David Letterman ridiculed Paris Hilton on last night’s episode of Late Night, and of course we have the video for you to watch. If only he would have stepped it up a bit!

What do you think… did she deserve it? Let us know in the comments.

Jessica Biel and Shakira, unlike 99% of the useless celebrity idiots we write about on this site, have done things positive and actually worth mentioning at this year’s Clinton Global Initiative (CGI).

Jessica, along with her father Jon Biel, founded the Make the Difference Network which aims to donate $30 million in its first year (growing to $60 million in year two!) to various non-profit groups:

Jessica Biel and her father Jon Biel founded the Make the Difference Network to allow everyone to be a “grassroots philanthropist” by creating a social networking site that brings thousands of small- to medium-sized non-profits together with millions of potential donors. Users will be able to search a list of specific “wishes” posted by non-profits and then fund those wishes. After the first year, $30 million will be donated to 5,000 non-profits at an average of $500 per month. The second year should see those numbers rise to 10,000 non-profits and $60 million donated, with a two-year total of $90 million.

That’s just awesome. Just FYI their site is invitation only.

Shakira, through her ALAS Foundation (ALAS = Fundación América Latina en Acción Solidaria) has contributed $45 million to address recent natural diasasters in Nicaragua and Peru and provide additional education funding to schools and children across Latin America. From TMZ:

The sexy singer announced the donation during Friday’s Clinton Global Initiative meeting. Forty million will go to Nicaragua and Peru to address recent natural disasters there, and an additional $5 million will go to educational projects benefiting children across Latin America.

You can see all of the amazing work done at this year’s CGI by clicking this link. If only more celebs would take the positive example set by Jesse and Shakira and actually do something productive and useful for the world, they too might be worth writing about. Until then, we’ll continue to call them out for being rich, useless fuckheads.

If YOU want to do something positive through the CGI, check out their public involvement site MyCommitment.

NBC is feeling the heat of only having Heroes to draw viewers all damn week so they’re bringing back the David Hasselhoff early 80s powerhouse Knight Rider. From Variety:

NBC is bringing back “Knight Rider,” tapping Doug Liman to produce a “Transformers”-inspired reworking of the 1980s hit action-drama series about a man and his indestructible supercar.

Peacock is readying a two-hour backdoor pilot for the project, with tentative plans to air it as a telepic later this season. Liman is open to the idea of directing, assuming his feature sked allows. If the telepic clicks, a new-model “Knight Rider” could be on the air as early as next fall.

Dave Andron (”Raines”) is writing the pilot script and will serve as supervising producer alongside exec producers Liman and Dave Bartis (”The O.C.,” “Heist”) for Universal Media Studios and Dutch Oven Prods.

Success of “Transformers” had a role in inspiring NBC Entertainment chief Ben Silverman’s decision to revive “Knight.” The thinking is that smallscreen f/x have advanced to the point where it’d be feasible to have a weekly series in which cars shift shapes.

It’s also likely the new show will explore the idea of “evil” cars to offset the heroic talking K.I.T.T. car of the original skein, which starred David Hasselhoff. That said, skein is expected to essentially remain focused on the story of a single man fighting for justice with the help of his superadvanced car.

There’s also huge potential for advertiser integration. General Motors was all over “Transformers,” and it’s easy to see NBC striking a rich deal with a single automaker to serve as the exclusive auto brand for the new “Knight.” It’s understood preliminary talks have already begun.

Peacock is also veering from current conventional wisdom by moving forward with a telepic/backdoor pilot for “Knight.” Nets rarely produce telepics with an eye on turning them into series anymore, in part because the telepic has essentially disappeared from the broadcast network scene.

But NBC execs no doubt feel “Knight Rider” is enough of a pre-sold brand to lure an audience. What’s more, the telepic could serve as a good replacement for repeats come spring, perhaps replacing an encore of “Heroes” or “Bionic Woman.”

“Knight” originally aired on NBC from 1982 until 1986, with Hasselhoff playing smooth crimefighter Michael Knight. A spinoff skein, “Team Knight Rider,” aired in syndication during the 1997-98 season.

This is going to suck, just like most things NBC-related these days. Continue the decline of the stoned peacock…

The Internet’s a-blazin’ this morning with reports of a sex tape featuring Meg White of the White Stripes.

TMZ did a little investigating, and we’ve learned it’s most definitely NOT her in the tape. Fell in love with a girl!

Meg’s rep tells TMZ, “Some people have a very twisted sense of humor and this prank is in particularly bad taste. The tape circulating on the Internet as featuring Meg White is fake. It’s definitely not Meg.”

Don’t fret … she’s the same girl you’ve always known.

…but that doesn’t change the fact that the girl does look a bit like her and since she’s a fatty she has a sizable rack. It’s over in three minutes, so you should probably use both hands to try to speed things up. Video is VERY NSFW and is available after you click the continue reading link.

Your guess is as good as ours as to why Hilary Duff’s breasts look like they’ve had Reebok Pumps installed, but damn do they look shweet. Surely this is just one of those optical illusions, but we have to admit her tittybombs look just as fantastic as Victoria Beckham’s.

Hilary – share your secret with the rest of the women around so they can buy the same bras as you and please us blokes. The less flappy boobs around, the better. I can speak from the experience of seeing multiple pairs of titties in this bra that it does some eye-popping magical breast size tricks. Go get one!

It seems like Britney Spears’ PR campaign for her new album is working. The only issue we see is that it’s making her out to be a trailer trash, lowlife drug addict alcoholic parent that hates the fact she has kids.

First, the Rag is reporting that she’s been taking Ecstasy to get high and Ativan to bring her back down:

The source revealed: “It was one of Britney’s friends saying he’d seen Britney take four Ecstasy pills in the bedroom of a Hollywood Hills home during a party on August 11.

“Lynne was also told that Britney has done the drug more recently – and she’s taken Ativan, an anti-anxiety medication, to help her come down because the Ecstasy was so intense. Lynne put down the phone and froze.”

Well, whatever. I know parents that do E from time to time, although 4 caps of it is a little excessive. You’d think someone with Britney’s kind of money and connections could get some pure, intense, melt your fucking socks E that would top you off around a cap or two.

It also seems that Brit has found some helpers to push her PR along. Joey Fatone either wants to help out or wants to pull Brit’s hair as he’s invited her to his place in Miami to chill out a bit. Check it:

Joey told US TV channel Extra: “Britney, call me, come over to my house, come to Orlando, get away from it all. It’s a good thing to get out of Los Angeles.

“I think she just needs some time, some time to really heal. If you’re there, let me know. I’m here for you, sweetheart.”

BRITNEY! Fuck that dude, come on up to Canada. We’ll get you on a BC weed program and you’ll be relaxed and mellowed out before you know it. Plus you’ll have Mr. Downity to provide you with some “therapy”.

Here’s the latest pics of Mama Britney we could find. We can’t figure out if her look is improving or declining lately. We’d still it it though… hit it with the fury of an angry god. Enjoy.

Hey, Jugular. Pretty creative. And by creative, we mean lame. And by lame, we mean not even remotely “edgy” or whatever other buzzword you’re going for.

Now, if it said DON’T DIE HITLER or perhaps DON’T DIE AHMADNIDEDADNEHAJNIDAD or however the fuck his name is spelled… that might evoke the response you’re looking for.

Scott Lackey, Co-Founder/Strategic Director of Jugular, said “Our client, Canterbury Institute, has an outpatient medical approach to drug addiction that makes overnight ‘residential’ treatment centers unnecessary. Sadly, this is an age where rehab has become a revolving door.”

It’s also an age where boring ass ads like this one are a dime a dozen. Time to get a new creative director.

downity.com favorite Hayden Panettiere was a guest on Regis and Kelly the other day and in case you missed it, above is the entire eight plus minute segment.

TMZ is also scooping that while outside in an impromptu autograph session, the paparazzi were crushing in on Hayden to the point that they nearly flattened a little girl that was standing waiting for an autograph.

So what does the tiny Hayden do? Drops the F-bomb, of course. And TMZ caught it on vid, as usual… those crafty fuckers. They’re probably outside my windows right now drilling little holes into leaves to insert small cameras.

Anyway, get your Hayden fix all in one post. Enjoy!

Not much can make the night more relaxing than checking out a whole shatload of topless Lucy Pinder photos. So, here they are, courtesy of some upcoming issue of Front magazine. Never heard of ‘em. They’re probably not safe for work, but you don’t like your job anyways.

Admit it, you’d put up with less shit working at Dairy Queen and gaining 30 pounds from all the free ice cream. Now go! Fulfill your destiny, and bring me back a medium Reese Peanut Butter Cups Blizzard, you lackey.

Oh yeah, the titties. Almost forgot. Enjoy!