Emmanuelle Undine: A Siren Laid Bare

Fucker's Block

2013-05-23T17:13:00.002-04:00

Funny thing: This is my "wedding underwear."

If you’ve been missing your Thursday early morning blog post (we all have our rituals), you can blame me for not putting out. The problem? I’ve come down with a bad case of fucker’s block. Lately, I’ve been too horny to write – too horny to sleep soundly, even.

Over the last couple of weeks a handful of seeds that my husband and I tossed to the winds have begun to take root….

We will be hooking up with Dani + Sean next weekend, this time at their place. I’m thinking of showing up in a black trench coat, stilettos, and a garter belt with back-seam stockings…. I hear Sean likes his women submissive…. And Dani has given me signs that she is interested in pursuing a sideline thing with me…. (I am a patient hunter. Besides, she’s worth the wait.)

Pornucopia

2013-05-16T20:46:00.001-04:00

Earlier this morning a vanilla friend of mine sent me a screen shot of a Facebook exchange on the topic of pornography, incited by a recent article in The Globe and Mail titled “The Rise of Ethical Porn.” (In case you’re not clear on what that means, it refers to porn in which female performers get to choose their partners; are treated, along, with their male co-stars, with dignity and respect; and are intimately involved in the creative process.)

She figured, rightly, that the nature of the FB comments linked to the article might inspire some sort of blog-based, porn-defending response from me. Damn, she was right.

Through My Bedroom's Looking Glass

2013-05-09T00:00:00.000-04:00

Here's part three of another real, kinky, BDSM sex story that took place recently in our apartment in Montreal. On this particular Sunday afternoon, I got to play the dominant femme to my very own nylon-clad, corseted submissive, Alicia Frederika.... until things took a turn.

If you want to read parts one and two of this story, check out my earlier posts, Down the Rabbit Hole and Queen of Hearts.

* * *

After maneuvering in and out of a series of awkward poses, Frederika and I decide that it’s time for a costume change. We leave PC and black Fred talking in the living room, and make our way to my bedroom.

Nervy Cybersex

2013-05-02T00:00:00.001-04:00

Ever have wild, impromptu cybersex? What about a virtual threesome? A couple of years back while I was doing "research" for the blog on a hipster, love-sex-personals site, I often adopted a male persona to interact with other users. In this particular exchange, my alter ego, "xs," a 25-year old grad student studying philosophy (i.e., a horny young man with a lot of free time on his hands), scored himself a little afternoon delight.

Note that any text appearing in [pink placed between square brackets] indicates me talking to you, and is not part of the original cyberchat transcript.

Enjoy!

Emma xox

* * *

JUNE 10, 2:00PM

kas - I think you're awesome.

CAN RELATE (8) CAN'T RELATE (3) FLAG FOR ABUSE Comment (71)

Read more »

Fifty Shades Fucked

2013-04-29T00:00:00.000-04:00

Here's a special treat to help you ease in to your manic Monday routine. Penned by my friend, mentor, and now collaborator, A. Hazudó from Siren Song Publishing, this parody of the Fifty Shades of Grey trilogy made me cry laughing! (I confess to having a Bruges moment when the dwarf made an appearance.)

Missed the first two parts? Check out Fifty Shades of... Earl Gray? and Fifty Shades More Ridiculous.

Emma xox

* * *

Part 3: Enter the Dwarf

Mihaela held the cudgel in her hand, uncertain as to what to do next. “Oh my,” she said to herself aloud (if that is even possible), “Does he really want me to put it in that naughty place? It might hurt,” she whispered in a husky voice.

Real Friends, Real Benefits

2013-04-25T09:41:00.002-04:00

To imagine my Dani, picture Daenerys
with dark hair and brown eyes.

This post is dedicated to Dani + Sean, and to my FetLife friend passionate_kink, who expressed a desire to read "more details about the senses, feelings, and touches at the time of the actual sexual/kinky encounters." I hope I haven't let you down!

Emma xox

* * *

I've had an epiphany recently. Fucking friends is more satisfying than fucking strangers. There. I said it. After close to three years of ranting about the joys of anonymous sex, I've finally figured out why polyamorous players prefer to fuck people whom they already care about – or become friends with those whom they love to fuck.

For one, the sex is more intimate. When my new muse Dani, dark-eyed and raven-haired, Khaleesi of my heart, whose fierce compassion and commitment to social causes rivals the passion of Daenerys, the dragon queen… when her hands graze my skin I can feel the fire in her fingertips kindle a need in me I have never experienced with another woman.

I’m drawn to her, I want her, I want to devour her…. When PC and her lover touch me, somehow, they seem so distant…. A veil envelops she and I as we melt into each other, arm in arm, legs entwined, her hair falling over my eyes…. Deeper, I want to go deeper, to pull her inside out… I force myself to hold back, this is our first time, what if I scare her off?

Fifty Shades More Ridiculous

2013-04-22T00:00:00.000-04:00

Missed the first part? Check out Fifty Shades of... Earl Gray?

Emma xox

* * *

Part 2: Dungeons (& Dragons?)

They had dined well and were on their second bottle of Chateau de Sade, a wine Harry had brought up from his special cellar. The dill doe had been delicious, sliding down the palate, throbbing delightfully still in her gullet. Mihaela had arrived promptly at eight as he had ordered with the steaming dish. She had dressed specially for the occasion, in a rented French maid’s outfit with a butt-twitcher skirt and fishnet stockings. She had worn pink lipstick for the occasion, and done her hair in cute curls that made her look like a trashy Cabbage Patch doll.

Easter Saturday Night at Montreal Sex Club Le Celeste

2013-04-18T00:00:00.000-04:00

In my series of real Montreal sex stories, I take you inside some of the city's most notorious sex clubs. Read on to find out how my husband and I pick up other swinger couples & hot singles for threesomes, foursomes, and orgies.

Below you'll find a review of our most recent visit to Le Céleste.

* * *

It’s been quite a while since PC and I checked in at Le Céleste. Want the full 411 on the scene, including my take on the price hikes, the latest renovations, the players, and the action? Keep reading. You won’t be disappointed.

Fifty Shades of... Earl Gray?

2013-04-14T00:00:00.001-04:00

Here's a special treat to help you ease in to your manic Monday routine. Penned by my friend, mentor, and now collaborator, A. Hazudó from Siren Song Publishing, this first instalment of his Fifty Shades of Grey parody made me cry laughing!

Emma xox

* * *

Part 1: Horny at the Hardware Store

She stood by the cash, horny. They were all around her, construction workers with bulging biceps, smelling of man sweat. She felt a familiar tingle in a familiar place, and running her fingers covertly down her leg, she slid her fingers into her secret grotto, slick with secretions. It was all very familiar, and she felt a familiar feeling as she murmured to herself in throaty moans or murmurs of profound longing.

Queen of Hearts

2013-04-11T00:00:00.000-04:00

Frederika, my model pet

If you want to read the first part of this story, check out my earlier post, Down the Rabbit Hole.

* * *

If you remember, the last time you saw Alicia Frederika she was kneeling submissively in the middle of my living room carpet. PC held her leash.

"Wait — Hot Fred?"

Frederika flashes a broad smile, eyes fixing on the bustier of my red lace slip.

Love Fool

2013-04-04T00:00:00.000-04:00

On April Fool's Day of last year, I fucked off this blog. I had to stop writing. At first, it was about privacy – about wanting to get our BDSM kinks on without an audience to judge or condemn us (not all my readers are strangers to my husband and I). My short-lived experiences in the Montreal kink scene taught me the value of discretion. Later, I had other, more personal reasons for walking away.

Down the Rabbit Hole

2013-03-28T00:00:00.000-04:00

Here's another real, kinky, BDSM sex story that took place recently in our apartment in Montreal. On this particular Sunday afternoon, I got to play the dominant femme to my very own nylon-clad, corseted submissive.

* * *

On Sunday afternoon, I get home from a brisk bagel run and a leisurely stopover at a local café to catch up with a girlfriend. Sliding the key in the lock, I barely have time to turn it before the door swings wide open. Hubby steps aside to let me in, navy blue robe exposing his bare chest down to his navel.

“Why don’t you take a shower, freshen up a little?” He says with a mischievous grin wide like a Cheshire cat’s. “I’ve got something special planned for you this afternoon….” I stare at him wide-eyed. He leans in to kiss me, stubble grazing my lower lip. Pulling me closer, one hand gripping my hips, I melt into him, mouth on his neck, brown paper bagel bag crushed up against his right arm.

Suddenly he pushes me away. “Go,” he commands. Eyes gleaming, he gives me a devious, sidelong stare.

Jailed & Nailed Inside Montreal's Sex Club l'Orage - Part 2

2013-03-21T00:00:00.000-04:00

If you’d like to read the first part of the adventure I conclude in this post, featuring the delicious unicorn Mariève, it begins here.

* * *

1:45 A.M. Saturday Morning
L’Orage Club, 7387 Saint-Hubert

It’s a slow night at L’Orage. There’s one guy sitting by himself at the bar, sipping what looks like a gin & tonic, making small talk with JeePee, the shaggy-haired owner. Another lingers in the back room. Holding hands, we cross the empty dance floor and make our way straight to the jail cell near the showers.

Jailed & Nailed Inside Montreal's Sex Club l'Orage - Part 1

2013-03-14T00:00:00.000-04:00

Like my new underwear? I wasn't wearing any when
I went to L'Orage on this particular Friday night....

* * *

11:30 P.M. Friday
Le Ballroom, 3643 Saint-Laurent

PC and I get suckered into meeting up with Mariève, a hot, curvy, 25 year-old unicorn I met playing volleyball on Mont-Royal during the summer. It’s her birthday. She’s celebrating at the Ballroom, a hipster dance bar on Saint-Laurent.

The place tastes like teen spirit. Barely legal and early 20 somethings stumble over each other drunk. Bi-curious young women fall out of their tops and into each other’s arms, making out like an armistice to WWIII has just been declared, celebrating their sexual frustration by exacerbating it with provocative displays of lust that are likely to lead nowhere. (They’ll never fuck. Take it from one who knows: Flirting with straight girls won’t ever get you laid.)

Jungle Fever

2013-03-07T00:00:00.000-05:00

I love a good ass fuck, but I’m always mortified when, after blowing his load, PC pulls out and I see a brownish smear on his cock. Scat is not something we’re into, although he’s always a gentleman when there’s a little shit on his pole (thankfully!).

Maybe I shouldn’t be so squeamish. According to recent research into the mating behaviour of certain animal species, kinky sex is natural.

Lazy Rider

2013-02-28T00:00:00.001-05:00

In this Montreal sex story, I reflect on the dominant-submissive dynamic that underlies the open relationship I share with my husband, and the impact that mental BDSM has on my preference of sexual positions.

* * *

Can a man be too good in bed? Can he be so good that the woman he fucks on the regular becomes lazy? Now, I don’t mean starfish, lie on your back and stare at the ceiling lazy. The kind of complacency I’m talking about takes another form: The perpetual bottom, the missionary lover.

The answer is yes.

Bold Leopold

2013-02-21T09:44:00.002-05:00

Seeing this naked would make me horny too.

Curious about sex tourism but tired of the beaches? For all you adult, non-monogamous art fetishists out there seeking likeminded players, you might want to check out this little piece of news and head to Vienna before March 3rd....

* * *

I assume that you’re familiar with the French resort town of Cap d'Agde, located on the coast of the Mediterranean? According to the plug on SDC (Swinger Dating Club), the locale can hold close to 40,000 people and boasts of some of the best swinger clubs in the world.

Beach resorts are common enough hunting grounds for casual sex. The rise in both designated (Desire) and covert (Melia at Los Cabos?) North American destinations speaks to that.

However, what about the less obvious, yet possibly more exciting venues – more exciting precisely because they usually discourage public nudity? What about an art gallery?

Stay Tuned: Back in April!

2013-02-19T10:40:00.000-05:00

Ok, I lied! I'm back already! In April I'll give you the heads up on why I was gone for so long. Until then, enjoy!

E. xox

Epilogue

2012-04-01T18:43:00.000-04:00

Man's feelings are always purest and most glowing in the hour of meeting and of farewell.

-Johann Paul Friedrich Richter

Dear readers,

PC and I have arrived at a momentous conclusion: We wish temporarily to close off our relationship -- not only from other lovers, but, sadly, also from you, dear readers. Understand that this was a very difficult decision to make, and that I have wrestled with it since the New Year.

Non-Consensual Kink

2012-03-28T06:00:00.000-04:00

It seems that I’ve hit an unlucky streak lately when it comes to other people’s public displays of kink. First there was the fiasco at Club Sin, and now this: A couple of weeks ago, right before that blistering heat wave settled over city, I was flashed on my way to the metro.

Here’s what happened: It was close to midday. I had just walked passed a grade school and a construction site in a quiet (i.e., deserted) residential neighborhood when I noticed a thin guy of average height up ahead of me. In another part of the city his worn-in sweats, dark checkered shirt concealing a faded hoodie, and mesh-back baseball cap would hardly merit mention.

Necessary Drama

2012-03-21T06:00:00.000-04:00

“Suffering by nature or by chance never seems so painful as the suffering inflicted on us by the arbitrary will of another.”
- Schopenhauer

Kinksters abhor “drama.” But how far does the scene’s “safe, sane, and consensual” mantra protect players from abuse?

Taking the lead from the etymology of the word “drama” – δράω (drao) “to act, to take action, to achieve” – I’m going to take action and cause some drama of my own by giving you the heads up on why you should avoid Montreal’s Club Sin.

Desperately Seeking: My Dream Dom

2012-03-14T06:00:00.000-04:00

Are you a submissive seeking a Dominant? Are you curious to learn more about the personality profile of a good Dom? If your answer is “yes” to either of these questions, then this post is for you.

Credits: I’d like to thank SapioSlut for sending me the FetLife link to this post, written by TheSensualDom2008. Note that at over 3000 words the original version of this essay is friggin’ long, so I’ve taken the liberty to edit the text for clarity and added section headers to facilitate reading.

BDSM for Beginners

2012-03-07T06:00:00.000-05:00

Are you curious about BDSM, but scared to jump right in and meet people in the scene? In this post I’ll give you some pointers on how to get started and how to stay safe.

Submissive Ritual

2012-02-29T06:00:00.000-05:00

Lately I’ve been thinking a lot about dominance and submission (D/s), particularly in terms of how it impacts my relationship with my husband, PC. To be specific, D/s seems to extend beyond the roles we adopt in our private, BDSM play scenes.

In an earlier post I mentioned how this dynamic has been integral to our relationship since the start, even though PC balks at the term “Dominant,” and, until recently, I never acknowledged my role as the “submissive” in our interaction. Nonetheless, the more I read about BDSM, the more I’ve come to realize that we are in some ways negotiating a mental, 24/7 Dom/sub relationship.

Sub Frenzy

2012-02-22T06:00:00.000-05:00

As you can imagine from my previous post, kinky Dom's scenarios drove me wild – I was horny enough to take on a battalion of men and still want more. Sex (and submissive scenarios in particular) was on my mind 24/7. In short, I suffered from an acute case of sub frenzy.