life of chocolate

unsettled settled

noreply@blogger.com (mountain bound) — Wed, 18 Aug 2010 03:11:00 +0000

summer has flown by... filled with travel and exploration... but dominated by work. i feel drained and detached and secluded from the false warmth of the bubbles in which i once resided.

the driving force for pushing so hard has been hazy and undefined. i knew the force was there but wasn't quite sure what was fueling it. recently i was looking through pictures of travels in the past year or two, realizing the joy and freedom felt on the road. a certain tension built in these moments as i compared the somewhat settled and rooted bubble i'm planted in now with the free and floating path enjoyed on the road.

I've been working for years to feel settled, to grow up, to follow the path that the world around me suggests is best... only to realize that i crave just the opposite. only to realize that these physical walls around me, and the comfort of my home are falsely secure.

and so... i push on, to finish what i started. and along the way i simplify... and then i float wherever the world calls me, that's where i'll go next. it can't come soon enough...

life on the road

noreply@blogger.com (mountain bound) — Wed, 30 Jun 2010 12:10:00 +0000

It's week 5 of being "on the road" - away from home and friends and all that's familiar. the trip to date has been filled with views, vistas, adventure and experiences that i would never have traveling by other means and with others. in the past month i've dipped my toes in the ocean on both sides of the continent and at varying latitudes both in and out of the country. i've hiked, scrambled and strolled up to amazing peaks bearing far reaching vistas, following rocky cairns along slabby granite trails and passing through wildflower meadows, dense forests and clear streams. i've seen waterfalls and ocean waves and tidal flats and dense forests...even immersed myself in the noise of urban landscapes, plus so much more. And considering that, there's still more to come.

Acadia National Park

Canada...

Above: Bay of Fundy, Right: Cape Split
it's been an amazing experience so far in that i've seen and done so much. on one hand, traveling alone is empowering. the freedom to go where you want, when you want and the prospects of seeing so much enthralls and stimulates. traveling alone reinforces the confidence fueled by true independence. it is liberating. And there is a certain rush associated with reaching each new place and space. however, traveling solo is not without its down moments. there are times when i completely forget about the world and am immersed in amazing moments engulfed by a breathtaking landscape. And in those same moments, at times, these feelings of solitary hollowness emerge - where the realization that no one really knows where you are and being without company, no one can really understand the power of that particular experience. so the experience is filed in a little compartment that feeds your ever expanding self to be remembered and absorbed and perhaps shared with others later one via word and image. still it's not the same as sharing that moment.and no one really knows... or understands.

ABOVE: Bay of Fundy
there are other times when you become exceedingly self-aware in a moment of discomfort when things aren't feeling quite right. this could be interactions with others - strange and uncertain, or traversing delicate or precarious landscapes. it is in these moments, exacerbated by being female in the company of strange men, that your own vulnerability and mortality smacks you in the face and you are as alert and on edge as you can possibly be. however, as uncomfortable as these adrenaline filled moments are, i'm not sure i'd trade them in for a less engaging and more conservative experience.

Left: Scotts Bay; Right: Duncans Cove / Chebucto Head
i've certainly learned a lot on this trip. both professionally working with and processing my data - day and night, and personally just me and my pup, traveling here and there without a solid plan, living out of my car, eating cold food, wondering where i may wake up next. it's been exciting. this may be all the data processing talking but admittedly i'm feeling a bit tired. i can't remember a night's sleep of greater than 5 or so hours and I'm thinking more and more about friendly, familiar and caring faces, hugs and laughs, and all that is associated with the familiar. funny enough i don't miss the physical space i call home, just the interactions with the few who i care about. I'll get there though - i think during week 6 as there is much more left to see and do...

TBC...

Last Days - The PCT

noreply@blogger.com (mountain bound) — Sun, 27 Jun 2010 05:01:00 +0000

Every time i travel west, i try to hit another section of the PCT. The stretch near sisters was lovely.

The snow pack was impressive! The trail disappeared under feet and feet of snow for many stretches.

This guy was dangling from a tree mid trail.

A really cool fungus! Left: with as much snow as there was, it was in the 60's making for a comfortable stroll.

Left: This moss was growing on a lot of the trees. It was uncertain whether it had something to do with mortality or if it was an opportunist growing after the tree died. Right: tons of siskins and warblers filled the forest!!

Yet another incredible snowy peak...

Further down the highway, this waterfall was gushing with clear spring melt.

The volume of water was impressive.

no need for words...

Forest fire... and then one last climb before hitting the road back to portland...

Left: Glimpses of Mt Hood along the way...
Right: And back to PA i went... to unpack and repack for the road trip to Nova Scotia... TBC...

Snow Packs and the desert

noreply@blogger.com (mountain bound) — Thu, 24 Jun 2010 21:49:00 +0000

The cool thing about impromptu road trips is you can go (and stop) wherever you want, whenever you want. Crater Lake National Park is an amazing spot not to be missed if you're in the area.

The temperature dropped considerably coming from the cool, cloudy coast to the high elevation park. It's only early spring here and the snow packs are still monumental to the east coast eye.

There were light flurries when we fell asleep, however the warm morning sun quickly erased any traces of snow... as we approached the park, the amount of snow increased...

and then increase some more...

and a little bit more...

yea, just a bit of snow here...

Lots of cool birds including my favorite - Pine Siskins!

Crater Lake sits is housed in/on a volcano... the views are breath taking.

it's hard to not be touristy in such an incredible place.

And then we moved onward north to seek warmth...leaving snowy dreams behind and entering a climbing haven...

Some call smith rocks the birth place of modern sport climbing. It offers intense climbing and is intensely beautiful.

Climbing aside, there are miles and miles of sandy trails here. People ride bikes, walk dogs and run...

Every view at smith is lovely... and as you leave, you are presented with awesome views of the sisters (below).

And if this wasn't enough... there's still more!!!

redwoods and coast

noreply@blogger.com (mountain bound) — Thu, 17 Jun 2010 03:56:00 +0000

Our impromptu road trip took us south, leaving the rainy forest and following the path of the sun. The clear cutting around the callahans was ominous...

We made our way to the coast via Redwood National Forest - it was an amazing drive

The scale of the redwoods is impressive - and in the context of an expansive national forest, breathtaking.

We arrived in the evening at Lost Rocks in NOCAL stoked to boulder on the beach! We slept on the cliff overlooking the ocean. The neighboring forest was picturesque and truly awe inspiring.

above: the view in the forest on one side of the road
below: the view on the other side

Part of the beach is privately owned by a native american tribe.

the rock was solid, sticky even with light mist falling on us and of beautiful form.

the sand made for a natural crash pad.

my first time bouldering in cali!

Michael took these - sedum like succulents were growing all over the boulders.

We paid Paul Bunyan and his giant blue (balled) ox a visit on our way back...
stellar.... and then....

the temperate rainforest

noreply@blogger.com (mountain bound) — Tue, 15 Jun 2010 04:16:00 +0000

When you hear the word rain forest, you may think tropics. However rainforests exist in temperate climates supporting lush mossy forests filled with character... such as this one in Oregon - see below

A carpet of ferns.

Being a research forest, paths facilitate access.

Left:Guess being a science-minded type can lend itself to serious peril??
Right: he looks innocent but is really concocting a plan to take over the world.

i'm convinced this U (yet not flying) O is part of said plan (see above).

maybe this too... (all jokes aside, they are actually doing some pretty cool ground water studies)

Dead and down trees with fitted mossy covers create unusual texture and form in the forest.

So much diversity...

And beauty - note the mini iris and bleeding hearts.

Post storm flow. Absolutely lovely. I think I need to change my study area...

road trip baby!

noreply@blogger.com (mountain bound) — Mon, 14 Jun 2010 01:31:00 +0000

A trip west turned into an impromptu road adventure, passing through amazing national parks and forests characterized by towering trees and insanely deep snow packs... ofcourse there was plenty of climbing along the way. This marked my first climbing trip ever!! See below:

LOST ROCKS - Bouldering in NOCAL

The beach was lined with boulders....the water teaming with dolphins! i swear i saw a whale but that hardy seems realistic.

he made the send look easy...

so many boulders, so little time.

i worked the easy stuff trying to get more comfortable off the ground...

A little nap and then time to eat! high style livin!

FLAGSTONE

Tucked away in the forest, this massive and super solid rock formation appeared as we ascended a tight, twisty and short muddy trail.

we started on the hydrotube, a solid 5.9 slab with small edges - stem, mantle, repeat! this was my tallest and most difficult route yet being a sustained 100' of 5.9 climbing. Bowers coached me up in spirit (Don't look up, it's all feet - find your feet!).. and i was lucky enough to have a super patient and supportive belayer (thanks michael!!)... (left - me at the base, right - that spec at the top is michael after leading the climb).

being gumby, it took me a few tries to get through the crux (just above my head in this pict). finally i got it. right - michael at the anchor.

Acne problem - a fairly straight forward 5.7+

learned how to clean an anchor, then repelled down.

The view from the top was spectacular as the sun was setting (picts thanks to michael!)

SMITH - Ropes

there were serious crowds working the easier routes on the weekend. we tried to find out of the way climbs using the guide book...

there are over 1800 routes at smith... we did some walking to find what we wanted...

birds nesting in the textured rock.

A straight forward, yet kinda sketchy / chossy 5.6 called lounger. Marked by hollow flakes and lose ledges.

Have rope, will travel.

Being tourists...

there was a small class 4 scramble to the other side of the park. serious wind and my discomfort in clunky boots yielded a decision to climb elsewhere for the time being.

A beautiful place to hang...

SMITH - Bouldering

The bouldering at smith is stellar... no really. this is what it's like.

Even more stellar, the camping - including showers!!! It rained all night this evening but the rock dries fast in the desert type climate. RIGHT: There are a lot of boulders at smith but i found the rope climbing more fun.

Search and send baby!

Not so bad for my first climbing trip ever! I've got the bug... give me more!!

light...

noreply@blogger.com (mountain bound) — Fri, 28 May 2010 18:19:00 +0000

Butterfly garden at night...Gaillardia.

Cowboy @ hunters!! good times with a good friend!!!

the bastard barb. yes, that's a fish in his mouth. he ate my siamese algae eater. (note the lives one ironically behind him in this picture).

near full moon... lovely...

chaya at night...

the end...

glass full

noreply@blogger.com (mountain bound) — Thu, 27 May 2010 16:00:00 +0000

Life has been a glass full of orange juice, ripe fresh strawberries and dark chocolate. Throw in some chalk, gritty crags and azalea & mountain laurel decorated trails and a bunch of travel...really, it can't get much better...

In the past few months progress has been made in spades including.

A successful dissertation proposal defense
Successful completion of final significant course degree requirements and signoff from my committee
Field work for the summer is set.

Now the project that through the course of two years exposed me to a different way of life turning my compass further west and introducing me to new adventures and subsequent new friends and companions... is almost done. And really, it's looking good.

Speaking of west, my dear friends are on their way east! I've missed them for the past few years even though we've been in constant touch. I'm thankful to welcome them back. And as they return I find myself following my heart west, to seek adventure and explore - in search of happiness, getting to know someone new yet surprisingly familiar.

It's time to travel and explore, see how much more i can pour into this ever expanding glass. It's time to see where my heart takes me next. The future is unknown, and open and full of options. Perfect.

fresh breath

noreply@blogger.com (mountain bound) — Wed, 28 Apr 2010 21:40:00 +0000

The breath's of spring air that i've take lately have been careful and controlled. i'm almost there-

One exam short of a semester filled with my last two major courses needed to fulfill degree requirements (regression & ANOVA).
One meeting short of (hopefully succesfully) defending my dissertation proposal allowing me to dive into data processing (road trip north!) and field work this summer.
One breath short of allowing myself to be happier than i've been in a long time.

Some semesters i've inadvertantly taken on too much. Semesters like this end with a feeling of wear and depletion with little results to show for all the effort and sacrifice and minimal motivation to keep pushing forward. This is followed by a lull where little is accomplished. This semester however is different. The hard work fueled by intentionally deep and focused breaths jumping from task to task, project to project has paid off in spaids. progress on the degree has been significant. Work is going strong and Yosemite is slowly coming to an end after 2 years of effort. All of interspersed with some solo time on the bike in the forest, and rediscovery of climbing post broken ankle. If this isn't enough, somehow, in the last days and weeks of the semester my spirit has awoken to a sparkling breath of fresh air. breaths taken these days bring with them warmth, content and happiness.

the air is crisp, clean and slowly warming with the coming of summer. the path is clear yet full of adventurous and exciting side trails. plenty to look forward to...

some pictures of events past and to be continued~

Bouldering ...

Bike polo

Rebuild!!

noreply@blogger.com (mountain bound) — Tue, 13 Apr 2010 02:00:00 +0000

Cycling is not just about riding bikes. It's also about maintaining them. Afterall, you spend the money on a sweet ride, you love riding it, it only makes sense to maintain it. What also makes sense is knowing how to fix your rig when you are miles away from home, broken down. It's a form of empowerment of sorts - facilitating independence. And working on bikes can be relaxing and rewarding.

Unfortunately, I've been so busy, all of my bikes have gone down hill.

As a part of a recent photoshoot, the Serotta got some soapy lovin.

she emerged looking shiny and new. well as new as a 12+ year old lugged steel rig can look.

Unfortunately, the shiny orange beauty was only skin deep.

years of riding in rain and sleet have taken their toll. Alas, there was maintenance i'd missed. (Thanks Billy for cleaning & for showing me the maintenance I should have been doing all this time!)

The bars were locked in but we managed to release them revealing rust and a gritty headset.

I knew the cable and housing were shot. Why not take care of the rust and bars too.

So i stripped it clean in hopes of framesavering its rusted steel insides. (this prevents / minimizes future corrosion).

The overhaul began at home...

And continued at FreezeThaw!! Justin and Sparking at FreezeThaw have taught me almost everything I know at this point. Thanks guys!!!

I pulled everything - headset, bars, bottom bracket...

The bottom bracket was a sight for sore eyes. But on a positive note, if i had the tools, i can now do all this work myself easily - well with a little elbow grease that is.

Once the framesaver love was complete, reassembly, complete with fresh grease and lube began.

Fresh cables / housing.

Fresh tape. This stuff (LizardSkin) is pretty sweet if you haven't tried it. She is tuned and just about ready to go...

ready to roll...

(plumbers) crack & the bounty

noreply@blogger.com (mountain bound) — Sun, 04 Apr 2010 23:54:00 +0000

Every year, the first big day of gardening arrives. every year i put on my old (and too big for me) jeans and a tank top and go to work forgetting completely about the sun that my skin is not used to being exposed to. And every year, the plumbers crack pays the price... but alas, this annual act of stupidity is a small price to pay... the bounty is plentiful. More importantly, there is something soulful about working in the soil and cultivating your own food. try it, you'll like it.

the crack i've been on lately is not the normal crack though that brings with it nasty side effects, poor decisions and inevitable twitches. this cultivatar is special. said crack is of the garden variety; it's seasonal. and it effects my brain (see next) and body (see bottom of this entry) in different yet similar ways.

said garden has a controversial history. I carved it from the rocky post-construction land over 5 years ago. Every bed was created by hand, by me. no powered equiptment. Just a shovel, a pick and a LOT of sweat. (to say it was a rocky abyss is an understatement). every year i'd amend the clay soil (builders typically strip top soil on a new site. in its place, they truck in rocky, rooty crap). every year the beds would become more productive. After living here for a few years, the condo board decided to force me (and everyone else) to remove their gardens. Obviously, an industrial green, fertilized lawn was ideal path to the uniformity that some sought.

i fought it - going door to door convincing neightbors my gardens should be "grandfathered in" to the association bylaws. I won the vote by a small margin and that leads me to the crack i'm on today. it's good stuff - try it, you'll like it.

This is what "my" yard looked like when i moved in. pure goodness!

my garden this year is all about function. granted there are some flowers but the goal is productivity. left: some perennials and annuals under the bird feeders. right: all pots will be largely herbs and smaller veges. i'm prepping them for planting now.

left: rosemary overwinters! right: mint - don't plant this. it takes over in a HUGE way.

Helebores are early bloomers although this is a bit late for them. lovely.

Columbine - and it's seeding after a few years of cultivation! it's a lovely pink variety.

peony is coming up. the ants love it.

i lost my strawberry patch in the past 2 years being gone in the dry weeks of august... lo and behold there were plants - spread all over. i replanted the entire bed and put in some rows to facilitate spring picking. YUM!!!!

Left: rhubarb - my newest addition! It will take 2 years for the good stuff but i can wait! Right: me giving the bunnies the finger. yea i know they'll throw that sh@t right back at me... but let me daydream that i've won atleast this week.

Left: Garlic! thanks to C this is also a new edition. Right: beets are sprouting! another first. yum!

Brussel sprouts. incredibly they overwinter. i also put in a few new plants just in case.

Left: butterfly garden. truth be told the birds and hummers like it more than the butterflies.
Right: raspberries are starting to fill out.

Spring bulbs....

bleeding hearts waking up...

The back bed is largely annuals, bulbs and perennials. This year i'm transforming it to include more native species that accommodate / feed birds.
2 b continued....

a load of shit

noreply@blogger.com (mountain bound) — Mon, 29 Mar 2010 19:29:00 +0000

The last month has been a a blur. work hard - playing hard. it's all about efficiency.

but what i've taken from it all is that it, (sh@t) happens sometimes.
and sometimes a load of shit really isn't all that bad. in fact, it can be quite good if you can manage to get it home without breaking anything.

here is how it works.

1. you go to your local composted manure provider and buy some. the fresh shit is awesome yes, but not so awesome in spring uncomposted. so you buy your shit and put it in your car only to realize, more will fit. this is wonderful. more is always better. So naturally, being a true american, you buy more. afterall, it's a minimal investment for a seasons worth of fresh, organic and delectable fruits and veges.

2. so load up as much shit as will physically fit in your car. and then notice some air gaps and realize mulch is also on sale. so maybe it's time to get some of that as well for the butterfly garden. (it needs it desparately).

it all fits fine in the back but then you realize the bags were wet from rain, and at 40lbs a shot dry, perhaps 20 is a bit much for a small subi, plus mulch, plus two large bags of potting soil. HA!

Left: a normal wheel well - i loaded up the front seat with mulch in a feeble attempt to balance out the cow shit. this obviously solved all my problems. Right: what a 1/2 ton of cow shit does to a subi.

i rolled home newly created low rider - tinted windows - with nothing but my mind on the shit and the shit on my mind. Chaya helped unload. My plants will thank me. i hope!

but wait -- there's more. Here's what we've been up to besides loading the car with shit:

i spent a week at home sick as a dog. speaking of - she has a serious tv addiction and is totally lazy. i don't get it.

More amaryllis are blooming! this is one of my favorite varities!! plus i genetically engineered a blurry cultivar (right). i'm amazing like that - ha!

There were some cold snowy road rides in the mix. i had to stop to smell, i mean take pictures of, the llamas.
more to come... after all it's spring!

Step by Step by Step

noreply@blogger.com (mountain bound) — Mon, 08 Mar 2010 01:51:00 +0000

Spring is near. The cardinals are singing, the raptors on their way back... to celebrate C & I ventured south to check in the steps. all 1036 of them...

We made our way up the Link trail towards the steps.

Up we went...

look close - natural (and not so natural) imprints...

Small sections of the trail were a bit sketchy...

unidentified buteo. possibly a red shoulder?

water and ice in the remnant quarry shed...

witchazel, post bloom.

enjoyin the view...

Juniata River / Mt Union.

Left: link trail -- Right: woodpeckers were here!

it was a much needed break. outside.
the end.

the things that happen in winter

noreply@blogger.com (mountain bound) — Mon, 22 Feb 2010 02:27:00 +0000

winter in state college - 2010:

We've had just a bit of snow. Chaya is "so over it".

some are more appreciative than others....

and chaya says "you want me to go potty where??"

And while it's winter outside, it's spring in my dining room.

They only bloom once a year following a dry dark hibernation that mimics their natural tropical environment. after years of cultivation, i enjoy multiple stalks and blossoms on each stalk. lovely.

What do cyclists do when snow comes?? They ski ofcourse! (Top of Bear Meadows Rd.)

Crystal Lake!! i only fell a few hundred times. ok just on every descent. so worth it! (i stole this pict from eric - thanks!!)

Moss-Hanne trail.

Canadians make funny faces when they see cameras.

skiing is rough on the toes. thank goodness a little duck tape goes such a long way.

crazy adventures around the ridge and the fenceline! deep deep powdery snow drifts.

more to come. for now, back to work i go...

aliens

noreply@blogger.com (mountain bound) — Fri, 19 Feb 2010 20:49:00 +0000

This is pretty intense. Watch what this fungus does to this ant!! (starts to get good around 1:20 or so).

free

noreply@blogger.com (mountain bound) — Tue, 19 Jan 2010 03:14:00 +0000

It sometimes feels like life is lead by a particular type of prescribed direction. Not fate per se, but moreover signs and experiences that lead us to make particular decisions and thus take our lives down particular paths. Some experiences are in part impacted by past experiences - negative and positive. Others, new and fresh.

Yesterday was marked by a bit of frustration - wanting in the worst way to get my degree and have the freedom to explore the world; realizing it may take a bit of time. Today I awoke to a glimpse of something so free and strong perched in a tree in my backyard. It took off to hunt and returned to flaunt its success. Survival is her goal this time of the year. It was this reminder of the larger world that humbles my little bubble. This world so different from my home that I am so drawn to - wanting to explore. Meet others, different and learn as I go.

This desire triggered, largely by one stranger who lives his life outside of the box. I may never see him again yet our time sparked change that I will carry with me always.

And now as I contemplate the world, and the possibility of sharing it with someone - anyone really - i realize that other experiences, perhaps more negative have tainted my ability to trust. in particular moments I catch my otherwise carefree self, tense. On one hand, i'm thankful as these negative experiences forced me to know myself in a way I wouldn't have explored otherwise. And inspired free-willed independence which in turn inspired the drive to explore. On the other hand, in other moments I still need to remind myself to breath deep.

my path twists and turns and with each bend i gain increased self understanding. my heart seeks adventure and intense experience that puts life into context. my heart also wants to trust. perhaps with time i'll find that freedom.

freeze-thaw

noreply@blogger.com (mountain bound) — Sun, 17 Jan 2010 15:15:00 +0000

The forest is no longer a snowy wonderland. The trails are largely clear and muddy in many places. The roads remain icy but largely, the forest has transformed once again to a bare, brown wintery landscape. Even though it's a ways away, I can taste spring. Lovely.

cause-effect

noreply@blogger.com (mountain bound) — Fri, 15 Jan 2010 23:07:00 +0000

There is a ironic yet sad cycle that is evident in our society. It proceeds as follows

1. we, humans, do something that is seemingly harmless or "in the name of a better good"
2. said action triggers an (obviously unanticipated) chain reaction of events that are largely detrimental to the environment around us
3. this sequence comes round about - eventually resulting in some other consequence that is grand in scale enough to impacts us once again and demand "action".
-- back to #1, so the cycle continues.

This week, the USDA announced plans to "terminate" 15,000-20,000 birds in the name of safe aviation. The culprit birds, European Starlings, are non-native and invasive species that were introduced, by us, into this country in the 19th century. They are aggressive, noisy and fly dynamically in large flocks with seemingly choreographed precission which can be nothing short of spectacular.

However, they have become a nuisance. Now 20,000 must die. A slow death via poison. Certainly I understand the potential danger a flock of birds of this size, whose population continues to exponentially grow, can present to aircraft and thus human lives. But the irony surrounding our introduction of this species without realizing the consequences and subsequent poisoning of said species, also without really knowing all of the consequences seems absurd. And sad. really, really sad.

contradictions

noreply@blogger.com (mountain bound) — Tue, 12 Jan 2010 03:15:00 +0000

it's hard to not question motives. motives of everyone. words spoken are heard but are they really felt? and moreover what are the true intentions? it's easy to believe in a way of life that seems best yet live and follow a life path that's distinctly different from those beliefs.

given a world of contradictions, which path is most true? and furthermore how can one tell truth from a purely aesthetic-based presentation of a perceived self that in reality doesn't exist?

i contemplate the collision between what brings with it comfort, security and happiness and what path is best - the path most sensitive to the non-human environment. i have a home filled with things, a car that i like to drive yet avoid knowing it's greater scale impact. the footprint of my home is more suited for a family yet i live there. i avoid eating meat for environmental and ethical reasons yet I am still trying to fight using products that are most certainly tested on animals or environmentally harsh. i understand the impacts of climate change yet i still purchase bananas and other non-locally produced foods at the store. is it possible to live a life, in this society, and in this day and age that does not involve contradiction?

in truth my happiest moments have been consistently the most simple. they have involved few of the things described above that bring with them security and comfort. and in fact, some of the most memorable times have been those most uncomfortable that force an overwhelming awareness of a world and environment that's complexity is beyond the full grasp of even the greatest human minds.

given the contradictions that i constantly try to iron out in my own life, i wonder what others think and what to do with their words. how does one trust and love and be comfortable when surrounded by contradiction?

it is in these moments that i miss soulful friends - ones with open hearts and minds, a sense of self-awareness and true compassion for all that is life who are seemingly scattered around the country. simultaneously and perhaps more powerfully, i miss the simplicity and freedom of a much simpler life - time spent in the woods, on my bike, on foot - time spent alone following an adventourous path that is largely unknown, unplanned and uncontained in any way.

at times, its overwhelming. who's happiness and best interest is most important?
at other times however, it's all too clear.

COLLAPSE

noreply@blogger.com (mountain bound) — Mon, 04 Jan 2010 04:27:00 +0000

If you know me then you know that music, in part, fuels my existence. All kinds too. My roots are classical however I grew up listening to dc underground hard core and metal... soon discovering hip hop, electronic, R&B, gogo, reggae, alternative.....My good friend and summer cycling training partner in crime is in a band called Collapse. It's a metal / rock band that is lyrical, theatrical and brings with it a heavy hard to the bone rhythm. They rock it.

The venue: inside marked with crazy lighting, lots of background noise and movement. What better place to play with the camera?? Good times -- unfortunately i forgot to capture the crowd... but the coolest mountain bikers were there. You'll just have to take my word for it... anyway see below:

Afterall, when on stage, it is about the show...

Long exposures are fun

LEFT: perhaps this is why they call him the pontzatron?

Pontzer was my 101 partner in crime!! ;)

Killer, himself. unabridged.

Gary is an aweome guitarist...

intense... plus, he doesn't whine. ever.

it's all about the music...

darkness.

NYD

noreply@blogger.com (mountain bound) — Sat, 02 Jan 2010 15:05:00 +0000

No alcohol, no excess or indulgence, no mahem, just me, my gimpy but healing ankle and a digital window into the world i see around me. Oh yea and a smelly, pyrex eating brown dog. Yup, I went back. Twice is a charm right?

Invasion of the white German Shepard! We ran into friends in the woods and all hiked together for a bit.

no you are not seeing double...
don't be fooled by the big brown Labrador eyes. she's a trouble maker.

Striped Maple: invasion, yes. Yet striking in the winter.

Burn remnants down by wind and ice...

Quit standing around mom.

AND we have a downy woodpecker! red heads are gone but the downy's stick around.
RIGHT: Look close for a raven in this poorly taken shot...

Reynolds misses this trail a lot.

beauty in details...

cuteness.

(Terrible) Parting Shot: A KESTREL! this guy is always perched along 322 when you leave Bear Meadows heading back towards town. Look for him! He's a beauty.

a cloudy blue moon

noreply@blogger.com (mountain bound) — Sat, 02 Jan 2010 02:50:00 +0000

I am not into celebrating holidays. To me it's a time of largely excessive consumerism and qualification of relationships via gestures, often monetary in nature, that largely happen at this time because society says they should. It's not that i don't appreciate thinking about other people. It's the notion that it must be done, given particular timing and in a particular way regardless of appropriateness or sentiment. It's can be a largely consumer fed capitalist push. It feels contrived.

However, in the same regard, the holidays can be a lonely time. Not only a reminder of what you have, but also, what you don't have. Given that thought, I decided to not grapple with the demons that I normally tackle this time of the year. I decided to not plan and just do. I followed my heart to a place that I knew would clear my head. I experienced the first minutes of 2010, relaxed, at peace, content, satisfied and happy. i experienced it in a place that is special to me in a way that words can't quite convey. My perspective of the forest as illustrated via Avatar, captures some of how I feel.

And so, while my camera can't quite capture the adventure in full, it provides a window... to something... Here's to putting a year of mixed unbelievable highs and heart-wrenching lows behind and to starting anew in the most positive of lights... and so begins the NYE under a cloudy blue moon.

The subi KILLS the snow. Right: My plastic brown dog. she freezes solid and glazes over when the temps drop below 36.5

The ridge. Rock / snow gardens??

Cowboy texted me during the day and was down with the blue moon. Right: trailwork!

lovely...

There was a ghost on the ridge. it told me stuff... ;)

a soft snowy wonderland.

magical canopy

precariously leaning snags... RIGHT: fireworks at midnight... (and gun fire - sketchy!)

and the trail takes me...
WHEREVER I WANT TO GO.

HAPPY NEW YEAR everyone. follow your heart and the path that suits you best.

the best worst idea ever.

noreply@blogger.com (mountain bound) — Tue, 29 Dec 2009 02:00:00 +0000

Life's been lacking in the adventure department these days. For the time being, traveling is not in the cards, nor are long forest rides and hikes. I finally managed to fill my adventure tank just a bit with a little winter camping this past week.

Leroy was in town this week and that meant
a) good times with the SC party crew
b) winter camping / backpacking.

We filled out packs and set out in the dark on the coldest night this week - to camp in the forest. Given a still gimpy ankle, we didn't hike in far - hiking up north meadows to the bear meadows trail and into the woods to find a perfect spot under some hemlocks.

Sure, it may seem like a truly bad idea to sleep outside in the snow under the stars and hemlocks without a tent or high tech bag in 15 degree weather. But really, there isn't a better "bad" idea! I have missed the forest and immediately felt at home once i hit the trail.

a sweet fire, snacks, whiskey, a bunch of warm layers and a few sleeping bags, plus good peoples & conversation; good friends, good times.

baby steps

noreply@blogger.com (mountain bound) — Fri, 18 Dec 2009 21:30:00 +0000

Sometimes the best way to forget one injury is with another. In my case, i traded in bruised ribs for a broken ankle, both of which are healing quickly. I can now walk up stairs - and down slowly. And for the first time in weeks, I road my geared bike outside. No single speed commuter action just yet, but soon I think. I can ride inside on the rollers and I am back to pullups and abs and stretching.

Granted I'm missing out on some sweet snowy forest hikes and xc skiing... BUT maybe this is OK. After working my ass off for the past three weeks, my 3rd round proposal revisions are done and submitted. And now - it's time for girls weekend!! Jess is coming back to hang for a few days and we're kicking the weekend off with an indoor trainer session with DC.

It's all about taking baby steps - patiently healing, making the best of circumstances even if less than opportune and moving forward.
Life is good. Real good.