The bane of a bloggers existence some days is the evolution of the Scraper. The Scraper is someone who has set up a website solely to garner advertisers. They have numerous sites like this and they obviously don’t have time to write their own content, so they “scrape” illegally from others. It’s only scraping, though, if they are stealing your entire post¹. Many times these scrapers have automated the process and will scrape directly from your RSS feed. I’ve added on anti-scraping plugins to WordPress which put in things such as unique keys (so that I can search for that key and find who else is using it) and copyright / anti-scrap notices in the post – they alert the reader that if they’re reading the post anywhere other than Dangerouslilly.com, it has been illegally scraped and please contact me.

Even worse, however, is when a fellow community blogger or sex toy manufacturer/retailer uses your content in entirety without permission. Some are just completely uneducated as to the rights and wrongs of blogging, but really….we all started out in the same clueless space and most of us have gotten where we are just fine without violating copyright, stealing content or plagiarizing, ever.

What is Copyright?

According to Wikipedia, copyright ‘is “the right to copy”, but also gives the copyright holder the right to be credited for the work, to determine who may adapt the work to other forms, who may perform the work, who may financially benefit from it, and other related rights.’

A few years ago when I was dealing with a site that took harassing me to a new level, which included posting my photos without my permission, claimed that all was well and fair in the copyright world simply because they had attributed the photos to me. Nope, sorry, that is not the only condition that must be met. Especially not since I have this copyright notice at the end of every post and at the bottom of my main page: “All text and images on this site require permission before they can be used anywhere. To obtain permission click here to contact me”. Notice how I’ve stated that all text and images on this site require permission before they can be used anywhere? Yeah. That’s kinda the whole key.

Permission.

Consent?

eh. fine line.

Microblogging vs Blogging

Now, here’s the rub: With the over-saturation of social media sites where you “share” stuff with your followers, you “reblog” on Tumblr, you “retweet” on Twitter…you have a blurry line of kosher sharing when it comes to blogging. When you reblog and retweet on Tumblr and Twitter respectively, you are copying what someone said and providing attribution. The line is blurred even further with Twitter, where “copyright” doesn’t really seem to exist. I mean, how can you possibly lay copyright to a Tweet? On Tumblr it’s a little different I suppose, but many people treat Tumblr as blogging. So if I posted a photo on Tumblr and nowhere else, I still retain my copyright. That photo is my intellectual property and if you post it on your own Tumblr without an attribution link, then you’ve effectively stolen content.

The fine line lays in the type of sharing. Tumblr, Twitter, Pinterest, even Facebook are all considered forms of “microblogging“; places where the “reblog” is common practice and accepted. Standard Blogging is vast and varied; we’re accustomed to WordPress-based sites, Blogger, LiveJournal, etc but there are many other places as well. Somehow, the concept of “reblogging” seems to have bled over (incorrectly) to regular blogging with the prevalence of microblogging.

Product Reviewing and Ethics

In the past I went toe-to-toe with Lelo when I noticed that suddenly they went from quoting excerpts of reviews to pilfering entire (but slightly modified to remove retailers links and in some cases, had no links to the review itself) review posts. They’d never told anyone reviewing products (given to the reviewer by Lelo) that this would be done; they never asked for permission; and in fact they did this on reviews where the product came from retailers! After raising a fuss like I am wont to do, they apologized and removed it all and now only have excerpts (with links).

I’ve noticed that niche sex toy maker Duncan Charles has been lifting entire reviews², as well, and what’s worse is that they have ignored emails. Back when I posted about Lelo, Shanna Katz commented that it had happened to her a lot over the years as well.  I was offered the chance to do reviews for Nexus and at the time I viewed their site, I noticed that they had full text of reviews with no hyperlink. They had a text-only site address, though. But I wasn’t cool with having my entire review posted so I turned them down.

Ethical Blogging Practices

~Reblogging is NOT copying someone else’s entire blog post without their permission, throwing up an attribution link and calling it well and good. I see this as copyright violation and content theft. Also, just Bad Blogging Manners.  You can quote something from my post, with an attribution and link, and that is a horse of a different color. You can share a photo I’ve posted here via Tumblr, with an attribution and link, and that’s just fine.

~Posting someone’s photo without an attribution is content theft and copyright violation. I don’t care if the click-through link goes to their blog, the attribution line  (and link) is absolutely necessary.

~Creative Commons licenses on someone’s blog does not mean you get to skirt copyright basics or do away with attribution. Creative Commons exists to allow someone the flexibility of letting people know that sharing and even revamping is fine (with attribution) but it doesn’t dissolve copyright.

~And please…don’t EVER think you’re doing someone a favor by putting their content on your site. It’s insulting, it’s copyright violation, and it will earn you a very bad reputation.

Comments

• May 13, 2012, Penny writes: Thanks for sharing this; I didn't know much about scraping before reading it... which WordPress plug-ins do you use? ~ I have a number of them in use for various things. ©Feed does a lot, but the copyright line I have at the bottom of every post and at the page is something I had to add in via editing a few .php files in my theme. "No More Frames" used to prevent my feed from being scraped by bots, but the bots just got smarter and it doesn't work 100% foolproof anymore =/

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Copyright 2008-2011 Dangerous Lilly aka This Could Be Dangerous - If you see this content anywhere else, it's been scraped illegally and without my consent. Copyright violators will be hunted down and beaten with a spiked metal ball. But since they're stupid and will include even this portion, I might as well invite you to my real sex blog where you can read about sex toys and get to know me.

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I love that Rafflecopter makes entering contests and having contests so easy. It’s really a lot less of a headache! Of course, in fairness to all, manual verification of entries still needs to happen to be sure that everybody followed all of my rules and restrictions but I was able to do that as things went along for the most part.

After a lovely run and lots of entries, I’m pleased to announce that the winner is……

Penny, who writes the blog “A Penny for Your Dirty Thoughts”!

Congrats Penny! She really spread the word about sex toy safety – her Twitter posts, Tumblr posts and even a great blog post about sex toy safety!

Comments

• May 13, 2012, Penny writes: yay, I'm so excited!! Thanks for having such a fun contest; I enjoyed writing the blog and spreading the word!

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Copyright 2008-2011 Dangerous Lilly aka This Could Be Dangerous - If you see this content anywhere else, it's been scraped illegally and without my consent. Copyright violators will be hunted down and beaten with a spiked metal ball. But since they're stupid and will include even this portion, I might as well invite you to my real sex blog where you can read about sex toys and get to know me.

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It’s a bit of a long story regarding how I came to be reviewing the Lelo Luna Beads for a second time, but basically I lost the bead holster of my original set of Luna Beads that I reviewed way back in 2008 and I just happened to put them on my Babeland Wishlist. I put them on the wishlist more as a personal reminder that I wanted to replace them but Babeland ended up sending them to me for review, along with the updated version of the Lelo Mia. By now I’m sure you’ve read tons of reviews on the Luna Beads so I’m going to start out this review with a few facts and dispelling of myths; things you’ve probably not read much about.

1. The “retrieval leash” on the Luna Beads has come under fire by many reviewers who don’t understand the overall design. It kind of looks like a tampon string, sure. But it’s not exactly absorbent. It’s made of nylon and is a very hygienic material. More importantly, this material is compatible with the way the Luna Beads are made which leads me to point #2…..

2. Luna Beads are not held together with glue. They are sealed together with an ultra-sonic welding technology, and the nylon cord was one of the only materials compatible with this technique. This method of securing the two halves of the outer ABS plastic balls leads me to point #3….

3. You can boil the Luna Beads for easy cleaning and sanitizing. YES. You can BOIL the Luna Beads.The beads, the holder, everything. Toss it all in and have some Luna soup.

Luna Beads – Why the Nylon Cord?

I talked to Lelo and found out that they spent years working on the design of the Luna Beads and that they were delayed the most with the retrieval leash. They tried many things but finally settled on nylon. The combination of the material and the way Lelo Luna Beads are made means that it’s going to take a LOT of force to break these or have that nylon retrieval leash come apart from the bead. You’ll probably never need to use that kind of force to remove them from your vagina. Some people have almost vilified this retrieval cord in their reviews, saying that it ruins the material safety issues but really….who are you going to be sharing these with?? These are meant to be a Kegel/PC muscle exerciser (not a sex toy) and they were never intended to be used anally. I recently reviewed one of the only other sets of Kegel balls that come in a varied-size set similar to the Lune Bead system, the Bedroom Kandi Hold On To Me, and at first it seemed like they were trying to improve upon the Lelo design. With the HOTM beads, the retrieval leash is part of the bead holster (which means you need 2 holsters…1 for using a single bead and 1 for using the double bead set) and Bedroom Kandi / OhMiBod claims that this is silicone. But it’s not, it’s a silicone-elastomer blend which is porous. It cannot be sanitized. AND it’s incredibly stretchy, turning it into a rubber-band weapon dangling from your vagina, just waiting for slippery fingers to let go so that it can snap your bits like the 4th grade bully who sat behind you. The Luna Beads nylon cord is not stretchy at all, and it is a loop design, making it easy to grasp and pull out.

Body-Safe Materials

The Beads themselves are made from ABS plastic¹, which is a body-safe material free of phthalates, latex or other bad softening agents.  ABS plastic is non-porous. The bead weights are color-coded (pink beads are 28 grams each, blue beads are 37 grams), rather than a stupid painted-on design which rubs off after the second use. The plastic beads have actually changed slightly since I first got mine in 2008. I had noticed that more recent product photos showed that the beads were a little more “fancy” looking than mine – mine were pink and blue, sure, but had a very slight yellowish cast to the color and the plastic was slightly frosted. The newer beads have a truer pink and blue hue (more noticeable to me with the pink) and the plastic is more clear. All in all it’s a slight design change but it makes the beads look a bit less clinical. They are not, however, as shiny and color-saturated as some of the product photos floating around retailer sites.

The bead holster is easier to use than the Bedroom Kandi set; the silicone is matte finish with a slight texture and isn’t very stretchy at all – just stretchy and soft enough to slide the beads in. If lined up just so, the holster will completely cover the hatch-like markings where the bead halves are welded together. Of course for use purposes it’s not exactly necessary, especially for the bead without the retrieval leash. And yes, the holster IS silicone; it passed the silicone flame test. Babeland has listed that the girdle/bead holder is medical-grade silicone but the Lelo site says “FDA approved” and I’ve been told by them that all of their silicone is food-grade. Food-grade silicone isn’t any less body-safe than medical-grade for sex toy purposes.

Cleaning (and boiling) the Luna Beads

I’d never heard before that you could boil the Luna Beads for a better clean. I think I’d just assumed that they would fall apart. Well, they won’t, because glue is not used. And water will not get inside. With my first set of Luna Beads, I did not clean the retrieval leash very well and it ended up yellowing slightly. I talked to Lelo about this and was told that a simple wash with your favorite anti-bacterial toy cleaner followed by a quick 5-minute boil would ensure that there is no staining and every part of the design will be sanitized. Just remove the beads from the holster to ensure that everything gets cleaned.

Pleasure? Beads?

Lelo calls these “Pleasure Beads“. When I first experimented with sex toys and saw those cheap, metal “Ben Wa” balls in the sex toy catalog I wasn’t sure exactly how to use them but I’d heard they were for sex. I couldn’t imagine having sex with some balls stuffed in my vagina! Let me assure you that the Luna Beads are not meant for use during sex. They’re not even really meant to give you an orgasm. What they are meant to do though is strengthen the Kegel/PC muscles (without any effort on your part) and in turn that will give you stronger orgasms and more pleasurable PIV sex. It will also contribute to a healthier bladder and fewer accidents when you sneeze (if you’re young enough that you don’t know what I mean by that last statement, then STFU and I hate you).

Believe me, these work, and you don’t even have to do anything. I know because once, after being away from the Luna Beads for too long, I thought I’d just go ahead and step right on up to  2 blue balls at once. Not only did I skip ahead a few steps but I probably wore them for a few hours longer than I should have. The next day my PC muscles were sore – just like any other muscle would be if I exercised too much. I can never remember to do active Kegel exercises, so these things are great for me.

I’ve heard from some women that they can feel them moving easily, some cannot feel them, and some are bothered by the movement. It’s actually not so much the large Luna Bead moving around inside of you, but the smaller weighted bead rattling around and pinging off the sides of the plastic ball. Whenever the weighted bead taps your vaginal wall, your PC muscles automatically contract just a tiny bit. The muscle contraction is not something I’ve ever felt. But this is how they work those muscles without requiring you to clench and release yourself. Over the course of a few hours you’ll have achieved the same level of Kegel exercise as if you’d done 4 or 5 “sets” of active exercises throughout the day. These only work if you’re mobile, however, not if you’re sedentary. It’s best to insert them before you go for a walk, run errands, or anything slightly active. The more active you are, the more these weighted beads will rattle around inside the plastic shell and the more your muscles will be tapped.

A lot of women find that wearing the Luna Beads will increase vaginal secretion (during use) and the mere presence of something subtly moving can increase natural arousal. But, please, don’t call these a “sex toy”.

Some reviews I’ve read have claimed that these are “noisy”. Rest assured, there is no discernible noise whatsoever to anyone other than you. You are simply “hearing”/feeling an internal activity. To you it seems noticeable but it definitely is not to anyone else. The metal Ben Wa balls I once owned had a bizarre musical tinkling sound whenever they moved. Lelo Luna Beads have a rubber-coated weight which is virtually silent when they’re in your body.

And the Winner is…

I’ve owned and worn exactly once a set of Fun Factory Smart Balls which did absolutely nothing for me. As I already mentioned, the Bedroom Kandi Hold on to Me balls had visual appeal but lacked in common sense or material safety. Another set of sort-of progressive weighted kegel beads is the Je Joue Ami set; I’ve not tried them but Epiphora has and I agree with her assessment: Bizarre design and what is UP with this stretchy retrieval cord again??

This is probably one of the few Lelo products that I fully love and endorse. Lelo Luna Beads are simply the best in class. Thanks to Babeland for giving me a replacement set and a second chance to find out even more sex geek facts on this awesome product.

Comments

• May 12, 2012, Literalman writes: I'm curious: what's your take on using pure Teflon for sex toys? I really haven't seen anything online about whether it's a good idea or not, but it's used for internal use so I'd assume it should be safe. For instance, check out http://www.precisionballs.com/catalog/index.php?cPath=39&sort=4a&page=3 for pure teflon balls in useful sizes that are commercially available. What do you think? Thanks! ~ Where does it say that those are safe for internal use? So far as I've ever known, the safety of Teflon has always been in question. If your pan is flaking, ditch it. But regardless a solid ball or two is nothing like the Luna Beads system with the weighted ball inside the plastic. It wouldn't at all have the same effect. And since there would be no retrieval cord, it would be cumbersome. I can't see why one would want to do this method, at all.
• May 13, 2012, Epiphora writes: This is an awesome post. And it makes me love the Luna Beads even more than I already do! Too bad I didn't know about the boiling thing sooner, as the retrieval cord on mine is a bit yellow as well. Maybe I can bleach it. These are pretty much the only vag balls with a good retrieval cord, and they feel the best too. LUNA BEADS FTW.

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Copyright 2008-2011 Dangerous Lilly aka This Could Be Dangerous - If you see this content anywhere else, it's been scraped illegally and without my consent. Copyright violators will be hunted down and beaten with a spiked metal ball. But since they're stupid and will include even this portion, I might as well invite you to my real sex blog where you can read about sex toys and get to know me.

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Please allow this old lady a bit of self-involved moping and grumping for a mo’, would ya?

Last year’s birthday REALLY sucked. Perhaps this year’s birthday won’t suck so badly because I’m aware that it will suck in advance and I am preparing myself for that. The asshole now-ex-friend who forgot my birthday last year is off the hook now due to being a large douchebag who I don’t speak to anymore. Husband has informed me that he will not at all be up for anything fun or even dinner out, due to very stressful workplace goings-on this month that have my poor guy so wound up that we’re both at our less-than-best lately. We’re rescheduling for an unknown date in the near-ish future, at least.

Even my birthday wish list was produced with as much effort as pulling one’s own teeth. Money would be grand, though, so if a bunch of people were to buy sex toys from my affiliate links over there in the sidebar, I’d be tickled pink! We’ve decided to save up for the down payment on a house so any job offers or projects would be lovely too.

In a few weeks I’m turning 35 and I must admit I’m not pleased with that. I can’t say anymore that I’m vaguely in my “early 30′s”. I’ll suddenly be closer to 40 than 30 by just a smidge. Age is just a number, you say? 35 is the new 25, you say? The problem is I’m most certainly feeling like I’ve not done jack shit of importance in my life, that I’ve behind the 8-ball and failing miserably.

Growing up, my birthday was usually a big deal. I guess that’s what you get when you’re an only child? I wasn’t lavished with expensive presents but I didn’t ask for anything expensive, either. I don’t think it existed! We didn’t have cell phones or computers or handheld game thingiemabobbers. WE HAD STICKS. Ok, fine, it was better than sticks. And aside from my senior prom falling on my birthday one year and half the invitees not showing up to my 16th party, birthdays as a kid were pretty good. I’d have one with friends and then one with family. God, I miss my grandmother’s cake frosting.

So yeah…I guess the reason why my birthday list is so short on tangible items is that I’m realizing I’d rather have people. I’d like to go back to the busy, love-filled birthdays of childhood. I want to spend a whole day doing fun sightseeing with my husband, something we haven’t done in ages. I’d like to feel loved and appreciated by friends and family. Are we really all too damn busy for birthdays anymore? Are we really at the level where the most we can be arsed to do is post something on someone’s Facebook wall (and only then because Facebook reminds you) and call it job well done?

(please don’t comment to wish me a happy birthday, or I will stab you)

Comments

• May 8, 2012, Erin B writes: I know the feeling about birthdays sucking. I'm glad yours in the past as been great until recent years. I'm turning 26 (please dont kill me for saying that) and my mom had the gumption to say "You're getting old!" My birthdays have always sucked. My birthday is on the 18th, and from the town I'm from, 2 weekends before theres a huge marathon, with the following weekend having a festival and parade, then the weekend after there's Memorial Weekend, so that means there was never any money for my birthday and everyone always had plans, so no party. I wish you the best celebration when you do celebrate and hope things cheer up and work out soon. Btw, love your blog :D
• May 8, 2012, Nadia West writes: I turn 40 in November. You think YOU'RE having angst?? lol Seriously though, I'm with you on the time with friends thing being the best present. I'm contemplating a big birthday 'do at home and inviting tons of friends (you'd definitely be on the list). I figure, a birthday is at least an excuse to throw a party and see friends. I won't wish you a happy birthday since I don't want to be stabbed. How about... you rock? I need to refer a friend to your site since she's not in the know about safe sex toy materials and you have covered so much.
• May 8, 2012, Sierra writes: I feel the same... Exactly. Here I thought I was the only one. I have 9 days my 30th birthday. Hang in there..
• May 8, 2012, Bob writes: Thirty-five is the new 15 so sit back and enjoy your puberty while it lasts, girl. :)
• May 10, 2012, Penny writes: you said you don't think you've done anything of importance, but I love your blog and am inspired by it as well as e[Lust] and Wanton Wednesday...and I'm sure many others would say the same. Also I feel you on the birthdays not being a big deal anymore...I did get to go out with my bf which I am grateful for, but since I recently deleted facebook only a few people remembered it.

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Copyright 2008-2011 Dangerous Lilly aka This Could Be Dangerous - If you see this content anywhere else, it's been scraped illegally and without my consent. Copyright violators will be hunted down and beaten with a spiked metal ball. But since they're stupid and will include even this portion, I might as well invite you to my real sex blog where you can read about sex toys and get to know me.

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Entirely too long ago I received the Spirit vibe from Leaf to review. I sometimes wonder why it takes me so long to write certain reviews while others seem to write themselves, and I realized why: When I don’t love or hate a toy, I find it hard to know what to say. And that’s the problem here; I don’t love or hate the Spirit.

Spirit is tiny; smaller than I expected. For some reason I expected it to be more along the lines of the Layaspot in size, but it’s actually a little smaller than the Je Joue MiMi and definitely smaller than the We Vibe Touch. Which means that for some people it could easily get misplaced. Of course that bright, spring-green color would make it more difficult to lose it.

Green Squared

The entire Leaf vibes line is touted as being “green”; not just green in color (as it’s the only color option available) but environmentally-speaking a “good idea”. The thought is that silicone rechargeable vibrators are more “green” since there are no disposable batteries. Of course, one argument is that disposable batteries can be recycled or simply tossed in the garbage with no serious effects to the landfills  while very few people would ever recycle the rechargeable portion of a vibrator (mainly because you’d have to recycle the whole toy and there aren’t a lot of sex toy recycling places out there, plus it’s a bitch to get the battery out of the toy). Another way that Leaf is pushing the green aspect is in their packaging, which gets met with some argument as well. The box is all recycled cardboard; it’s heavy and sturdy cardboard though, with a magnetic closure so it would be great for storage. It’s not a 100% discreet storage option but yet it doesn’t use the words “sex toy” or “vibrator” anywhere on the box. Instead it says “Natural Pleasure“. The included storage pouch looks like hemp but is probably just cotton canvas. The only plastic to be found was the plastic bags used to contain the vibe and the charger. I think that overall there is a step in the right direction for being more environmentally conscious and not just for being a silicone sex toy.

Powered by PowerBullet

The reason I was so interested in the Leaf line was because the motor is “Powered by PowerBullet”; The Jopen Vanity line is also made with PowerBullet motors and since I adore my VR6 so, so very much I had high hopes for Leaf Spirit. After I did some research, though, I found out that only one other vibrator (not something made by a US-distributed company) powered by PowerBullet is as strong and rumbly as the VR6. Ah well. This isn’t to say that the Leaf Spirit is weak; it’s not. It’s really got quite a punch. In fact I’d easily compare it to the Je Joue Mimi. I’d say that the We Vibe Touch is perhaps a bit more powerful (there is one caveat to all three of these, which I’ll get to in a minute) but the We Vibe Tango & Salsa are more powerful than any of the aforementioned three vibes. The reason for this is because the Spirit, MiMi and Touch all have what is, to me, a fatal flaw: as soon as pressure is applied to the vibrator or it is surrounded by flesh (hello, fleshy labia) the vibrations greatly decrease. They go from deep and rumbly and powerful to almost surface-buzzy and moderate. It’s a huge let-down. This could be happening with the Spirit because it is so small. Perhaps a larger model would fare better because there would be more space to hold it (holding it firmly is also “pressure” in terms of muting the vibrations). But if I had to quantify the difference, I would say that the Leaf Spirit is 3 times more powerful when you’re just barely holding it compared to if you have a good grip on it and/or are applying pressure (you’d likely require a good grip on it if you get it slick with lube or body fluids).

I’m also a little disappointed that when it’s not in use the Spirit doesn’t hold a charge very well. It has an impressive Run Time vs Recharge Time ratio: 2.6 hours of run time for only 2 hours of recharge time (according to the company). Many rechargeable sex toys require more charge time than you’ll get in play time.

Like all luxury sex toys, the Leaf line is covered in pure medical-grade silicone and is very body safe. It’s waterproof, great for travel and the curved shape of the Spirit would work well laying against your pubic mound during penetrative sex.  Due to the small size of Spirit, the whole toy vibrates but the motor is located in the tip. There is a seam in the silicone skin but only the most sensitive people would feel it. Spirit has only one button so it’s easy to use, yet if you want to go down a step in power you have to cycle through and turn it off, first. I’m not a huge fan of that. I also think that the vibe itself would be more aesthetically pleasing without the abundance of required markings on the top, but they are sadly required to be there by law. They do blend in and might even add just a hint of texture for holding on to it. The silicone skin covering the hard plastic toy is the silky soft type and so it’s not a huge dust-magnet like We Vibe silicone can be.

Final thoughts

Would I recommend this? Eh. It depends. If you don’t like pressure with your vibes, or you don’t require a very powerful vibe and you adore the smallness and the green-ness, then yes. Otherwise? I’d probably recommend something else for the money. Cute only goes so far in my book.

Click here to read about the properties of silicone sex toys and care & cleaning  |  This toy was provided in exchange for an honest review

Comments

• May 7, 2012, solitudinarian writes: Thanks, this was really helpful. I need pressure to get off so I think I'll pass. Agree with you about the recycling issue - I have yet to find a place in Australia that recycles sex toys.

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Copyright 2008-2011 Dangerous Lilly aka This Could Be Dangerous - If you see this content anywhere else, it's been scraped illegally and without my consent. Copyright violators will be hunted down and beaten with a spiked metal ball. But since they're stupid and will include even this portion, I might as well invite you to my real sex blog where you can read about sex toys and get to know me.

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“Contrary to what some people seem to believe, simple writing is not the product of simple minds. A simple, unpretentious style has both grace and power. By not calling attention to itself, it allows the reader to focus on the message”
–Richard Lederer and Richards Dowis, Sleeping Dogs Don’t Lay, 1999. More Words of Wisdom

Journalists and book authors were once held to impeccably high standards in terms of grammar, spelling and content matter. Somehow our society has degraded on the whole to what feels like a 4th grade level. Sometimes it’s even worse thanks to the prevalence of “text speak” in situations where it is so very inappropriate. Hyperbole and a Half said it best (regarding coping mechanisms to avoid exploding in a ball of white hot fury): “When someone types out “u” instead of “you,” instead of getting mad, I imagine them having only one finger on each hand and then their actions seem reasonable.  If I only had one finger on each hand, I’d leave out unnecessary letters too!”

Scenario 1: I decided to read Fifty Shades of Grey recently out of journalistic compulsion given all the drama and controversy surrounding it. While I can appreciate the overall sentiment to the book, the author’s absolutely horrid writing skill and dreadful lack of editing (and seeming inability to pick up a Thesaurus) ruined the promising plot and eclipsed even the awful and baffling fictional depiction of a BDSM relationship. Read the reviews on Amazon; some annoyed readers took to looking up the word count for certain things on their Kindle edition. I don’t care to do it for myself but someone else did! The repetition of words is distracting to the point of ruin. I’ve seen many media bits about this book/trilogy that laud it as “well written”. This is well written? Seriously? I have many more thoughts on this book but that is meant for another post. Jeez. Oh my…!

Scenario 2: I was reading the report on CNN about the Army nurse captain who died during a Skype call to his wife. The original story has now been fixed but when I read it it was:  “(CNN) — An Army captain’s wife witnessed her husband’s die while the couple was engaged in one of their regular video chats”" Oh CNN, why? Who should be blamed here? The writer or the editor or both?

Scenario 3: I like my erotica. Let me rephrase that: I like my well-written erotica. I do not expect something to be at the level of Anne Rice or whatnot but I do expect that you’ve read through it before hitting “publish” to pick out any spelling errors. When someone relies heavily on spell-check it is obvious! There is one erotica blogger/writer that I read despite the annoying spelling errors they refuse to care enough about. I notice the errors because of the tone of the prose; each error sticks out like a sore thumb. It causes me to halt in my reading like a needle being yanked off a record to figure out what word they meant to use. Oddly enough if it were a transposed letter, like writing “soemtimes”, then I would be more likely to not notice. But when one leaves off a letter (not/no, off/of, and/an, an/a, too/to) or screws up too/to/two or your/you’re or simply uses bizarre swaps like the/that it comes across as lazy writing. Unintelligent writing.

Scenario 4: Recently I’ve been editing on-site sex toy reviews before they go live. I fully understand that everyone has to start somewhere. Even I cringe at my early reviews for the tone and my childlike enthusiasm for some things. However….some people should not be writing reviews. Of any type, in any place. In fact they should please just stop writing altogether. Some of the reviews are so bad it’s difficult to edit them for better grammar without resorting to re-writing them entirely, which I’m not willing to do. I wish now that I’d copied the original bits from some of the particularly bad ones just to show as evidence.

I realize that most bloggers are not being paid for their words. But whether it’s a blog post or a sex toy review – don’t you care about how you look to others? A spelling error or two I can forgive. I’ve done it. But when it is consistently done then I stop respecting you. If it is done to the point of distraction then I’ll just stop reading your blog altogether. I also realize that many people are purposely writing to mimic the way they speak. This is fine to a point. And I’ll admit that comma placement still confuses me sometimes but when I see people obviously abusing it to the point where even I think it’s too much, I have to wonder about their intelligence. I’m not a “grammar Nazi” and I’m not a college English professor. I’m just a reader who wants to read words that make sense when thrown together in sentences and paragraphs. I don’t expect perfection; I just expect simple readability.

Read through your blog post or product review before you publish it! If you need to, read it out loud to aid in finding typing mistakes, run-on sentences or missing words. Polish up on comma placement (you don’t have to put a comma in a sentence for every time you would pause in speech); bookmark sites that have a list of commonly misspelled words such as lose vs loose or breath vs breathe (the latter is one I always screw up); stop using “alot“; learn possessive vs plural; and for the love of Pete if you’re writing about sex toys it is SILICONE not silicon. Another bizarre mistake I keep seeing is forgetting to use a question mark to cap a sentence that was obviously started in the tone of a question. Something I personally should learn to fix is something called “writing in the passive voice“. It’s how I speak and therefore how I write. Not enough importance is placed anymore on simple things such as apostrophes in contractions or capitalizing “I”. Another trick to figuring out if your personal speaking/writing voice comes off stilted/weird/wrong to others is to read through your writing and be sure to pronounce every word fully. Example: “…the reason for that is that Mary thinks…”¹. Say it the way you speak naturally. Do you change the second “that” so it sounds more like “thet” or “thit” and it rolls off the tongue quicker? Now read it again where both “that”s are the same and rhyme with “hat”. It sounds weird, right? Redundancy!

Mark Twain: “As to the adjective, when in doubt, strike it out.”

When you write in the passive voice or have run-on sentences longer than the average paragraph….with lots of ellipses….with alot of redundant phrases ….. can tick of even the most forgiving reader². There are a lot of helpful sites³ that can make you a better writer. Letting out this rant and researching the links for common mistakes has opened my eyes to things I do wrong, too, so I’m not proclaiming to be a perfect bastion of the English language here!

I also recognize that true blogging⁴ contains many moments when your text is your voice – or rather, your speaking voice replacement – and that writing in your speaking voice is more acceptable there (to a point). I’ve done it a lot and I’ve seen plenty of others do it in ways that personality, dialect and humor/emphasis shine through wonderfully. But when you write a post that you want others to take seriously, you should take a moment or three before publishing the post to the public. I can’t tell you how many times I’ve wanted to showcase a blog post as my Editor’s Pick on e[lust] because of the subject matter but bypassed it because the writing was just atrocious.

And finally, remember this: we are largely an online-only community. Your written words are your clothes, your power, your voice, your facial expressions and that by which we measure intelligence, personality and even attractiveness. Does your writing portray you in the best light? Please don’t underestimate the power and sexiness of intelligence.

Comments

• May 6, 2012, Epiphora writes: I so agree that some people just should not be writing. Some people, like you say, really are so horrible at it that they should go find another hobby. I've been told that I'm a terrible person for saying that, but I don't care. That's how I feel. I like your point about how our writing is our power. That is very true.
• May 6, 2012, Tom Allen writes: _this_ on the entire post. My expectations have gotten so low that I'm happy just to see a blog post with paragraph breaks and capital letters. Never mind a blog post, I get *business* email that is so atrocious that I'm often tempted to correct it and return it, adding "Is this what you meant to say?" I have taken the worst blogging offenders off of my blogroll and RSS reader because they were too painful. ~Oh yes, I happily point out errors on business emails. Once I even turned over a particularly awful PR agent to the company who'd hired her to promote their shit. Fucking baffling.
• May 6, 2012, Jayne writes: I couldn't agree more. I'm genuinely mortified if my Husband points out a spelling error or typo after I've pressed 'publish' and if I'm honest, there are several blogs that I've stopped reading, despite quite liking the authors and chatting with them on Twitter. I find poorly written blogs a pointless waste of time and I don't like reading lazily written and badly edited posts. I don't care if that makes me a bad person, I read blogs for pleasure, not charity and if reading them gives me no pleasure I stop. Simple. Also, while I'm not really a regular reader of erotica, I can't think of anything that would be more of a turn off than a spelling, grammar or typing error in that type of literature. Stone. Cold. Turn off.
• May 6, 2012, Scarlet writes: As someone who does tend to make a good amount of errors when I write because of typing to quickly and dyslexia, I agree with this. Though, since starting my blog, I have seriously started taking the time to catch these things. To check my spelling/grammar and other errors that I might have made. While I still miss a few here and there...Chrome and the Spellchecker on WordPress get the ones that I miss. I am hoping that over time I can become better at it, and therefor a better writer. But in Erotica, yeah that just gets me to put down my book very quickly. I am trying very hard to make it through 50 Shades of Grey myself, its a trying experience and I am almost tempted to try the drinking game to ease the process. ~I like asking blogger friends to read over my "important" posts before publishing to make sure it makes sense to others and that I didn't do my "going off on a tangent" thing too much. Oh and if you played a drinking game w 50 Shades you'd be in a coma by Chapter 3!
• May 6, 2012, Curvaceous Dee writes: Agreed agreed and agreed! I always read my posts over before publishing (at least once) and almost always ask a partner to check it too. There's very nearly always something I've missed - I have a tendency to read what I intended to write, rather than the words actually on the screen. It's definitely worth that second look. xx Dee
• May 7, 2012, Jillian writes: Agreed. But now I can't help being paranoid about my own spelling. x

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Copyright 2008-2011 Dangerous Lilly aka This Could Be Dangerous - If you see this content anywhere else, it's been scraped illegally and without my consent. Copyright violators will be hunted down and beaten with a spiked metal ball. But since they're stupid and will include even this portion, I might as well invite you to my real sex blog where you can read about sex toys and get to know me.

Tweet this!

It’s been 100 editions and just over 2 years since I first rebelled. Wanton Wednesday has really picked up some steam lately and I’m thrilled to see everyone enjoying themselves. I haven’t really taken anything new in ages (haven’t felt up to it) so I figured that for the 100th edition I’d get fancied up. Sparkly jewels, lacy bra, pretty lingerie…oh wait. That last bit seems to have problems staying on! I couldn’t choose between the two photos, so you get both. I puttered around in Photoshop for over an hour just having fun with filters and tweaks.

Check out what the rest of the group is up to this week!

Comments

• May 1, 2012, Mrs. M writes: Love your pics! My husband and I both agreed that you have a stellar rack! :) Congrats on the 100th edition!!!
• May 1, 2012, Curvaceous Dee writes: And don't you look glorious! I really enjoy Wanton Wednesday - I've participated 86 times out of the last 100, which I think is a pretty good rate, all things considered :) xx Dee
• May 2, 2012, solitudinarian writes: The combination of the red and the grey looks really good together and suits your skin tone nicely :)
• May 2, 2012, KaziGrrl writes: Sparkly indeed!! both lovely photos :) Congrats on the 100th edition of a great meme, and here's to many more!! ~Kazi xxx
• May 2, 2012, Molly writes: Happy 100th anniversary.... I have been a regular and dedicated of Wanton Wednesday and I credit it with being the starting place of many of my on-line blogging friendships that have enriched my life. I love this community and take great pleasure in being a part of it. Here's to another 100 editions and more! Mollyxxx
• May 2, 2012, Jade writes: I started out over there on the list that this one grew (rebelled) out of - and I was ever so glad that you DID rebel, for so many of the reasons you did. I can post here what *I* like, and never feel...ostracized or looked-down on for my choices, no matter how "inappropriate" or slutty or sexy or naughty or BDSM-y or "not artful" they are! Thank you so much all you do! Jade
• May 2, 2012, Jade writes: PS- Beautiful shots, Lilly.
• May 2, 2012, JJJ writes: Wow!!! What a post for 100th Edt!! Can't agree more with all the comments above. Just can't get enough of your lovely photos.
• May 2, 2012, Jack and Jill writes: Gorgeous shots! We love your lips in the first shot, but we are especially mesmerized by the second one! Absolutely stunning! Congratulations on 100 weeks! We're glad to be able to participate!
• May 2, 2012, Scarlet writes: Congratulations on 100 wanton weeks! Even though its my first participating I am so happy I am able to. And you look stellar, that bit of sparkle with the grey is divine!
• May 2, 2012, Penny writes: beautiful, I love them both! Your composition, lacy bra and sparkly necklaces are exquisite, not to mention the lovely lady wearing them ;)
• May 3, 2012, thelongbean writes: Lovely lady and all sparkly, so appropriate for your 100th edition.
• May 4, 2012, Sex Musing writes: You've captured glamour and glory here - we think you are erotic royalty. Thank you for the meme. Sex Musing
• May 4, 2012, Alan & Michele writes: Gorgeous pictures Lilly, and congrats on 100 weeks!

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Copyright 2008-2011 Dangerous Lilly aka This Could Be Dangerous - If you see this content anywhere else, it's been scraped illegally and without my consent. Copyright violators will be hunted down and beaten with a spiked metal ball. But since they're stupid and will include even this portion, I might as well invite you to my real sex blog where you can read about sex toys and get to know me.

Tweet this!

Image courtesy of Crystal Delights

Here’s a butt plug….Happy Mother’s Day!

That’s not something I’ll ever say to my mother. But thankfully there are millions of partners and husbands and wives around the world who just might love to say that to the mother of their children! Flowers are commonly given for Mother’s Day but what do you do when you want something more sensual and sexy? I say skip the floral-scented bodywash and give her the pink Crystal Delights Atomic Rose Plug. This gorgeous, glass butt plug is handcrafted here in the US and Shellie, the owner of Crystal Delights, inspects each and every glass sex toy that goes out her door so you know that you’re getting something of high quality (did you catch my interview post with her?)

Giveaway Details:

You’ll have your choice between the clear or frosted version of the Atomic Rose Butt Plug. The contest is open to anybody in the US or Canada and you’ll talk to Crystal Delights directly to give them your personal info. Contest runs from April 30th until May 12th. The winner will be chosen on Mother’s Day (May 13th). 

Entries will be gathered using Rafflecopter. If I can’t verify your entry then it will get deleted – so if I ask for more information from you in entry details, you need to provide it for your entry to count!

Crystal Delights Plug Details:

Featuring the brand new Crystal Delights CAC Atomic Rose pink plug, available in your choice of a smooth or a frosted finish. The Atomic Rose plug is a Colors Against Cancer (CAC) Small Pink Plug adorned with a beautiful vintage glass Atomic Rose medallion from the Czech Republic. All Crystal Delights plugs include a custom made-in-the-USA bag for safe and discreet storage of your new Crystal Delights objet d’art.

The Atomic Rose Plugs

a Rafflecopter giveaway

Comments

• May 2, 2012, KaziGrrl writes: I just hope I remember to keep coming back! :s I would love to win this... ~Kazi xxx

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Copyright 2008-2011 Dangerous Lilly aka This Could Be Dangerous - If you see this content anywhere else, it's been scraped illegally and without my consent. Copyright violators will be hunted down and beaten with a spiked metal ball. But since they're stupid and will include even this portion, I might as well invite you to my real sex blog where you can read about sex toys and get to know me.

Tweet this!

There are two sex toy materials that seem to scare the uninitiated: Glass and wood¹. It is ironic considering that the material you should be the most scared of is the one 50% of customers purchase willingly and gleefully. But glass is strong, non-porous, is not made with chemicals and is compatible with every type of lube.

The World of Glass Sex Toys

The glass we use is Borosilicate glass (often known as the trade name “Pyrex”). A 1-inch rod of Pyrex glass requires more than 3000 pounds of pressure to snap in half and has a crush strength of over 8 tons. Our glass pieces, after being formed initially,  are put back into the kiln and “annealed” (heated) almost back to melting point. This gives each piece its final smoothness and brings the glass back to its full strength because all the parts have been completely fused together into a single solid work of art.  This adds hours of extra time to the process and is one of the first places that will be scrimped on with the much less expensive glass products.  Knowing where the glass comes from is really important to help you understand that every piece you receive is a unique handmade piece of art crafted lovingly just for you!

Shellie, owner of Crystal Delights glass dildos and plugs

Not all glass sex toys are created equal, however. I’ve certainly been disappointed in quality issues with glass dildos I’ve received (the most obvious being the ugly one) – mainly because despite the “hand-blown” buzz word, the toys were mass-produced and failed to look like the photos provided. When you buy a glass sex toy you absolutely must be prepared to receive something that is not a perfect replica down to the millimeter of the photos and specs on the retail site you’re purchasing from. But yet too much of an anomaly leads to surprises of the bad kind, disappointments, and sometimes leaves you with a sex toy you have no desire to use. I’ve owned glass dildos from Pipedreams, Joyful Pleasures, Dream Toys and SSA Glass. Joyful Pleasures was probably the best out of those but it still was a let down due to the size difference from their stats to what I actually received. The SSA Glass dildos were all huge disappointments in all aspects: quality, design and consistency. But then again the saying “you get what you pay for” is true; SSA Glass is cheap and it shows. The cheaper glass sex toys still won’t break during sexual use but they might chip more easily. They certainly won’t have the artistic beauty and careful construction like truly hand-made glass toys will.

One thing that all of the above sex toy manufacturers have in common is that their glass dildos are produced in a large plant in China. This isn’t necessarily a death sentence but it depends on how involved the manufacturer is in their quality control – I’ve dealt with companies who manufacture in China and they turn out quality products that are consistent. But what if you knew that your sex toy was made locally by a skilled artisan and that it passed through only a few hands before arriving on your doorstep?

Crystal Delights – Small Manufacturer of High-Quality Glass Sex Toys

I have talked with Shellie, the owner, a few times about sex toy businesses and her glass sex toys. Talking to her always reinforces why we should make the effort to choose small sex toy companies over the Founding 5. Shellie designs the toys, inspects them and packages them up for shipment herself. You’ll never receive a plug or dildo or paddle that she hasn’t personally looked over to make sure it meets her standards. She uses just one local glass blower who is very adept at creating consistently high quality items. While you still see minor differences in size because there is no mold to fill, you can also do something with Shellie that you can’t do with larger companies: Talk to her. I know, it’s a novel idea! But let’s say that you’re eying up her small glass butt plug and you’re still really new to anal plugs. You might feel a little nervous about the size and wish that it was a little smaller. All you have to do is email Shellie and tell her that you’d like a plug that runs a little under the normal specs. If you’d like to go even further you can contact her to make a custom piece!

I have my own glass plug² courtesy of Shellie and I’ve seen all of her stuff in person a few times. The vintage plugs, the Swarovski crystal plugs and dildos, the glass paddles, the tail plugs – it is all, without a doubt, the most stunning and sparkly glass sex toy collection I’ve ever seen. Not one piece looked weird or wonky. In fact, I don’t think I’ve even read a bad review on her stuff.

Image courtesy of Crystal Delights

I asked Shellie a few questions because I’m a Sex Toy Geek!

How do you come up with your designs?

The basic design is the easy part!  You can get inspiration from almost anything, it can be the color, the shape, the attachment (crystal, medallion, tail) or even a customer request, can I have this but bend it this way or add a bump here, shorter, longer, you get the point.  But that really is the beauty of glass, it is very adaptable!

Do you do a lot of testing and revamping the designs before you list them?

That is a difficult question, sometimes things just come together and its fast and perfect right off the bat, but other times it takes months to get it just right, there is testing here before it goes out to my “product testers” and then feedback from them before it is ready to launch.  What I think is a brilliant idea sometimes isn’t!

What sort of “quality control” things do you do that a large manufacturer overseas wouldn’t do?

This is one of the things that I love about glass manufacturing, I touch and look at every piece of glass that goes out the door to a customer. And I am the second line that has done that, because the glass blower has already looked at it as well.  We want to be able to take those extra steps to make sure we are giving you the best possible product for your money.  We know that you have many choices and we want you to be glad you picked us for your business.   I try to be available as much as possible via social media, email, even phone to help with anything that might come up, we want you to know we take customer service, and our products seriously.

Can you work with people to create a custom design or size?

We can and do!  I have several custom pieces out there already and I often contact people when I get a special tail, or medallion in that I think they would love.  Again that is part of what is special about handmade glass from a small company; I like to know my customers and what they want and ,if there is any way possible, get it to them.  That isn’t a possibility from the big box manufacturers importing from China.

Glass Sex Toy Pros, Cons and Myths

• Pro: Glass is non-porous and free of any chemicals that might be harmful
• Pro: Glass is compatible with any type of lube
• Pro: Glass is easy to clean (depending on the design, of course as some more elaborate designs can require more than just a rinse to get in the crevices) and can be sterilized in boiling water or the top rack of your dishwasher. Check with the manufacturer, though, before subjecting it to high heat.
• Myth: Glass sex toys will break during use – I don’t know what people think when they think of glass sex toys but the truth is that they’re made out of a very sturdy and solid glass (borosilicate) that is resistant to cracks and damage. This isn’t like your grandmother’s antique glassware or anything. 98% of glass sex toys are solid, not hollow³.
• Myth: Glass sex toys will cut/injure you – Unless you managed to chip it, that’s simply impossible. Before you use your glass sex toys you should always inspect them for damage. While they are difficult to damage with normal use, it’s still possible to accidentally drop it on the wrong surface at the wrong angle and incur damage. 
• Pro: Glass is a natural and reusable material. Have a glass toy that chipped? Safely smash it up to bits and use it in a mosaic somewhere; otherwise try to locate a recycler who takes this type of glass (Just ask if they recycle Pyrex-type glass).
• Con: Glass is very sensitive to temperature – great for temperature play if you do it correctly (warm or cool water only) but you must be careful! You know what happens when you stick out your tongue and lick a frozen lamp pole, right? Yeah. Don’t ever freeze your sex toys for sadistic play. Don’t dunk them in boiling water for cleaning without donning silicone oven mitts or having another safe method of retrieval.
• Con: One chip and you’re done for. Yes, it can chip. It’s not something that happens easily and I’m not saying that you should only use glass sex toys in a padded room but do be careful. When you’re boiling it for cleaning, have a tea towel in the pot to protect surfaces and only do one sex toy at a time. Dishwashers are fine. I’d caution clumsy people against using a glass dildo if you’re in a room full of concrete or ceramic surfaces (in case you drop it).
• Pro: You won’t need as much lube for a clear glass (i.e. non-frosted) sex toy
• Pro: Can double as art! I’ve seen some stunning pieces that could easily sit in a china cabinet. Of course you should only do this if you’re prepared for the “Ohhh that’s pretty…..what is it?” question.

Image Courtesy of Steele Malone, manufacturers of artistic glass dilettos

Just like with any other sex toy, you should be mindful of which glass sex toy manufacturers you entrust. Not all glass toys are made from damage-resistant heat-resistant borosilicate and not all borosilicate glass toys are annealed for extra strength! This is why I personally  recommend Crystal Delights and other small manufacturers like Simply Blown and Steele Malone who all use glass-blowers and keep things simple and local⁴. I’ve also seen some very unique glass sex toys on Etsy which are made by glass artisans and can range from the mundane been-there-done-that to beautiful, original works of art.

Do you have any more questions on glass sex toys? Ask and I will get the answers!

Already familiar with the joys and beauty of glass? Tell me in comments what your most favorite pieces are!

Comments

• April 30, 2012, Wintersong writes: I've been super impressed with the quality of Crystal Delights' toys, and like you said, being able to actually *talk* to the owner is a rare benefit. My only complaint is that at the moment they don't offer a plain model of their popular butt plug, without the pretty sparkly something on the bottom. I asked about it, and was told that they don't see any market in making them without the fancy decoration, but I can think of gay men I know who'd *jump* at one (especially the smoked glass model) if it was less frilly.
• May 7, 2012, Serafina Brightside writes: Super awesome post!

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  Image courtesy of Crystal Delights

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Copyright 2008-2011 Dangerous Lilly aka This Could Be Dangerous - If you see this content anywhere else, it's been scraped illegally and without my consent. Copyright violators will be hunted down and beaten with a spiked metal ball. But since they're stupid and will include even this portion, I might as well invite you to my real sex blog where you can read about sex toys and get to know me.

Tweet this!

Everybody goes on and on about how “green” and environmentally superior rechargeable sex toys are, but I’d bet that you didn’t know this fact:

Alkaline batteries can be safely disposed of with normal household waste. Never dispose of batteries in fire because they could explode.

Due to concerns about mercury in the municipal solid waste stream, we have voluntarily eliminated all of the added mercury from our alkaline batteries since 1993, while maintaining the performance you demand. Our alkaline batteries are composed primarily of common metals—steel, zinc, and manganese—and do not pose a health or environmental risk during normal use or disposal.

It is important not to dispose of large amounts of alkaline batteries in a group. Used batteries are often not completely “dead.” Grouping used batteries together can bring these “live” batteries into contact with one another, creating safety risks.

Proven cost-effective and environmentally safe recycling processes are not yet universally available for alkaline batteries. Some communities offer recycling or collection of alkaline batteries—contact your local government for disposal practices in your area.¹

So the typical AA and AAA batteries you go through fast enough to warrant purchasing them in bulk from Costco are actually not that damn bad for the environment! I did not know this. However, rechargeable batteries – both the AA kind and the ones permanently lodged in your luxury sex toy – should be recycled. I’m betting a lot of don’t do this.

Due to the chemicals in them, you should recycle rechargeable, lithium, lithium ion, and zinc air batteries.

In addition to “traditional” rechargeable batteries like AAs or AAAs, rechargeable batteries like the ones found in everyday household items such as cameras, cell phones, laptops, and power tools should also be recycled. Look for the battery recycling seals on rechargeable batteries.

As part of our commitment to the preservation of the environment, we help fund the nonprofit Rechargeable Battery Recycling Corporation (RBRC) and its Call2Recycle® program. To find a rechargeable battery recycling location near you, visit www.call2recycle.org.²

Sex toy recycling sites have started disappearing. I read about one guy based in Tampa, Florida who had a site and the article (from 2009) stated that he was currently operating at a loss. It shouldn’t be much of a surprise then that the website named in that article is now gone. Another sex toy recycling site that seemed to be active, also around 2008-2009 appears to be defunct. LoveHoney does still run their “Rabbit Amnesty” program where they’ll give you points towards future purchases for sending them in sex toys (for some reason turning in a rabbit vibe gets you more points) to recycle. Unfortunately this is a UK site and I’m having trouble finding anything like it in the US.  Of course, there’s always going to be idiotic media bloggers who are all “Ewww recycled sex toys?? That’s so gross!!” because they’re fucking idiots who don’t even know what an anal toy is, but I digress.

So here’s the section of my post wherein I don’t have an answer and I look to geeks who are geekier than me to tell us: Let’s say we can’t find an actual sex toy recycling program. But can we remove the rechargeable battery from our high-end sex toys if we decide that they’re taking up space and we hate them and no longer use them and just want to be rid of them? I have to be honest I wouldn’t even know how to go about breaking open something like a Lelo vibrator. As much as we are given the argument that all these rechargeable sex toys are greener and better for the environment, I have to wonder about that given that 98% of the sex toy owning population doesn’t recycle their expensive toys. Let’s face it: You’re going to buy a rechargeable sex toy that you hate at some point if you haven’t already. Fuck, most of my rechargeable sex toys I’ve ended up hating or just not liking enough to use. But then again, I keep half of them for comparison purposes for future reviews and the other half of them go to new homes via the ToySwap network. But if I didn’t have those two reasons, I would most likely just toss it. And that is not green.

As I quoted from Duracell up there, the alkaline batteries actually aren’t that bad for the environment but some of those rechargeable ones really can be. Lithium-Ion/Polymer batteries are not toxic but *should* be recycled³. Upstanding companies like Lelo⁴, Fun Factory and Swan/Leaf etc use Li-Po batteries. NiCad rechargeable batteries though are bad for the environment and really must be recycled and disposed of properly. But with shady companies making sex toys out of “silicone” when it’s really a porous silicone blend, can I trust them that they’re not using a cheaper rechargeable battery on their $125 sex toy? I actually looked at the CalEx site and there are no specs there that tell me what kind of rechargeable battery is in their toys. I couldn’t find out anything on my Topco brand Climax Twist rechargeable toy. I don’t know what Vibratex is using either.

I could go on and on about more aspects of “green” and sex toys, but that’s a topic for another day. Really though I just wanted to point out that your Energizer or Duracell standard batteries are not going to turn our earth to a manky, gooey pile of decay and if you think you’re being green just by trying to choose rechargeable sex toys…..think a little harder about green aspect beyond just the battery. While no electronic item is truly green, there are varying levels of “green” and it all comes down to how the sex toys are produced. Technically if you want the greenest vibrator, you could choose a Tantus sex toy. The pure silicone is chemically inert; the vibrator portion is small and can be removed easily and replaced when the motor dies (instead of replacing the whole sex toy); the Tantus toys that use an N1 style bullet, the bigger ones that resemble the RO-80mm style, take an alkaline battery.

Want to recycle your batteries, no matter what? Go here.

Comments

• April 24, 2012, Lorelei writes: This is a great - informative post. I never know what to do with batteries, so half of my junk drawer is useless dead worn out batteries, mostly from sex toys. Then there are the toys that are screwed shut and dead from long ago that I'm too lazy (or rushed) to tool apart to fill anew. I'd say all my toys should be rechargeable, but knowing me I'd forget to plug them in.
• May 7, 2012, adriana writes: So how long before recyclable AAs, for instance, die permanently? ~ It depends. :) Here's a good answer I found at Yahoo: First of all, a rechargeable battery usually doesn't put out quite the same voltage as a good alkaline one. For most devices the difference doesn't matter much, but it is slightly less. It also won't put out this voltage constantly as long as an alkaline. The run-time of something powered by rechargeables will be shorter. You can't recharge the batteries forever. Eventually they simply stop holding a charge. (In fact, each time you recharge it, it holds the charge ever so slightly less.) Depending upon the type and size of the battery, this can be as few as 100 recharges or up to 1000. It varies this widely and there's no way to know how well your battery is going to perform, In fact, you could buy two "identical" rechargeable batteries and they could perform completely differently. Of course, he then goes on to pontificate about how toxic standard AAs are to the landfills and how our planet is going to be a gooey mess in 30 years, so he isn't 100% accurate in his answer but the part that counts is pretty accurate.

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