DeRamos.org Webcomic

Webcomic #006b: Aerosmith?

2009-11-10T02:27:00.000-08:00

"Did you hear the brainnn...???" asks the zombie bride. "Steven Brainnn... of Aero-brainnn... has left the brainnn...!!!"

"It seems like he is on course for a yearlong stint at Caesar's Palace: 'Steven Tyler Sings Diane Warren.' Blah," sardonically replies a priestly Vampire Lord.

"This is my cameo appearance," says Justine the Last Human-Human. She's really not important for this particular sequence of illustrations.

The Vampire Lord continues his anti-Aerosmith comedic rant: "If the band is looking for a new lead singer, they should hire an actual forty year old woman with highlights in her hair." (By the way, children's show Sesame Street turns 40.)

"Ha ha brainnn...!!! I cannot stop brainnn...!!!" laughs the zombie bride, before spitting acid onto the zombie groom's face.

Comments are closed, but you can reach the author on Twitter: @DeRamos (please follow!).

Webcomic #006a: Zombie Wedding!

2009-11-09T00:00:00.000-08:00

"Dearly be-blah. We are gathered here to-blah. In the blah-dee-blah. To join together Blah and Blah. In Unholy Blah," declares the officiating Vampire Lord. Blah.

Why am I a brides-brainnn...??? wonders a male hospital gown zombie. More amazing is the fact that this zombie can think quietly!

"Where's your brainn...???" asks the zombie groomsman to the best zombie (in boxer shorts).

"I'm wearing a bow-brainnn...!!!" the best zombie reasons.

"I'm not a fan of these bridesmaid dresses," says the ever-so-sneaky Justine, posing as a zombie bridesmaid in an orange dress.

She's speaking to her talking shotgun, who replies with the obvious: "ORANGE!" The shotgun also shoots one of the zombie bridesmaids.

After much formality, the zombie bride and zombie groom conclude, "I brainnn...!!!"

"You may now kiss the blah."

The zombie bride dissolves her new zombie husband's face with some acid.

Comments are closed, but you can reach the author on Twitter: @DeRamos (please follow!).

Sneak Peek Sunday: Webcomic #006

2009-11-08T06:55:00.000-08:00

~~It's a~~ ~~nice day~~ WHAT A HORRIBLE NIGHT ~~for a~~ TO HAVE A ~~white wedding~~ ZOMBIE WEDDING!

Comments are closed, but you can reach the author on Twitter: @DeRamos (please follow!).

First 25 Words of θəwəməθy (DeRamosh), a #NewLanguage

2009-11-07T00:00:00.000-08:00

We're using the Swadesh list to come up with the first 207 words or so in DeRamosh. Before we start, here are the letters of this new language's alphabet: ə þ θ w y m.

ə = All vowels are schwas.
þ = Plosives are rarely used (only for curse words); spit.
θ = th sound.
w = w sound.
y = consonant-y sound.
m = m sound.
No hard consonants, like k.

Without further ado, the first 25 (26 words plus two phrases, really):

I = əyə /uh-yuh/
you (singular) = yəə /yuh-uh/
he = yə /yuh/; she = θə /thuh/; it = əθ /uhth/
we = wə /wuh/
you (plural) = yəə θəwə /yuh-uh thuh-wuh/ for two; yəə əww /yuh-uh oh/ for three or more.
they = θəyə /thuh-yuh/
this = yəθ /yuhth/
that = θəθ /thuhth/
here = yəwə /yuh-wuh/
there = θəwə /thuh-wuh/
who = wəyə /wuh-yuh/
what = wəyəθ /wuh-yuhth/
where = wəyəwə /wuh-yuh-wuh/
when = wəyəm /wuh-yuhm/
how = yəw /yoh/
not = məθ /muhth/
all = əww /oh/
many = məməyə /muh-muh-yuh/
some = θəmə /thuh-muh/
few = θəw /thoh/
other = əθəw /uh-thoh/
one = əm /uhm/
two = θəwə /thuh-wuh/
three = θəwəə /thuh-wuh-uh/
four = θəəw /thuh-oh/

Hmm...this linguistic evolution has created new sounds! Apparently ə + w, when spoken together, makes a long-o sound, as in Oh! and boat.

We'll have to figure out stressed syllables (and perhaps, musical syllables), when we have homonyms and homophones. With five (out of six) letters; it's bound to happen.

Comments are closed, but you can reach the author on Twitter: @DeRamos (please follow!).

Webcomic #005e: Boredom

2009-11-06T00:00:00.000-08:00

"Boredom is for children," declares our Last Human-Human heroine, wearing a red dress.

"But there's nothing to do!" complains our werewolf-during-the-full-moon hero. They are in the midst of a bumpin' full moon party.

"There's always something to do!" she says.

"That's what she said," he mockingly adds.
Unfazed, Justine continues: "My 'to do' list is so long, I can't get to do what I want to do."

"That's what she said!" the wolf exclaims, laughing hysterically.

Trying to explain, she says, "There are a couple of classic vinyl albums waiting for me to spin."

"You totally walked into that one!" comments a brown-furred wolf passing by.

"I can't stop laughing!" says our werewolf hero, before vomiting on the ground. Relieved, he continues: "All right; I'm done."

"That's what she said," she says, having the last word of the week.

Comments are closed, but you can reach the author on Twitter: @DeRamos (please follow!).

Webcomic #005d: Buyer's Remorse

2009-11-05T00:00:00.000-08:00

We are still at the full moon party for werewolves. That mysterious Golden Voice appears once again, speaking to the assembled party crowd, asking them a question: "Aap kyaa pinaa chahate hai?"

"Beer!" exclaims a blonde wolf.

"Diet cola!" answers a raven-haired one.

"Apple juice!" a brunette requests.

"Zombie blood!" cries our hero werewolf.

"Brainnn...!!!" says a party-crashing zombie. Apparently, Deus ex Webcomica has come through again. Our hero attacks and drinks from the zombie.

"Oh, you're asking us what we want to drink!" realizes our monolingual heroine Justine, the Last Human-Human on Earth. She can't really understand any languages other than English, but at least she can decipher things by context.

"A-woo! Zombie blood!" howls our hero.

A brunette wolf comes between our hero and his human-human companion. "Excuse me. Coming through," the wolf politely says. "Thanks."

Our hero didn't think it through when he ordered his drink. "Uh-oh," he says, before vomiting the entire night onto the ground.

"This beer is awesome!" exclaims the blonde who ordered a beer previously.

Our hero comes to a conclusion: "I have buyer's remorse."

Comments are closed, but you can reach the author on Twitter: @DeRamos (please follow!).

Webcomic #005c: The Bad Guy's Head Disintegrates. The End.

2009-11-04T03:21:00.000-08:00

"We need to do something about the Vampire Lord's army of ghouls," determines Justine the Last Human-Human on Earth.

"I have an idea!" exclaims her werewolf companion. "I will find a powerful object and imbue myself with its power."

"I don't know..."

"Then I will know what the undead are thinking, so that we can defeat them once and for all!" he posits.

WARNING! POP CULTURE SPOILERS AHEAD!

"This could wind up like the ending to three of the four Indiana Jones movies," Justine suggests.

"How so?"

"The bad guy ultimately gets first crack at the magical treasure," she explains, "Then the bad guy or bad girl's head disintegrates. The end." Sure enough, the wrath of the Ark of the Covenant, the fake Holy Grail, and that weird alien knowledge thing involved some form of cranial disintegration.

A disappointed werewolf retorts, "Well, what's your plan?"

Comments are closed, but you can reach the author on Twitter: @DeRamos (please follow!).

Webcomic #005b: Not a Political Party

2009-11-03T03:48:00.000-08:00

"The outcome of an upcoming New York election will determine if the far right movement has taken over the Republican Party," hypothesizes a silver-furred female werewolf.

"I thought the Republican Party was already to the far right!" quips a brunette wolf woman.

"Ladies! This is a party-party, not a political party!" protests our werewolf hero. "We're supposed to party...LIKE A BOSS." Like the SNL digital short, boss is pronounced "bowse."

A party-crashing zombie shakes his head. "That's an old brainnn...!!!" he heckles.

Our hero continues his parody-of-a-parody flow: "Bite a zombie...LIKE A BOSS. Howl at the Moon...LIKE A BOSS. Feel sick...LIKE A BOSS. Throw up...LIKE A BOSS."

"You probably shouldn't watch the 'Throw it on the Ground' one," observes Justine the Last Human-Human on Earth.

Comments are closed, but you can reach the author on Twitter: @DeRamos (please follow!).

Webcomic #005a: Full Moon Party

2009-11-02T02:58:00.000-08:00

It's a full moon party tonight! Werewolves are everywhere!

The night of a full moon reminds me how alone I really am, Justine the Last Human-Human on Earth thinks to herself. Tonight, all humans turn into werewolves, except me.

"Are you narrating something in your head?" asks her werewolf companion. It's only his second appearance in this webcomic, so he still lacks a name. And he should have a cool name (or a devastatingly lame name, which is cool).

Ignoring the wolf's question, Justine continues her reminiscence: There was a zombie pandemic, and a minor vampire outbreak. These undead conditions spread exponentially around the globe. Mysteriously, those not infected by the undead became mutated with lycanthropy.

"Another shot of silver tequila! A-woo!" triumphantly howls an inebriated wolf. His fellow celebrants howl as well.

These people are susceptible to the undead every day, and most nights.

"You're thinking about me, aren't you?" he slurs. He's about to vomit.

The light of the full moon gives these werewolves immunity against all ghouls.

The werewolf vomits.

Tonight is a global celebration!

Accepting being ignored, the werewolf declares, "I'm gonna go to the bar to get more booze!" He asks his date politely, "Do you want anything?"

Justine's werewolf is a fun guy.

Comments are closed, but you can reach the author on Twitter: @DeRamos (please follow!).

Sneak Peek Sunday: Webcomic #005

2009-11-01T01:10:00.000-07:00

Every full moon, all humans on Earth (except one) turn into werewolves. Then they party all night long. This is their story.

If only we non-webcomic humans can do the same...

Comments are closed, but you can reach the author on Twitter: @DeRamos (please follow!).

Happy Halloween!

2009-10-31T04:31:00.000-07:00

In case you can't see the image, it's a rather nonsensical depiction of all characters thus far (and variations thereof) from the DeRamos.org Webcomic. They (and we) are wishing you all a Happy Halloween. They are, after all, werewolves, zombies, a vampire, and the Last Human-Human on Earth (times three).

We might do this again for Christmas!

Comments are closed, but you can reach the author on Twitter: @DeRamos (please follow!).

Webcomic #004e: Free Will Is Right Now

2009-10-30T02:11:00.000-07:00

Referring to all the delays within the time-loop that is this week's webcomic, the Vampire Lord laments, "If I had you the first time, we would not have to play this game again and again."

Justine the Last Human-Human on Earth, and amateur philosopher, contradicts her attacker (or suitor?): "There is no 'what if...?'. There is only 'what now...?'."

"Here we go again," complains the vampire, rolling his red eyes. "Blah."

"You can't change the past, and the future has already been written," the woman waxes wisely.

"Oh, look at the time. I must head home now. Blah," declares the Vampire Lord before vanishing, leaving his potential victim alone to continue her virtuous verbiage.

"All we have is right now. The present is the only time when we get to choose. The possibilities of the present are real."

At this time, a zombie tries to sneak up on Justine because her philosophic brain seems delicious.

"Right now, I freely decide whether or not to shoot this zombie," the woman says, "but when the moment has passed, I will have done what I was supposed to do all along."

She shoots the zombie.

Realizing this predisposition to fate might encourage apathetic fatalism, Justine clarifies her rant: "However, believing in fate does not excuse me from my chosen actions, nor should it inspire indifference. Free will is right now."

Comments are closed, but you can reach the author on Twitter: @DeRamos (please follow!).

Webcomic #004d: Deus ex Webcomica

2009-10-29T04:26:00.000-07:00

"I want to suck your blood," says the Vampire Lord to his next victim. "That is a w, not a v. I am not a stereotype," he clarifies. "Blah."

That potential victim is Justine the Last Human-Human on Earth. She begins tries to distract the easily-distracted Nosferatu, saying, "Well..."

"No more delays."

Our heroine is screwed. (But not in that way, since this is a family webcomic. With zombies. And blood.)

"Your blood, I shall suck," the Vampire Lord muses. "Like a milkshake. I drink your milkshake. I drink it up. Blah." (OK, maybe this webcomic is full of naughty double entendres, after all.)

"Dobro jutro!" greets the Mysterious Golden Voice to the Vampire Lord and Justine.

"No, my Lord. You are mistaken. It is still nighttime here," protests the vampire.

"Sunce!" declares Deus ex Webcomica (which is the only feasible explanation for this Golden Voice), pointing to the sunrise.

His plan for human extinction thwarted once again, the vampire has had enough. "I give up. Blah."

"Thank you, Mysterious Voice, but I don't understand a word you say!" exclaims the woman.

"You should learn another brainnn...!!!" advises a zombie in bedclothes.

"I definitely should!" she agrees.

"Da," affirms Deus ex Webcomica. They have reached consensus.

"It's on my 'To Do' list," Justine somewhat promises.

Comments are closed, but you can reach the author on Twitter: @DeRamos (please follow!).

Webcomic #004c: Halloween in 3, 2, 1...

2009-10-28T03:33:00.000-07:00

Sensing his final victory over humanity at hand, the Vampire Lord declares, "At last, there will be no more human-humans on Earth. Blah."

Trying to delay the inevitable again, Justine (the Last Human-Human on Earth, incidentally) asks, "So...what are you going to do for Halloween?"

"Oh, no, you cannot do this. Fool me once, aah, shame on you." Some vampires like numbers, and our Vampire Lord is one of them. So he continues: "Fool me twice, aah aah, shame on me."

This goes on for six more hours. "Fool me eight hundred and eighty-eight times, aah aah aah, shame on all the creators of all the inside jokes in the world."

"It's sunrise."

"I have been thwarted again. Blah."

Now that the main dramatic tension of this particular webcomic is resolved, we apparently are in an anticlimactic state. And so begins an ambiguous filler conversation between a zombie and our heroine:

"I am going to be a brainnn... for Brainnn...!!!" proudly declares the zombie.

"That's a great costume idea!" (This makes sense if you can understand what "brainnn..." means by context.)

"You should go as Brainnn...!!!"

"I'll think about it."

Comments are closed, but you can reach the author on Twitter: @DeRamos (please follow!).

Webcomic #004b: Pearl Jam Concert

2009-10-27T08:36:00.000-07:00

"Speak your last words, mortal, while you still can," the Vampire Lord commands. "Blah."

"I heard you went to a Pearl Jam concert earlier this month," states Justine the Last Human-Human on Earth, with an ace up her sleeve. "How was it?" (She's not wearing sleeves.)

"As always, they played an epic show."

"Details, please!"

"You can't beat an energetic main set plus two encore sets." And with that, the Vampire Lord talked about a two-hour concert over the course of six hours.

"...and after 'Yellow Ledbetter,' guitarist Mike McCready played 'The Star-Spangled Banner' like Jimi Hendrix," says the Vampire Lord, concluding his all-night fanboy rant.

"That is neat," reacts Justine, as the sun rises. "The sun is rising! You should go to bed!"

"Blah," resigns the Vampire Lord, not wanting to turn into dust. He quickly makes his escape. (Didn't he have the upper hand earlier?)

"Good brainnn...!!!" says a friendly zombie, out for a morning jog.

"Good morning to you, too!" replies a jovial Justine, shooting the zombie (with kindness, of course!).

"Would you like to eat brainnn...???"

"Yes, breakfast sounds good."

You can read the author's recollection of the aforementioned Pearl Jam concert (with Ben Harper and Relentless7) at Auderamos.

Comments are closed, but you can reach the author on Twitter: @DeRamos (please follow!).

Webcomic #004a: Bloody Dancing

2009-10-26T19:24:00.000-07:00

"Let us dance," says the Vampire Lord to the Last Human-Human on Earth. "Blah."

They dance into the late hours of the night. Swept off her feet, Justine exclaims, "I don't want this to end!" which ignites the Vampire Lord's fear of commitment. (Alternatively, the sun is rising, and the Vampire Lord does not want to be reduced to ashes at first light. I'd say it's both his fear of commitment and of annihilation.)

"I totally forgot I have things to do. Deadlines, you know. I must leave. Blah," he says, dropping the woman to the floor.

"Ouch!" Justine is knocked unconscious.

Later that morning, Justine awakens and wonders out loud, "How long was I out?" Shooting down a zombie that tried to sneak up on her, she sighs, "Not long enough."

Now that the long night is over, Justine hears an inner growling. "I'm hungry," she says.

Comments are closed, but you can reach the author on Twitter: @DeRamos (please follow!).

Sneak Peek Monday: Webcomic #004

2009-10-26T03:17:00.000-07:00

This sequence continues last week's vampire cliffhanger. Sneak peeks are usually on Sunday, but this action-packed installment is worth the wait, I'd say.

Comments are closed, but you can reach the author on Twitter: @DeRamos (please follow!).

Alphabet of the New Language DeRamosh #newlanguage

2009-10-25T22:48:00.000-07:00

It's been a while since I've blogged without producing a webcomic, and this one's going to be hilarious (for me, anyway)! At the risk of giving away too much information (in a TMI sort of way), this morning in the bathroom, it occurred to me come up with a "new language," or rather speed up the evolution of the English language (among other languages) to a state of simplicity, softness, and strangeness.

It starts with the alphabet and basic phonemes. As babies, so it is said, we can and do speak every possible human sound. This ability is lost when we learn our first language, in such that, some sounds in other languages are hard to reacquire. For a native English speaker, even the gutterals involved in a closely-related Germanic language like Dutch can be odd to reproduce with one's own vocal cords.

In any case, there are way too many characters and vocal sounds in English: Twenty-six letters (capital and small), various vowel sounds, various consonant sounds, and some relatively nasty sounds when recording on a mic (plosives and sibilants, for instance). And so I resolved to reduce the complications with this evolved, new language.

I hashed out much of this alphabet system this morning with my friend Neeru on Twitter: She asked questions; I made stuff up.

The Ground Rules (tentative):
1. All vowel sounds are schwas (ə).
2. Hard sounds, like hard-c, k, and hard-g are eliminated.
3. Historically similar consonant sounds are grouped together, and the subjectively softest sound is in the new language.
4. Plosive sounds like b and p are reserved for the nastiest of curse words. I've chosen the Thorn Rune (þ) to represent this sound, even though that symbol is used as th elsewhere. In this new language, plosives are pronounced by spitting on the person to whom you are addressing. Hence, it is nasty.
5. The consonants d and t, as well as the th sound, are consolidated as Theta (θ). The words vater, vader, and father are all the same.
6. That said, the letters f and v are now represented by the letter w.
7. Soft-g sounds like j. In Spanish, j sounds like h. In German, Dutch, and other languages, j sounds like y. All those letters are consolidated as y.
8. The letters l and r (interchangeable or even mutually exclusive in some languages) are represented by the letter w, like Elmer Fudd saying, ""Be vewwy vewwy quiet; I'm hunting wabbit." This is called a Fuddian slip.
9. The consonants m and n are too close, and one must go. Since m doesn't require your tongue against the back of your teeth like n, I chose m.
10. The letter q is now w. (Also, when in doubt, use w.)
11. Sibilants like soft-c, s, x, and z are now a lisped θ.
12. There are no capital letters.

In short, the letters of this new language are ə þ θ w y m. There are only six letters, and þ /spit/ is rarely used!

This new language is called θəwəməθy, or DeRamosh. In the DeRamosh language, θəwəməθy is pronounced thuh-wuh-muhth-y' where the y is a consonant-y that stops suddenly. It is the hardest word to say in DeRamosh, and therefore must be the first word to learn. This is how the Latin letters in English (among other languages) compare with the DeRamosh alphabet:

A = ə
B = þ
C = θ
D = θ
E = ə
F = w
G = y
H = y
I = ə
J = y
K = θ (since the hard sound of K is non-existent)
L = w
M = m
N = m
O = ə
P = þ
Q = w
R = w
S = θ
T = θ
U = ə
V = w
W = w
X = θ
Y = y (and Y as a vowel = ə)
Z = θ

We shall return to the topic of DeRamosh when I come up with a word list for the new language. I'll use the Swadesh list of 207 words, and come up with more words as the linguistic culture of DeRamosh needs a broader vocabulary. Since the language only has six characters, a lot of words will be spelled the same. I think a combination of context, body language, ad hoc sign language, and a sequence of musical notes can differentiate what would otherwise be confusing.

Yes, DeRamosh might be a sing-songy language. I'm considering using the six-note blues scale (root, minor third, perfect fourth, blue note diminished fifth, perfect fifth, and minor seventh) to convey meaning. DeRamosh can quite possibly be a very bluesy language, with phrases and sentences that sound like face-melting guitar solos.

Or maybe not. Perhaps. Who knows?

Stay tuned, and we'll keep you posted regarding the DeRamosh language. Until then, we have some silly webcomics, with #004 coming soon!

Comments are closed, but you can reach the author on Twitter: @DeRamos (please follow!).

Webcomic #003f: Computers

2009-10-24T15:31:00.000-07:00

"With the release of Snow Brainnn...and Windows Brainnn..., I am in the market for a new personal brainnn...!!!" declares the zombie wearing boxer shorts. Being a zombie, his main source of information is what the TV says, so he asks out loud: "What does the latest 'I'm a Brainnn...' ad have to brainnn...???"

The zombie imagines his master, the Vampire Lord, as the smug Mac douche and his hunter, Justine the Last Human-Human on Earth, as the dorky PC nerd.

"I am a Mac. Blah," declares the Vampire Lord. He rarely uses contractions when he speaks.

"And I'm a PC," says Justine. "Windows 7 has slightly less problems."

"OS X Snow Leopard has slightly more problems than before," says the Mac vampire.

"Then again, Vista had minimum requirements issues," continues the Windows PC woman.

"Curious about your OS X Guest Account? Well, if you forget to back up your data, do not go there yet. Blah."

Realizing that there are flaws in both of their platforms, the Windows PC wonders, "What if you install Windows 7 on Apple hardware?"

Realizing the not everyone can afford an Apple-branded computer, the Mac suggests, "You can Hackintosh a PC to save money and enter a morally ambiguous geek zone." Being vampire, the Mac likes moral ambiguity.

Suffering from a splitting headache, the zombie exclaims, "Too many brainnn...!!! I might as well buy a typewriter and some postage brainnn...!!!" The zombie's head then splits in two.

Both resigning to the fact that computers are only as good as their users, the Windows PC asks the Mac: "Do you want to be friends?"

"We both shall perpetually ignore Linux. Blah."

In the interest of full disclosure, the author owns shares in both AAPL and MSFT. He also enjoys using various flavors of Linux, on rare occasions.

Comments are closed, but you can reach the author on Twitter: @DeRamos (please follow!).

Webcomic #003e: STP Concert

2009-10-23T15:02:00.000-07:00

"I saw Stone Temple Pilots last night," triumphantly declares the Vampire Lord.

"Wow," patronizes Justine the Last Human-Human on Earth. "You've had an exciting month!"

Oblivious to her sarcasm, the Vampire Lord continues: "Yes, I went to a lot of shows and amusement this October. Blah."

"A little too many," he continues, changing his tone of voice.

"Oh, how so?" she asks.

"After too many nights of fun, my allergies act up."

"It could just be the Autumn weather," Justine assures the Vampire Lord.

"I sneeze all the time. Blah, blah, blah," complains the vampire, while the zombie eavesdrops with delight on his face. "Not to mention the occasional splitting sinus headache," he says while splitting the zombie's head. "Blah," the Vampire Lord sneezes. "Excuse me. That was a sneeze."

"Bless you," says the woman.

"Curses."

On that note, check out my review of last night's Stone Temple Pilots concert at San Manuel Indian Bingo and Casino (Highland, California) at Auderamos.

Comments are closed, but you can reach the author on Twitter: @DeRamos (please follow!).

Webcomic #003d: Dinner & Tournament

2009-10-22T03:02:00.000-07:00

"The Master and Brainnn...went to Medieval Times Dinner and Brainnn...!!!" declares the zombie in boxer shorts.

"That sounds like fun," replies Justine the Last Human-Human on Earth.

"We sat at the section of the Red-Yellow Knight," interrupts the celebratory Vampire Lord. "It was hard to pick a chant for him because there was already a Red Knight and a Yellow Knight," he continues. "Blah."

Justine asks rhetorically, "Don't red and yellow make orange?"

Unfazed, the Vampire Lord rants his reminiscence, "He seemed to be the only knight that really interacted with his 'fans.' So we screamed and shouted. Plus, the Red-Yellow Knight looked like Hugo Weaving. You know, Elrond from The Lord of the Rings movies, but with a big beard. Blah."

"It's just too brainnn...that he got his brainnn...kicked by the Yellow Brainnn...!!!" exclaims the zombie, reveling in the pretend downfall of the Vampire Lord's new hero.

Angered, the Vampire Lord cuts open the zombie's head. "Red-Yellow was the most skilled
in the real games, acted like a war general, and sold his death like a professional."

"Sounds like you have a man-crush," the woman jokes.

"Blah."

Comments are closed, but you can reach the author on Twitter: @DeRamos (please follow!).

Webcomic #003c: Disneyland

2009-10-21T13:48:00.000-07:00

"How was Disneyland?" asks the woman wearing violet.

"I didn't go to Brainnn...!!!" replies the zombie wearing boxer shorts.

"I was talking to the vampire behind me."

"It was fun. Blah," replies the vampire behind the woman. "I avoided Tomorrowland and much of Fantasyland this time around.

"Interesting."

"Instead, I went through the left side of the park, with Adventureland, New Orleans Square, etc. It was an entirely different Disneyland experience. Blah."

After some hesitation, the vampire continues: "I wish they provided free Wi-Fi Internet in the park."

"Why would you bring a brainnn...to Brainnn...???" asks the zombie, condescendingly.

"Netbooks are very lightweight. Blah," angrily replies the vampire, who quickly splits the zombie's head into two.

Returning his attention to the woman, the vampire concludes his spiel: "All in all, I had a good time. Blah."

Disneyland® is a registered trademark of The Walt Disney Company, and is obviously not affiliated with the DeRamos.org Webcomic or the webcomic's publisher DeRamos Media, which is a division of DeRamos Group LLC. The author of this webcomic had a good time there, and he imagined that the Vampire Lord of the Webcomic would have had a good time, too.

Comments are closed, but you can reach the author on Twitter: @DeRamos (please follow!).

Webcomic #003b: Fatalism

2009-10-20T00:00:00.000-07:00

"Gotcha," declares our heroine Justine, after almost-flawlessly stalking her next zombie kill.

She was almost flawless.

"Not so fast, last human-human on earth!" exclaims the Vampire Lord, who dresses almost like a stereotypical street pimp. Seriously, his shoes match his vest. And he wears a cape. "The undead belong to me," he continues.

"Son of a bitch!" exclaims Justine. She does not like getting caught in a trap, if she can help it. Whether or not she actually has the choice is the subject of this rather philosophical webcomic installment.

"This was, how you say? Meant to be. Blah."

The zombie, who was likely the bait in this situation, laughs. "Ha ha brainn...!!! I thought you believed in brainnn...!!!"

The Vampire Lord immediately complements his servant's observation: "Yes, one who believes in fate must accept this course of events. Blah." He quickly disposes of the zombie. (Remember, of the six zombies featured last week, four currently remain unharmed. Who will suffer next week?)

"I accept that whatever happens, happens, but it doesn't mean I'll like it," explains Justine. Remember, she believes in subjective, present-tense free will balanced by an objective, universal determinism. It's a bit complicated. Oh yes, Justine continues her rant with a threatening promise: "And neither will you!"

"Well, that is a bummer. Blah."

Comments are closed, but you can reach the author on Twitter: @DeRamos (please follow!).

Webcomic #003a: Baseball

2009-10-19T00:36:00.000-07:00

"The Greater Los Angeles area has a 50% chance of having at least one team make it to the World Series..." states Justine the Last Human-Human on Earth. She wears purple, combining both Dodger Blue and Angel Red, as she laments: "With the Angels' extra innings loss and the Dodgers' blowout defeat, it feels like our opportunity is slipping away...again."

A mysteriously powerful vampire appears behind our fearless heroine. "Do not lose hope. Blah," he assures her.

Laughing, a zombie provides the voice of doubt, despair, and defeat. "The World Brainnn...will be Philadelphia against New Brainnn...!!!" he predicts.

"Silence!" commands his vampire master. In anger, the vampire uses some sort of telekinetic magic to rip open the zombie's head. "Blah."

The vampire moves closer to our heroine. Justine observes, "Ironically, your breath smells like garlic."

"Blah."

Comments are closed, but you can reach the author on Twitter: @DeRamos (please follow!).

Sneak Peek Sunday: Webcomic #003

2009-10-18T05:46:00.000-07:00

Justine the last human-human on Earth's zombie-hunting travels have led her to a town called Apatin (look it up). It does not look well for our heroine, and it looks even worse for this week's zombie fatality. Yes, this week marks the arrival of a very powerful vampire (who is yet to be named), as well as the coming of situations that can easily satire various in-style vampire stories on the silver screen (as well as the small screen).

Let the blood-sucking absurdity begin! Blah.

Comments are closed, but you can reach the author on Twitter: @DeRamos (please follow!).