Charles Stone

14 Questions that Just Might Rock Your World

Thu, 16 May 2013 01:47:44 CDT

I’m half-way through an incredible book called Daring Greatly: How the Courage to Be Vulnerable Transforms the Way We Live, Love, Parent, and Lead by Dr. Brene Brown. I highly recommend it. Her TED talk on this subject has garnered almost 10,000,000 views. She strikes a chord for leaders about risking vulnerability.

As a pastor vulnerability is scary, carries risks, and we must practice care with whom we get deeply vulnerable. Check out my post here on what to look for in safe people.

As risky as it is, Dr. Brown says it’s a key to what she calls wholehearted living, what I’d called a Spirit-filled life. She says we live in a culture of scarcity and poses 14 questions in her book (p. 27) in three categories that caused me to reflect deeply about my family, my ministry, and my world.

I’ve quoted and paraphrased them here.

5 Creativity Busters: What we Do that Stifles Team Creativity

Tue, 14 May 2013 01:33:15 CDT

Brainstorming sessions have become standard fare for ministry teams that seek solution to problems. The two key components are to generate as many ideas as possible and don’t criticize the ideas. These concepts came from Alex Osborne’s book Your Creative Power published in 1948. Since then it’s been common practice to avoid criticizing the ideas in brainstorming sessions. The underlying assumption was that people won’t speak up if they fear criticism.

There’s only problem with this kind of brainstorming is this: it simply doesn’t work.

5 Reasons Why Every Church Needs a Staff-Board Conflict Resolution Strategy

Mon, 13 May 2013 01:16:00 CDT

The board meetings have begun to sour. Increasingly the pastor and his board have heated conversations about the church’s direction. The conflict has bled into every meeting for months. Emotions are running high. Conflict reaches a flash point. There is no written plan on how to deal with it.

What happens? The board either sends the pastor packing or he quits out of frustration.

A rarity? No. Over 1500 pastors are forced from the ministry each month and many more pastors simply quit because they’re broken. Many are pondering leaving right now.

When emotions run rampant among pastors and boards, thoughtfulness seldom prevails. Our emotional brain hijacks our thinking brain.

So what is the solution to this problem? A written, clear, agreed-upon conflict resolution process. Here are 5 reasons your church needs one.

3 Ways to Defeat Leadership Discouragement

Fri, 10 May 2013 01:21:09 CDT

Discouragement comes with the territory for ministry leaders. Unmet goals, putting out fires, staff issues, displeasing people, and general tiredness all contribute to discouragement. When it weighs us down, how can we dig out?

The life of the prophet Elijah gives us hope.

I Kings 18-19 tells the story of his amazing confrontation with the prophets of Baal. The people of Israel had gathered on Mount Carmel along with 450 prophets of Asherah. They set up a sacrifice and the 450 pagan prophets summoned their gods to provide rain. Nothing happened. Then Elijah summoned the one, true God who showed His power by not only consuming the sacrifice but also ending the drought.

You’d think that after God showed up in such a powerful way, twice, that Elijah would be on a spiritual and emotional high. Not so. After these great victories, he ran for his life, thinking he was the only true prophet left. He literally wanted to die. But God did not leave him alone. I Kings 19 explains how he cared for him.

Three lessons stand out about how we can defeat leadership discouragement.

5 Ways to Minimize Ministry Silos

Wed, 08 May 2013 01:13:36 CDT

Patrick Lencioni brought the concept of silos into the leadership conversation with this great book, Silos, Politics, and Turf Wars. Silos occur in organizations and churches when leaders act like their ministry or team is the only one that matters. A silo attitude results in that leader or team only supporting, giving, or attending functions that pertain to them. It can be kill a ministry and result in these problems.

Unhealthy competition
Jealousy
Hurt feelings
Pride
Lack of trust
Fighting over limited resources
Foot dragging
Politics

So how can a leader minimize ministry silos? Below I suggest a key foundation and then 5 pillars to build on that foundation to rid your ministry of silos.

5 Reasons Why Every Pastor Needs a Coach, and Why I’m Getting One

Mon, 06 May 2013 01:00:06 CDT

After 32 years working in a church, I stepped down last year after a fulfilling 7½ year run as a senior pastor in Aurora, IL. This past year I’ve accomplished several things.

Completed a book for Inter-Varsity Press called People-Pleasing Pastors: Avoiding the Pitfalls of Approval Motivate Leadership. It releases in February of 2014.
Almost completed another book on the subject of neuroleadership for Christian leaders (intersects brain-based insights with the Bible).
Created the foundation for my consulting/coaching ministry for pastors.
Formed an animation company called BullsEye Animations.
Traveled to Canada, Haiti, and Mexico to train pastor-leaders.
Preached in several churches.
Almost completed an Executive Masters in the Science of Neuroleadership.

I’ve been busy accomplishing many things, but I’m at a transition point in my life. I want to go back into church ministry as a lead pastor. To help me in this transition, I’ve hired a wonderful Christian coach, Kim Avery, to guide me through the process. I’ve scheduled several phone coaching sessions with her. Here are the five reasons I'm getting a coach this year.

6 Soul Care Essentials for Pastors

Thu, 02 May 2013 01:50:24 CDT

I recently attended a two-day retreat with Keith Meyer sponsored by the Cornerstone Pastor’s Network. Keith is a pastor and author of several books on soul care including one honored in 2010 as one of the five best books for the leader’s inner life, Whole Like Transformation: Becoming the Change Your Church Needs.

Keith challenged us with several great practices to take care of our soul. Here are the top five that grabbed my attention the most.