Dale Curd | Of Minds and Men Blog

"If You're Looking For Sympathy,..."

2011-07-25T08:43:00.000-07:00

it's between shit and syphilis in the dictionary." Wise words passed on from father to son which the latter shared with me a while back. I've heard a few nuggets like this "suck it up, buttercup", "why don't you go back to your mommy, little boy", many, like these ones are offered as an antidote to a perceived emotional disease. Apparently that disease is contagious if unchecked or corrected

The Power Of A Story

2011-07-18T10:32:00.000-07:00

I love stories.It doesn't have to be a good story to capture my attention and engage me. Any story which has me see a part of myself is a story worth reading or listening to in my books. As you can imagine I hear a lot of different stories. Every day I'm blessed to have the opportunity to listen to many different people and their stories. The experience is enlightening - I think people would

Awakening - What It Means To Know You Are Waking Up

2011-07-07T06:21:00.000-07:00

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Stifling What We Feel

2011-01-04T12:32:00.000-08:00

A simple scenario really. One that I'm sure you know as well.Man comes into a restaurant with his female partner and orders himself a glass of fresh squeezed cherry juice. By the look on his face and his body language, (rubbing his hands together with great zeal), he's really looking forward to sipping this just squeezed goodness. Suddenly, his partner picks up the glass and with it lightly

Hey All You Sellecks, Chaplins, Fu-Manchus, & Handlebar Hanks

2010-09-21T10:47:00.000-07:00

Movember, the World’s Largest Funder of Prostate Cancer Research, is Now Open for Registration for its 4th Canadian CampaignMovember kicks off its 4th annual campaign in Canada today, challenging men across the country to show their support by growing a Mo (slang for moustache) this November. To help support Prostate Cancer Awareness Week (September 19-25), today, men and women across the country

Smelly Feet and The Men Who Own Them

2010-09-09T09:26:00.000-07:00

My boyfriend’s feet are gross. His toenails are long and dirty and his feet smell. I ask him to take better care of himself but he gets angry and tells me to let him be a man – is this true? Are men really like this? H.M. Calgary Yes, some men are like this and while they may pretend or even protest

He Who Never Gets Angry - GuyExpert Answers

2010-08-31T13:43:00.000-07:00

I never get angry. I’ve been married for 20 years and my wife and I have never had an argument and I’ve never raised my voice to her. My friends tell me that I’m not normal – is this true? B.G. Montreal Well you’re not abnormal, rare perhaps, but not abnormal. I’ve probably worked with hundreds of men and I’ve met

Help! I Need Somebody. GuyExpert Answers The Question

2010-08-24T05:08:00.000-07:00

My brother is in a really bad divorce and he’s been so depressed that he has missed work, and missed scheduled pickups for his son – I’m afraid that he will lose access to his son because of his depression – what can I say to him? SG, Toronto It’s clear your brother needs some help and I agree with you unless he’s willing to get that help he is in jeopardy of losing so much more in his

Most Men Dream About An All Sex Relationship

2010-08-10T12:12:00.000-07:00

I’ve been seeing a woman for five years and since the beginning our relationship is really just about sex. The only time she comes over is for sex or when she’s lonely – I want to get out of this but when I’ve tried in the past she has freaked out and become violent and abusive. How do I end it with her?

He's 28, She Just Turned 18, Is It Normal?

2010-07-13T04:45:00.000-07:00

" My son who is 28 is dating a girl who just turned 18, and I want to know if this is normal. I think she is too young for him and I’m concerned that he may be seeing her just for sex." J.W. Ottawa, A lot of guys would believe that your son has hit the proverbial jackpot. And if your son and his girlfriend were ten, or even twenty years

Is Her Boyfriend Cheap? GuyExpert Answers The Question

2010-07-06T06:50:00.000-07:00

Dale, Here’s my issue, I think I have a cheap, or maybe even shallow boyfriend. In October 2008, our first Christmas, I got him a pair of sunglasses ($200) among other things, and he got me a synthetic necklace and pendant that I cannot wear due to nickel/metal allergies. His birthday, I got him a pair of gold earrings ($100) and for my birthday, he got me bath products.

He Has A Blowout With His Daughter - Anger Understood

2010-06-29T07:00:00.000-07:00

Hey GuyExpert, I just had a blowout with my 17-year-old daughter. While I didn’t hit her, in a rage I did grab her wrists and shove her up against a wall. She is now afraid of me and my wife is threatening our 20-year marriage ending if I don’t get help for my ‘anger issue.’ My daughter provoked me and outside of this event, I’ve never done this before so I don’t think

Is His Porn Habit The Real Issue? You Decide.

2010-06-01T06:22:00.000-07:00

My son was fired from his job for watching pornography on his work computer. He says that at his age, (26), pornography is everywhere and everyone does it and it’s not a big deal. In my day I had a private stash of Playboys and Penthouses – so, I’m not sure what the right message is to give him anymore – keep it personal, or go with the flow.

Naked Lunch Anyone?

2010-05-11T07:17:00.000-07:00

I just caught today's Globe article entitled "Naked Lunch," after a friend called to alert me to the piece. I find it curious, our fascination and repulsion around nudity. I think it's dangerous and, much like our conditioned preference towards packaged meat products, we'll soon find ourselves totally removed from a physical connection with our humanity. So fickle is our trained aesthetic

Testing Testing Testing

2010-05-05T18:22:00.000-07:00

Recently, I've become aware that there's a disease spreading through the male population. A disease which if not treated could lead me to be lethargic, ambivalent to sex, or even worse erectionally challenged. I'm told this disease could also soften my muscle tone and make me edgy. It's called Low T, or Low Testosterone, sometimes it's called Andropause or Hypogonadism. I'm also told that

Manly Mo's

2009-11-12T08:06:00.000-08:00

Does facial hair make a man more manly? In this apparent age of sleek and clean albeit hair-less - are men who grow facial hair growing more masculine? Celebrities and fashion role models want us to believe that the new normal for men includes beards and moustaches. Is facial hair an overt visual clue to the world that a man is no longer a boy? I don't know. But as a guy whose face is a

Excellent Script Writer Seeks New Stories!

2009-08-12T08:12:00.000-07:00

No, this isn't an employment call for Hollywood wordsmiths or pitchmen looking to soapbox their latest stories. Rather, it's a plea. I'm looking for excellent scripts about you and the people around you; stories in which the characters are real the situations are also real and either tense, boring, hilarious, or terrifying, and the outcome may never be resolved. I'm looking for you to tell me

The Battle Of Two Wolves

2009-06-15T07:11:00.000-07:00

A Grandfather from the Cherokee Nation was talking with his grandson. "A fight is going on inside me," he said to the boy. "It is a terrible fight and it is between two wolves." "One wolf is evil and ugly: He is anger, envy, war, greed, self-pity, sorrow, regret, guilt, resentment, inferiority, lies, false pride, superiority, selfishness and arrogance." "The other wolf

On Being A Dad - Keynote Address to Dads' Count 09' Conference -June 06, Toronto

2009-06-07T11:40:00.000-07:00

Welcome. I imagine for Brian Russell and Mark McDowell – this is an amazing experience – this moment of seeing you all here – participating in a day that honours and supports Fathers and the important role Fathers have in creating a solid foundation for families. These men began with a vision, chose to commit to that vision, and had the courage to face any number of

Musings On Being A Man

2009-04-23T12:42:00.000-07:00

This month's Esquire magazine features a ream of suggestions for being a man - lots of how to's and must haves. And while captivating, because I picked it up, I haven't actually read any of the copy. My inner monologue is telling me that I'm done being told how to be a man, or what would make me a better man. Not a great place to be in as a counselor who works with men. What has me closed to

His Name is Peter, Peter Walker

2009-03-05T09:04:00.000-08:00

I saw him for the first time outside of my office, in the lobby; he was shivering. Minus 25 outside and he had stepped inside to "get warm." He told me that he couldn't remember where he was supposed to be and he had no idea how he found himself in my lobby. I asked him if I could help, and he said "no, I just want to get warm and then I'll be on my way." He kept his word and several minutes

Melancholy and Mourning and The Sixth Sense

2009-02-11T08:23:00.000-08:00

One of the fundamental aspects of being human is that we are constantly in a state of change. Transition and our response or reaction to change is our greatest teacher. As I write this from my desk and in between sessions, I'm struck with how many men I help who are stuck in a process of change; meaning they're emotionally suspended as change is happening around them. Typically I see men who

Collaborative Divorce - The Only Solution

2009-01-26T06:22:00.000-08:00

50,000 children in Canada will feel the pain of separation and divorce this year.That's 50,000 children whose relationships to their mothers and fathers will change dramatically.That's 50,000 children, perhaps 25,000 boys approximately, who will likely lose intimate contact with the primary male figure in their lives. For some of those boys the loss will be a blessing, yet for most it will be a

Guest Post On HerKind

2009-01-15T09:32:00.000-08:00

Well, it's 12:30p.m. and I'm typing this as I watch people chit chat and connect in my favourite coffee shop The Darkhorse, in Toronto. I hear through the grapevine that their coffee is from Intelligentsia in Chicago. Certainly it's great coffee, and sadly something I will be giving up in a few short days as I am participating in an exciting new fitness programme a colleague, Cherilee Garofano,

10,000 Hours

2009-01-07T12:02:00.000-08:00

Recently I started to pour through Malcolm Gladwell's new book 'Outliers.' It's a fairly good read overall and definitely an improvement over 'Blink', and back up to the calibre of 'The Tipping Point.' One of the ideas which really hit home for me is his concept that mastery is probable through repetition - consistent repetition; and in Gladwell's telling the consistency needs to be repeated