Joan Rivers died unexpectedly on September 4th, 2014 from complications during surgery. I was heartbroken, along with millions of her fans around the world.

My admiration for Joan Rivers goes back several decades. In the late 1980’s, Joan Rivers had a popular talk show. She brought laughter in my life at a time at a time when I was watching my Mother fade away from a debilitating  disease. I felt drawn to this Jewish Mother/comedian who found humor in everyday life.

One day, over 4 years ago, I had this overwhelming urge to write to Joan Rivers on Messenger.

I wrote:

“Many years ago when my Mother was dying and I had 4 young children to care for, it was YOU who got me through the worst of it with your wonderful humor. I remember writing you a “love” letter (before the internet) hoping it would get to you.Thank you for bringing so much sunshine into my life.”

I was so happy when hours later, I received this reply.

“Thank you, darling Debi! A pleasure and privilege!”

Less than 2 months later, Joan Rivers passed away. It was a tremendous loss to the world of comedy and to those, like me, whose lives she touched.

The post My conversation with Joan Rivers appeared first on Debi Drecksler.

When people do this, I always imagine scenarios like a stressful home life or frustrating work conditions. A person certainly can’t tell their boss to “Go stick it where the sun doesn’t shine.” I could find a dozen excuses for their lack of online etiquette but the truth is…They are just being nasty!

Can you imagine if their children or grandchildren went on their phones or laptops and read their hateful words. How would they explain their language? Would they rationalize to these impressionable youngsters that it is perfectly acceptable to curse out someone whom you don’t agree with? Would they tell them that is is justifiable to be a bully because sometimes people just need to be put in their place?

Some grownups forget that they are supposed to be role models for younger generations.

Sadly, we have created a world where bullying has become an epidemic. Children have committed suicide because they just could not cope with the hate. That is heart wrenching!!

Some people I know have walked away from social media because they just can’t stand it anymore. I respect them for their decision. Others have stayed and quietly removed themselves from any source of dissent. Others fight back because they think they can persuade the bullies to be decent human beings. That causes more stress which we all know is terrible for our health.

I like to think of myself as an Ambassador for kindness but I’m smart enough to know that some people thrive on being hateful. My goal is to reach out to people like you ( I assume you care if you are reading this) and encourage you to share this and help me spread the word…

Verbal abuse is NOT the way to make the world a better place.

The post The Epidemic of Online Verbal Abuse appeared first on Debi Drecksler.

Guess how many I heard back from?? Zero!!

Here’s the problem as I see it. Most of the companies are using women in their mid 20’s to late 30’s as their models. They are targeting this age group, trying to give them a sense of urgency about what could happen down the road if they don’t take care of their skin NOW!!! I call it the FEAR FACTOR.

I watched the most bizarre television commercial earlier today. A product was being advertised that, according to the company, reduced wrinkles on 75% of their users so…wait for it… they could delay injections. The models in the advertisement were very young. So is this company making the assumption that women are eventually going to inject their skin with something OR is this a feeble attempt to try to convince women this is what they will have to do to remain beautiful?

It was not difficult for me to understand why no one wrote back. At 68 , I am much too old for them to be interested. I am part of the invisible age group. I laugh as I write this because I belong to a private Facebook group that is filled with beautiful women in their 50’s, 60’s and older, who take their skincare seriously and are happy to share the research they’ve done and the products they find that keep their skin looking fabulous.

I believe the skincare companies are totally missing out on sales by ignoring the age group that has the most disposable income and the best reason to want to purchase products that give their skin that youthful glow.

The post Age Discrimination In The World Of Skincare appeared first on Debi Drecksler.

After publishing 555 blogs through the years, I am amazed how the world of writing has changed. Every imaginable subject on this planet is the theme of a blog. People are making their livings from blogging. Perhaps if I had decided to pursue that avenue 10 years ago, I would be writing from my laptop on some island while sipping a Pina Colada.

Instead, a decade ago, I chose to write Human Interest Stories with no hidden agenda. I’ve never tried to sell you anything or insist you believe a certain way or make you angry enough to spew some hatred at someone.

I just wanted you to read my Blogs and enjoy them.

Have a great day!

The post Ten Years of Blogging!! appeared first on Debi Drecksler.

I hate seeing people waste their money on products that are over priced and don’t live up to expectations.

I have compiled a list of products I use that are fairly priced and in some cases, are comparable to more expensive products. I am not receiving any compensation for mentioning these products.

I have been using organic Coconut Oil for many years. https://debidrecksler.com/my-skincare-secret-organic-coconut-oil/

I use it every night on my face and neck before I go to bed. If you allow it to absorb into your skin for a few minutes, it will NOT stain your bed sheets. I am 67 years old and my face has very few wrinkles. It really works!! You can find Organic Coconut Oil everywhere, even in your grocery store by cooking oils. No need to spend a fortune on night time creams that do not work!

                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                 Eye make up can cost a fortune. I found a substitute for a more expensive eyeliner which basically is the exact same thing. I found it at the Dollar Tree for $1.00. I love it!!!

I have tried dozens of different lipsticks. I found one that stays on ALL DAY through breakfast, lunch and dinner and even a few kisses. The company is Maybelline and the shades are gorgeous. I wear a beautiful red because that’s my trademark! I find it on sale everywhere makeup is sold. Just follow the ads.

Here’s a money saving tip for all those lipsticks you purchased that just weren’t the right color. DO NOT THROW THEM OUT!! They actually make great blush for your cheeks. I was sent some samples by a company that wanted my opinion on their product. They did not work for me ( very moisturizing but the lipstick only lasted a short while on my lips) SO I’ve been using them for blush and they work great!

Have you ever purchased a powdered eye shadow and shortly after your little brush ( or foam on a stick) fell apart? Most dollar stores carry a package of replacements.  Don’t throw the shadow away. Also, it is healthy to change your brushes.

I discovered that many of my favorite skin lotions contained Shea Butter. After some research, I found that I could save a bundle of money by just buying pure Shea Butter. It works wonders for your face and body. Try mixing it with Coconut Oil for a fabulous home made skin product.

I hope some of these money saving tips help your budget. I would love to hear some of the ways you’ve been saving money on makeup and skin care products.

The post Money Saving Skincare and Makeup Tips appeared first on Debi Drecksler.

Billions of people around the world tuned in to watch the latest Royal Wedding. I thought it was absolutely magnificent and like a scene out of a Hallmark Movie. Yes, I watch those movies.

I was disappointed that within minutes social media was buzzing with negativity about everything from the bride’s wedding gown to the sour expression on the Queen’s face which according to the “yenta” ( gossip) experts indicated that she was displeased with her grandson’ s choice.

THIS is what is wrong with our world today. Can’t we just be happy that two people in love decided to become life partners and wish them well?

Instead we dissect every little detail whining about the money they spent, the bride’s lack of family in attendance and the hats that blocked the views of the people behind them.

What I saw was a gorgeous bride, a redheaded groom with love written all over his face and a magnificent house of worship that took my breath away.

I saw Prince Charles stepping up to the plate to be a Father figure to the bride and a gentleman to her Mother.

Life is so much better when you choose to find the positive.

The post The Royal Wedding 2018 appeared first on Debi Drecksler.

“It’s the same school where my 2 younger siblings attend, so it will work out great to be on the same schedule and they can all come home together.”

I gave Carter a quizzical look. He realized I did not know some very important details of his life.

Here is his story:

Carter is raising two of his younger siblings who are both in elementary school. Their Mother is addicted to drugs and isn’t capable of raising her children. Carter fixed up his Granny’s old house and moved in with the children and a 19 year old sister. It took a lot of sweat and hard work but now the house is really a home. Carter belongs to a church that is like his extended family. It’s filled with mountain folk with big hearts and a willingness to lend a hand when needed. No one is judgmental about Carter’s circumstances choosing instead to support his decision to keep the family together.

Helene is Carter’s girlfriend. They’ve been dating since they were teenagers. They don’t live together because as devout Christians they are waiting until marriage. Helene accepts that married life will include living with all of Carter’s siblings. She loves the two young ones and is best friends with his teenage sister.

Carter thinks he is the luckiest guy in the world. He is excited to be getting married to Helene and having the type of life partner his Mother never had. He isn’t angry with his Mother …just sad for her.

“Our Mother missed out on so much with her terrible drug addiction. She deserved better out of life. I pray for her every day.”

A member of the church has made Carter an incredible offer. She wants this young man to take over her business when she retires. She thinks he has the potential to be very successful in life.

I believe he already is.

• Names have been changed.

The post The Siblings appeared first on Debi Drecksler.

Billy lived next door to Reggie for decades. It never occurred to either one of them that the difference in their skin color was a reason not to hang around. They enjoyed sitting outside and shooting the breeze…how the town they grew up in was getting too overpopulated with transplants who honked their horns and talked too loud. One day Reggie got really sick. It never occurred to Billy that he shouldn’t drive Reggie to all his Doctor appointments and make sure he had food in his refrigerator. That’s what best friends do. A while back, a developer came and made an offer to buy Reggie’s house. Reggie couldn’t work anymore and the offer was too good to turn down. Billy encouraged his friend to take the offer, never telling him how much he would miss him. Reggie bought a little house across town. The developer met Billy outside one day and introduced himself. He told Billy how he was going to remodel Reggie’s house and make it much nicer. Billy looked at him and said, ” Build whatever you want. If you’re going to be my neighbor, just know you’ve got big shoes to fill.”

The Lone Ranger lived up in the mountains and liked his privacy. Having served in the armed forces ( where he earned his nickname) he had experienced things that changed his outlook on life. He met a guy at the hardware store who was picking up supplies with his Dad. He knew right away there was something “off” about him…a childlike innocence in a strapping man body. The three of them struck up a conversation and as often happens in this neck of the woods, turns out they were distant cousins. Robbie asks his Dad if he could hang out with the Lone Ranger. No one objected and so began a friendship. Robbie got invited for supper often because it turns out that he loved the Lone Ranger’s wife’s cooking. A few years later, Robbie’s Dad dies and now the Lone Ranger makes sure all his needs are met. It never occurred to him that he didn’t have to do it.  As he says, “That’s what good friends do in the South.”

Benjamin and Joshua have a great friendship. Though their backgrounds are as different as night and day, they both share a strong faith in the Lord and a passion for serving their community.

Benjamin says about Joshua…” Joshua has a humbleness that drew me to him. Even Though He is a successful Man, he is a humble servant of others. I sensed this in him the first time I met him. It has been confirmed over and over the longer I have known Him. Joshua has always recognized the good in others and he makes me feel like I am much more than I could ever really be. He has been a real friend and I look forward to the future with him.”

Joshua feels the same affection in his heart for Benjamin. Though their careers and family obligations often keep them apart, when they’re together, it’s like no time has passed.

Friendships among men in the South are as steadfast as the pride in their hearts for the place they call home.

*Names of the men have been changed.

The post Friendships among men in the South. appeared first on Debi Drecksler.

Sadly, we have become a society where many people walk around with their heads down in their phones, barely noticing their surroundings. They go shopping and pay no attention to the people around them because their phone beeps. They don’t smile or make eye contact with the cute baby in the cart ahead of them. They rush through transactions hardly acknowledging the cashier. Responding to strangers on the internet has replaced human contact.

I try very hard NOT to fall into this category because after writing hundreds of columns about nice people…I know the power of kindness.

I SEE the surprised look on the cashier’s face when I ask her how her day is going…and notice how she happily greets her next customer. I SMILE at a stranger on the street…and notice when they return the smile.   I WAVE at the guy in the car who stops at the pedestrian crossing  … and notice his pleasant reaction.  I make the baby giggle looking over his Mother’s shoulder as she pays for her purchases… and notice how appreciative she seems.

We hold SO much power in our words, expressions and gestures of kindness. It doesn’t take much effort to put some happiness in another person’s life. You don’t even have to speak their language.

You just have to reach out and share a little piece of your heart.

The post The Power Of Kindness appeared first on Debi Drecksler.

I found the blog interesting because I had just finished reading an article about how my generation raised our children to think very highly of themselves. We bent over backwards to fill them with self esteem. The author of the article thinks we overdid it.

Back to the Mother in law blog. Honestly, it irritated me because on my Facebook page I can list several dozen friends who I think are the most amazing Mother in laws and Grandmothers.

I know of at least 10 women who fly great distances regularly to visit their child, the child’s spouse and grandchildren. There is nothing they wouldn’t do for them. In simple language…They adore them.

I know of four women who sold their homes and moved to be closer to their offspring and their family.

My newsfeed is filled daily with beautiful photos and positive stories about Mother in laws who think the world of their daughter in laws and son in laws.

I have a neighbor who happily looked forward to retirement. Instead her daughter in law decided she should babysit the granddaughter on a daily basis. After 35 years working in daycare she really looked forward to adult stimulation. Will she say anything? No…She doesn’t want to upset her daughter in law.

So I think the young writer has this backwards. We, the Mother in laws, are not the problem. If anything, we keep our mouths shut regardless of what we might be thinking because we want good relationships with our children’s spouses.

I remember taking a walk with my first born son before he married his college sweetheart. I told him, ” I know you and I are very close but this woman you are marrying will now become the most important person in your life. Always make her #1. ”

So to all the Mother in laws out there. I think you’re quite terrific. I hope you’re receiving lots of hugs from your children and their spouses for the time and energy you give them.

And keep posting those happy photos.

The post A Shout out To Mother in laws everywhere appeared first on Debi Drecksler.