The other night I was out with my friend Kellie. We stopped in a 7-Eleven and happened upon a very crass and dusty Black man. He had to have been all of 35 years-old and had some fuzzy straight back cornrows. His entire essence gave me the impression that he’s either just finishing a stint in jail or about start one, undoubtedly related to unpaid child support or a botched robbery. This guy thought he’d talk very loudly about defecation in front of a few pretty women, no doubt to garner some attention and wow us with his charm. He defended his prepubescent potty humor chatter by saying “It’s natural!” Yeah, it is but let’s not pretend that if I had started talking about menstruation or childbirth he wouldn’t have fallen to pieces. I turned around to get a little cash for the evening from the ATM and when I was done, this grown ass Dust Bunny was still talking, being a complete jerk,  but had turned his attention to Kellie. So I frowned at his lameness. I’d had about enough of him at that point. He asks me “Why you frownin’ Miss Lady?” I chuckled at his utter ridiculousness and asked him “Why are you talking??” and we walked out. He ended up passing us on the sidewalk outside and yelled over to me “Shawty, don’t ever ask me why I’m talkin’ again.” Boy, bye…with your wack delayed response. Check this out:

Me: “Sir. Really? What are you gonna do? Like, for real?”

Him: “I ain’t gonna do nothin’; I ain’t gotta do nothin’.”

Me: “OK then. Gone and catch up with your friend. We’re done here.”

Him: “You need to go comb your hair!”

I tell this story to illustrate the utter ridiculousness of attempting to insult someone by making statements in relation to factual information. This is the logic of the unfunny, the hurt and the desperate. Fuzzy Wuzzy tried to come for me by saying that my hair was unkempt and needed combing. “Nappyheaded”, right? So original. So ironic. But the truth of the matter is I didn’t not comb my hair before I left home. I usually don’t because that’s not how I care for my hair. I’ve also been “insulted” (mostly by Angry Ugly Bitter Men) by being called “fat”, “short”, “Black”, some derivative of “old” (stop guessing at my age because you will never be right) and making mention of my wigs.

This is the laziest bullshyt I’ve ever had thrown my way.

Look, when you get mad and start making statements of fact about someone in order to alleviate your little hurt-ass feelings, you look like a fool. ESPECIALLY when you do it in a public forum (on the street/Twitter/Facebook/My blog comment sections). Calling a Black girl “Black” or a Fat Girl “fat” is silly and bland. No one is impressed. Telling a Naturalista to “go comb her hair” isn’t insulting, it’s nonsensical. Same for calling a woman in her 30’s “old”. I mean, that may make sense if you’re like 19 or have the mentality of a teenager. Either way, as a rational woman, there is simply no way I can respond to any of that and not look as shamefully stupid as the one attempting to hurl the insults. I would not even begin to waste the glory of my eviscerating wit on someone who will NEVER ever be a worthy opponent. You are King Zero No Higher of The Loser Brigade.

Besides, those things you point out to try to hurt my feelings are the very things that made you notice me in the first place, right? You just didn’t anticipate being so attracted to them. Make the world a better place and go deal with your issues.

~pbg

For some reason, some of the parents of the kids in my class at work have decided that my first name requires an apostrophe. Not that I’ve ever on that job or any time in my entire life written or signed my name like this:

Ca’Shawn

But apparently, folks at the job place assume that my name is supposed to look like that. Why? I feel like it has EVERYTHING to do with the fact that I am a Black Girl and the assumptions people like to make about our names. Say what you will about me and my assumptions, but there is nothing you can say that will make me think otherwise. People swear they know Black Girls, despite the fact that we are erased and disregarded more than anybody else on the planet.

And more than I hate seeing that Random Apostrophe just thrown into my name, I hate that the assumption is made that it should be there, especially if you’ve never seen it before.

FACT: I am too old to have a Random Apostrophe in my name. 

I am of the generation of Random Capitalizations. Black Girls born between 1969 and 1982 don’t have Random Apostrophes in our names. That particular brand of creativity wasn’t even en vogue yet. But I can’t tell you how many LaJuans, LaShawns, LaRaes, ShaRondas, etc that I went all through school with over the years.

 

But yeah, kill the Random Apostrophe, because I’m a Black Girl Gen Xer and my name is my name.

~pbg

I was recently contacted by the Public Relations Director at Dr.Miracle’s and asked if I’d be interested in reviewing their new product line, Curl Care, for kinky/curly/wavy hair. I said “Sure”, since I am a blogger with natural hair (not a “Natural Hair Blogger”). I was provided these products free of charge in exchange for my honest review.

Here’s what Dr.Miracle’s has to say about their new Curl Care products:

Dr. Miracle’s, a leader in the ethnic hair care category, introduces Curl Care by Dr. Miracle’s, its first-ever specialty collection designed specifically to treat and maintain natural, curly, and wavy hair.

A new trend is in the air: Texture is taking over! With more than 50% of African-American women no longer chemically-relaxing their hair, and the multicultural community embracing their curly hair textures, the need for treatment and styling products designed to preserve and enhance one’s natural hair is at an all-time high.

Rocking one’s homegrown waves, curls, coils, and kinks has become more than just a widespread style preference and a money-saver when it comes to salon visits; it’s a lifestyle. When investing one’s money, time, and energy into their beauty regimen, it’s essential to receive the right tools from a brand that she knows gets the job done. That’s why Dr. Miracle’s has created a line of products guaranteed to help users get and keep long-lasting, healthy, beautiful curls. Presenting Curl Care by Dr. Miracle’s…

The line boasts Dr. Miracle’s unique honey and vitamin complex formula, which is
guaranteed to help hold curls for up to 12 hours. Each Curl Care product contains natural
ingredients and oils formulated to deliver the same quality results characteristic of all Dr.
Miracle’s brand products. Key nutrients, vitamins, and proteins vital to hair health, like
Jojoba, Coconut and Safflower Oils, Aloe, and Panthenol, were also infused into each
unique formula to moisturize, condition, and define for healthy, beautiful curls.
Rehydrating Shampoo (12 Fl Oz; $9.49)—Formulated with Vitamins A, E, and Panthenol,
use this low-suds shampoo at least once a week to hydrate curls without stripping essential
oils.
Nourishing Conditioner (12 Fl Oz; $9.49)—Blended with Coconut, Jojoba and Vitamin E to
moisturize, condition and soften each curl. Use this conditioner as a follow up to our Rehydrating Shampoo.

Frizz Control Serum (4 Fl Oz; $8.99)—Rich in Vitamin A and Olive Oil, use this
lightweight, non-greasy serum to fight tough humidity and curl shrinkage while it smooths
and adds shine.
Soft Hold Crème (12 Oz; $9.49)—Formulated with Aloe to soften and improve elasticity,
use this styling crème to individually define and hold curls. Perfect for styling two-strand
twists or other natural styles.
Weightless Moisturizing Crème (8 Oz; $8.99)—Blended with Coconut & Vitamin E, use
this lightweight, fast-absorbing crème to moisturize and add a natural shine while styling
curls.
Boosting & Defining Leave In Conditioner (8 Fl Oz; $8.99)—Infused with Jojoba and
Proteins, this leave-in conditioner detangles hair into soft, bouncy curls, helping to add definition to your curls.

Curl Care by Dr. Miracle’s arrives March 2012 at local drug chains, beauty supplies stores,
and online at www.drmiracles.com.

 

 

I will say that the packaging of the Curl Care products is very nice. I like the logo and all that. The products come in containers that are good sized and easily stored in drawers, cabinets or on shelves.

Curl Care by Dr.Miracles, sitting pretty on my vanity

I decided to do this review properly, I would use nothing but the Curl Care products for my entire hair care regimen. I usually use products from different lines when I do my hair because rarely do I like EVERYTHING that one company makes. So I took the Hydrating Shampoo and the Nourishing Conditioner to the shower with me so I could wash/condition/detangle, which is my Step One.

My hair before Dr.Miracles' Curl Care

The Hydrating Shampoo wasn’t anything special as far as shampoo goes. I felt like my hair was clean after using it. My problems with the Curl Care products began with the Nourishing Conditioner! OMG…this stuff is so medicated, the scent almost knocked me to the floor. I’d had a stuffy nose for about three days and while I was detangling my hair, my sinuses started draining. I wondered to myself “What’s the active ingredient in this stuff, Vick’s Vapor Rub??” Not only did the product smell awful, it actually had my head burning a little bit. I felt like someone had tricked me into getting a relaxer! I was so glad to rinse that stuff out. Conditioner is not supposed to smell or feel like that. That Curl Care Nourishing Conditioner gets a big fat “F” from me.

Look at me. I look horrified. Scared for my kinks!

Close-up of the Nourishing Conditioner in my hair

After drying my hair with a T-shirt to get most of the water out, I applied the Weightless Moisturizing Crème to seal in the moisture from the water, then Boosting and Defining Leave-In Conditioner.

Curl Care Weightless Moisturizing Creme

Boosting and Defining Leave-In Conditioner

These products weren’t so bad, except they too have the same heavy medicated smell. I don’t like that all. Healthy hair doesn’t smell like medicine. I think they’re really taking the whole “Dr.Miracles” thing too literally. I don’t want my hair to smell like some kind of science fair experiment.

My hair with the Moisturizing Creme and Leave-In Conditioner in it.

I decided to do my favorite style, a braid-out. I usually achieve this big fluffy textured Afro look by applying a product that will give good hold and definition then either cornrowing my hair or putting in a few box braids. I rubbed the Curl Care Soft Hold Crème through my hair section by section as I braided my hair and then when each braid was finished, I rubbed the Frizz Control Serum down the length of each braid and put a satin-covered roller on the end.

My braids to set my style.

I don’t know how the style will turn out quite yet, but I honestly don’t anticipate any disasters. These two styling products feel like they will make my hair look good, but since they have that weird medicated smell like the others, I wouldn’t be surprised if they dried my hair out. Ugh…that will be something I’ll have to fix.

For me, the care a product gives my hair is paramount. Style is secondary because hair that isn’t cared for properly and becomes unhealthy due to using products that aren’t good won’t really look good either. I am not satisfied at all with the Curl Care products by Dr.Miracle’s. They don’t make my hair feel loved or cared for at all. These products seem to make the assumption that kinky/curly/wavy hair is “sick” and needs to be “cured” with a whole bunch of medicated goop. That’s not what’s up, Doc.

I’m sitting under the dryer now so I can possibly have a hairdo for work tomorrow, so I will post pictures the results of my braid out using the Curl Care by Dr.Miracles  styling products on Little Dirty Pretty Thangs in a day or two. But I can honestly say I wouldn’t recommend this line of  products to anyone. I definitely won’t be using them again. Curl Care is NOT what the “doctor” ordered for my hair.

~pbg

I was at work sitting in the break room checking my Facebook when I found out via my newsfeed that Don Cornelius had died today, in an apparent suicide. Just in case you’re totally un-hip and an unprecedented BAMMA, Don Cornelius created “Soul Train” back in the early 1970s and for decades it was the #1 place on TV to showcase Black Music and all other elements of Black Culture, from, fashion, hairstyles, language, dance, etc. Go check it out on Youtube and get your entire life!

It was such a shock that I felt like someone had kicked me in the gut. All the air was knocked out of me. The legendary creator and host of Soul Train was gone, and in such a sad way. I said a quick prayer for a Peaceful Journey, hoping that whatever sadness enveloped him to the point of suffocation had finally released him in transition. Depression hurts, y’all. Sometimes folks believe that killing themselves is the only way to make the pain go away. Please remember to Love. Always in every way.

Then I started to think about what the iconic Black dance & music show Soul Train has meant to me in my life. It was a very vivid and important part of my early childhood. I remember that the very first time I’d ever laid eyes on Michael Jackson, it was when he was performing on Soul Train with his brothers. I think I was about 4 or 5 years old, so it had to have been 1977 or 1978 and I knew in that moment that I was in Love. Whatever Love means to a preschooler. But outside of that heart & soul-defining moment, I remember that Soul Train was the show that we watched on Saturdays after cartoons went off and we got to see all the singers and bands that we listened to on the radio and on albums any other time. This a period of time before music videos, so Soul Train is how I found out that Black artists were amazing and beautiful to look at. As I got a little older, I was REALLY into the hair/makeup/fashion of the women I saw dancing on Soul Train. Black Girls shaking their Groove Thang and being oh so flyy in the process! So much inspiration for a little Black Girl trying to find her beauty in the sea of Whiteness that is mainstream American media. Yes, Soul Train was as much a part of my growing up as double-dutch and roller skating were. Soul Train taught me to Body Roll! To this day, whenever I hit the dance floor and get into a good groove, I like to imagine myself as some Better Than Everything Black Girl dancing on Soul Train. Twirlin’. Dippin’ Low & Bringin’ It Back Up. We all have the innovation of Mr.Don Cornelius for that. I am so grateful for the legacy that he leaves behind. Thank you.

Here’s a clip I found of Mr.Don Cornelius going down the Soul Train Line, TWICE. He says it was his very first time! The man had some moves! Check it out:

"Are You Red-dy" by Maybelline. My favorite red lippie right now.

So, this whole “Red Lipstick For Black Girls” has been an issue for me for a little while. OK, for a long while. Mainly because wearing red lipstick is allegedly yet another thing that Black Girls aren’t supposed to do. A few weeks ago, I asked around the Internet to see what other people knew about the racial & gender-based sin of wearing red lipstick. Here’s what I was told by those who chose to respond to my question “Why is it that Black Girls aren’t supposed to wear red lipstick??”

• It’s trashy
• It’s whorish
• It’s for “loose” and “fast” women
• Black Girls’ lips are too big
• Everything ain’t for everybody
• Black Girls’ Black is too black
• Define “red”

You see how MOST of that has to do with alleged sexual promiscuity and hypersexualization of Black women? Sprinkle in a bit of classism, colorism and self-hate and you get a bunch of B.S. notions on what’s good for Black Girls. A lot of these answers extended to the wearing of red clothing and even wearing red nail polish.

Now, my Wise & Beautiful Mother was the first to bring up the hurtful imagery of the Lil’ Black Sambo stereotype as a reason why some Black women probably shy away from wearing red lipstick.

This isn't even the worst picture that came up in the Google Image Search.

Just looking at how we’ve historically been  presented to the world in such an ignorant manner is painful. Now this right here [coupled with the aforementioned bullet pointed bullshyt] I can see causing a Black Girl to believe that red lipstick isn’t for her. All of this is painful, ugly and most of all, UNTRUE.

I’ve learned in my lifetime of playing in makeup, that the key to wearing it well is that you have to find out what works for you. I don’t care what race you are, if you don’t know that then you’re pretty much screwed in the Face Painting game. That goes for foundation, eyeshadows, blushes and RED LIPSTICK. It is my sincere belief that ANYBODY can wear red lipstick, but especially a Black Girl. Most colors look good on us anyway, thanks to having so much melanin in our skin. All you have to do is find the shade of red that works for you. Some of us can rock a candy apple shade, others look best with brick red. Still others may need something even deeper…or not. Just be brave and try some on. I got my first red lipstick from Sephora years ago and I’ve been in love with that color on my lips ever since.

Need some tips on how to rock your red lippie? Check out this post, “5 Foolproof Ways To Wear Red Lipstick” from contributor Sherry Blossom on Afrobella.com, one of my favorite beauty blogs.

I asked for the Black ladies who read this blog and/or follow me on Twitter/Facebook/Tumblr to submit pictures of themselves wearing their red lipsticks to show just how damn well we wear the red and I was overwhelmed by the response! This slideshow is the result of the  30-plus gorgeous pictures I received:

Yeah, I tossed a pic or three of myself in there…#YouLikeIt. And if you like “I Only Have Eyes For You” from Rahsaan Patterson’s newest album “Bleuphoria”, click here to cop it. 

Don’t let what some other fearful and misinformed person has to say about how our lips look and what the color “red” means overall scare you away from embracing such a beautiful and rich color as red. Believe in your own beauty, no matter what color you rock! Nobody gets to tell Black Girls what colors ain’t for us…ALL the colors are in us! We look good in red and the proof is right here before your eyes.

• Do you wear red lipstick? Why or Why Not?
• What have you heard in regards to Black Girls and red lipstick?
• If you do wear red lips, what’s your favorite red lippie?

~pbg