♥ Life at best is BitterSweet ♥

Christmas...and so much more.

2012-12-30T00:22:00.003+08:00

I'm always feeling excited when it comes to December every year.

it's not because of the Mayan's myth about the world end but the xmas celebration, new year and all sorts of exciting activities going on.

well, and because i'm too afraid that the world will really end in 21/12/12, i quickly went to get my hair cut so i could die prettily...just in case, u know.

this is me before getting a hair makeover! dull..boring, ugly colors etc etc.

then........

weeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee! absolutely love this hair cut and the curls i'm having. first time perming my hair and am very satisfied with the outcome. thanks Alice. Do visit TheHairFactory for more info.

So, the world, finally, is still alive and that means the Christmas celebration is ON.

well, wasn't quite sure about the exact plan at first as i was busy working on the eve and didn't really know where to go.

and yea, single bells alllllll the way, i thought.

then, it came the last minute plan with the mabuk gang.
sadly, too late to plan for a gift exchange session, so we just had our dining @ Leornado's dining room and wine loft, Bangsar. very cosy environment, the food was good and the deserts were awesome.

awesome chocolate volcano is awesome!!!!!!

us, food, and lots more~

Christmas gifts this year!!! Thanks :D

i had so much great time celebrating Christmas this year. i hope i could have awesome celebrations every year. :)

another good news to share is that i finally bought the airtickets to go HK next year.
HUUUURAYYY!
2013 WILL BE AWESOME!!!!

2 more days to a brand new year. i have no plan in mind...sigh!
well, hope i won't spend my day rotting at home. :D

Merry Belated Christmas and a Happy New year!!!!

Happy 2013!!!

笨

2012-12-02T03:20:00.002+08:00

之前是有够期待这一天的到来。

今天起床却觉得自己好像做了些无聊傻事。

刚刚还尴尬死了。

难道不是这种感觉吗？

之前受过的伤应该已经痊愈了。

到底我要的是什么？

可能我是没有安全感。

明知道你是个怎样的人，还整个人仆了过去，让自己跌入火坑。

不可能认真。

因为你的行为有所保留。

再加上我也不是那些随随便便容易得逞的那类。

应该，你也只是当作消遣吧。

有机会就找吃找吃，没机会就当作得空没事出来走走。

唉。

你也找错人了吧！

酒吧夜店应该可以找到啊。

干嘛找个无聊飞机场的丑小鸭？

难道想尝试不同味道？？

应该不好吃咯！

还是放弃吧你！

告诉自己一切都是一厢情愿。

根本就是自己在找苦头。

若你是真的，应该会做更多。

不应该只是这样。

犯贱的自己，却很enjoy这样傻傻的被愚弄。

唉，后果自负吧！

晚安了！

Love love love....

2012-10-24T23:16:00.001+08:00

was watching this Korean reality show named "Lets Get Married" with my sister just now.

the show is about few couples of random Korean artists were picked and to show how both of them, acted as couple, living together and their sweet moments doing daily chores.

i don't always watch Korean drama/show whatever, but when i do, THERE MUST BE SOME HOT HUNKS IN THE SHOW...especially Caucasians. awww....

and yes...there's this Korean mixed Canadian super damn hot muscular dude named "Julien Kang"

i was like drooling watching the show until it finished.

seriously, he's so cool/handsome/cute/muscular/safe/sweet/adorable/manly/hugable/kissable.....looking.

u girls should just go checking him out, watch the show, google him, whatever.

i wonder how his partner (in the show) could ever resist his so adorable smile and everything.

i think if i'm his partner, i will just stare at him throughout the show. LOL

and...

it kinda reminds me of...u.

well, i guess i should just give up.

don't think u will actually fall for someone so average like me.

i know i'm not open minded like what u mentioned and u wouldn't like someone with very traditional thinking.

it's alright.

"nevermind i'll find...someone like u~ i wish nothing but the best for u too!"

sigh.

guess my prince charming will not be coming this year.

2013, PLEASE BE BETTER I BEG U!

lastly, would like to share a video i watched on facebook.

a very sweet video and i seriously would marry the guy who tells me all that shits. LOL

good night!

(i love u prince charming)

invisible

2012-10-18T02:29:00.000+08:00

i wonder why, i was SO DAMN happy when i found this song.
was looking for it for months...
and i had to say, somehow, u look kinda like Clay Aiken.
ahahhahahahaha!

what u doing tonight? i wish i could be a fly on ur wall...

:)

everything new

2012-10-18T02:24:00.002+08:00

weeewaaa.....
thanks to Alice Boon who just gave me the strength and motivation to update my blog layout.
i know it's really dusty right here.
well, have no time for all these.
but i promise i'll flood the entire page with pictures...soon (i said it many times already)!

it's 2.15AM right here and guess what, I'M ON LEAVE FOR THE NEXT 2 DAYS!
thats why i have this extra times to deco the page a little.
:D
just done uploading PBB annual dinner and appreciation dinner pic on fb.
so i'm gonna show u guys some of the pictures taken right here.

ta-da~~~ no no, i'm not going for muay thai, it's my costume as a penguin T T

the make up group used this BUNCHO as the makeup tools. no one reminds them that our faces are not papers...

with the bunch of good good frens of R5.

with my colleagues of PKG.

with Mabeline the pweeetie.

went to HandM and bought this featherlicious earings. LOVE IT.

and HandM has got many choices for accessories.

so the next day, went to The Hair Factory for my make up and hairdo before attending my friend's wedding dinner.

everything done by Alice Boon. THANKS BABE!!! I LOVEEEEE IT SO MUCH.

it seriously made a lot difference than my own make up. how come??? = =

alright. good night pals.

it's hard

2012-10-11T23:16:00.001+08:00

when u try doing things perfectly and they fail most of the times.

when u know u shouldn't have done something and u just did it unintentionally.

when u feel so helpless and yet there's no one u could share with.

when u know no matter how hard u pray, things will not change.

when u try so hard to please everyone and yet no one understands u.

when u know u just gonna put 200% more effort than anybody else to achieve something.

when u know u want a change so hard and yet reality fails everything.

when u know u work so hard trying to save money and still being the poorest ones.

complicated feelings.

feeling excited and disappointed at the same time.

i only have 1 wish.

a wish that seems too little to be realized.

i pray so hard that miracle happens.

i did something to make things work.

still, i've gained nothing.

how much time can i wait?

how much money can i spend?

seriously, at this point of time, i know i don't have that much of money to support all these.

and i dont have time for it as well.

24 this year...another few more months to be 25!

God please help me! :(

wake me up when September ends...

2012-09-23T16:42:00.001+08:00

a hectic month indeed.
was occupied with roadshows and tons of work and dance rehearsal for the annual dinner...again.
so...the theme for this year is Safari Escapade.
sounds fun huh...and yes, it's FUN because...this time around, we'll be dressing like the most adorable living creature on the planet.
guess what...
we are turning into CUTE-LITTLE-AWESOME-BLUEISH-BABY PENGUINS

hmm, not as cute as these though. :(
just that the costume is in sea blueish hoodie.
cool penguins perhaps. :D
and the steps for this year are much easier...
with so much of GANGNAM steps in it! = ='''
so its more like the whole jungle dancing gangnam on stage. = ='''
so much of the gangnam...and its not even easy dancing like that.
we were like a bunch of sweaty penguins jumping around. = =''' PENGUINS cant do gangnam style!!!
lol.

so, next week is my ji mui's bridal shower day and the dress code is...PINK DRESSES.
i'm kinda tensed up a little because i dont have any pink dresses.
so i googled pink dresses and found these.

kinda like dress number 5 but not sure where can i find something similar in Klang Valley.
sigh...
gotta spend money again~~~~ :(

it still hurts...

2012-08-25T04:46:00.003+08:00

indeed.

everytime hearing friends talking about the past.
everytime knowing the facts about what happened.
everytime realizing the truth behind all lies and betrayals.
everytime admitting myself for being the stupidest person on earth.
yes, it still hurts.

didn't know i'd still cry when i talked about it just now.
seriously, the feeling SUCKS....
to actually know how everything started, who started it all and how it ended.
every tiny pieces of fact is like the puzzle piece that finally make sense putting together.

knowing all these finally gave me an answer to my question "are you the one?".
no...exactly.

u broke my fragile heart into pieces and now, u are asking me to accept u as a different person and also, a second chance.
i know, everyone deserves a second chance. everyone make mistakes.
but, i'm not sure if my heart could cope with the pain.

well, to be frank, i am thankful that things happened this way.
it hurts so bad, but, it's a valuable lesson to learn in relationship, in life, in friendship.
and i'm happy with what i have right now.
single.
and still searching for the right one.
with friends, besties and family who are being very supportive to every thing i do.

i'm glad.

:)

SIGH~~~~

2012-08-21T22:09:00.001+08:00

4 days of awesome weekends and holidays have finally ended.
will be working tmr!

Boring!!!
but nvm...will only be working for few days to another weekend.
life's great when there're holidays.
:D
basically spent these few days DRINKING, DRINKING, AND DRINKING.
planned to go for a short trip nearby but the plan failed.
and i'm glad the plan didn't work as there were MASSIVE road congestions reported on the radio and facebook.
uh-huh! so who's smarter now? haha
good luck to all working people!

and have fun~~~ :3

i wont give up!!!!

2012-08-15T22:33:00.003+08:00

August...
another stressful month.
went dinner with fellow colleagues just now whom, some i just knew for few days.
am really happy about the entire training session as i get to learn new things and to know how the rest is selling.

and yet, at the same time, i am all tensed up after knowing how much the rest had achieved.
i thought training would make myself feel better and motivated.
i felt the other way round.
seriously, been working in the bank for...a year plus and still couldn't achieve the appointed target was really embarrassing.
knowing most of the juniors had already covered 50% of the prorated, some even more, keeps me thinking about my own achievement.
seriously, WHATDAFUCK did i do in this 1 year ++ time?
sigh, i have no fucking idea.
did i just lose all the passion in my own job?
i feel sorry for my MR and BM whom tried so hard giving me advices and pushed me for more figures.
i seriously disappoint them.

the feeling of...losing...is so unbearable.
and I HATE LOSING.

trust me, I WILL NEVER FUCKING GIVE UP.
i will keep trying until i achieve my sales target, at least 50% of the prorated.
seriously, NO MORE FUCKING SLACKING AND LAZYING!!!!

It all starts...TOMORROW!
i'll still be having my last day of training @ Bangi, but i will never give up my day just like that.
Friday, i will work my ass out for it.
no matter how hard/stressful it will be, i WILL fucking do it!may LUCK be with me always!

Tomorrow...will be a good day!!!!

for SURE!

自作自受

2012-07-26T00:59:00.000+08:00

寧靜的夜晚。

喝了点酒的我怎么在这个时候觉得那么清醒！

只能说自己。。。有够傻！

明知是陷阱，卻毫不犹豫的往下走。

现在跌倒了才觉得痛。

这就是叫自作自受吧！

也只怪自己犯贱啦！

唉。。。

算了啦！

原来不是你。

2012-07-21T01:33:00.004+08:00

很温馨的一个晚上。
虽然刚开始很紧张，甚至不想走出門外。
最后还是尝试放鬆自己，让自己跨出第一步了。
口花花，是你的本性。
我告诉自己，千萬别再次掉进那甜蜜的圈套。
我想，我應該是那213128191个女生吧？
很希望你不是那种类型的男生。
很可惜，你就是那种很典型的玩咖。
: (
唉。
原来不是你。

纳闷。

這樣的六月。。。唉

2012-06-12T22:55:00.004+08:00

唉。
最近還真的是衰。
原以為一向來只要努力就能順利達成目標。
這次卻因為自己的自以為是与疏忽而造成一切的問題。
很討厭自己那很急躁的個性。
常常因為一下子的衝動而做錯了決定。
然後就會很後悔當初的選擇。
不明白。
巨蟹座應該不是這種個性的吧！
對於自己的猶豫不決与急性子已不陌生。
以前，時常因為自己那衝動的不良思考，而做錯了決定，讓自己失去了朋友，時間。
看來，現在的我，改變，也不到哪兒吧！:(
一心想把所以事情處理的很妥當，但卻因為自己的疏忽而帶給自己很多麻煩。
就像上次客戶誤會了自己所解釋關於基金的事。
今天，也因為心急，駕快車，差點撞上了孕婦。
若那剎那沒急時煞車，我想，後悔也真的來不及了。
小姐，真的很對不起！
唉。

剛剛看了台灣水災報導。
很擔心。
雨啊雨，可以就這樣停下來嗎？
台灣之旅是不可以泡湯啊！！
不過還好。
剛剛了解了台中天氣狀況。
雨量還好，也沒淹水。
希望旅程一切順利的進行吧！
:(

啊。。。
我還有什麼坏事會發生呢？

不懂。

無解。

晚安

May Day

2012-05-14T22:43:00.001+08:00

MAY~~~
the awesome moment when u know June is next...which makes me really exceptionally excited because....

"我的好朋友，号角翔起来咯！今天要去那里？我们要到台湾去~~~YEAH YEAH YEAH"

get it? get it?
no?
nvm! = ='''

well, i had so much fun the past few months.
first of all, my lovely Susan is finally back from Singapore and will be here for months time.

aww...i miss u!!! smoochies
attended my first secondary school mate's wedding and be part of the ji mui.
then attended cousin's wedding too.

had so many crazy ideas on how to torture the bridegroom during the day of the marriage.
:D

and had so much wonders about how my future husband's gonna look like.
watched the show clips about the bride and bridegroom seriously made me tears.
wondering how 7 - 8 years relationship can be that strong and stable？
people tend to say when u r in a relationship for long, u'll feel secure with the existence and that makes the relationship stable.
but why were my relationships so damn freaking awfully fragile?
the last one only lasted for a year. = =
sigh..
同人不同命
anyway, happy marriage for the 2 couples! :D

oh ya!
one more happy new to share.
last week joined the roadshow in Banting.
and managed to close 4 CASES!
im so bloody happy about the outcome...though i'm the only one getting the least cases.
but fred not....the next one falls on next Saturday!
7 CASES...is what i'm aiming for!

go go go!!!

alright!
happy Tuesday! :D

梦一场

2012-04-14T01:43:00.000+08:00

早知道是这样像梦一场
我才不会把爱都放在同一个地方
我能原谅你的荒唐
荒唐的是我没有办法遗忘
早知道是这样如梦一场
我又何必把泪都锁在自己的眼眶
让你去疯让你去狂
让你在没有我的地方坚强

让我在没有你的地方疗伤

报复

2012-04-08T22:49:00.001+08:00

刚刚在facebook看到这个瞒有意思的墙帖，想分享下。

小三的出现是为了让你看清楚，
身边的那个人并不值得你爱，
无所谓任何争吵与责怪..

能被抢走的爱人就不算爱人，
能背叛你的人同样也能背叛小三，
不如大方地展现出你的仁慈，
把你的他拱手送给小三..

有一天你会发现
你的仁慈，
才是对小三作最残忍的报复..

作者 : www.facebook.com/mukangng

文字写得一点都没错。

就算你忏悔，再多的道歉也弥补不了你对我的伤害。

你更没那资格叫那女人奸，因为这一切都是你闯的祸，你就应该得到应得的教训。

现在的我过得很好。

未来也会让自己过得很好。

因为唯有让自己过得更美好，才是对那段糟糕的感情的报复。

心淡

2012-04-08T03:39:00.000+08:00

无奈。。。

是不是夜晚特别的敏感？

让坚强的我突然变得很懦弱。

每首动人的情歌都变得特别的悲伤。

特别几首熟悉的歌曲，让我想起你。

勾起那些无法忘记的回忆。

如果感情可以像那些情歌来得简单快乐那就好。

那，爱情就不会像现实般脆弱。
很讨厌那些回忆，让自己变得很脆弱。
看着别人甜蜜的感情，不尽叹气。
我要的并不难，但往往简单的要求却是难以取得。
我知道感情是不能强求。
所以我一直抱着很大的期望。
希望下一段美好的感情。

唉。。。
Mr. Right,
你还在吗？
是迷路了吗？
我一直都在这儿等着你！

加油吧！

"由这一分钟开始计起春风秋雨间，恨我对你以半年时间慢慢的心淡，付清账单，平静的对你热度退减，一天一点伤心过这一百数十晚，大概也够我送我来回地狱又折返人间，春天分手秋天会习惯，苦冲开了变淡。"

STRONGER!!

2012-04-05T00:22:00.001+08:00

just came back from a yumcha cum sharing session with one of the senior.
i've learnt so much. it was a very fulfilling session.
we shared so much...mainly about work, and also on other issues about life and the way we see it.
i've made a mistake to actually arrange my customer to do some follow ups at the same time and the same place.
dumb decision as i couldn't divide myself into two.
so, as usual, i've got tensed up because, u know, when u want to make things easy and short for ur customer as ur customer is in a rush to somewhere else and u do not want to spend time explaining so much and also want to make the presentation better to make urself look a little not too silly with your senior around looking at u.
so, the end result? i screwed it. :(
sigh, and at the same time making myself look awful and dumb.
seriously, why did i get all these nervous breakdown when a situation like that occured? this is not the first time tho.
:(
i guess it's all because of my low self-esteem and confidence.
well, guess i've still yet to conquer the negative side of me.
i'm always a negative person when it comes to something that i'm not really good at.
when things slightly turned to the other side of the way, i'll get all paranoid and then easily be influenced by all the negative vibes around.
then, the "I CAN'T DO IT" and "MAYBE THIS IS NOT FOR ME" and "WHY AM I SO UNLUCKY" thinking occurred which will then pull myself backwards to my comfort zone and not moving away from it to achieve the goal.
i know, standing still in the comfort zone will never help myself to grow and learn.
i've tried to push myself away from it and yet, it wasn't for long.
he, my senior, told me that we should look at things differently.
he's right about a point that, we shouldn't take "karma" that seriously, not in a religious way.
if we always believe that someone who has previously did something bad to us, will soon be getting his/her punishment for his/her own deeds, we then will also be having the same karma as we are hoping someone's getting the bad treatment from what he/she has done.
why not look at things differently by telling ourselves that it's ok to be treated that way because he/her might be right for what he/she has done or maybe it's the earlier mistakes that we have done.
also, i'm agreed that nothing good comes your way without working on it.
i know "luck" plays an important role in not only sales line, but all industry. BUT, REMEMBER, 90% comes from hardwork and determination.
i do agreed that no one, or maybe a very very very minority of people has that kinda luck for having great things happening to him/her without fighting for it.
i had bad times these few months trying to achieve the target given.
was seriously down at the bottom and demotivated.
but after the whole yumcha session with him, i'm so much 'awake' right now.
guess it's not the market problem but my own perception.
not too late to change i supposed.
yeap, I WILL DEFINITELY CONQUER THE FEAR OF HANDLING OBJECTIONS.
if everyone can overcomes the same problem, then, the problem is no longer a problem but an opportunity to greater achievement.
i'm gonna change my way of work.
tomorrow will be a good day! :D

have a motivated Thursday friends.
good night!

累累的

2012-04-01T23:16:00.000+08:00

smiley~ :)

2012-03-04T21:54:00.000+08:00

thought i should update my blog with less vulgar and more decent wordings so i'll get rid of all hatreds and negative vibes around me....
AIYA...who cares? LOL
so recently had been really...really...really...busy with work...gym and lots of activities going on.
kinda make myself a little busy so i could spend more quality time with something more productive.
think i lost my weight too! wahahahahahaha!
but still with layers of tummies and fats around.
i'm working on it :)
wanna look thin and am trying so hard to cut down my meal.
but...most of the time failed = ='''
sigh...

am kinda...confuse about...the direction that i'm heading to.
am not quite sure if i'm walking on the right path right now.
as in my career.
i know i'm working in the best bank ever in Malaysia that offers great benefits to employees.
i'm just unsure about whether i manage to deal with the things that i do.
i know...i shouldn't have worry about all these, instead, do the best and plan ahead.
well, sometimes, things pull u down..u fall, and u wonder...should i continue walking the journey? i might injure myself again...or should i just...go the other way?
i'm not sure! :(
at this point of time, i'll just continue with what i'm doing.
trying my best and to focus on whats important in life! :)
whats important?
FAMILY
FRIENDS
MONEY
MONEY
MONEY
MONEY

thats right! :)
i put family and friends before MONEY...
because MONEY cant buy all those!

good night~!

pathetic guy is always pathetic!

2012-02-28T00:08:00.001+08:00

"please dont get over with what you wrote on facebook or blog. dont write nonsense we were still together 2 months before break up darn. this is such a lie. if i still together with you i would have called you when i at sabah but this is not at all in my mind. i will not text u or call u again and see ur blog or fb such a waste of my freaking time. God give me a break with all these shits. just one accident so many lies and fakes out. everything i remember very clear d and BYE! dont ruin my name outsiders with your words dont over it. chao."

pathetic...enough!

good luck!

cheater...will always be a cheater!

2012-02-27T23:46:00.000+08:00

it's really sucks looking back at our photos!
it reminds me how fake u 2 were last time.
one was trying to pretend ntg happened and still wanna talk to me as girl friend.
one who fucking betrayed me...after a year of relationship...u r seriously...the worst asshole ever in this world.
the puchong trip was the worst memory ever in my life.
one slept beside me acted like ntg happened.
the other one slept with another dude the entire night pretending to be innocent so she could seduce more morons to sleep with her!
all i can see from the picture is a whore who fucked with 2 desperate dicks and still acting all innocent and fucking retarded asking me "HEY, WOULD U MIND IF I GET CLOSE TO UR BF? OH....USUALLY MY FRIEND'S GF WOULD ANTI ME IF I DO THAT!"
seriously, i have to thank both of them!
firstly, i learned a big lesson, which is always wise to pick the right friend! not a friend who would sleep with my bf!
2ndly, a guy who cheated...will forever be a cheater no matter what! i was too blinded to discover these previously...because i trusted both of them!
and yet, betrayal...is all i get!
well, thanks for that!
no worries!
i'll live better than before!
:) good night

what doesn't kill me makes me stronger

2012-02-26T02:41:00.001+08:00

it was a tough month....
to struggle through everything that happened to me...
and the ugly truth i thought wouldn't happen to me.
it's a mistake to learn..
to go through the hard time to finally come to the ease...
i'm glad things had finally over.
i will stop wasting my time trying to fight over what u told everyone about us.
because...to explain to a jerk like u is seriously a waste of my saliva/time/money/blood/energy/sweat/everything.
why bother about u when i have so much fun to catch in life?
i think God is treating me really good.
first of all, to broke up with u before accident, and then to realized everything u've done behind my back after the break up.
at least, i wouldn't feel that much of pain if i knew it when we were still couple.
i've made the right choice. i'm really glad.
to have so many friends supporting me, comforting me when i'm struggling through hard times is the best thing i have ever had.
seriously, thanks friends! especially to all my awesome girl friends.
everything else doesn't matter anymore!
i'm totally happy with who i am right now...and i'm living my life to the fullest.
thanks for all these tough experience....
it makes me stronger for sure...
oh ya, heard that u guys had sex in December.
i know, it's definitely difficult to share the same pussy with different dicks...
but dude, u deserve it!

HELL YEAH~
bye sweet dream guys!

i miss u

2012-01-24T02:37:00.000+08:00

i seriously do...

this cny is so different without u...

it seems to be quieter than previous years...

and it keeps me thinking about everything that happened to us.

i know, i should not bring all these relationship things up at this moment but...

i couldn't stop myself from thinking about it.

and asking myself why...

why things turned out this way?

why did u ignore me?

why did u just give up the relationship like that?

why did u have to call her and invite her out that day?

why did u have to fetch her personally?

why did u have to be that close to her when u know what type of person she is?

why did u have to encounter such tragic incident?

why didn't u call me earlier that day?

why...why??

i know...as long as u r okay, everything else doesn't matter.

but, what about us?

what am i to u?

am i just....nothing to u that u can simply just forget about everything we came thru?

i know...i know..

i'm being sensitive and thinking too much about all these.

i js couldn't help myself...

i hate that i miss u....

这不是简单的快乐！:)

2012-01-16T22:45:00.001+08:00

刚从医院回来。
真的很开心！
知道你康复的状况，我真的放下心头大石！
我试着叫你，你没反应！
医生说需要时间！
加油吧！
我永远都是你的好朋友！
在旁边支持你的！
一定要加油！
我们都爱你！