1. The number one reason guys say they get a divorce is “I can’t do anything right in the relationship” (quoted from Dr John Gray-relationship expert ‘Men are from Mars Women are from Venus’). To make her happy……he needs to look at the little things to help relieve her everyday stress; not the big things like supplying a home to live in or having a good steady job. These things are great to have and crucial but it’s the little things that she’s complaining about and that usually make the relationship breakdown. …..it’s the not offering to cook or wash up, putting clothes away after being washed, not picking up your dirty clothes and putting them in laundry. It’s the little things that build up her frustration, not the big things!

2. To help reduce stress, is to both understand the dynamics of males & females and how they juggle their full time job, and then for many woman it’s like coming home to then start the second shift….if one partner is doing more than the other, that’s when resentment starts to set in.

Guys, resist from immediately parking your butts on the lounge and turning the TV on as soon as you get home from work; ask her is there anything she’d like you to do or help with? The most common complaint from females is “that he never helps around the house”. It will amaze you how something so small like hanging out a load of clothes from the wash will make her feel genuinely content and not get fired up when you do sit on the lounge to switch off and chill-out. Just remember to make the little things a habit not a one off!

3. Let her catch you staring at her. Stare at her the way you stared at her when you were first dating! Bet you would have starred longer entranced by her beauty. Make her feel sexy or pretty again just by looking at her longer with your softer loving eyes (a women will take your glare as a huge compliment and you won’t even have to say anything – it makes you think you feel she is attractive). If she likes being touched try adding a soft gentle touch by stroking the hair back behind her ear whilst looking at her beauty.

4. Look for opportunities to give positive messages! Complement each other daily. Make your partner feel good about themselves…spot them doing something right not something wrong! E.g. : “thanks honey for putting the lid on the toothpaste”, “thanks for coming home early , I really appreciate it”. By spotting them doing something right/good, it will help them want to repeat the behaviour.

5. Let your wife talk at end of day…Reframe from responding and trying to give solutions, remember, she’s just sharing ‘SO JUST LISTEN TO HER’ as she needs to vent and share. This reduces her stress as her brain releases a hormone called oxytocics that makes her feel better instantly!
Men you don’t need to say anything or fix anything, you don’t even need to plan a response… just look at her while she is talking so she feels like you are interested and caring. Understand that the woman’s hormone called oxytocics is on steroids when she shares her feelings with her partner and it’s NOT the same as a talking to a girlfriend…..just in case you wanted to palm her off to the phone and call a friend. There is a remarkably large difference in how much oxytocics’ is released when she is sharing with her partner. Let her release the feel good hormones!

6. Learn to break the routine and do something different monthly; go out for dinner to a new place, picnic, play pub pool and give her 2 shots to everyone of yours, go to the movies in a different location. Break the ‘NORM’ and experience new things together regularly like when you first started dating. Ask yourself “when’s the last time you did something for the first time together?” The main reason we love holidays is because you normally experience things together for the first time. The great thing is you don’t need an expensive holiday to recreate the same feeling of simply doing something for the first time.

7. Ladies help him feel like a man….let him do some manly stuff and also mingle with some males socially. It’s not being sexiest; it’s a clinically proven fact that there is natural gender intelligence that we are hormonally different. Let him socialize with some mates without giving him a hard time . Also help him feel like he can help at home with his strength and to be the protector…acknowledge him when he does. This feeds instantly to his serotonin and also increases his testosterone. This will unconsciously feed the female-male sexual attraction too, so there’s bonuses all round!

8. Studies show that role reversal is very dangerous for relationships. Ladies make sure you don’t emasculate him by dominating all the time e.g: continually giving him orders. When woman are handling everything in a relationship the male dopermean levels decrease because the neurons aren’t getting fired off…he starts to lose motivation in urgency and emergency senses. Role-reversal is very dangerous as the sexual attraction gets lost.

9. Ensure you continue to play a male & female role and not try to focus too much time on becoming equals in everything. The sexual relationship dies down. Studies prove many couples break up because they have become ‘just friends’ and the flame is missing. Continually work at stroking the male and female egos/roles in a relationship- let him feel strong and the protector, let her feel sexy and the nurturer.

10. Guys, ensure you don’t need nurturing too often and become too emotional as this will switch on the Females maternal nurturing instinct. If this is a continual pattern you run, eventually at an unconscious level it will start to turn the female off from you sexually. Many divorce rates show if he needs nurturing all the time she will see you more as a child or sibling relationship -the sexual attraction diminishes and the relationship is in turmoil. Understand woman want you to share your feelings and be emotional but just resist from falling into that pattern constantly- continue to show the masculine side too.

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1. Number 1 rule: wash in a lingerie bag! Why….. so it doesn’t hook onto the inside of your machine, break or stretch the hooks/fasteners. Also so it doesn’t grab everything else in sight in that wash…the mess I’ve had to untangle in the past ain’t pretty! (If you don’t have a linger bag- use a fine material -clean pillow slip and use an elastic band to tie it up at the end).
2. Ensure you fasten the hooks on the bra before washing. This will prevent them catching on other items in bag or if zipper comes undone.
3. For longer lasting colour in your bra ‘hand wash it’. Use cool water and a gentle soap made for delicate fabrics.
4. Air dry your bra after washing……….if you put it in the clothes dryer it will weakened the elastic ; however if you CAN’T resist ensure it stays in the lingerie bag so the hooks don’t get caught up in the other items plus also get bent & snap off.
5. Continually machine washing underwire bras can result in the wire coming out and lodging in your washing machine…..or even better your skin when wearing it. If you machine-wash these bras, make sure they’re inside a lingerie bag to extend its life of wear and tear.
6. Do not wash your bras after each and every wear. Rather wear at least two if not three times before washing.

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• University student $23k a year.
• Bar tender $38k a year
• Car park attendant $29k a year.
Not one man was arted higher then a 4 out of 10

They then swapped the test to the identical photo but changed the males earnings to high income earners and lavish job titles like:
• Music producer $250K .
• Goggle executive $138K
• TV producer $289K
All scores were 7 and up!

If this really is true how woman first judge a men if he stands a chance; well at least we can understand why a lot of men feel like they have to drop a few bombs on how good they are and talk themselves up to really try to impress us to show they are able to provide?
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2. When he takes the bra off his one step closer…..

3. It makes him fell like his unwrapping the present slowly.

4. He loves that it is feminine and completely different to what he wears: so she must be a chick…right? He hopes………..

5. Because it’s sexy!
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Let’s just go back to basic so we know we’re not leaving anything out.

Its easy as 1,2, 3

There are three areas you need to check when fitting a bra:

1) Back strap
2) Cup size
3) Shoulder strap.

The Back Strap

* The most common mistake is wearing the back strap too loose around the body, it may feel comfortable but it offers little support.

*When first buying a bra always fit it so it can start on the loosest hook as bras give up to 5cms over a year. This allows you to be able to adjust it when it happens and still have a functional bra.
* The back strap should be firm but comfortable, being able to fit two fingers underneath; this may be a little tighter than you are used too if you have been wearing the bra to loose. And if it’s been too tight at least now you can breath!

* You should be able to move in it without it riding up. If you are constantly tugging it down then it’s too large and you need to go down at least one back size.

* It should run in a horizontal position around your body, check by looking in the mirror.
*The back strap should sit 1 cm below your shoulder blades.

* You should be able to have your shoulder straps tightened reasonably firmly without it pulling the back strap upwards.

* There should be no spillage or pinching of the bust from underneath the bra cups, that’s a sure sign the back strap is too large.

The Cups
If you think all cups are the same your wrong.. So many women are unaware that the actual size of the cup of a bra changes when the back size changes. For example the cup size of a 14E is bigger than the cup size of a 12E. If you find the cup size of a 14E bra is OK, but you need a smaller back size, then you will need a 12F, as this will be the SAME size in the cups.”

* The bust should sit comfortably in the cups and should be fully encased. The wires should go around the bust completely including around the sides under the arms.

* There shouldn’t be anything popping out of the cups underneath the arms, around the sides or over the top if there is the cup is too small.

* The wires shouldn’t poke out under the arms or rub, if they do the cup is too small.

* The wires in the middle of the bra should lie flat against your chest. If they stick out then the cup size is too small.

* Balcony bras are cut lower so the boobs continue above the cups but there should be no ‘four boob’ or ‘double boob’ syndrome…it’s not a good look! The ‘four boob’ effect: You can see this clearly if you try your bra on with a t-shirt and look in the mirror. If you have a bulge over the top of your cup of your bra, even if it is only a ‘mini four boob effect’, then the cup is too small for you. If they bulge a little, you may need only one cup size larger. If they bulge a lot you may need to go up at least 2 or 3 cup sizes

•The bra should fit smoothly on the skin; if the fabric is loose or wrinkled then the bra is too big.

The Shoulder Straps

* So many woman are walking around with their straps too lose; you could fit a whole hands width sideways under the strap. You should be able to fit approx 2fingers width maximum under the shoulder strap. This will make them firm but not dig in or leave red marks.

* The weight of the bust should be supported mainly by the back strap and the cups. Try this test, loosen the shoulder straps, if everything plummets south then your back strap and cup size are not supporting you properly and you need to change size accordingly.

* If the shoulder straps are digging into your shoulders or you feel like you are being dragged down by them then you are probably wearing too large a back strap and your bust isn’t being supported enough so you are over tightening the shoulder straps to compensate, go down at least one back size.

* The shoulder straps shouldn’t slip off your shoulders, if they do tighten them a little or try a style with the straps closer together. Balcony bra’s tend to have wider set straps than other styles.

Ladies you really shouldn’t feel like you are wearing a bra; that way it’s comfortable to wear it all day.
You bra should be fully functional so you can not only look good in it you also have the proper support to have the freedom to move around all day.

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Are you and your partner bored? When was the last time you did something for the first time?
Do you ever experience boredom on weekends which then turns into the occasional argument with your partner because you have nothing exciting to do when you have time togther?

Well you’re not along. Apparently from a recent survey on Childless Aussie couples a staggering 87% said they often get bored and run out of things to do on their weekends off together.

Being in a relationship myself of nine years I too can associate with this. It wasn’t until after a fantastic 5 week honeymoon that I came back and wondered why we wait for holidays to do exciting stuff?
So I turned to my newly wedded husband and said “lets make a deal; every month we need to ask each other this question ‘when was the last time you did something for the first time?”

Just give this some thought for a second…… Why do we love holidays so much? It gives you the opportunity to experience new things which creates a massive impact in your life and gives you amazing stories to tell when you get back. You also know that when on holidays you have a tendency to try things for the first time; and in turn this usually takes us slightly out of our comfort zone.

Studies show that when you step out of your comfort zone it automatically has a direct effect on increasing our self confidence ( what we exuberate) and self esteem (our internal dialogue/ self talk). No wonder we feel so darn good about holidays; we have a massive neuro associated link of massive amounts of pleasure and feeling good about ourselves too. So why wait for that occasional holiday to get that hit when you can get it more often?

On Holidays we try different experiences like hand gliding, learning to surf, whale watching, parasailing, bridge climbing, hiking, exploring and horse riding to name a few. Perhaps we should be asking ourselves this question more often when we’re not fortunate enough to get away….”When was the last time I did something for the first time?” Either as couple or even if you’re rocking the single boat!

Perhaps in our everyday rat race we get too caught up in work, then spend some time with our family and a few social drinks at best. You leave all the different and exciting activities for holidays, however everyday off is a holiday isn’t?

Here is an idea for couples who want to spice up their days off.

Idea No#1:

My husband and I made a pact that we will take turns on the first Sunday of every month to surprise each other with either
1) An activity we haven’t yet done
2) A place we haven’t yet visited
3) An experience we haven’t yet experienced in our state

That way if the budget is tight for the month we can still experience something new; you just need to get a little creative like sight seeing, bush walking, or a picnic in an area you have never been before and that will not break the bank and you still have something exciting to do and experience together for the first time.

Idea No#2:

A friend of mine created an alphabet game for the weekends off that had nothing on.
All you do is start at the letter A and think of all the things you can possibly do that starts with the letter A. Then the following “I’m bored” weekend comes along and you move onto the letter B.

As I’m sure you have heard many times before our relationships (either with ourselves and/or with a partner) take a bit of effort we have to work at them a little. My question to you is even though you probably know this and have heard it before-do you do it? What have you got to lose accept a little effort; you know the rewards will be tenfold. Isn’t your relationship worth the effort?

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