Yet more often than not, those items stay on our bucket lists. And we repeat the same declarations next year.

We get caught in that cycle, because we struggle to go after those dreams. And most of the time, what we struggle with the most is the first step.

That first step towards our dreams is always the scariest and toughest. That first step comes with uncertainty. It comes with the possibility of failure and rejection. It means putting ourselves and our dream on the line.

Yes, it’s scary. Our dreams mean a lot to us, which makes it even scarier. But that fear doesn’t have to get in the way of us taking that first step, and there are things we can do to make that first step less scary. Here are three.

1) Surround yourself with the right people

No matter how good you are at facing and overcoming your fears, there will always be times when you get to the edge, and can’t quite seem to take the leap. I’ve been there myself. During those times, it really helps to have people who will push you and support you. For me, that was often my business coach Ishita Gupta. For you, it might not have to be a coach. Maybe it’s a best friend, or your spouse or your family. But it’s important to have that community around you – people who inspire you and push you and make you feel safe and comfortable enough to go for anything. Find those people, hold on to them.

2) Break down your goal into the smallest steps

I’ve played piano since I was 4, and guitar since I was 14. And I’d always dreamed of having my own concert and performing on stage. So, when I was 18, I decided I would make that happen. And as you can imagine, I was terrified. I wasn’t sure if I could do it. It was a huge, scary, daunting dream to go for. So, I broke it down into smaller steps. First, I needed songs. That was easy. I planned a set list, with some covers and some of the songs I wrote. Next, I needed a location. Finding and renting a concert hall cost a bit of money, but was doable. Third, I needed people. I started by inviting all my friends and family. But I also wanted to get people who I didn’t know to come. So I created some flyers (again, not a hard thing to do), printed a couple of hundred and distributed them on the streets. This last step was hard and scary. Especially for me, because I’m an introvert at heart, and it’s really scary for me to approach strangers on the street. But that was all I had left to do. Instead of the original goal of “hold a concert”, I now had a much simpler goal of “distribute 200 flyers”. I managed to do that in the space of 4 hours.

When you break down your goal into the smallest possible step, it becomes much less daunting. And as you make progress, and take one small step at a time, you’ll gain more and more momentum and confidence – and be able to keep going further.

3) Practice doing scary things

Here’s some bad news: that fear is never really going to go away. Fear will always be there. We’re human, it’s natural. All we can do is get better at not letting that fear hold us back from our dreams. We can learn to let that fear guide us, and to dance with it – instead of letting it stop us. That’s a skill – and like any skill, you get better at it with practice.The more you do the things that scare you, the better you’ll get at it. And I’m not talking about skydiving and bungee jumping (though those are all well and good). I’m talking about the things that bring about fear of rejection and failure. Reaching out to someone you’ve always admired. Sharing your thoughts and opinions with the world. Taking on projects that might not work.

Because the things that mean the most, and have the biggest impact – our dreams – often are things that might not work. But they’re still worth pursuing anyway.

But for me, it was. I grew up with it. I always thought that it was just a normal reaction to exercise – part of breathlessness and tiredness.

It made me realize just how much of our experience in the world is coloured by our own past and history. Other people, with other experiences and histories, see and experience the world in completely different ways

There really isn’t any “normal”. There’s normal for us – based on what we’re used to seeing in the world. What we can do is recognize that, embrace it – and try to see what other people see, in order to understand how they experience the world.

It’s important to note that the evolution started with destruction – loss of syllables of “hoc die” to “hodie” to hui”. Only from that point of destruction, did the combination of other things take place and lead to the creation of a new word.

Creation and destruction often go hand in hand.

We see this everywhere.

Sculptures come from chiseling away blocks of stone, so that what remains is a beautiful work of art.

Cooking happens only after you cut off a part of a plant or animal, and place it over heat to break it down further. Once it’s broken down, that’s when the flavors come alive and fuse with other ingredients. But it starts from breaking down your ingredients first.

If we want to create – to make something beautiful, different, new – often, we have to start from breaking down what’s already there.

If you live each day like it’s your last, there’s no room for growth. There’s no place for learning and improving, for practice, for small consistent actions that will make an impact in the long run. And those are the things that will truly get you where you want to be.

So don’t live each day like it’s your last. You have a tomorrow (and a next month and a next year) to build towards. But live each day like it matters – because it does.

But that’s not what following your passions is truly about. Passion isn’t about the things that are fun. It’s about doing work that gives you meaning, that resonates with you, that you value.

Your passions aren’t the things you enjoy or are interested in. Your passions are the things that you love so much that you can’t stop thinking about them and want to push yourself to constantly get better at.

Those are the paths you should follow. Not just the ones that are fun and enjoyable.

You could open a McDonald’s. You don’t need much culinary skill or training. You just pop the patties on the grill or the fries in the fryer, and wait for the timer. Just follow their system, repeat the steps, and voila. You’ll be serving fast, reasonable burgers at a cheap price, with plenty of customers, pretty soon. You won’t win any culinary awards. Nobody’s going to say you have the best food in the world. But you can be pretty confident you’ll have customers, you’ll meet their expectations, and you’ll have a good business.

Or you could be a chef. Invest in learning the art of cooking. Create food that expresses yourself on a plate. Food that evokes emotions, speaks to people, and represents you. It might not work. Some people might hate it. It will take more time to learn. But some people might love it, and love you. And it’s the only way you can create food that really touches people and changes their lives and that people travel the world to try.

Both paths can lead to success. But only one can lead to art.

True art, art that touches people and changes their lives, can’t be made by following paint-by-numbers systems or templates, even if those systems are created by experts. It requires your personality and your heart. You need to have passion, and belief in yourself, and do things your way. It’s scarier, and riskier. But that’s the only way to truly touch people.

If you just want to make decent money, and create stuff that people will consume and pay for and be okay with, then by all means. Find a proven step by step system and follow it.

But if you want to change lives, inspire change, and create work that speaks to people and that you’re proud of, then you have to be you. Learn from experts and proven systems, sure. But don’t be afraid to break the rules, step out, and put your personality into your work.

one of the most common arguments i see against the idea of doing what you love is that doing what you love may not be practical. and the common recommendation is that instead of pursuing your passions, you should start off going where your skills are – to think about what you’re good at that the world would value and pay you for.

But here’s the thing. The two aren’t mutually exclusive. 20 years ago, perhaps. But the world has changed, and so have the opportunities.

The internet has changed the equation for doing what you love.

Before the internet, you had to start off where your skills were. You were mostly limited to working with people within your city. So, you had to figure out how to fit the needs of those people.

The internet has caused 2 big changes, though.

Firstly, it’s made it easier than ever to improve your skills. “What you’re good at” is more fluid than it’s ever been. There are online courses on every subject, from card magic to sales to comedy. Whatever it is you’re passionate about, there are more opportunities than ever to get good at it. And if you’re truly passionate about something, you’d want to get good at it.

Secondly, and more importantly, you’re not longer limited to geographical restrictions. You can now work with almost anyone in the world. This means that you have a much wider range of needs you can solve. And no matter what your passion is, there are probably some people, somewhere in the world, who have needs that your passion fits.

When there’s an unlimited range of needs you can fulfill, you don’t have to start from the need. You can start from what lights your fire – and find the people with needs that your fire can solve.

In today’s world, the question isn’t whether you should do what you love or do what you’re good at that the world needs. The question now is: what are you passionate enough about, that you’ll 1) push yourself to become great at, and 2) connect with the people who need it.

It’s extremely risky. Often, doing what you love means taking a risk. You’ll have to step out of your comfort zone, and try new things. You have to put yourself out there and risk rejection. You may have to risk losing money, even.

The people closest to you may not understand what you’re doing or why you’re doing it. Your friends and family want the best for you, but they can’t feel the passion you feel. Your passion is your own, and it’ll be hard for those around you to see what you see and understand why it matters so much to you. They’ll tell you to be more realistic and practical.

The money may not follow. In fact, it probably won’t. You can probably make money it at – but you’ll have to work hard at it, it’s not going to just follow.

The world may not appreciate it. There are going to be lots of people who disagree with your choices and the work you create. You’re going to get criticized, maybe even ridiculed.

But here’s why you should do what you love. All those things could happen anyway. And your choices and journey would be so much more meaningful (to you) when you’re doing what you love.

The chef creates based on what he knows believes in, because he trusts his abilities and his instincts.

It might seem arrogant (and perhaps even selfish). Some people say they’d hate to go to restaurants like that. But it really isn’t. It’s about the belief that your vision will provide the best experience – beyond anything the customer could imagine for themselves.

Sometimes, that’s the best way to provide the best experience – both for you, and for the people around you. When you try to listen too much to those around, you risk diluting your own vision, and losing the impact.

When you do things your way, you’re able to go in a direction that you fully believe in and are passionate about. And because of that, the results are going to be better.

“Do what you love and the money will follow”

As any struggling artist proves, this is clearly false. There are plenty of people who are doing what they love, but never make money. But here’s why I believe you should do what you love anyway: because the money isn’t going to follow either way. Whether or not you’re doing what you love, money isn’t going to just magically appear. It’s going to take time and effort, you’re going to have to put yourself out there, and go get it. But if you’re going to put in the effort anyway, you’re better off spending the effort doing something you love and are passionate about, don’t you think?

This brings me to the second myth that I see everywhere online:

“Do what you love and you’ll never have to work a day in your life”

Doing what you love still takes work. In fact, it probably would require you to work even harder. It’s going to mean so much more to you, so it’s going to be scarier. You’ll have to put so much more of your heart into it. And don’t listen to anyone who says it doesn’t feel like work. It’s so much more emotionally draining. When you’re just counting the hours in a job you hate, it’s easier to disconnect. It’s easier to leave at 5, and leave all the work in the office, and not worry about it. But if you’re doing something you love, you can’t disconnect from it. It’s going to be on your mind all the time. You’ll be constantly thinking of ways to do it better. It’s a struggle. And it’s tough. But it’s much more meaningful.

“If you don’t build your dream, someone else will hire you to build theirs”

There seems to be this train of thought these days that says everyone needs to build their own business and work for themselves. But here’s the thing: not everyone dreams of being an entrepreneur. And not everyone is meant to be an entrepreneur. It’s okay if your dream is to work in a company, doing something that you find meaning and joy in.

So, what is true about doing what you love? I love this quote by Brian Tracy:

“If you do what you love and commit to being the best in your field, you will find success”

Doing what you love is great. And it can bring you lots of fulfillment and meaning. But alone, it’s not enough. You still need the second part of the equation. You need to put in the work, and commit to being the best. If you do that, though, whatever field you’re in, you can succeed.

“Do what you love” isn’t the end point. It’s the starting point of the journey. You still have to walk down the road – and it’s a tough one. But it’s so much more meaningful.

For more insights on the challenges and fears that come with doing what you love – and how to overcome them – check out PassionBlueprint. I talk to amazing people who have done just that, so you can learn to do the same.