The Daily Okie

Open Letter to Dora

noreply@blogger.com (Christopher Mallow) — Fri, 30 Jul 2010 18:15:00 +0000

I've mentioned my feelings on kids' TV programming before, and while I am generally positive about it, there are a few shows I'm not that into. However, this post really sums my feelings up pretty well:

Dear Dora, We Need To Talk

Heidi sent me this a few days ago, and I've been meaning to post it here, and I just kept getting sidetracked from it.

The Geekiest Thing I Have Ever Seen

noreply@blogger.com (Christopher Mallow) — Fri, 30 Jul 2010 13:50:00 +0000

...and I've known lots of geeks, been a geek myself for quite a while, and have seen some truly geeky things. But THIS...

Mythbusters' Adam Savage...

Singing "I Will Survive"...

In the voice of Gollum from Lord of the Rings...

Accompanied by a guitar-playing Wookiee.

If THAT isn't geeky, I don't know what is. (Thanks to Chong, who of course attended the w00tstock 2.4 where this was done, which incidentally was during Comic-con...I said it was geeky.)

18 Months Today!

noreply@blogger.com (Christopher Mallow) — Wed, 28 Jul 2010 20:41:00 +0000

GO JULIANNA!!! YAAAAYYY!!!

That pic above is from early April, but it is really representative of her. She's growing incredibly quickly...super-mobile, fearless, loves the water, talks like crazy, ultra-willful. She's a firecracker...I can see she's going to be quite a handful as she gets older.

With pigtails...isn't she awesome?

She's a true Oklahoma girl...loves the water and loves to swim.

Most importantly, she loves spending time with her daddy.

Here It Is, The Real Deal

noreply@blogger.com (Christopher Mallow) — Tue, 27 Jul 2010 19:52:00 +0000

You've been to the concerts...you've heard the music. Now, here's the REAL THING, and you can own it yourself...an original REO Speed Wagon! Didn't think you'd ever see one, did you?

No, it's not mine...but this was a humorous addition to my day. Who knew that the group whose name has become synonymous with "power ballad", who became known for hauling heavy emotion, originated from something that had some power itself and hauled other things regularly? Hope you like it!

When You Need A Sentry Gun

noreply@blogger.com (Christopher Mallow) — Tue, 27 Jul 2010 13:51:00 +0000

You know, a sentry gun you can use in case you're concerned about aliens or something. Aliens that are killed by paintballs.

Try one of these out. And enjoy a full demo video below.

Good times.

Youtube Of The Day

noreply@blogger.com (Christopher Mallow) — Mon, 26 Jul 2010 20:18:00 +0000

First, there was Pride and Prejudice and Zombies. Now, there's this:

and this is MUCH better.

Blog Post Of The Day

noreply@blogger.com (Christopher Mallow) — Wed, 21 Jul 2010 12:59:00 +0000

Courtesy of my wonderful wife Heidi, here's a wonderful post that any parents out there will immediately identify with. It's titled, "Why Having A Toddler Is Like Being At A Frat Party." Enjoy!

Youtube Of The Day

noreply@blogger.com (Christopher Mallow) — Mon, 19 Jul 2010 18:50:00 +0000

Via Instapundit:

It's all about you and your Johnson, especially with your girl. Your kids, though...maybe not so much.

Big Step Forward for Katie

noreply@blogger.com (Christopher Mallow) — Mon, 19 Jul 2010 00:02:00 +0000

I have had the benefit of witnessing many Big Steps Forward for my children in the past year. Owen starting preschool (THAT was a big day) and memorizing the names of the planets (and even individual moons of Mars, Jupiter, and Saturn)...Julianna walking everywhere and saying actual words that communicate with us...Donovan's first full season of tackle football...Connor's emergence toward adolescence and all of the things that brings, such as a rabid interest in comic books and sci-fi that we can share.

This week, we had Katie here all week, so she had her own Big Step Forward. She's 15 now, and so we started driving lessons in earnest this week. We had a brief one during her time here last summer, but it was mostly focused on just learning steering, brakes, and gas. This time, we started working on a little more...and expanding her horizons and pushing the envelope a little bit. Here's her test from her lesson this past Tuesday night:

Then, for yesterday, I got two longer videos, as she did her little tests for me. Here's the first, with her completely on her own.

This last one is in-car, for the full experience.

Good job, Katie! We're proud of you! Keep working hard on it and you'll get to drive on your own some time soon.

Oklahoma Summer

noreply@blogger.com (Christopher Mallow) — Sat, 17 Jul 2010 17:18:00 +0000

Now THIS is the Oklahoma summer that I remember:

As you all recall, I've been on vacation. I've also been outside a little bit, taking care of some things in the garage and with the Bronco. And it has been HOT. Heidi has also been saying how hot it is, and she's been out more than I have.

But this little pic, courtesy of Channel 9's weather area, demonstrates what summer here is like. Hot, repeatedly hot, and with mild nights. This is the Oklahoma summer that I love so much...swimming weather during the day, cool weather to go out and have fun at night. When I was younger...but I won't get into that.

We're going to Pelican Bay water park in Edmond tomorrow, a slightly smaller version of White Water Bay. It will be nice.

When The System Doesn't Work

noreply@blogger.com (Christopher Mallow) — Wed, 14 Jul 2010 18:37:00 +0000

We'll all raised from birth to live within The System...at least, to a degree. Civilization is an ordered system. Systems increase productivity by simplifying otherwise-difficult tasks, or by organizing needed information for easy common access. Humanity is dependent on systems of varying kinds, and spends a great deal of time working on the design, maintenance, and improvement of the various systems it has created. Just consider for a moment, the wondrous variety and complexity of the systems we have created: food distribution systems, financial systems, credit systems, knowledge systems, educational systems, transportation systems, governmental systems.

And yet, all too often, even when well-designed and maintained, those systems fail miserably at what they're supposed to do. There are number of reasons for these failures. One is that systems are not only very good at increasing productivity of human beings, they are also excellent at encouraging their human users to quit thinking. A few years back, when we were having our deep financial difficulties, I ran into a myriad of problems getting my creditors to work with me, and it was nearly always because "the system won't let me do that". If I had a dollar for every time I heard that while I was trying to negotiate with them to get things under control...well, I wouldn't have needed to negotiate because I could've paid everything off. (It was funny how The System tells you that, if you have trouble, the first thing you do is contact your creditors to get them to work with you...even that part of The System failed me.) I even had one creditor, a company I had been dealing with repeatedly for over 5 years, tell me that they couldn't do anything for me because my account was not old enough (i.e., "my System won't let me help you.") In short, none of these people could get past their individual System...meaning that, even if I told them, "I'm going to be considering bankruptcy," it didn't phase them. In fact, none of them were able to turn their brains back on until I called them to notify them that I ACTUALLY HAD filed bankruptcy...and by then it was too late.

I didn't write this post to complain about those systems, though...that's all water under the bridge. I actually wrote this post to talk about the Bronco. You will recall that in my last post, I mentioned my struggles with how to move forward. I love the Bronco very much and don't want to part with it. However, in spite of its obvious utility for me, it is not an economical car. This isn't a huge issue, but I WOULD like to maybe save a little money, you know? As with any old car, I can either spend more money on preventative maintenance, not only oil changes and such but also the replacement of aged components, or I can wait for these various things to fail and replace them after the fact. And usually, those things are not small-ticket items when replacement time comes.

On Monday, though, the decision was made for me. We went to a dealership in the hopes of finding a suitable replacement. I even had one picked out. However, we've all heard the stories of how lending has dried up (unless you have pristine credit). I ran into this reality firsthand, as I was informed that while the dealer used to have a couple of banks that would lend to those in Chapter 13 plans such as myself, those banks are no longer doing so. So, with no suitable capacity to borrow, and with no interest in going to a "Buy Here, Pay Here" place to pick up a plain-jane sedan (why don't I just throw the towel in altogether and get another minivan?) or pick-up truck (if I were going for one of those, I wouldn't be dumping the Bronco anyway).

So I gave up and decided to just start fixing it. First order of business: the busted tailgate window. This is obviously a key, since a back window that won't close properly in the middle of an Oklahoma summer (when thunderstorms are still common) is not a good thing. So the focus of the past couple of days was replacing that bad motor. This is, interestingly enough, not a difficult job. First, you open the tailgate and remove the tailgate access cover, which is on the top/inward-facing portion of the tailgate. Then you pull the window up all the way so it's out of the way, making sure to prop it up with something so that its weight doesn't mess up the regulator or anything. Take out the three bolts holding the motor in place, unplug the motor, and remove. "Installation is reverse of removal" (a standard line from any number of auto-related shop manuals). The whole job would normally take 45-60 minutes, mostly because the access is so tight inside the tailgate itself. I looked online and found several suitable replacements but decided to go with Autozone because they actually had one in stock at a local store, meaning I wouldn't have to wait a couple of days and/or pay for shipping (The Internet is awesome for buying but if you want something quick the premiums are pretty high. So that means you're paying a lot, or you're waiting a week or more to get what you ordered. I hate waiting, and I hate paying extra, so I will almost always take a local option if it exists and isn't negated by extra cost. In this case, not only did Autozone have it in stock, but it was $50, the same price I found it online, so I would get it cheap AND quickly. Win-win.)

And here's where the Autozone System comes in. They specified a window motor to replace the one I had, and so that's what I got. I got home with it, though, to find that the orientation of the motor was not correct. The original motor bolts on and points to the passenger side of the vehicle, while the replacement I got wanted to bolt on but point to the passenger side. This would seem to be OK except that the center crossmember inside the tailgate was in the way. So even though the Autozone System said this is the correct replacement, it obviously was NOT, because it did not fit correctly. So, slightly frustrated, I did a little more research in Autozone's online system and found that the next part number up was an identical motor but with the opposite orientation, pointing the same way as the original. (It also, oddly enough, is exactly $4 more than the specified replacement, even though it is identical in every way except its orientation of installation.) So I drove back to Autozone, specified the replacement, swapped it out, paid the extra $4, and went home fully believing that all would be well.

Except, as you might guess from the tone of that last sentence, it wasn't well. The new motor was absolutely correct. BUT...the body of the part around the mounting holes and gear were plastic and slightly bigger and beefier than the original. Within the tight confines of the Bronco's tailgate, this meant that the part was correct, but did not fit in the area of the mounting bracket because it had...well, too much girth. Also, one of the three mounting holes was out of place, by about a quarter inch. At this point, I was getting angry, and mostly because Autozone's system failed in TWO ways: first, it specified a part of the incorrect fit, and second, it did that TWICE (incorrect orientation and incorrect size for mounting). This demonstrates a key issue that leads to the failure of many systems: the old adage we computer geeks know as "Garbage In, Garbage Out". The system will only report what it's told to report. The Autozone System was told that this part would correctly and successfully replace the tailgate window motor of a 1986 Ford Bronco. I had just proved that this was not the case.

So who told it that it would? Most likely, someone who simply went by some sort of Ford part number interchange list. You see, not all parts are unique to all cars; automakers don't like making different versions of things to do the same thing across different models. So they'll often use a successful design for a large number of models over several years. So the tailgate window motor in my Bronco is actually nearly identical to the electric window motors that Ford used in many of its vehicles in the same time, not just tailgates, but door windows as well. Also, third-party manufacturers will build parts for the automakers to use in their models, and they might sell the same part to several different automakers, who all use this part in their cars. An example of this was, when I had the 1998 Zebra Land Rover Discovery all those years ago, the fuel pump went out. A good friend of mine at the time, who had a 1997 Discovery and also was having fuel pumps issues, discovered that the fuel pump it used was identical to that used in a late-90s Chevy Impala. It was expensive to get one listed as a Land Rover part (around $300) but cheap to get the SAME PUMP listed as an Impala part (about $90). This is good news, because it means parts can be plentiful and thus easy to get when you need them. Try this same thing with an Opel or Peugeot or Fiat...you're walking into some VERY rough territory there. Parts interchange is a key thing for DIY guys like me...until someone screws it up, like they did here. This happens a lot, actually; I had a similar situation with the replacement flywheel I bought for the Mustang. The one I originally ordered from O'Reilly actually did not fit, in spite of the fact that their System said it was a correct part for my make and model. I ordered a different flywheel at Advance Auto Parts, and that one was correct. The newer system thus failed because the older interchange system failed by listing the part incorrectly for my application, and no "expert" ever bothered to verify in the real world if a part that is listed for a specific application would actually work in that specific application. In other words, the "experts" stopped thinking, because the System seemed to make thinking obsolete in that area. This is discouraging because interchange system failures thus complicate the budgeting and repair processes. If even the "experts" can't give you the right information because of their System, how are you going to get it right? Instead, since I'm the one who is actually thinking here, I end up solving my own problems outside of the System. Humanity may eventually die because it becomes too dependent on its Systems and ends up turning its brain off altogether. Is it any wonder why we still value "outside-the-box thinking" (i.e., thinking outside of the bounds of The System) so highly?

To demonstrate this final point, how did I solve my problem? Well, as I said, the body of the gear area on the motor were plastic...molded plastic, and a lot of it. So, I just took my air tools shaved off a substantial amount of plastic, taking care not to hit anything vital. I shaped it to as close to the original as the layout would allow, and drilled a new mounting hole in the correct place to fit the old mounting hole, and got it to go in correctly. And now the tailgate works even better than before. DIY WIN!!

Vacation, All I Ever Wanted

noreply@blogger.com (Christopher Mallow) — Mon, 12 Jul 2010 16:01:00 +0000

I'm on vacation. Not from the blog or anything specific...just vacation. After The last three weeks of long night of baseball games, and crazy-insane stuff going at work, and Julianna sick and teething, and Owen sick off and on, and all this after pushing myself really hard with baseball since the beginning of March....

I REALLY needed a vacation.

So I took one. I'm off of work and baseball (in fact, baseball season is pretty much over) and most things until next Monday. I'll still do a little blogging, because I don't consider this work...usually. But I'm definitely not going to be working. I'll do some stuff around the house, and I'll do stuff with the kids, and just generally take it easy.

Also, I might end up getting a new car to replace the Bronco. This last one isn't because I'm tired of it, which I'm not. It's mostly because the Bronco makes me nervous, and I really don't have the time, money, or patience to try to keep it going. The drivetrain is all fine; the engine still acts up from time to time but it runs and doesn't give me too much grief. But there ARE a lot of things that need to be replaced. For example, just about two weeks ago, just in time for the rain, the tailgate window decided to start acting up. As in, not going up and down reliably with the motor. This means I would need a replacement motor and drive gear. This isn't terribly expensive...less than $100 total with shipping and all...but I'd also need time to do the replacement myself, and it's somewhat time-consuming. Plus, I'd rather not spend the $100 if I can avoid it. However, obviously, one of the most important parts of the Bronco, the cargo area, is largely unavailable to me through the primary access because of this fault. So if I'm keeping the Bronco, this will need to be replaced. The Bronco also has needed a great deal of the weatherstripping replaced for quite some time as well. This would run about $300 for a full kit to replace it all. It also needs a new windshield, since that's cracked in two places and one of those cracks is non-trivial. Throw in another $185 for that. It needs shocks badly, and will need tires soon. The body is pretty rust-free for a truck of its vintage, but it is getting some bad rust at the bottom of the tailgate, so that needs to be replaced some time...and of course, body replacement also means painting. That's probably around $800 for that entire project. AND the tailgate window needs to be replaced because the tailgate window weatherstrips have become dry-hardened over time and have actually etched slightly into the glass. I have gotten a quote for this of nearly $300. Finally, there's 178,000 miles on this engine and transmission, so I have to keep that in the back of my mind.

Does all this bother me? Obviously it does, but not because there's so much that needs to be done. The problem for me is that we have three vehicles: the 2004 Ford Freestar minivan that is Heidi's primary driver, the Bronco, and the Mustang. I love the Bronco and would love to keep it. However, to keep it, I would need to be bringing in enough money to be able to fix all of these niggling issues. None of them is a show-stopper, but driving it around with these problems is troubling to me. Plus, we've been having a lot of issues with the minivan lately, and I don't want to be having to put tons of money into all three of our vehicles. Within the past two months alone, we have spent over $1600 on repairs between just the Bronco (new brakes) and the Freestar (PCV tube replacement, busted A/C partial repair). Considering that, if those issues had not come up, that amount of money would've gotten the Mustang back on the road with the rebuilt engine and new tires, having to constantly spend all this extra money on two vehicles that I like A LOT less than my Mustang is really frustrating to me, and has been a real bone of contention over the past few months. I have not liked working my butt off so we could have some extra money to do things we WANT to do, then having to spend all that extra on things we DON'T want to do, like maintain two busted vehicles. Yes, yes, I know..."Chris, you should be thankful you had that extra money to handle these issues as they came up." Yes, I am...but if I can simplify the car situation and get rid of something that does very well at sucking away all that extra money, I'll be much happier.

Besides, if I'm going to be spending money on a car, why not just get a good used car for under $10K, and effectively amortize out what I'd be spending on the Bronco, anyway? AND have the benefit of driving a vehicle that I don't have to worry nearly as much about?

So I'm looking at a nice small hatchback, something like a Ford Focus, a Hyundai Accent, a Honda Civic, a VW Golf, a Mazda3...that sort of thing. We'll see how it goes. Given our financial past, I might not be able to make it work right now, anyway...in which case this whole discussion is moot and I just have to swallow it all and deal with it. (It certainly wouldn't be the first time in the past few years that I've had to just deal with what life has given me, with no short-term hope of improvement. Heidi and I are kind of getting used to that, to be honest.)

So wish me luck! Of course, when the situation works itself out, there will be a nice blog post about it.

What, Age?

noreply@blogger.com (Christopher Mallow) — Mon, 28 Jun 2010 02:39:00 +0000

I found an interesting contrast in the ideas of "adults" regarding the rights, abilities, and developmental levels of "children". (I am using quotes on both of those words for a very specific reason, as you will see shortly.) First, one of the car blogs I read regularly, The Truth About Cars, had a post regarding the legal driving age:

Ask The Best And Brightest: Driving Age At 16?

Don't quote me statistics...it is conventional wisdom that driving is a relatively high-risk activity for people of any age, and that it is more high-risk for teen drivers. This page claims that 1 in 3 deaths of teenagers is motor-vehicle-related, which translates to 11 teenagers dying in car wrecks every day. Now, I don't know about you, but I took basics statistics in college, and so when I am presented with any sort of statistic on anything, I usually try to find out if the statistic is meaningfully used in the discussion at hand. I was going to write a long, detailed review of the numbers, doing a little of my own math against the US population at large, to see if the stats I presented above were meaningful. (Short answer: they are, sort of...the fatality rate is slightly greater for the teen population against the population at large, but not to an alarming degree. Also notice that the above stats don't specify how many teens die who aren't driving or when a "qualified" adult is driving. You can do the math yourself: just calculate the percentage of motor-vehicle-related teen fatalities against the total teen population, then figure the percentage of all US motor-vehicle-related fatalities against the entire US population. All the demographic stats are easy to find.)

The commenters to the post above mention all sorts of things to bolster their argument that 16-year-olds aren't ready to drive, saying they don't have the mental development yet, and of course, the standard argument of immaturity. I take issue with these comments, considering that teens have been depended on by their families for years in doing such complex things as driving tractors, planting and harvesting, and other difficult and strenuous tasks. One hundred years ago, a boy was expected to do a man's work at 14 or 15, and was equal to the task. Teens were often married and having kids just as early (we'll get back to this key point later).

Here's how I see it. I started "driving" when I was about 7, when Grandpa let me drive his golf cart around his yard. He and Grandma lived on just over an acre, so they had plenty of room for me to drive it around. Not too long after, I was chauffeuring him around the golf course during his daily morning round during my school vacations, with him giving me important tips on how to keep the thing under control. (His most important lesson was the one where he taught me not to use my left foot on the brake while my right foot was on the gas. Unless you're a racer, you'll almost never need to do that.) Mom and Dad got me my own motor scooter when I was about 10, and I drove it around our neighborhood quite a bit (as you might imagine, riding that thing was a favorite pastime of mine). So by the time I actually got behind the wheel of a full-size motor vehicle, I already had several years of basic driving experience under my belt. I took drivers' ed the summer between my sophomore and junior years, right after I had gotten my learner's permit. (The most important lessons I learned in drivers' ed? 1. Always think ahead, and 2. it's good to actually look over your shoulder to check your blind spot, rather than just using your mirrors.) Mom and Dad let me drive somewhat regularly with them, just around town near our house. On my 16th birthday just a few months later, Dad called me in at school, and as soon as I was up and around, he took me straight to the testing station. I already had my permit, so I didn't have to take the written exam; I just got in line straightaway for my driving test. I took it, and I passed with a 78%. I'm still quite proud that I passed on my first try. I had some minor fender-benders in parking lots but I never did anything stupid when I drove. We didn't have cell phones, and so it actually was much easier to stay focused on driving than it is today, in my opinion. Even when I had friends in the car with me, I managed to stay focused on driving.

The point being, I didn't get killed by driving. None of my friends got killed by driving. I went to high school with 549 other people in my class alone, and at least that many in each of the classes around me, and I knew NO ONE who was killed in a car wreck. There were lots of kids just like me; they were either riding motorcycles or go-karts, or driving golf carts, or doing other kinds of things to get basic driving skills. When the time came, they weren't totally unprepared for the driving experience. In my entire life, I've only known one family personally who lost a teen in a wreck, and the mom was the one driving; she went into a skid and lost control during a strong thunderstorm and crossed the median into oncoming traffic. I know of another instance here locally, the daughter of a friend of my cousin, whose teenager was killed in a wreck out in Tuttle. The wreck was not their fault. So for me, personal experience and knowledge does not bear out the stats above.

I have found that teens often will rise (or fall) to the expectations they are given, and to the level of guidance they are provided. I took Katie out for her first driving lesson last summer. Normally, I would not have thought about this, as she can be very flighty and non-serious. But she was deeply engaged in our lesson, took it very seriously, and worked very hard to do as she was instructed. In short, at 14, she showed great maturity and made me proud (and showed good skills by the time we were done). This would indicate to me that she would take it sufficiently seriously, and besides, no teenager is going to learn to drive except by actually driving. Driving is like anything else; until you're behind the wheel, you really can't get the experience.

Are there kids who will get killed in car wrecks? Sure. There are people or every age who are careless or stupid, and they usually pay for their carelessness or stupidity eventually. Let's face it; you can ratchet up the driving age, but with stuff on TV like Jackass and other shows of that ilk, do you seriously think the stupid and careless teenagers will be able to avoid serious injury and/or death simply because they're not driving?

To add an ironic note to this discussion, and to reconnect to something I said earlier, I post this link:

Condoms for first graders

You might already have heard of this. I find this ridiculous, but in light of the discussion we're having, it raises an important question: we figure that elementary-school kids will have enough knowledge, understanding, maturity, and "development" to handle the responsibility of human reproduction, but we don't trust teens to drive until they're 18 (or older)? How screwed up are our priorities here?

What do you think? Are we really being stupid? Or am I off-base with all of this?

Gentlemen, We Can Rebuild Him...

noreply@blogger.com (Christopher Mallow) — Fri, 25 Jun 2010 15:17:00 +0000

"We have the technology. Better...faster...stronger."

Amputee cat gets bionic feet

Now, if I had the video creation and editing skills, I'd make a hilarious video to post on Youtube of this cat running 60mph on a treadmill, jumping a 12-foot fence in a single bound, and catching and gobbling up mice at superspeed. Instead, the best I can do is rip off the obvious quote above. I hope you enjoyed the story, anyway.

Wrong Wrong Wrong Wrong WRONG!!!

noreply@blogger.com (Christopher Mallow) — Thu, 24 Jun 2010 17:56:00 +0000

You all know I'm a big Mustang fan. I'm the kind of guy who laughs when some guy buys a Mustang of any vintage and drops in a Chevy 350* or something stupid like that. (I'm a dance-with-the-one-who-brung-ya kind of guy.)

So when I see something like this, I tend to react as exhibited by the title of this post.

That's just wrong. Truly, deeply wrong.

* I actually saw one of these for sale on Craigslist locally a while back, and watched with grim amusement as it never sold, despite being posted and reposted for several months.

The World What?

noreply@blogger.com (Christopher Mallow) — Fri, 11 Jun 2010 18:19:00 +0000

The World Cup has started, and from ESPN's front page, you'd think it was the talk of the country.

Um....well.........not really, but thanks for trying.

As a further indicator the ESPN is no longer a true sports news outlet, and is merely doing whatever it can possibly do to further its own network aims, it is super-hyping all the upcoming games. Which, incidentally, are all on ESPN and its assorted 2nd-tier and 3rd-tier channels. Ditto for CBS Sportsline, which has a partnership with Univision to show a bunch of World Cup games.

As an official, I live in the sports world, every day. The people I work with generally eat, sleep, and breathe sports. They talk about sports all the time. I've talked about the conference realignment stuff, and about baseball, and about basketball (even though they did most of the talking there), and even some about car racing. No one has mentioned soccer, though, not even in passing. In fact, I would argue that the best sports news venues are the ones such as Fox Sports and Sporting News, which continue to provide a very balanced spread of stories across the entire American sports landscape.

Soccer might be growing in the US, though I would argue this is largely because of the burgeoning immigrant (legal and otherwise) population we have here, rather than because Americans are taking new interest in the sport. I would argue that "American exceptionalism" also extends into sports; we have plenty of our own, thank you very much, and don't really need any of yours. In fact, I saw one of the most ludicrous things I've ever read, in an article from (IIRC) the Washington Post regarding America's bid to host another World Cup in a few years: "America needs the World Cup a lot more than the World Cup needs America." What a foolish thing to say, considering America doesn't really "need" the World Cup at all.

Don't try to make this out to be more than it really is, people. I would be interested to hear from anyone on this...are you really that interested? Is it worth taking valuable front-page space from American sports for something that maybe 20% of Americans care about? Or do you see it the same way I do, just another blip that means more to the rest of the world than it does to us?

How Do You Like Me Now?

noreply@blogger.com (Christopher Mallow) — Fri, 11 Jun 2010 05:50:00 +0000

So....what do you think of the new look? Blogger finally got around to putting together a decent blog template designer in the Dashboard. I like it very much. I was able to quickly put together a new template that I like. You might notice a few other changes over the next week or two as I tweak the new look and experiment some with the designer. So keep your eyes peeled!

I've Been Waiting A Long Time

noreply@blogger.com (Christopher Mallow) — Thu, 10 Jun 2010 14:29:00 +0000

In 1991, I was accepted to the University of Chicago, and started there a mere 3 days after my 18th birthday. Chicago is a great town, especially for sports, and I immediately fell in love with the Chicago Blackhawks. I followed them closely the entire year, even going to a couple of games ($20 standing-room-only tickets at the old Chicago Stadium can never be underestimated). I spent many nights putting off homework so I could listen to the game on the radio. In the '91-'92 season, the 'Hawks were stocked with greats like Jeremy Roenick, Ed Belfour, Chris Chelios, Steve Larmer, and a rookie goaltender named Dominik Hasek. They dominated in the first rounds of the playoffs, winning 11 straight playoff games (a record at the time).

They then promptly got swept in the Finals by the Mario Lemieux/Jaromir Jagr-led Pittsburgh Penguins. And they had not been back to the finals since.

Until this year. The 'Hawks, after 15 years of languishing under the policies of owner William "Dollar Bill" Wirtz, were finally "liberated" by his unfortunate passing in September 2007. (As a testament to Wirtz's tight-fisted ways, many Blackhawks fans were happy to see him go, even in such a final way.) With a few good free agents, but mostly through some very savvy draft picks and farm-grown players, the 'Hawks finally emerged this season.

And now, after all this time, the Blackhawks have WON THE STANLEY CUP!!! It's been a long time coming.

GO HAWKS!

Anger RISING

noreply@blogger.com (Christopher Mallow) — Tue, 08 Jun 2010 18:05:00 +0000

What spoiled pieces of S***! And there are a lot of people like this in Boulder. Fortunately for the rest of us, though, most of them are smart enough to not procreate, knowing up-front that having children really ruins the hip Boulder "Peter Pan" lifestyle. Read the whole article:

Mother Admits Concerns Of Autism Were Motive In Son's Slaying

It is difficult for me to understand how we continue to let people like this exist. And yet, while conviction seems quite likely, they're not seeking the death penalty, so this "woman" will live off the public teat at an effective rate of nearly $50,000 per year. Why waste the money?

And sadly...there are those who will argue that this would've been a good case for abortion. How about this being a good case of either a) a stupid, shallow couple thinking further ahead, or b) manning up and taking the consequences of your choices? For this poor excuse for a human being, it will be the latter...though by force of law, unfortunately for the rest of us.

Of course, all this comes far too late for poor little Rylan, who by all appearances, never really had a chance to be wanted or loved.

Starting the Month of Hell

noreply@blogger.com (Christopher Mallow) — Wed, 02 Jun 2010 03:21:00 +0000

June is an important month for an amateur umpire at the high school level. We make more per game than at any other time (unless you work all varsity, which is only possible for the long-term guys). And it's also the last sport you're going to get to call until you get to football (or fall baseball); baseball pretty much winds down by July 4th. So you gotta get it in while you can.

And boy howdy, I'm doing just that. Tonight starts a 12-day run of games. Not only is it 12 straight days of games, but likely it will be 15 straight days (I'm missing a Sunday but can fill that up with youth league). I'm only taking June 16th off because it's my anniversary, and I REALLY like being married to Heidi and wouldn't want to do anything really bone-headed...like work games on my anniversary. After that, it's 13 working dates in 15 days...and it could also become 15 out of 15, since I might actually be able to work in some last-minute games here and there. That means I could end up working 30 of the next 31 days, starting tonight.

Whew...........

On second thought, I'll be glad baseball wraps up at the end of the month. I'll be ready for a vacation.

---------------------

On an interesting side note, we ran a copperhead off the field at Southmoore tonight. That's a first for me. He wasn't very happy, and we had to work harder to keep the players back than we did to chase him off the field. I didn't want to mention what he was until he was gone, because the last thing we needed was a bunch of excited kids around an aggressive venomous snake.

That's one of the great things about doing this...there's a lot of the same-old same-old, but there's also a lot of new and interesting things that happen that you probably wouldn't run into anywhere else.

RUSTLERS!! (Get a rope)

noreply@blogger.com (Christopher Mallow) — Tue, 01 Jun 2010 20:55:00 +0000

I found this interesting because it seems so anachronistic. Read the story:

Oklahoma agency investigating cattle thefts

And tell me you don't see John Wayne riding around the bend, pulling out his six-shooter to drive off some bad guys with running irons. I guess it still happens. (Personally, I'll be on the lookout for a train robbery story, or that wild Indian uprising.)

Still Want an iPad?

noreply@blogger.com (Christopher Mallow) — Thu, 27 May 2010 14:02:00 +0000

Everyone worships Apple. Yes, there are holdouts like myself, but for the most part, Apple has become what it parodied in the famous 1984 commercial: Apple has become The Man, the guy on the screen with all the little sycophantic peons listening enraptured (or lobotomized, depending on your point of view). Don't believe me? Well, if the stupid garbage with Apple's controls on the App Store aren't enough for you, and if today's revelation that Apple has overtaken Microsoft as "top tech company" doesn't convince you, try this:

Undercover Report From Foxconn's Hell Factory (via Gizmodo)

Foxconn is the company that actually manufactures iCrap for Apple. Interestingly, they've had quite a spate of suicides among their workers recently...so many, in fact, that Chinese newspapers decided to look into it. We're firmly on Nike territory now, aren't we?

Still ready to buy that iPad?

The Right Stuff

noreply@blogger.com (Christopher Mallow) — Sun, 23 May 2010 23:06:00 +0000

Years ago, Tom Wolfe wrote a book about the first US astronauts and what it was that made them want to take these incredible risks and do these dangerous things. This post's title is the same title he used, for good reason. I was thinking about what it takes to make a good sports official. I've linked to pages that talk about what makes a good official, and I've met lots of guys in officiating who really are good officials...and many who definitely are not. There's truth in all of these pages, and some intangible things that aren't directly mentioned, as well.

Yes, you have to have a very thick skin. You have to be able to handle people calmly and well, and you have to have good judgment. You have to be able to apply rules quickly, consistently, and (most importantly) correctly. You have to take time to learn the rules and continue studying them. You have to appear confident and be able to sell your abilities, in every way possible. You have to handle criticism but also know and understand when the criticism is legitimate, as when it comes from fellow officials you know and trust, as compared to when it comes from mere fans (who, frankly, don't usually know what they're talking about). You learn very early in officiating that "perception is reality" and that one truth plays a part in nearly everything you do in your duties as an official. You can also use that to your advantage, and I do. I work hard to keep my appearance neat, clean, and professional for any games I work. Clean-shaven face, sweat-stain-free uniform and hat, clean and polished (if possible) shoes, well-maintained quality equipment, good communication, on-time arrival for my scheduled games, hustling and vigorous activity on the field, clear calls and rulings that are timely but not so quick that it appears I'm guessing or not thinking, all of these factor in to how I appear to the people involved. It's hard work, but for some people, it comes very easily. Those people have The Right Stuff.

I know guys who are super-sharp on the rules, and who know mechanics forward and backward...but are still terrible officials, because even with all that incredible knowledge, they just don't do the critical thing to be a good official. They don't keep their stuff in good shape, so they don't look good. Their timing is too quick on their calls, so they look like they're not thinking about what they're doing (even if they're right). They don't handle arguments and confrontations properly, being too hot-headed. They don't communicate their rulings well, so they appear to be making things up as they go. The most common failing of otherwise "good" officials is what I would call "excessive legalism," meaning they will call correct rules in incorrect situations, forgetting that the spirit of the rules is to provide fair and equal play, so that a team or player can't get an unsportsmanlike advantage of his/their opponent. They might not have all of these failings, or even more than one. Usually, though, one of these failings is more than enough, and even the best officials sometimes struggle with some of these. Those who can't overcome these failings, though, do NOT have The Right Stuff.

And that's the crux of this. I was originally going to just talk about what makes a good official, mostly because it interests me and because I like thinking and talking about it. But as I was putting the post together in my head, I realized that it merely touched on the edge of a much bigger picture, and a key failing in our society today, and especially in the educational section of our society. Bear with me while I explain.

Every profession has a Right Stuff to it, characteristics about it that mesh well with an individual's personal traits, habits, skills, and talents. I have spoken before about how I am good at taking fundamental rules and applying them consistently, and that this makes me good at technical and mechanical work...and officiating, as it happens. I'm also able to project confidence (even when I don't always feel confident). Heidi is wonderful at caring for children; she's good at it because she has the patience, thoughtfulness, creativity, and quick thinking that is key in dealing with small children. The thing is, unless they have some sort of mental deficiency, everyone has a set of innate abilities, aptitudes, and character traits, which translate over time into skills...and usually, into interests. This is their "Right Stuff." The astronauts' "Right Stuff" was adventurousness, courage, incredible piloting skill, meticulousness, physical stamina, and coolness under fire. This made them perfect for what was needed in humanity's initial drive into the great unknown of outer space.

Every job or profession has special "Right Stuff" requirements, and that every person has their own "Right Stuff." The key, though, is matching people's "Right Stuff" with jobs' "Right Stuff". This is sort of implicit, understood knowledge in human civilization. People are happiest when they're doing something they like and/or that they're good at. When people are happy with their work, they work harder and are more productive. More productive workers grow business, which is good for the economy and good for everyone. Everyone feels successful and fulfilled, and this makes everyone happier. Conversely, when people are doing something they are not good at, or don't enjoy, or both, they're not happy. Unhappy workers are less productive, which creates inefficiency and drags down their organization or endeavor. They also drive away customers, which hurts the business. Enough of this drags on the economy, further increasing unhappiness.

Sure, these are generalizations. I have met people that are really good at something, yet can't stand doing it. For example, an old friend was actually a very good gold and platinum smith, which you would expect to be a very lucrative profession. He really didn't enjoy doing it, though, and now works as a teacher at a local charter school. Generally, though, people enjoy doing things they're good at, and vice versa; and they're unhappy doing things they're not good at, and vice versa. So, you'd think it would behoove us as a civilized race to work very hard at making sure what people do well (and thus, what they usually enjoy doing) mesh with what needs to be done. Yet there are millions of people who toil in jobs they are not good at, or hate, or both, leading to horrible inefficiencies and terribly unhappy human beings.

As a society, and particularly in our educational system, we are not good at helping people find what their "Right Stuff" is. Some school systems, mostly notably Germany's (and there may be others of which I am not aware), actually make an effort to steer children toward things they appear better suited for. However, most Western-style education focuses on the idyllic but woefully outdated ideal of the "well-rounded person". So we waste time throwing 20 different subjects at students through the course of their entire scholastic career, and we give them very little guidance toward where their aptitudes really are. We also spend a great deal of time on the meme "you can do anything you want, if you just set your mind to it" and "you can be whatever you want to be!" These are true, but there's also a tremendous amount of willpower involved (the "if you just set your mind to it" part), and most kids don't have the willpower to see that through. (Many adults don't either, for that matter.) To go back to my own situation, I was nearly 30 before I realized what my personal meta-strengths were, and by then, I was pretty much set on my life's road. I think that's too long, especially since these aspects of my personality undoubtedly showed themselves much earlier on in my life, and if someone had helped me see them, I'd probably be even more successful today than I am. As it was, I had a family I was responsible for and couldn't have easily changed course for something that suited me better, if I had made bad choices earlier on.

I'm not saying that, if we see a kid is good in math, that we ditch history or art or any other subjects; I'm simply saying that we make sure the kid gets all the math he can stand. He'll KNOW he's good at math, and he'll enjoy it (a kid ENJOYING school? What a concept!). Then, knowing he's good in math, he'll probably take an interest in science, too, so we give him broader exposure to that, as well. That will lead to good things. If a kid's talents are toward social studies, send them that way. If it's toward creative works like art or music, provide them guidance there. If the child shows intangible strengths like leadership or organization or meticulousness, we should make note of that, like a "permanent record". It's incumbent on teachers and parents to work together to see what a child's personality and physical talents are, and steer them toward activities and goals that are in line with those talents. As time goes on, the child will see his personality strengths, his intellectual strengths, and his physical strengths, and will be able go down a road that takes the most advantage of those. They will find their own "Right Stuff". He'll still get other subjects to provide context to his primary abilities, but they would be greatly de-emphasized as his education progresses.

So where does that lead? Well, when the kid is older, maybe about to hit high school, he'll have a better idea of what he's capable of. He will still be able to take any classes he feels like, but the requirements will be that he continues down a path that will make him happiest while maximizing his potential productivity once he enters society as an adult. He can look at college prep, if that's where things point. Or he can get into a skilled trade, shop classes or the like. Or he can focus on something more directly business-oriented, like management or sales. Or he can prepare for more classical artistic training for dance or music or painting. The point being, the synergy created all around for him would only be positive and he'd have a great idea of where he could be heading. And besides, once he's an adult, he could still embark on some other path; that's what college is for, after all. We would never be dictating to anyone what they SHOULD be doing. However, if he goes it alone, on his own, he'll still have a MUCH better understanding of where his strengths and weaknesses are, and that will help him connect with a career that will suit him much better. Every set of characteristics should lead an individual toward several potential career opportunities, and if they have a better understanding of themselves, they can make better decisions that are more likely to make them happy, and to be productive in society.

This system would not remove all troublesome folks from society, but it would work to reduce the risks of kids who don't receive guidance, never find what they're really good at (or if they do, no guidance on how to make it work for them), and end up wandering or appearing lazy or feckless. There will always be people who just aren't suited for work of any kind in spite of their abilities and talents, and we'll make do with them the best we can, as we already do. But I bet we'd have a lot fewer of those people.

Kids do love to learn, if you give them the right environment and the right incentives. I'm just afraid that we put too much emphasis on kids getting good grades in everything, when we should probably just make sure they get good grades in the stuff that matches well with their "Right Stuff". High schools today do provide "guidance counselors" but they're not taken nearly as seriously as they should be, and by the time most students get to high school and actually talk to a guidance counselor, they still have no idea who they really are. Sometimes, with the truly amazing people like Tiger Woods or Steven Hawking, they are able to follow a road that maximizes their talents to their maximum potential. I think we could do better to help those people find and connect with their best parts.

I'll probably never live to see a system like this. But I think it would work much better than our gigantic mish-mash we have today.

On Motorcycles

noreply@blogger.com (Christopher Mallow) — Fri, 21 May 2010 22:46:00 +0000

I've been thinking about motorcycles quite a bit lately. Not because I want one...though getting a decent one down the road wouldn't be out of the question...but rather because I see and hear them and about them every day.

We've got lots of riders here in Oklahoma. This isn't unusual; there are lots of riders everywhere these days. Unfortunately, most of them ride those ridiculous abominations that you hear long before actually see them. That always make it look like the rider is feckless white-trash loser, pining for something he doesn't have and never had. That sound awful, even when they aren't destroying your eardrums. (In fact, a close acquaintance of mine told me that the first thing you do to a new Harley is remove the muffler.) Or, they drive one of those giant things that makes you wonder why they didn't just buy a Lincoln Town Car and drive with the windows down...especially when they're pulling a small trailer behind their bike. Or get a used Miata or something.

I can respect riders...they love the feel of the wind, the rumble of the bike, the thrill of the open road. I prefer to get those things in a nice convertible, but I've ridden before, myself, and I know what that feeling is and why it's so addicting. However, I wish these folks would consider the image they portray about themselves. For example, what does it say about you when you wear the hilarious-but-tactless "If you can read this, the bitch fell off" T-shirt from Harley? Or the riding clothes that are way too tight for your (and your "bitch's") 275-pound physique? Or when you adorn your ride and yourself with so much fringe, you look like a party favor as you cruise down the highway? Or when it's obvious that you have washed neither your bike nor your riding gear in several months. I know, I know, there's no accounting for taste...but I would argue that Harleys are yet another embodiment of the "screw you, it's all about me" syndrome that has been punching this country in the kidney since the mid-1960s.

The same goes for the actual driving habits of a lot of riders. Harley riders, while they often look ridiculous, are at least usually somewhat courteous in my experience. They're smart riders, paying attention and staying out of your way...normally. There are others, though, for whom the idea of being a smart driver is wholly foreign, which is doubly dangerous when you consider that you have almost no protection while riding a motorcycle. These are the guys who ride the crotch-rockets and insist on popping wheelies in the middle of rush-hour traffic. I used to see these morons all the time in the HOV lanes right next to heavy traffic on the freeways of Denver. Then there are the ones who will exploit their bike's better agility and acceleration to dangerously weave through 3-foot gaps between cars while traveling 70 mph. All it takes is one miscalculation, and you're roadkill.

Obviously, these things are not true for all riders, or even for all Harley or crotch-rocket riders. I know guys who drive Harleys, and actually look good doing it (even if looking is all I have after being made temporarily deaf by them). Heidi keeps telling me she wants a Harley, and I know she'll be a careful and considerate rider when that day comes. I don't know personally any guys who drive crotch-rockets, but I'm sure there are smart, careful ones out there somewhere.

So what about my ride? I did say earlier on that I'd be OK with getting a motorcycle in the future. Well, I do have a few picked out for if/when the time comes. I prefer rides that look sleek and modern without being racy, have power without being obnoxious, and are comfortable without making me look elderly. Such bikes do exist, although you'd never know it, as this combination seems to be the least-favored street ride among the riding community (who all seem to prefer Harleys/Harley clones, crotch-rockets, or Gold Wings). In the parlance of riders, what I prefer is called the "Sport Touring" bike. So here's my quick list:

1. Honda ST1300 -- Smooth and fairly powerful. They have a sporty look without making it look like I'm on the track. Probably the most affordable of the lot, and it's a Honda so you know the engineering is solid.
2. BMW R1200RT -- A sharp sport-touring bike. A BMW. What more could you ask for?
3. Triumph Sprint ST (or the upcoming 2011 Sprint GT) -- The styling on this is very close to the sport bike line for me. However, Triumph makes great bikes, and from what I've seen online, this one is universally highly-rated as a sport-touring ride.

Most importantly, all of these are fairly QUIET. I much prefer quiet bikes while riding; I consider it rude to enforce my lifestyle decisions and hobbies upon others in yet another blatant way. (Can I get an "amen" from those of you who've been awakened at 10:30pm by the motorcycle-enthusiast-next-door?) So there you have it. I might not ever have one, but if I do, these are what I'm going with.

We'll Keep You Advised...

noreply@blogger.com (Christopher Mallow) — Thu, 20 May 2010 13:59:00 +0000

I had forgotten what it's like around here during tornado season. Last year's tornado season was relatively mild, but so far, this year's has had a ton of activity. Lots of things remind me of home, and reinforce my connection to this place, and as odd as it might sound to a non-Okie, all this tornado activity does. Going out to watch the storms...listening to the weather radio and the strangely-comforting robotic voice of the National Weather Service...following all the storm coverage with the local weathermen, through their preemption of all types of programming. Oh yes...when we have storms here, if you like network TV, you don't get to see anything except storm coverage. As Brian over at Rockwood pointed out last week, it's like true reality TV, only much more serious. An Okie's relationship to the weather this time of year is very much love/hate, just another part of our identity as born-and-bred Oklahomans. We even joke about it.

Plus, weather is...you know, interesting. It provides some redirection from all the other junk going on. And since weather is such a huge part of our lives here in the spring and early summer in Oklahoma, and since we've got incredible meteorologists here who convey good information to us, most Okies can actually talk fairly intelligently about weather as it's going on. Even Heidi is getting into it, and she's not much of a bad-weather person. Me, I love storms, and always have. But Heidi is still adjusting.On the other hand, Donovan, who is normally terrified of storms, got excited (in a good way) and spent nearly two hours watching the tornado coverage on TV the other night. He knows what a wall cloud is by sight now. He asks me engaging questions about it. We haven't yet gotten to the point of watching Twister with him, but slowly, he is converting to his new home. I hope that trend continues.