Again it was snowing when I landed in Paris.

It had been thirty years almost to the day since I’d last visited the city, so I was looking forward to reminiscing on my journey from Orly to the Holiday Inn at Marne La Vallee.

I have a good Scot’s tongue in my head so I quickly got myself prepared for the next part of the journey by asking the way, making use of what little French I remembered.

Quite proud of myself for changing directions at two train stops, I was undaunted when I arrived in deep snow at Disneyland Paris, to discover that I should’ve  disembarked about three stops earlier at Noisy Le Grande. Thankfully the taxi driver accepted the hire and drove me back; many had decided to do only short journeys because the weather and road conditions were so bad, so I was lucky!

My late arrival around 9pm meant I was probably going to miss dinner so I settled into my room, spending the rest of the evening preparing for the next day’s workshops.

I enjoyed breakfasting with others from IHG that I’d met on previous trips but I was eager to start my day’s work – this was something I’d never done before; attempting to deliver motivational training, partially at least, in another language.

Thankfully I had IHG’s Anne-Marie Aucouturier to help with translation; Anne-Marie had participated in the ‘Will to Win’ workshop in Den Haag so was familiar with the outline of the session and had grasped the concept easily.

I introduced myself and the content of the session to the Parisian sales, marketing and hotel general managers, in the best French I could muster – engaging my participants in their first challenge; understanding my Scottish accent.

I spoke slowly and used French in my PowerPoint presentation to further reduce or eliminate any language barriers there may be. Wherever there seemed to be a lack of comprehension, Anne-Marie stepped up to fill the gap – ensuring everyone was in the flow.

Each session that day, as is always the case, brought slightly different challenges but none were so huge, they were insurmountable. Everyone participated fully; enjoying the relaxation aspects to it which were integral to building trust and communication within the groups.

At the end of the day I was ecstatically exhausted!

As I was thanked by those taking part I realised how the day had impacted upon them;  smiling, they were visibly opening up to their colleagues and communicating more animatedly than before. As we stepped into the foyer some were already congregated for the evening trip to Disneyland, chatting and sharing experiences. I was high-fived on more than one occasion walking through the crowd!

I decided not to rush to meet the deadline for the bus leaving this time – instead I would relax in my room for a while, shower and dress for dinner – before re-joining the others for a nightcap in the cocktail lounge.

Of course I wanted to know what everyone thought about the sessions, so I could hardly keep myself away from the returned evaluation forms – after kicking off my shoes and pouring a tea, I sat down to read them.

I was delighted with the responses; ‘improved confidence’, ‘increased trust in colleagues’ and ‘confidence in the team’ were among them. Nothing remotely resembling negative had been reported back.

You can also imagine my surprise at finding at least three of the same replies to one question; what did you most enjoy?

The answer; l’ambience.

My trepidation had been unfounded and the job was done.  I could relax more  – and allow myself to feel a great sense of achievement, something I rarely feel strongly. I remember laughing as I thought, ‘if I can achieve l’ambience in Paris, I can do anything!’

It had been confirmed; we’d just had a very successful first day of IHG’s Winning in 2013 Conference in Paris and everyone was feeling much more confident, including myself.

In under five weeks I’d been to three cities, training management and staff from nine different European countries; it was fun and exhausting …but exhilarating at the same time.

I better understand the working mindset of people in the hotel trade, how important it is to trust others and to communicate effectively; now I have an even greater respect for the energy that is required to do those jobs.

Thank you to IHG, Holiday Inn, Crowne Plaza and InterContinental hotels for providing me with such insight and for the wonderful hospitality I received in each city.

Incoming search terms:

• motivational communivation for a winning team

It was lightly snowing when I arrived in Den Haag, a day earlier than I should have, due to the lack of suitable flights ensuring I’d arrive on time.

When I stepped out of my taxi at the hotel the first thing I noticed was the warmth of the flourescent pink light, glowing through the long windows of the cocktail bar … and a couple of guys with a camera. I thought perhaps a wedding was taking place.

IHG had again pre-booked my room so when I went to reception to check in, I was surprised to be approached by one of the gentleman I’d seen outside, who then asked if I’d ‘pose for the camera as man and wife’ with him.

Laughingly, I immediately asked the receptionists what was going on but they couldn’t explain. It wasn’t until after the camera had finished rolling that the General Manager of Den Haag’s Crowne Plaza hotel told me it was a Crowne Plaza promotional video across the five Benelux and Nordics countries – Holland, Belgium, Denmark, Sweden and Finland – the countries represented at the next day’s Winning in 2013 Conference. .

I went on to crack jokes about suddenly appearing in Dutch videos and was rewarded with complimentary drinks from the cocktail bar – and a few mischievous comments in the following days.  I’m sure to receive a link to the video when it’s completed.

The next day while awaiting the arrival of the organising IHG team, I made full use of the indoor facilities to relax and reduce my own stress from traveling and the quick turnaround from Vienna; swimming, sauna, steam room and I even ventured outside to the Finnish sauna – which will remain firmly in my memory as the hottest sauna I’ve ever been in. It was a welcome breather to step back out to the minus-whatever temperatures, just to stop myself from frying!

On entering a full lift when exiting the leisure facilities, it came natural to me to say ‘Thank God I put my clothes back on’, raising a few laughs from the surprised faces beside me, but in truth the Finnish sauna hadn’t quite worn off – even after a cold shower and I did wonder if I could sneak back to my room unnoticed…

Arrangements and organising done for the conference, we were free to check out the suites we’d be using the next day. Imagine my surprise when the hotel staff took great joy in showing me their favourite conference room, which I’d be using the next day;  softly lit with giant pink and black bean bags for participants, instead of the usual, run-of-the-mill hotel chairs.

It soon became apparent the following day that this was the delegates’ favourite training room too! It took little encouragement for them to loosen restrictive clothing and kick off shoes; they were ready for this!

Each group (made up of General Managers, sales and marketing management and staff and some visiting IHG Head Office staff) welcomed the chance to relax and enjoy the atmosphere, immediately opening up to the concept of being stronger when we’re relaxed than when we’re tense. It made my job a whole lot  easier too!

Team building with groups of people who are open to trying new things is hugely enjoyable and effective for all concerned – especially when they’re presented with exercises in coordination and stuff that shifts perception.

Before entering the room no-one knew what was ahead of them but they soon got into things in the true hotelier spirit.

I came to understand and appreciate the huge amount of energy everyone in the trade I came across, has for their work. Most are in direct contact with customers and clients all of their working day; finding solutions and fixing problems, smiling all the while – even when under huge pressure to seal a deal.

Building trust with colleagues and clients is integral to the job so   communication and conflict resolution strategies are important. By eradicating some of the fear we hold in these situations we can trust more and communicate better.

The Personal Power training events which were designed specifically for the hotel trade have proven to do the job exceptionally well;  they’ve provided [well-received] coping skills, stress management and empowering techniques which can be applied to any area of life, as well as a welcome break to the usual but critical, in-house training IHG provided at the conference.

To round off our stay in Den Haag IHG arranged a trip to Madurodam,  followed by a champagne receptioned awards ceremony, for high performing hotels in the region.

I spent much of the evening in conversation with a General Manager from Finland who had a great interest in the type of team building workshops I’d just presented.

His one admission was that he had initially failed to see how I could work across different sectors; how could working with corporates possibly be the same as working with criminals?

It took him a little while and a chat with me to convince him of what he already knew; we ALL experience fear and we all need to face those fears. We each have to create opportunities to grow, to have choice and to change what no longer serves us.

Den Haag mission accomplished. Now to tackle Paris; my biggest challenge to date.

January kicked off with ‘Winning in 2013′ – a conference for the DACH regions of IHG (International Hotel Group) in mid January, in Vienna.

After a few holiday season hiccups, I got into the swing of things pretty quickly, enjoying the winter travel and the excellent company of Austrian, German and Swiss hoteliers representing a number of hotel groups such as Holiday Inn, Crowne Plaza and Intercontinental, amongst others.

The Holiday Inn Vienna South was an excellent venue, with superb management and staff ensuring our stay was top quality, often going above and beyond the call of duty to meet our needs.

Around 120 delegates attended the event, almost all of whom participated in the Personal Power workshops lined up for the afternoon of day one.

It was fast and furious; energy being high on the first meant we flew through physical exercises and a few questions designed to spark off a little introspection. Laughter was the dominant sound throughout a fun session, culminating with each and every person breaking through personal issues and their board, with the support and encouragement from everyone in the room.

The second workshop was slightly different as I shifted gear and made slight adjustments to the programme to fit better with timing and again, everyone left the room with smiley faces, eyes glistening with new-found power and chatting excitedly to new-found colleagues.

The energy in the room was remarked upon throughout the day and more than once I was asked where mine comes from. It’s difficult to say in this post but when you work through your personal obstacles (things which hold you back, right down to beliefs) you clear the energy pathways – opening them up and allowing access to more and more energy.

On the final session of the first day people were becoming tired; they’d been thinking hard all day and it was showing; so I quickly adapted the programme again to suit the mood. Before long the room and its occupants were fully energised and when the time came, they almost came charging at their boards with gusto!

I had only 10 minutes to prepare to leave the hotel for an IHG arranged bus tour around scenic Vienna city and a traditional Austrian dinner; but I managed it and was very glad I did too…

Vienna in winter is beautiful; the architecture is quite stunning, with buildings in pristine condition, and tradition has been maintained. I was assured that it is also very pretty during other seasons.

It had been snowing all day and the bus and walking tour, apart from being hilariously funny was also an education; my ‘tour guides’ for the evening were German and both had mischievous energy. More laughter was served as the evening progressed.

Dinner was superb and I un-ashamedly told my pflaumenmus story; of how my German friend and assistant had made it at home and presented me with a jar. I kinda knew it was made from plums but had been reminded that I might find it bitter so when wondering what to do with this ‘chutney’ I baked myself a lovely big potato, added salad, with a side of pflaumenmus.

Barbara laughed uncontrollably when I told her a few days later how I’d eaten it. No wonder; it’s a dessert! Served that night with a scrumptious selection of other Austrian delights.

Another late night was spent chatting about accessing personal power with delegates who were interested in finding out more, especially about becoming more relaxed and more able to communicate with colleagues.

The next day approximately 30 – 50cm of snow was forecast; already a few airports had cancelled flights or had closed altogether, due to severe weather conditions. I luckily had no delays or re-directions, so made it back to the UK in good time.

I returned home elated and exhausted with a bottle of Austria’s winter warmer; Stroh Rum, to be used on special occasions only, as it’s 60% proof!

As always, I screened the evaluation forms to see what the feedback was and if I needed to change anything; every one had been completed with extremely positive responses and comments.

It was obvious even if it hadn’t been written, that over the course of the first day in Vienna, communication and trust had been made stronger within hotel teams, across hotel groups  and in the IHG group itself.

It seems everyone there found plenty to take away with them to think about and act upon.

A good time was had by all. Next stop Den Haag.

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Moving on; I’m not going to say it was easy, sometimes it was extremely difficult – two children relied upon me and I was responsible for their safety and well-being.

Starting over after an abusive relationship is one of the most difficult tasks I’ve undertaken to date – and that includes walking 20 feet of burning coals!

Full of determination and a will to succeed, I set about finding new skills and focused on what my limited and valuable time could be spent on, outwith my parental responsibilities. I took up psychology when I went to sign up for a computing course (I’ve never done one yet!) and continued with my own development, mindfully experiencing as much as I could every day.

I went back to college and did what I’d been forbidden to do while in the relationship because it was ‘too intimate’. I studied Holistic Therapies – massage, aromatherapy, reflexology and added my own eastern learnings.

In the early days I was soon met with the major obstacles every single parent faces; childcare, expenses/ cash flow problems, finding time to study and being there for the kids – but I battled on. Hard as it was, I enjoyed many aspects of it; my freedom to learn, to find myself and to be me, achieving in my own right.

As a woman I faced different things; dealing with male lawyers, male doctors (even the gynecologist was male!), male bank managers and male everything else! I really began to see and feel what discrimination was as I was dismissed on a number of occasions.

I became even more determined to put a stop to this kind of treatment towards women.

I realised I first had to change things about myself before I set about changing the world; I had every intention of doing so – and still have.

I was already ‘empowered’ by what I was achieving, I was becoming more confident as a person; I had great coping skills – now I had to balance my Aries energy with knowledge and practice.

I firmly believe we affect everything we interact with so it’s important to me, that I tread gently; leaving as little an imprint as possible, BUT we must pass on our knowledge – open the doors of communication and put a stop to every violence against women – including that which has been perpetuated by the state.

By not fully committing to equal pay and equal rights for women the UK government has helped to instil some kind of warped illusion that we are of lower standing; yet they fear the power of ONE voice – the voice of women who say ‘Enough! No more will we accept second class citizenry, nor abusive behaviour at any level.’

The ‘system’ is still in the dark ages because it has chosen to be.

Raising awareness of the obstacles women face is a task we should be undertaking with a passion; the welfare of women means much more than simply her security – we are reaching into the next generation by affecting what happens now; reducing poverty and increasing standards of living for those who should not be affected by domestic, or any other abuse – children.

We have the ability to improve lives immediately; it just takes a shift in focus and the desire to do it.

There is no need for austerity as we’re seeing it at this moment in time; there’s enough wealth to feed the world many times over – it’s just being circulated in the way it always has been – to protect the rich and privileged by causing fear and famine in faraway lands – always turning the wheels of the war machine.

That system has taught us to recognise and fear difference; to work in competition and to alienate us from each other. Many never even bother to question the reasons behind it, blindly following the ‘patriotic’ or chauvinistic views held by generations before.

We can change that by ourselves but we need the WILL to do it.

We must unite by identifying where the problems actually lie, stick together and work for a better future for our kids and grandchildren. Women are changing the world, this time in the fourth or fifth wave of Feminism; we’re all in it together; uniting with a common cause the length and breadth – and in every corner of the world.

But here’s another thought; instead of One Billion Rising, let’s make it 7 Billion Rising – ensure every man, woman and child knows that oppressing or abusing women (and indeed any other being) is unacceptable. Violence against women will only end when we shine a light upon it, exposing it and appeal to the feminine in all of us; the nurturing, healing, caring and compassionate, that which exists within us as human beings.

Each of us has been disenchanted by the system at some point; each of us believes there’s something unfair going on. Each of us (mostly) want the best for ourselves and our neighbourhood and will willingly help another if they can – supporting, encouraging and empowering others. That’s where the fun and feelings of contentment lie.

That means that we ALL – male, female and trans-gendered, need to be in touch with the nurturer within; the one who nourishes and encourages, who loves and cares to the fullest extent.

It’s not about whether you fit one or other category, it’s about how we treat each other.

This also means that we discourage violence, discrimination and inequality. We stand together as one; united in our passion to create a better world.

Help yourself and in turn, you will help others move on.

8 Steps in The Art of Moving On

1.  Make the decision and everything else will follow. Trust the process.
2.  Strengthen your support; hang out with people who understand your situation, learn to let go and believe you have worth.
3. Seek help; Women’s Aid, friends and family for support. Learn how and which practical tips will keep you safe.
4. Break the Silence – every abuser FEARS exposure and public humiliation.
5. Build yourself up – use every day to learn something new, apply yourself fully to priority tasks, add to your skills-base; learn how to cope, rest… and breathe confidence into your life.
6. Cut the ties that bind; break the chains that initially bound you to this toxic partnership or you’ll quite possibly return to it, or find another abusive relationship to fulfil your self-destruct strategy.
7. Intend the outcome you desire – focus on achieving the life you want and deserve to have and move towards that dream.
8. Don’t look back until the mist has cleared. Give yourself proper breathing space; take time to heal and re-evaluate your position. Make changes from your own vantage point; this is your life, live it as you would want to look back on it.

Remember, if one can do it, we ALL can do it – face the fear and do it anyway! You have all your brothers and sisters behind and beside you.

One day you’ll thank yourself for re-claiming your personal power, and for gifting your mind (and your children) freedom.

Nb. I bear no enmity; I worked through my own issues and thank those who have promoted my growth, allowing me to move on.

I walk with grace and with dignity.

Thank You – Jamelia

Psst… A FREE download will be available soon and I KNOW you’ll want one – stay tuned!!

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• domestic violence and moving on

Why Domestic Violence Victims Don’t Leave.

Leslie Morgan – TED / TALKS TEDX

Why would anyone stay with a man who beats her?

Having been in a similar scenario, I can identify with many of the points that Leslie raises and the scars it leaves behind. I’m writing this as a woman but I fully accept that domestic violence happens to both men and women.

It’s something that wasn’t talked about, it was silenced and perpetuated. The stats are astounding but a new awareness is coming. Now we have One Billion Rising… and counting!

Sometimes beatings don’t happen; the threat of them may, along with the threat of losing children, family and/or lifestyle, but they swear they’d never raise a hand to you.

Your life might be a misery without getting a thrashing; you may be in a situation where confusion reigns – and nothing is ever right. Maybe you always have to justify your whereabouts, what you’ve spent and who you’ve been with. Perhaps close friends and family members are seen to be a ‘threat’ to your relationship but your often reminded that this partner is ‘all you really need’. And of course in the beginning, that’s all you really want.

Eventually the recipient will be ground down; living a life in fear of consequence, depleted of confidence and hope. If the abuser has done a good job, you’ll have lost best friends, the trust of parents and siblings – and will look like the complete fool you’ve been cast as.

There are specialist services which deal with emotional abuse or family mediation where a breakdown in a relationship has occurred. For some this may work perfectly well, for others the only option is out.

And this is probably the most dangerous time.

When faced with the truth of their actions, people who use their power to manipulate or control others, fear (possibly) a multitude of things, but mostly I believe they fear being shamed; outed as a failure and being left alone – with themselves – the one person, they really don’t like.

Their fuel is their ego – keeping up appearances, never wanting to lose face is of utmost importance, so they’ll do anything to stop this from happening. Anything.

After they’ve sown the seeds of your insecurities, inadequacies and failings but realise you no longer accept it, they’ll change tact.

Strumming my pain…

They’ll plead with you to stay, beg for your forgiveness and promise to sort their tension/ anger/ anxiety problems out. This is likely the only time you’ll hear them acknowledge a failing. They’ll sound utterly despondent, pitifully remorseful and full of optimism for your future together – further confusing the recipient of the abusive behaviour; raising questions like; do they mean it this time? Have I got it all wrong, perhaps the problem actually is me?

This kind of reflection is great when you’re at a distance from the source of it –  but attempting to see things clearly at this point is going to be a waste of time. Base your decisions in the clear, cold light of day; preferably away from danger and if possible, talked through with people you can trust.

Think only of your safety and well-being – and that of your children, if you have them.

Seek professional help if you possibly can – that could be via your GP or through a service like a local Woman’s (Men’s) Aid. You may be advised to consult with a lawyer; if this is the case, you can ask if there’s one connected with Woman’s Aid or other service that will help to protect your rights.

Know the warning signs;

*Charming and attentive

*Plausible and convincing

*Creating illusions; deferring power -

*Adoring and adorable

*’Poor me’

*Isolation

*Creating ‘need’ – using your weaknesses against you.

*Financial dependency

*Creating fearful situations

* Encouraging disloyalty/ betrayal at every level in the family structure (parents and children included)

*Creating the need to justify movements/ actions

*Thriving on creating confusion

*Duping you into believing you have a psychological problem

*Threatening violence

*Repentance

*Actual violence

*Profuse repentance

*Using the system; courts, lawyers against you to promote the illusion of power

*Financial ruination

*Terrorising – children and mother and using extortive methods to frighten others.

*Threat of death – sometimes.

*Death

Get out! And get your children out!

I was lucky; I built a support structure around me who never failed to be compassionate and understanding.  I learned new skills to cope and I improved my life-chances by investing in me.

I have terrific friends, eventually re-built my family around me and have a good relationship with my children.

I cut all ties energetically as well as physically to everything connected to this person and to the people who stood by and watched what was happening to a once happy-go-lucky person who loved life; shrunken, agitated, fearful, crying in despair and contemplating suicide as it seemed the only way out, almost getting to the stage that I believed my children would be better off without me.

It was short-lived when I realised that the person causing all of this distress would NEVER explain to my kids that it wasn’t their fault if I topped myself. I questioned what kind of life was ahead of them… and I came to this conclusion;

I couldn’t risk them being exposed to and adopting this type of behaviour purely because it was dominant in the relationship.

I had to be strong. I had to do what was right; I left for my own sake and that of the kids. Then I had to suffer the ongoing traumas of being ‘punished’ for leaving.

The worm finally turned when confronted with a devious and angry man on the doorstep threatening to take my life; having firmly deposited the kids out of earshot and later leaking a story that I was completely bonkers and out of control.

I had offers from people who wanted to come stay overnight to support me but I wouldn’t hear of it; this would be the first – and last, night that I’d face this fear. The decision was made; if he returned, he was being arrested without me even opening the door.

NO-ONE had the right to threaten my life.

I was filled with rage; rage like I’d never felt before. How dare he!

I knew, in that moment, that I would not tolerate any further abuse from this insecure narcissist. I drew on the anger and decided on the spot this would never, ever happen again.

My whole body went on alert – I was experiencing something I later came to term as ‘changing your chi’, which is better explained in my book “Spiritual First Aid – Finding Balance, but is skirted around here.

I used my indignation and anger to find solutions to my problem; not once dwelling on the ‘victim’ state.

First thing next day I had practical tips on personal safety and a counsellor arranged for the kids, via Women’s Aid – the ball was rolling – and I would not look back with anything but disdain for the man I once loved.

He had long lost my respect – all that had remained were energetic ties through the children; there was nothing else left.

I had taken my power back; I had learned the Art of Moving On.

Nb. If your life, or your children’s lives are in danger contact the police, your local Women’s Aid or someone you trust 100%. Immediately.

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The other night as I was drifting off towards sleep, I found myself laughing (audibly) at one of Aliya’s comments on a thread of conversation which somehow turned into a mini swear-fest. This in turn, allowed me to think of an incident she’d quoted on a similar (maybe the same) thread on Facebook – reminding me how much I’ve changed and how many amazingly wonderful folks I have in my life – because I made those changes.

Social media platforms have the ability to enrich our lives when we thoughtfully engage with others, just as in everyday life but sometimes we’re too busy, too stressed, too crazy trying to ‘do’ – having little fun or time to ourselves…  then we open our browsers and there’s a party online!

Everyone’s chatting or debating, lolling and laughing; hearts attach themselves to passing thoughts, art capturing the essence and sometimes music takes on new meaning. All are utilising choice; choosing who to talk to, when to be available and what to talk about.

Some of you are dancers, artists, sweat(er)s, hippies and healers, visionaries, social media front-runners, writers, pioneers, crusties and crackpots, (h)activists and much more besides…

We’ve worked hard to find each other and to find our ‘self’.

What care we the colour of our skin, our sexual preference, our faith or belief? We have respect and take our responsibility seriously, doing whatever is within our means to make this place we call Home, a better, more equal, a more just place in which to live. Everyone I see or interact with online, will gladly come to the assistance of another; offering whatever help is needed.

We’ve formed our own community; choosing dialogue (mostly) where values differ, to bridge the gap. We have our own support structures – by choice, we have people who can offer skills on every subject and if they haven’t got what we’re looking for – they know someone who has.

Our interactions reflect our focus and determination to continue to do what’s ‘right’ to help our neighbour who is less privileged – even when that means shocking the pants off them occasionally, to make them sit up and take note.

We are accountable for our actions and recognise our power as individuals in a chosen collective. We choose to use that power in a positive way.

I believe we are all inherently ‘good’ people – open and willing to open up – to possibilities, to change, to be free, to be flexible. To be…  ourselves; the inherently compassionate, peaceful and loving people we are.

In some way, perhaps this is the kinda microcosm of our utopia – where that basic respect and responsibility towards ourselves and others, is paramount.

I see you. I hear you. I stand with you.

Thank you for allowing me to journey with you.

Robert Burns, Scotland’s best known poet is celebrated by Scots the world over, on this day every year.

Rabbie, as he’s commonly known here in Scotland, was born on January 25th 1759 in a small thatched cottage, in the small (and very beautiful) town of Alloway, in Ayr. He lived only until 1796, but left his mark quite profoundly in our country and around the globe.

Up and down the country Burns Suppers are held, celebrating the bard’s birthday – and a very special occasion it is too, as the haggis is piped in and addressed before guests are allowed to tuck into the traditional dish of haggis, neeps and tatties.

Today (how timeous!) the Scotsman revealed that Scotland’s Don Juan had a secret (until now) friendship, ‘perhaps platonic, between the Ploughman poet and Elizabeth Kemble, whose family were regarded as the greatest acting dynasty of the 18th century. They owned theatres in Aberdeen in Edinburgh.’

(Thanks to ‘YES to an Independent Scotland for the meme)

Although not an Ayrshire lass by birth, I’ve spent the past fifteen years perfecting my Ayrshire twang; it’s quite a combination when mixed with ‘Weegie slang’!

Anyway enough about me – oops sorry, more about me;

Bonnie Lesley

O saw ye bonnie Lesley
As she gaed o’er the Border?
She’s gane, like Alexander,
To spread her conquests farther.

To see her is to love her,
And love but her for ever;
For Nature made her what she is,
And ne’er made sic anither!

Thou art a queen, fair Lesley,
Thy subjects we, before thee;
Thou art divine, fair Lesley,
The hearts o’ men adore thee.

The Deil he could’na scaith thee,
Or aught that wad belang thee;
He’d look into thy bonnie face,
And say “I canna wrang thee!”

The Powers aboon will tent thee;
Misfortune sha’na steer thee;
Thou’rt like themsel’ sae lovely
That ill they’ll ne’er let near thee.

Return again, fair Lesley,
Return to Caledonie!
That we may brag we hae a lass
There’s nane again sae bonnie!

For those who need translation;

I saw you Bonnie Lesley
Has she gone over the border?
She’s gone, like Alexander,
To spread her conquests farther.

To see her is to love her,
And love but her for ever;
For Nature made her what she is,
And never made such another!

Thou art a queen, fair Lesley,
Thy subjects we, before thee;
Thou art divine, fair Lesley,
The hearts of men adore thee.

The Devil he could’nt scaithe thee,
Or anything which belonged to thee;
He’d look into thy pretty face,
And say “I cannot wrong thee!”

The Powers around will shelter thee;
Misfortune shouldn’t steer thee;
Thou’rt like themselves so lovely
That ill they’ll never let near thee.

Return again, fair Lesley,
Return to Caledonie!
That we may brag we have a lass
There’s none again so bonnie!

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Aye, it’s been a funny old year; every month bringing something new and exciting – but a quicker one to pass, I’ve never known.

The beginning of the year  saw me slip into the community side of things – Chairing the Community Council and working with the women of my own town; applying all that I’ve learned over [mostly] the last fourteen years and reminding me of serving my time on national community development boards.

It was a stark reminder that very little has changed in that period.

Amonsgt work and other responsibilities, I enjoyed writing blog posts and eventually completed Spiritual First Aid – Finding Balance. 

I had finally got to grips with the workings (and trappings) of Social Media; but  still loved what I was learning – and began making it work for me, instead of the other way around. Much thanks goes to Mark Corner for all his help, especially for aiding me in achieving front page Google rankings.

In early spring I Chaired two sets of local Hustings then bowed out of  the scene, realising that just like parliamentary politics, one is kept tied into a system of untying very small knots, to keep one occupied and distracted from the real issues.

I had my ‘Today’s Luminary‘ spot, where I had to make every word count to get some of my personal development points across… followed sharply by a completely new experience – opening my inner and outer world in another way to the spirit plant, ayahuasca; a very great teacher.

By mid spring I’d done a few extras parts in River City, a local production, so when I was offered the leading part of Emmanuela in ‘Shock Doctrine’, I took it in my stride; although we did make a few small changes to the character to make her [me] a little more authentic. Let’s just say it sure was quite a shock – especially for the cast who had no idea that I would present myself on the day of our festival performance, in full bondage gear!

This was to become the highlight of my summer – although there wasn’t one in Scotland – Doune the Rabbithole Festival, like many others, became water-logged but the people stayed happy.

The autumn flew by with a Goddess Firewalk marking the season; a fully satisfying day of self-growth for all concerned as we shared skills and stories, experience and knowledge.

I”ve sweated, tried Tantra and taught Reiki, along with other transformational stuff, pushing myself and putting others through their paces to the extremes in some cases;

I was picked for a Hollywood movie by the Director (only as an extra – but what a nice lift!) and play a drunk in Hogmanay’s ‘Only An Excuse’ – which I’m sure will be hilarious and on YouTube, soon after being shown on TV.

I’ve developed and delivered ‘An Introduction to Social Media’ training to community groups, so that they might spread the word about their chosen cause, learn in a simplified manner how to apply ‘engagement’ and build trust with sponsors, funders and/or sympathisers.

As always, I’ve challenged the state – and the status quo; rebel clowning at Faslane Nuclear Base and later in the year Glasgow, raising awareness of the situation in Gaza.

Somehow I got roped into doing a naked photo-shoot, something I’d planned for clients (happening in March, if you’re interested) but had no desire to participate in. Anyway, I’ve ended up starkers on the pitch, much to the despair of my children!

It hasn’t always been a bundle of laughs; it’s been hard going at times with plenty to contend with, but I reckon I’ve developed enough coping skills to get by, without catastrophic effects on my well-being.

I’ve met some wonderful people both online and off this year too – many of whom have forged a place in my heart and in my life.

And I’ve burnt some bridges too; those who haven’t made it to the end of the year with me are gone for a reason – we’ve served our purpose and that’s ok; it’s time to move on.

So as we approach the end of 2012, the last hours of reflection have provided me with more learning, more positive experiences and more to look forward to in the coming year; who knows what’s ahead?

My Letter to the Past and to the Future from last year still stands – I aim to release more negativity and increase my positive outlook by aspiring to becoming more of me.

In short, I’ve learned that as I open up my mind to new possibilities, my world opens doorways into them – and that sometimes you have to push your future forward…

So it’s time to release the old with loving energy, making space for the entrance of new and peaceful transitions to come.

• Take a risk; try new things.
• Push yourself out of your comfort zones.
• Name the game; expose control & manipulation
• Relax your mind – things aren’t always as bad as they seem.
• Do something to improve the health of your body, mind and spirit.
• Listen to others but decide for yourself that which is good/healthy for you.

Make 2013 your year!

Incoming search terms:

• world bridgers ayahuasca

We live in interesting times, for sure.

The whole world is changing; nothing is as it was even forty years ago…

Rainforests are lost to us; gone are flora and fauna that may have saved lives. Animal species have become extinct, even more are under threat. We have sophisticated weaponry; ‘surgical’ striking M51 nuclear missiles, ‘invisible’ cloaking and robot dogs  for use against each other, without conscience – technology has taken a giant leap and yet children the world over are dying of hunger and live in dire poverty.

We’ve cut down our trees and allowed corporations to pollute our water; our two main life support systems, ruined by capitalism and materialism. We’ve claimed them as our own to mis-use and abuse – but at what cost?

Throughout time there have been protagonists and antagonists; learned and respected people – elected at times, to represent the best interests of their peers. Sometimes, un-elected free-thinkers guided others by encouraging questioning the status quo.

This has possibly become more evident now with the incredible availability of information available via the internet and social media platforms making it much more accessible; actively encouraging communication and debate on topics which would once have been ‘difficult’ to discuss.

Those leading the opposition are often called the ‘left’ (strangely asserting some kind of assumption about the authenticity of  ‘right’). These are the activists who have vision and see not only the present destruction, but also long-term effects.

These are the people who ‘do’ – they know they can’t wait for policy change or awareness to rise – they have to make that happen; they are compelled ‘do’ the job themselves, change policy by raising awareness in the masses… but it doesn’t come easy.

This is where Schopenhauer’s Three Stages of Truth become most apparent; first ridicule, then violent opposition and finally acceptance.

As more and more people realise what’s happening, of how their Rights are being diminished, of how they feel about their own power in world situations – or whether that’s about saving dolphins from slaughter in Taiji Bay or recognising the lies of the Blair government (predecessors and successors included now) – as they’ve illegally and immorally invaded countries like Iraq and Afghanistan.

It’s taken time, but the truth is out there, it has emerged and it will keep on rearing its head until every last person realises how damaging and cancerous we – the people – have become, by being complicit in their crimes against humanity.

Activists get a hard time from people who neither understand nor wish to acknowledge what’s going on, right under their noses. It suits the rest to dismiss an activist’s claim because primarily or indirectly, that person will be benefitting from the corporation or the system which supports it.

In ten or twelve years I’ve observed all of this happening; it’s happened to me personally and a number of my friends, yet time and again, our insights have been proven to be correct.

Meanwhile…

Plenty other stuff is also going on;  people who may not describe themselves as activists are creating change in a different way – they are the whistleblowers outing malpractice, naming and shaming the games of power and corruption. Some are investigative journalists while others are community members, asking their Councillors or MP’s questions.

They are the agitators. They agitate the impurities in our society like they’re washing out stained clothing.

These are people who sometimes have clout and have gone into and carry out their jobs with the utmost dedication, to improving the well-being of others. They cannot bear the injustices they witness, so fight for and with the underdog. I believe they’re the anarchists within the system.

Probably much of the agitation is under-valued and rarely credited, yet without recognising the importance of agitation and activism, change would be even slower than we see it now.

In other words, they’re both agitating the status quo and they’re equally valuable, if we’re to move into a more compassionate future.

We live in times when we are all crying out for change; a time when we need to be active, to be ‘doing’ something to improve our chances of survival on this planet and more immediately, our chances of surviving the enforced austerity by those who wish to divide our loyalties and keep us from uniting into one helluva powerful force.

Think about how many times in a day you see or hear propaganda for one thing or another; usually leading us into fear or a false dichotomy; that we have only two choices, this OR that.

Don’t be fooled – there are always many more options – we just need to open our minds (and our hearts) to explore them.

When we acknowledge or understand this, it’s our duty to ensure those alternatives are presented in such a way that everyone can relate to them; by re-introducing human into humanity and passion into compassion.

We must learn to be grateful for what we have and become unafraid of sharing; sharing wealth, sharing information and most of all, sharing care.

We are not separate – we rely on interdependence to survive and together we are not power-less, we are power-full.