While there are many upsides to owning a Nook eBook reader over the competition, the biggest downside is the fact that you cannot buy any books whatsoever through the device, unless you have a valid US credit card and an address. While in today’s times, that might not be too difficult to arrange, it is still a downside one must consider. Kindle has access to the Kindle Store India and one can easily purchase books and load them onto the device.

Now that I owned an eBook reader, the main task at hand was to load it with books even though I had no access to the Barnes and Noble online store. I picked up hard bound copies of the books I already owned. A quick search on some of the torrent websites and I was able to locate their eBooks. While I cannot comment on the legality of my actions, I simply know that I already own the content and wanted it in a different format for my personal consumption.

Downloading the .EPUB files and putting them on the device memory or the memory card is called side-loading. Once I had side-loaded the books I owned, I went back to the torrent search engines to randomly look for stuff that would be interesting. Just as is the case with music and movies, tens and thousands of eBooks are pirated over the Bit Torrent protocol. You don’t need to be a rocket scientist to figure out how to download. Just google the relevant stuff and you shall be set. You could download entire collections, uploaded by dedicated pirates or search for specific titles.

I did manage to download some books illegally but never got down to putting them on the device. I wanted to see what legal options I had as a resident of India.

First up is Project Gutenberg (http://www.gutenberg.org/). This is a vast collection (more than 42000 books) of classics, old books whose copyright has expired and are now free for distribution.
A good example is A Tale of Two Cities by Charles Dickens (http://www.gutenberg.org/ebooks/98). You are free to read the book online or download the same in a variety of formats for consumption through various devices. eBooks are available in .HTML, .EPUB, .MOBI etc. formats for reading on various devices, phones and tablets. Once you get your hands dirty and start exploring various other options, you will realize that many other vendors offer these books for free through their respective channels.

I realized then that the availability of internationally acclaimed titles and foreign authors is easy. What if I wanted to read a novel by a Desi Indian author? Looking around, I got the news that the Google Play Store (https://play.google.com/books) had recently started offering purchase of eBooks through its Play Store online or through any Android device. I was keen to test out this source and immediately whipped out my Android phone and fired up the Play Store. The news was correct and the Play Store showed a large number of books by Indian and Foreign authors available for download through the application. A book once purchased can be read through an app on Android, iOS and through the browser or a dedicated application (Adobe Digital Editions) on a desktop.
I decided to purchase the newly published The Oath of the Vayuputras by Amish Tripathi (https://play.google.com/store/books/details/Amish_Tripathi_The_Oath_of_the_Vayuputras?id=HYnyxy2dFAkC). While I purchased the book through my smartphone (₹ 189), I later realized it’s best to purchase the book via a PC. As you would see if you opened the link for the book, not only are you shown the details and price of the book as on the phone app, you are also shown the format in which the eBook is available. Scanned Pages is your regular .PDF file while Flowing Text is the .EPUB version.
Purchased books are instantly available for reading on your phones and tablets configured with the Google Account you used to purchase the eBook. Opening the Play Store on your PC allows you to download the eBook for offline viewing and loading on other devices as well. Google provides simple and clear instructions on how to go about doing the same in its FAQs.
Google has a vast collection of Indian and Foreign titles available for download in either PDF or EPUB format.

Next stop was the Amazon Kindle Store India (http://amazon.com/kindlestoreindia). Amazon allows customers to directly purchase books for their Kindle readers in Indian Rupee. You can purchase and push books wirelessly to your Kindle devices or smartphone apps available for iOS, Android etc. Offline downloads are also available through the Kindle application for Windows. Amazon uses a variety of formats for its eBooks (.MOBI, .AZW3). For testing purposes, I purchased Ignited Minds by A.P.J. Abdul Kalam (http://www.amazon.com/Ignited-Minds-ebook/dp/B008X3PAX8). The book cost me ₹ 75.70 and was instantly available on all devices where I had the Kindle reader configured. I could choose the device where I wanted to push the book to and I selected my Desktop client. The file was available in the .AZW3 format.

Landmark Limited which runs physical book stores in the country also has an online website for purchasing eBooks (http://www.landmarkonthenet.com/ebooks/). The website offered downloads of the latest published books in the EPUB and PDF formats, with each book clearly specifying the format of the purchase. What is surprising here is that Landmark is selling eBooks by foreign authors, out of copyright to its visitors as well for a steep price. The example here is The Importance of Being Earnest by Oscar Wilde. While Landmark sells the eBook here (http://www.landmarkonthenet.com/the-importance-of-being-earnest-by-oscar-wilde-ebooks-23523347/) for ₹ 400, the eBook can be downloaded for free through the Project Gutenberg website (http://www.gutenberg.org/ebooks/844). Landmark offers a reading application for Android devices. The service is essentially like the one offered through the Google Play Store, although it has limited official options for reading (only an Android app) but it allows for downloads to be consumed through the PC or standalone eBook readers using the Adobe Digital Editions software.

My final stop was the website of the eCommerce venture Infibeam (http://www.infibeam.com/eBooks/). Infibeam’s offering is similar to the one described for Landmark. Infibeam offers no application for any platform. It relies on software by Adobe or Microsoft for consumption of the books on computers and their onward transmission (if possible) to standalone readers.

Something very vital worth mentioning here is that all these eBooks have some form of DRM implemented on them that allows the publisher/vendor to control how the eBook is read. The intended objective of these vendors is not just to supply you with the content but also a device that enables the consumption of that content. While Google sells the Nexus 7 officially in India through the Play Store, Amazon sells its Kindle range of eBook readers and Infibeam has its own Pi/Pi2 eBook reader. What device you end up using for reading purposes is entirely upto you. I, as mentioned at the start of this article, use a Nook to read all the eBooks that I download. The official B&N Nook store does not allow me to buy eBooks since I reside outside the US. The only legal options I have are the ones listed above. But with the DRM in place on all purchases, it becomes a challenge transferring your eBook to a third-party reader such as the Nook.

While this may be illegal, there are definite ways to strip this DRM off the purchased eBooks and convert them to various formats for reading on different devices. I and many others rely on a desktop software called Calibre (http://calibre-ebook.com/). Calibre not only allows you to maintain a systematic digital library on your computer, it can communicate with a vast number of e-reading devices. With use of some plugins (google Apprentice Alf, visit the blog, download the plugin set and carefully go through the FAQs), the software is able to strip DRM off most of the purchases. It then enables conversion of your eBooks to different formats which you may transfer to as many devices you have without the need to purchase a separate copy for every device through its respective eBook store. I would again not like to comment on the legality of this practice. You may follow the same at your own risk. I feel comfortable knowing that the the eBook I purchased is there for my reading anywhere, anytime just like a normal hard bound would be.

I’d like to give a special mention to the Android only app RockStand. RockStand not only allows for purchase of English language eBooks through its mobile application, it has a surprisingly loaded collection of magazines and regional language books on offer. Although I have not purchased any book through this service, I believe the download is a scanned PDF. I came to this conclusion after downloading the full March 2013 issue of FHM through the app for free. The final download was a scanned PDF, that I was able to copy to my PC and view through the Adobe Reader as well. RockStand seems to be an excellent resource for downloading free and paid magazines (local languages as well as English).

A high profile domestic eBook vendor that I have not mentioned in the above list is Flipkart. While Flipkart offers a vast collection of eBooks, it offers them in its own proprietary DRM-ed format (.FKB). I believe that stands for fucking bullshit. That’s because I see no reason for Flipkart to ape Amazon and go for its own format for publishing. The books purchased from Flipkart are readable only through an Android application. Since the format is proprietary, there are no known methods to remove the DRM or convert the file purchased to a regular .EPUB. Thus, at the moment I cannot recommend Flipkart to anyone. Even the free eBooks on offer were protected and wrapped in their own file format.

Although there may be many other options, ways and methods to purchase and read eBooks in India, the above currently seem the safest and easiest to me. As a tip, I would recommend searching for a title on all the four eBook stores I’ve mentioned. For every book I compared, the price varied across all the stores. Just purchase from the store where it is the cheapest. Using some of the tools mentioned in the article, you can easily convert the purchased books to different formats. In my case, even though my Nook doesn’t officially support any of these online book stores, I’m able to legally purchase, download and using some controversial tools and methods, can load the books onto the Nook for reading.

Still, before you start purchasing, it’s just safer to do your own research for the device of your choice. Happy reading!

With Kings of Leon speaking to me of Revelry, I put the seventh cigarette in my mouth. I am counting. I am waiting… Waiting for the nicotine coupled with the beer to show its effect… Waiting for it to drown me into a deep, dreamless sleep. Sitting on one corner of the bed with my head dropped low, I look at my heart that lies on the floor. Each time I press my lips to the tobacco stick and pull in the smoke, I can feel a part of that heart turn to ash.

Sleep eludes me. Over the years, I have carefully nursed the thought within me. I give it my undivided attention, feed it my emotions and let it take over my soul. I love it unconditionally – the feelings usually reserved by parents for their offspring; the same feelings my parents exhibit towards me. Atleast that’s what I like to think.

I hear her tip-toe her way into the room, careful not to disturb me. Those tiny little feet, with perfectly shaped toes are enough to distract me. I take another drag of the cigarette, the orange glow from the tip being the only light in the room.

She sits besides me, her small, feminine hands caressing my hair. I can feel the warmth from her body light a fire inside of me, melting my insides. She draws her face close to mine. Her breath on my face is the only sensation I’ve felt in the last two hours. I still can’t turn and look at her. God knows, I want to. But he knows the truth. I know the truth. Even she knows the truth. That’s what always makes it difficult.

She takes out another cigarette from the pack and places it between my fingers. With a familiar click, the wall in front of me lights up. She brings the lighter towards me, clasping it between her tiny fingers, gesturing me to get on with business. I place the cigarette in my mouth and she lights it up for me. As I suck in the hot smoke, I feel the tension ease a bit, for the first time in these last few hours. Her presence is enough to make me feel better. She loves me. Perhaps, the only one who does.

Each night, she practices this routine. Each night, she comes over to make me feel special. Each night, she lights me up like a lamp.

Halfway through the cigarette, calmness descends upon me. I do not feel any guilt. I’ve stopped counting but I still look at the floor as a result of the alcohol draining my neck muscles of all strength. She knows she has done her job. My lips only move to inhale and exhale the smoke… Never to thank her. She knows it is time to go.

As she proceeds to leave, her back towards me, I strain to set my neck straight and catch a glimpse of her four-foot frame. She hurries towards the door, wearing the same yellow dress. I look carefully to see if there are any blood stains. There aren’t. I smile. Somehow, each time I wake up in the morning, I get a vision of her lying on the road outside the house, in the blood-soaked yellow dress. I get these flashes of her, calling out to her father, calling out to me… Running behind me in a futile attempt to stop me from leaving the house after finding her mother drunk out of her senses, yet again, lost in her own revelry. Like I said, she’s the only one who loves me. But as always, I don’t look at her.

I walk across the street, light up a cigarette and try to forget what I saw inside the house. Then I hear a familiar click. Only this time, it sounds more like sudden car horn followed by the sound of a crash. I finally turn around. I don’t see her face. It’s under the car. But I see her body in yellow dress, which is turning red with the oozing blood.

The song changes to Angus & Julia Stone’s I’m not Yours. For the first time in these last few hours, I speak. I sing along.

Light me up a cigarette and put it in my mouth / You’re the only one that wants me around…

I finish my cigarette. I throw my body back on the bed, running my hand over the sheet where she sat a few minutes ago. Still warm. I smile, wanting to linger in this moment forever and not waking up next morning to that ‘nightmare’. I love her.

She loves me. Perhaps, the only one who does.

Each night, I wait for her. Each night, she practices this routine. Each night, she comes over to make me feel special. Each night, she lights me up like a lamp.

The Night, is what I live for.

But it is only during that time, you realise that the momentary benefit of locking one’s emotions is dwarfed by the pain one will feel for years to come. Maybe even for the entire duration of your existence. Time doesn’t heal. It only freezes a part of you, which melts during these moments and then switches back to its cold state some moments later. This vicious cycle, never ends. Never.

My family has been a Nokia customer since the time of Nokia 5110. There was a time, when every single member of our household owned not one, but multiple Nokia phones. There was not an N-Series or E-Series phone that I did not buy even if it meant changing the phone every month. My relationship with Nokia and its associated ecosystem has been a very strong one. Now, the only Nokia phone in the family is a basic model with a “torchlight”.

I personally gave up on Nokia after using the E72. It pains me to see where Nokia is headed, not just globally but in India as well. The company which during its days of glory, set the market on fire with revolutionary touch devices (way ahead of their times) and phones with an operating system that gave them unmatched power is so blind that it cannot even see the way ahead.

I bought a Nokia Lumia 800 on the 17th of December and had it replaced exactly a week later on the 24th of December, 2011. If you would ask me what I really wanted to do, it was to get a full refund. I don’t know if your own employees and channel partners know what the success of this phone means to the future of this company and what exactly is at stake here.

Once I’d lodged a complaint via email on December 20th, 2011 after I came to know Nokia had acknowledged problems with the Nokia Lumia 800, I received a call the next day from Mr. N***** Gupta, who promptly assured me of a replacement on 23rd, December from the Nokia Priority Store in Sector 16, Faridabad. I left work to reach the store only to be told there was no stock available till 27th December. I again called up Mr. N*****, who assured me of the replacement by 1.30PM 24th December. I reached the store at 2PM only to be informed again that the replacement was not in order. It was only after I called up Mr. N***** again and waited for another 40 minutes that I could go back home with a new handset.

When I enquired at the store about the cause of the delay, I was told that they had received instructions for replacement but were unable to execute the instructions since they were not being supplied with the new stock, a problem that squarely lies with YOUR distribution. You sell your customers instruments that barely work for 5 hours on a single charge, that have fancy features like Turn-by-turn navigation systems etc., which can never be used because the phone does not have enough power to deliver what it promises.

I was once a loyal Nokia customer, spending my money on devices that your company made. When I got news of the Lumia 800 a few months back, I was willing to bet on Nokia again. And, I did. I have all current generation devices from all major handset makers but I chose to go with Nokia as my primary phone. Sad to say, but I think I made an extremely bad decision.

I had half a mind to take the replacement piece in a sealed box and sell it outside in the market at a loss. Being an early adopter of the device and the platform, I do get requests from people for reviews and there isn’t a person I have recommended this phone to till now. It’s not because the device is faulty anymore. It’s beautifully designed & has an extremely capable operating system. It’s just that I personally DO NOT TRUST NOKIA ANYMORE. And the blame rests not with the faulty device I bought. The blame does not lie in the fact that I got my replacement a day late. The trust is lost because I can see that your employees and your partners are oblivious of what your company stands for. They are directionless and don’t see how crucial the success of this device is for Nokia. They are content with getting their salaries and treating the customer in an apathetic manner, for which your Nokia Care centres and stores are now famous.

You grew exponentially, selling devices in large volumes, selling franchisees for Nokia stores and customer care centres. But you never really bothered to keep a check on anything. You never really bothered to check back with the customer. Your Nokia Care stores took phones from customers, kept them for weeks together, while the employees there used the phones personally and after their personal satisfaction, handed over the phones to unsuspecting customers with inflated invoices. I have personally had a Nokia N97 “destroyed” by employees at the Nokia Care in Sector 15, Faridabad and a Nokia N85 at Nokia Care, Sector 22, Chandigarh. I did not complain then. I treated them as isolated cases.

But what good is one’s association with a company which has lost faith in itself? Which has lost its touch with the customer? Mr. N***** told me that I would get a Bluetooth headset as a token of gesture from Nokia with the replacement. I would like to tell you that even if Nokia had given me this particular handset free of cost, the trust which has been shattered is beyond repair. I felt like dumping the handset in the recycle bin placed within the store because I felt betrayed by Nokia. No amount of monetary or material compensation can compensate for the lousy and pathetic attitude displayed by the employees of your company. Just to remind you, the Bluetooth headset in question was not given to me “SINCE IT IS NOT IN STOCK AT THE MOMENT”. And I have not signed the Letter of Satisfaction post the replacement.

This is your level of commitment towards those people who chose to unwisely invest in your products:

1. You sell them faulty product
2. You give delayed replacements
3. You mention gifts which will further be delayed

Can you guys spot a pattern? I can. A company which is failing. A company which issues orders at the top but has not communicated the vision at the bottom resulting in little action. A company whose channel partners don’t trust it. A company which cannot identify a loyal from a normal customer (because it never really cared in the past; the focus was solely on volumes). A company whose customers have no faith in it anymore.

I am writing this email to you, late in the night not because I have nothing better to do. It’s because I can see that I’m probably more passionate about your products than some people who work within your organization and are associated with it. It’s not about Rs. 30,000 which I now feel went down the drain. It’s more about the realisation that Nokia is sitting there, resting on its past glory. The employees are complacent. The sales staff is untrained. No amount of money you put into sales promotion can substitute for the existing customers that you will lose due to the prevailing attitude.

I can only hope that you guys realise, while there is still time. I don’t want your free headphones. I actually did not want a replacement. I wanted a refund. But as a one-time lover of Nokia products, I decided not to be so rigid. I don’t want phone calls from executives who don’t realise the importance of customers at this crucial time and I certainly don’t want replies to this email. Instead, by the time this month ends, I will dispose off your product and go back to the existing offerings from either Samsung, Blackberry or Apple, which I already own. They all have better specifications and work better. Most of all, the companies and their employees know the importance of maintaining relationships and have the desire to see their company progress rather than simply drawing fat salaries and resting on past laurels.

As a loyal customer, my duty was to give Nokia another chance. I did. Your product was faulty and you replaced it. It’s just that your entire approach at the execution level, which is heart-breaking. All the best.

I shall post a review of the Nokia Lumia 800 and my experience with it in a few days.

Like I mentioned in my original post, I’m really not what you would call a “metalhead”. I do listen to Metallica only because I like their music. I don’t worship them. I don’t idolize them. And yes, this was my first concert.

But having sat through the entire ordeal, waiting on the mats, complying with the organizers demands, it was so frustrating to hear the firang come up on stage and announce that Metallica wouldn’t perform, as if nothing had happened. If they couldn’t fix it, they shouldn’t have lied. Wasn’t it better to simply hand over some merchandise to the audience as a compensation than to have the audience get on stage and create chaos? No clarifications, no apologies and simply no crisis management. Things could’ve turned very, very ugly.

On top of that, I see people blaming Delhi for not having the kind of metal/rock culture such concerts demand. It’s sheer stupidity. Was Bangalore born with the rock scene? No. The culture slowly grew. Things take time to develop. If Delhi-tes can handle a world-class Metro, I’m sure they’re responsible enough to handle themselves in a gathering.

Then, they’re those who point out that abuses are a part of the entire experience and Delhi should go back to watching Mika performances. Well, had Mika uttered a “Ma ki”, “Behn ki” or “G@ndu” on a stage, people anywhere would’ve kicked his butt. Same goes for the firang. Just cause he chose words like “Fuckin’”, “Buttheads” doesn’t make it any less insulting. I, like everyone else PAID money to watch Metallica perform live. I wasn’t there for free. I wasn’t there to get insulted. I wasn’t there for a compromise. I wasn’t there because I thought it’d be a good opportunity to participate in a riot. When I paid, it was because of the promise of quality entertainment. In the end, I went home with an aching head/back and a fucked up head. My post wasn’t put online for some 15 minutes of fame. I needed an outlet to vent the frustration.

I just hope Bangalore has a better experience. And whether they, or any band for that matter returns to India, I really don’t care. There are some basic sentiments that everyone must appreciate. Metallica did not. And I blame them for that. DNA Networks proved that they’re nothing but a joke but Metallica proved to me that they don’t really care. It was like, alright kids, show’s cancelled, now scram! Don’t expect reasons. You won’t get any. Deal with it. Different places have different cultures and the organizers, the band and its crew should’ve duly taken note of that. You think McDonalds would’ve thrived in India had they served beef and pork, just because traditionally, it’s a HAMBURGER and not an Aaloo Burger? You take note of cultures, sentiments and you tweak yourself to adapt.

Its a simply producer-consumer analogy. That’s all. I don’t know shit about mosh pits and I don’t care what the rock culture dictates. It’s simple logic through which I deduced that I was cheated. I didn’t grow up listening to Metallica. But maybe, just maybe after the concert, I would’ve grown old listening to their music. But their silence disappoints me. I feel like I was used for a cheap, promotional gimmick. The money returned, makes up for nothing.

As I lie in bed and watch NDTV newsanchors blame the “rowdy” Gurgaon crowd for “vandalising” the Metallica concert stage and creating “chaos”, I’m only filled with more anger.

I strongly feel that what you got tonight, is less when compared to what you actually deserved. The concert you organized in Gurgaon was a mess from the start to the finish. It started with the open consumption of alcohol, hash and what not at the entrance of the venue. With absence of any real security, it was a free-for-all. The seeds were sown the moment the crowd tried to push itself inside the venue and you made them wait for hours together. A woman could be seen weeping, lying on the floor with a bruised foot.

Once you actually opened the gates, you started frisking people for cigarttes and other banned items. The irony of this whole drama is the fact that while the staff frisking at the gates confiscated the cigarettes, Marlboro had stalls put up inside the concert venue selling overpriced cigarette boxes.

Now, when the 20000+ crowd stormed inside the venue, you suddenly realised the barricades were way too close to the stage. Either you failed to count the number of tickets sold or you really didn’t care about anyone’s security. So, now, you ask one half of the intoxicated to sit on the floor. The other half, is asked to move back. By this time, due to the wait outside the venue, the enthusiasm all combined with intoxicants, the crowds refuse to budge. There isn’t any security staff equipped to handle the situation. Whatever security staff is present, is busy talking to the ladies in the crowd and handing them soda cans and water bottles.

This is the time when a firang guy, I’m presuming a member of the Metallica crew, dressed in a grey t-shirt snatches the microphone and starts to speak – “You guys better fuckin’ listen to me! Move back you buttheads! Move back!”
Alright. This was unexpected. And as expected, the crowd is furious. Repeated attempts by the firang crew members now go in vain. The Indian organizers, now took the stage and addressed the crowd as “Bhai log, piche ho jao. Show nahin shuru karenge varna”. Another guy jumps in from behind and shouts, “Jai Bajrang Bali!”. The crowd claps, hoots and mocks the organizers. A serious situation turned into a joke.

Finally, after an hour, the crowd did show support and moved back. The organizers quickly got to “fixing” their barricades. All this while, the crowd just sits on the floor. I believe we were there to listen to heavy metal and not attend a satsang.

So, let me sum up the things till this point – the crew has insulted the Indian fans, probably because of some “third-world” bias which makes them feel that Indians don’t understand what metal is and you can treat them like shit and get away with it.

The wait continues. Again, I presume, this was allowed so that Fast Trax could sell shitty burgers for Rs. 80 and small cold drinks for Rs. 50. During this time, young Indian guys conveniently move guitars and drums away from the stage. The crowd still doesn’t know shit.

Another big concern is the fact that mobile networks simply ceased to operate. Once again, I’m assuming this was a targeted move to contain the negative PR (I know, I’m getting too much into conspiracies here).

Some people randomly walk on the stage, gesture towards the crowd and then walk off. It’s now around 6.30PM. I move out from the group of people next to the stage towards the far end of the venue. There are literally hundreds like me, lying on the floor, frustrated with the experience and still hoping for Metallica to come perform on stage. Suddenly, the guy in the grey t-shirt is back. “I have an important announcement to make. Metallica is at the hotel, holding a press conference with the national television channels. Due to technical difficulties, the concert will now be held tomorrow”. He quickly hands over the mic to an Indian guy while the crowd went hysterical. All that could be seen was a sea of middle fingers. The crowds start shouting. Someone throws a bottle on stage. The firangs run. The Indian guy threatens that “we’ve waited 30 years for Metallica to come to India, if you continue this behaviour, they will not perform tomorrow as well”. This final threat was the trigger. It set off the bomb which Metallica, the organizers and the crew themselves very carefully built due to their own lack of respect for the audience and shoddy management skills.

There are now literally dozens of bottles flying on the stage. Someone, even more frustrated, throws a 20 litre water dispenser, prompting many others to do the same. All this while, an organizer is still trying to pacify the crowd. Too little, too late. The barricades, which never really existed, are brought down and a dozen men are now on stage. The gathering on the stage swells and all hell breaks loose. Equipment is thrown around, speakers are tossed and the stage is torn apart. The security guys run away. The police, present in small numbers outside the venue do nothing. Its a mini riot. There are no emergency exits and its at that point my friends and I decide to leave before it got too ugly.

There are females, children, old fans, young fans, anyone and everyone. All of them disappointed.

You on the other hand, dear band members, were sitting in your hotel room, comfortably. You did not have the courtesy to apologise to your fans. Your crew treated the audience like dogs by hurling abuses at them and insulting them. After all of this, you expect the situation to go down well?

Had this been USA, UK or any other nation for that matter, you’d have not dare messed with the audience by way of insults. You would not have organized and participated in a concert that so blatantly compromised on security of everyone and possibly endangered so many lives. If there would’ve been a mistake, you would not have taken the audience for a ride, by making them wait for the entire day and very conveniently shooing them off in the end. You thought, well, this is India, a country filled with stupid, illiterate and downmarket people who really don’t get what were doing. So, let us just do our shit, because in the end, we’ll get away with it. You dissed the crowd, pissed them off with your arrogance and then sat on a time bomb waiting to explode.

The people waited for you for 30 years. You just never had the courtesy to show up. Fuck you.

At the end of the day, I lost 3 grands, lost an entire day to your nonsense and landed myself in a riot.
I’m not even a hardcore heavy metal or Metallica fan. Imagine the level of disappointment to those who are.
I wish someone sues all of you into oblivion.

Yours truly.

Excuse me for faulty grammar, if any. This rant has been written in one single shot without revision.

A follow-up that answers some points of discussion – The Reason Why I’m Angry with Metallica

A classmate, with her room on the lowest girls’ floor updated her Facebook status complaining about the same. What followed was mayhem – 1043 comments by a bunch of guys in a matter of a few hours.

Celebrations followed the riot with a loon of a senior coming out threatening to call the police. And did I mention that we are having our end terms? By far one of the craziest nights at the hostel. Will update this post with a screenshot.

It is heartbreaking to see your loved one break down in front of you and all you can do is offer them the comfort of words. I wish I were there to hug you both. I lie here in bed, unable to sleep. I am a very emotionless person. I don’t feel a thing when others might feel happy or sad. Today was an exception. Even though I couldn’t really feel the pain, sadness engulfs my mind and the tragedy has left me at a loss of words.

I don’t really know what’s going on inside of you but I hope you get all the strength from all possible sources.
I don’t really believe in God but may your faith & belief provide you with the necessary strength, peace and courage. Some things cannot be undone and you do not have control over them. You just need to gather the broken pieces and move on.

Remain optimistic. I pray the laughter tomorrow will wipe the pain of today. You are braver than you believe and stronger than you seem. Tomorrow will be full of happiness.

I saw myself sticking to some basic principles. I saw myself standing up for my friends. I saw myself taking due and undue criticism with a straight face. Most of all, I saw in me some ethics and I’m proud of that. For that, I cannot thank anyone but my family.

People told me I could not win without campaigning. I managed to clear the first hurdle without a whisper. Once I was in the contention, I played slow and steady, exposing the (mis)deeds and opening the eyes many to the dirty game play. I played fair. Without raising a fist and a word, I got those who plotted against me. I did get the help of many friends in creating the awareness.

This is for those who took cheap shots behind my back; this is for those who said I couldn’t win without being fair; for those who told me that I needed to compromise; for those who planned everything but were surprised in the end. I proved myself during the presentation and all I could hear were claps. I will step down next year, having proven myself, again.

I am not happy, I am not sad. I am just focussed on getting things right. But tonight, I will sleep satisfied.

But I was desperate. I wanted to try my hand at designing a T-shirt. I looked online for options and found a few. Some of them did not work, others did but then had some problems of their own. I finally settled on Myntra, which even though had a workable interface, would still throw up errors for me. I had two images, simple text, to be printed on the front and the back of the shirt respectively. I uploaded them via the customization tool on the website. The image on the front was supposed to be large while the one on the back was small.

The image files that I uploaded were large and of good quality. With everything in place, I placed the order on the 17th of January, 2011. I instantly got a confirmation mail stating the expected date of shipping and delivery. The order was delivered to my house 10 days later on 27th of January, which I find surprising. I went back home from the hostel on 5th February and rushed to open the package.

I opened the package and it was like someone punched me in the eye. A raggy looking T-shirt lay within the package. I tried it on and it wouldn’t fit. I’m a guy with fat bulging out at all the wrong places but XXL T-shirts never fail me. I put this against the existing XL sized T-shirts I owned and it fell woefully short in length as well as width.

To add to the insult, the print quality was pathetic. Don’t be fooled by the images on display at their website. If you want graphic T-shirts and you’re bored with Tantra, well, tough luck. Myntra isn’t the right place. The print quality is pathetic and the shirt quality is even more atrocious. I speak not from the experience with my T-shirt but by also looking at another T-shirt which a friend had ordered.

As I flipped over the T-shirt, there was another gift that Myntra had sent me. The text which was to be printed small was HUGE and staring at my face! So, the T-shirt is lying in the cupboard and I intend to wear it on Holi and then dispose it off.

I admit that I have not contacted their customer support simply because I’m so put off by the shit they shipped me in the first place. The feedback link they sent me through email doesn’t load. So Myntra, here is the feedback – SCREW YOU! In my opinion, you sell low quality, export rejects to your customers. I’d rather walk around naked than wear a Myntra T-shirt again.

Thankfully, they’re getting off now and I can try and concentrate on writing something better.

It’s been eight months in Delhi and I feel like I’ve been living here forever. I don’t particularly like the people here and they constantly remind me of the fake Chandigarh crowd I’ve had to endure for the most part of my life. The good thing about Delhi is, it’s big; very big. The sheer area and the volume of people it contains is a great leveller. No one cares for anyone. No one’s bothered about who you are. It’s this kind of feeling that is satisfying for a person like me.

I’ve spent my entire life trying to tolerate nobodies who had nothing but adventures and the status of their dads and uncles to boast of. It was agonsing and suffocating to sit and converse with people who had nothing to talk of but power, money and muscle.

I had realised quite sometime back that I didn’t want to stay in Chandigarh. I didn’t want to sit each day with people who I despised. But it was only when I spent a month in Delhi that I was sure of the fact that Chandigarh was just not for me. Never do I intend to go back to that rotten place. I agree it’s beautiful. I agree it has a charm of it’s own. But it has no character. Living in Chandigarh is like sitting inside a bubble, oblivious to the outside world. If I ever find a way to profit off something meant for the ‘phukras’, I’d gladly move back to Chandigarh. I could make a killing in no time. But if there’s anything meaningful that I do in life, I’m pretty certain it won’t be in Chandigarh.

Maybe I’m right, maybe I’m wrong. I’m just putting down thoughts coming to me. This post might not make sense but it’s nothing but a trigger. The rain of bullets will follow.

Getting ‘gangraped’, with a dozen guys stripping me, throwing all sorts of concoctions on my body mixed with cold water in this December chill, was never my idea of a birthday celebration. But then, there’s nothing like an experience that lasts a lifetime.

Happy birthday to me!

Thank you to all those who’ve been a part of my life. Thank you to all those who were a part of my life. Waiting for all those, who will be.

The pin stuck inside my eye still hurts. Always will. Peace.

In these ten days, I’ve done things I never imagined I would – cleaned toilets, did my laundry etc. From the time I set foot in this hostel, I’ve only made friends. It’s a different experience altogether, living on your own with people from different parts of the country. Although, a campus hostel would’ve been appreciated but this is as close as one gets to hostel life away from the college campus.

My own room, with my own loo and my own space. I do have to share it with another guy but I think it’s largely OK. Getting up at 7 in the morning, going for my breakfast and then walking in this heat to the college are just some of the things I’m doing, which I never really had done. Landran was more like a four year vacation. I could skip college at will, give exams when I wanted to and ignore the faculty when I desired. Over here it’s quite the opposite. The environment is professional and I usually find myself sitting in the library after classes, something I was certain would never happen in this lifetime.

I think I made the right choice. MBA for me isn’t just another course. It isn’t a means of getting a good placement. I’m doing this because I want to work. For once in my life, I want to slog and prove to myself that I can do wonders. I don’t want to feel all raw.

The Term-1 officially commenced today, on 30th June. An action packed day filled with case studies, assignments, projects and the like. The mid terms are somewhere in the first week of August. I’m really not scared at the moment. Just beginning to feel excited about all the learning that will take place. I don’t know how well I’ll do but I intend on giving it my 100% this time. Since I’m free from any sort of commitments or distractions, it makes the task easier.

Girls don’t really excite me. Delhi doesn’t excite me. It’s my course that does. I don’t care if I’ll get a job after this because I know that in the end I’ll come out as a better person.

Goodnight.

तेरी ख़ुशबू में बसे ख़त मै जलाता कैसे…
प्यार में ड़ूबे हुए ख़त मै जलाता कैसे…
तेरे हाथों के लिखे ख़त मै जलाता कैसे…

पर तेरे ख़त आज मैने जला दिए… आग लगा दिए…

There will be certain things that your family expects you to do and you fail them; things that your friends want you to do. Even girlfriends have numerous expectations. Why? Why can we humans not live without expecting things in return? People constantly tell me that I’m not exploiting my potential and that they expect that I’ll work hard and do something extraordinary. But the fact is that I really don’t want to. There is no particular mountain that I want to climb up to. I have not set lofty goals for myself and I don’t want to be rich or famous. All I want to do is live a simple life. I’ll live it alone if I have to.

I don’t want to graduate as a hot-shot MBA and mint money. What purpose will I achieve by doing that? Neither do I want to sit in front of a PC screen my entire life. All I know is that I don’t want to be like you all. I have the brain and the caliber. The way I want to use it is entirely upto me. I won’t mind if it goes waste as long as I am happy and content.

I don’t expect anything from anyone. I don’t expect anything from life. Kindly stop nagging and sulking. It’s only ruining the happiness. Maybe… it already has. I know I’m not good enough… never said I was.