It is so hard for us to see where we came from, why we are here and where we are going after. Many people will never be able to comprehend it because their eyes have been blinded.

Do you know why it is important to take that step toward a relationship with God?

Because with Christ all things are possible.  He is our Heavenly Father. Just like you know what is best for your children, He, above all else, knows what is best for you. We humor Him, we sadden Him, we fill Him will pride and we do things that cause us not to hear from Him. We all are given freedom to choose the path that we have, hopefully, prayerfully considered. Who is to say the path you are on is wrong for long or wrong at all?

I was with God before I was given clothes to cover this soul. He put breath in my body to come alive and find the way back to Him. This life I live is not to be selfish and see how many materialistic things I can get. To be better than the Jones next door. To have the biggest diamond engagement ring. To have the biggest house in the best neighborhood. To drive the fanciest car. My life is to be reconciled to my God because I am going to be back with Him again and it will be for eternity.

It’s hard for people to fathom how to have a relationship with someone you can’t see. Heck, it’s hard to communicate with people that are right in front of you. But with Heavenly Father, He knows your heart. He sees the pain, the fear, the insecurity, the rejection, the love, the caring spirit, the anger, the self pity, the happiness, the joy, the confusion and so much more that we encounter every second of every day. Whether you know it or not, your life and who you really are can be masked to the people around you but to God, you are an open book. He sees all. So, with the Creator of YOU, for the first time you can truly be yourself and someone loves who you are deep within your soul. You can’t fool Him or keep secrets from Him. So, when you have all these feelings you have the only One you can go to who will help you through it all and that is your Heavenly Father.

I have gone through many religions trying to find the right one for me. I have taken something positive from each one that has made me into who I am now. There have been many things I have heard that have grieved my Spirit and made me cry for those who remain in bondage to man. I have always felt that the Church today is not what God intended it to be. Three weeks ago I came to a point in my life where I no longer would search. I knew of nothing else that could be out there to stop my search. I know within my heart that God saw my hope start to dim. Then he placed me in someone’s hands and despite the attraction he took a leap of faith and shared his testimony. What I heard was something that brought light back to my Spirit. It was a jolt of electricity and like the energizer bunny, I was moving full steam ahead. I couldn’t slow down. I was excited and in my excitement I couldn’t slow my investigation.

In my research, not from the internet but from words given from God, I prayed for wisdom and guidance and read accounts that were beliefs I have told myself in my journey thus far. For the first time, I was reading the questions of someone other than myself, though they were my exact thoughts. If I would have done this years ago, I wouldn’t have been ready for the commitment I am making. I had to experience what I have in my life to get me where I am now.

Since I have been consumed with building a true relationship with God, I have lost my job, lost someone special, lost security in my home, lost my means of transportation. I have been tested with trial upon trial but I have peace. My brother told me that being Optimistic really wins. So, by losing my job I have been blessed with having my Real Estate license re-activated and I have faith the clients will start calling. By losing someone special no one can say I do the things I do because of that person. I am on my own but God is carrying me. By losing security in my home I have learned that it isn’t good to let Facebook know when you are out of town and I am being blessed with a better door and storm door. By losing my vehicle, which was totaled on saturday May 5, I am being blessed because about 2 weeks ago I realized that I don’t need a showy sports car to prove I am doing well on my own. I need a reliable vehicle that I can drive my children around in and everyone is comfortable. I need a lower payment because trying to keep up a front is too expensive. With each trial someone close to me has been affected. They have learned something in all of this also.

Last night I was speaking to one of the Elders about how I have been tested with so much in so little time as I am on my way to being Baptized on Saturday. He said, “God showing His trust in you in such a way as these recent events is evidence that He knows you have strong faith in Him and in yourself, and you continue to prove that to be true despite the adversities. He knows He can trust you to do great things and really hard things for Him and the benefit of His children.” So, I will count it joy that I am having trials. It doesn’t mean I won’t want to vent to someone but I know who ever I vent to will pray for me.

In conclusion, I hope you can see through my example why having a relationship with God is very important. If I didn’t have this relationship I would have extreme anxiety, probably on anti-depressants, gaining weight, always complaining, never smiling, grumpy about others blessings, have no hope and just plain miserable. My prayer is that you will truly search. That is my desire for my readers of this post. If you have knocked and the door has opened, I pray your relationship will get stronger and you will know without a shadow of doubt that you have been reconciled to God and know that enduring to the end won’t be as bad with Him carrying you through it.

Many people would love to tell what they think is the right answer but when it comes down to it, you are the one that puts the foot in front of the other and pivots in the direction you feel led to go.

Would it be a path that is wide or a path that is narrow?  The path to the left is wider and many walk that path.  That path is the world.  The narrower path is the road less traveled. Why? Because it isn’t popular. It is a road that doesn’t put you first. It puts God first. Why? Because He should be all that matters.

How do you choose the path to be on?

I would have to say from my experience so far, that the best way to choose the path is by being in prayer and under a Pastor that can teach you how to live a holy and godly life unto our Lord. You might fight against it, as I did, for reasons that could be due to life experiences.

For me, I have had a major problem letting men tell me what to do. I haven’t trusted their intentions of telling me what I shouldn’t or should do. Is it for my best interest or theirs? It has been very humbling to realize that the men that have hurt me in my life so far have been on the same path as I was. Could I expect them to be any different if they are on the road of the world? No. A man on the narrow path would cherish, honor, love me as Christ loves His bride.

I know I have said this before but I will say it again. We are here to be reconciled to God. Our souls came from Him and the clothes that cover the soul are dirty.  We are God’s dirty laundry (which is the title of my book I am writing). To start this walk toward reconciliation we must understand what Holiness, Separation and being a living sacrifice means. In a study I did yesterday I would like to share my notes of what these three words that seem so hard to grasp mean.

Holiness.

When this word is applied to us, it means separation or set apart for God. Wow! Can you see yourself as being set apart FOR God? How does that happen? “But ye shall receive power, after that the Holy Ghost is come upon you: and ye shall be witnesses unto me both in Jerusalem, and in all Judaea, and in Samaria, and unto the uttermost part of the earth.” Acts 1:8.  This verse is another that talks about being born again. To truly be born again, you have to receive the Holy Ghost and the proof is speaking in other tongues. I know what you might be thinking…

WHAT?

I was raised Southern Baptist and in my upbringing we were told that speaking in tongues was not good because you don’t know what you are saying and it is of the devil. But then I read the scripture where it says no one knows, not even Satan, only God knows. That made me want to search this out a little more. It is God’s language. 1 Cor. 14:2 “For he that speaketh in an unknown tongue speaketh not unto men, but unto God: for no man understandeth him; howbeit in the spirit he speaketh mysteries.” Paul thanked God that he spoke in tongues more than us all. 1 Cor. 14:18. No wonder others think it is of the devil. That is what Satan wants everyone to think so that you won’t experience God in one of the most intimacy times you could ever have. I experienced this on April 14, 2011. I want the Comforter every time I pray. To be renewed in the Spirit.

Separation.

Ahhhh. That road that we must decide to take.  This separation is between sin and God. Separation is black or white, not gray. You pick sin or God. The world or heaven. We see the world, we don’t see heaven. So it is a battle to live for something you don’t see when you are living in a world you can see. That is the battle. We constantly battle temptations that the eyes see. BUT we can do (and overcome) all things through Christ who gives us strength.  Philippians 4:13.

What does separation look like? If we are to separate from the world of sin, which is Satan’s world, then we must not look like it or have the resemblance of it. Can you see Jesus with earrings in his ears? Walking with his pants down around his thighs? Can you see Jesus looking like the world? No, Jesus is Holy and Separate from the world that leads us to temptation and everlasting death…

A Living Sacrifice.

Even after Jesus was the ultimate sacrifice, we are still told to be a LIVING sacrifice. Huh? Sacrifices are usually dead. At least that is what I think of. When you sacrifice something you are doing away with it, whether for a good cause or not. The definition of sacrifice is the surrender or destruction of something prized or desirable for the sake of something considered as having a higher or more pressing claim. Or giving to a deity, as in homage, which means something giving in acknowledgment or consideration of the worth of another. So, we are to be a sacrifice that is still living. That is mind boggling to me.

Romans 12:1-2 says, “And do not be conformed to this world: but be ye transformed by the renewing of your mind.”  Here you have separation and sacrifice of yourself. You are separating because you are told not to be conformed to this world. You are sacrificing your will and your sinful desires by the renewing of your mind.  To be able to sacrifice and still live, to not be conformed to this world, to be transformed by the renewing of your mind you MUST be surrounded by people that are doing the same. If not, you will have a hard time living a life of separation.  You will be in constant battle, strength being drained, flesh being challenged because you are still in the world trying to live a holy and separated life.

Holiness includes a sacrifice of our desires and wills. That is what Holiness is. It’s separating us from the old man, the old desires and wills. BUT now we should have new desires and wills in the heavenly realm of thinking, not the worldly. There is NOTHING wrong with desire and wills that are prayerfully considered and measured with the Word of God. We come to the conclusion of what is acceptable to God when we come to Him by the Holy Ghost and a Holy Ghost filled Pastor. Your Pastor watches over your soul and your blood is on his hands. He wants you to be protected and in his calling, he suggests things that would help you. Someone that you can trust and see in flesh that God appointed over us. His job is very important because it involves our soul.

The beginning to Holiness is sanctification (separation) and that begins with the hearing of the gospel and continues through faith. Then comes Repentance, and water baptism in Jesus Name; but it’s accomplished by the infilling and indwelling of the Holy Ghost in 1 Peter 1:2.

“But the Comforter, which is the Holy Ghost, whom the Father will send in my name, he shall teach you all things, and bring all things to your remembrance, whatsoever I have said unto you.” John 14:26

Philippians 2:12 says to work out your own salvation with fear and trembling.

We must endure to the end. Hebrews 3:14

Remember that we all have our own personal convictions but we cannot rely on the convictions or lack of convictions of others. We must seek an answer for ourselves on specific issues. We should be taught by Spirit filled teachers that God has placed over us in our Church. Any definite teaching of Scripture is enough conviction in itself, and a person cannot avoid it by saying he does not feel convicted. It’s there in your hands, written on the pages that are bound inside the leather cover.

In conclusion, do not imitate the world of sin. Be a holy people. Separate by being a living sacrifice. The closer you get to God, you won’t need those things. It won’t be easy at first but it will be sooner than you think. Be reconciled to the One who loved you so much that He gave His only Son that if you would believe in Him you should not perish but have everlasting life.  Amen.

So, which road will you take? The wide or the narrow?

Have you ever messed around with a magic pen that when you put it to a blank piece of paper and start moving it around, it reveals things? Well, this green, whatever it was, was revealing what the cloud was.

So, it is spreading and starting to form a shape and I tell my friend, “That looks like a face.” As we stand and watch the outline of two arms spread out, palms up on both sides and a head in the center, I had an idea of what the cloud was going to be in my mind and I said out loud, “That looks like Jesus.”

As soon as I said that the cloud took on colors as if breath was breathed into the cloud and a man was there in flesh tones. His arms spread wide, came together in front of Him with palms still facing up and He brought them in and back out with a snap and my body took off in a vortex. I looked behind me and thought, “what about…” and I was thinking about my life back there but that no longer mattered now. As I started to turn my head back around all I could do was pray, “Please forgive me of my sins God.” Then I was looking straight ahead and feeling my body moving forward as if being pulled by a magnet. I heard people screaming, not in agony but with joy. As if they were on a roller coaster ride. They were yelling, “He came…He came!” I knew then that I was in the rapture!

There was no thought of loved ones. There was no thought of my friend I was standing beside. I always thought if the raputre happened in my life time I would want to be with my kids but I didn’t even think of them and I am a good Momma.

When I woke up I just laid there and a thought for a mild panicky second, did I get left behind?! I felt for my daughter and she was still there. So I knew it didn’t happen. It was just a dream and I wiped a single tear on the right side of my cheek away.  I was then sad because I wanted it to be real.

I have never had a dream about Jesus. I don’t know if you have. If so, that is something very special and don’t take it for granted. You are blessed to have a glimpse of what He wants you to see.  I felt like I had to tell everyone. I didn’t care if it made me look stupid or not. I text some of my friends and family at 4:15 am to tell them I dreamed of the rapture and it was amazing by the different reactions I got.

One said I scared them and they thought something was wrong. Another said they were sorry, it was just a bad dream! Another said how do you feel about that? And yet another asked if I was alright. I was kind of thrown for a loop because I thought people would be saying that is great. But it was the total opposite. I was confused by reactions I guess.

As I asked myself why did I dream that dream, the thought came to me that we have to be ready. I don’t know how many times I heard that from the pulpit, you need to be ready but it never clicked until I had this dream.

I know exactly what it felt like to be on my way to see God and asking for my sins to be forgiven. I should have been prayed up. I didn’t want anything in the way and that is how it should be but I thought how sad that I didn’t have it together to just be thrilled to be going. I felt more like I was going to the Principal’s office and I might find out there are some things I have done that I will be ashamed of because I haven’t given them to God. I felt I was going to disappoint Him when I finally arrived.

I don’t want to feel that way when the time comes. It’s so shallow. It’s so sad. I want to have it together NOW!

Not many times do I dream in colors. So, I searched about the color green that I saw in my dream that was so vivid and memorable. Out of all the sites it still came down to this: When you dream the color green, it is a need for healing, harmony, balance, and reconciliation!!

This dream was to heal my heart, help put me on balance and reconcile me to Him. God is drawing me near to Him. How special is that!

Another significant detail was a single tear that I wiped away off my right cheek. I searched what the meaning is from a tear falling from the right eye first instead of the left. When your first tear falls from the right eye, it’s out of happiness and joy. I woke up with that tear falling.

I truly believe we are put on this earth to be reconciled to God and it is with our free will. Will we choose to be reconciled to God or will we choose to keep one foot in and one foot out of the world or just live in sin?

So I am moving full steam ahead with getting my questions answered and finding out the law and Holiness standards and why we have them. I feel like I have been living one foot in the world and one foot in the Truth. That is no way to live my friend. You probably already know this. It can be very confusing to people that are watching you. Does she live for God or not? It’s all or nothing or is it a little bit of everything…

Pray for me as I start to become dedicated to this path I am on. I want to encourage you to do the same. More writings will come through my search in Holiness. I hope you will join me!

Blessings~

If you sit down and think about it, there are tons of ideas for Valentine’s Day that are both free and romantic. You could make your special someone their favorite dinner, light candles, turn off all the lights, and have a super romantic dinner. Another idea is to revisit the spot where the two of you met, pack a picnic, and take a romantic walk. If you are like most people in Clarksville, you probably met your mate out of state, so re-invent that moment. If it was in a park named something else, make a sign with that name and hang it on a tree and underneath it have a blanket and eat lunch. Romance is about spending time together, and it is not always to spend lots of money doing that.

If you really love your partner, you could write down in words how you feel about them. In other words, you could give them a juicy love letter for Valentine’s Day. That is something to cherish and something she could read every day. You could make a Love Mix of all the songs that remind you of her/him. Decorate the cover with heart stickers, etc…

I was recently watching this movie named “I Hate Valentine’s Day”. In one part of the movie the two men were talking about how he could make up with this woman because he said some really bad things to her.  His friend said, “Men do stupid things and that’s how great things happen. Look at the Wright Brother’s. What is smart about jumping off a cliff with wooden wings? Wood is heavy.” The lesson in that is no matter what you have done, women love men that do what men consider to be “stupid things”. So here are some “stupid things” that might spark your interest on getting back with the woman you lost or make up or just showing her you care….

• Write “ I *heart* you” in flowers outside her bedroom window early in the morning and find a way to get her to look out.
• Serenade her with music outside her house
• Take Red rose pedals and put them on the ground at her car door, if she works, and put Hershey kisses on the pedals to keep them from blowing away. Have a card letting her know you kiss the ground she walks on.
• You could do the same thing if you can get in her home, legally. Have a path of rose pedals leading where ever to surprise her with hundreds of Hershey kisses.
• Buy a box that is unique, maybe fitting her style or what you think it is, have a bunch of paper heart that you could buy at Hobby Lobby and write on each one something you like or love about that person.  The card on the inside is a big gold heart with glitter that says “Will you be my Valentine?”

If you don’t want to be different or creative because you don’t have time or you don’t think you are talented enough then a box of chocolates, dinner,  flowers and a nice card are always special.

Our local florists are taking orders now for Valentines day. So, be sure to get yours in so they can be delivered and brighten her day.

• Franklin Street Florist – 931-647-3341
• Flowers By Tara – 931-645-1935
• Four Seasons Florist – 931-444-6058
• Flowers at 1-800-FLOWERS
• Teleflora Flowers – www.teleflora.com

You confide in one person and wham! it has turned into a rumor mill with so many different varieties in the situation you are in.

What do you believe when you hear it? Are you shocked like these women or are you shaking your head in the no position and then telling your friends?

That has been the story of my life for over a year now. I have disappeared from the public eye for over a year.  I have heard so many things about me, after resurfacing into a new career.  I am ashamed by what I hear my “friends” have said and then I am shocked that those things WERE said about me.  I have been talked about, judged and ostracized.

First, let me say that no one is perfect. That includes the gossiper.  If you hear something about someone, go to the person and let them know it is going around. Maybe you can stop the rumor mill because the person being gossiped about won’t be able to stop it once it gets into the ears of the right people.  It spreads like wild fire.

I am have been keeping a low profile because of the things that have been said about me and how people think I have lived. But now I am breaking my silence. People might not want to deal with me. But then there are those who have the love of God in them and they have come to me and asked what is going on with these rumors. Almost the whole Real Estate department of Clarksville knows the gossip but no one knows the truth because no one has come to me but only a few. I mean, my name has gone to the top of the Chamber of Commerce and it’s been said I have remarried.  Nope! My last name, Long, is my maiden name.  I was known as Art Agnew’s wife and not my own person.  I needed to have a fresh start.  I didn’t expect a fresh start to begin with stones being thrown before a could get up off the ground.

I know I am not going to make people happy and my success as a Realtor was unblemished until my divorce. It gave everyone a way to find something wrong with me and tarnish my reputation through the rumor mill.

Everyone has been gossiped about. If I cared about what people thought, I wouldn’t be working. I would be depressed or better yet, I would be moving to a different state and starting over there.  BUT no, I am staying in Clarksville, for now.

I know that a lot of these rumors are not true.

Why do you have such a hard time coming to me and asking me about it? Why do you have to go to my friends and ask them? Why not come to me? Better yet, why not just stop the rumors dead in their tracks? Don’t be included in this photo.

In some way, everyone is a hypocrite somehow. I have been called a hypocrite, a jealous woman, a cheater, an adulterer, an unfit mother, etc…  Yes, all of these have come back to my ears and it has hurt me on top of everything else.

Did I ever do anything to you?  Did I ever get in your business? No, I stayed in the Word of God, in my children’s life and in my Real Estate.  Real Estate was so busy for me that I didn’t have much time for other things.

Did you come in my home and shut the door and watch how I lived? No. You didn’t.  No one knows what goes on behind close doors, they just assume.

So, I ask and plead with each of you that will read this, STOP the rumor mill before it can go further.  All it does is hurt the one being talked about.

Now it is time to pick myself up off the ground and dust myself off and try again in this world we live in.

Help a Sister out! Stop the Rumor Mill.

As I grew up I became more secluded.  I didn’t go out and party with the rest of the teenagers, I stayed home with the parents or grandparents reading romance novels or watching t.v. and eating popcorn. When I was asked out I was too scared to go because of the stories I was told about how the real world was. I felt safer inside the confines of four walls. Well, until my Senior year in High School but I didn’t do much then either.

Just recently I was told that I acted like a teenager who never got the chance to experience life.  It was an interesting statement that made me think and kinda feel sorry for myself. Here I am, forty years old, and I have actions that are that of a teenager learning what life is all about.

What is “life”?

According to the dictionary life is defined as an account of the series of events making up a person’s life; the course of existence of an individual; the condition of living or the state of being alive. BUT, and that’s a big “but”, I am happy that I am forty and acting like a teenager. It brings youth back. I get to experience all the ups and downs that teenagers experience but with a mature mind and to be frank, appearance. Even though it’s with a mature mind, it sometimes stinks though.

In the Word of God, Romans 12:2, Paul talks tells us not to be conformed to this world. He calls out for us to be a separate people.  Just like the picture above, all the umbrellas are one color except for one.  Are you that one in your job, in your church, in your family, in your friends lives?

This past sunday I had the blessing of being at CAC to hear Pastor Henderson talk about a “Call to Separation”. (If you have never been able to experience the preaching and music from this family, you should try coming to Calvary Apostolic Church and visit.  I drive 3 and 1/2 hours to go and I can tell you it’s worth the drive, though if my car could talk it would be saying something different .)

We are called to be separate from the world.  This is the whole reason why I started Diaries of a Fruitcake. To share my journey to be separate and to help other women put both feet on the right side of the fence.  Each person needs to decide what is the “right side” for them.  The Word of God will help you make that right choice but the journey will be hard because you will have to die to yourself daily.

When we make the choice to follow Christ and be an example, others will see your life and wonder what makes you different. It was that way for me. My neighbor was different in her appearance.  She didn’t wear jeans or pants, she always wore skirts.  She didn’t wear make up but her face glowed with something I wanted. Her hair, long and beautiful, was something that wasn’t dyed or permed, just natural. All of these things made me wonder why she didn’t look like everyone else.  So I asked.  I went over and introduced myself and we sat on her front porch talking about why she looked like she did.

That conversation started a spark in me to help her be liberated. LOL. I was going to find in the Word of God where she might have misinterpreted and free her from the bondage I thought she was in. Little did I know that in my search I would be the one liberated and free from the bondage that the world puts on women. I began an in-depth study of the Word of God and I couldn’t get enough.  It started making sense to me where once things were confusing when I would hear it from the pulpit. I would question and be told, “Oh, that doesn’t apply to us today.” But in the Word, God says He never changes. (Malachi 3:6) We are the ones who change.

So, for those of you who have seen my outer appearance change, don’t feel sorry for me or think that I am depressed. I dress professional and I try to look nice at all times. I just don’t look like I use to.

Before

After

I had over $400 in make up and skin care and was buying over $100 for one pair of jeans at Buckle. (I had 3 pairs.)

Now I don’t wear pants because of MY convictions and I don’t wear make-up or dye my hair blonde anymore. I want to be a natural beauty, not one that is man made.

I know that there are many women out there that wish they could let go of the routine of putting on their face every morning. They wish they could just fix their hair and go. I remember feeling that way. It’s amazing how differently I’m treated when wearing a dress or skirt compared to wearing pants. It’s a positive difference. I am finding I no longer think about putting on a skirt, it is just part of me now. The make-up is still having an affect on me, especially when I want to look really good but I have people around me that tell me I am beautiful without it.  I just gotta start believing it.

If you would like to share your journey, please email me. We can keep each other encouraged. If you are tired and want to start living freely, email me and I can share my story.

In the book of Ruth we see our epitome of a “Lady in Waiting”. Ruth had a totally different approach.

And he said, Blessed be thou of the Lord, my daughter: for thou hast shewed more kindness in the latter end than at the beginning, inasmuch as thou followedst not young men, whether poor or rich. And now, my daughter, fear not; I will do to thee all that thou requirest: for all the city of my people doth know that thou art a virtuous woman.

Ruth 3:10-11 KJV

Ruth was a single woman who was widowed. She had to have experienced the loneliness, longings for the warmth of a husband. To know the pain of losing someone dear and wanting someone to love her. But she lived in victory over the desire to “man hunt.”  Instead of “going after the boys,” she sat still and let God bring her prince to her.

Since my divorce, I have not “man hunt.” I have not gone out to look for other men. Sure, I have looked at facebook profiles but that was as far as I went. I have had men come to me, email me, facebook me, and ask me out but I haven’t felt the desire to do any of that. I had my own reasons why I didn’t go out with anyone. I do know what it’s like to feel the loneliness and wanting the warmth of a husband but I know those things will be satisfied when God finishes with the man I am to be with and finishes with me so that I am what that man needs.

I remember at one time thinking, if I was single I could give all my attention to the Lord. But that was before I divorced and thought I didn’t want a man and I didn’t need someone to hold me if I was sad or hold my hand walking in a park. I was hurt by man. When reality hits, your thoughts change. I am ashamed to admit that. But I am only human. So, in my singleness I am realizing that I need to find that relationship with God and let Him prepare the man and give him the vision of me as his future.

While He is preparing him, He will be preparing me and I will learn how to put God first in all things. It is hard to give it up when you have been in control your whole life. I come from a strong line of women who were in control and did what they had to, to survive. But God gives us the choice between His plans and ours.

Learning from Ruth, she could not have possibly seen that a man like Boaz would one day be her prince. Neither can you with your limited vision see who or where your prince will be. Only God has all things in view.  One of the keys is surrendering the terrible burden of always needing life on your terms. Don’t look back one day and regret that you made your “life mate” choice from a limited perspective because you longed for security of a relationship. I am preaching to myself here, ladies!

So, why does a woman tend to “go after the guys”? Why do women experience difficulty being still and waiting for the man to initiate and develop the relationship? I have found the answer to be in one word: insecurity. An insecure woman has her world centered on something or someone that can be lost or taken away.  Insecurity keeps a woman from experiencing consistent joy even within a relationship because a man cannot provide security, only God can.

Insecurity causes you to cling to a relationship. You feel a lack of confidence unless you have a man. When he is not with you, you fear he will not come back or call again. You want him to make a commitment so you will not lose him. You want all his time and attention.  All your dreams, plans, and goals revolve around him. Insecurity in a relationship can cause jealousy and bickering. It makes you lose your confidence when he looks at another woman. You want to know his plans and with whom he spends his time. You don’t want him to be around other interesting or attractive women; you feel threatened when he is.

When he hurts or disappoints you, you can be upset for days. You live with the fear of doing the wrong thing and losing him. You constantly feel the need to “define” your relationship and talk about your love for each other. You feel that you must show your love for him in greater and greater ways.

Insecurity fills the relationship with frustration and worry. Why do women feel they have to go after men? Many women have believed a lie. They think, “I must get the best for myself because God may not give it to me.” What do you think would have been the outcome of Ruth’s life if she had chosen to believe this lie?

Women tend to struggle with insecurity because of the unique way God created us. God made every little girl with the need to love and be loved by her earthly father. God designed His world with a picture of a family as the theme.  The father protects, loves, and cares for his wife and their children.  The ideal earthly father models the gentle, nurturing love of the heavenly Father. Many young women in our society did not have a father who followed God’s design. This God-given need for a father’s love caused a deficit in their lives.

As a little girl, you may remember feeling the desire to be cherished, loved, and accepted by your daddy. If he failed to show that love to you in God’s way, perhaps you continued to search for a man who would. No man, not even a husband, can fill the need you have for secure love. Only Jesus who “is the same yesterday and today, and forever,” will never disappoint or fail you (Hebrews 13:8)

There was a women who asked the question, “What can I do to get him to notice me?” Note carefully the advice Elisabeth Elliot gave her.

“My answer is ‘nothing.’ That is, nothing toward the man. Don’t call him. Don’t write a little note with a smiley face or a flower or fish under the signature and put it in his campus mailbox. Don’t slide up to him in the hall and gasp, ‘I’ve just got to talk to you!’ Don’t look woebegone, don’t ignore him, don’t pursue him, don’t do him favors, don’t talk about him to nine carefully selected listeners.”

There is one thing you can do: turn the whole business over to God. If he’s the man God has for you, ‘…No good thing will He withhold from them that walk uprightly’ (Ps. 84:11). Direct your energies to obedience, not to nailing the man. God has His own methods of getting the two of you together. He doesn’t need any help or advice from you.  The word nothing is a little does of reality that will help you constantly check your motives whenever relating to a guy. This is not saying you can’t do nice things for a man; it is simply a warning to check your motives.

To become a lady of security and to build security in your life, spend time in God’s Word. Proverbs 1:33 says to listen to God and live securely. As you do, you will find out what God is really like, what His character is, not just what you think or have heard He is like. By spending time in God’s Word, you will also learn what God thinks of you. In 1 Peter 2:4, God says you are a choice and precious to Him. He calls you precious, honored, loved, and His redeemed one in Isaiah 43:1-6. Isaiah 43:7 says you were created for His glory. You are very special to God, so special that He has plans for you: “For I know the thoughts that I think toward you, saith the Lord, thoughts of peace, and not of evil, to give you an expected end.” (Jeremiah 29:11)

Do not allow insecurity to motivate you to maneuver or manipulate your relationships.  Instead of hunting for a husband or boyfriend, concentrate on becoming a woman of excellence (Ruth 3:11) As a lady of security, wait for your heavenly Father to bring about His perfect plans for you.

]]> http://diariesofafruitcake.com/2011/09/lady-of-security/feed/ 0 http://diariesofafruitcake.com/2011/07/characteristics-of-a-fool/ http://diariesofafruitcake.com/2011/07/characteristics-of-a-fool/#comments Mon, 25 Jul 2011 07:21:48 +0000 Thea http://diariesofafruitcake.com/?p=773 The term fool in hebrew refers to a person characterized by moral folly.  Fools lack understanding (10:21), do not store up knowledge (10:14),  fail to attain wisdom (24:7), and refuse correction (15:5; 27:22).  …]]>

The fear of the LORD is the beginning of knowledge; but fools despise wisdom and instruction.  Proverbs 1:7

The term fool in hebrew refers to a person characterized by moral folly.  Fools lack understanding (10:21), do not store up knowledge (10:14),  fail to attain wisdom (24:7), and refuse correction (15:5; 27:22).  They are arrogant (26:5), talk loosely (14:3) and are contentious (20:3). They might have mental intelligence but they are morally foolish.  In sum, they are stubborn and “thick-branined. (Greenstone, Proverbs, p.6)

We have all been fools at one time or another.  Definition for a fool is a person lacking judgment or prudence. There are many areas in your life where you can be a fool.

• Money
• Relationship
• Job
• children

But what about being a fool for love? Elvis sang the song, “I can’t help falling in love with you” and in this song he sings, “Wise men say, only fools rush in…” Do you become the fool by rushing into things because you lacked understanding or you didn’t have the knowledge before?

What causes us to be fools? Sometimes it can actually be immaturity or maybe mental instability. It can also be selfish desires that make us fools.  We can be headstrong, stubborn and being in that frame of mind will cause us to be deaf to the wisdom of a Pastor because…”They don’t understand how I feel.”

A fool hath no delight in understanding, but that his heart may discover itself. Proverbs 19:2

Other translations besides the KJV say, “A fool hath no delight in understand…

• but delights in airing his own opinions. NIV
• they only want to air their own opinions. NLT
• but only in expressing his opinion. ESV
• But only in revealing his own mind. NAS
• But only that his heart may reveal itself. ASV

Clarke’s Commentary on the Bible says this about the with the KJV saying..But that his heart may discover itself:

It is a fact that most vain and foolish people are never satisfied in company, but in showing their own nonsense and emptiness.  But this verse may be understood as confirming the view already given of the preceding, and may be translated thus: “But a fool doth not delight in understanding, though it should even manifest itself.” so I understand. The separated person, that is the person who is in the truth and separate from the world,  seeks understanding in every hidden thing, and feels his toil well repaid when he finds it, even after the most painful and expensive search: the other regards it not, though its secret springs should be laid open to him without toil or expense.

Such men only desire to have some knowledge and understanding, to make a show of it, that they may be thought to be wise, and to be capable of talking of things as if they understood them, when it is only to the exposing of themselves and their ignorance; some persons attain to no more learning and knowledge than just to be capable to show that they are fools.  Or, “but in the discovery of his heart”, he delights in discovering that; not the wisdom, but the folly that is in it.

For me, I never want to be the fool.  I have often wondered over the past year if I was a fool for believing in something that I prayed over. Yes, I prayed EVERY DAY and I even journaled it. I wouldn’t make a move without knowing that it was time to make a move.  Even when a Pastor I spoke with told me if I didn’t do what he was saying I would experience hell like I never knew it.

During my separation there was an evangelist that came down from the pulpit and straight to me and laid hands on my head and prayed over my mind because he saw that Satan would be playing with my thoughts and I would feel like I was losing my mind in the future.  I couldn’t understand what he was talking about and thought it might be related to my divorce. My hell has been in the mind. Causing confusion and my discernment is clouded or maybe it isn’t and it is the cloudiness of others. I’m surprised I haven’t broken down into a major depression but as long as I pray and stay in the Word, depression will not root itself because the Lord will lift me from it. He is the Healer!

When it comes to understanding every hidden thing, that can be very aggravating to others who don’t have much patience.  I am the type of person who wants understanding. I no longer am the child in the classroom that wouldn’t raise their hand and ask the questions for fear of looking stupid. If the questions I ask make me look stupid, then that is the expense of finding the answer.  I might get a response of…ugh, you need to stop!…Why do you do that?…Are you serious? Or the worse thing…silence. BUT I am not afraid of those responses because it is SOOOO important that I get the answers. The only way I won’t get an answer and a peace in my soul is through the silence.

If so be that ye have heard him, and have been taught by him, as the truth is in Jesus:  That ye put off concerning the former conversation the old man, which is corrupt according to the deceitful lusts; And be renewed in the spirit of your mind; And that ye put on the new man, which after God is created in righteousness and true holiness.  Wherefore putting away lying, speak every man truth with his neighbor: for we are members one of another. Be ye angry, and sin not: let not the sun go down upon your wrath: Neither give place to the devil. Ephesians 4:21-27

Let all bitterness, and wrath, and anger, and clamor, and evil speaking, be put away from you, with all malice: And be ye kind one to another, tenderhearted, forgiving one another, even as God for Christ’s sake hath forgiven you.  Ephesians 4:31,32

So reading these scriptures is the answer to why you don’t need to use silence when you know it hurts the other. If you need time to think and don’t want to talk, say so and the other party should respect your wishes. The person waiting for you to break your silence will learn patience through prayer. Just remember we are to not let the sun go down while we are angry with another. Hence why I appear to wear my heart on my sleeve and want to talk and make things right by sharing my thoughts. Thoughts that can seem wordy…like this post.

In conclusion of the characteristics of a fool, know that a fool wouldn’t seek knowledge, wisdom and understanding. The appearance of looking stupid by asking questions is the judgment of a fool.  A fool would not try to understand others and only rely on their own thoughts as being right. They wouldn’t be considerate of others feelings and be like Ephesians 4:32 says, “…be ye kind one to another, tenderhearted, forgiving one another, even as God for Christ’s sake hath forgiven you.”

Adultery begins with a thought.

You might think you are strong and can keep your eyes to yourself but what happens when the woman wears the blouse a little to low and you can see her cleavage? Or maybe the skirt is a little above the knee? Your thoughts are what happens next. I like to say there is a second look rule.  You look once without thought. If someone is attractive, you look.  When you do a double take or you turn to look back or you position yourself where you aren’t obvious that you are looking, your thoughts have possibly turned into sin.

Matthew 5: 27,28 Jesus said, “Ye have heard that it was said by them of old time, Thou shalt not commit adultery: But I say unto you, That whosoever looketh on a woman to lust after her hath committed adultery with her already in his heart.”

Lust in the dictionary means, self-indulgent sexual desire; a strong sexual desire; have a craving, appetite, or great desire for.

Women who dress this way might say they do because they are confident about their appearance but the truth of the matter is this…

They want the attention. They need it.
They are missing something very important in their life. A piece that belongs to Jesus. By dressing this way women hinder not only the man but the other women around.  Women? For the woman it’s not always jealousy or low self esteem. Ladies, it is fear.

My Momma told me a while ago what fear means.

FEAR =

F- False

E- Events

A- Appearing

R- Real

You might cause their spouse or boyfriend to have a wandering eye for you. This leads to ungodly thoughts. It’s not a woman’s insecurities, it’s their home unit that is being invaded. They might have a man that they like and in walks the woman looking all seductive and the man naturally will look at her. The woman who isn’t dressed provocatively but modest begins to fade in the background.

I was this woman at one time. I began to ask myself why I wore so much eye make-up and why I chose those tight jeans. When I was truthful with myself, I started paying attention to everything I did. I wore the eye make up to attract my husband, at the time, to my eyes. I would always get compliments on my eyes. I wanted the compliments from him but if he didn’t notice, someone did. He liked me wearing make up. I wore the tight jeans so that it would show off my curves. I was wanting attention, to feel attractive and my ex liked me in jeans, not skirts. I carried myself with my shoulders back, head raised and chest forward. I was confident in my walk but I was messed up in my heart. It wasn’t until I found Jesus and became convicted on it that I stopped doing these things for attention. It was really hard to let go of it, especially when you no longer have someone to compliment you and you have been used to getting those compliments. I realized that by wearing the clothes and make up like I did, I was causing others to stumble. I didn’t want to be a stumbling block. Yes, I wanted to be attractive to my husband but not at the expense of other men looking and their wives or girlfriends sending me daggers with their looks.

So ladies, let’s be honest, you might want to ask yourself these questions that I asked myself:
1) When you put on your clothes, why do you choose provocative instead of modest apparel? Do you put on the jeans and turn around and think your bottom looks good and you will get looks on it? Or maybe the tightness on your legs will show how skinny you are? Maybe the shirt is low and reveal your cleavage, showing what you have? Will all eyes be on you?
2) Why do you make yourself pretty with artificial cosmetics? Do you put on the eyeliner thick to bring the color of your eyes out? Do you want them to look there instead of the bad areas you think you have? Maybe your eyes are the only thing you think is attractive? That isn’t true.  Natural beauty is attractive and believe me, when a man sees the inside being beautiful, you will become the most attractive woman ever.

Haha, men reading this might think, what? A man doesn’t look at the inside and the beauty comes to the outside. Men, I am telling you, when you see a woman who isn’t showing off her assets, sure you probably won’t give her a second look but if that woman became a friend or asked you for coffee and sat across from you, you would be seeing the real woman, not the appearance of the woman. Her heart will show on her face and she would start to spark something in you. She might be smart, she might be funny, she might be all of those things and when you see who she is, inside, you will be attractive for the right reasons, not the false reasons.

One thing you have to understand is that not all women who dress modest do so because they don’t care about being what the world considers attractive. They do care about their appearance. They want to be clean and attractive but naturally and modestly. They do so because they are led to be natural. They don’t want to be a stumbling block to other men or women.  They are covering a multitude of sin that could be happening because of the way they appear to the world.  They are not being conformed to this world but standing out with the standard of purity and modesty. God has a standard and it is written for a reason in the Bible.

Isaiah 47:2-3 reveals what God calls “nakedness” or immodesty. It is to “make bare the leg” and “uncover the thigh”.  1 Timothy 2:9 calls us, men and women, to dress in modest apparel.When you have such a love for God and such an abhorrence for worldliness that you will allow God to set your standards as to whether a dress is modest or not…you can’t go wrong!

Yes, man will sin with their thoughts even over women who dress modestly but the difference is you. If you are being worldly, not living for what God says, then you will be just as much at fault. You will be adding fuel to the fire. I know this might seem harsh but this is the truth. You are making it harder for others and yourself to live a Holy life because you are getting the wrong approval. You are getting approval from man and not your God.  If you are living for God and dress modestly and man or woman stumble in their sin, it is their sin, not yours.

So women, let’s cover a multitude of sin and dress modestly not provocatively.  Pay attention to your motives when you put on your make up, your clothes.  When you do, you will have to come to terms on why you are doing it in the first place, like I did. If you can honestly say that you wear everything because you like it, go a step further and ask why you like it. If you love putting on make up and are good at it, you gotta go deeper and realize that maybe, just maybe by you wearing it to show off how good you are, you get the ladies complimenting you and making you feel good about yourself. It’s nice to have accolades but you would find it is more fulfilling having accolades when you are doing it for the right reasons. Really what is make up good for? Making you more attractive? Hey, I was there. When a man sees you in your natural and loves you, you are accepted for who you really are. You have let your mask down. You are showing the REAL you.

Some helpful hints. I was given some “covers” that snap onto my bra and I couldn’t believe how much I revealed with my shirts until I put one on. I don’t have to get rid of all my shirts and wear high collars, I just snap on the cover to my bra and I am more modest. Decide on the length of your skirt to not go over your knee. That means when you sit down, your knees aren’t showing.  Why? Well, everyone is convicted differently depending on where they are in their walk with Jesus and what their Pastor preaches. If a man can see your knee or above your knee, his thoughts will wander to what you look like without that skirt. Yes, that is his problem but he wouldn’t have that problem if he couldn’t see your knee. So help a brother out. Don’t show your knee.

I know this generation is all about ME, ME, ME. But can we stop and think of others and how we can help them? Our sacrifice to our selfishness will be rewarded.

There are no guarantees, no safety nets, just trusting your heart and taking that first step.

Second chance? Do you take it and fly? Or do you ignore it and tell yourself it isn’t time because you have other things going on? Maybe you think you don’t deserve a chance at something that could be amazing because you don’t want to drop your guard and possibly be hurt again.  It’s safer to not have loved than to love at all and get hurt, right?

WRONG!

We all know love or relationships are hard work.  Having to learn personalities all over again and hoping that they aren’t like the others that didn’t work out before them.  Every relationship that has gone sour, hurt. You know what you don’t want in the next person that is given a chance to get to know you…but you aren’t giving them a chance, you are giving yourself a chance.

A chance to be happy, to enjoy someone’s company, to laugh, hold hands, feel a part of someone’s life and to be hurt. To argue, not always agree with someone, need space to miss that person, someone to run to when you wanna cry but be connected to someone, non the less. No pain, no gain…right? It is so true when you have found someone or someone has found you and there is a connection.

RelationSHIP

It seems to be the most un-sturdy and uncertain vessel to navigate through any ocean of the heart. While the warm winds of prevailing love and romance blow favorably through its sails, this unseaworthy vessel steers ahead with pride and promise. But upon hitting rough and stormy weather, too often the relationSHIP flounders and sinks.

How do you know if you are in a relationship? Well, the definition for relationship is a state of connectedness between people, especially an emotional connection.

What is an emotional connection in a relationship? It’s something that goes beyond just the physical. It’s being able to relate to a person on an emotional level. To be able to share your feelings with them, being open and vulnerable, and trusting that person not to hurt you emotionally. Though it could happen. When you find that you are spending a lot of time together in a relaxed environment you will find opportunities for sharing feelings and talk openly about things. One thing that nourishes the emotional connection is cuddling. I am not talking about sexual touching but non-sexual touching and physical closeness.  We communicate a lot nonverbally.  Hugging, cuddling, touching, holding your partner – these things all express your feelings for him or her without saying a word.

When two people spend quality time together, sharing, caring, nurturing, and loving, an emotional attachment is formed.  If this continues overtime, the bond created becomes deeper and stronger. It will almost feel as if they have known each other all their lives.

An emotional connection fuses souls and strongly ties two hearts together, making individuals inseparable.  When a person is able to feel your heartaches, that constitutes an emotional connection. When kind words are used to uplift each other, then there is no question as to what it is.  It is, indeed, an emotional connection, and no other feeling in this world could compare.

In the event of two available individuals, two that are not attached in a marriage or other relationship, it should be highly valued.  Love is the end result of such unified bond. A bond which can withstand the test of time, and continue to live on long after individuals are gone.

Life is too short to ignore chances that come your way.  I am a firm believer that everything happens for a reason. There is no such thing as a flukes. It wasn’t chance you met this person or that.  They are in your life for a season or for a life time.  Only God knows and it is God who you have to trust to get you through.

So what do you do, when love comes along and offers your heart a chance to move on?

What makes us wanted?

Is it our personality? Our spirit and attitude toward others?
Doesn’t those qualities make someone beautiful on the outside? Or is it strictly the eye candy; what we look like on the outside?

The outside appearance is what 99% of the time attracts someone to you before they know what you are like on the inside. That is how society has conditioned us to be.
Sure, being attractive gains the attention of a man but what about your flaws, your quirks? Flaws like scars on your body or maybe burns that you cover up?
Will the man who has been courting you and getting to know the inside, turn once he sees what is hidden?

Well, first of all no man should see what is hidden, physically under clothes until you are married. So, if you are faithful to your convictions, what will this man think on the wedding night and he sees scars that were hidden? Will he feel like he was fooled? Or will his love be so strong that your scars are part of you? They are a road map to your journey in life. Are there men that think like that or is this just my romantic heart talking?

(Men reading this might say, “No, I wouldn’t turn away.” But there are men that would. Men who think it is all about him and his quest, no matter whose heart he breaks in the journey to finding the perfect woman.)
There is no perfect woman. The women modeling the cover of any magazine is always photoshopped. Some flaw is being covered up. We all have flaws. Including the men looking.

Why am I saying all of this? Because there are women out there that have experienced the heart ache of someone sharing and saying everything that made them fall. That person might have been genuine and sincere but there are men who will say all the things to win your heart and once you share yourself, your family, your hopes and dreams, your very being; you find out that they weren’t serious even though they sounded like it with all the right words. Could it be because you shared what was covered up? He saw the flaws and maybe he knows he will find someone that isn’t as badly scared as you because he really wants the top of the line. Your line has kinks.

Is this how the dating scene is?

I’m new to the dating field and I have not dated since my divorce, which has been about a year now. Sure I have been asked out but I haven’t been able to allow myself to put that foot forward. After being married for 20+ years, marrying young at 18 and only dating a few men before marrying, I am finding that I have a lot to work on. I come across as naive, being easily deceived, or too trusting when it comes to things said to me. When I talk to someone, I guess I don’t have my guard up if I am looking at them in the eye. I always give that person standing in front of me the benefit of the doubt and my trust until he is caught in lies. Then I start building my wall one brick at a time. I no longer let him see all of who I am because he was secretive, deceptive and sneaky. Trust has to be rebuilt.

What happens when your focus shifts?

I no longer gave my Lord the attention I was giving Him all these years since I found the truth. The Word says that He is a jealous God. I believed that now was my time to be happy and thinking that I was saved and knowing how God heard all my cries and knew the desires of my heart, I could concentrate on being happy with someone who loved the Lord too. My priorities being shifted caused me heartache and confusion. I’m so sorry, not because it caused me heartache and confusion but because I hurt God.

There are so many people hurting from relationships or confusions of what it is they really have. If they would turn to God, pursue Him, all else would fall into place. A friend of mine was talking about the verse that says if you delight in God, He will give you the desires of your heart. Psalm 37:4

Delight thyself also in the Lord; and he shall give thee the desires of thine heart.

If you trust in the Lord and do what is right… He will answer your prayers. The answer might be a “yes” or it could be a “no” but non the less, He will answer in His timing.  Your faith and obedience will bring divine blessing.  Hebrew translation says, He will grant to you the requests of your heart. It doesn’t mean you use this verse to get what you want.  God knows your heart. You can’t truly delight in Him without having the truth in you. Once you truly delight in Him, you will forget your desires and want only what He wants for your life.  At least that is what is happening to me. See, His ways are better than ours.  It’s just admitting it to yourself and believing it and living it.

So in conclusion of my post, “Covered Up” we all cover up something that we don’t want the other person to know for fear that they will see our faults and run. Especially if we really like that person and could see something futuristic with them.  When you open yourself up and share your heart, you have just let someone in to see the real you. There is NOTHING wrong with sharing your heart, it is a sign of trusting that person.  I would say 100% of the time that person you trust will hurt you BUT you have to understand that in your search for the perfect person, there is no one perfect. Every one of us gets hurt by someone we care about. It’s what you do with your hurt.  Forgiveness and the will to start rebuilding what has been cracked is up to you.

It is just like a wound. Once you have an open wound, the healing takes place and you have a scar. Scars can be reopened but only if you ALLOW it.  When they are, you find scar tissue. Scar tissue is tough to cut through and once it heals, it becomes tougher. When someone you care about hurts you and you make the choice to stay and not run, your relationship becomes tougher. But it is up to you. Do you want to search for the perfect person and have many scars?  It is your choice. Your free will. Doing it alone and your way is what will take you longer to finding peace. The key is knowing the One who heals those hurts and can help put you back on the road to recovery.

JESUS!

Just have… “a closer walk with thee.”

If the person that has hurt you by their actions is meant to be in your life, God will convict their heart and they will try to make things right. They will grow in the Word and so will you. Who knows if when you both put your delights in God, He merges your paths because it was all in His timing.  He is the mender of all open wounds. It’s up to you if you want scars all over your heart by doing it yourself.

God is calling us to Stand Out! Be not conformed to this world.

2 And do not be conformed to this world: but be ye transformed by the renewing of your mind, that ye may prove what is that good, and acceptable, and perfect, will of God. Romans 12:2

When I think about those words, not only do I think about appearances but what the world is into.  How Satan is getting into the church. He is starting on our young people early in their lives and their parents are the example by being chained to their computer or moblie device.  It will be harder for them to break this yoke the earlier he gets them involved.

Everything our forefathers stood for to keep us from falling into the trap has snuck in through the back door.

8 Be sober, be vigilant; because your adversary the devil, as a roaring lion, walketh about, seeking whom he may devour: 9 Whom resist stedfast in the faith, knowing that the same afflictions are accomplished in your brethren that are in the world. 1 Peter 5:8,9

We have kept a watchful eye not to listen to certain music, drink, dance, watch tv/movies, read but the one thing that is a clever tool that Satan can use to sink his teeth into us and take hold is technology.  The computer and cell phone.  It’s the way of the world.  If you don’t have a smartphone you aren’t cool.  If you don’t have a facebook page, what’s wrong with you? Get with it!  Now Google + is coming out and it will be just as big.  Giving facebook competition.  More things will come out with facebook to keep them in the lead.

The key is not becoming addicted to it and if you have, know how to get out of it. How do you know you’re addicted? Do you have to get on Facebook daily? Do you have it set up on your phone where you get messages and you always know when someone comments on a photo or status? Do you find yourself getting on Facebook more than 4 times a day? Read what the Bible has to say about addiciton. People have become addicted to the internet.  I’m being convicted as I write this, too.  I’m known as the google queen to all my family and friends. I google everything I have a question about.  I need to rely more on the word of God and not the internet.

How do we spend most of our time?  That is how we will know that what we are addicted to. We need to repent because our attention hasn’t been where it should be.  Sin is only a “click of the mouse” away.

What would the world do if Facebook did shut down?  What would they do with their time? Actually go out and talk to people? Society has become lazy, letting their fingers do the walking and talking.  People will get mad and defensive about this because you will be threatening their sweet tooth and causing them to possibly have to throw away their candy so their teeth won’t rot out!

We have to stand out. To not be conformed to the world. When you hear about people you know not having a facebook what do you think?  People see them different, like they aren’t with the times or they might be old fashion and be denying the power of this age.  The thing you might not see is that they are standing out.  They aren’t like everyone else. They are different.  Not being conformed to the world even though using facebook touches the world.

That is the little back door satan uses on Christians.  We pride ourselves loving God and being strong in the Lord and our appearance and actions reflect that.  But satan is dangling the apple here, no pun intended.

He knows his way in and builds up your ego by saying, “You are strong; You won’t allow anything to sneak in and move your attention away from Godly things; You can reach millions with a video or word of encouragment.” But then you become friends with someone you don’t know and they put a video up that you never would have looked at and your curiosity gets the best of you and you crack that door, peaking inside.  The breach has been broken and satan is very patient to tear you down.  You are no longer protected.  More things find there way in and before long you are wondering how you got this far off course.

There is more damage being done through the excuse of why we have a page in the first place. “Oh, I use it to touch lives.” But what happens when you become weak and let that woman or man of the world comment and tell you how interested they are in you and how gorgeous or good looking you are? They stroke your ego and you start building a wall of pride.  What is pride? It’s the quality or state of being proud.  What is proud? Having or showing excessive self-esteem. Highly pleased.  Many men and women have fallen from their calling because satan has slivered his way through the currents of electricity.

To make a difference would involve a blog with no interaction. The interaction I am talking about is chatting, texting, messaging. You will catapult your ministry by blogging each post. I don’t know if you know much about blogging but it will put you out there on the internet faster with each post.  The interaction should be done in person. If you would haven’t this person or that person in your church office alone with the door closed, what makes it any different than talking alone in the comfort of your room with your shoes off or in bed and chatting on your computer, iPad or smartphone?

If you can’t sit next to a woman or man without being worried what everyone else thinks then how is it any different having that woman or man as a friend and making overly friendly comments about your pictures and that person just happens to be married?  He/She needs to be confronted with care because that is flirting outside of the marriage.  The one thing that God holds in high regard and compares to the church.  Being the bride of Christ.  Marriages are being threatened.  What was once strong, letting no man destroy, it is being torn apart and satan loves every bit of it.  Pastors are leaving their wife for the woman they have counseled and become chatty friends with which led to an emotional connection.

Just like a computer has a firewall for viruses, we must have a firewall for satan.  Recognizing that, being convicted of that is something we must not fight against. If you are going to be the best in the world of saving lives, start with your own first by following God’s word and not being conformed to this world and their standards.  Their standards are proven by being up to date with the world of technology.  Doing everything everyone else is doing.  You are imitating their ways and it doesn’t set you apart and separate, thus causing you to stand out.

You can lose your credibility in what you stand up and preach when you have a facebook, twitter, smartphone that shows them you allow things in your life that a man or woman of God should not have.  It’s time to clean the temple of God and Stand Out! Just like Jesus became angry and threw the money changers out, what would He be doing as we defile the temple of God with these worldly things? I’m talking to myself, also.

I’m going to take a stand.  I want to protect my walk like others before me. 

The wife of a man – beware….Flattery by men can crack your foundation in your marriage.  You will view your husband as a man who doesn’t have time for you and satan has entered in through your emotional vulnerability.  Men beware….the woman uses flattery to stroke the ego.  Where your wife is busy with the children, housework, extra job outside of the home or taking care of you and your needs, having another build you up with praise will tear you and your ministry down.  Women….The lives of others being displayed for their friends and the world to see has opened the floor for gossip and meddling.  Something women have the natural instinct for and must put on the full armor of God and protect against.

The church is being attacked.  It’s time to place your foot on solid ground and stand out!!

This video below is good.

I am so sorry for your pain. Believe me when I say you are not alone. God hears your cries and catches every one of your tears and puts it in a bottle. I am going through another storm of gossiping about me right now that is ALL over the city I live in. Gossip is something that the Bible talks about, as I am sure you already know. The fact this woman, who serves in the church, has told things about you that are false should tell you something. You and I aren’t judging this woman but seeing that the fact she is spreading false accusations means she isn’t where she needs to be. She needs our prayers. The thing that I always say out loud to myself and God when things like this happens is:

Jesus, this person is messing with Your child.  You said that vengeance is yours and I am asking you to take care of this for me. I can’t do anything more than what You could do. I am hurt by these words, convict him/her to stop and let them see the error of their ways. Please allow this person to feel the hurt I have in my heart.  I pray that if they are truly a child of Yours that You will take care of it the best way that only You know how. I will just screw it up. I know if they truly have a heart for you, they will be convicted and come to me to make things right. If they don’t have a heart for you God, then what else can I expect from someone who doesn’t know You, live for You, love You?  Help me to forgive them.

Now about you moving your seat from this church to another….I would first want to ask you if you have spoken to your Pastor about this?  The Pastor needs to know what is going on with his flock.  He has been called to this position from God and holds a very high responsibility looking after His sheep. It sounds like there is already division in your church and your Pastor needs to be made aware of it, if he doesn’t already know. Otherwise how can there be growth as a whole?

The next thing I would suggest is to pursue God. Pursue means to chase & capture. When you are in pursuit of something with the goal of capture in mind, you will be amazed at what will happen in your walk with God.  Take your focus off your pain.  Jesus took a lash from the cattail that was made out of glass that day He was crucified and that lash was for all your pain you have felt, feel and will feel. He took it for YOU. It’s already taken care of.  You just have to believe it. God has a big bottle, every tear you shed is going in it.  He has a book, and He’s writing down your prayers, and He tells of your wanderings.  He knows all about what’s going on.  He’s heard you the many times you sought Him over one particular need.  After awhile that bottle becomes full and He has to do something about it. Just one more tear may do it.

Is any among you afflicted? let him pray.  James 5:13

It’s obvious that your affliction hasn’t moved overnight.  You hope it will be taken care of NOW but for some reason, count it joy Sister, He sees you and is allowing this to happen to you.  He is building your faith and bringing you closer to Him.  Forget that this person has wronged you and thank God that He has allowed it to happen because you are seeking Him.

For ye have need of patience, that, after ye have done the will of God, ye might receive the promise.  Hebrews 10:36

I will be praying for you and if you would like to talk more, please email me.  I would also suggest you getting the book, Prayer by Verbal Bean.

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