I was at work sitting in the break room checking my Facebook when I found out via my newsfeed that Don Cornelius had died today, in an apparent suicide. Just in case you’re totally un-hip and an unprecedented BAMMA, Don Cornelius created “Soul Train” back in the early 1970s and for decades it was the #1 place on TV to showcase Black Music and all other elements of Black Culture, from, fashion, hairstyles, language, dance, etc. Go check it out on Youtube and get your entire life!

It was such a shock that I felt like someone had kicked me in the gut. All the air was knocked out of me. The legendary creator and host of Soul Train was gone, and in such a sad way. I said a quick prayer for a Peaceful Journey, hoping that whatever sadness enveloped him to the point of suffocation had finally released him in transition. Depression hurts, y’all. Sometimes folks believe that killing themselves is the only way to make the pain go away. Please remember to Love. Always in every way.

Then I started to think about what the iconic Black dance & music show Soul Train has meant to me in my life. It was a very vivid and important part of my early childhood. I remember that the very first time I’d ever laid eyes on Michael Jackson, it was when he was performing on Soul Train with his brothers. I think I was about 4 or 5 years old, so it had to have been 1977 or 1978 and I knew in that moment that I was in Love. Whatever Love means to a preschooler. But outside of that heart & soul-defining moment, I remember that Soul Train was the show that we watched on Saturdays after cartoons went off and we got to see all the singers and bands that we listened to on the radio and on albums any other time. This a period of time before music videos, so Soul Train is how I found out that Black artists were amazing and beautiful to look at. As I got a little older, I was REALLY into the hair/makeup/fashion of the women I saw dancing on Soul Train. Black Girls shaking their Groove Thang and being oh so flyy in the process! So much inspiration for a little Black Girl trying to find her beauty in the sea of Whiteness that is mainstream American media. Yes, Soul Train was as much a part of my growing up as double-dutch and roller skating were. Soul Train taught me to Body Roll! To this day, whenever I hit the dance floor and get into a good groove, I like to imagine myself as some Better Than Everything Black Girl dancing on Soul Train. Twirlin’. Dippin’ Low & Bringin’ It Back Up. We all have the innovation of Mr.Don Cornelius for that. I am so grateful for the legacy that he leaves behind. Thank you.

Here’s a clip I found of Mr.Don Cornelius going down the Soul Train Line, TWICE. He says it was his very first time! The man had some moves! Check it out:

"Are You Red-dy" by Maybelline. My favorite red lippie right now.

So, this whole “Red Lipstick For Black Girls” has been an issue for me for a little while. OK, for a long while. Mainly because wearing red lipstick is allegedly yet another thing that Black Girls aren’t supposed to do. A few weeks ago, I asked around the Internet to see what other people knew about the racial & gender-based sin of wearing red lipstick. Here’s what I was told by those who chose to respond to my question “Why is it that Black Girls aren’t supposed to wear red lipstick??”

• It’s trashy
• It’s whorish
• It’s for “loose” and “fast” women
• Black Girls’ lips are too big
• Everything ain’t for everybody
• Black Girls’ Black is too black
• Define “red”

You see how MOST of that has to do with alleged sexual promiscuity and hypersexualization of Black women? Sprinkle in a bit of classism, colorism and self-hate and you get a bunch of B.S. notions on what’s good for Black Girls. A lot of these answers extended to the wearing of red clothing and even wearing red nail polish.

Now, my Wise & Beautiful Mother was the first to bring up the hurtful imagery of the Lil’ Black Sambo stereotype as a reason why some Black women probably shy away from wearing red lipstick.

This isn't even the worst picture that came up in the Google Image Search.

Just looking at how we’ve historically been  presented to the world in such an ignorant manner is painful. Now this right here [coupled with the aforementioned bullet pointed bullshyt] I can see causing a Black Girl to believe that red lipstick isn’t for her. All of this is painful, ugly and most of all, UNTRUE.

I’ve learned in my lifetime of playing in makeup, that the key to wearing it well is that you have to find out what works for you. I don’t care what race you are, if you don’t know that then you’re pretty much screwed in the Face Painting game. That goes for foundation, eyeshadows, blushes and RED LIPSTICK. It is my sincere belief that ANYBODY can wear red lipstick, but especially a Black Girl. Most colors look good on us anyway, thanks to having so much melanin in our skin. All you have to do is find the shade of red that works for you. Some of us can rock a candy apple shade, others look best with brick red. Still others may need something even deeper…or not. Just be brave and try some on. I got my first red lipstick from Sephora years ago and I’ve been in love with that color on my lips ever since.

Need some tips on how to rock your red lippie? Check out this post, “5 Foolproof Ways To Wear Red Lipstick” from contributor Sherry Blossom on Afrobella.com, one of my favorite beauty blogs.

I asked for the Black ladies who read this blog and/or follow me on Twitter/Facebook/Tumblr to submit pictures of themselves wearing their red lipsticks to show just how damn well we wear the red and I was overwhelmed by the response! This slideshow is the result of the  30-plus gorgeous pictures I received:

Yeah, I tossed a pic or three of myself in there…#YouLikeIt. And if you like “I Only Have Eyes For You” from Rahsaan Patterson’s newest album “Bleuphoria”, click here to cop it. 

Don’t let what some other fearful and misinformed person has to say about how our lips look and what the color “red” means overall scare you away from embracing such a beautiful and rich color as red. Believe in your own beauty, no matter what color you rock! Nobody gets to tell Black Girls what colors ain’t for us…ALL the colors are in us! We look good in red and the proof is right here before your eyes.

• Do you wear red lipstick? Why or Why Not?
• What have you heard in regards to Black Girls and red lipstick?
• If you do wear red lips, what’s your favorite red lippie?

~pbg

Can we talk about Jennifer Hudson being in cahoots with those “diet” people over at Weight Watchers to make people think that FAT=HORRIBLE & TACKY? Yes, let’s do that. I’ve been meaning to rant about this for at least a week. I’m about sick and tired of seeing Jennifer Hudson in these awful TV ads for Weight Watchers. She’s been wailing like a newly-freed slave for those Weight Watchers coins ever since she gave birth to her son. Weight Watchers apparently thinks that not only is Jennifer Hudson is of, at least, mediocre intellect, that the rest of us fat-ass [Black] women watching TV are as well. While all of Jennifer’s Weight Watchers commercials have rubbed me the wrong way in general, I have to say this one here is the one that REALLY makes me wanna slap the wig off of somebody’s head:

Have a damn seat.

But I find this commercial most disturbing because most of us understand that Old and Tacky Jennifer didn’t have the same access  [read :money] to the things/practices/procedures that made New and Improved Jennifer able to look the way that she does now. Let’s pretend that New and Improved Jennifer never lost the weight. Here’s what you have:

This Jennifer won the Grammy, Golden Globe & Oscar. New & Improved Jennifer ain't doing shyt but singing for Weight Watchers.

There are a couple of things I need Weight Watchers to stop trying to telling us using Jennifer Hudson, a beautiful, rich Black woman, to do it:

Stop telling us there is something inherently wrong with Fat Bodies. There isn’t. This isn’t about how much anyone cares about fat women’s health, because they really don’t. This is about playing into the insecurities of women who have been lead to believe that skinny = best-thing-on-Earth-and-if-you’re-not-you-are-ugly/sick/undesirable. For profit. Everybody should know by now that “fat” doesn’t necessarily equal “unhealthy”. Body policing and fat shaming needs to die in these mean American Streets.

Stop telling us through these awful commercials that tired ass “This could be you story”. The average woman (who is a size 12/14, by the way) is not going to be able to transform like Jennifer did without Jennifer’s funds. And those funds came to be via the success she enjoyed with her Fat Body.

Quite frankly, I’d respect Jennifer more if she were doing ads for hair weave, makeup and body shapers. That’s a more accurate depiction of who she “is” now.

~pbg

Yo baby yo baby yo baby, yo. Check out this DPT Freshness for The New Year…

Yes, I do love Blogging and all of you good folks that check for my writing every time I post, but since I don’t seem to be making it over to this space as often as I’d like to with my Real Job and all, here’s what I decided to do & I hope you all like it:

Dirty Pretty Thangs has a microblog now called “Little Dirty Pretty Thangs”, of course. Yes, my blog has a Baby Sister now! I’m hosting it on Tumblr and I hope you folks who are already on Tumblr will follow it. This is where the quick tidbits of the goodies (i.e., natural hair pics, makeup and fashion looks, random thoughts and the many exclamation points of my day-to-day happenings) I want to share will go. Think of it as a drop-off point for things not quite big enough for this main blog but way too big for Twitter.

PBG 366: A Year In Pictures: I tried to do a year-long picture blog for my 37th year, but I failed! I stopped at Day #57! LOL! I’m gonna try it again. It’s another Tumblr blog, so if you’re on Tumblr, feel free to follow along.

I’m accepting submissions for…whatever, I guess! Remember when I used to answer letters for advice? The “Hey, You Asked!” series will come back as soon as I get a couple of letters. Let me help you! Are you a person who’d like to say something but you don’t keep a blog? Borrow my space for a little while. I’ll feature folks’ writing here if asked…no problem!  I’ll also feature your beauty and fashion looks because I LOVE Faces of The Day (FOTD) and Outfits of The Day (OOTD). These will be a great addition to my “Dark n’ Lovelies” series that consisted of beautiful manicures on Black Girls’ hands, which I am also still interested in featuring. If you make stuff like cookies n’ cakes (doesn’t everybody now?), beautiful jewelry, hair and skin products, holla at me as well! I’d love to do a review! Submit all your “everythings” to askthepbg@gmail.com.

Currently in the works: A Dirty Pretty Thangs Youtube Channel! Well, the channel is set up, but I have no videos there yet. I got this new camera back in October AND I bought a tripod with a gift card I got from one of my Work Families (Thanks, Murrays!)…along with my MacBook Pro, that’s all I need, right? As soon as I get it together, I’ll link you all up. Look for my un-edited (well, the best I can do until I learn this stuff) videos to come soon!

As always, you can always be a fan of Dirty Pretty Thangs on Facebook to keep up with the other goings on of this blog and my other favorite blogs/bloggers, articles, quotes and videos. You can also find me on GetGlue.com talking about TV/Music/Movies, Foursquare, retroactively checking in and Goodreads, rating and doing mini-reviews on the books that I read.

~pbg

Happy New Year Dedicated Readers!!

I hope you all made it to 2012 with heads held up high and your personal standards intact. As for me, I certainly did and I know I’m a blessed and HIGHLY FAVORED woman because of it. Haleloo…that certainly isn’t everybody’s testimony.

It was my awesome New Year’s experience that lead me to this particular post. I feel like I just have to talk to My People about our online relationships. Our eFriendships, if you will. If you’re reading this blog, I would venture to say you have friendships that so far, are only cultivated and maintained over the Internet. In 2012, I want you to try to take at least ONE of those relationships offline. Make your eFriends, your 3D Friends!

I spent the New Year’s weekend with friends that I made online. We had a great time eating, drinking and being merry. We had a wonderful warm toast to love and prosperity at midnight. It was awesome! On New Year’s Day,  I ended up at a dinner party with a bunch of older beautiful Black women (and men). As I sat and talked and listened to them, I felt like I was being bathed in wisdom.

Side note: Oh, yes. That food was the BOMB dot COM. Can you believe I actually tried not to eat because it was first time meeting those folks. I gave that up REAL QUICK when I tasted those greens! LAWD!! Heavenly is what they were! I’m mad I didn’t bring a plate home with me.

There’s something to be said about being in the physical presence of friends and absorbing the energy that you already know is there. As much as I love these Internets, there is nothing like unplugging for a while and meeting up. It’s very life-affirming and makes me feel “real”. It makes me feel a lot more connected than Twitter, Tumblr, Facebook and other social media platforms ever have. While I thank Former Vice President Al Gore for inventing the Internet (what, y’all ain’t know that? learn yourselves some knowledge this year), I really don’t want to depend on technology to build the realness of the Love that I carry into my friendships. It’s reasonable support but if you really mean what you say, then you will have to live in 3D with your Loves.

I challenge My Dedicated Readers to take at least ONE of your online friendships into the physical world in 2012.

I know it can be scary, but brave (and smart, of course) and do it anyway. I can speak from personal experience that you have more of a chance to make a life-long friend than meeting some lyin’ ass Internet Creeper. Would I lie to My People?? Nawl.

• Have you made any cool friends on the Internet?
• Met any azzholes or creeps?
• How do you feel about meeting folks you meet online?

~pbg