Tomato Is a Fruit

065 - Riverside

lukehand@me.com (Luke Hand) — Sun, 02 Oct 2022 06:00:51 -0400

Let’s get it on! / Bint at Safeways / Tower Hill snake / 3 letter name / Spur-winged Plovers.

064 - The Hour-long Extravaganza!

lukehand@me.com (Luke Hand) — Sun, 07 Aug 2022 01:40:31 -0400

I could only make up 12.5 minutes, unfortunately. Sorry! :)

Paratha ad.
Alec Baldwin, 4th wall.
Posit: preemptive sexual contact with animals in a structured and comprehensive way, as a way of identifying the next pandemic before it happens.
Bitter melon chunk.
Hyothetical PSA: especially dont fuck these animals.
Nobody; my horny ass.
Hydrangeras are the only species of plant that literally has sex.
Spicy food to a baby.
Middle-of-the-night thirst hits different.

Play ep - 064 - The Hour-Long Extravaganza!

063 - Right-o

lukehand@me.com (Luke Hand) — Mon, 13 Jun 2022 02:56:00 -0400

Theme. Babes and bedlamites. “I’m a Good Guy” b-side voice memo (lmk if you wanna work on this song together online). Seaside segment. Neighbours hate me ;). Right-toe. Weather. Cross about jelly. “Puffy jackets.” Closing thoughts. Mental health stigma. Credits.

Play 063 - Right-o (audio, 9.3MB)

062 - The One with the Controversial Transphobic Chunk

lukehand@me.com (Luke Hand) — Thu, 26 May 2022 05:53:25 -0400

COFFEE live broadcast on Triple R FM. I can be very petty 1 (buried with the bottle). Weird people’s licence plates. I can be very petty 2 (industry frenemies affectionately call me “Tom” as in Tom Petty). Netflix sizzle reel application: the controversial transphobic chunk. Mugs outro.

Play ep (mp3 link, 6.6 MB)

061 - G.I. Jane 2, can’t wait to see it 😏

lukehand@me.com (Luke Hand) — Sat, 21 May 2022 20:50:21 -0400

Bands renamed as eye movements. “G.I. Jane 2 - can’t wait to see it.” “Something came up” pick-up line.

▶ Ep 061 (mp3 link, 4MB)

060 - Grace

lukehand@me.com (Luke Hand) — Mon, 25 Apr 2022 04:53:56 -0400

Kate > Meghan. Directions trope. 69 Shades. Doh-nuts! “I love dogs!”

Play ep 60! [mp3 link]

059 - Gaspar “Tio” Puch-Tzek

lukehand@me.com (Luke Hand) — Sun, 05 Dec 2021 04:13:32 -0500

Monday 29th August, 2011 had been a perfect San Francisco day - a high of 68º F, clear skies with passing cloud. I was on a once-in-a-lifetime trip with one of the loves of my life, and we had spent that day in the Mission district, wandering around, drinking Four Loco, and without a care in the world.

The rest of the week would be spent busily sight-seeing, shopping, dining, and making many memories that I will forever hold as some of the happiest in my life.

But when I jolted awake in our hotel room shortly after midnight to the sound of gun fire, a completely innocent man’s life had been snuffed out for no reason just a couple of short blocks away. This is the story of the murder of Gaspar Puch-Tzek.

Play ep 059 - Gaspar “Tio” Puch-Tzek.

058 - Shel-LACKING

lukehand@me.com (Luke Hand) — Thu, 18 Nov 2021 01:54:55 -0500

noun

shellacking. shel·lack·ing | \ shə-ˈla-kiŋ | Definition of shellacking: a decisive defeat : DRUBBING

Synonyms: beating, defeat, drubbing, licking, loss, lump, overthrow, plastering, rout, trimming, trouncing, whipping.

Antonyms: success, triumph, victory, win.

https://p0.f0.n0.cdn.getcloudapp.com/items/OAuGlQWL/7ee10d8d-dd81-4b87-a84d-976b70da68bd.mp3

Play ep: https://p0.f0.n0.cdn.getcloudapp.com/items/OAuGlQWL/7ee10d8d-dd81-4b87-a84d-976b70da68bd.mp3

057 - Rat-fucked by My Own Largesse Again, Naturally

lukehand@me.com (Luke Hand) — Tue, 12 Oct 2021 21:36:09 -0400

Free Solo filmmakers are back. Ad without the word ‘deadly’ in it. Long story-short re being rat-fucked by my own largesse again.

🔊 Play 057 - Rat-fucked…

056 - LVI

lukehand@me.com (Luke Hand) — Thu, 07 Oct 2021 17:49:52 -0400

Housemate walk of shame, pre-covid. Out of French Onion dip. In stink. Sore left arm. Anti-mandate squad. “It just works!” Don’t tell a friend, don’t share on social - if you don’t want to! 🇦🇺🐨👍

LUKEHAND: https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/lukehand/id1260332519

Luke Hand Diary: https://podcasts.apple.com/au/podcast/luke-hand-diary/id1570320531

Play 056 - LVI

055 - Yeah, I Got a Couple Thoughts

lukehand@me.com (Luke Hand) — Sat, 07 Aug 2021 21:31:48 -0400

March 500-sommin 2020. 6 PM meridian. My parents doing the nasty. Finding a dead body on a complete fluke. 🙉 OH: the s-word, tee hee!! 🙊

https://p0.f0.n0.cdn.getcloudapp.com/items/9ZuQ2Nkb/375d4e9d-0544-43c0-9a46-67f021b85a2d.mp3

054 - Everybody’s an Epidemiologist 🙄

lukehand@me.com (Luke Hand) — Mon, 12 Jul 2021 05:58:25 -0400

Hello / Hairdresser with trichophillia / Walkin away / Everybody’s an Epidemiologist / a yawning gap / What the hell is Call ID?!

Play 054 - Everybody’s an Epidemiologist 🙄

053 - Quiet Building Site Meditation

lukehand@me.com (Luke Hand) — Thu, 10 Jun 2021 01:38:51 -0400

breathe

052 - Al Piede

lukehand@me.com (Luke Hand) — Sat, 08 May 2021 01:36:04 -0400

Play ep mp3

051 - Contains Swearing, Slurs, and Mature Themes

lukehand@me.com (Luke Hand) — Sat, 24 Apr 2021 02:19:40 -0400

This episode contains explicit content. Please do NOT play within earshot of children. Or millennials ;)

051 - Contains Swearing, Slurs, and Mature Themes MP3

050 - GOLD

lukehand@me.com (Luke Hand) — Wed, 14 Apr 2021 09:33:03 -0400

Irish/kiwi/aussie intro. your old man’s plums. safe words during nastee sex. this day in history - April 14. immature audience CW. Hot and Not. Millenials dont eat much soup. “Closure.”

Play 050 - GOLD.

049 - Tomato Is a Fruit

lukehand@me.com (Luke Hand) — Sun, 07 Mar 2021 22:20:20 -0500

Luke’s tinder: https://go.tinder.com/RF5txGBFklY-Luke Feedback encouraged! Ya gotta help me!! MuhammadNguyenSmith@gmail.com

Tomato Is a Fruit audio file URL.

048 - Ho-ho-home and Contents Insurance Claus

lukehand@me.com (Luke Hand) — Wed, 02 Dec 2020 21:53:34 -0500

Work bants, Frued, insurance Claus, February grateful things.

▶️ Play episode.

047 - Awesomesauce May Contain Solvent

lukehand@me.com (Luke Hand) — Sat, 21 Nov 2020 22:33:00 -0500

Sponsor: lukehandtestandtag dot com

Play ep 047

046 - 2020 Said 'Hold My Beer'

lukehand@me.com (Luke Hand) — Sun, 01 Nov 2020 01:18:02 -0400

need a coffee like a hole in the head. lazy anesthetist. 2020 has been extra. trump soundbite. woke dog whistle salesperson. L-plater news story.

Play ep 046