Big Butt – Need I explain? There is no exaggeration here. I had lunch with his friends a few times, and even they comment on it. o.o Nice enough guy, but it literally looks like he walks around flaunting it like J-Lo or something.

Scripted Guy – This guy is pretty creepy. He’s very nice, but every time he says anything to us it sounds like he’s talking into a camera on a really bad sitcom. We’ll be eating, and he’ll come up (with a huge obnoxious smile that never disappears) and be like “How’s it goin’ guys?! Enjoyin’ that lunch?”. Now, this doesn’t sound abnormal, but picture someone saying these things in a scripted voice with a huge creepy smile (like the troll smile!).

Larper – He larps. As in Live Action Role Play. And we don’t know his name but find him pretty fascinating, so we had to give him an alias. This one seemed appropriate.

Precious – This one’s a little mean, but it’s completely fitting. In our history class my first semester of sophomore year, there was this girl who refused to get out of my seat (we had assigned seating), and she looked JUST like Precious (as in the movie Precious). So naturally we had to call her that from then on.

Spy – Everyday while eating in the cafeteria we noticed this guy always wearing dark clothes and sunglasses (INDOORS!), so we call him Spy.

These are just the ones we encounter most often. There are many, many more. Some may call it mean, but I call it entertainment. It makes stories more interesting when you have descriptive nicknames for people involved in the story. :D

Have you ever made up nicknames for people?

Jessica

So this is what led me to make my appointment. I did LOTS of research about first time exams, talked to friends, talked to the nurse, etc. I was FULLY prepared and actually reasonably calm. If you ask any woman if it hurts, most of them will say “no, it just feels uncomfortable”. Oh, or that you’ll feel “pressure”. Well, I did NOT feel ‘pressure’ unless pressure means intense pain! It was so much worse than I thought it would be. I am a virgin – so anyone that is having sex about to go in for your first pelvic, do not be alarmed!

My doctor was very nice and tried to talk me through it. But as soon as the pain began, I totally panicked. I clenched together which only intensified the pain causing her to have to spend more time getting the speculum in. And while this cold metal was creeping up my vag, there I was cringing and acting a total fool.

If you are scared to go in, I encourage you to ask for a Valium if you don’t think you will be able to relax! I’m not advocating drugs, but you don’t want a horrible experience to discourage you from ever going back. My mom said, “well now you’ll be totally okay going next year since you know what to expect”. No no no – more like, I won’t want to go at ALL next year unless I have something to relax me because I DO know what to expect.

In summary, it was a horrible experience for me, but I highly doubt everyone has that much trouble with it. I just wanted to point out that you HAVE to relax to avoid pain. And if you don’t think you can, take something that will make you! I hope no one ever has that experience. I am not sorry I went because now I’ll know if I have something really wrong with me. Regardless of whether or not you’re sexually active, or whether or not you’re experiencing problems of any kind – it’s important to get it checked out because of the danger of cancer.

And now, as my mom said when we got in the car, I am a woman. Of course, I always thought that I had become a woman when I started my period. I guess she’ll tell me again when I birth a child.

Jessica

Oh, and by the way, my dry socket is healing quite nicely! I went back to the nurse and told her to take that clove oil out of my mouth. It was poisoning all my food, and I couldn’t escape the taste, even after a couple days from her taking it out. But luckily the pain wasn’t too bad, and everyday I can open my mouth a little wider without pain! :)

Nothing else is really new. I’ve been spending my days sitting inside my house being completely miserable. I can’t drive because I have epilepsy and had a seizure a few months ago. So basically all of my personal freedom has been stripped away, and I can’t even find a job because the economy’s so bad! So really I should be glad to be going back up to school, but I guess part of the reason is because my ex-boyfriend of six years is home for summer. He goes to school all the way across the country, so we decided to split because being together was putting a strain on our relationship. And though I think it was the best decision, every time we see each other again it’s like nothing’s changed.

Love is so hard. And I’ll end it there.

Jessica

So I thought this was all a little odd being that I think a week after the operation you should be making SOME progress. So my mom called the oral surgeon and asked about my symptoms. Two words: dry socket. Now, I wouldn’t be as upset about this if I had smoked or sucked out of a straw. But I followed all the rules! And I still got it!

And let me tell you – it HURTS and the treatment is NOT pleasant. I went in today and got it “packed” with this thing that looks like an onion [and tastes a lot worse]. It’s a brown slimy thing that they shove into the socket and burns if it touches anything else. It trickled down my throat and got all over my cheek.

However, I think I have started to feel a little relief. And it’s not as bad as I thought it would be. I read all over the internet that the pain is so severe that you almost pass out. Well – that’s not true at all, or it wasn’t for me. So if anyone out there thinks they may have it/is worried about getting it – don’t worry, it’s not unbearable.

The first day of treatment is the worst apparently. I have to go back three more days and let them take the old packing out and repack it. Hopefully it gets better soon.

Jessica

So anyways, after doing some research about methods of reducing facial redness and sensitivity, I stumbled upon recommendations of green tea. When I went trucking to Wal Mart and looked down the huge row stocked with every acne product and face wash that anyone could ever want, I found it! The secret ingredient to my life of beautiful skin! – (Ok, I’m exaggerating and over-embellishing, but I really do love this stuff.)

St. Ives Naturally Clear Green Tea Cleanser

It smells great, feels good, and most importantly – doesn’t leave my skin all red and blotchy. The only thing it does do is dry my skin, but I have dry skin anyway and have yet to find a cleanser that doesn’t do that.

So in combination with that cleanser, I bought some Dollar General $3 beauty cream (which I know is a risk to take) but so far I’ve had no new breakouts and have noticed that the red spots on my face are less noticeable. The moisturizer makes my skin a little oily, so I only apply it on the dry spots on my cheeks and it works like a charm.

I’ve read reviews about it and know that it doesn’t work for everyone. But if you have a problem with redness or “blotchy-ness”, I’d give it a shot.

The pillow had all these tacky sequins on it, so I cut those off.

Then I cut up my shirt, making sure I had more than enough material to cover one side of the pillow.

I pinned it onto the front of the pillow and started hand sewing it (directly to the pillow). At first I tried to sew the front and back parts of the pillow cover together, but that was a total fail moment. So I did one side at a time, and it worked out much better.

I didn’t worry too much about getting my stitches even on that part since it would be covered. I folded over the other fabric so I wouldn’t have to worry about straight cutting, especially since this was my first time sewing! If you’re a beginner sewer, this video will teach you how to secure a knot to begin and tie off at the end.

The hardest part for me was sewing the corners. Since I hadn’t cut the fabric straight and was using the fold over method, I had all this extra fabric that I didn’t know what to do with. I ended up cutting the excess and just tucking the little pieces in to be sewn. All in all I think it turned out okay for my first time sewing! :)

Jessica

Before
Be prepared to stop eating and drinking the night before your surgery. They will give you a list of rules, and this will be one of the most important. Why? Because they don’t want you to choke on your vomit (as disgusting as that sounds) during the surgery. I recommend you drink LOTS of water the day before. I didn’t drink enough water the day before, so the day of the surgery I was SO thirsty and unable to drink anything. I was then completely dehydrated long after the surgery because the thought of drinking made me completely nauseous.

What’s Going to Happen?
This is my account, and this can vary from person to person, but they will let you know what to expect during your consultation. If you are treated the same way as me, you will be set up in the chair, have your blood pressure and pulse monitored for about 5-10 minutes, and then the doctor will come in. They’ll give you an IV (if you are being completely sedated – which I highly recommend if your teeth are impacted) and that will be the last thing you remember of the surgery.

After
You’ll likely still be drugged when you leave and will hardly remember going home. Make sure you take a pain pill before you go to sleep! You don’t want to wake up from a deep sleep in agonizing pain. You probably won’t be able to talk much that day – partially because of discomfort – partially because of the huge wad of gauze that will be in your mouth. And for me it hurt my throat to talk because I was so dehydrated.

You will probably feel nauseous that first day from swallowing blood and/or from the pain medicine. I was so nauseous that I couldn’t take a sip of water, and every time I opened my mouth blood poured out. The gauze has to be changed every 20-30 minutes until the bleeding stops. Luckily for me it stopped the first day.

Take advantage of pain-free moments to eat and drink as much as you can. I actually found that the pain wasn’t nearly as bad as I thought it would be. It was mostly my jaw that hurt when I opened and closed my mouth, but it wasn’t unbearable even after going a long time without pain medicine. Your face will probably be swollen for a few days, especially if you have a small face. You can use ice for the first few days to reduce it. After a while they recommend you switch to heat (for reasons I do not know – I personally found that the ice worked better).

What Do You Eat?
For the first couple of days you probably won’t have an appetite, but when you get hungry again it’s miserable having to eat soft food while everyone around you is crunching on chips and real food. My oral surgeon said to stay on soft food for a week, but I think if you feel you’re ready, you can slowly work your way up to solid food.

Until you get to that point, I recommend oatmeal, soup, mashed potatoes, mac and cheese, smoothies, milkshakes, yogurt, ice cream, applesauce, jello, and whatever other soft foods you can think of!

Just remember: Do NOT drink out of a straw, unless you want dry sockets and excruciating pain. The soft food/liquid diet gets really old really fast, so I recommend eating lots of different things so you don’t get sick of the same food day after day.

Jessica

Alright, I am not dissing technology at all. I love technology. My computer is one of my closest friends. HOWEVER, I think the way people use technology is becoming totally ridiculous. For example: I think it is completely unnecessary for little kids to carry a DS around with them everywhere. Whatever happened to kids being content with taking a shopping trip? That used to be a fun outing for me when I was little! And my mom would have slapped me in the face if I threw a fit about being bored and whining for some stupid video game.

Another thing – what is up with DVD players in cars?! A car is a piece of machinery used to transport people from point A to point B. When in the WORLD did it become a home theater experience to drive to Wal Mart??? If your kid can’t shut up for the 10 minute drive to the grocery store, you should not be a parent!

I remember a time long ago when family road trips were the best times of my life. Did I have a DVD player to entertain me during the car ride? Of course not! The car ride was my favorite part! We played games and talked and sang songs together. It was awesome, and I’d still enjoy doing that stuff. In fact, I can’t wait to do it with my kids.

Slowly and slowly we’re getting more disconnected from each other. Walk into a household and the parents are on their cell phones or using their PDA’s to get in touch with work, teenagers are on Facebook or texting, kids are playing video games. What happened to family game nights? What happened to kids being excited about ordering a pizza and watching a movie with their parents?

I just don’t get it.

So here we are, a step up from my previous theme. I did figure out how to use custom fonts which was really dainty. :D But would you believe it took me 3 days to put this stupid theme together?! It’s my fault though, I changed my mind a hundred times about color schemes and fonts and look and feel. Another day when I don’t have hand cramps and a stiff neck, I will figure out how to implement CUTE threaded comments. :)

In other news, I’m having my wisdom teeth taken out tomorrow. They gave me a valium to take 30 mins prior to the surgery, and I’m getting anesthesia through an IV. A lot of my friends have had them taken out, but everyone I talked to just got laughing gas, so they weren’t totally knocked out. I’m a little apprehensive about going under since I’ve never had surgery in my life. I’ve been acting like it’s no big deal, but now that I’m less than 12 hours from a knife in my mouth, I’m scared!

My mom has always told me, “Fear of the unknown is the greatest fear of all.” And now I agree 100%.

Anyway, if all goes well I shall be back to posting regularly, and you can probably expect a full account of the recovery process! :D

Jessica