Daddy Forever

A Fistful of Bubbles

Daddy Forever — Tue, 22 Jul 2008 07:01:53 +0000

Why do kids find delight in a simple thing like blowing bubbles? To be honest, I still like bubbles. But on my list of things that make me happy, blowing bubbles would not be anywhere near the top. I’m not sure what would be at the top of my list, but I think it might involve an island in the tropics, my wife, lingerie, and whip cream.

I wonder, at what point do kids lose their love of simple things and become infatuated with video games, iPods, $200 jeans, boobs, and six-pack abs? And at what point do kids start worrying about being cool and prefer not be seen with mom and dad in public? Tell me. Inquiring minds want to know.

Trying to turn the swimming pool into a bubble bath

Look at all the bubbles I’m making

Freeze or I’ll shoot you with my bubbles gun

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The Transformer Bike

Daddy Forever — Tue, 15 Jul 2008 07:01:37 +0000

Spiderboy got an Optimus Prime Transformer bike for his birthday from the weirdo-in-law. Spiderboy picked it out himself (the bike, not the weirdo). I was hoping he would go for the Spiderman bike because it would match his Spiderman helmet. The Optimus Prime bike is cooler, but I’m fairly certain he’s breaking several fashion laws when he rides his Transformer bike with his Spiderman helmet and pads. I wonder if he gets his fashion sense from me.

When it comes to riding bikes, my kids are behind the curve. My son didn’t figure out how to ride a toy bike until near the end of last summer. By toy bike, I mean one of those Fisher Price bikes with plastic wheels and no brakes. The Little Princess was even worst. She wasn’t ready for her Strawberry Shortcake bike until she turned six. Even then, she freaked out every time she had to go downhill. And I’m not talking about a big, steep hill. More like a gentle, one-degree slope. And she’s still using training wheels. But I’m fairly certain any day now, someone will break into our garage and steal those training wheels right off of her bike. And nothing else will be stolen. Very mysterious.

After taking Spiderboy bike riding several times, I’ve concluded a couple of things. First, my son isn’t exactly the brightest kid around. His preferred method for stopping involved crashing his bike into a curb. Most kids would just use the brakes. The other thing I’ve concluded is that Spiderboy is easily distracted. When he’s riding, he’s too busy looking to his left or right instead of where he is going. He doesn’t even notice when he starts veering to the other side of the street, to the curb, or at me. Before the month is over, I’m fairly certain he will smack into a parked car. Sorta like the time I walked right into the window display at the mall and fell on my rear.

Spiderboy on his new Transformer bike

Little Princess and her Strawberry Shortcake bike

I’m fairly certain Mommy Forever wasn’t sitting on the Little Monkey’s lap

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Holiday Time

Daddy Forever — Wed, 09 Jul 2008 07:29:12 +0000

It’s been five days since the Fourth of July and I still seem to be stuck on holiday time. Not sure why. Maybe there’s a tear in the time-space continuum and any minute now, the starship Enterprise will show up, save the universe, and take me back to real time.

Even though the Fourth was only a three-day holiday this year, I feel like I learned a lot. For instance:

Ready to Retire
Some people love their jobs and would be sad when they retire. Not me. When I retire, I’ll be on cloud 9.2. I don’t hate my job, but I don’t love it either. It’s just a means to an end (ie - buying toys for the little monsters). I wouldn’t mind being on holiday for the rest of my life. I’m not lazy. I just don’t enjoy trying to balance work and family life.

Boring Fireworks
After seeing the fireworks show at Disneyland, watching fireworks in our area is a bit disappointing. We didn’t even have a soundtrack like they did at Disneyland. And driving back home was like driving in smog or fog. Way too much smoke.

No Wait at Olive Garden
The weirdo-in-law took us to Olive Garden. Apparently, you can get a table right away on the Fourth for lunch. There was hardly anyone there. The long wait at Olive Garden is the main reason why we have not eaten there in a couple of years. When you have kids, waiting is like torture. Kinda takes the fun out of eating out.

Speedo
I saw the US swim trials on TV over the weekend and finally saw the new Speedo suits. Sorry ladies, you can’t gawk at men in a skimpy Speedo anymore. The new swim suit looks like a woman’s swim suit. The new Speedo covers almost the entire body and they even have shoulder straps. The things guys do to get an edge.

Kids Workshop
We finally made it to the kids workshop at Home Depot this year. Spiderboy and the Little Monkey each built a pirate ship and the Little Princess made a tray. Now for the problem. We have accumulated many, many Home Depot kids projects over the years. Most of them are piling up in our garage. We don’t really want to throw them away, but we’re running out of space. What to do, what to do.

The goofy face Spiderboy strikes again.

Someday the Little Princess will serve us breakfast in bed with that tray.

The Little Monkey really did build a pirate ship all by herself.
Pay no attention to the mad woman next to her.

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A Pool is a Kid’s Best Friend

Daddy Forever — Tue, 01 Jul 2008 07:01:07 +0000

Sometimes you can never win as a dad. You do something fun like take the kids to Disneyland. Then you discover one of their favorite parts of the trip was swimming in the hotel pool. And that’s when you realize you’re spending a zillion dollars so the kids can go swimming. Then you get a glimpse of the future. A future where you foot the tuition to medical school and the kids end up frying burgers for a living. For goodness sake, the pool didn’t even have a slide, cool water sprays, or scantily clad women. It was just a plain, medium size, swimming pool.

But you know what? I can’t really blame the kids. Because of incredible good luck, we arrive at Disneyland just in time for a heat wave (Portland was in the 60’s when we left — a 40 degrees swing). The kids loved the Disney rides, but the rides only last a few minutes and you have to wait 30 minutes to an hour for most of the good rides. For ten rides, that comes out to 36,000 seconds in the blistering sun while your kids’ brain turns to goo. It was so hot, steam was coming out of their ears. OK, I made that part up, but it was super nova hot. Even a dorky dad like me can see why the kids wanted to go swimming.

Apparently, the heat wave followed us home (yeah, more incredible good luck). It was 101 degrees on Saturday. Perfect time to setup our pool and cool off. My guess is that our kids will have as much fun with our pool as they did at Disneyland. Even better, our pool will provide fun for several more summers and the pool only cost $25 (purchased on clearance last Fall — thank you Target). So there you have it, Daddy’s Law #689 — a pool is a kid’s best friend.

Check out the Forever Aquatic Park!

Anyone want to join me?

The swim cap is the key to winning Olympic gold in Beijing.

Princess-powered boat.

Can you tell I love our new pool?

Anyone see my red underwear?

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The Magic Kindgom

Daddy Forever — Tue, 24 Jun 2008 07:01:54 +0000

Last week, we took the kids on a three-day trip to Disneyland. The week before, we told them the zoo trip was their birthday present (are they gullible or what?). Boy were they surprised when we flew them in our zillion-dollar Learjet to Disneyland. Speaking of planes, has anyone noticed the wings block the view out the window. Can’t someone design a plane without wings? How hard can that be?

The Disney trip was partially subsidized by our economic stimulus check. Normally, I would have just saved the money for a rainy day (literally - we have four roof/gutter leaks to repair!). But life is too short. I decided I should take the family on a fun vacation this year. You know, before the kids grow up and hate me for never taking them to Disneyland.

This was the first time our kids have been on an airplane. The first time all five of us have been on a vacation together. And the kids’ first trip to Disneyland (it’s also the first time my wife and I have been to the Magic Kingdom in ten years). Disneyland was very fun and very tiring. I’m still trying to recover. The last couple of days, I felt like I was doing everything in slow motion.

Disneyland Favorites

Little Princess - Haunted Mansion
Spiderboy - Splash Mountain and Buzz Lightyear Astro Blasters
Little Monkey - playing in the water fountains
Mommy Forever - shopping
Daddy Forever - air-conditioned rides with short lines

Disneyland Photos

Little Princess and Spiderboy join The Incredibles.

Spiderboy guarding Pooh’s honey pots.

Cooling off in the pool.

Minnie Mouse adopts the Little Princess.

My son literally drove me crazy on the Autopia ride.

My little swinger at Tarzan’s Treehouse.

Spiderboy and dad saving the Galactic Alliance. Lookout Zurg!

The newest bug wearing her Bug’s Life 3D glasses upside down. So trendy.

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