Personal Development Blog

Look Internal First

noreply@blogger.com (Paola) — Thu, 09 Jul 2009 10:35:00 +0000

Speaking to a few clients this week, I realised there was a theme running through our sessions, very similar to each other in many ways. All are exploring new career options and deciding which way to go. It is easy to just say "it is just my career" and yet when we go digging what is really going on for them the career is the external element, in all honesty something deeper is the issue.

That is why we need to look at the internal side first, how we feel and what we want for the future. Sure you need to be practical and realistic, however being happy in yourself is paramount to attracting what you want in your professional life. Looking for the external to fulfill your internal being is not the right way, it can be fun and exciting yet this will not last as you keep trying to fill that void inside.

So as I have also learnt, we need to stop and think about our values, what we treasure what gives us joy and focus on this. What is your life plan and what are you willing to let go of to have it?

Only through looking inside will you awaken, the choices become clearer and you will be motivated and jump from your bed in the morning looking forward to making it happen!

What Inspires You?

noreply@blogger.com (Paola) — Mon, 06 Jul 2009 02:11:00 +0000

Today I am feeling somewhat inspired, so I thought I would list those things and people who inspire me, this way I can consolidate my thoughts and get on track. Today is about being productive in the time allocated, no waffling around! Here goes..

Things that inspire me:

Nature
Sunshine
Chocolate, white Lindt thanks!
The sea
Banana bread
The sand
Sailing
Walking with my little girl
Yoga
Relaxing
Watching cooking shows like MasterChef!

People that inspire me:

Thomas my husband
My daughter, Alexa
My Parents
Other dynamic Coaches
Cadel Evans (Cyclist racing in the tour dé France!)
Vanda Jones (good friend)
Jane Quinn (another good friend)
People going through challenges
My clients (sorry cannot name you all! :) )
My past clients who are living authentically

ok that is a good start, so how about you? what inspires you to be your best?

Winter Foods

noreply@blogger.com (Paola) — Wed, 01 Jul 2009 05:53:00 +0000

What is your favorite Winter Meal? I guess with our winter here I am inspired to talk about food. Lately for me it is about nice creamy soups, so easy to make and served with a crusty roll it is the way to go. Plus being a pechetarian I like the variety of vegies and fish out there. I know my husband prefers potatoes and meat dish. He is easy to please though and will enjoy what I am making, I guess being the main cook in the family you pick what you like more often than not.

I also like scones, pastries and naughty desserts during winter, perhaps my body is telling me to eat up, as I do need the extra calories for breastfeeding. Love the excuse and hope to use this for a while yet. What else do I Like for winter?

Raclette is a favorite, it is melted cheese cooked on a grill with garlic bread, potatoes and condiments. It is very European, the Swiss/French/Germans love Raclette, the Germans add more condiments than their neighbours, gerkins, onions, chicken, egg whatever that can be grilled I suppose. It is a very social meal as you gather around the 6-8 person grill and do your own cheese. It is divine.

Easy to prepare and easy to eat, you need to wash it down with vino and a glass of kirsch afterwards, this helps the cheese go down.

I also love hot chocolates during winter, with soy or rice milk. Yummy

So what do you like to eat during winter?

Holding Pattern

noreply@blogger.com (Paola) — Mon, 29 Jun 2009 05:52:00 +0000

The other day our yoga teacher spoke about maintaining our practice and if we are just in a holding pattern, like those airplanes that just fly around using fuel as they cannot land just yet, they are in a holding pattern. So I thought about my own practice and to be honest I was doing just that, maintaining my status quo and not pushing any further.

In life we also do this, not just in our exercise regime, we can easily just function on auto-pilot mode and ride the day. In fact you can just stay in this holding pattern and wait to be rescued. How many people do you know do just that?

I used to know a few, now as I am on the path of personal growth I only circulate with people who are challenging themselves and keep learning, this is my current environment and this is what I attract.

So honestly ask yourself if you are on a holding pattern? and I challenge you to do something about it!

Be Ok with the Unknown

noreply@blogger.com (Paola) — Wed, 24 Jun 2009 07:30:00 +0000

Speaking to a client today I was reminded that some seek the answers to their current dilemma. As I mentioned to her, she has the answers we just need to explore what is happening in her life right now and explore options. She needs to act on her choices and as a Life Coach we just shine the torch on how we see it, we may make suggestions sure, however you are responsible for your happiness.

So being ok with the unknown is a good thing. It is exciting to go down the path of not knowing, that is the journey of life. We may never fully know as our tastes change and also our circumstances, the most important thing is the now and being happy at work, home and in our personal lives. When we explore one area we are really opening the way to other areas in our lives as we give ourselves permission to open up, become more aware and explore new possibilities.

First though, you need to be positive, if all you do is get negative about why it doesn't work, that becomes your reality, so focus on what is good in your life, be grateful for what you have, the people in your life. Give thanks.

I get excited when clients say 'I don't know that is why I am seeing you '. Like I have the crystal ball, the answer on page 54!

I help you see your own truth, one that is authentic and real to you.

Exciting New Look

noreply@blogger.com (Paola) — Mon, 22 Jun 2009 09:06:00 +0000

After looking at what we could improve,we decided to re-vamp the website. It is now new and improved version. Sometimes you need to re-invent yourself to feel fresh and alive and after launching clickalifecoach in Jan 2007, we decided this was the time. On a personal note how often do we change our 'look' I know speaking from experience every few years I go for a new hair cut and feel like a different women, sure it is just 'hair' however sometimes that is all you need a subtle change can do wonders to your confidence and your appeal.

That is why we decided to update our services, to offer a polished website with easy to navigate tools and resources. In the next week or so we are still updating some content so if you see any additional things you would like to see, send us an email and leave some feedback. After all we are servicing people from all walks of life. Some focus on the colours whereas others need to connect with the content. We are factoring all this plus providing added value with our articles and naturally our complimentary 45 minute sessions.

Let me know what you think?

Part 2 Tips for Maximising Your Small Business

noreply@blogger.com (Paola) — Fri, 19 Jun 2009 05:36:00 +0000

As requested, there is the missing half, welcome any comments or thoughts. Happy weekend all..

6. Create a network. As a small business it can be a lonely road. So build a network of supporters. Join your association related to your profession, get active. Create a group of like-minded individuals and share stories, offer support and collaborate.

7. Believe in abundance, be grateful for what you already have and feel more clients coming your way. Create the opportunities in your mind and put that feeling out there.

8. Look at all your current clients and offer them something extra, give them more value as they will spread the word about your offerings. They are your biggest fans.

9. Trim unnecessary expenses. Look at your outgoings and analyse them, are you getting a benefit or return on your investment. For example you may be using the same supplier and it maybe wise to re-negotiate the terms and get better service/price. Shop around so your business benefits.

10. Have fun. You got into business for a reason. Re-ignite those reasons and look for more opportunities outside your comfort zone. Clients are waiting to work with you.

At the end of the day you need to feel satisfied and have a sense of accomplishment, you have helped people, gained new insights and made connections. Make it your intention to have this every working day.

Tips on Maximising your small business

noreply@blogger.com (Paola) — Mon, 15 Jun 2009 23:46:00 +0000

For whatever reason you have decided to start your own business: You are now the master of your destiny and believe that what you offer will be of great value to your clients. Plus this provides you with the flexibility and the ownership that comes with your own business. See this as a successful business and not just a small business. Your language will help you create abundance and give you the right mindset for success.

Working with individuals who have their own creations, I have come across some themes that will benefit others on a similar path. Keep in mind the reasons why you are in business; be on a mission to be passionate with new prospects, enquiries and you will create productive energy in your work day.

Here are my Top Ten Tips:

1. Begin each day with a smile. Be in state everyday, being in your element and present to your work. Have a mantra that you say to yourself every morning like: I am on a mission and happy to go to work.

2. Create Balance: Ensuring you are not clocking more hours than necessary in your business, remember it is about working smarter not longer that will produce results.

3. Delegate. As a business owner you most likely undertake all those business related activities and some you are not necessarily good at. Take Bookkeeping for instance, delegate this to the professionals. This will create more time for those activities you enjoy.

4. At the start of each week have a TO DO LIST. And structure your day to give you as many successes possible. Chasing emails and having little structure just creates more chaos.

5. Be your Brand. You hear this often in marketing, you are your own business, so take a good look at your immediate environment, your wardrobe, stationary, your electronic signature, any collateral that goes to clients. Send a clear consistent message.

(I will post the other five tips in a few days....)

Help is Coming

noreply@blogger.com (Paola) — Tue, 09 Jun 2009 03:59:00 +0000

When people help other people for no hidden agenda but to simply help that person, this is a selfish less act, altruistic in nature. I always considered myself as an altruistic person, volunteering at different organizations and working at camps for children with disabilities, I loved it giving to others, and this made me feel good in the process. Sometimes doing something like this gives you perspective on how good your life really is. If by the act of helping someone you give them an opportunity, something they would not have had without your assistance.

I have been the receiver of this recently, and I am so deeply touched by this, I feel so grateful for people like him, to offer something so precious to us and to allow us to dream about what will be. Only days prior I was sad about the prospect of no help coming our way, but a complete stranger stepped in and has changed our future. He does not really know us, so I guess the energy I put out there many times over has come back to us, tenfold.

I am grateful to have this chance, a possibility of having our dream come true,

So if you are wondering how you can be more altruistic in nature, look around you, someone is waiting for the chance, and if you have the resources and can spare the energy, you will be accumulating ‘brownie points’ for later on in your life, as you just never know if you will be needing a lending hand in your later years

Hot Lemon, Ginger and Honey

noreply@blogger.com (Paola) — Mon, 08 Jun 2009 04:03:00 +0000

Originally uploaded by The Lensman, Bala

Yes it has hit us all in the family, the cold and sniffles. It is that time of the year when people get sick and unfortunately we were not immune. So we have been drinking hot lemon drinks with ginger and honey. It is amazing how much more tired you feel as the cold goes through your system. Perhaps this is a sign to take it easy and let your body recover.

As we are usually so busy chasing our tails, having a cold/flu makes you literally slow down and take stock. Everything else is secondary as you recuperate and recover. The body repairs itself and so all you need is time. Allow yourself to take time out to do just that.

If you do not take time out, your body will feel worse for wear and you will feel even worse as a result of just ignoring the signs. So take it from us, s l o w down and just nurture yourself.

What home remedies to do use during this winter period to flight the cold and sniffles?

Simply Living, in our dreams..

noreply@blogger.com (Paola) — Wed, 03 Jun 2009 05:57:00 +0000

Yes he is back from his 5 days of being in the elements and how wonderful to have my family all together again. I survived 5 days with my little baby and it was an empowering couple of days. I motivated myself to stay busy and to ensure I had some down-time too. It makes it easier having a delightful and easy baby, she is so accommodating as long as she is fed,changed and has regular siestas, she is a content little bee! Just imagine how wonderful that would be to have such basic needs.

We can live simply and be content with that, just thinking about simplicity makes me smile as living in todays'society everything is about choice, getting overwhelmed with work, more work stresses and financial headaches. There is nothing simple about that! We want to do more in our day, multi-task more and can be contacted 24/7! When do you relax and wind-down?

In our sleep, I guess.

So we want it all don't we? The lifestyle the relationship and the family. We want to create more abundance and have the resources to pursue our goals. Yes we feel this is our right in this modern world, anything is possible if you believe long enough and are prepared to do whatever it takes. Believe me it is possible so when you come across anybody that puts you down (you let them do that to you BTW) know that you can choose to feel different and stay on your path of excellence.

Bon Voyage

noreply@blogger.com (Paola) — Fri, 29 May 2009 08:21:00 +0000

Today my husband went on a little trip, only for 4 days and as we dropped him off, I felt my heart fall to the ground and became a little teary. Weird, only 4 days I told myself and he will be back and yet I missed him already. Love makes you feel so vunerable and emotional. Sure I want him to have some time out, he deserves this little getaway and when he returns he will be more relaxed and excited to see us.

The heart grows fonder as they say. Having time away is good as we learn to appreciate each other and give each other space to learn and grow. As individuals it is important after all we are not glued at the hips! We need to be inter-dependent and not co-dependent. I realise that my relationship with my husband is the most important relationship I will ever have. Naturally with our daughter it will be different she will leave us one day whereas my life partner will be by my side for as long as we live.

I am grateful for what we have, for what we have achieved already and what we do each day, create our destiny and enjoy those moments being parents. Priceless.

So darling, have a bon voyage, miss your heaps already, we look forward to hearing about all your adventures out at sea.

Moment Of Truth

noreply@blogger.com (Paola) — Tue, 26 May 2009 04:05:00 +0000

This morning I attended a talk about customer retention and I was so impressed by the speaker. She was a delight to listen to, she had many years of experience and a story teller par extra-ordinaire! So when she spoke about the collective experiences that she calls 'moment of truths'. This makes or breaks a service industry. Like most of us are in just that 'servicing our customers' In Japan customer translates to honoured guest in your home. How refreshing to see customers this way. I know from all my customer relationship work done in the past, I have always been customer-focused and ensuring good a relationship.

Obviously I have let this slip over the years and today was my moment of truth. What do I need to do to take better care of my honoured guests? I guess from an online perspective I need to listen more and give them what they want. So if you are reading this and you are a member. I encourage you to give me some kind of sign or feedback so we know we are giving you what you need and want from this service.

If you do reply, I would be delighted to have a personal chat with you and give you some one-on-one coaching via Skype

You may say, she does that anyway, giving a complimentary session. Well yes I do that however I am willing to give you this session over 2 weeks. So you can get some momentum and more value. We all value time and this way 2 x 30 mins will give you more support to really get back on track.

After all we need to think about what gives more value in everything we do. Our mission is to be excellent in online coaching, and that begins with right now.

Que Serra Serra

noreply@blogger.com (Paola) — Sat, 23 May 2009 08:17:00 +0000

What will be will be.. Wise words. Sometimes all we want is a different outcome and we want it to be so. Yet we need to just let go and let it be. Then we can really enjoy that moment. If we are too caught up in our expectations we are not in the now we are projecting into the future and what we want instead.

This type of thinking doesn't really serve us as we are trying to meet our expectations in the process. Eventually we just get caught in it all and go around and around. Then that moment passes and we wonder why we didn't really enjoy it.

Go figure. When we are busy in our heads we stop being in the moment. It is easy to say I know as often times I too will be thinking what is next, and then after that...I literally need to place a STOP sign in my view for me to take stock of the situation, let go, and enjoy that moment.

I know my mum lives in the past, she has a brilliant memory and can recall the minute details of all those years ago. What she does is she visits that memory time and time again, until she has memorised it. All the while not living in the now. She goes into the past and plays it back a like a slow-motion movie. Never missing a detail.

que serra serra whatever will be will be que serra serra...

Take A Chill Pill

noreply@blogger.com (Paola) — Tue, 19 May 2009 05:22:00 +0000

How often do we run around attempting to get everything done and perfect?? Speaking from personal experience I tend to do this often. I will just do this and this and then I can sit down. Now running around is nothing new to me, I actually like to be organised and busy, gives me a sense of purpose. By the days'end I feel I have accomplished a few things and have a sense of satisfaction. So there is some system to my thinking and doing. However if you just keep this up and do not sit down and smell the roses you will just deplete yourself out of energy in so many ways. I know I was there once, thinking I was 'superwoman'.

So taking a chill pill is a good thing, You become focused on the now and not what is coming up next you take the next moment with a conscious breathe and you stay there just being there with whatever comes up for you.

Perfect, and being so real in the now makes you realise that you create each moment and decide if you enjoy it or not. Is this the reality you envisioned? If not then when will you be on track? There is always the present to get it going and noticing your environment and what changes you need to make to really be in a happy state.

Slowing down is necessary in today's society, as you become aware of what you want you make that choice.

So what choice will you make today?

Too Many Details

noreply@blogger.com (Paola) — Thu, 14 May 2009 08:12:00 +0000

Originally uploaded by St. Louis Pilgrimage to Poland

How many people just get bogged down with the finer details? I mean just yesterday listening to a conversation, he went on and on about the most mundane of details, to the most micro level possible. Surely he was having me on? Alas no he was totally serious and he wanted to discuss all possible outcomes.

Not sure about you but this type of discussion is SO PAINFUL to me, I am a big picture get the facts, make a decision and move on type of person. So being forced to go through the minute details and at length, provided me with thoughts of strangling the speaker, blocking my ears and nodding yes yes. Or just walking out.

I was diplomatic and nodded to his ramblings, because by this stage that is what they were to me just ramblings. To him they were necessary deliberations as they held a clue to the next piece in the puzzle. WHAT? there is more I thought..

So if you get bogged down with the detail, think about your audience and if you need their input and buy-in make sure you listen to the cues and not just keep on your own agenda! You need to figure out how they need this information, quick and easy, long and painful (just kidding) and accommodate your spiel. Otherwise you will loose your audience and wonder why they do not call you~!

Happy Mothers' Day

noreply@blogger.com (Paola) — Mon, 11 May 2009 02:34:00 +0000

So you got your mum flowers? Great and even a card, telling her you appreciate those little things that she does for you? Wonderful. Yesterday was the day when some mums got a sleep-in, others got a special breakfast and others well they even got presents. In the news yesterday it is estimated that a full-time mum (haven't heard of a part-time one?) if they were to get a wage it would be around 160K a year! Imagine that, getting that amount of money whilst doing what you love..

For me being a mum is a joy, a passion and each day I am filled with appreciation and love. No amount of money would quantify that no matter how you put it. Being a mum means you put others first and watch them grow before your very eyes, amazing transformation. You share, teach, watch and let go.

I was treated with pancakes for breakfast, a card and got lots of cuddles during the day. Priceless!

So how did you celebrate mother's day?

Pushing Your Limits

noreply@blogger.com (Paola) — Wed, 06 May 2009 07:25:00 +0000

Just recently I was in a deep conversation with a client who just kept going for her goals, she was so focused and knew that with perserverance and discipline she would get there. She pushed her limits on a daily basis. As her coach I felt a little bit useless, as usually I am the one motivating the client to get up and get cracking on your goals! Funny she just wanted someone close to her to share it with and to use our sessions as brainstorming and accountability. Perfect I said.

When you intellectualise your goals and your action plan you can easily get distracted and bored. I have seen it in myself too when I am like this I just STOP take a deep breath and ask myself why am I stalling? I need to see the bigger picture of WHY this must be done and usually that is enough for me to keep going and pushing my limits.

It feels great to give it your all, I remember only too recently how I wanted something so BAD that I was on a mission, my sole purpose was to achieve it and it took a few years, yet every attempt to get it made me more humble and determined to get it, like a hungry animal, salivating I did not give up. With this experience I know I can achieve more..

So PUSH yourself as much as you can, you will amaze yourself with the results.

May-BE

noreply@blogger.com (Paola) — Sat, 02 May 2009 09:16:00 +0000

Originally uploaded by jkdigitalservices

How often do you hear the word 'maybe'? It suggests a potential possiblity however often it is used as a hesitation an objection. When we use words like these we tread on the side of caution. Other words which give you a similar feeling are: 'if'and 'but'. With 'but' however you feel that there is an objection to whatever was said prior, this resistence doesn't make you feel very empowered at all.

Watching your language is important as these reflect your thoughts they are directly correlated and if you feel 'maybe', 'but' then you are not in a place of power and light you are preventing yourself from that experience on some level.

The word 'if' is an interesting one, it implies a condition, if this happens then this will occur. A cause and effect.For example 'If I get the raise I can go on holidays' This can make the situation loose/loose as you place boundaries on that condition.

Again language is so powerful, if you run the program every day of dis-empowered words then you behave in this manner and wonder why you don't feel so good about your situation. Think about those words you use everyday and begin with more powerful alternatives. Ones that come to mind are:

I will
There is a possibility
Perhaps
Yes and for the BUT word how about you use AND as a joining word or 'however'. And begin to feel different about the way you communicate and observe the new outcomes open to you..

Make Mistakes

noreply@blogger.com (Paola) — Wed, 29 Apr 2009 12:14:00 +0000

Originally uploaded by artzy.viva

During a coaching session this evening, I suggested to my client that to make as many mistakes as he can.

You see to make mistakes is to learn and the sooner you make them the quicker you can get on your feet and on the way to skill mastery. Funny we live in a society that mistakes are not tolerated and here I am giving suggestions to do just that! We can learn from other people's mistake that is true yet to have a direct and longer lasting impact we too need to trip up. This way we own our learnings and this motivates us to do something different next time.

So mistakes mean we are moving in the right direction, and coaching does just that! Move in the right direction and consciously as you are on purpose and you have full awareness.

You can minimise mistakes and cover them up, that too I have seen, however taking ownership and accountability is where the power is as you acknowledge your error and can then move on.

Mistakes are like wake-up calls we get immediate feedback and adjust accordingly. That is why is it refered to behaviour modification!

So make mistakes, smile, get the learnings and move on...

Family Ties

noreply@blogger.com (Paola) — Mon, 27 Apr 2009 07:17:00 +0000

Over the weekend we attended a family get-together. The occasion, a birthday celebration and as usual there was plenty to eat and drink. Family ties bring us all together and enjoy each others'company.

You can just relax when you are in such a loving environment. It took me back to the days when I was still a child and had to weave through the adult legs to find my parents. On one occasion I still remember grabing a man's hand thinking he was my papi, and agast he was not! I still can remember the horror I felt as I was such a shy and introverted little girl.

As they say we can choose our friends but not our family, that is why we need to be tolerant and love unconditionally, just accept and enjoy the points we have in common. We have a shared history and have come a long way in our development. Sure we can be stark opposites yet can still hold a conversation.

Loving unconditionally can be challenging yet we need to practise this to let them grow and get the learnings, whatever they maybe!

Sitting, Waiting, Wishing

noreply@blogger.com (Paola) — Thu, 23 Apr 2009 13:07:00 +0000

Originally uploaded by Silvia de Luque

In these times many people are placing their dreams on hold. As they are in fear of what the future will bring. They feel that it is too turbulent to get started with new ventures, like changing jobs, starting a family, changing relationships, travelling. Like waiting for more favorable times with a guarantee. Well in life there are no guarantees and we cannot wait and just live in hope for better times (well we can however this does nothing for our happiness levels). TO LIVE is to have risk and to be living in the now. So why wait?

Waiting is a choice, and you micro manage your activities looking for the signs of improvement. The indicators of 'better times' can vary and are dependent on the external. You are just on the sidelines being an observer of life and not an active participant.

So why wait?

There is magic in action and doing what makes you happy. If you crave a better job, then go out there and find it! Create it if you have to, just move from your current reality. You want to change something but not sure what do to first? Then find a life coach and have a discussion around that, you obviously need support and a sounding board.

If you just wait for the external to improve you are simply giving your power away, as you become disempowered in the process. Wouldn't it be better to take life by the horns and get on with living and being proactive in life.

The choice is yours!

What is Recession Proof ?

noreply@blogger.com (Paola) — Tue, 21 Apr 2009 04:46:00 +0000

Most of us are affected, whatever industry we are in, there is an impact. People are not spending as much as before, they are looking at their expenses and trimming costs and luxuries. So what is recession proof?

Well having a baby means you need things that you didn't need before and we tend to put our childrens'needs before our own. So anything to do with babies, then I would guess would not be as affected by the recession or the current tough economic climate. So if you are in this type of business then work on getting more clients and keeping them. As babies grow they will need more clothes, furniture, developmental products so when you get a new customer have them join your loyality program,e-newsletters, etc and keep updating them of new offerings, specials and sales.

What else? Well we all still need to eat and shop. So I recommend to the big retailers to offer bulk discount for items. People love a bargain and will spend more if they can see a definite saving. Again work on introducing loyality programs and people will stay with you.

If you are a service provider then you need to work at keeping your clients as nowadays people are smart shoppers and will negotiate a better deal. Just the other day my husband researched the price for a new car seat for our 4 month old. He saw a great online price and asked the local baby store to match it. They got close and we purchased! People will negotiate in these times so, use this skill to drive your dollar further.

So there are many industries that are flourishing right now, that is wonderful for them, so keep your customer service satisfaction high and people will be loyal clients...

Be Different

noreply@blogger.com (Paola) — Wed, 15 Apr 2009 06:29:00 +0000

Interesting many of us want the same things, we want a good partner, to have a family, secure job and home and have annual holidays with those loved ones. Simple really we crave to conform and be like everybody else. This gives us the feeling of being like the rest of our fellow neighbours and we blend in.

This is how it goes for the majority of people. This is the program most of us run and keep on running. Well that is great, I am not here to judge just simply light the torch on individuality. You can want the same things, and then go about getting them in different ways. Being different has its'layers of individuality. As we attract different people, we enjoy doing different things and travelling to unique places.

It is in the HOW that we put our own individual touch. We are creative and the path is varied, the destination can be the same, yet we are all unique thus the path reflects this.

Being different is refreshing and being aware of other choices out there..

Embrace your individually, it is perfect just the way it is!

Emotional Intelligence

noreply@blogger.com (Paola) — Wed, 08 Apr 2009 02:43:00 +0000

Originally uploaded by David Paul Ohmer

It is interesting that we can be smart in so many ways, practical,successful in the work place, realistic and applied, yet when it comes to emotional intelligence some people just haven't got a clue!

Just the other day, I came across a professional executive, on the outside it appeared that he had it all, success, allure, opportunities and stability. However when we spoke about matters of the heart and emotions, he was still in infancy stage, he could not see outside his ego or his environment. His model of the world was self-absorbed and he needed to control everything! I know that sounds harsh, I mean we cannot control everything! Yet his mission was to do just that. Obviously this black and white thinking didn't give him much room to move when meeting people especially members of the opposite sex. Ultimately it was his way, or get out of my way. This is a loose/loose way of thinking as we cannot box people into our model and expect them to be happy about it.

To be in control you need to be out of control, if you know what I mean. You need to

TRUST
LET GO
SURRENDER to the universe
BELIEVE
BE SUPPORTIVE
LOVE UNCONDITIONALLY

I know this is asking for a lot from someone who expects people to follow, the thing is we all need to follow our own path, and this means making mistakes and learning from them. This is the only way we learn and grow, it is called FEED BACK after all.

As that great Sting song goes, "IF YOU LOVE SOMEBODY, SET THEM FREE!" how true is that! unconditionally as this allows them to spread their wings and be the best that they can be, no limitations.