I am not the least bit athletic and it has been a joke among my kids for many years. The Camino Frances from St Jean Pied de Port in France finishes in Santiago de Compostela, Spain and is about 780 km or approximately 500 miles … some what of a daunting task for someone nearing 60. Preparing for this journey will take some time. My planned date for the beginning of my trek will be around September 2013. Earlier if I can whip myself into shape faster!

Sunday May 20^th 2012, 1:07pm. Today is the first rainy day after what seems to be weeks of sun. Appropriately so. It’s not raining today because today is a sad day, I see it more as a cleansing. Rain is an essential part of life, although I would be lying if I said that I haven’t been sadness today.

Since Tuesday night I have been surrounded with the most incredible people… family and loved ones.

Tuesday night, I called to check in on Dad I was sent into a mode of urgency.

It had been two and a half years since Dad was diagnosed with cancer. When he was diagnosed, he was given a year to live but he had goals; my sisters wedding last summer, and soon after the expected birth of his grandson, Matias <3 , last month.

Dad’s strength and determination, which we often used to refer to as stubbornness is such that anyone should be incredibly proud of.

When Dad picked up the phone his words rung in my ear “I’m going Kristel, this is it.”

We immediately rushed over to his house only to find him sitting at the kitchen table eating a late dinner. Thinking I had somewhat overreacted, I felt silly. He looked fine to me.  We sat and visited with him while my Mother and brother arrived shortly after.

That night he mentioned the desire to be admitted to hospice. I didn’t think he was at that point, we decided to play it by ear.

I decided to stay the night at his side. I woke throughout the night as he made his regular trips to the bathroom. It was exhausting. I woke the next morning and I could hardly believe what he had to endure. I had only experienced one night of what he had been enduring for months. My strong and healthy body was exhausted, I could only imagine the toll it was taking on his weak body, barely 100lbs and heavily medicated.

His strength and courage amazed me. In that moment, I developed a deep respect and appreciation for what he had worked so hard to overcome.

Wednesday morning I heard a horribly loud noise above me, he had fallen. I was terrified, it was obvious that things were shifting.

He was admitted to hospice that day. The ambulance came to pick him up, but not before he chose to walk down a full flight of stairs by himself. Right until the last minute he exhibited incredible strength & courage.

Wednesday, Thursday & Friday are somewhat of a blur. What does stand out to me are the actions of the people who were there to shower him with love right up until his very last breath.

Saturday was an incredible day for all of us.

The nurse told us that Dad’s eyes were dilated and that he could go at anytime. Immediately family began showing up and we spent the day circled around him. We held his hands, gently stroked his skin, showering him with words of love, swabbing his mouth and hydrating his eyes. We looked at albums and shared memories, we laughed and we cried. As hard as we cried, we for sure laughed harder.

Of course Dad wasn’t going anywhere Saturday, his hospice room was a Polish Party! It was one final day on earth with loved ones. Dad always loved a good time. He couldn’t speak or physically respond but his facial gestures reacted to the laughter and love in the room.

I was reminded to Remember the little things in life, because they are the big things.

The little things are all around us and we go on missing them every moment. They are gifts. We can become so accustom to their presence in our life that we don’t see them for what they are. A voicemail from a loved one is an incredible gift cause one day we won’t hear their voice any longer.

This experience became an opportunity to observe many things. One being that energy changes form but is always around. I watched Dad as he moved from communicating to a non-responsive state.

Even in his inability to respond, there was peace in just being with him. It made me look deeper into the peace that I was experiencing. If simply being was enough, then why would it change when the life energy that is in dad, leaves the physical body, and moves into it’s present form?

My understanding is that energy is neither created nor destroyed, it always is, always has been and will always continue to be. Although I don’t fully understand at this moment, I know the energy that is him, still is.

An earlier life lesson taught me never cling to something that is no longer. In that clinging, we are in the past and not available to the beauty that exist in the now which is all around us.

The gift of Jerzy Cimoszko as my father, played out it’s perfection in my life, and his impact will continue to do so until I take my last breath.

Today I hugged my kids a little longer, paid a little more attention, said I love you to people I never used to, and I will continue to learn and grow from the experience of the loss of my Dad.

Out of this pain I will expand. In pain we deepen. In that deepening we go more into peace. In peace we bring in room for freedom. In freedom we expand in happiness.

As I left the room one last time, and looked at the body my father had experience this life in, I gave thanks to it for the opportunities it provided him to live and enjoy this life.

Death is not something to be feared. It’s something we don’t understand. Any time we do not understand, our lack of understanding creates fear. I was afraid before and now I am at peace.

Everything we go through in life gives us an endless choice of opportunities. Although some opportunities may seem better than others, the distinction is our mind. We may not want to experience certain experiences, however no one escapes painful situations, it is certain that they are coming. We can embrace what is and look for the beauty, or we can fight it and try to ignore it’s presence in our lives. In embracing we allow the stream to flow, in our fight we attempt to build a wall to stop a natural flow that will only build pressure before finding it’s way out in some form or another.

In an in between state of clarity and confusion my dad asked me a question, he said…

“Did I do it right Kristel?” “You did.” I answered. “Yes, but how do you know?” He responded. I asked him if he trusted me. He said “Of course I trust you.” I asked him “Do you have 5 amazing kids that love you very much?” “Yes.” He said. I asked again “Do you have people all around you that love you?” “Yes.” He said. I asked him one more thing “Are you happy?” “Yes.” As he smiled a huge smile. “Then you did it right.” 

After transitioning into his non-responsive state, I reminded him of the conversation we had shared. I reminded him of all the love ones who were present for him in the room at that moment and everyone who and been there. It was obvious the impact he had in the lives of those he loved. He had done it right.

I sit here in awe right now as I now see how miracles were unfolding throughout this past week that have had such a huge impact on me. I read something that reminded how

We are not human beings having a spiritual experience but rather, We are spiritual beings who are having a human experience.

One day a couple months back after being in Emergency due to complications, Dad looked at me and said “Kristel, you are an angel.” I looked back at him and said “I’m not an angel, I am just a daughter loving her father the way a daughter should.” In that moment I wondered how much love dad had allowed in in his lifetime. What I was doing, wasn’t above and beyond, it was simply love.

It gives me such pleasure knowing that my dad left this experience of life feeling deeply loved and cared for by so many people, who stayed at his side hours upon hours, until the very end. They were there not out of obligation but out of a a genuine love.

There is an acceptance and understanding that is accompanied with peace for me. The tears still come and I know they will. I will be with whatever feelings come and allow myself to feel them as they surface.

A friend reminded me of the incredible balance that exists in nature. He told me how the energy of life is never lacking. When one energy leaves, a new one is already there to create the steady flow and balance that Is.

This next week as we prepare to leave Canada for France, I feel so grateful to have been here at my Fathers side. My wish was to be with him as he left his body, and I was. I held his hand, kissed his cheek, said my goodbye, as did my youngest brother and sister. And when it was right for Dad, he was gone.

I am blessed.

Although no one will ever take Dad’s place. I know that this is the way it is meant to be for all of us. We may not understand it now, and yet it’s perfection will reveal itself in the right time.

I want to take a moment to acknowledge the wonderful people in my life. Thank you to my Aunt and Uncle for loving Dad and taking care of him, feeding him, driving him to appointments and all the things I am not even aware of that you did. Thank you to my Mom, my children, my brothers and sisters, my Aunts and Uncles & to family friends, for all the ways you continue to Be Love.

I love you Dad. Thank you for the experience of life with you.

I would do it all over again. xo

Love Always,

~Kristel

What are Your Thoughts on the Freebie Mentality? I have often wondered what makes people order samples of anything and everything. Why do people buy products that they have coupons for even if the products unhealthy or are items that they would not normally use.

What limitations do you put on yourself? What dreams have you ignored because you thought you couldn’t achieve them? What are you willing to do to change that? When will you step out of your comfort zone? …if not now, will you ever?

Why do small businesses fail, especially direct sales or MLMs? Are we to believe it is the fault of the companies or is it the fault of the people joining? Many people taking advantage of these opportunities have little or no experience in running a business. Do they participate the training that is offered to them and hold appointments with clients or do they expect that miraculously they can build a business with no education and no effort. I believe in most cases, these companies offer a great opportunity for people if they are willing to roll up their sleeves and really work.

For more FREE expert advice on how to start a home business, please visit dalegrove.com. To register for our FREE ezine, please click here Dale Kathryn Grove, formally trained as a fashion designer, has been in the fashion and beauty industry for many years.

Stress Causes Frown Lines so Takes Steps to Reduce It
Meditation is a great way to reduce stress. It can be difficult to learn in the beginning however once you have reduced the mindless chatter in your brain you will feel a deep sense of peace. Done regularly twice a day for 20 minutes in the morning and the afternoon, one of the side effects of meditation that you may notice is increased intuition. Steven Covey talks about “Sharpening the Saw” or time spent in renewal. Meditation is one of the best exercises, I know of, for doing just that.

Exercise for Vitality and Increased Flexibility
Staying active now will prevent many health related issues later in life. Choose some aerobic, some stretching and some weight lifting to get a good balance in your exercise routine. Many more types of exercise are available today than ever before; from pole dancing which is extremely strenuous, to belly dancing, yoga, salsa dancing, kick boxing and martial arts as well as the traditional aerobic and weight classes. Exercising not only keeps your body fit, it stimulates synapses and dendrites in your brain.

Eat Healthy Foods and Use Supplements for Optimum Nutrition
You’ve heard it before “You are what you eat.” Choosing healthy nutritious foods not only helps nourish your body and brain but also your skin. By improving your nutrition and water intake you will revitalize every cell in your body. Supplements are a great way to optimize your nutrition when life gets too busy. Learn to be selective in what you consume and your vitality will soar.

Eliminate Negativity and Negative People in Your Life
Give up gossip. Negativity is a drain on your mental resources and your health. Choose to be around people and places that nourish your soul. It is hard to let people leave your life when they have been friends for a long time however their negativity hurts not only themselves, it drains you. Be a source of joy in other people lives and watch your own life flourish.

Take Personal Time for You
Take a couple of hours a week to spend on things you love to do. You can share this time with friends or use it as solitary time to focus on your goals and aspirations. Getting up early in the morning when everyone else is asleep can be a very productive time for many people because there are no interruptions. The same can be true of time spent after everyone else has gone to bed.

Small steps over a few weeks time integrating some of these ideas into your life will reap many benefits; a sense of peace and contentment, more energy and vitality, better health, a happier lifestyle and a renewed sense of accomplishment. Aren’t you worth it? Find what works for you and “Make your life a mission not an intermission!”

For more FREE expert advice on improving your personal image and personal skin care and beauty routine please visit dalegrove.com. To register for our FREE ezine, please click here Dale Kathryn Grove, formally trained as a fashion designer, has been in the fashion and beauty industry for many years.

How do you take the emotional charge out of the situation or thoughts you are having? Emotionally charged events and even thoughts about the possibility of a confrontation or challenge can sap even the heartiest of souls. In this state, concentration evades you unless you can break or change the tapes you play in your head. You must realistically assess the situation and take action on what you believe will ultimately help move things in a more positive direction.

First acknowledge how much control you actually have in the situation. In many cases we worry about the past over which we have no control. Similarly we also often fret about the future and imagine it to be far worse than ever plays out. If there is something that you actually have some ability to affect in the present, you have a place to begin. Any energy put into worrying about something that you have no ability to change, wastes your valuable time and energy. Just the act of acknowledging the fact that someone else has the responsibility can alleviate the sense of helplessness that we feel.

In addition you must trust that the people who are involved and over which you have no control will manage the situation in a capable manner. If need be at a later date, you can assess the situation again. If your assistance is welcomed, you have the option to advise or to help move things forward. Often we need to let people learn by experience. As with children, we give them “roots and wings” and then let them fly on their own.

Depression can be triggered by a feeling of impotence, lack of control or the inability to change a situation. Being aware of what you can or cannot do helps keep you in your power and permits you stay focused. By choosing a positive, proactive route when faced with this type of situation, you allow the other parties to grow and allow yourself the peace of mind to accomplish what you were meant to do.

For more FREE expert advice on how to start a home business, please visit dalegrove.com. To register for our FREE ezine, please click here Dale Kathryn Grove, formally trained as a fashion designer, has been in the fashion and beauty industry for many years.

You are resisting the “flow” which is the only way the universe sends her goodies to you. You are paddling upstream and just can’t paddle any faster. You feel you have been stuck in the same spot, forever. However, everyday is different and every day you draw to you what you are focusing on.

The only way to change the results in your life is to change the focus. Paddle with the river! Go with the flow and the tasks become easy. Allowing God or the universe to assist you in your desires, results in a massive shift. The most important thing is that you FEEL GOOD about whatever it is that you are doing. If a relationship doesn’t feel good, it probably isn’t good! Pay attention to your gut feelings, the area around your solar plexus. You will have a better idea if you are allowing the “flow” in you life or if you are resisting something.

Ask yourself what it is you are resisting? Is it that the relationship is just not working but you have put too much time into it? What if you don’t meet someone else? Is the job your security blanket? It is a really good income but …you hate the work? Figure out what causes the knot in your gut then eliminate it and restore the “flow” in your life. Doing what you love and feeling passionate about you’re the people and activities in your life will pull all sorts of wonderful synchronicities to you. At that point people will be pointing to you and saying, “He/She has all the luck”!

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Today was interesting as I looked back to the New Year’s Days of my childhood. Some of the traditions have been discarded and although I loved them, I understand why. We are busier now than ever before and don’t make time for the little things we used to do. Our family members are spread out globally now and it is not as easy to get together. However as things change there are always positives that come from it. Time to focus on the wonderful new people (Pedro) that have come into our lives and the new opportunities.