Why the ambivalence? Because though authors and experts have many great ideas and research to back up what they’re saying, these things can come off as one-size-fits-all approaches to parenting that can be confusing and/or harmful.

Kids are individuals and sometimes as a parent you’re going to look unfair. I don’t see any way around it because each of my kids has different personalities, abilities, needs, likes and dislikes… They are different and–forgive my crazy talk–my wife and I don’t treat them exactly the same, discipline them the same, respond to them the same.

We love them all equally and abundantly, but they have to trust us when we allow one to do something another can’t or discipline one with a punishment that wouldn’t work with another.  They are individuals who are uniquely made by God. We have to treat them as such for them to flourish.

I wrote about equality from the human perspective, but taking this example I believe we can see the greatness and goodness of God.

We can get caught up with why something is not happening in our lives or why we have to face hardship or why, why, why. We look at our brother/sister in Christ who doesn’t seem to have to deal with this stuff and we think, “God, You’re being unfair. Why do I have to go through this?”

He knows the innermost parts of your being–every cell, every strand of DNA.

For You formed my inward parts; You wove me in my mother’s womb. I will give thanks to You, for I am fearfully and wonderfully made; wonderful are Your works, and my soul knows it very well. –Psalm 139:13-14

That means you can trust Him to take you down the perfect path at the perfect time and it won’t have anything to do with what He’s doing with anyone else.

We should be thankful. God is definitely not fair, but He is exceedingly good.

His thoughts toward you are incredible and outnumber even the sand on the seashore. Breathe that in. He’s taking His time because He knows you and that’s why He doesn’t deal with you exactly the same even in similar situations to someone else. He is so good.

What are your thoughts? Do you find yourself trapped in comparison (either in the negative or positive)? Do agree that it’s good that God is not fair?

Other posts you might like:

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Every good thing given and every perfect gift is from above, coming down from the Father of lights, with whom there is no variation or shifting shadow. –James 1:17

We live in a land that when we receive good things, we give credit to doctors, to lawyers, to stock brokers, etc. instead of remembering that He does not change and He has always been Healer, Provider, Defender of the truth, Deliverer, and all His word reveals Him to be.

Katie Davis was trying to help a child that was in desperate need. She needed medical attention that was inaccessible to her, but Katie understood that this is the nature of life.

Sometimes we look to God when we’ve exhausted all other options. We praise Him if a miracle occurs, but stay silent when we can give someone else credit or when what we prayed for doesn’t happen.

The reality is…

1. He’s worthy no matter what. He is still the Healer whether we recognize it and by whatever means He chooses to express that facet of His character. We need to praise! I still love the line of Matt Redman’s “Blessed Be Your Name” that says, every blessing you pour out I’ll turn back to praise. God is directly involved whether you realize it or not. May we be people filled with praise.
2. He works everything to good. Sadly, the little girl in Katie’s story died. We have all faced similar defeats in different arenas. I don’t believe that God’s plan is for little children to die or people to remain sick forever or poverty to reign, but for whatever reason these things happen and/or linger (and I won’t go into all that now), He still brings life and blessing out of tragedy for all those who trust Him because He is exceedingly good.

Jesus is the First and Last. He’s also the One who wants to be our first resort and not just our last when everything else has failed. Even if we do though, He still loves and expresses His powerful grace.

For those who understand, we get the privilege to praise and know Him no matter the circumstances.

That’s quite a good gift.

What are your thoughts? Do you ever fall into this trap? How do you keep your focus and praise centered on the goodness of God?

This is the part of our book club discussion for week 18 of Kisses from Katie (disclosure) by Katie Davis and Beth Clark. We are taking a sentence, paragraph, or passage that inspires, encourages, or challenges and writing about it. If you have a response on your blog, head over to my friend and co-facilitator, Sarah Salter’s blog for the widget and another great take. Whether you’ve read the chapter or not, please share your thoughts! We always appreciate a vibrant conversation.

Check out these conversations!

• Real Relationships Involve Pain – May 9, 2012
• Opposites Attract – May 2, 2012
• What about Education? – April 25, 2012

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When you look at our societal and cultural institutions, however, this is not the case. People have different abilities and skills. Some have passions in music or sports. Others are drawn to science or working with their hands. There are times to see through the prism of community and times to see the individual for who God created them to be.

For example, let’s say your child is not ready for preschool at age four. You try it out, but it becomes abundantly clear that this will not work. You struggle with the decision, but ultimately take him out because it’s intensely stressful for the child and you as parents.

Since everyone is supposed to be the same and all kids are supposed to be ready and go to preschool at age 4, people around you start to attempt a diagnosis of the “problem.” It’s the parents fault. It’s his childcare provider. There must be a chemical imbalance.

Instead of recognizing a unique person with unique abilities and limitations, some try to figure out what is wrong. In the attempt to promote fairness and equality, they are being decidedly unfair. Sometimes these fears and guesses can haunt a person with intense longevity.

…walk in a manner worthy of the calling with which you have been called, with all humility and gentleness, with patience, showing tolerance for one another in love, being diligent to preserve the unity of the Spirit in the bond of peace. –Ephesians 4:1-3

I looked around in our service on Sunday and brought up the fact that God put us together for a purpose, but if any of us were choosing different ones to be part of your church family, would you have picked each of these? I’m sure not, but He knows exactly what He’s doing.

There’s no reason to delve into constant identification of “what’s wrong with people” or “why do they still struggle with that” or any number of things. I’m privileged to show off some of this diversity in my own family with different cultural influences, backgrounds, and more. There are different abilities and everyone is just fine to be who they are.

If you are one who thinks they are so spiritual as to discern everyone’s weaknesses and problems around you then hopefully you’ll take the next step and faithfully love them beyond it, no matter how long it takes.

It doesn’t take a lot to discern people’s brokenness and lack, but we are called to encourage and stand with them until their fullness comes. The good news is, they’re called to stand with you as well.

What are your thoughts on this? Do you see this false view of equality in the world and the problems it can cause? What does this mean to the Body of Christ?

Other posts you might like:

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Speak a word, healing comes
Light invades where darkness numbs
Washed, cleansed in unheard of grace
Mercy bright to lift the afflicted face

Speak a word, motion stirs
Momentum builds, alignments emerge
Natural eyes may fail to recognize
But truth eradicates the power of ancient lies

Speak a word, the voice so clear
I’ll stake my life on the promise near
Bold, confident—steps toward glory
Unmatched wisdom, exalted authority

In solemn agreement with joyful accord
I see my salvation—Lord, speak a word.

Welcome to the 33rd edition of the Warrior Poet Circle. Time to pull up a seat, gather around the fire, and pour out our verses.

If you have a poem to add, please add it to the widget and be sure to visit the others who are a part too. Thank you!

Check out these conversations!

• Warrior Poet Circle (Vol. 32) – April 30, 2012
• Warrior Poet Circle (Vol. 31) – April 16, 2012
• Warrior Poet Circle: Streams – January 30, 2012

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Sanctuary–

1 : a place (as a church or a temple) for worship

2 : a place of refuge and protection

Meditating on the beauty He’s created and the power of His words…

Happy Mother’s Day

I chose this picture because my wife is an amazing mother and she blesses me every single day.
She just so happens to love the beach (this is from our family vacation last summer).

Proverbs 31:25-29
25 Strength and dignity are her clothing,
And she smiles at the future.
26 She opens her mouth in wisdom,
And the teaching of kindness is on her tongue.
27 She looks well to the ways of her household,
And does not eat the bread of idleness.
28 Her children rise up and bless her;
Her husband also, and he praises her, saying:
29 “Many daughters have done nobly,
But you excel them all.”

Reminder: The Warrior Poet Circle returns tomorrow and we’re writing honest poetry from our spiritual passion so I hope you’ll come, share your heart, and maybe express yourself in a little different way. If you have a poem to contribute, come and share it with everyone. If not, read what others have written and I know you’ll enjoy it. The link widget will be here Monday morning. See you then!

What’s your sanctuary this week? What thought, verse, etc. are you meditating on?

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⁵ Trust in the Lord with all your heart

And do not lean on your own understanding. –Proverbs 3:5

Have you ever leaned on something only to find that it couldn’t support your weight?

I have plenty of times. Sometimes I’m able to catch myself while other times I fall out flat. Trusting in our God is a huge part of the equation in a life of faith, but the temptation will surely come to try to figure things out on our own. We get the thought that God is taking too long. Or that we don’t have enough time. We don’t have enough resources. Our relationships aren’t strong enough to follow where He leads.

On and on it goes, we believe we’re trusting God but step A must be immediately proceeded by step B. We are not going to understand everything. Most times we have to act in obedience even though there is no logical reason we should. The action proves the trust which is why we cannot lean on our own limited understanding. If we do, we set ourselves up for paralyzing fear or settling for what we can accomplish on our own.

I truly believe that every believer–every Christ-follower–cannot help but live an amazing adventure. It won’t look the same for any two people, and what some consider an adventure, others would call mundane. That’s not the point. Each of us have the opportunity to launch past the excuses and our past and our doubts. We can trust Him into the impossible–not just once or twice, but over and over again.

We must have renewed minds, the very mind of Christ. Human understanding based on natural observations will stop us from enjoying the life of faith. In my understanding, I don’t see how we could have adopted (now three times with miracles abounding). In my understanding, I wouldn’t have come to Alaska in the first place. I wouldn’t have seen lives restored, bodies healed, marriages renewed, and on and on.

I’m so thankful that God doesn’t have to fit into my understanding, but He calls me into a higher reality and allows me to establish that reality on the earth.

Kingdom come. His will be done, on earth as it is in heaven. –Matthew 6:10

What do you take away from this verse? I would love to hear your thoughts.

Other posts you might like:

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And for even more great posts and favorites, be sure to visit Kevin Martineau’s blog as well.

• Approaching the Bible by Jonathan Welton (Rogue Theologian).
• Faithful til the end by Cris Ferreira (Just Cris).
• Birds by Bill Grandi (Cycleguy’s Spin).
• How to clarify expectations by Kevin Martineau (Shooting the Breeze).

And your random pic for this week…
Forget walking on egg shells, try sitting on them.
WHAT’S YOUR CAPTION?

Do you have a favorite post or link you want to share? Want to discuss one of my picks?

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Not so fast, it wasn’t just fine. Israel was sent fleeing as the men of Ai killed some and chased others down until “the hearts of [Israel] melted and became as water.” God wasn’t with them.

Joshua fell on his face before the ark and humbled himself with dust on his head saying,

“Alas, O Lord God, why did You ever bring this people over the Jordan, only to deliver us into the hand of the Amorites, to destroy us? If only we had been willing to dwell beyond the Jordan! O Lord, what can I say since Israel has turned their back before their enemies?  For the Canaanites and all the inhabitants of the land will hear of it, and they will surround us and cut off our name from the earth. And what will You do for Your great name?” –Joshua 7:7-9

A defeat is a very crucial time. We let thought patterns in at those vulnerable moments so that if we do not hear the voice of the Lord to counteract, we’ll get stuck. What was Joshua saying?

• God, You let us down. These guys will destroy us.
• We reached too far–we should have settled for less.
• Our reputation was soaring in the land! Now everyone will hear about this and defeat is our new normal.

We can all understand the frustration. They had a word and a promise. They were acting on what they’d been given. Why wouldn’t God just go ahead and do this “little” thing? It was for His people after all!

Through God’s actions and word, He makes it clear to them and us.

Sin had cut off the camp from God’s favor and victory. He wouldn’t allow them to see another victory until it was dealt with because their reputation as conquerors was not His concern. Israel was called out and raised up to display the greatness of God and He wouldn’t compromise that no matter what anyone (even His enemies) thought.

So the Lord said to Joshua, “Rise up! Why is it that you have fallen on your face?  Israel has sinned, and they have also transgressed My covenant which I commanded them. And they have even taken some of the things under the ban and have both stolen and deceived… Therefore the sons of Israel cannot stand before their enemies; they turn their backs before their enemies, for they have become accursed. I will not be with you anymore unless you destroy the things under the ban from your midst…” –Joshua 7:10-12

I believe there are a couple of keys here.

• God wasn’t overcome with dread or fear because of this sin. He says, “what are you doing down there on your face? Deal with this so we can move on, but if you don’t, I won’t be fighting for you.” He dealt with sin by sending Jesus to die on a cross and shed His own blood. We have been equipped to deal with it.
• Sin is not just personal, it’s communal. Joshua didn’t sin. The men who went up to fight didn’t sin. One man took things from Jericho that God said not to and it caused massive heartache and setbacks. This is not old covenant/new covenant stuff. We are always seen by God as individuals and in the context of community all the time.  My sin doesn’t just affect me. It affects everyone around me–keeps wreaking havoc and binding up– until it’s dealt with.
• A defeat never negates God’s previous word. Joshua was concerned that the people of the land would rise up and destroy them. He feared that maybe God’s word was not enough as he struggled to understand the defeat. God didn’t even address this because His word doesn’t change. Once we deal with the problem, we can enter the promise again.

What are your thoughts on this passage? Do you agree or disagree with what I’ve said?

Other posts you might like:

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So why do we maintain relationships? Because we also know the opposite is true. Relationships are fulfilling. They heal. They enter you into someone else’s life and triumphs and joys.

I have been in the midst of believing for a situation that involves people that I love dearly. It has not gone the way I had wanted. I believe God always wants restoration, but I also understand that every person has to make the choice to enter it. Without that decision from everyone involved, He cannot start the process of healing and things fall apart.

My wife and I have struggled and been stressed about all this. We have prayed and stood and reached out as best we can. It’s hard not to feel the weight of all of it, and you begin to wonder if any of it makes a difference at all.

As I read Katie’s story from this week’s chapter, I was reminded again that every time I have reached out to any broken and needy person I was joining in His heart and feeling His pain.

From Kisses from Katie by Katie Davis and Beth Clark

Carrying one another’s difficulties is central to the life of Christ, but it isn’t about simply feeling bad or fretting. It’s about believing for God’s heart and will. It’s declaring the wisdom and Kingdom of God into lives and situations.

Bear one another’s burdens, and thereby fulfill the law of Christ. –Galatians 6:2

As I’ve seen again, the miracle doesn’t always seem to materialize. Things don’t always end the way you want them to, but the pain I feel on my end is nothing compared to the pain that He feels. Lives are ripped apart. Dreams are broken. I love the people in the heart of this so it feels especially personal, but God shares it.

We attempt to live in compassion because He first loved and reached to us. We feel the pain too, but it doesn’t mean God isn’t there. He is not emotionally aloof or watching from a distance on His far off throne at bad choices and all the suffering. He is in the midst of all of it offering His hand of restoration and truth to the world and to us in thousands of moments and thousands of ways.

He chooses to share both the joys and the pain with those close to Him because of the relationship He has with us. That’s what makes us His friends.

Have you struggled with the pain of reaching out? Has it ever deterred you or do you recognize His compassion in the midst of it?

This is part of our book club discussion on Week 15 of Kisses from Katie (disclosure) by Katie J. Davis and Beth Clark. We are taking a sentence, paragraph, or passage that inspires, encourages, or challenges and writing about it. If you have a response on your blog, add it in the link widget below and be sure to check out the other entries. Also head over to my friend and co-facilitator, Sarah Salter’s blog for another great take. Whether you’ve read the selection or not, please share your thoughts! We always appreciate a vibrant conversation.

Check out these conversations!

• God of First and Last Resorts – May 16, 2012
• Opposites Attract – May 2, 2012
• What about Education? – April 25, 2012

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Imagine you’re finishing up your studies to be a doctor. You started with such a passion! You put in the time, worked hard to get the grades, and after all those classes, it’s time to graduate. You are thrilled at the accomplishment and so many are ecstatic with you! You can hardly believe it’s finally come.

Everything is in place, but there’s a problem nagging at you. Even though you have everything you need to begin practicing medicine, you just don’t feel like a doctor. You tried to work up the feeling, to reflect on what might be behind it, but your feeling never did match what you had gained so you decided this must not be your path.

What do you feel like? You wanted a job that was fairly simple and straightforward so you decided to get an application to run the counter at a gas station convenience store. The manager was a little leery of hiring someone so overqualified, but you convinced him that was right where you needed to be so he hired you.

Years passed and you never really did feel like a doctor so you stayed right where you were and made the best of it.

I think the sad thing is so many Christians live like this every day. They don’t feel like an overcomer or a world-changer so they go through life like they have nothing beyond what’s right in front of them.

This is not a metaphor knocking gas station attendants, but if you’re trained and ready to be a doctor, it doesn’t make sense to take this other position.

Fears and anxiety and pressures want us to back down and play it safe. We often don’t like to feel the responsibility that comes with what we’ve been given, but we must engage.

This is not about working for salvation. You have gifts that God gave you. Those gifts had (or have) to be developed and shaped into something more usable. Beyond your personal gifts, you have all the resources of heaven behind you so that His Kingdom would come and His will would be done on earth as it is in heaven.

In the illustration, the person never became a doctor. Why? A doctor can only be called a doctor when he is practicing. In other words, he’s a guy with a fancy paper on his wall until he steps out and does something to help people.

You can tell people over and over that you’re a Christian, but if they don’t see the evidence in the way you live your life and act, there is something wrong.

James 2 tells us plainly that faith without works is dead and useless. Even demons believe He’s God and He’s great, but truth means something and becomes a part of us when we put it into action.

Do you ever fall into the trap of following feeling over faith? Is there an action step you can take today to show your faith?

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