’t calculate the death toll... and even though revenge is a dish best served cold... its my greatest wish to give it back to you 10 fold <br /><br />I attack you with a metaphor... in order to defeat you in my school of thought... I'd start with the ABC's and move on to building blocks... psychopathic criminal bombing preschools of rot taking out all of you sitting under one roof you got caught <br /><br />just calm down… <br /><br />and give my lines a fair shot to make your body rock... <br /><br />like a lyrical dragon spittin fire hotter than wasabi sauce... I'll send you your w2... Mother fucker I'M the boss that you wouldn't wanna cross... and if you think you might get sick… just take your lip from the end of my bic and GET OFF<div class="blogger-post-footer"><img width='1' height='1' src='https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/tracker/2230158599538877019-2877906033457311447?l=chaoticvirgo.blogspot.com' alt='' /></div><img src="http://feeds.feedburner.com/~r/chaoticvirgo/~4/ilCscynY-QQ" height="1" width="1"/>Asa Williamshttp://www.blogger.com/profile/01154787965917567610noreply@blogger.com0http://chaoticvirgo.blogspot.com/2010/09/get-off.htmltag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2230158599538877019.post-44273925254138300952010-08-09T08:55:00.000-07:002010-08-09T09:01:03.312-07:002010-08-09T09:01:03.312-07:00A new page a new day new rage we gotta pay attention and listen to all the bitchin and moanin of announcers on radio shows dictating how my morning goes… drink some coffee to drown my woes im in the throws of those that just don’t know how real life goes... So here we go... A little bit of truth in a cup no sugar and no creamer here is a story of how I used to be an American dreamer... <br /><br />Trapped in the bracket of 30 to 50k attacks too little to be ok… too much to for a stimulus package… I'm trapped in mediocrity... Traffic got me savagely pursuing dreams not based upon reality... <br /><br />Thank you government for making this a great time to get fired... I should expire my career and retire... Maybe I should flash my dick at my boss real quick watch him shit a brick of money right before he fires me yeah that’s funny... Coast on unemployment... For 6 months all the while someone else foots the bill for my life style ... Sit back and smile... They gonna extend my benefits for an extra few miles as I pretend to get a job online yeah I could do that and be fine... As American's drink the blood of their work force like wine... I worked hard and got a raise but when it came time to get paid I made less cash after the government came... Because ... <br /><br />I'm trapped in the bracket of 30 to 50k attacks too little to be ok… too much to for a stimulus package… I'm trapped in mediocrity... Traffic got me savagely pursuing dreams not based upon reality... <br /><br />Maybe I can sling rock on the street to make ends meet give my kids some socks and keep new shoes on their feet... Many consider this thought for the weak... But those mother fuckers don't live in my reality. A single father family you can't fathom my catastrophe I'm resigned to be and designed to be... Diligent. Finger prints on blue prints planning my next trip to wic praying to God I don’t get sick because one little slip and that’s the end of it precariously balanced on the edge of the economy existing in a nation of dichotomy... Because... <br /><br />I'm trapped in the bracket of 30 to 50k attacks too little to be ok… too much to for a stimulus package… I'm trapped in mediocrity... Traffic got me savagely pursuing dreams not based upon reality...<div class="blogger-post-footer"><img width='1' height='1' src='https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/tracker/2230158599538877019-4427392525413830095?l=chaoticvirgo.blogspot.com' alt='' /></div><img src="http://feeds.feedburner.com/~r/chaoticvirgo/~4/U4FPVuP-5w0" height="1" width="1"/>Asa Williamshttp://www.blogger.com/profile/01154787965917567610noreply@blogger.com0http://chaoticvirgo.blogspot.com/2010/08/american-dreamer.htmltag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2230158599538877019.post-48289636390047523712010-07-27T08:41:00.000-07:002010-07-27T08:44:41.404-07:002010-07-27T08:44:41.404-07:00<a onblur="try {parent.deselectBloggerImageGracefully();} catch(e) {}" href="http://farm3.static.flickr.com/2634/3875498804_002a8d4043.jpg"><img style="display:block; margin:0px auto 10px; text-align:center;cursor:pointer; cursor:hand;width: 485px; height: 500px;" src="http://farm3.static.flickr.com/2634/3875498804_002a8d4043.jpg" border="0" alt="" /></a><br /><br /><br />Tired of my pen being corrupted in the name of egoic pride <br />I choose to survive by the vibes that I live by <br />inside of my mind I deliver my word in good time <br /><br />and normally... <br /><br />it comes out just fine… <br />but lately… <br />things have been a little less saintly... <br /><br />and all my castles crumbled on wet ink, <br />painting pictures as shattered dreams escape me <br /><br />silent screams of misery take me to new designs of cryptic creating that mirror the same things depicted when making an ass of yourself while doing great things... <br /><br />Cuz you see... <br /><br />I've walked down the road of good intentions only to receive a rash from the back lash of self righteous indignation coming to task on my ass... <br /><br />Haha "Pride" it seems... Is still a 'lie' I can't 'truth' away... <br /><br />Still a beast I struggle to keep caged as it feasts on the morality that god gave... <br /><br />Why I gotta be better? <br />When I was just fine before I had you to compare... <br />How is my work less polished? <br />How is my shine a little dimmer? <br /><br />When I was at my best when I was by myself, <br /><br />spinning in black holes <br />grinning at death like we just met and... <br />sinning my life away... <br /><br />On that slip and slide of life with two kaleidoscopes over my eyes pressed tight... <br /><br />(As I am the observer of beautiful forms...) <br /><br />My binoculars to another world sliding at night... Faster and faster... Feel wet water and sun light <br /><br />licking my senses as I pass from one world to the next... <br /><br />...With a grin on my face... <br /><br />How's that taste? <br /><br />As I grant you images of Denis the Menace's sliding and slipping along your senses with thought forms and sentences... <br /><br />Collide-OH-scoping 2 worlds eloping when you join me on my journey of me... <br /><br />...Just for a little while we can be free... <br />...But only a moment and no more... <br /><br />The journey down my slip and slide can leave your ass sore <br />as you bump and bounce and slide some more... <br /><br />Down the path that isn't yours... Until you collide with an onyx door... <br /><br />Can you survive my metaphor? Good. Because the ride has come to an end and you are faced with a choice my friends... <br /><br />Open... Or ...Go <br /><br />we all come to the clearing at the end of the path the ride was fun but could not last as all of our scars are windows to past until we are transparent incased in glass... <br /><br />Even the clearing is fun for awhile <br />replaying dreams to remember and smile <br /><br />but sooner or later we come to the choice... <br />Fade to nothing a dream on your voice... <br /><br />...or erase the past... <br /><br />...Enter... <br /><br />...and... <br /><br />.............................................................................................................................................<div class="blogger-post-footer"><img width='1' height='1' src='https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/tracker/2230158599538877019-4828963639004752371?l=chaoticvirgo.blogspot.com' alt='' /></div><img src="http://feeds.feedburner.com/~r/chaoticvirgo/~4/fp6wGTbC24M" height="1" width="1"/>Asa Williamshttp://www.blogger.com/profile/01154787965917567610noreply@blogger.com0http://chaoticvirgo.blogspot.com/2010/07/egoic-kaleidoscope.htmltag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2230158599538877019.post-24142746502407456502010-07-27T08:40:00.000-07:002010-07-27T08:41:24.580-07:002010-07-27T08:41:24.580-07:00I won't spend long on the haters I already got your bodies stacked up cuz you got smacked up and cracked the fuck up I car jacked ya while you were dyin' in an ambulance yeah I was that bad to ya <br /><br />I passed ya like we was playin pole position you get a few stars but im a fuckin' solar system so bitch listen <br /><br />I'm stephen hawking and this is my theory of rhythmic musing this is my mission in an alphabet of my choosing I'm abusing the right to free speech I speak volumes of truth for those who seek, who breathe, who live to achieve the right to be free or just individually BE <br /><br />....|||| .... <br /><br />imagine you’re a robber on a snatch and grab and I'm the father with 3 kids and a glad bag I slide it over your black mask and have you gasp and grab at my hand wont leave it to the courts for a reprimand and have you released to plan another attack on true American's fuck the terrorists in Afghanistan we got killers right here in our "Promised" lands you understand? Got Damn <br /><br />....|||| .... <br /><br />Or think about the little boys growing up in convents and used like little toys thinking it was God's choice coming from the voice of those vigorously employed by the sinless steeple of God's chosen people the keepers of evil the deceiver of believers wearing black sleepers and bleached collars imprisoned to your old bitch your DOG-ma as you touch and corrupt imposing as a father to the bastard children of God's followers... <br /><br />And GOVERNMENT how the fuck did they go without punishment? And no one stopped to throw a fit? Just move them to a secluded convent and that’s the end of it? Hahaha ya'll mutha fuckas a trip... But you can still get bent or get bit by the poisonous tip of my pen and eat shit with a shovel right before I use it to bury the corruptible <br /><br />....||||.... <br /><br />What? Did what I say stir up trouble, burst your bubble, leave your beliefs swimming in rubble? Look in my eyes with your hand out see if I give a shit... I meant every bit of it just give me the pro-molesting side of the argument and I'll quit… let you have your 2 cents to vent as I place pennies over your lids to pay the boat man his tip for the long trip to Hades live in flame after you make like Kirk Kobain and drain all of your life away... what the fuck else can I say??... <br /><br />hahahaha<div class="blogger-post-footer"><img width='1' height='1' src='https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/tracker/2230158599538877019-2414274650240745650?l=chaoticvirgo.blogspot.com' alt='' /></div><img src="http://feeds.feedburner.com/~r/chaoticvirgo/~4/gIo91phdiBg" height="1" width="1"/>Asa Williamshttp://www.blogger.com/profile/01154787965917567610noreply@blogger.com0http://chaoticvirgo.blogspot.com/2010/07/biblical-rape-what-can-i-say.htmltag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2230158599538877019.post-3865792254179436082010-07-09T08:54:00.002-07:002010-07-09T08:55:28.111-07:002010-07-09T08:55:28.111-07:00Redemption for the ignorant I wouldn’t have spent one minute on this shit without knowing my need to repent the nonsense and dis-spell the bulshyt <br /><br />because if my pen doesn’t ring true to me then I'm through with poetry cant coach me or approach me to pen out scribes laced with lies when my ink writes from deep inside of me... <br /><br />A mirror pool of pain reflecting my mind in vain knowing you wouldn’t listen but it’s all the same as my thoughts are still pretending there is a line between sinful living and the scribes I keep on penning... <br /><br />There is no winning, no reward, no prize that g's is giving just a free piece of me served in a three piece on sheets of bloodied paper dressed to kill stressed I will instill the aroma of truth like pills for a coma <br /><br />I got my diploma in free speech a graduate of misery, heart break, and infamy... hatred don't speak to me... let me be free in formless seas as I breathe... <br /><br />as I breathe... <br /><br />and I breathe deep the imagining and I sing to the holy trinity as if it were a part of me... Even though its apart from me... I start to see... <br /><br />the benefits of a truth in ignorance... <br /><br />A painted picture for the blind to read in scripture a fixture to see the truth inside of fiction but the definition is lacking the essence of expression giving the impression that your beliefs need direction when this is all just an infection of madness... <br /><br />An ignorant truth to keep the sheep from sadness as they walk down their paths to salvation a nation with a bad habit needing a middle man to help them understand it <br /><br />but the price of a souls inflation can be measured by a societies degradation as the broker fees for your sinful needs break the bonds of infamy and rest squarely on the devils knees as all the believers are receivers of a spanking... <br /><br />Who dies without regret? Who passes without remorse? Who follows their course without eating more than their 4 courses with reasonable recourse? <br /><br />Painted pictures finding loop holes in nature if you can't read it why not fake it?... I'd rather take the bull by the horns and remake it and fuck money... I'd rather be funny and imagine the devil as a fat bunny... <br /><br />Hell... since we're finger painting why make Satan the essence of hatred? Why not rainbows, and pots of gold, women only 18 years old, and fresh beer that’s cold... As long as you're painting pictures... why not be bold?<div class="blogger-post-footer"><img width='1' height='1' src='https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/tracker/2230158599538877019-386579225417943608?l=chaoticvirgo.blogspot.com' alt='' /></div><img src="http://feeds.feedburner.com/~r/chaoticvirgo/~4/vuL8w_tT4WM" height="1" width="1"/>Asa Williamshttp://www.blogger.com/profile/01154787965917567610noreply@blogger.com0http://chaoticvirgo.blogspot.com/2010/07/painting-pictures.htmltag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2230158599538877019.post-65538159534717599952010-07-09T08:54:00.001-07:002010-07-09T08:54:34.840-07:002010-07-09T08:54:34.840-07:00Like a frozen turd you heard bitch this 'shit is cold'... <br /><br />a little more metaphor I found my pen heartless in a blizzard and left butt naked by an ice wizard killed by chillie willie and raped by Jack Frost without a condom on with a prosthetic pair of witches titties strapped on this shit is long gone its way passed wrong… if wrong was a flavor of ice cream served in Antarctica... <br /><br />that fly girl that just wont talk wit ya… <br /><br />bitch you better have a slick wit or this pen is comin' to stick it in ya mind bend ya over and over again my lines spin ya <br /><br />like cocaine in your brain my self proclaimed prophecy to blame when you were here in name only <br /><br />a poetic phony, a fraudulent fake, a photoshoped copy you tried to be but you're NOT me and if you don't like me then bitch DROP me <br /><br />hit the ignore button or somethin' move on gruntin' im stuntin' with my slick bic roller ballin' killin' all of ya'll like the boulder from Indiana Jones its over… or maybe just O-V because you'll be in E-R when I come through slowly flattening your lines with mine <br /><br />your rhymes were straight laced I'm pennin' mace to your face you cant see me or taste the motha fuckin' flavor now make haste with your alphabet waste or you gonna be late to the onyx gates of hate <br /><br />There's just no stoppin' me... <br /><br />Pennin' off the top of my rock I wont stop to unblock your cock from Tu Pac's HIPs and definitely not the HOP as all you bunny rabbits start a bad habit out of eatin' carrots from the claws of a predator... <br /><br />I'm el matador of this experiment killin syllaBULLs and BULLshit ill never quit when this worlds so full of hypocrites and I'll be the first to admit this is ignorant but the intelligent shit just wasn’t a fit for this chick I'm pissed... <br /><br />just don’t start somethin' bitch if you ain't prepared to finish it. <br /><br />I'm about to do the flutterwagon on your ass I'm Mad Hatter... I had her...you're in wonderland and how sad...Cuz Realities gonna sting when it crash lands on your ass and I'm glad... open up your blind eyes to an understanding you never had and how is a raven like my pen hand you ask? I put a little Poe in my poetry you've been had... <br /><br />I'm a riddler with no answer the word dancer I hurt slow but bitch I write faster my stanzas are so fuckin' bad they cause cancer be careful the surgeon generals comin' hear that snare drummin'? better start runnin' I just don’t care cousin... Leave me with nothing and I still got more than a pair of you fuckin' dirty bakers dozens <br /><br />You fakers wasn't makin' nothin' of a difference until I take your sentence and subtract the facts from your tracks you got catarax if you think you'll see me lookin back at ya I'll eat your lies and spit it back at ya scribble out the truth and bitch slap ya while im in a straight jacket im the insane mack attack on the comeback from flack and you spit whack shit. <br /><br />But let me redeem me with a little post script to my floetry... My ignorance in motion to calm loving oceans and seas of deep imagining I breathe... And I breathe... And I breathe... <br /><br />To Be Continued....<div class="blogger-post-footer"><img width='1' height='1' src='https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/tracker/2230158599538877019-6553815953471759995?l=chaoticvirgo.blogspot.com' alt='' /></div><img src="http://feeds.feedburner.com/~r/chaoticvirgo/~4/sEWx91mK-R8" height="1" width="1"/>Asa Williamshttp://www.blogger.com/profile/01154787965917567610noreply@blogger.com0http://chaoticvirgo.blogspot.com/2010/07/i-speak-evil-lyrical-ignorance-part-iii.htmltag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2230158599538877019.post-6131461222177482282010-06-29T14:28:00.000-07:002010-06-29T14:29:02.666-07:002010-06-29T14:29:02.666-07:00I'm tired of all of these pussy poet queefs <br />who think the shit that comes outta their mouths don’t stink <br />when your pen is weak <br />don't call that ink <br />just turn the other cheek and leave <br />be diseased and DIE SLOW <br /><br />your words won't blow <br />you just don’t know <br />what it takes to show <br />a little fuckin integrity <br /><br />ill shit on you haters <br />like butt sex while you're constipated <br />you'll never make it… <br />I fucked these pages young like Kobe <br /><br />ain't heard of me yet <br />but goddamn it you'll know me <br />before this pen gets old and out grows me <br />I'll infect you bitches like STD's then make your wife blow me! <br /><br />My inks run cold B <br />don’t pretend that you know me <br />I'm off my rocker... <br />fucked up enough to give your grandmamma the shocka <br /><br />like cocaine and baking soda I'll rock ya <br />you'll need the spirit of god to keep me off ya <br />CV so alphabetically improper <br />writing stanzas ill sing my ABS's to the rhythms of me stompin ya, <br /><br />A to the face <br />B another taste <br />C will erase <br /><br />any memories of you dissin me… <br />one erotic drop and you wont stop kissin me… <br />reprogram your thoughts to walk and talk like an agnostic Tupac in anarchy… <br /><br />I'll have you writin for me <br />my zombies of me on strings <br />you wont breathe when you leaves g's <br />to be free from me or maybe... <br /><br />you were just a little too quick to pen… <br />think quick or your shit might get kicked again <br />stay the fuck off my dick and then <br />there's a possibility that we can be friends again... <br /><br />as soon as you clean up my rubble <br />remove the hair from your knuckles <br />stand up straight pull your pants up and buckle <br />walk off this beating and stay the fuck outta trouble. <br /><br />With every word I write you force my pen... <br /><br />I feel so unevolved <br />nothing can be resolved <br />when I write so uninvolved <br />with the problems in life that I caused… <br /><br />make no mistake there is no right here… only wrong... this ink forces my spirit to grieve and leave and now... <br /><br />...long gone...<div class="blogger-post-footer"><img width='1' height='1' src='https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/tracker/2230158599538877019-613146122217748228?l=chaoticvirgo.blogspot.com' alt='' /></div><img src="http://feeds.feedburner.com/~r/chaoticvirgo/~4/aJIyOgfj_EM" height="1" width="1"/>Asa Williamshttp://www.blogger.com/profile/01154787965917567610noreply@blogger.com0http://chaoticvirgo.blogspot.com/2010/06/reflecting-anger-lyrical-ignorance-part.htmltag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2230158599538877019.post-32173930288507766892010-06-29T14:27:00.000-07:002010-06-29T14:28:07.718-07:002010-06-29T14:28:07.718-07:00Am I diseased? <br />Am I sick softened by wanting so often? <br />A deviant... <br />A sick trick <br />who needs to get over it <br />And change… <br />made lame by playing a never ending game of shame <br /><br />Disappointment the ointment <br />that greases the wheels <br />of a truck load of broken hearts <br />tear me apart from your silence <br />or roll over in violence and dream on… <br /><br />No denying the passion is gone <br />how can I be wrong <br />when its been so long since... We kissed <br />With any deliverance of flame... <br />touch being taken out of context <br />as you place blame <br />together in name <br />it'll never be the same as the time <br />I looked into your eyes <br />and saw the world laid before me <br />and the pain of the road left behind me <br />a contrast that didn’t last <br />a promise that time tested <br />and failed to pass <br />this shit went by way too fast <br />how can I say this you ask? <br />When the best sex we ever had <br />was on broken glass... <br />Don’t be crass <br />I'll go 50/50 on your ass and split it <br />what would make you think that I was good with it? <br /><br />Displaying lethargy no passion ... <br /><br />I panic... go schizophrenic … Laura Marling, I'm manic & 'I' just can't stand it but I really gotta hand it to you I won't demand it and you know I gotta have it I'm an attic to this static take me to rehab to keep me outta those pants... <br /><br />but sometimes this shit is whack… <br /><br />Gotta put my name tat on your back and do me... <br /><br />Its Just. <br />Too much. <br />For us. <br />To let. <br />This trust. <br />Go bust. <br />We must. <br />Give up. <br />Enough. <br />Of us. <br />To let. <br />Our love. <br />Rise above. <br />This lust. <br />And be free…<div class="blogger-post-footer"><img width='1' height='1' src='https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/tracker/2230158599538877019-3217393028850776689?l=chaoticvirgo.blogspot.com' alt='' /></div><img src="http://feeds.feedburner.com/~r/chaoticvirgo/~4/ZIlspCG5INs" height="1" width="1"/>Asa Williamshttp://www.blogger.com/profile/01154787965917567610noreply@blogger.com0http://chaoticvirgo.blogspot.com/2010/06/sexually-addicted-to-you.htmltag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2230158599538877019.post-11649729644062316462010-06-18T12:38:00.000-07:002010-06-18T12:42:27.589-07:002010-06-18T12:42:27.589-07:00<a href="http://i1015.photobucket.com/albums/af274/city18_album/c2m3_coaster0001.jpg"><img style="display:block; margin:0px auto 10px; text-align:center;cursor:pointer; cursor:hand;width: 1024px; height: 819px;" src="http://i1015.photobucket.com/albums/af274/city18_album/c2m3_coaster0001.jpg" border="0" alt="" /></a><br /><br />We are all so concerned over effect instead of the cause <br />Why face our demons when we can blame it on god? <br />He killed my brother just to test my faith <br />Lets recoil from the truth before its too late... <br /><br />Rescinding to dream I scream for a reality without cream <br />Without the need for greed just the ability to feed my seed <br />I chose a design that's mine to see a picture looked on blindly <br />And it works just fine for me, with versatility I see that we will never be free <br />From thought based realities intertwined within infinities <br /><br />And from the corners of my mind marked by slit wrists... <br />I will break through the borders of my thoughts like split wigs <br /><br />From the scars imprinted upon my heart like war paint <br />I thought I could deliver myself from reason but no I can't <br /><br />The truth… as it is seen… is too tasty to let my heart leave <br />The safety net of my reasoning into the formless mix of my inner being <br /><br />I look beyond… but is seeing really believing? <br />Or just more lies to wake up from... Dreaming <br />My near sighted eyes shut tight to see 20/20 <br />envisioning love instead of money I find it funny <br />that in the shadows of my minds most abysmal failings… <br />I never see the lack in the wake of life... Trailing <br />Behind me like a white flag screaming "catch me to enslave me..." <br />these thought forms were sent to fake and remake me… <br />separate me… from the clarity I once knew as a baby... Its crazy <br />How even as a child I knew no angel would save me <br />Just more demons in thought forms I've created <br />An egoic nature and a failure to escape them <br />A human existence with a soul for the raping <br /><br />The ride goes on… but somebody take me <br />Off of this roller coaster holocaust <br />on a one way track but still I'm lost <br />Within shinning smiles of lies embossed <br />upon a society of criss crossed Christians enduring sinful living <br />on public access stations aired across nations… <br /><br />promoting a saint wearing gold paint <br />on gold chains emboldened to flame <br />our true god becomes gold idols on coffee tables <br />and choking the necks of false profits… <br />ignorant gods living in madness <br />trapped within the daily habit of daily sadness <br />and I've been on the ride too long… <br /><br />I can't stand this… <br /><br />it was fun for awhile so exciting I smiled until tired... <br />Someone stop the ride I tried to hang on to long... <br />I'm spiritually fried inside of my mind <br /><br />I cried out to you... but I Heard... Only... Me... <br /><br />I'm free! From thought based realities, disease, and the desire to be free... <br />From running thoughts resembling dark rushing seas of brief reprieves... <br />No longer will I suffer the indignity of your holy trinity <br /><br />when the result is forcing me to be... <br /><br />Good like you... <br />Or bad like me... <br /><br />You See?<div class="blogger-post-footer"><img width='1' height='1' src='https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/tracker/2230158599538877019-1164972964406231646?l=chaoticvirgo.blogspot.com' alt='' /></div><img src="http://feeds.feedburner.com/~r/chaoticvirgo/~4/ye_P9wrBpqA" height="1" width="1"/>Asa Williamshttp://www.blogger.com/profile/01154787965917567610noreply@blogger.com0http://chaoticvirgo.blogspot.com/2010/06/roller-coaster-holocaust.htmltag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2230158599538877019.post-69075212525758683362010-06-14T06:44:00.000-07:002010-06-14T06:48:38.918-07:002010-06-14T06:48:38.918-07:00I drive… do you drive?<br />Hypocrisy runs rampant in lies <br />flying to protests in airplane lined skies <br />how can any of us dare to deny<br />the blames on all our shoulders… <br />we drive and pelicans die... <br />we shed a few tears <br />then off to work we drive to survive. <br />But protesting negligence <br />wont solve any of this shit... <br />You drove to a protest?<br />About oil drilling negligence... Really? <br />That’s like protesting mickie d's <br />for promoting obesity... <br />While eating a big mac double meat <br />and add cheese... Bitch please... <br />How can you bring the sea turtles back <br />with hypocrisy unchecked <br />its not an accusation just cold honest fact... <br />If we didn’t drive then they wouldn’t drill <br />everyone of us is looking for a need to fulfill <br />and some one to pay for it <br />turn me into a slave for pay checks... <br />Stained decks... <br />And houses full of entertainment sets. <br />Rock your children to sleep by the glow of "sin" <br />but instead of S-I-N <br />I spell it C-N-N <br />because where does all of this hatred stem? <br />if not in the subconscious dreams of America's children <br />falling asleep in the arms of frightened citizens <br />while we wage war on domestic terrorism. <br />God Bless America but fuck the government <br />these greasy politicians can suck my fucking dick <br />turn the gulf of Mexico into an oil slick<br />then promote your terror while America is watchin it <br />40 people died by suicide in spite of it <br />this is why we cant deny the lives we forfeited<br />Media promoting to a state of ignorance<br /><br />"GO HOME EVERYONE! AMERICAN IDOL STARTS AT 7PM CENTRAL BE THERE OR BE SQUARE! DON’T WORRY ABOUT THE MAN BEHIND THE CURTAIN HE IS OF NO RELEVANCE TO YOUR INTERNAL HAPPINESS... EAT MCDONALDS... RELAX IN FRONT OF YOUR SETS... RELIEVE YOUR STRESS SO YOU CAN GOTO WORK THE NEXT DAY AT YOUR BEST! THIS COUNTRY CAN'T AFFORD FOR YOU TO MISS A CHECK... WE GOT TERROR TO PROMOTE... AHEM... I MEAN PREVENT...."<div class="blogger-post-footer"><img width='1' height='1' src='https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/tracker/2230158599538877019-6907521252575868336?l=chaoticvirgo.blogspot.com' alt='' /></div><img src="http://feeds.feedburner.com/~r/chaoticvirgo/~4/D8dc0xP8mM4" height="1" width="1"/>Asa Williamshttp://www.blogger.com/profile/01154787965917567610noreply@blogger.com0http://chaoticvirgo.blogspot.com/2010/06/they-called-it-programming-lol.htmltag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2230158599538877019.post-75124100286335686782010-05-28T07:28:00.000-07:002010-05-28T07:32:17.810-07:002010-05-28T07:32:17.810-07:00I dream of a time... <br />I'm free from my mind… <br />since I designed this crime <br />My thoughts are stolen by a rhyme<br /><br />Just a test of my testament... <br />sooo arrest me bitch... <br />you can't do nothing since<br />I came to flame I climbed the fence <br /><br />Black walls are slowly closing in... <br />that’s the way with sin... <br />I struggle to get over them <br />inside my mind I never win cause<br /><br />Forgiveness is for the weak... <br />Relive this for my sweet... <br />nightmare only stares <br />still stuck on a losin' streak<br /><br />Damn you for how you treated me <br />I only came to see... <br />that the very air you breath <br />is polluted with the taste of me<br /><br />Now get the fuck away from me <br />my killer eyes see everything <br />fuck this stress you gave to me <br />I cant believe you lied to me<br /><br />For all this shit you'll rot in hell <br />for all I'll miss I just won't care <br />even though you were never there <br />the void is felt by a soul laid bare<br /><br />And If the road to hell was paved with good intentions… <br />then I stand in flames after stepping on shitty women<br /><br />And if every cloud has a silver lining <br />then I'm still waiting for my darkest thoughts to start their shining<br /><br />And if there really is a man behind the emerald curtain… <br />I'll hold onto all my prayers until I know what's certain...<div class="blogger-post-footer"><img width='1' height='1' src='https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/tracker/2230158599538877019-7512410028633568678?l=chaoticvirgo.blogspot.com' alt='' /></div><img src="http://feeds.feedburner.com/~r/chaoticvirgo/~4/FxdL_VYkgxY" height="1" width="1"/>Asa Williamshttp://www.blogger.com/profile/01154787965917567610noreply@blogger.com0http://chaoticvirgo.blogspot.com/2010/05/fucked-over.htmltag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2230158599538877019.post-11537647371138765582010-05-19T11:43:00.001-07:002010-05-19T11:43:45.790-07:002010-05-19T11:43:45.790-07:00Paint me a picture…<br />Brush strokes passing consciousness<br />Mental By Ways of dark essence<br />Whispers that meet, converge, that touch<br />Dreaming mind I want you, seek you, hold on to you<br />Far too much…<br />And its such… a pleasure every measure of song <br />Dark rhythms are a treasure that forever my wrongs<br /><br />Just because you were nice to me…<br />Meeting me, greeting me, into your day dreams it was nice to see <br />A being so full of energy wrapped in rhythmic mystery<br />Destroying my sanity with your poetic mastery<br /><br />Laughing as you fed off my heart <br />reached in my soul and tore it apart<br /> Used the remains to wipe blood from your face<br />Then kissed my lips with a lyricists taste<br /><br />Just a picture a reminder to take with you<br />Just an idea for you to contemplate<br />Relive the memory of every mans fate<br />I feel nothing… so I can't call it rape<br /><br />I see the truth in the flames of burning bodies<br />I smell the life as its burned from all society<br />I see the lies etched on smiling faces<br />I taste the pain of the entire congregation<br /><br />But I still don't feel you…<br />I still can't hear you<br />I refuse to kneel to you<br />But still I want to be near you<br />Dear to you, and I fear you too<br /><br />Because the nights get shorter in summer<br />The light that beckons from the love of another<br />Casting my dreams to the seas of the formless<br />Keeping the creators paint in a state of amorphous<br /><br />Erasing the chaste with petrichor taste<br />God bleeds the waste of humanities fate<br />From the tip of my creating pencil<br />Footnotes to Gods notes making shit simple<br /><br />Knowledge only weakens my resolve<br />I revolve around the voices involved<br />Dreaming, Screaming, puzzles unsolved<br />The way these nightmares evolved <br />Expanding to nothing...<br />Demanding of nothing...<br />Understanding leaving me<br />As all of my dreams cast out to formless seas...<div class="blogger-post-footer"><img width='1' height='1' src='https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/tracker/2230158599538877019-1153764737113876558?l=chaoticvirgo.blogspot.com' alt='' /></div><img src="http://feeds.feedburner.com/~r/chaoticvirgo/~4/Y76Ubg_bn2g" height="1" width="1"/>Asa Williamshttp://www.blogger.com/profile/01154787965917567610noreply@blogger.com0http://chaoticvirgo.blogspot.com/2010/05/i-picture-i-cast-away.htmltag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2230158599538877019.post-22636573189123426062010-05-11T08:26:00.000-07:002010-05-11T08:27:18.533-07:002010-05-11T08:27:18.533-07:00I cast stones at myself for doing nothing<br />For wasting my heart, my truth, my madness<br />Late night walks that never ended<br />Wandering mind trailing<br />Footsteps put distance from sadness<br />Tear drops flooding my thoughts<br />Washed away by, solidified by, my trailing mind, I<br />Cry out to darkness… soul sailing on prevailing highs<br />Take my heart I despise the tide rising inside my eyes<br />Set me apart from the light, the warmth, the skies<br />Its sick... this joke… the sunrise so thick with lies<br />Why not destroy slowly, all of this silent knowing<br />Assassins of light, killers of God, forces of slowing<br />Empty bottles and roaches, sin in seamed into wet dreams<br />Subconscious attacks, unperfected devil of honorable metal<br />My soul breathes the exhalation of a killers hesitation<br />Relishing the moment of brief reprieve<br />Walking along shores with darks seas<br />Footprints washed away by a moments hesitation...<div class="blogger-post-footer"><img width='1' height='1' src='https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/tracker/2230158599538877019-2263657318912342606?l=chaoticvirgo.blogspot.com' alt='' /></div><img src="http://feeds.feedburner.com/~r/chaoticvirgo/~4/tTYMuSAdW6c" height="1" width="1"/>Asa Williamshttp://www.blogger.com/profile/01154787965917567610noreply@blogger.com0http://chaoticvirgo.blogspot.com/2010/05/washed-away.html