EMAIL Forwarded...

Funny Posts

2011-10-09T12:52:00.000+08:00

How many is a Brazillion?

2011-07-11T10:58:00.002+08:00

Donald Rumsfeld is giving the president his daily briefing. He Concludes by saying, "Yesterday, 3 Brazilian soldiers were killed in an accident"

"OH NO!" the President exclaims. "That's terrible!"

His staff sits stunned at this display of emotion, nervously watching as the President sits, head in hands. Finally he looks up and asks.......... ''How many is a Brazillion??!"

Attorney and Witness, Part 2

2011-07-11T10:56:00.002+08:00

ATTORNEY: Are you sexually active?

WITNESS: No, I just lie there.

ATTORNEY: She had three children, right?

WITNESS: Yes.

ATTORNEY: How many were boys?

WITNESS: None.

ATTORNEY: Were there any girls?

ATTORNEY: How was your first marriage terminated?

WITNESS: By death.

ATTORNEY: And by whose death was it terminated?

ATTORNEY: Can you describe the individual?

WITNESS: He was about medium height and had a beard.

ATTORNEY: Was this a male or a female?

ATTORNEY: Is your appearance here this morning pursuant to a deposition notice which I sent to your attorney?

WITNESS: No, this is how I dress when I go to work.

ATTORNEY: ALL your responses MUST be oral, OK? What school did you go to?

WITNESS: Oral.

ATTORNEY: What gear were you in at the moment of the impact?

WITNESS: Gucci sweats and Reeboks.

Hooker Parrots

2011-07-07T13:41:00.004+08:00

A lady goes to her priest one day and tells him, "Father, I have a problem. I have two female parrots, but they only know how to say one thing."

"What do they say?" the priest asks.

They say, "Hi, we're hookers! Do you want to have some fun?!"

"That's obscene!" the priest exclaimed, then he thought for a moment. "You know, I have two male talking parrots that I have taught to pray and read the Bible. Bring your two parrots over to my house, and we'll put them in the cage with Francis and Job. My parrots can teach your parrots to praise and worship, and your parrots are sure to stop saying that phrase in no time."

"Thank you," the woman said, "this may be the solution."

The next day, she brought her female parrots to the priest's house. As he ushered her in, she saw that his two male parrots were inside their cage holding rosary beads and praying. Impressed, she walked over and placed her parrots in with them.

After a few minutes, the female parrots cried out in unison: "Hi, we're hookers! Do you want to have some fun?"

There was stunned silence.

Shocked, one male parrot looked over at the other male parrot and exclaimed, "Put the beads away, Frankie, our prayers have been answered!"

April Fools

2011-07-07T13:30:00.000+08:00

A young blind boy is being tucked into bed by his mother. The mom says "Now Billy, pray really hard tonight and tomorrow, your wish will come true!"

Billy says, "Ok mommy." and goes to sleep.

The next morning, Billy wakes up and screams "MOMMY! I'm still blind, my wish didn't come true!" and mom answered, "I know - April Fools!"

Call Center Jokes

2011-07-04T17:53:00.000+08:00

Customer: "I've been calling 700-1000 for two days and can't get through; can you help?"
Operator: "Where did you get that number, sir?"
Customer: "It's on the door of your business."
Operator: "Sir, those are the hours that we’re open."

Caller: "Can you give me the telephone number for Jack?"
Operator: "I'm sorry, sir, I don't understand who you are talking about."
Caller: "On page 1, section 5, of the user guide it clearly states that I need to unplug the fax machine from the AC wall socket and telephone Jack before cleaning. Now, can you give me the number for Jack?"
Operator: "I think it means the telephone plug on the wall."

Tech Support: "I need you to right-click on the Open Desktop."

Customer: "OK."

Tech Support: "Did you get a pop-up menu?"

Customer: "No."

Tech Support: "OK. Right-Click again. Do you see a pop-up menu?"

Customer: "No."

Tech Support: "OK, sir. Can you tell me what you have done up until this point?"

Customer: "Sure. You told me to write 'click' and I wrote 'click'."

Tech Support: "OK. At the bottom left hand side of your screen, can you see the 'OK' button displayed?"

Customer: "Wow! How can you see my screen from there?"

Directory Enquiries
Caller: "I'd like the number of the Argo Fish Bar, please"
Operator: "I'm sorry, there's no listing. Are you sure that the spelling is correct?"
Caller: "Well, it used to be called the Bargo Fish Bar but the 'B' fell off."

Then there was the caller who asked for a knitwear company in Woven.
Operator: "Woven? Are you sure?"
Caller: "Yes. That's what it says on the label -- Woven in Scotland "

On another occasion, a man making heavy breathing sounds from a phone box told a worried operator: "I haven't got a pen, so I'm steaming up the window to write the number on."

Office Timetable

2011-07-04T17:44:00.000+08:00

Attorney and Witness

2011-06-29T15:15:00.002+08:00

ATTORNEY: On July 25th you went by the duck enclosure on your farm.

WITNESS: Yes

ATTORNEY: So you passed within a few yards of the enclosure

WITNESS: Yes.

ATTORNEY: Did you notice anything special?

WITNESS: Yes.

ATTORNEY: Could you tell us what you saw?

WITNESS: I saw George.

ATTORNEY: You saw George, the accused in this case?

WITNESS: Yes.

ATTORNEY: Can you tell us what George was doing?

WITNESS: Yes.

ATTORNEY: So, please tell us.

WITNESS: He had his thing in one of the ducks.

ATTORNEY: His ‘thing’?

WITNESS: You know… his dic… I mean his penis.

ATTORNEY: You passed near to the duck enclosure, the light was good, you were sober, you have good eyesight, and you clearly saw what you just described?

WITNESS: Yes.

ATTORNEY: Did you say something to him?

WITNESS: Yes.

ATTORNEY: What did you say to him?

WITNESS: I said “Morning George.”

Police Medic

2011-06-23T23:04:00.000+08:00

A man walks into a bar...

2011-06-23T14:41:00.000+08:00

Case 1:

A man walks into a bar with a steering wheel in his trousers. The Bartender says, "Why do have a steering wheel in your pants?" The man replies "I don't know, but it’s driving me nuts".

Case 2:

A man walks into a bar, sits down and orders a Bud. He says "Give me a beer before problems start!" The bartender doesn't understand but gives the man a beer.

After 15 minutes the man orders a beer again saying "Give me a beer before problems start!" The bartender looks a little bit confused but pours the man a beer.

This goes on the whole night and after the 15th beer the bartender is totally confused and asks the man "What do you mean with before problems start? And when are you going to pay for all the beers you drunk."

The man answers "You see, now the problems start!"

18 Poisonous Quotes by Simon Cowell

2010-06-02T19:41:00.003+08:00

...IN AMERICAN IDOL...

OH...REALLY???...

It sounded like cats jumping off the Empire State Building...

You have just invented a new form of torture...

I'm going to reach out with a hook if you don't shut up...

If you had lived 2000 years ago and sung like that, I think they would have stoned you...

There's only so much punishment a human can take. I can't take anymore...

You killed my favorite (song)...

You're like a hamster trying to be a tiger...

I think you looked as if you were half-asleep throughout the song...

I couldn't understand a single word. You could have been singing in Norwegian...

That's the direction I want you to take. Right, then right (indicating route out of the room)...

So you're a talented loony...

Imagine 22 horses and a donkey (racing), you just wouldn't stand a chance...

What is the right competition for him? 'Wheel of Fortune'?...

It's like you were drunk. I'm not talking 1 or 2 bottles, I'm talking a crate...

You're like a singing yo-yo, one minute you're down, one minute you're up...

Your personality is being sucked out of you...

It actually gave me a headache...

That was extraordinary, Unfortunately, extraordinary bad!...

WHO CARES??!!!... :D

Crazy Chinese, Part 2

2010-05-17T17:38:00.003+08:00

Continued...

Hahahah.... :D

Crazy Chinese, Part 1

2010-05-15T17:36:00.002+08:00

Well, you have to be crazy at least once in your life...

To be continued...

Fun with Graphic Art, Part 2

2010-05-13T17:33:00.003+08:00

Continued...

Fun with Graphic Art, Part 1

2010-05-11T17:27:00.002+08:00

When graphic artists get bored...

To be continued...

Which Cake Are You?

2010-05-10T17:41:00.002+08:00

If all of the desserts listed below were sitting in front of you, which would you choose? Pick your dessert, then look to see what Psychiatrists think about you! (Pick only one...)

OK - Now that you've made your choice, scroll down to see what research says about you!!!

ANGEL FOOD CAKE... Sweet, loving, cuddly. You love all warm and fuzzy items. A little nutty at times. Sometimes you need an ice cream cone at the end of the day. Others perceive you as being childlike and immature at times.

BROWNIES... You are adventurous, love new ideas, are a champion of under dogs and a slayer of dragons. When tempers flare up, you whip out your sabre. You are always the oddball with a unique sense of humor and direction. You tend to be very loyal.

LEMON MERINGUE... Smooth, sexy, & articulate with your hands, you are an excellent after-dinner speaker and a good teacher. But don't try to walk and chew gum at the same time. A bit of a diva at times, but you have many friends.

VANILLA CAKE WITH CHOCOLATE ICING... Fun-loving, sassy, humorous. Not very grounded in life; very indecisive and lack motivation. Everyone enjoys being around you, but you are a practical joker. Others should be cautious in making you mad. However, you are a friend for life.

STRAWBERRY SHORTCAKE... Romantic, warm, loving. You care about other people and can be counted on in a pinch. You tend to melt. You can be overly emotional and annoying at times.

CHOCOLATE ON CHOCOLATE... Sexy; always ready to give and receive. Very creative, adventurous, ambitious, and passionate. You can appear to have a cold exterior but are warm on the inside. Not afraid to take chances. Will not settle for anything average in life. Love to laugh.

ICE CREAM... You like sports, whether it be baseball, football, basketball, or soccer. If you could, you would like to participate, but you enjoy watching sports. You don't like to give up the remote control. You tend to be self-centered and high maintenance.

CARROT CAKE... You are a very fun loving person, who likes to laugh. You are fun to be with. People like to hang out with you. You are a very warm hearted person and a little quirky at times. You have many loyal friends.

Poor Husband...

2010-05-01T19:09:00.005+08:00

This is so cute... :D

Wife: Where is the money???!!

Wife: Show me your pockets!!!

Husband: I will not give you the money!!! You always spend all of my salary! Booohoooo!!!
Wife: Ahhh ... there it is.

Wife: Okay now move a side. I'm going shopping...

Wife: Thanks Sweetheart! Bye! :)

Realistic Sculptures by Ron Mueck

2010-04-29T18:59:00.002+08:00

Realistic sculptures created by Ron Mueck from Australia.

Cannot believe it. So REAL!!...

Snake Devours Human

2010-04-27T17:42:00.003+08:00

A giant snake devours a human being...Can you believe it??

WOW..!!!

10 Wonders of the New China

2010-04-10T13:18:00.002+08:00

It's a hotbed of innovative architecture, from diaphanous theaters to buildings heated and cooled by water. China's current building boom is doing more than sucking up the world's supply of steel -- it's creating a stage for some of today's boldest architecture and engineering. Take a tour of the 10 of the most intriguing examples.

The Commune, Beijing

Even if the Commune didn't sit beside that wonder of the ancient world, the Great Wall of China, it would still qualify as a wonder. The complex includes houses by 12 of Asia's leading architects. It was conceived by married real-estate developers Zhang Xin and Pan Shiyi, who gave each architect a $1 million budget. Shigeru Ban, the Japanese architect most famous for the paper houses he designed for refugees of the Kobe earthquake, designed the Furniture House, featuring the laminated plywood typically used for modular furniture, and China's Yung Ho Chang created the Split House, which takes the idea of a boxy dwelling, slices it in half, and spreads it out like a fan.

The Commune is now operated as a boutique hotel by the Germany luxury hotel group Kempinski, which is responsible for an upcoming expansion, which will feature 21 homes (including replications of the originals). One element will remain untouched in the new development: the Commune's private pedestrian trails, which trace untouched sections of the Great Wall.

Beijing International Airport, Beijing
Foster & Partners.

According to the U.S. Embassy to China, the country will be building 108 new airports between 2004 and 2009 -- including what will be the world's largest: the Beijing International Airport, designed by Foster & Partners. Set to open at the end of 2007, in time for the Beijing Olympics in 2008, the airport terminal will cover more than 1 million square meters, giving it a bigger footprint than the Pentagon.

It's designed to handle 43 million passengers a year initially and 55 million by 2015, figures that will probably push the new facility into the ranks of the top 10 busiest airports, going by the 2004 numbers from the Airports Council International. Given the scale and traffic, Foster & Partners focused on the traveler's experience, making sure that walking distances are short, for instance.

Building on Foster's experience designing Hong Kong's new mega-airport, the massive Chek Lap Kok, the sprawling Beijing terminal is housed under a single roof. To help passengers distinguish between different sections of the vast space, skylights cast different shades of yellow and red light across walls -- a subtle but innovative navigational aid. The architects also kept sustainability in mind: An environmental-control system reduces carbon emissions, and skylights situated on a south-east axis lessen solar heat, keeping the building cool.

Shanghai World Financial Center, Shanghai
Kohn Pedersen Fox Architects.

Rising in the Lujiazhui financial district in Pudong, the Shanghai World Financial Center is a tower among towers. The elegant 101-story skyscraper will be (for a moment, at least) the world's tallest when completed in early 2008.

One of the biggest challenges of building tall is creating a structure that can withstand high winds. The architects devised an innovation solution to alleviate wind pressure by adding a rectangular cut-out at the building's apex. Not only does the open area help reduce the building's sway but it also will be home to the world's highest outdoor observation deck -- a 100th-floor vista that will take vertigo to new heights.

National Swimming Center, Beijing
PTW and Ove Arup.

The striking exterior of the National Swimming Center, being constructed for the 2008 Olympic Games and nicknamed, the "Water Cube," is made from panels of a lightweight form of Teflon that transforms the building into an energy-efficient greenhouse-like environment. Solar energy will also be used to heat the swimming pools, which are designed to reuse double-filtered, backwashed pool water that's usually dumped as waste.

Excess rainwater will also be collected and stored in subterranean tanks and used to fill the pools. The complex engineering system of curvy steel frames that form the structure of the bubble-like skin are based on research into the structural properties of soap bubbles by two physicists at Dublin's Trinity College. The unique structure is designed to help the building withstand nearly any seismic disruptions.

Central Chinese Television CCTV, Beijing
OMA/Ole Scheeren and Rem Koolhaas.

The design of the new Central Chinese Television (CCTV) headquarters defies the popular conception of a skyscraper -- and it broke Beijing's building codes and required approval by a special review panel. The standard systems for engineering gravity and lateral loads in buildings didn't apply to the CCTV building, which is formed by two leaning towers, each bent 90 degrees at the top and bottom to form a continuous loop.

The engineer's solution is to create a structural "tube" of diagonal supports. The irregular pattern of this "diagrid" system reflects the distribution of forces across the tube's surface. Designed by Rem Koolhaas and Ole Scheeren and engineered by Ove Arup, the new CCTV tower rethinks what a skyscraper can be.

Linked Hybrid, Beijing
Steven Holl Architects; Li Hu, lead architect.

Linked Hybrid, which will house 2,500 people in 700 apartments covering 1.6 million square feet, is a model for large-scale sustainable residential architecture. The site will feature one of the world's largest geothermal cooling and heating systems, which will stabilize the temperature within the complex of eight buildings, all linked at the 20th floor by a "ring" of service establishments, like cafés and dry cleaners. A set of dual pipes pumps water from 100 meters below ground, circulating the liquid between the buildings' concrete floors.

The result: The water-circulation system serves as a giant radiator in the winter and cooling system in the summer. It has no boilers to supply heat, no electric air conditioners to supply cool. The apartments also feature gray-water recycling -- a process that's just starting to catch on in Beijing in much smaller buildings -- to filter waste water from kitchen sinks and wash basins back into toilets.

Dongtan Eco City, Dongtan
Masterplan by Arup, for the Shanghai Industrial Investment Corp.

Developed by the Shanghai Industrial investment Corp., Dongtan Eco City, roughly the size of Manhattan, will be the world's first fully sustainable cosmopolis when completed in 2040. Like Manhattan, it's situated on an island -- the third-largest in China. Located on the Yangtze River, Dongtan is within close proximity of the bustle of Shanghai.

By the time the Shanghai Expo trade fair opens in 2010, the city's first phase should be completed, and 50,000 residents will call Dongtan home-sweet-sustainable-home. The goals to be accomplished in the next five years: systems for water purification, waste management, and renewable energy. An infrastructure of roads will connect the former agricultural land with Shanghai.

Olympic Stadium, Beijing
Herzog & de Meuron.

Sports stadiums have long followed the enduring design of one of the original wonders of the world, Rome's Coliseum. Herzog & de Meuron's National Stadium in Beijing is an attempt to rethink the classic sports-arena layout for more ecologically correct times.

The Swiss architects (of Tate Modern fame) wanted to provide natural ventilation for the 91,000-seat structure -- perhaps the largest "eco-friendly" sports stadium designed to date. To achieve this, they set out to create a building that could function without a strictly enclosed shell, yet also provide constant shelter for the audience and athletes alike.

To solve these design problems, they looked to nature for inspiration. The stadium's outer grid resembles a bird's nest constructed of delicately placed branches and twigs. Each discrete space within the facility, from restrooms to restaurants, is constructed as an independent unit within the outer lattice -- making it possible to encase the entire complex with an open grid that allows for natural air circulation. The architects also incorporated a layer of translucent membrane to fill any gaps in the lacy exterior.

Donghai Bridge, Shanghai/Yangshan Island

China Zhongtie Major Bridge Engineering Group, Shanghai # 2 Engineering Co., Shanghai Urban Construction Group.

A key phase in the development of the world's largest deep-sea port was completed when China's first cross-sea bridge -- the 20-mile, six-lane Donghai Bridge -- was officially opened in December, 2005. Stretching across the East China Sea, the graceful cable-stay structure connects Shanghai to Yangshan Island, set to become China's first free-trade port (and the world's largest container port) upon its completion in 2010.

To provide a safer driving route in the typhoons and high waves known to hit the region, Donghai Bridge is designed in an S-shape. The structure, reported by Shanghai Daily to have cost $1.2 billion, will hold its title of China's -- and one of the world's -- longest over-sea bridge for only a couple of years, though. In 2008, the nearby 22-mile Hangzhou Bay Transoceanic Bridge, which also begins (or ends, depending on your journey) in Shanghai, will earn the superlative.

National Grand Theater, Beijing
Paul Andreu and ADP.

Located near Tiananmen Square, the 490,485-square-foot glass-and-titanium National Grand Theater, scheduled to open in 2008, seems to float above a man-made lake. Intended to stand out amid the Chinese capital's bustling streets and ancient buildings, the structure has garnered criticism among Bejing's citizens for clashing with classic landmarks like the Monument to the People's Heroes (dedicated to revolutionary martyrs), the vast home of the National People's Congress, or Tiananmen Gate itself (the Gate of Heavenly Peace).

French architect Paul Andreu is no stranger to controversy -- or to innovative forms. A generation ago, in 1974, his untraditional design for Terminal 1 of Paris's Charles de Gaulle airport was criticized for its unusual curves, yet Andreu's groundbreaking, futuristic building later was seen to distinguish de Gaulle from more generic European and international air hubs. (The same airport's Terminal 2E, also designed by Andreu, gained attention in 2004 when it collapsed, tragically killing four people.)

Beijing's daring National Grand Theater is as much a spectacle as the productions that will be staged inside in the 2,416-seat opera house, the 2,017-seat concert hall, and the 1,040-seat theater. At night, the semi-transparent skin will give passersby a glimpse at the performance inside one of three auditoriums, a feature that highlights the building's public nature.

Article by Reena Jana

Drink Cold Water After Meal = CANCER

2010-04-01T07:42:00.002+08:00

Drinking Cold water after meal = Cancer!

For those who like to drink cold water, this article is applicable to you. It is nice to have a cup of cold drink after a meal. However, the cold water will solidify the oily stuff that you have just consumed. It will slow down the digestion.

Once this "sludge" reacted with the acid, it will break down and be absorbed by the intestine faster than the solid food. It will line the intestine.

Very soon, this will turn into fats and lead to cancer. It is best to drink hot soup or warm water after a meal.

A serious note about heart attacks...

Women should know that not every heart attack symptom is going to be the left arm hurting. Be aware of intense pain in the jaw line. You may never have the first chest pain during the course of a heart attack. Nausea and intense sweating are also common symptoms. 60% of people who have a heart attack while they are asleep do not wake up. Pain in the jaw can wake you from a sound sleep. Let's be careful and be aware. The more we know, the better chance we could survive...

Let's say it's 6.15 pm and you're driving home. Suddenly you start experiencing severe pain in your chest that starts to radiate out into your arm and up into your jaw. You are only about five miles from the hospital nearest your home. Unfortunately you don't know if you'll be able to make it that far. You have been trained in CPR, but the guy that taught the course did not tell you how to perform it on yourself.

HOW TO SURVIVE A HEART ATTACK WHEN ALONE:

Since many people are alone when they suffer a heart attack, without help, the person whose heart is beating improperly and who begins to feel faint, has only about 10 seconds left before losing consciousness. However, these victims can help themselves by coughing repeatedly and very vigorously. A deep breath should be taken before each cough, deep and prolonged, as when producing sputum from deep inside the chest. A breath and a cough must be repeated about every two seconds without let-up until help arrives, or until the heart is felt to be beating normally again. Deep breaths get oxygen into the lungs and coughing movements squeeze the heart and keep the blood circulating. The squeezing pressure on the heart also helps it regain normal rhythm. In this way, heart attack victims can get to a hospital. Tell as many other people as possible about this.

It could save their lives!!

Asian She-Male...

2010-03-25T17:52:00.002+08:00

Japan She-male...

Taiwan She-male...

Korean She-male...

Thailand She-male...

Singapore She-male...

Hey Guy, how about CHINA She-male?????

China...She-male...haha....

This Only Happens In...

2010-03-21T22:12:00.002+08:00

Some pictures show the specialty of a country which happens only in that country...Here's the collection of some rare pics...Enjoy...

This happens only in India...

This happens only in China...

This happens only in Hawaii...

This happens only in Indonesia...

This happens only in Texas...

This happens only in Thailand...

This happens only in Australia...

This happens only in India...

This happens only in Japan...

This happens only in Pakistan...

Amazing Bridge

2010-03-18T23:06:00.002+08:00

Amazing design

You gotta see this bridge....

How would you like to walk across (and under) this bridge.....

The bridge (or should it be called tunnel) goes under water to allow movement of ships. In order for ships to pass, this bridge is half under the water. You drive down in the water and then come out on the other side. Truly a marvelous piece of engineering!

This bridge is between Sweden and Denmark.

Picture taken from the side of Sweden.

Malaysian English VS. Britons English

2010-03-16T00:02:00.002+08:00

A Malaysian says, "Who says our English is terrible? Just see below - Ours is simple, short, concise, straight-to-point, effective etc..."

WHEN GIVING A CUSTOMER BAD NEWS

Britons: I'm sorry, Sir, but we don't seem to have the sweater you want in your size, but if you give me a moment, I can call the other outlets for you.

Malaysians: No Stock.

RETURNING A CALL

Britons: Hello, this is John Smith. Did anyone page for me a few moments ago?

Malaysians: Hello, who page?

ASKING SOMEONE TO MAKE WAY

Britons: Excuse me, I'd like to get by. Would you please make way?

Malaysians: S-kew me

WHEN SOMEONE OFFERS TO PAY

Britons: Hey, put your wallet away, this drink is on me.

Malaysians:No-need, lah.

WHEN ASKING FOR PERMISSION

Britons: Excuse me, but do you think it would be possible for me to enter through this door?

Malaysians: (pointing the door) can ar?

WHEN ENTERTAINING

Britons: Please make yourself right at home.

Malaysians: Don't be shy, lah!

WHEN DOUBTING SOMEONE

Britons: I don't recall you giving me the money.

Malaysians: Where got?

WHEN DECLINING AN OFFER

Britons: I'd prefer not to do that, if you don't mind.

Malaysians: Don't want la...

IN DISAGREEING ON A TOPIC OF DISCUSSION

Britons: Err. Tom, I have to stop you there. I understand where you're

coming from, but I really have to disagree with what you said about the issue.

Malaysians: You mad, ah?

WHEN ASKING SOMEONE TO LOWER THEIR VOICE

Britons: Excuse me, but could you please ! lower your voice, I'm trying to concentrate over here.

Malaysians: Shut up lah!

WHEN ASKING SOMEONE IF HE/SHE KNOWS YOU

Britons: Excuse me, but I noticed you staring at me for some time.. Do I know you?

Malaysians: See what, see what?

WHEN ASSESSING A TIGHT SITUATION

Britons: We seem to be in a bit of a predicament at the moment.

Malaysians: Die-lah!!

WHEN TRYING TO FIND OUT WHAT HAD HAPPENED

Britons: Will someone tell me what has just happened?

Malaysians: Wat happen Why like that....

WHEN SOME ONE DID SOMETHING WRONG

Britons: This isn't the way to do it here let me show you,

Malaysians: like that also don't know how to do!!!!

WHEN ONE IS ANGRY

Britons: Would you mind not disturbing me

Malaysians:Celaka u

**Please use Google Translate to translate the malay words... :D