Daily Vowel Movements

Why aren't you answering me?

2015-06-26T07:32:00.001+10:00

I'm not bossy, I just know what you should be doing.

2015-05-06T05:00:00.000+10:00

How to keep an idiot busy for nearly a minute

2015-05-02T22:37:00.002+10:00

Today has been cancelled. Go back to bed.

2015-05-02T05:00:00.000+10:00

Do you speak 'idiot'?

2015-04-07T21:19:00.000+10:00

Diaper loading, please wait ...

2015-04-04T21:18:00.000+11:00

This is 'cool camping'

2015-03-31T21:17:00.000+11:00

The real definition of feet

2015-03-28T21:17:00.002+11:00

Admit it.

2015-03-19T19:52:00.000+11:00

One of the best games of your childhood, was not letting the balloon touch the floor

Baby dressing for Dad

2015-03-15T19:51:00.000+11:00

Behold the Texting Mitt

2015-03-12T19:50:00.002+11:00

And so it has come to this

The 13 funniest tweets about #TheDress

2015-02-28T11:07:00.001+11:00

In case you have been living under a rock, or you don't have the Internet, which probably means you wouldn't be reading this, a photo of a dress has been breaking all social media records and caused an Internet uproar - some are even claiming it has "broke the Internet", more than Kim Kardashian ever could.

So, if you are a looking for an explanation of what #theDress is, or why it is the only thing people are talking about, then you have come to the wrong place. I am not going to post anything about that, nor offer any explanation of the phenomenon, partly, or perhaps mainly, because I have no idea. Nor am I going to get preachy about how we should be using the Internet for something more constructive, which reminds me of this quote and a craze from a few years ago:

"Your cell phone has more computing power than all of NASA in 1969. NASA launched a man to the moon. We launched a bird into pigs."

I am not going to do any of these things because I would rather continue the stupidity and post the funniest tweets from all over the world in response to #theDress debacle, or as some are calling it #dressgate.

So here they are - the funniest tweets about #theDress:

Diaper loading, please wait ...

2015-02-17T09:50:00.002+11:00

Acupuncture - I just don't get it

2015-02-12T21:36:00.001+11:00

Here is the easiest way to work out crosswords

2015-02-03T09:23:00.001+11:00

When your grandma tells your mum to leave you alone

2015-02-02T23:21:00.000+11:00

Is this the laziest cat in the world?

2015-02-01T23:10:00.001+11:00

This lazy cat uses his paw to drink water while laying down.

Effective - Yes

Original - Yes

Lazy - Yes

NO MORE's Official Super Bowl Ad: 60 Second

2015-01-28T20:26:00.001+11:00

Powerful ad to be aired at this year's Super Bowl.

Watch it. Please.

A social media emergency!

2015-01-28T20:19:00.003+11:00

An artist paints what he sees

2015-01-26T22:50:00.000+11:00

The Hokey Pokey Clinic - a place to turn yourself around

2015-01-25T08:29:00.001+11:00

Did you know that baby wombats look like kung fu masters?

2015-01-19T07:59:00.001+11:00

via

Amazing Ceiling Art in smoking room

2015-01-12T07:41:00.000+11:00

I find your lack of "Faith" disturbing

2015-01-10T19:57:00.002+11:00

Special Delivery - New Year's Package

2015-01-09T22:27:00.000+11:00

Dear all,

For the last 9 months or so, my wife and I, have been waiting on a special delivery to arrive.

While I won’t bore you with all the details of the pick up, which ended up being quite an ordeal, you can stop worrying now – it was delivered safely.

It all started while we were watching the New Year’s Eve fireworks display, when the parcel distribution company began sending my wife delivery status notifications. They came every 15 minutes for the entire night, until at 8am, they became so annoying that we decided to go to the parcel depot to sort things out properly.

In order to stretch (no pun intended) this woeful metaphor out a bit more, we are pleased to announce the arrival of a huge package weighing just over 10 pounds (4.6 kilograms) named Hannah Elizabeth. While we got away without having to pay any postage and handling fees and luckily escaped the public holiday surcharge, we had to wait the entire day before she arrived at 9:32pm on 1 January 2015.

The package was marked ‘Fragile’, ‘Handle with care’, and “Made in Japan”, given we originally placed the order while we were on three months long service leave in Tokyo at the start of 2014. In fact we partly chose the name because it means flower in Japanese, (only after my suggestion of naming her after a small miniature tree was vetoed immediately - I still think Bonsai as a first name has a nice ring to it).

The name also means grace, mercy, or according to Wikipedia “God’s given gift to the world” – and to Him we are truly thankful.

(In case you are worried, we will return to posting inane, pointless funny pictures shortly)