In the never-ending and possibly futile race to keep up with our children’s technology, I am always looking for an advantage. Sometimes it is simply learning how to upload photos in new software, other times it is making sure my children understand their online responsibility and safety.  In this case, one tool that can help is an educational app designed to simulate a social network, while teaching correct behavior and how to deal with online pitfalls.

‘BeSeen’ is a single-player game that simulates a social networking site where players create a profile and travel through a condensed school-year, with each game day equaling a fraction of a minute in real life. To earn awards, the player must make positive choices when presented with challenging social situations and solve puzzles along the way. The game is designed to help kids understand responsible online behavior such as securing their personal information, protecting their privacy and defending their peers against cyber bullying.

Best of all it is free in the Android market.   ‘BeSeen’ was developed for Web Wise Kids in collaboration with The Wireless Foundation and Trend Micro Internet Safety for Kids and Family , with additional funding from The Verizon Foundation.

“Here at Web Wise Kids, we are thrilled by the opportunity to introduce our app ‘BeSeen’ to the Android Market,” says Judi Westburg Warren, president of Web Wise Kids. “Entering this exciting marketplace allows us to reach thousands of kids on the topic of online safety and digital citizenship.”

The free mobile app, ‘BeSeen ’ is now available for download in the Android Market here: https://market.android.com/details?id=com.cylab.BeSeen

It is also available for download in the iTunes App Store.

“Some of the best feedback we are hearing from parents is that they enjoy how ‘BeSeen’ is a way for their kids to take a ‘test run’ on a social network before going so far as to register on an existing website,” continues Judi Westburg Warren. “We are excited that this app allows us to prepare youths for the digital world in a responsible and fun manner.”

Check it out and let us know what you think.

Ah, the first day back to school. The clothes to wear, the new lunchbox, the friends and rivals gone missing for three months. New classroom, new teacher, new school. These are just some of the things students stress over from kindergarten through the rest of their academic career. A child’s anxiety over these first-day details inevitably leads to stress for us as well.  So what is the best way to deal with the nerves on both sides? Here are some of my favorite tips to make the transition run smoothly.

• Many schools have open house days before the school year begins. Take take advantage of these and take a tour with your children. Knowing where to go the first day is a big relief from that doe-eyed look when entering the front doors. If going into junior high, walk the classrooms with them. Show them how to work their locker. Walk into the bathrooms.

• In summertime we all let some rules slip, particularly around bedtime schedules. A week before school begins, start getting your kids back on schedule. Also make sure to get yourself on schedule–kids are fed, dressed and able to be at the bus or dropped off on time.

• When a child comes home from school hating every minute of it, instead of going into problem solving mode as fathers are prone to do, instead just listen. The best solution is to allow them solve the problem themselves. Ask them, “What do you think you can do to make this better?” Help guide them to the right answer. Part of school is learning about conflict resolution and we are an active part of teaching that process.

• On the CBS Early show, parenting expert Shannon Eis strongly recommended parents getting the paperwork taken care of early.   “Parents have lots of to-do’s, and they often come in the form of paperwork from the school — so get organized early. Be sure to review the material sent by the school as soon as it arrives.”  She suggested starting a file system to keep school paperwork organized.

These are some of the valuable tips I’ve picked up as I get ready for our boys first year of school. Now let’s hear some of yours.

Jennifer L. Jacobsen, director of PR and Social Media for the electronics review blog, Retrevo.com,  has compiled some interesting statistics regarding how us parents use social media in our daily lives. The respondents in the study consisted of over 1,000  online individuals in June of 2011, compiled by an independent panel.

The study found:

• 18% of parents say they feel like they couldn’t stop using Facebook/Twitter even if they wanted to.
• 47% of parents of kids under 19 say they’ve used Facebook to learn more about their kid’s friends.
• iPhone owning parents (iParents) are twice as likely (28%)  to get anxious when they don’t check Facebook/Twitter as most parents (14%).
• Dads are more likely (13%) to use Facebook to learn about their kid’s dates than moms (10%).
• - iParents are twice as likely to use Facebook to learn about their kid’s dates than Droid owning parents.
• iPhone owning parents are four times LESS likely to have under 50 Facebook friends.
• 32% of iParents have over 250 friends (compared with 23% of other parents).

Check out the full article here.

Ah, the elusive parent workout. How do we stay motivated with shifting schedules and the obvious distractions that children bring? How do we get it in without feeling that we are sacrificing time with our children? Without nearby family or choosing childcare to give us some free time, one of our biggest workout challenges as dads is when the kids are within earshot or closer.

The first option is the home gym. It is available right when you need it, perfect for the unpredictable schedule. Before wake up, during nap, after bedtime, it’s there. And it can take as much or as little space as you’d like. An entire core workout can be built around a Swiss Ball and some hand weights. The challenge with the home gym is you have to maintain a focused mindset to get a daily sixty-minute workout. I know how it goes. How often do we buy a new piece of exercise equipment with the best intentions only to have it shoved in a back room and used as a coat rack six months later? Staring at the same walls day after day is a motivation killer. Forming a routine and setting health goals is essential to staying motivated. Lay out a workout schedule plan before you lay down the dough for a treadmill. Add other tasks to your workout for variety. Catch up on the news. Answer your texts. Make it “your time.” To further help your motivation, put your workout clothing on when you get dressed in the morning. It will remind you of your commitment, and lets you get right to it when the opportunity comes.

And just because children are awake doesn’t mean you can’t get in a little strength training. Try a few push-ups with a little one on your back. Almost always they’ll encourage you to do more. Do bicep curls with a barbell and let your child model you with a rolling pin. This way you get your workout in and also teach them how to enjoy exercise.

Because workouts can be spaced through the day, it is important to document all your exercise to stay excited about your accomplishments. There are some software options to track your exercise but I’ve always preferred hand writing my workouts in a notebook. One of my favorite tools is the Body Minder Workout and Fitness Journal.  Each “day” consists of two pages with an organized, easy-to-use layout for recording workout details…from equipment & settings, to reps & sets, to difficulty level, to heart rate, to muscle groups, and more. There is also space for listing the details of other (non-gym) exercise…from walking the dog, to playing a sport, to dancing. In addition, each day’s meals can be recorded as well as any vitamins or supplements taken.

I feel the most important motivator is the community of fellow parents also trying to stay in shape.  There are local groups throughout the country to give you inspiration and great online resources for finding them. Many can be found on the site Meetup.com.  Just type in your zip code and search whatever type of exercise you are looking for. For more of a party atmosphere sign up for a local event. Don’t be afraid of the word, “Race.” You don’t need to consider yourself an athlete to be welcomed. It is simply a gathering of people with a positive attitude about sport. You’ll see and meet plenty of parents pushing their children in double strollers to the finish line.  Active.com lists local events by zip code, everything from kayaking to Ironman Triathlons. It has great training tips and you can sign up for races directly through their site.

So with spring arriving, it’s time to concentrate on getting our bodies tuned up for the summer. Develop a plan that works for you.  And be sure to share your successes and challenges so we can help motivate one another!

Children the world over share some common loves. Chicken nuggets and french fries. Bipedal talking livestock. And let’s add one more–Butts. The first time I used the word “butt” with one of my sons, he giggled uncontrollably repeating the word to himself for the rest of the day. It was as if it were hardwired in his brain, somewhere between “Mama” and “More“.  Of course it is not the most productive concept to be able to identify the derrière of every living and inanimate object on the planet. Many parents understandably choose to shoosh the behavior altogether. Now there is a place to channel all that untamed observational skill. Children’s author Artie Bennett has captured all-things-butt in his charming children’s book, The Butt Book.

As a parent, I was immediately struck by the kinetic, engaging illustrations provided by Mike Lester. But as I’ve learned in the past, colorful artwork alone doesn’t guarantee a child’s interest. Fortunately, the story in The Butt Book is just as engaging. The rhyming narrative is well-formed and sets a good rhythm for parents to follow. It delves into the who, what, and why of butts without sinking into anything close to offensive.

In our field test, our twin three year old boys sat fascinated. They jabbed at the illustrations, and laughed at the animated storytelling. They giggled together repeating the word, “Butt!” between one another. They sneak this book off the bookshelf to read it to themselves. The Butt Book reminds us what a good children’s book can do–tap into a child’s interest without ever seeming like it is coming from the adult world. This has quickly become one of their favorite books, and I suspect will become the same for many others.

Click here for reviews & pricing on Amazon.

I love music. I should say, I love good music. So in coming to parenthood I discovered a whole new layer of musical crap I never knew, or cared to know, existed. Unfortunately it is practically unavoidable. It is the soundtrack to our children’s early years. It gets played over intercoms at children’s events. Grandparents buy it as a gift from the Wal Mart discount bin. Animatronic rats sing it at birthday parties while we’re eating pizza. I’m guessing that much like the children’s lit market, every second rate musician thinks they have a children’s CD in them to spring upon the world. The problem is most confuse “children” with “simple”. I have no desire to hear another song by a theater major hack singing about smiles and rainbows. I’m not asking for adult music about relationships or satan here. Just some good tunes and smart lyrics that say the same things I would say to my children. Is this asking too much?

Well, after wading through the sludge, here are two CDs I can recommend to pull you through. Children bond to them and parents will want to hear them again. Let’s hear your favorites too.

Ralph’s World: At the Bottom of the Sea

Ralph’s World is the creation of Ralph Covert: indie rocker, songwriter, playwright, and children’s book author. He’s taken the same high-energy and super-melodic sense that he developed for his touring pop-rock band The Bad Examples to family music- basically only the lyrics are changed for the ears of the innocent. His McCartneyesque style (both musically and his sense of charm) has won him hundreds of thousands of three-feet-and-under fans and their parents. At the Bottom of the Sea is my personal favorite.

For details and pricing click here.

Jack Johnson: Sing-a-Longs and Lullabies from the Film Curious George

Former pro surfer turned singer-songwriter Jack Johnson is a native of Hawaii, and his music reflects the laid back surfer attitude and crystal clarity of the water. Sweet, simple, acoustic surfer-rock is Johnson’s specialty and each of his five studio albums have found an increasing audience.

Sing-A-Longs and Lullabies sold more than 150,000 copies in its first week and was the first of Johnson’s albums to reach No.1.  For details and pricing click here.

Now, the ultimate children’s CD has yet to be burned. Sesame Street has had some of the greatest guest musicians appear on their show over the past forty years, but has not yet released a compilation of these artists. Johnny Cash, Elton John, REM, Feist, James Taylor, Aaron Nevil, Ray Charles, Norah Jones, Paul Simon and Billy Joel, to name a few. I’d be outside Best Buy with a sleeping bag and cold fast food for this one. For a taste, check out this vintage Sesame Street performance:

In a different Pennsylvania courthouse than he was sworn in as Luzerne County Commissioner,  Greg Skrepenak was sentenced on corruption charges. He received two years in jail for accepting $5,000 from a developer who received government-backed financing.  His years as an NFL and University of Michigan football lineman, made little difference in the outcome. Instead, after pleading guilty Skrepenak asked for leniency as a single father.  It was “Greg Skrepenak’s “unparalleled devotion” as a single father that should win him a reduced sentence on the corruption charge, his attorney stated.  Skrepenak’s ex-wife is currently serving a prison sentence on drug-related charges and suffers from addiction.  Skrepenak’s attorney filed a motion for leniency stating,  “Historically, sentences for females and single female parents have statistically and significantly been less harsh than those of their male counterparts.”

Skrepenak ultimately received two years in prison. The charge carries a maximum of ten years in prison and a 250,000 fine, but was expected to fall somewhere between 33-41 months under federal sentencing guidelines. Most commentary from the public pressed for a harsher penalty, the mantra of many being “you do the crime, you do the time”.  Others felt he was just using his children to get out of prison.

I wonder, would the same sentence or harsh public opinion exist if all genders in the situation were reversed?

In a victory for civil rights, Proposition 8, a voter initiated ban on gay marriage in California has been reversed. California courts found the discrimination of individuals wanting to legally marry unconstitutional. Supporters of Proposition 8 argued the ban was necessary to safeguard the traditional understanding of marriage and to encourage responsible childbearing. What bullshit. “Responsible childbearing?” So the supporters of the ban are “responsible” for teaching their children bigotry?

The reason this issue is so important to me, and hopefully to you, is that we as fathers struggle to be recognized as able, nurturing parents to our children. The idea that traditional roles are the only way to raise children is an indirect assault on the new ways fathers are learning to parent their children. If there’s anything I’ve tried to show here it is that a stay at home dad is not second best when it comes to parenting. That a single father is just as capable as a single mother in raising children. To suggest that two men, or two women (though I don’t think the outcry is anywhere near as strong), are any less capable as parents is an insult to any of us filling non-traditional roles as parents.

Recognizing same sex couples as equals is the civil rights issue of our day and I am embarrassed for America to see it take so long to make right.

I started to read up on cyber-bullying after the recent suicide of Phoebe Prince, with nine children charged for their contribution. I thought, how could schools miss this? Why didn’t the parents catch what was going on? It bothers me that such an emotional attack could be waged without anyone noticing. It has to do with how pervasive technology is in our children’s lives. The paths stretch much deeper than malicious posts on a child’s Facebook or MySpace page.

An often overlooked but more intimidating method of cyber-bullying is done through mobile phones. This is a device rarely out of a teenager’s reach. An attack can happen any time, anywhere, leaving the child feeling that there is no escape from the threats or taunts. The messages are held directly in the hand of the victim. Imagine if you received a text that said, “I can see you right now and you better run.”  Texting can be used to quickly spread rumors about your child to a wide audience. The opportunities for emotional intimidation are endless.

Aggressive texts can sometimes be the precursor to actual violence. Text harassment has become part of abusive relationships.  The fact that text messages can be kept private and hidden makes them particularly dangerous when it comes to dating violence. Demi Brae Cuccia, for instance, was murdered by her boyfriend the day after her sixteenth birthday. Her boyfriend had texted her with aggressive messages such as, “Wow… You no you love me and can’t live without me,” She was stabbed sixteen times that night.

With today’s more advanced phones like the iphone or the Droid, media like pornography or homicide photographs can be sent uninvited to your child.  Another type of harassment involves text wars, a group attack on a single victim, sending thousands of messages to the child’s phone. After seeing the phone bill angry parents may confront their child, not understanding that they are the victim of a bullying scheme.

The most important thing we can do is what we should be doing already. Talking to our children. We have to continue to try and make them comfortable sharing things that are often horribly embarrassing to them.

With author Carl Hiaasen’s new release, Star Island, I was reminded of his great ventures into young adult literature in recent years. I should have guessed he could be better than most authors at the crossover. Remove the strippers and guns from his adult novels and you have characters that easily stand up to the “so what?” scrutiny of a Jr. High kid.

Amazon.com Review

Roy Eberhardt is the new kid–again. This time around it’s Trace Middle School in humid Coconut Grove, Florida. But it’s still the same old routine: table by himself at lunch, no real friends, and thick-headed bullies like Dana Matherson pushing him around. But if it wasn’t for Dana Matherson mashing his face against the school bus window that one day, he might never have seen the tow-headed running boy. And if he had never seen the running boy, he might never have met tall, tough, bully-beating Beatrice. And if he had never met Beatrice, he might never have discovered the burrowing owls living in the lot on the corner of East Oriole Avenue. And if he had never discovered the owls, he probably would have missed out on the adventure of a lifetime. Apparently, bullies do serve a greater purpose in the scope of the universe. Because if it wasn’t for Dana Matherson… In his first novel for a younger audience, Carl Hiaasen (Basket Case, etc.) plunges readers right into the middle of an ecological mystery, made up of endangered miniature owls, the Mother Paula’s All-American Pancake House scheduled to be built over their burrows, and the owls’ unlikely allies–three middle school kids determined to beat the screwed-up adult system. Hiaasen’s tongue is firmly in cheek as he successfully cuts his slapstick sense of humor down to kid-size. Sure to be a hoot, er, hit with middle school mystery fans. (Ages 10 to 15) –Jennifer Hubert

Grind Show Book Review

As in his adult novels, Hiaasen pulls his stories from America’s favorite crazy state, Florida. In this eco-thriller for grades five and up, Mrs. Starch, an academically-feared biology teacher disappears during a field trip to the Everglades. Did the fabled black panther of the Black Vine Swamp get her, or was it the class delinquent that finally made good on his promise? And what’s going on with the shadowy oil men creeping through the swamps? (The ghosts of BP executives, perhaps.)  Nick and Marta seek to find the answers. As always Hiaasen’s characters are beautifully quirky, and he does an excellent job infusing them with emotion a young reader can respond to. His novel’s long-standing theme of secretive environmental menaces remains intact in the plot. As an adult reader, it leaves us rooting for the idealism of the young protagonists against the forces of abundant greed.

In case you haven’t noticed, there’s been a small explosion of fathers staying around home to help raise their children. The most common explanation of this revolution is from “ecoMOMics”–mom works because dad lost his job in a tight market, or the better pay of the mother allows dad to stay full time with the child. But there are other men out there that have been helping to raise their children historically longer than the trend we see today. These stay-at-home dads are often overlooked statistically and fly under the radar of other self-identified stay-at-home dads.

Military Dads

The deployment of soldiers to the warfronts of the world often leave one parent to provide for the needs of their children. More commonly, that parent is the father. Women make up fourteen percent of our active duty forces. In the Navy, more than half of the 21,000 married naval women are married to a civilian stay-at-home dad. That’s a remarkable statistic, making military spouses the largest population of stay at home dads by demographic.  Still, in the testosterone driven world of the military, many men choose to remain quiet about the role they play in their family.

Teachers
With three months off in the summer, male teachers have a great opportunity to save costs on daycare and get some full-time bonding with their kids.  Rarely identifying themselves as stay at home dads, at the playground they will simply introduce themselves as “teachers.”

Gay Fathers

When you see a dad at the park it doesn’t necessarily mean his wife is the breadwinner. Perhaps it’s because child’s the other dad is in some distant cubicle working for a paycheck. Parenting choices know no sexual orientation, and gay parents often agree they want one parent actively involved in their child’s upbringing. Because their partnerships are not legally recognized, (yet), there are no census statistics supporting their numbers.

Well, VH1′s Dad Camp delivered on its promise to allow mothers to decide if a yet unborn child’s father was worthy to be in their lives. In the season finale, fathers stood in front of pregnant mothers and sheepishly listened to the verdict. Almost all the mothers said, “He came to Dad Camp a boy and is leaving a man.” Boy, man, whatever. He is the child’s father and wants to be a part of their life! They certainly weren’t asking the mothers if they were ready to get pregnant or had a means to support themselves. To suggest that this decision is left solely to the mother is a disservice to their child. What an irresponsible television show that downplays the rights of fathers, whether they be good or bad.

That’s my opinion, but what do you think? Should a mother be given the right to banish a father from his child’s life?

Here’s a clip from the season finale of VH1′s Dad Camp:

Physician, heal thyself. We just returned from my wife’s family reunion, one that we helped plan. Her family is amazing and we had a great time in spite of Lake Casitas Recreation Area. I chose the location, thinking that after my years of park-rangering I could pick the perfect spot to cram 70 people together for five days. And it wouldn’t have been bad if certain uncontrollable factors hadn’t contributed to making a beautiful lake nearly unbearable. But uncontrollable doesn’t mean I shouldn’t have noticed the potential. The toilets in our area stayed clogged all weekend and a hip-hop party went on until two AM next to the great grandparents RV. So here I will reaffirm some of the steps to finding the perfect family campsite–advice I should have listened to myself.

Facilities: I’m a backpacker by nature. I can take a bath with baby wipes for a week. But kids layered in grape jelly and battered in mud brings it to a different level. You’ll want a place to hose them off. Lakes work well, though no soap is allowed.  Showers are a nice luxury.  A solar shower is another reasonable option for dry camping. Place a piece of old carpet underneath to keep your feet from getting muddy.

Maintenance: Does the staff come around and clean daily? Last thing you want is a clogged toilet while you are still trying to potty train your children. Watch the maintenance staff. Are the trash cans cleared regularly?  If a half full trash can isn’t changed for a clean bag, they’ll be overflowing on the weekends. Look at the empty sites for bottle caps or cigarette butts. The amount of  micro trash will give you a good idea of how they care for their campground.

Noise: Some campgrounds cater to families, others are sacrificed to partying. Know which one yours is. Management makes the decision whether to enforce quiet hours and speed limits.  Also be aware that just because it is quiet during the week doesn’t mean it will be on the weekend. I recommend talking to the maintenance staff, who will likely give you a more honest answer about the campground demeanor. The biggest problems arise almost exclusively at night, and directly correlate to alcohol consumption. Ask how many staff work on weekends, until what time, and if someone is accessible 24/7.

Despite Lake Casitas’s loss of 70 quiet campers for life, we had a great week catching up with the family. In the end I hope the company will be what we remember best.

NBC’s Today Show featured a nice story this morning on Stay-at-Home Dads and the changing role of fatherhood in the modern family.

Visit msnbc.com for breaking news, world news, and news about the economy

I’m going to be taking the next few days off from the blog. Not because I’ve run out of things to say, believe me. No, I’ll be heading to a big Family Reunion with my wife and the boys. Don’t despair, I’m certain that camping with three-year-olds will bring a slew of new writing material back, and not just ticks. In the meantime, take the chance to reminisce on some of my favorite posts.

Exercising in Futility

The Things Other Parents Never Tell You About Becoming a Dad

Learning to Tell a Great Joke