Dealing With Annoying Customers

Do You Carry The Yogurt With The Stuff In It?

noreply@blogger.com (Brian Inman) — Sat, 04 Jun 2011 07:06:00 +0000

Customer: (saying as embarrased) I have a problem, and my doctor said I should eat yogurt. Do you know what yogurt has the stuff in it?

Me: What do you mean stuff?

Customer: You know I have this problem, and he told me to eat yogurt with the special stuff in it.

If you aren't going to tell me you have constipation, or whatever than how do you expect me to know what you are talking about? A problem could mean anything.

Do You Carry Odwalla?

noreply@blogger.com (Brian Inman) — Sat, 04 Jun 2011 07:00:00 +0000

Customer: Do you carry Odwalla?

Me: Yes it is over in the Produce department

Customer: (gives me dirty look) Why would Odwalla be in the Produce department?

Me: It is made out of fruits and veggies.

Customer: (Coming across as sarcastic) Like where in produce would they have Odwalla?

Me: (getting an attitude that the customer thinks I am lying) It is in a cooler right next to the entrance, and the Produce department.

I hate dealing with annoying customers who ask a question, and after I tell them where it is they want to argue like I am lying to them. Why would I lie about where something is? If you don't want to believe me than look for it yourself, and don't ask where something is.

Do You Have Unsweetened Plain Yogurt?

noreply@blogger.com (Brian Inman) — Fri, 27 May 2011 02:24:00 +0000

Customer: Do you have unsweetened plain yogurt?

Me: The only plain yogurt we have is sweetened.

Customer: I used to buy this store brand of yours, but now it states sweetened plain.

Me: It is the same. They just added the word, but the recipe hasn't changed.

Customer: I know there is unsweetened yogurt.

Me: (There might be, but not one person would actually eat it if it was totally unsweetened.)

Is This The Freshest Milk?

noreply@blogger.com (Brian Inman) — Fri, 27 May 2011 02:16:00 +0000

Customer: Do you have any 2% half gallons with a fresher date than June 11th?

Me: All the half gallons on the shelf came in today, and that is over 15 days till the expiration.

Customer: (Gives me a puzzled look, and puts one in her cart)

Me: (Who can't drink a half gallon of milk in two weeks? I swear some customers really annoy me with their stupidity)

Do You Have Orange Juice With Pop?

noreply@blogger.com (Brian Inman) — Wed, 30 Mar 2011 16:54:00 +0000

Image via Wikipedia

Orange Juice with Pulp

Customer: Do you have orange juice with pop?

Me: You want orange pop?

Customer: No I want orange juice with pop?

Me: I am sorry, but I don't understand what you want.

Customer: (walks over to orange juice, and points to the word No Pulp)

Me: Oh. You want orange juice with Pulp.

Customer: Yes

Me: Here are a few that have pulp.

Do You Carry Ahmen Milk?

noreply@blogger.com (Brian Inman) — Tue, 18 Jan 2011 01:58:00 +0000

Customer: Do you carry Ahmen milk?

Me: What?

Customer: Do you carry Ahmen milk?

Me: I am sorry we don't carry Ahmen milk.

Customer: (reappears after like twenty minutes to show me Almond Milk, and that we carry it.)

Me: (If you knew how to say All-Mund I could of told you where it was!)

Where Is The Pasteurized Egg Batter?

noreply@blogger.com (Brian Inman) — Sat, 15 Jan 2011 03:01:00 +0000

Customer: Where is the pasteurized egg batter?

Me: I am not sure what you are looking for. Do you mean Egg Beaters?

Customer: Yes

Me: That is with the eggs on aisle 11.

What Is This On My Bacon?

noreply@blogger.com (Brian Inman) — Wed, 12 Jan 2011 01:22:00 +0000

Image via Wikipedia

What is this on my bacon?

Customer: Do you know anything about bacon?

Me: Yes

Customer: (grabs bag out of purse) Look at this I found on my bacon. What is it? I can't tell what it is.

Me: I don't know for sure, but I know pigs, and pork get inked with numbers.

Customer: It isn't that.

Me: (thinking to myself) Didn't you just bring it to the store because you didn't know what it was?

Me: I can let you talk to my manager, and you can fill out some paperwork.

Customer: No, I will just show the meat manager.

Me: (thinking to myself again) Why would you bring that in, and think a regular worker knows what something is in a package of bacon. Why not hop on the internet, look up the brand of the bacon, contact them about it, send them a picture, and have a real answer?

I Can't Eat All That

noreply@blogger.com (Brian Inman) — Fri, 22 Oct 2010 22:02:00 +0000

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I can't eat all that

Today as I was restocking the coupon 2lb cheese a lady comes up, and asks if I have some Pepper Jack. I tell her I was just about to stock some. I start to hand her one, and she says that is way to big. There is no way I could ever eat all that.

I tried to explain to her it was the cheapest I have seen the 2lb cheese in a long time at $3.99. She kept saying it was way too much to eat. I just want to buy a smaller package. I show her that the 8 oz package is $3.99 the same price as the 2lb, and it still didn't phase her.

She ends up taking the 8 ounce package. No wonder our economy is the way it is. People just waste money. I find it hard to believe that you couldn't eat a 2lb package of cheese. It doesn't even expire for about 6 months. Next week the same lady will be in for her 8 ounce pepper jack cheese.

Where Are The Drinks?

noreply@blogger.com (Brian Inman) — Tue, 19 Oct 2010 23:51:00 +0000

Image by Getty Images via @daylife

Where are the drinks?

Today I overheard these two young ladies talking that they were going to ask me where something was because they didn't like the other clerks answer. After hearing this I decided I would definitely point them in the right direction.

They come up to me, and ask "Where are the drinks?" No wonder they didn't like the last answer. We only carry drinks in about ten different places in the store depending on what it is.

I ask so what kind of drinks are you looking for? One of them responds "You know drinks."

I respond back that we carry many different kinds of drinks. We have cold juice, pop, teas, organic drinks, odwalla, energy drinks, milk, beer, wine, and so on. Once again there response, "We just want a small drink."

I tell them there are single serving drinks of each type, and I really need to know what they are looking for. One of the ladies says, "juice". I say the orange juice is right here on this aisle.

She responds back, "Not orange juice, but juice."

I finally realize that these two ladies were complete idiots, and must not get out much to shop because they were totally clueless white trash food stamp baby producing so I can stay on welfare moms.

I finally sent them to the other end of the store where most of the cold sodas are. It is funny the other clerk came by, and said he had to deal with the same stupidity before they came to me.

That is $10 Off

noreply@blogger.com (Brian Inman) — Mon, 04 Oct 2010 17:37:00 +0000

Image via Wikipedia

Those cookies should be 2/$6.00

Yesterday I had this guy who came through my line who definitely must not shop much. He starts giving me an attitude that after I ring up the sixth cookie he tells me they should be 2/$6.00, and not $4.99. I call to verify with the Bakery, and sure enough it is the Pumpkin cookies, and not the chocolate chip. Of course he says our sign is in the wrong place. I go on my break to look at it, and it is crystal clear that the sign is for the pumpkin cookies.

Don't worry. It gets even better. He is buying multiple packages of family pack Ribeyes. They are on sale for $4.99 a pound this week. A great price. You can get a family package of 3 steaks or so for around $15. The smaller packs of steaks are $5.99, and $6.99 a pound.

Our meat department has stickers they place on the family packs that sort of look like coupons, but they clearly state save up to $10 by buying this package compared to buying several small packages. This is where the guy says did you see those $10 off coupons on each family pack of those steaks. I tell the guy those aren't coupons, but just lets you know how much you can save by buying the family packs.

He than says he doesn't want them if they are that price. Are you kidding me? Do you really think Ribeyes are less than $5 a pound which is already a steal, and than you get $10 off of that? When is the last time you bought three ribeyes for $5?

Do I need to start holding Shopping 101 classes for all the idiots out there?

I Need Another Set Of Eyes

noreply@blogger.com (Brian Inman) — Tue, 28 Sep 2010 00:19:00 +0000

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I need another set of eyes

Today this lady was looking for the extra large eggs. I show her the extra large eggs that are on the coupon this week. She than says I guess I just needed an extra set of eyes to find them.

No you didn't need an extra set of eyes, but what you needed was to take off your sunglasses while inside the store. I know it was eighty degrees today, but that is no reason to be stupid. You know how dumb you looked when you said that?

I bet maybe you could of been able to see if you removed the sunglasses, and helped yourself.

What Should I Use For My Dry Skin

noreply@blogger.com (Brian Inman) — Sun, 26 Sep 2010 23:09:00 +0000

Image by sirwiseowl via Flickr

What Should I Use For My Dry Skin?

Today as I was headed to the time clock I was approached by a customer who wanted some help in the health and beauty section. She said she suddenly got this dry skin on her face, and regular lotion isn't helping.

She is on the first aid aisle holding a Neosporin. She begins to give me a ten minute explanation of her skin problem. Do I look like a doctor, or a dermatologist? Why do people think we know everything. Oh I forgot. I know how to cure cancer, aids, and many other diseases. I just work at a grocery store because I enjoy it.

After delaying my lunch by ten minutes I told her that Neosporin is more for faster healing of cuts, and scrapes. I suggested she get some kind of hydrocortizone cream instead because it is more for skin rashes, irritations, and other skin problems.

Hopefully it fixes her problem, but seriously she needs to go get a professional to look at it. It could be something way more serious like skin cancer.

Can You Match A Wine With My Dinner?

noreply@blogger.com (Brian Inman) — Sun, 26 Sep 2010 22:46:00 +0000

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Can you match a wine with my dinner?

Yesterday I had this young lady ask me if I could match a wine with her dinner plans. Who do I look like? Do you think every grocery clerk gets sent to Wine 101? Anyways I was upfront with her, and told her I knew nothing about wine.

She than asks why they sent me over to the wine department to help? I told her that I was the only employee available at the time, and that our wine guy actually had the day off. As you can guess she gets all pissed off, and told me we just lost a $50 sale.

Anyways about ten minutes later I get called into the managers office for giving bad customer service. I say don't put me in the situation in the first place. I get lectured about my perception, and what I should of said. Of course they tell me that, but than they will question why I didn't get my regular job done because I spent a half hour trying to help someone find a wine that they should of looked it up on the internet in the first place.

I guess my approach should of been more like I am sorry but wine isn't my expertise. I can call some other wine experts from some of our other stores, and see if they can help.

In Summary I just hate customers that expect us to know everything about the 100k items we carry in the store. Come work a day in my shoes, and see what working a real job is all about when you have to deal with annoying customers all day long.

I Was Busy

noreply@blogger.com (Brian Inman) — Sat, 18 Sep 2010 04:42:00 +0000

Image via Wikipedia

I was busy. You need to put all the groceries in my reusuable bags

Today I had to deal with a customer who really annoyed me. She had a huge cart of groceries, and she proceeds to start unloading her basket. I just finished the person before her, and said hello to her.

I start bagging her groceries as she continues to unload her grocery cart. I am on the fourth bag when she finally makes it up to me. Oh here is my bags, and you will have to repack those other ones you did already? Are you kidding me?

I told her we need the bags first thing because we bag the groceries as we scan them. I think it is pretty common sense. Anyways she gets all snippity with me like it is all my fault.

Well I hope she enjoys all her squished produce. I intentionally put heavy stuff on top of it, and sorry my thumb went through the plastic on your ground beef. I promise I washed my hands before I picked my nose earlier.

These Eggs Are Cracked Can I Get A New Dozen?

noreply@blogger.com (Brian Inman) — Fri, 17 Sep 2010 01:41:00 +0000

Image via WikipediaI hate customers that play dumb while unloading their groceries. Today this lady is putting her groceries up on the belt, and I see her grabbing the eggs.

Why would any customer wait until they are up at the checkstand to open the carton of eggs to see if any are cracked? There is no reason. Any customer that actually takes time to open to look does it while standing by the eggs on the aisle.

Don't act all surprised, and demand a new dozen of eggs when you know you checked them before you put them in your cart, but now two of them are cracked, and broken. You just put other groceries on top of them, and now you expect a fresh new dozen. It is only obvious. You aren't fooling anyone.

Where Is This?

noreply@blogger.com (Brian Inman) — Thu, 16 Sep 2010 04:26:00 +0000

Image via WikipediaToday I had this old lady that was annoying me to death. I don't mind telling someone where something is, but she went a little overboard.

At first she asked me where the flour was. A minute later she is back asking me where the jello is. Another minute she is asking me where the bread is.

Are customers that lazy that they have to ask where every single item on their list is? I really felt like telling her off, and introducing her to shopping on the internet.

After the last item she asked me I went and hid in the cooler in the back, and looked out the front window waiting for her to come by again. The look on her face when she didn't see me was priceless. I just started laughing as I watched her have to help herself.

How Am I Going To Carry My Bags

noreply@blogger.com (Brian Inman) — Thu, 09 Sep 2010 04:08:00 +0000

Image by greenhem via FlickrToday I had to deal with a jerk all pissed off that we banned using plastic bags. At first I thought he was joking, but I soon realized the guy was just being a prick about it.

He starts complaining on how is he supposed to carry the paper bags. I told him like they did for 50 years before plastic, and handles on paper bags. Grab the bottom, and start walking.

Maybe don't blame us for you not having a car, or license, but yourself. It looks like maybe you need to look in the mirror, and see why you are in the predicament in the first place.

He than says I am going to put my bags in a cart, and drop it off 2 miles up the road. I said no problem, enjoy the higher grocery prices next time you come in when we pay a third party to round up the carts in the neighborhood.

I just wanted to punch the guy. He was that annoying.

This Store Is Not Earth Friendly

noreply@blogger.com (Brian Inman) — Tue, 07 Sep 2010 01:52:00 +0000

Yesterday I overheard this conversation from two young girls a few customers back in line. It is amazing how people think.

We are currently the only grocery store in town so far to completely ban plastic bags at the checkout. Most customers are pretty happy with our decision to do it.

I said most. These two young girls were not happy. This store is so bad for the environment. How could they ban plastic bags? Paper bags are so bad, and are not earth friendly whatsoever.

Once again pretty sad since we have a college just next door, and obviously a college education hasn't helped these girls. How could you even think plastic bags are better than paper bags?

The last time I checked paper is very easily recycled, and is the number one item recycled by people. Plastic bags take 1000 years to decompose, kill wildlife, fly around everywhere, and so on.

These girls need an education on what is earth friendly, and what isn't.

Where Is The Ricotta Cheese?

noreply@blogger.com (Brian Inman) — Tue, 31 Aug 2010 01:21:00 +0000

Today as I am stocking the cottage cheese. A guy comes right up to me, and asks where is the ricotta cheese? I repeat did you say ricotta cheese? He mumbles again, and it sounds like Ricotta cheese.
He repeats again, and says are you stupid I am looking for cottage cheese. I say to him no, but are you? You have been standing right in front of it the last two minutes.

Where Is My Pants?

noreply@blogger.com (Brian Inman) — Mon, 30 Aug 2010 12:16:00 +0000

I heard a great conversation while this girl talked on her cell phone in my line yesterday. It was quite entertaining. It probably helped that she was pretty cute too.

I am pretty sure she was talking to her friend on the other end. She was talking about this guy at her house who couldn't find his pants, and decided to use her parents comforter to wrap up in. It sounded like she had a great night.

I couldn't resist talking about it once I was ringing her up. I said it sounds like you had a pretty wild, and crazy night. She goes yeah I invited my cousin over because I was bored last night, but he showed up at 4am, and than couldn't find his pants this morning.
I just laughed inside. It actually made my day.

Do You Have Teddy Bears?

noreply@blogger.com (Brian Inman) — Mon, 30 Aug 2010 00:21:00 +0000

Today this teenage girl asks me if we sell Teddy Bears. I told her yes, but a very small selection because we are mainly a grocery store. I tell her to go to aisle 19.

She responds back. I already saw those. Do you have teddy bears anywhere else in the store?

Did you not even listen to me? I told you we had a very limited selection because we are a grocery store. Yup. We are a grocery store, and we sell groceries. Amazing concept huh?

Anyways she gives me this blank look, and keeps standing there like I am going to do some magic trick, and make the teddy bear of her dreams appear.

She walks away like it is my fault. I have a crazy idea. Why not go to the Teddy Bear Workshop at the mall? They only sell teddy bears, and you can make it exactly like you want.

No That Isn't My Club Card

noreply@blogger.com (Brian Inman) — Sat, 28 Aug 2010 06:49:00 +0000

Today a lady really pissed me off. She gives me her reusuable bag, and inside is a set of keys with our stores membership card on it. I assumed since it was in the bag I figured she wanted me to use it. I scan it, and figure I am being nice.

Slam on the brakes! Why was I scanning that card? She needed to put in her phone number to get her points. She said that card does nothing.

Are people that dumb? Wake up you stupid broad! I hate to let you know but your phone number, and your savings card are the same thing. Yes, they are the same thing!

Are These Eggs On The Recall?

noreply@blogger.com (Brian Inman) — Fri, 27 Aug 2010 03:02:00 +0000

Why do customers ask such dumb questions? Do they really think we would have eggs that are included in a recall on the shelves for customers to buy? I guess they must if this guy today asked me.

I think he should go over to the deli, and get a half priced egg salad sandwich. We had all these eggs in the back from the recall, and we needed to find a way to get rid of them. Don't worry about getting Salmonella. I heard you can only get it from Salmon.

Can I Have It My Way?

noreply@blogger.com (Brian Inman) — Mon, 23 Aug 2010 18:20:00 +0000

Image via WikipediaToday while taking a trip to Burger King for lunch I was amazed at the guy ahead of me. I know at Burger King you can have it your way, but I didn't see the point of how this guy was ordering his Whopper.

He ordered his Whopper minus tomato, lettuce, mayo. Why pay the premium price for a Whopper when you can order a regular hamburger for like 79 cents if you are having everything that makes a Whopper a Whopper removed from the sandwich?

Dealing With Annoying Customers

Do You Carry The Yogurt With The Stuff In It?

Do You Carry Odwalla?

Do You Have Unsweetened Plain Yogurt?

Is This The Freshest Milk?

Do You Have Orange Juice With Pop?

Do You Carry Ahmen Milk?

Where Is The Pasteurized Egg Batter?

What Is This On My Bacon?

I Can't Eat All That

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